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[–]Catch11 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
I'm gonna tell you right now, having been where you've been and being someone who used to approach all the time. Getting a number doesn't mean shit if you guys didn't make a special connection. It's not really your fault, you guys just didn't get along well enough. Not everyone can form a connection like that off the street. And by everyone I'm not implying some guys can. What i mean is that certain people get along better with certain other people regardless of how one person tries to approach the situation. My suggestion if you want to get along with more people is just workout and meditate and naturally you will find more people get along with you, because you give off a stronger calmer energy. But no matter how much you improve there will still be plenty of girls you cant connect with. Just like there are plenty of guys you can't be friends with.
[–]2Siders 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
I see, so I'm on the right track at the moment. I do both working out and meditation. Though I suck at meditation as you can imagine.
Since you've been there and done it Catch11, could you tell me your methods of creating a special connection? You know how on campus everybody asks the same questions? "What course/year/nationality..." I suppose that is NOT the way of making the convo interesting and creating a connection.
[–]Catch11 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago* (6 children) | Copy Link
I'll give you some tips on making a special connection but I honestly feel like your looking for a shortcut which doesnt exist meditation will help you far more than any little tricks.Yeah meditation is hard, moving meditation makes it a bit easier if you focus on the movement and your energy flowing through your body. Also that fact meditation is hard is how you know it's good for you. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-E9vJFAj98 I do that everyday, i try to do it in the mornings but sometimes i end up doing it before bed, whats important is to do it everyday so it becomes a habit.
Ok now about methods of creating a special connection....hmmmm. I wouldn't say there are methods because you can only form them with the right people. But i guess the appropriate method would be to get a person in a situation where you guys can both be comfortable and open to each other. hmmmm also like, if you pretend you already have a special connection with them that can help ease things up. For example lets say you have a best friend, and you guys are out on the quad and you see something really funny another person is doing. You would probably crack a joke about it. Just do that with a random person and see where it goes. Connections are formed from chemistry of personality not interview questions. So like, just talk about stuff in your surroundings or things you find interesting you think the other person would too. I don't know if I'm getting my point across properly. I'm basically saying put you and the person you want to connect with in a situation where you can both talk openly about random stuff. If you have any more questions just ask.
p.s. if your already working out and meditating i would suggest cutting unhealthy foods out of your diet :). That also helps your inner emotions too!
p.s.s. Im trying to remember a time when I got a girls number through talking about random stuff....well a few days ago I saw a girl talking on the phone walking in the same direction as me. She was loudly saying "i dont know what i want for dinner" so i said "theres a lot of grass around here". She laughed and said something back which i couldnt understand and i asked "what?" and she said "im only joking" After she got off the phone a few moments later I asked "Did you think i was trying to sell you weed." (i genuinely was curious) to which she responded with an inviting smile and said,"i thought you were trying to ask me on a date". I laughed it off because she wasn't really my type, but she was decently cute.
[–]2Siders 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Thanks, I did the Energy Training and I'll try to practice meditation more in the future. Whilst writing this I was thinking. Even if I'm unable to create a deep connection initially, if I get the number and get the girl out for a coffee I can create that connection then I think. So I shouldn't reveal my true intentions until I'm there in person and have created a mutual attraction?
[–]Catch11 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link
Excellent. I'm glad to hear you are trying new things. What are your true intentions? Also I want to thoroughly ingrain this in you, you can't "create" a special connection. Through interaction it's either revealed or it isn't. Ben Franklin didn't create electricity. He discovered it (:. I would say that if you feel comfortable asking them. "what are you doing this weekend" They respond "nothing" and you say "do you want to get something to drink" if they say yes, that means you have already established some type of connection.
p.s. if they say "im doing this blablablabla" you can always say "oh okay thats fun i was just wondering because i was gonna ask if you want to get something to drink (or coffee whatever)."
[–]2Siders 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
My true intentions is just literally I want to have sex. And even though I like to consider myself as a bold and very honest guy, saying that straight out would just undermine my interaction. But you might have different experiences idk.
[–]Catch11 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Well if you're true intentions are purely for sex you should just get a prostitute, or find a girl looking purely for sex. Tricking a girl into having sex because you are desperate is beneath you. Unless you mean you just want to have sex with a specific girl. In that case hiding your intentions is pointless, they will ALWAYS know. Unless you refuse to look them in the eyes.
[–]2Siders 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
My mentality and this is what I tell girls as well is: I'm not looking for anything serious atm, but if I found the right girl I would be a fool not to get into a relationship.
I just don't understand how it's so hard to find sex on campus without committing yourself to an almost marriage.
[–]Catch11 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
if you want easy sex go to an art school. Im guessing you go to a school where people there aren't into easy sex. Your in the wrong pond bro.
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Personally, I think you just rushed a little bit. It is possible that the approach you did was not 'deep' enough, and she got little idea of who you were. You just jumped straight into seduction by telling her she was pretty, without building mutual attraction. What is more, as she said, 'she isn't interesting in seeing anyone atm' means that she is NOT going on a date with you. I would say that is a sign that you should just move on. I know it may not sound ideal, but you should carry on and find someone who will be ready to date.
[–]2Siders 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I never understood properly how I'm supposed to do a quick approach and convey that I'm attracted to the girl to not establish a friendly sort of vibe, but more of a man-to-woman kind of thing. When it comes to online game and texting, I can be witty and convey value and attraction properly, but that isn't a quick interaction.
It's almost like I just had revelation. Don't compliment until you built mutual attraction. I know I'm a nooby, sorry.
[–]Catch11 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I wanted to jump into this comment thread as well....cause the way your thinking is exactly how I used to think. "build attraction etc." Don't worry about building attraction or complimenting, just remember shes only a human so you feel comfortable and talk about whatever comes to mind, if you dont supress your attraction for her then you wont fall into the mythical "friend zone" -which i dont really think is real i just think people dont understand that to be more than friends you just have to flirt and have chemistry-. She's not a robot who you can input things into to get a desired outcome.
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
No need to be sorry at all. I can give you some tips.
First, try to find some time and read a little bit about pick up. Read: 'Mystery method'. I think it will answer most of the questions, from the founder of the pickup. Basically, 'Mystery Method' is considered to be a Bible of pick up. Secondly, watch some videos on YouTube from these guys:Tom Torrero, Richard La Ruina and RSD Max. Personally, I learned a lot from them, as they cover almost every single topic regarding PUA.
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[–]Catch11 1 point2 points3 points (8 children) | Copy Link
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