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[–]somethingawfu1 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (22 children) | Copy Link
Don't make women uncomfortable at work.
[–]somethingawfu1 3 points4 points5 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Actually, don't make women uncomfortable period.
[–]rochefort369 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (20 children) | Copy Link
Yo I’m looking for responses from pimps not cucks ;) but yes I agree
[–]somethingawfu1 2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (19 children) | Copy Link
You want responses from individuals responsible for renting out women by the hour?
Listen fella- I am a lady, who has "picked up" a lot of ladies and never once have I had to pull some dumbass shit like you're proposing.
If you see a woman at work that you had a pleasent interaction with, the way to stand a chance without coming off as predatory and generally awful, would be to become a regular, have pleasent conversation with her without detracting from work, and then one day approach her with something like, "Hey. I see you here a lot. I know our interactions have been brief, but I would love to get to know you sometime outside of work. My name is /blank and my number is /blank.
And then expect nothing. Silence is your answer. Never approach the subject again, unless she chooses to act on it.
Lastly. Don't be a creep.
[–]STD_Tyler -1 points0 points1 point 6 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link
So if I see a girl I like in a cafe, I keep buying coffee and cookies for 1-2 weeks, then ask her out!? And you don't call this stalking and preying?
Do you also guarantee she will work there forever? There is a possibility that you will never see her again
[–]somethingawfu1 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Stalking in my mind would be following her home, learning her schedule, making fake accounts to try and follow her without disclosing your identity... dangerous things.
Going to a public place and being a consumer of the product that place sells, being respectful and friendly and, again, direct, when the time comes that you want to ask her out doesn't seem predatory to me. It could BECOME predatory if you, or the man in question, doesn't take no for an answer and/or has a very negative reaction to rejection, should she reject your advance. I firmly believe people are allowed to shoot their shot once. Repeated attempts after a no, however, does become harassment.
[–]somethingawfu1 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (15 children) | Copy Link
And obviously she may not work there forever lol, duh. That's life though, isn't it? Sometimes things don't work out- sometimes they do. If you don't want to wait the initial rapport period there's no hard line in the sand that says you have to.
I'm saying, as a woman who dates women, that your chances are better if she trusts you and has some sort of rapport with you. Therefore, building up that slight bit of rapport each time you go to this hypothetical place of business helps increase your chances of success.
Just leaving your name and number is fine too- so long as you understand that she may not want it, use it, or think positively about the advance and that that's okay.
[–]STD_Tyler 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
Yes my chances may be better if I keep buying coffee from her for 1 month and she recognises me. But this slow strategy can be good if she is the last woman on earth.
With thousands of women on Tinder and on the streets, no girl is worth all this planning and time.
I just go tell her "hi" in the moment, if she likes me everything will work, if she doesn't like me, no amount of coffee or muffins I buy will work. That's how cold approach work.
[–]somethingawfu1 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
You're playing a numbers game as opposed to treating women like people. You can do that- sure, but you'll miss out on connection and intimacy and will end up, at worst, with harassment charges and be no better off than where you are now and at best, adding a couple of one night stands to your belt. 🤷♀️
I've "picked up" a lot of women. I've had casual sex with a lot of women. I'm friends with most of these women to this day. There's no resentment, there is no expectation of what comes next, I don't have a bad reputation as a creep, a perv, etc... but take whatever approach you like, I guess. Figured I would share whats always worked for me, without contributing to the general harassment women experiencd day in and day out.
[–]STD_Tyler 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
What harassment are you talking about? Saying Hi to one woman or 1000 women is not harassment. If they don't like me I leave, and I always keep polite even if they are rude.
And yes, it is a numbers game. Doing 10-20 approaches per day is better than 3 approaches in so many levels.
But yes, obviously you have a different method so lets agree to disagree, happy hunting :D
[–]somethingawfu1 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
That's good! I'm glad you don't press if they don't seem interested. A lot of men will continue to push though, which is where harassment potentially comes into play.
I suppose if your goal is sex, sure, but sex alone pr viewing each of your approaches like a conquest is a... pretty ridiculous and empty way of valuing or viewing human relationships, my guys. Women aren't prey to be hunted. I guess some of your phrasing and terminology is a bit concerning.
[–]STD_Tyler 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I am aware of your feminist views so that's why I used "Happy hunting" as sarcasm. You honestly need to relax online a little bit. You really sound provoked for no reason...
[–]rochefort369 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Ok I’m saying it. You’re projecting like crazy. I have empathy for the girl, read my post. No one here is being predatory. Keep your issues to yourself and stop trying to solidify a victim narrative where all men who are direct and honest in their intention are predatory, we have enough approach anxiety and empathy already, thanks.
What? Did you read everything? I'm not accusing anyone here of being predatory- dude asked a question and I gave my perspective.
And.. also, I specifically said that I believe that all people should be able to shoot their shoot once? No harm in that as far as I'm concerned. I think its YOU that's projecting, friend.
[–]somethingawfu1 -1 points0 points1 point 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Also- if you have ASPD you have issues with feeling empathy, correct? Or am I misunderstanding that diagnosis?
[–]rochefort369 -1 points0 points1 point 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Lol stalker. I have very high cognitive empathy . Bruh moment right here fellas.
[–]somethingawfu1 -1 points0 points1 point 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I'm a stalker by reading public information you willingly published?
I'm glad you identify as having high cognitive empathy, but calling me names and deflecting isn't demonstrating that trait very well.
[–]rochefort369 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Bruh...
[–]rochefort369 -1 points0 points1 point 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Loool thanks
[–]quinnmcd[M] [score hidden] 6 years ago stickied comment (0 children) | Copy Link
This post had to be taken down because it appears to be focused on a specific situation or person. While Field Reports deal with specific situations and people, remember that the focus is different:
No worries though! Though the thread has been taken down, any conversations you have started here can still continue, and if you want to PM a mod to get their opinion on this thread, feel free to do so and they will still be able to weigh in.
For next time, remember that posts about a specific situational advice with a specific person are fine as field should be directed to Ask Seddit (/r/askseddit), not to be confused with Ask Reddit.
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[–]somethingawfu1 1 point2 points3 points (22 children) | Copy Link
[–]somethingawfu1 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]rochefort369 0 points1 point2 points (20 children) | Copy Link
[–]somethingawfu1 2 points3 points4 points (19 children) | Copy Link
[–]STD_Tyler -1 points0 points1 point (17 children) | Copy Link
[–]somethingawfu1 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]somethingawfu1 0 points1 point2 points (15 children) | Copy Link
[–]STD_Tyler 0 points1 point2 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]somethingawfu1 0 points1 point2 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]STD_Tyler 0 points1 point2 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]somethingawfu1 0 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]STD_Tyler 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]rochefort369 0 points1 point2 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]somethingawfu1 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]somethingawfu1 -1 points0 points1 point (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]rochefort369 -1 points0 points1 point (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]somethingawfu1 -1 points0 points1 point (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]rochefort369 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]rochefort369 -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]quinnmcd[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children) | Copy Link