I've realized recently that I'm depressed. I had no fucking idea until I read some things that described me perfectly.
I fit into the irritable/aggitated depression. I don't get sad but I get so angry at even the smallest things on some days even just someone making noise while eating.
I'm trying to find the cause and I honestly think it has to do with my ex.
She broke my heart 6 months ago and despite reading redpill and trying my hardest I'm still a work in progress.
I realize women won't bring happiness but the fact that I'm trying to get women and I've had no success makes me feel helpless.
I have dreams where she is just happy. She is always with new guys. She is always having fun at bars. Etc etc.
I think the jealousy kills me subconsciously because I'm busting my ass and suffering through life with little rewards. She is a complete loser but gets what she wants because she is an attractive woman.
I notice these depression symptoms arise when I think of her, and although I stop as soon as I can I don't think my subconscious can stop.
Every failiure with a new woman makes me think of her. Every night I'm doing homework alone I think of her knowing she is in a bar having fun. Etc etc.
I know the only fix would be to find someone else, not that they'll make me happy but just because I'll finally feel like I have power and a choice to move on....
Can someone shed some advice or help me. I thought I was over her but I realize now that I'm completely not.
[–]surrealmermaid1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]21alx 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link