[FR] First time out - 5 approaches, feedback needed

JustinMcSlappy · 2013-11-17T15:42:22+00:00

You approached a hot bartender at work. She has seen this happen a million times. You did good by testing her mentally with the photo questions but asking another guy in the bar what he thought while you are standing there with your arm around her was not a good play. She should have been your only focus. At that point, I would have thanked her for the drinks and asked to see her on her night off. Give her your number and leave her alone the rest of the night.

As for the married chicks, that was a losing battle from the start. Even if one of them wanted to do something with you, she wouldn't do it in front of her friend for fear of the husband finding out. In this situation, I would have attempted to isolate the one you wanted from the friend for a few minutes. Pull her aside and tell her that you don't care if she's married and would like to do something after the club without her friend. She has to uphold the good married girl image in front of her friend. (This has worked for me many times)

You are trying pretty hard to get in there, pick up women and have sex with them before the night is over. I think you need to take a couple steps back and focus on just talking to women, instead of taking them home.

You have a confidence issue if you can't approach women that are near big or buff guys. I don't know how to help you there. The military trained me how to project confidence in any situation and I don't know how to explain it. Its mostly an act, almost like an alter ego that comes out around women.

Getting out and actually meeting people to learn body language and how to spot a woman that is attracted to you is the hardest part. Keep going out there and doing it.

O3EAN · 2013-11-17T20:45:15+00:00

Sounds like you were incongruent, you would have done better if you were more honest about your intentions by using SOI's instead of using lines and things like the cube, I'm guessing the two girls on the dance floor rejected you because you lied about liking the song in order to try and create a connection which would have come off as weird unless you actually loved the song, no big deal dude just drop the lines, be honest with your intentions and remember to physically escalate and lead.

Gustavomb · 2013-11-18T00:29:35+00:00

I'm a newbie, too. I haven't closed anything but I'm working from the bottom, with aggressive approaches and pushing to stay in sets as long as I can. While I could give you advice about how to do all of those things, it wouldn't be genuine since I've only really done this a few times.

However, I've had good success with dance floor game in the past, several times. It was something I kinda did even before I knew about this whole community/art. The secret is just to go for it and do not hesitate even for a second. Example: I was on the dance floor the other night and immediately saw this girl with a drink in her hand swaying back and forth. I grabbed her other hand and spun her around, danced on her a little bit, grabbed her and spun her away to grind on her for a bit - all in front of her friends. Grinding always looks SO STUPID from a 3rd party standpoint, but it's different when you're actually doing it.

Do you have to grab the girl and pull her toward you exactly the same way I did? Absolutely not. You can sidle up to her and ask her to dance (which I have also done on occasion). You can even talk for a bit away from the dance floor and lead her there later. Your description is vague but from the way you keep mentioning you're a bad dancer I wouldn't be surprised if the way you danced up to these girls was awkward and sheepish, and probably more responding than leading. That's also important, with dancing as well as most other elements of pickup you must LEAD. Have her respond to your dance moves. And stop that shit about you not being able to dance. All those other guys at the bar standing on the sidelines holding drinks or awkwardly shifting around the floor, they can't dance. They're playing it safe and as a result they're fucking lame. You, however, are the fucking KING. People from all around the world have come to this bar just to catch a glimpse of you dancing, and the mere sight of such an event will impregnate a girl. Believe it. Internalize it. People will love you and think you're an amazing dancer because, deep down, you know you are.

That being said, it doesn't hurt to learn a few moves. I would suggest basic pop and lock - aka, the arm wave, body wave, and basic beat hits. These are pretty easy to learn and can boost your confidence since you know you've got moves. However, this is far from necessary, as this entire conflict is completely in your head.

Title	[FR] First time out - 5 approaches, feedback needed
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	18
Comments	11
Date	November 17, 2013 2:39 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1qtonx/fr_first_time_out_5_approaches_feedback_needed/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/fr-first-time-out-5-approaches-feedback-needed.1361676 https://theredarchive.com/post/1361676

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