So I was in a LTR for 8 years with an HB8 that is 26 years old. She broke up with me because I didn't want marriage. I got myself thinking that I got the better end of the deal. She gave me her best years of her life and is now leaving me when my best years are about to start according to the SMV chart. But it doesn't feel like that. I have been so used to fucking everyday it is painful not being able to do that. I been trying to get plates but I haven't been able to. It frustrates me when I hear all these success stories and I think to myself they are either lying or im doing something wrong. Then I remember about the 80/20 rule and think to myself all these guys can't be in the 20 percent. I read the rational male about plate spinning. I started thinking how many people are really able to do that, is it a good idea to be making the 80 percent of males believe that they will be able to plate spin? So my SMV dropped since I met her and I have been working hard to get it up. Also on another random note I started thinking that any girl no matter how hot she is, she will end up leaving you or the sex will get stale or worst case scenario deadbedroom and cheat on you.

Wtf man idk what is going through my head. I think my SMV is at least a 7.5 and I'm still having trouble getting plates. My redpill teachers lead me to enlightenment.