Not sure if this belongs here or /r/depression but I think something is seriously wrong with me. To keep things short, over the past four years some of the hottest girls I have ever met have practically begged me to date them and I refused them all claiming depression as my main excuse, and thinking they wouldn't be happy with someone like me etc. Then they move on and I wonder why I am so lonely? This seems to permeate all aspects of my life including friendships, I hardly talk to or hang out with any of my "friends" and it just drives me deeper and deeper into the rabbit hole. Now it has been 2 months since I graduated high school with few if any friends and little hope for a future... How do I stop this toxic behavior before it is too late?