So I am a 19 year old guy, and I've been dating this girl for around 1 month, even though she had exams we made it work to plan out dates. We have our little discussions and ignore sessions but she shows enough signs that she likes me a lot (videochatting during the day or her study break, sending pictures of us togheter, telling me she's starting to like me too much).

So yeah, first time we tried to fuck, I couldn't get it up. Because I used some drug before that. Next time I couldn't get hard enough because I already wanked and drank some beers. So she told my, is it my body blablbla, I am like naah, prob watched to much porn or something. So then this happend, she made a stupid fucking discussion out of something, so I started to ignore her, and was so pissed I decided to go with one mate to an epic party pretty far away, and take disco biscuits. I tried to talk to her the next day but she wasn't having none of it, so then we ignored eachother and 2 hours she finally cracked, she asked me if I wanted to come to her dorm. So I said yes, we had sex kind off. But my dick was flacid she knew it was of the things I took at the party, but kept saying is it my body??

Alright so next friday, we had a party and I took viagra with me, because I didn't wanna fuck up. Short story short, went to the toilets with a friend of her, and I told him I had viagra with me because I didn't want to take no risks. That night when we left the club she told me she wanted to sleep, so I didn't take shit. But I was already pretty horny because of some substance, me not jerking for 3 days and taking zinc and being drunk. That night I was really touchy and shit and she didn't want it.

1 week later, she sends me a message out of nowhere, "I am disgusted by you, Don't want contact with you any more, you brought down my self image", all that stuff.

Ofc she thinks I took it because I was really touchy. But I have proven her wrong by showing her a screenshot of my chat with the boys. She's pretty mad and I don't think I am coming back after this. Should I just sent her a straight up apology letter? Me and my mates find it pretty funny but I really like this one, but probably the thought of me having viagra on me disgusts her.

Cliffs:

Multiple times can't get hard because of substances

Take viagra with me in case, after a party but didn't take it

She heard from someone I had viagra with me

She's disgusted and wants no contact

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Notes: she wants no contact, but I am still not fully blocked, she keeps sending messages after I dead text her.