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rkelley728 Archive

View 1 post and 32 comments by rkelley728 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
11

ADVICErkelley728/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 02:02 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

The simple fact that it's considered a privilege says a lot about the current state of society. My upbringing was farrrrrr from that which you speak of. My Dad went to jail went I was 2, got back out when I was 5 and then my mom left him (and us kids) right after he got out. My dad raised us as a single parent from then on. I turned out decent albeit a bit emotionally fucked up but my brother is a heroin addict, over 5 years now. I don't think anyone should ever feel guilty about situations (goo…
/r/RedPillWives12/02/17 02:08 AM
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Thanks for sharing! I really enjoyed reading this. I was raised solely by my father and grew up with a brother 3 years younger than me. In hindsight, I've struggled with my masculine side being more dominant my whole life. I never realized the consequences of it until I found RP.
/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 05:55 PM
3

Maybe in your head you think the sex level should be something that it never will be. I dearly hope that isn't the case! But this actually made me reflect more, it's not actually the physical act of sex I'm after. Like you said, I can get myself off just fine with my vibrator :-P It's the bond it creates and feeling desired by my husband.
/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 04:53 PM
2

Now, that's an idea... ;)
/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 04:06 PM
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Thank you, every word hit the nail on the head. Especially this... Patience is the name of the game. You aren't only trying to create sexual tension, you are also working to repair years of damage and neglect (for both of you). I am probably doing and expecting too much, too fast. I just kinda feel like we've already wasted so many years in this state, I can't stand to waste anymore. But repairing deep multi-faceted issues like these, doesn't just happen at the snap of your fingers. Unfortunatel…
/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 03:58 PM
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Thank you! I am truly here for self improvement and appreciate the opportunity. RP is still somewhat new to me so please be gentle lol. I've read a ton about it but knowing the theories and then actually incorporating them into everyday life is two different things. I feel like I have a good understanding in my mind but I'm having difficulties making it actionable. I know I said this is another post, but I truly wish I could have a little RPW coach in my ear 24/7 lol.
/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 03:46 PM
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I definitely try but have the grace of an awkward 17 year old. It does feel forced and a bit unnatural. I feel like I have taken on the mans role in this situation. Like I'm chasing and pursuing him and thats probably how my "flirting" comes off. And I'm pretty sure its only contributing to the issue.
/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 03:36 PM
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Yeah, I do actually. I feel like its been so long, I don't know how to 'foreplay' or 'flirt'. How sad is that?! Honestly, it all feels so awkward like being a teenager all over again. I've lost the art of subtle innuendos it seems.
/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 03:31 PM
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You need to get the mental closeness back; it sounds like you two are strangers, and you are trying to basically have physical closeness without connecting it to emotion, and that is not working. Get the loving feelings back first. You're right. I feel like we have improved here but it is possible that for him, it just isn't where he needs it to be. And that is perfectly fine. Thank you for the reminder.
/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 03:00 PM
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It happened after I just joined the group. I had made a couple posts, one of which didn't go over well. I got banned and deleted my posts. So while there were several posts deleted, the cause was one single incident. The moderators talked to me and kindly let me rejoin the group.
/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 02:58 PM
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Well I would suggest always making it clear you are receptive. That doesnt mean initiating That seems to be the huge disconnect for me. I'm having a hard time breaking the habit of initiating in an aggressive way. We do cuddle and touch a lot. It just seems the sex aspect is the last missing puzzle piece to get our marriage back on track. While we have made improvements, I just want to make sure I am doing the right things.
/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 02:55 PM
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That only happened one time when I first joined the group. I ask for help because I do genuinely want help and to learn more about incorporating RP ways into myself and marriage.
/r/RedPillWives09/02/17 02:51 PM
2

Thanks for sharing! We have gone through a period of "male-caused dead bedroom" pre-RP. Actually we are still on the mend from it. This is a great reminder! Sometimes I wish I could have a little RP coach in my ear 24/7 lol.
/r/RedPillWives06/02/17 08:10 PM
3

We just moved here a few months ago so haven't really had the opportunity. I have no issues doing that but would prefer finding someone through word of mouth if that makes sense. We had a bad experience with care .com at our last duty station.
/r/RedPillWives31/01/17 11:52 AM
1

All of these sound fabulous! We need to get into a regular date night schedule. It has always been something that's lacking for is. Military life makes it overly difficult, no family to watch our kiddos and good friends are few and far between. Seems like whenever we get close enough to another family we can trade babysitting with, one of us ends up moving. I miss going out with the hubs! He's getting ready to deploy though so hopefully by the time he gets back, I'll be settled in enough to our …
/r/RedPillWives30/01/17 04:57 PM
2

Idk.... I want to believe it. There's a certain allure to the notion a simpler more traditional life brings more happiness. But it hasn't been the case for me. In fact, I've never felt more unfilled than the last 5 years I've spent as a stay at home mother and homemaker. Why is that? Is it really how I feel or is it just societal pressures that infect my thoughts and won't allow me to feel content with such a life? Im not sure. Sometimes the social changes brought on by feminism feel an awful lo…
/r/RedPillWives29/01/17 04:02 PM
3

Thanks for all the responses ladies. I realize it was kind of silly for me to post without telling the details so thank you for humoring me anyway. We talked about it after the kids went to bed and it actually went pretty well. I approached it in a very vulnerable way and made it more about how the situation made me feel and my own shortcomings vs just telling him he was wrong. I was careful on choosing my words so as not to criticize him. Then just kinda left it like that and let him process an…
/r/RedPillWives02/12/16 11:35 AM
4

I guess it's all about finding ways to appreciate the disconnect between the outcome you want to have, and the process you don't want to do. Thanks for that!^^ that's truly what I needed to hear.
/r/RedPillWives30/11/16 05:42 PM
2

Thanks ladies! All good suggestions. I do think I could give my older 2 more responsibilities around the house. The thing is though, it always turns into a huge ordeal because they don't listen or whine and complain about doing it, so I find myself taking the easy way out and just doing it myself. Of course, that isn't sustainable in the long run so I've got to start fixing that. My husband is quite a neat freak. I know it would make him happier to see the house a bit cleaner so I'd like to get …
/r/RedPillWives30/11/16 02:22 PM
10

Decorate the house. Bake/decorate cookies for Santa. Open a present on Christmas Eve- a board game the whole family can play together. Take them to see Christmas lights. Make 'reindeer food' and sprinkle it on the front lawn on Christmas Eve. Read Christmas books. Watch Christmas movies. Make a craft (lots of ideas on Pinterest)
/r/RedPillWives30/11/16 12:55 PM
3

Yes. The grilled cheese story helped. Basically don't rain on his parade over every little thing. Got it! Thanks :) really appreciate all your help!
/r/RedPillWives22/11/16 07:53 PM
2

Ok so about 3/4 the was through... idk... we have separate finances. I have no desire to merge them and neither does he. He is frequently deployed overseas so it's not really an option anyway. Also if your husband misses the exit while driving, do you really sit there like dumb mute and not say anything? That's a bit ridiculous. There's gotta be a more gentle way of making him aware that doesn't compromise his masculinity or your intelligence. Other than that, i do see the underlying points. So …
/r/RedPillWives22/11/16 07:39 PM
3

Thank you! I just downloaded it through audible and listening now while I clean. I will definitely update :)
/r/RedPillWives22/11/16 06:46 PM
1

Yea you're right, no sense in playing the blame game. Sorry if it came off that way. I just thought maybe it was relevant considering a lot of times it's the other way around. That the husband is begging for attention and not getting it. But for us it seems to be the opposite. Lately, he's been more involved and invested in 'us' instead of just treating me like a roommate. Well, we both have made strides in that regard. Feels like we're getting some of the emotional/ physical intimacy back final…
/r/RedPillWives22/11/16 06:06 PM
1

Totally agree. The grass definitely isn't greener on the other side. I'm totally aware of that and want no parts of a divorce, whatsoever. I just don't want to end up with just a 'roommate' when the kids are grown and have left he house either, which is definitely where we were headed before making changes this last year. I am unhappy in my life in general which has spilled out into my relationships with my husband and kids. I will and do own that. But then that's a viscous cycle in itself, beca…
/r/RedPillWives21/11/16 08:20 PM
1

Also I forgot to mention... the issue isn't me being too overwhelmed to have time for him. It's the other way around. So I guess our situation doesn't really fit the narrative here. For a long time, I was too overwhelmed to care. But to make it clear, he wasn't putting the moves on me and being rejected either. He didn't care, never tried to initiate or at least that's the way he made it seem. Aside from times that I was either pregnant or breastfeeding, I have always been the higher sexual driv…
/r/RedPillWives21/11/16 08:03 PM
1

Your misery will leak out Thanks for the ugly cry lol... but seriously, you hit the nail on the head. It seeps into everything.
/r/RedPillWives21/11/16 05:12 PM
1

He is working. Not escaping. I've said it a million times here. If y'all break up, you will still need to do everything you do............ PLUS work..........ALL BY YOURSELF. I think my issue is.... I did that. I was technically a working single parent for a year when he was overseas. And work did feel like an escape to me. I have a hard time putting that out of my mind. A lot boils down to me not feeling fulfilled as a person in the stay at home parent role (product of modern feminism?? maybe) …
/r/RedPillWives21/11/16 04:57 PM
4

ohhhhh lmao... ok, I clearly have more reading to do lol. Thanks for the catch.
/r/RedPillWives21/11/16 04:39 PM
1

The only reason I mentioned the SMV is because i read something about creating "dread". I full agree with the only person I dress to impress would be my husband. But I was thinking about the "dread" perspective that if other males took note, maybe he would recognize the catch that he has? idk- seems silly now that I'm typing it out lol.
/r/RedPillWives21/11/16 04:24 PM
2

For a long time mainly after the twins were born, I was not pleasant to be around. I was depressed. Pretty much hated my life. Resented him for getting to escape it 8+ hours a day at work. Our house was a complete shit show. A lot of times he was deployed and I was on my own completely with the kids, 4,500+ miles away from any family or help. I did my best to keep up with everything, clean house and food on the table every night, but it took absolutely everything out of me and then some. I was a…
/r/RedPillWives21/11/16 04:20 PM
1

Thanks for your response. So when things changed might not be very RPW friendly- I'm not sure. Basically I tried to initiate for the millionth time and got rejected. I just hit this wall where I was done with it. I was tired of trying, nothing was working and it was just emotionally exhausting. So I told him that. I said I was done trying that I guess, it just is what it is- and will continue to be that until I get tired enough to leave. I think that finally got through to him, he actually shed …
/r/RedPillWives21/11/16 04:08 PM
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