As any modern male developing within society, blue pill tendencies appeared to be the most appealing and potentially successful methods of behavior to internalize. But here's the kicker in regards to me I'm black, athletic, and prep school educated. My father passed from MS when I was a teenager and didn't offer much guidance in the years before. As a result I was neutered by my mother and sister for most of my life.

In light of this I embodied a blue pill mindset within a alpha exterior. I want to be cautious of simply stroking my ego so I ask that you infer the legitimacy of the work I've put into better myself in light of necessity in my home life and social life as a minority in prep school and college. The importance of my experince is that regardless of the multitude of exterior benefits you have your behavior is immensely more impactful. Your behavior is facilitated by your mind and your mind is the result of your habits, beliefs, and certainties you gather from your environment. I truly believed in and executed blue pill behavior and had it not been for my other traits I would have been guaranteed to have had essentially zero success. Not just sexual but relational. My relationships are important to me so much so that Psychology and philosophy have developed into serious pastimes of mine that are in route to a pre law track. Yet even while toiling with complicated subjects as these; I have never found my self more dumbfounded then when interacting with a women.

An example of this in my experience occurred when I was 16 and began dating a girl from Spain attending my school in Connecticut. I was actually trying to woo her friend from Spain to no avail, and luckily took notice of her fixation on me. She oozed feminine sexuality, and was working with some serious weaponry. Yet even in light of her apparent interest I was extremely cautions, which isn't a negative approach until it becomes excessively so. She was comfortable and confident enough to take the early steps in our relationship. She did everything aside from plant her lips to mine for her first kiss and texted me to hang out primarily. What I failed to understand was that this attractive wonderful girl was not interested in the notion of guy subservient to her. I was attentive, sweet, understanding to a point of excess, I coddled her mood and when the relationship began to falter my insecurity only perpetuated it. The reality of the relationship revolved around the fact that she was a foreign student interested in a sexual relationship with an attractive socially established varsity athlete. There's nothing menacing in that desire but it lacks sincerity. The qualities listed above are essential in moderation to a successful relationship but the delivery of those emotions and feelings and the frequency in which they are delivered is crucial.

Sincere concern, commitment and passivity proved to be immensely detrimental to the relationship in light of the "Equal" footing narrative that has been said to be desired by women. I mean its mind-blowing and its not just women who are superficially motivated. People in general as humans interact in this type of political manner, as a result it takes years to cultivate a genuine relationship; as it should. What I believe needs to be taken note of, however is that the narrative surrounding behavior with and in accordance to women in modern society is a severe farce. Like almost laughably bad from a cynics perspective. I wrote this because this subbreddit has allowed me to put faith in a realization I had in part arrived at some time ago. Life had shoved a red pill down my throat from a young age in order to spare myself some suffering I latched onto some pretty meek ideals which have only hindered my growth. I wish you guys nothing but the best; pursue truth and a more fulfilled life with sincerity and vigor!

Edit: Formatting and I gave an example.