I almost don’t want to post this, because I know my Captain reads, and it’ll be giving up some secrets. 
But I guess I know all about game, so it’s only fair, right?
I still struggle with submissiveness outside the bedroom. It’s going against many years of ingrained habits. I usually immediately acquiesce to whatever reasonable thing he asks, but sometimes I can be rather begrudging about it if I’m in a bad mood. I’ve improved, though. Instead of opening my mouth and saying something snarky, I turn my head and roll my eyes, but still comply. And I really don’t even do it consciously! It’s not like he asks me to do a lot, but if I’m particularly tired and irritated with the kids for the day, I have to stop myself from being a total bitch. I’ve been pretty stressed and physically exhausted lately, so it’s been a real struggle to make myself a person that my family would want to be around.
Something that has helped me is to try to put myself in a submissive position in relation to whatever he’s doing. Very, very subtle, but if I’m consciously trying to do it, it puts me in a better mindset. For so long, our marriage was a huge power struggle, and now that it’s not, I have to let go of the old habit of trying to “win” completely unimportant situations.
He sits at the head of the table and I sit to his side, but that’s something he’d started to do on his own. I believe that’s covered in the MMSL primer, to take ownership of the dominant position at the table. Pretty effective. If you’re running the female version of the MAP (the FAP.. hah, that always makes me laugh), think of nudging him over to the head of the table. I don’t know what you do if your table is round. 
When we’re sitting next to each other, I try to sit lower by leaning on him. I try to melt into him a little, and he puts his arm protectively around me. Going back to something I reposted a while ago, if we’re walking together, I slip my arm through his so I can be led along wherever we’re going. When we hug, I keep my arms down around his waste so his arms can envelope me totally. If we’re lying down cuddling, I lay lower, with my head near his chest, in the crook of his arm. Some of this stuff I was doing before anyway, but I approach the situation with a mindset of purposefully making myself submissive.
One thing I haven’t tried is something that was suggested in a thread over at MMSL. We haven’t had a serious enough chat that I’ve needed to pull it out, and the idea is still a little awkward to me, but as one poster opined, it’s ridiculously effective:
A few weeks ago I was mad at (my wife) and in a very bad mood. After dinner I did not even want to talk to her. After some MMSL advice she came to me and put herself in a physically submissive position. (I was sitting in a living room chair so she placed herself on the floor between my legs, sitting on her knees facing me.) I suddenly was able to talk to her about my feelings and bring some of my walls down but was still not ready to let go of being hurt and angry. Following more MMSL advice she stayed where she was and silently lowered her head and looked at the floor. Within two minutes I was compelled to reach out and begin petting the back of her head after five to ten minutes of this I felt forgiveness for her, sorrow for my part of the ordeal, a reinstated affection and emotional connection, and a somewhat confusing but powerful friskiness.
I had been gamed.
Strangely, not only did I not mind it, I liked it. I did not know at the time that she had been coached. It was not until I read her threads later that I put two and two together and that I understood the power of submissive positioning. She was worried that after I found out I had been “played” I would be mad again. To the contrary, I was happy with her for two reasons. I was impressed that she would lower herself physically to show submission to me. Also, I was weirdly still sexually aroused by her display for more than a week even though it was not overtly sexual in and of itself.
How great is that? Instead of becoming more and more defensive, she simply changed her position in relation to him, lowered her eyes, and remained calm. Nearly instant diffusion, quicker reconciliation and even arousal.
But what guy wouldn’t get aroused by a woman between his legs? Hmmmm.
