When dating a girl, we all know we need to escalate into physical contact and later sex. But with online dating becoming increasingly popular, I think an important point we don't read about often is remote escalation.

When I first started meeting women online, my target was always getting a date, with the purpose of starting from there into the expected escalation process. So I tried to be funny, interesting, etc. online and then have a typical first date.

But then I realized first dates where usually difficult: the situation is pretty cold and you need some experience to handle the scene. Most of the time I got to nothing.

Another problem with getting those dates too soon is you find the girl is distant and too shy. Getting anywhere with those girls can be challenging.

I got into the idea of remote escalation by chance. I was dating a girl but still have contact with other girls from a dating site. Because I liked the girl I was dating, I wasn't so interested in proper first dates with new women. So I decided to try to get as far as possible before physically meeting those girls - and because I was seeing someone, I wasn't needy at all - I wanted to do it just for fun.

I had great success with this approach. Somehow because I am good as writing - in my own language - and I think because women love to fantasy and being part of a tale. So the main goal is to get into a date with as much points as possible.

With one girl I got a great connection, but I suggested the idea to meet and behave like if we already were a couple. While chatting, we made a lot of jokes and possible scenarios: e.g. having dinner at our favourite restaurant, going later to our house. She was really eager to talk about this fictional relationship and develop details of how our live as a couple was.

The point is we settle a date who started with a long kiss. I was amazed it were so simple. She totally bought the relationship history and somehow loved the idea of a really different first date. Starting from this point, was easy to F close the same night.

With another girl I chatted briefly and started to develop how I would do in our first date. Apparently women love this stuff! But I went very straight into a kinky situation. She was enjoying it and wanted more and more. Basically is telling a dirty history but the characters are her and you. She liked very much but had to go and I never found her again in the chat room. So I decided to gamble and propose a really bold date, full of details, in a long email. Announcing beforehand we I will have very dominant sex, etc. I was surprised, but she answered really interested, we prepared it for a couple of weeks and it was supposed to be my slut for a night.

I am on my late 30's so maybe with very young women this is going to be harder, but from my experience, age is not a big difference on techniques: they are either good or bad, no matter how old the girl is.

With this girl I was kissing and touching everywhere in a public place in less than five minutes. She was dressed in a specific way I requested. At the end she felt afraid of doing it, and the date ended without much more. Strangely we ended having a date in a conventional way a few weeks later - drinks, dinner, taking her home, F close. In this case, dating her was almost guarantee of having the expected end.

Another case: chatting with a woman, I felt she was interested but I behave aloof. Suggested dinner at my place, joking about my culinary expertise. Having a first date at home is a great advance over the Starbucks date, but I pushed harder - I am talking about several days, slowly growing expectations - joking about the dessert. Finally it was clear the plan was having dinner and later sex. I never pushed too much, but kept increasing the escalation with small suggestions. Not sure how, I pointed I am more "energetic" on the mornings, and the romantic dinner became a breakfast and later having fun. I met her in a bar where I had had several unsuccessfully conventional first dates.

Another trick from this date: I made escalation part of a symbols game - women love this. Included the chance she was rejected if I don't liked her, to play with her insecurities. So if I said "I must go I have work to do" it means I was rejecting her and nothing will happen. If she didn't liked me, she should insist in paying and freely go. But I made her to physically represent sealing the deal: she should go to the toilets and giving me his underwear.

Probably this sounds like a troll/fiction, but I promise it just work this way and so simply. They feel comfortable planning all this at home, fantasizing, masturbating on the idea. Some women are really bold and expect fun and new experiences. The key is showing: she can scape the situation any time. You are a nice guy. It is going to be real fun. You don't this with everybody, just her. The date is going to be really unique.

With this last girl I got the underwear and later realized she was a slut. It is really sad when you go for a boring coffee date with one of this girls you could have sex so easily. Probably that is a reason why some of those standard dates just doesn't work: she expected more adventure.

Some general tips, from my experience - I haven't read much about this online and I am far from an player:

Talk about the way she should be dressed at the date. Ask for heels, sexy lingerie, make up, etc. She will argue and complain but most of the time will accept some of your suggestions. It is part of the fun.

Go into deep details and highlight how unusual and far from what I have done before this is going to be. Make her feel special.

Keep escalating until the sex scene appears. Depends on the woman, but mentioning what could happen if you have sex is a must.

Use symbolic language. They love this. Specific actions means intentions. You can use this as a help on your escalation. E.g. black panties means you will have a blowjob - if sex ever happens. If she complains (she is thinking on something on her closet), you can make an exception but only if she is wearing suspenders: she feels like she won but you got more kinky underwear without much effort. Have symbols for her being rejected, so she will be anxious of this potentially happening.

Play for long. You can start with the idea of meeting each other without underwear. Talk about this in detail, develop the situation. And then you can include an extra: if you get an erection you will have to be dressed like this for 24 hours. Enjoy the possibilities, then what happens if she is excited. Develop. You give each other the clothes so no one is cheating. Develop. If she want to recover her panties, it will be at your place. Develop.

Hope you have insightful points about this kind of escalation, I think is a theme we never read about here and from my experience, it can be really productive.