I have anxiety issues, I want to feel calm and strong inside but I can't sustain even a few minutes. I never had a girlfriend ( also never had sex ) and am close to 30. Woman really wants me but I always chicken out, then get anxious because Im getting older and think like those are my last chances to be with 18-20 years olds. Sorry but those are the hottest girls, most go crazy or sag or get crazy because they sag after 25 or something. Every time girl is interested and I can't go talk which is couple of times in a month I get more bitter feel more anxious I don't want to use medication but also can't find a way out of my mind I feel so sick and tired of those racing thoughts. Also I live with my family and have no job probably won't have until I graduate a year later. I can't stand waiting anymore. I know I need to see a psychologist and I already did but don't want to use medication maybe I should use? In class people see me as alpha as they can be, guys trying to be my friend which is probably because I look above average fit enough and wear good. Girls always check me out but they probably can't guess I'm a virgin, they admire me and I admire their youth! Those guys are 18-19 they have 10 years in front of them even if they do a lot of mistakes they would still be good, they have time to be stupid still they will have better careers and lives.