Hi all, i am 17 and highschool student and next year i'll go university. In my country students need to pass the exam to enter to university so i just focused my exam but i feel like nothing changes in my life h

My trp started at 16 because of one sided love. Story is short i was fat and i wasn't self confident (i couldn't play the guitar in front of people etc.) After rejection i started to read about TRP and i focused my improvement ( i'm now better guitarist and i've more muscles now) on the surface it should changed me but inside i think i've still got "Blue Pill Effect" i already wrote 2 entries about How to get rid of oneitis but still i want this girl that rejected me before. It's not problem anymore, i'm okay with this thoughts. But:

The BIG problem is i feel like nothing is changing.I 'm trying to copy asshole's actings but something inside me always tells be more gentle, more quiet but if i started to do what my instinct wants i feel like i will be loser than i've been before because of that i'm trying to act like a assholes but the girls still have same thoughts on me they are thinking like i'm still the Good guy how can i change it