Been reading TRP for 6-7 months now (I think.) Background Info: - I'm 20 y.o, black, SMV 5-6 14% BF, working a 9-5 currently.

  • TRP has helped me in all areas of my life, including women. I've been trying to game women, but I don't have much objective value. I have good social skills and an awesome personality, but no objective value.

  • My ex is that of 2 years. We were on and off both of those years since first coming into college.

Now for the story.

This past weekend, I took a trip back to the College I attended to spend time with friends. (Spent 2 years in college, decided to go the military route to boost my SMV, then return later.) I hit up this HB5 on Snapchat and visited her apartment. Thursday goes by and I fuck her 3 times. (2 times Thursday night, 1 time Friday morning).

Fast forward a few hours, and my EX HB6 sees me at an event on campus. She performed with her dance team, and after their performance, the floor was open for everyone to dance. I'm a good dancer (street dance, hip hop, pop'n locking) so I step on the floor and kill it. Frat bros dap me up, and girls are eyeing me. (Social Proof). The song changes, she walks up to me, and we hit it off on the dance floor. We have a natural chemistry, so of course, we showed out in front of everyone that was there. Lots of talking, IOIs, grinding, touching. You all know.

I came to the event with my bros, but I left with her. She drives us to go get food, and I keep myself emotionally distant while allowing for her to put in more effort than I do in our interactions. Afterward, we went back to my bro's apartment. I was proud of myself for staying light-hearted and not letting my old emotions get riled up.

Here's where I fucked up. We usually fuck, but I decided to withhold myself from her just to prove to myself that I could. We cuddle and fall asleep. She wakes me up at 2 am saying "I can't sleep."

Of course, I dick her down. She falls asleep. I fall asleep. We wake up again. We fuck 2 more times. We went out to eat afterward. While riding on the way to the restaurant, I feel a strong chemical change occurring in my brain.

My mood suddenly dropped, but why? Fast forward, and we're eating. She's able to quickly identify cracks in my armor, saying "I'm not getting good vibes from you right now. You're not yourself." I try and force myself to keep a fake positive attitude. I fail. We then leave the restaurant.

We get in the car, and I don't say a word to her. I'm taking deep, deliberate breaths, observing myself in 3rd person meditation technique, going down a list of all possible reasons for my mood swing.

I came to these conclusions:

  1. I've somehow invested more (emotionally) than I needed to.

  2. My subconscious mind somehow realized that I had been used, even though my conscious mind seems satisfied with the way things turned out.**

Fucking Beta tendencies. I had TRP knowledge, but my emotions still leaked out.

What do you all think?