I might ask this in seduction but wanted to get an opinion here first. Keep something in mind if you do respond: I generally don't give a fuck about morality (or at least I'm trying not to).

I've been going out and doing cold approaches on girls with a buddy of mine. Usually what ends up happening is we point out and approach sex worthy women, but there are a lot of instances where we won't approach that ends up limiting us severely depending on circumstance & chance. We won't approach a hot girl if:

  • She is in a group of 3 - 7 people
  • If she looks like she would be underage
  • If she is in a set with another guy AT ALL
  • If she looks like she is with her parents (mother / father)
  • If she is on a mode of transportation or getting into a mode of transportation (calling / getting into taxi, on subway, riding on bike, running, etc).
  • Sometimes I won't approach if the girl is on a phone call. I've gotten really bad reactions from doing that.

Now... I live in NYC. As you can imagine, there are a LOT of women floating around, but it just so happens that a lot of times one of these instances will be at the forefront and it really makes it harder sometimes. For instance if you go out on a college night, 80% of the women out are in huge groups or with at least 1 guy (who is presumably watching out for the entire group).

I'm almost answering my own question, but how do you guys handle this? I want to get to a place where I'm not limited by surrounded circumstances, and I want to see if anyone else feels the same way (or any legal / safety advice). I really want a 18yr old (or a 17yr old.. legal in NYC) and sometimes I'll see a young girl walking (or a group of young girls walking) and feel like such a fucking pervert (I'm in my late 20's) walking up and spitting game. But I SHOULD just be able to walk up and say hi anyway... I should walk up, open them, ask them their ages, and then if they're legal then proceed as normal.

When I see a big group of women, it almost seems impossible. They have plans, they're on a mission, I'd just be bothering them. Also... it puts INSANE pressure on me and the woman. Not only is she looking at me how she normally would, she's looking to her girls she's with for approval.

I've NEVER approached a mixed set before in my life (for those uninitiated, a mixed set has at least one guy in it). Whenever I see a guy, I think it could be the boyfriend, the husband, the brother, the son, the lover, the beta orbiter... but I always think that I'm really risking it because the guy could either get violent (I mean I do lift so maybe this isn't such a huge concern) or really give a negative reaction because it's his girl. Don't really know how to approach this..

Also a side point before I continue: sometimes I'll see a girl that I like and the reason this hurts me, is I'll immediately try to assess if she's with anyone. I'll see a girl & guy walking close and I have to spend time following them to see if they're actually in the same group, and then try to figure out by watching them if they're boyfriend / husband / on a date. But that ends up getting me in a reactionary state of mind rather than to just act and let the other person react, and that state of mind even fucks up approaching single sets.

If a girl is on a subway or something it almost seems bad etiquette to approach her. I wonder if having morals in a situation like this is just a bad idea. It just seems like it would be uncomfortable to her (and to me as an extension). Same thing on a bus. And a girl calling a taxi is like "well she's calling a taxi, shouldn't bother her because she's going home anyway"

The parents thing in NYC is huge. A lot of girls with their parents. This is by far the most intimidating approach, especially if the girl is with her father. Is this even possible to make this work? Should I at least go up and ask their relationship? If I got a good response, is there any world where I say the girl is cute and father doesn't get aggressive / violent? Also keep in mind this is compounded if the girl looks like she's not of age (or is merely just 18 and the father doesn't like that).

Lastly, the girl on the phone. This has never went well for me, so I usually just don't do it, especially if the girl is on the move, walking and on the cell phone... any ideas here?

I want to hopefully knock down any barriers that I can in terms of approaching the type of women I find attractive. The first step is being comfortable with approaching girls in a big group of girls, but I'm hoping someone can advise me on other situations.