This is my experience at a Halloween party that has revealed how far I am from self-confidence.

​

My family background has been filled with Christian lifestyle and restrictions. This has put me on disadvantage with other guys at gaming girls at parties. It has only been 1 year since I´ve changed my mindset from "nice guy" to become "red pilled". Now as a 17 year old, I can say I understand the theory, but OH BOY, living what I read is challenging.

​

Last night I went to a Halloween party. I was really hyped. It had been almost a year since my last big party. Of course, I always try to apply Red Pill concepts when I go out. This time I had a first interaction with a 9/10 blondie who was seating alone and overcome my approach anxiety. In my opinion, it went well. I made a couple of jokes and did not backed off when she ignored me. I messed up when I did not had an excuse to take her to the dance party, but this is only a matter of more practice.

​

I decided to land the dance floor. This does not represent a threat to me anymore, as I could give 0 fucks if girls wanted to dance with me or not. Well, I had a fair success. Landed three 7+/10 girls and managed to kiss one. I did not give much importance to this, as I don´t want to put women on pedestal. Nevertheless, I did not remember girls kissing so good. Women are beautiful creatures. Well, we continued kissing until, due to my lack of experience, I accidentally kissed her nose. I acted like nothing happened, but still it came out weird. She tried to get off with the excuse that "she was going to look for her friend", but I just went for the kiss again and succeeded. Afterwards, she told me she needed to go, but I can wait for her to return. NOW, I really don´t know if this was bullshit, but trying to act with "abundance" attitude I just left.

​

After this my success rate with picking up women went downwards. Girls smell desperation, and I was desperate to get another kiss. The worst thing is that I could not get the girl I kissed out of my mind. It was fucking oneitis coming onto me again, even after being friend-zoned for 2 years and seeing her kissing other guys. I really did not understand. This killed my vibe and started acting like the 15 year old bitch I was.

​

Personally, I identified two things that triggered this mentality.

Number one: We had chemistry.

The other 3 girls I picked up were cute, but I was not into them as I was for this girl. I guess it was that she was more into me and had great coordination dancing.

​

Number two: She was not bullshiting

I put her phone on my pocket because she did not have anywhere to put it. She was constantly asking for it, and I just ignored it. Finally, when she got angry I accepted and gave it to her. I thought she would go, but she stayed.

​

Honestly, I think I made a mistake by taking action when she wanted to look for her friend. I should have taken her to other place or dance more. This is what crossed my mind all time the rest of the party. In a positive way, it made me identify my lack of self-confidence of rationalizing about all this bullshit, right? Who gives a shit if I did not take action. There are plenty of girls.

​

Anyways, I also discovered I prefer to game and hookup with 1 hot girl I have chemistry with, than kiss or hookup with 5 random girls I am not into.

​

In a negative way, I still have my blue pilled, fearful personality in me I must detach.

​

My question is: With the example above, how would you have responded and how the fuck do I prevent this oneitis to come again in a situation like this?

​

​