Self Actualization

Hello all fellow sedditors, I am a bit of a lurker and this is the first time I have ever really posted anything. I'm going to preface this with the fact that I usually hate reading similar things on this subreddit that I am about to write because I never saw very much value to myself in the posts. But I think maybe actually writing it down just makes it feel like it mattered because I can at least tell someone else about it. So I thank this community for that opportunity. So here it goes, I had a very serious moment of self reflection today. It has a little to do with the fact I just turned 23 and I'm not really where I want to be. I envisioned myself having already graduated from college and being just an all around more successful person, in the ways I wanted to be successful anyways. Including being more successful with women.

Now I'm talking about this because in my self reflection I realized the things I put importance on are the things that I feel challenge me. I think that is one of the great things about my personality and I think that is the great thing about this community. I think it is the challenge that drives many of us. Learning ways to get what we want out of life, not just from women but to be more successful in every facet of our lives. I know that I want to learn seduction because it is hard. It is hard to put yourself out there in the face of rejection. We will all fail, that is just the way it is. No matter what we do we will all fail, If we don't fail we didn't push ourselves hard enough. We went for the lady that we knew we could get , just so we wouldn't have to face the rejection. But this community goes beyond that we challenge ourselves to learn something that isn't easy. We all have our different reasons for being among this community. But I think the people of this community have gotten a bad image for trying to get the most of out of life. Yes, we may be shallow and people may think that learning these kind of techniques is slimy.
But I don't think that is what we are about, I think deep down we all know why were here. To be better than we are, everyday we can be better. By pushing ourselves, that is the only way we can become better people. Through countless rejections, through countless let downs, through countless failures. Through these devices we become masters of our fates. And that is what is special about this community, your drive to get what you want out of life. No matter what it takes, No one can stop you from achieving what you want. If we all push ourselves everyday we can become greater than we ever thought we could be. I for one am tired of the social standard that failure is not socially acceptable. Why should we be shamed if we struck out with a girl or failed a class or didn't live up someone else's standard. We learn from those experiences and we should never hide them and wear as proudly as our success'. I am proud of this community and everyone who had a chance to read this, because I know that you are trying to improve yourself.
Now, I for one am a lurker of this community and I have not pushed myself hard enough to improve my "game" or to improve my life. I am all talk and no action, I have huge approach anxiety and I cannot push myself to risk failures. Which, if I don't change soon I will regret for the rest of my life and so will the other people of this community if you do not take action now. I realize many of you here are doing your part to improve your lives daily. But, I am here on the part of everyone who isn't. I will admit to all my failures and I am here to say that I accept them and will start making real changes to take risks and be willing to face rejection and failure from anyone. Because this community doesn't take shit from anyone and as apart of it. Neither should I!

"Only those who risk greatly, can ever achieve greatly"-RFK.
Now lets get to Self Actualization, is defined as follows. The only drive by which the life of an organism is determined. At any moment the organism has the fundamental tendency to actualize all its capacities, its whole potential, as it is present in exactly that moment, and in exactly that situation in contact with the world under the given circumstances.

Self Actualization is a goal we are constantly striving for gentleman. We all make mistakes and we all cut short our potential at some point. But we are not about our pasts and we our about our potential. I hope everyone in this community gets a chance to have self actualization and realize that you became the best version of yourself that you could possible be. I pray that you take your opportunities when given them and you push yourself everyday. I have memorized what self actualization is and I am going to strive for it everyday and I hope that everyone in this community joins me. I realize this was long, but I hope you enjoyed reading it. I also hope this makes an impact in someone's life. I appreciate all of you and what I have received from this community.

[–]thatsweatykid 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I first came to r/seduction when I was stuck on "that one girl" that I wanted but couldn't have. I lurked for a couple weeks, got pissed at all the advice (move on, oneitis, etc.) And quit coming back. Slowly I did just that, I got over that girl. I proceeded to come back to this subreddit with a much more open mind. I went a full year without "liking" another girl. Instead, I used a combination of this subreddits (and others, including r/MFA, and r/fitness) to improve myself. I networked. I befriended girls. I worked out. I became what I wanted to be. I internalized much of the underlying messages behind posts, and solidified my inner game. I have only recently been applying my skills, but as a senior in high school I'm finding my my options for application to be limited. Much of high school is about social circle game, which I am now working on. Nevertheless I still work in what I learn from this subreddit. Just recently, I wrote an essay for my class regarding the concept of self-actualization. This subreddit has been THE single most important piece to the puzzle in my transformation. It has changed the way I think and feel about all daily interactions. I read between the lines of what people say, and have become far less sensitive. Far more open and genuine. Far more vulnerable. But in that vulnerability I find I am able to form closer friendships and relationships with friends, teachers, coworkers, etc. I am coming closer to reaching my potential everyday. This subreddit has challenged me in ways I couldn't have imagined. But through these struggles I come out stronger and closer to being self-actualized. I feel lucky to have found this subreddit so early in my life (16) because I still have time to learn and form new habits that will lead me to being more successful not just with women, but in life. I not only understand the meaning of this post, but I can relate to it. I am thrilled to see I am not the only one that has felt this way about this subreddit. OP is right, this subreddit gets such a bad rap at times, but the simple fact that it has helped me so much will forever make me love and appreciate it. Thanks for this post OP.

Title	Self Actualization
Author	PhoenixAwoken34
Upvotes	7
Comments	1
Date	September 15, 2014 10:52 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/2gg609/self_actualization/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/self-actualization.1376610 https://theredarchive.com/post/1376610

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