First of all, I am not a red piller and I'm only asking this because I read the link about framing. I immediately recognized the technique of framing because I naturally started using it to protect myself from what I felt was abuse by my old "friends". These people were very intelligent, and could tear into my self-esteem if I gave them enough control. Applying the technique to other relationships has been effective and I feel secure in relationships that I commit to. However, I often find that in order to implement framing I need to stay quiet for most of a conversation, because if I admit to someone else's premise (their frame) then I end up sabotaging myself. I often find that people think that I don't like them, or they become adversarial because I don't pitch in at times they want me to. This is fine if I don't need a relationship, but a lot of the time at work or in social situations I need to just talk. Do you guys think it's worth it to become a sycophant sometimes to a conversation leader if you just need to get into a conversation for casual relationships with coworkers/etc?