I recently moved out of my abusive parents’ house and into an apartment with a roommate.

My roommate is an alcoholic.

My job doesn’t pay half bad, but it’s full of lowlifes, uneducated individuals, and immature individuals.

I’ve made friends there, they’re good hearted people, but they aren’t on the same page as I.

I’m very hungry for success. I’m disciplined, driven, and ambitious as fuck. And while I’m far from perfect and I’m not trying to say I’m better than these people, I cannot make myself comfortable with mediocrity.

Everything about my life right now is mediocre. I’m in a shitty little town in central Illinois that’s just nice enough to not be a complete trashy ghetto but way too ghetto and trashy to be nice.

I have an opportunity to move to another state and stay with some friends until I’ve gained my financial foothold in the new area. It’s a big city in Pennsylvania and everything is just nicer out there. I’ll have to make new friends but maybe that’s not a bad thing if I can find friends that bring me up instead of pull me down.

I’m also heavily into music and finding musicians to start a band with in this area has been practically impossible. It’s hard to get anyone to commit. They all say they’re dedicated but when it comes down to it, they flake.

The music scene where I’m thinking of moving too is much more alive than where I currently am. There’s an abundance of musicians that play the same music as I, so much so that even if most of them turn out to be wish-washy as well, there’ll be enough to find ones that aren’t.

My current friends are probably gonna feel betrayed, but then again I think it’s more likely they’ll just go back to their lives and to a certain extent forget about me.

My family will freak out, but I’ve never liked them to begin with. It makes me kinda sad to have to alienate them like this, but it’s better than the torture of being around them.

Parts of me are saying it would be nice but isn’t necessary. Other parts are saying I’d hate it there just as much as I hate it here. And others still are saying that moving eight hundred miles away is the necessary shock to the system that will drive me toward the life I desire.