Both men and women seek validation but it comes at a great price. Women seek attention as a form of validation because it shows them their physical appearance is something men desire. Their self worth is therefore dependent on getting attention. This can be costly because being seen as easy or slutty will lower their social value. When girls shit test a beta they are often instantly validated and have no more appeal for the beta. An alpha on the other hand makes them work for the validation. Guys seek approval as a form of validation. This is also very costly as it can both lower your social status as well as your resources. Betas take the cheap validation of just having a girls approval in the form of being allowed to orbit. Rather than depending on someone else for validation by being either a beta or a slut, it is important to learn to love yourself aka self validation. Self validation is a difficult process because you have to learn to believe in yourself as well as avoid the urge to seek validation through cheap means like buying a girl a drink or giving a guy a handy. There is a reason why going to the gym or putting hard work into something else raises your self esteem. Self respect is avoiding the urge to get cheap validation.

TL;DR: It is easier to avoid the urge to get cheap validation through someone else and learn to avoiding being to quick to validate others if you learn to validate yourself.

While on the subject of validation. I realized today in a father daughter relationship, its the fathers role to be the alpha from whom the daughter seeks validation. If the father is a beta and too quick to validate the daughter regardless of her behavior the daughter will seek validation from elsewhere. This makes me wonder whether there is a correlation between the ever increasinly beta fathers and a more promiscuous female population. This is also a good way to look at the difference between being an alpha and being an asshole. You shouldn't be mean to people, you should just give out less validation, and avoid the urge to validate yourself through someone else.