Title. My "internal" frame is extremely weak, and I want to figure out how to fix that in y'alls opinion.

Who I am:

Body: 21, 6'2" white, low bodyfat, I'm muscly but not quite jacked yet. Have a fade haircut. Sizeable wrist tattoo. I already like my body, improving it won't improve my self-esteem.

Careerwise: Studying Engineering. Had an internship, looks good going into the future. At some point I think I'll want to go back to college to study Mathematics, but I won't do that until I've built up a bit of money first.

Interests: Math. I read a shite ton of mathy stuff because I'm interested in it. And not numberphile tier stuff, books like Radically Elementary Probability theory, alternatives to Von-Neumann Expected Utility, a tiny bit of quantum, etc. I'm also extremely interested in cognitive science. In my opinion, Where Mathematics Comes From will be instrumental in creating General Intelligence. Whenever I get bored, I usually do High Intensity workouts.

Social life: Didn't even have one until last year. I never had real friends until last year, just acquaintances. This fucked me up in high school, and it fucked me up in the beginning of college. My freshman year of college I didn't socialize. Had some housemates that high school me would love to be friends with, but they were such beta bitches I couldn't respect them. They are actually the reason I switched into Engineering from Computer Science. Computer Science has become the default major for thirsty Betas. My housemates showed me I didn't want to be like them. I started spiraling. Weak internal frame begets weak internal frame. Sophomore year I joined a professional fraternity. Internal frame was still extremely weak back then, made bad choices, creeped people the fucked out. I was sexually assaulted by someone in the fraternity when I was drunk. Didn't say anything for a semester, then told someone in my leadership. They basically let the school deal with it, and banned the both of us until the investigation ended. Did not help my reputation in the fraternity. I had nearly no evidence, the school wouldn't take any action against him. Fraternity unbanned us both after investigation ended. According to the fraternity he has as much right to go to their events as much as I do and i refuse to be in the same room as him, so they have effectively removed me from the fraternity. Junior year. Get purple pilled, use red pill principles to start sating this girl. Start acting beta around her, she breaks up with me for not being "physically attractive". Fuck. Join professional organization, made some friends, now a senior in college. This is my last year to not fuck myself up, but I'm alreay starting to make the mistakes I made with my fraternity around my new friend group. Not fun.

Sex: Fucked girl in high school, got none since. The girl I dated when I was a junior I never fucked, which is embarrassing. Feel cucked by life itself. Fuck man.

Main problem: I know from the red pill how to act, how to hold frame, etc, but when it actually comes down to it, I fuck it up and I completely lose frame. It's incredibly difficult for me to apply frame to reality.

Solution: Don't know. I think I should start taking SSRI's to fix my moodswings. When I get bad, I make horrible decisions that lose my frame horribly, I think this has been the source of most of my issues. Not sure though. I used to be incredibly against them, thinking all I had to do was change myself, but it's become really apparent that that plan didn't work out. I think it will modulate myself and my actions, just enough so I can actually apply red pill principles. ¯\(ツ)/¯

What do you think about SSRI's?