Hi, my name is L and today i would like to tell you my problem. I would like to hear your solutions for my little problems.

Before i begin, i have to thank you guys, this thread on reddit probably saved my life -- http://www.reddit.com/r/SuicideWatch/comments/2pgstp/thats_what_they_change_me_into/ -- some background for you

Anyway now to my problem. In past three weeks i have read everything i could found about game and things related to that. I want to change. So i went out and started to approach the girls. Well..most of time i fucked up hard. It were like the most awkward conversations ever. But anyway one time i had success, this nice girl will go on date will me this friday.

Now we get to the bottom of the problem. All the time i've got this question which just flows through my head. "Do you really want it?" And the answer is in fact simple yes or no. But i am not capable of that answer, i just get weird feeling and thats it. I just kind of feel that i am not ready for anything what might come if it worked(i mean that date). I am literally fucked up mentally(I speak with myself sometimes(I spoke with myself more in the past :)

TLDR:I am fucked up mentally and cant decide if should go on a date.

NOTE:I have noticed that not everything that works(or seems to work) in US simply doesnt work in Czech republic. :)