Like most any attempt to do anything of substance, it is two steps forward and one step back. For me the hate, which I thought I had conquered, is back in a new and profound way. I no longer hate women directly, I have a better understanding of them and do not expect anything from them and am rarely disappointed even if I do not succeed with them. However, I have begun to stop looking at myself. I have opened up my eyes to my friends, to family members and the worst of all my father, my brother, and my girlfriends parents. It is hard to not hate the women in my life who have such a grip on people close to me. I see my mother treat my father like a loser, he has given up and tries to keep busy as if he is still for a moment in her presence then the demands and bitching is relentless. (I still love my mother). Then my brothers girlfriend, who left him for an up and coming athlete, only to get back together blaming him constantly for his mistakes as to why she was forced to leave him. My girlfriends father works his ass off for a obese women who sits at home all day and watched tv...they havent been intimate for a decade. She has a free fucking ride and still complains non stop about him and is incredibly judgmental of everyone else especially me. (I keep my mouth shut but one of these days) And so many of my friends have been scooped up by the drug of the vagina and the politically correct masculine role. My hate is back. And it is hate in a different form, its like a silent resentment. This is the worst thing about trp, you can never unsee once you see. Any Ideas?
I must note that the this makes the few great women in my life seem almost supernatural.