Guys,

I will keep it short-ish but basically my head is a mess and my mind keeps swinging between different options on what to do and I’m don’t know what to do anymore so I’m looking for some advice as you have no emotional attachment to the outcome.

Basically I want my ex back, typical story I know where a nice guy in recovery (me) has oneitis for his ex...

I was married for 8yrs, had 2 kids and got divorced 2yrs ago and that is when I discovered TRP and I have been practising the techniques on the ex since trying to get her back, yeah I know still blue pill as Rollo would say, but 40yrs of blue pill conditioning I can’t just flick a switch and change in a few months, I wish I could, but I’m learning a lot in the process and with some success, we haven’t stopped having sex since the split despite her dating other guys, so something must be working otherwise why wouldn’t she tell me to fuck off, as she ended things because I was such a bitch in the marriage, so does that mean I’m doing something right now?

But things never go beyond sex, at first I’m cool with just sex but over time I start wanting her back.

I haven’t dated anyone else, well, been on a few dates but I wasn’t interested, I am open to meeting someone else but options are limited, most women in there 30’s are rough, overweight or have 2+ kids, and having 2 kids myself I didn’t really fancy getting serious with someone with multiple kids to look after, so things are limited.

So part of me thinks keep having sex with the ex and see if anything changes, but then I think nothings changed in the last couple of years so why would it now.

Part of me thinks keep the ex on the side to avoid a dry spell whilst keep searching for someone else. Then I either get the ex back or someone better.

But then I found out from my kids that one of the other guys is back in the picture this last weekend as they all went to the beach and the kids were saying they had a good time, obviously the ex didn’t mention anything.

So now I’m thinking here we go again as we have been here a few times before with this guy, it’s like she goes between him and me a lot, and I’m not sure if I can be arsed with this roundabout anymore.

Part of me is scared to lose what is going on between us as I may never get her back, or if I just ignore her apart from when it comes to raises the kids, or even pretending to be dating someone else to make her jealous as she hasn’t felt what it’s like to lose me as since the breakup I’ve always been there sexually, I don’t know, all sorts going through my head.

If I was to give someone else advice I would say stop playing her games and focus on yourself and having fun alone, she needs to feel what it’s like for you not to be there for her when things seem to go wrong with this other guy, and if things change in the future with the ex and she starts making a serious effort to get you back then see what happens.

But then I think I’m fucking her right now, she can’t seem to get enough of me and is very flirty and we’re having sex at least twice a week, so would stopping that be shooting myself in the foot, and round I go again...

I guess it comes down to what do I want, and I can’t help but want her back, but because I seem to be more into her frame right now it wouldn’t work even if we did get back together. She has to want me back and work to get me back and right now that isn’t the case.

Help lol