TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

Hot-Law2682 Archive

View 3 posts and 1,679 comments by Hot-Law2682 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Showing the 1,000 most recent of 1,679 comments.
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
0

You keep only taking your logic halfway. You keep creating these absolute dichotomies where men actually desire their less attractive partners whereas women don't without justifying them. Men could genuinely prefer their less hot, lower stress woman just as women could genuinely prefer their less hot, charming, provider man. Once you acknowledge that desire goes beyond physical attraction who are you to say women don't desire men they date and marry for these broad reasons? Women do not want to …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 04:32 AM
1

In almost every case the reason people pair up is because someone they desired more did not give them the relationship they wanted. This is true for men and women. I still don't know how "mutually choosing the best realistic partner" is different. Both situations are mutual, both situations involve choosing the best partner you can. I think the question is what is attractive enough to actually be considered desired. You refuse to acknowledge factors outside of looks in male selection but they ex…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 03:21 AM
-2

or just understand that people have different standards for casual and relationships
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 08:54 PM
1

Most of what you said I agree with. If you just care about raw physical attraction and nothing else then being a ONS is better. However, I don't understand the difference between "viewing him as the best man she could realistically imagine being with" and "he was the best available man willing to provide the relationship she now wanted" Both of these sound like the same thing, he is the best man she has the ability to enter a relationship with. But this is true for men too. Before basically ever…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 08:38 PM
1

A one night stand is filling a role too. I have heard women describe ONS partners as "human dildos" and living sex toys. Also that phrase "being chosen" is doing a lot of work. It is two very different roles, having sex once vs having sex hundreds of times over many years while living together and forming an intimate personal bond leading to having and raising kids together and creating a family. If you only want sex with as little effort as possible then obviously a ONS is better, but its not c…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 04:33 AM
1

Words have meaning. "Long term relationship" means long. You aren't in a long term relationship if you have been dating for a week lol. But it sounds like you haven't even been in a committed relationship for a week. Part of the difficulty in getting a LTR is that enthusiasm can easily fade over time. This is one aspect that getting an ONS is easier, you only need to maintain enthusiasm for a few hours.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 11:37 PM
1

You were responding to the claim that "You think it’s more of an achievement to get someone to sleep with you once than to have someone choose you for years or decades?" With "I've had people say they would be in a relationship with me but no ONS" But that is not choosing you for years or decades, thats not even choosing you for a week lol. Thats just saying they want to try choosing you. You haven't had a LTR or an ONS so your argument is invalid. Just being in a relationship with someone isn't…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 11:17 PM
0

You have never had someone choose you for years or decades. Knowing people open to a relationship with you doesn't equal that lol. That is the thing about an LTR or a family, its impossible to create those immediately, they must be built over time.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 11:07 PM
-1

The only reason you get a girlfriend is to have sex? What about companionship? What about starting a family? Also even if you just want sex you will have sex hundreds more times with a gf than a ONS so its still not the same reward. Also two things: Women settle down with men they have raw desire for Desire can be built over time, its not instant in basically every case.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 11:04 PM
5

Why would a woman want to be with a man who has been rejected by hundreds of women? (Most men)
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 10:55 PM
3

I can see the logic behind a ONS being more of an achievement then just starting a relationship. However, a relationship has its value in being the starting point on the path to a family and children, which I would say is a much greater achievement than a ONS. Whether you want to talk about difficulty, legacy in the world and in someone's life, and impact on your own life, creating and raising a family with someone is more of an achievement than having sex with them once and never seeing them ag…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 10:53 PM
1

Yeah you never know the motive thats why worrying about this stuff is stupid. Understand and verbalize your needs in the relationship and make sure your partner is enthusiastically meeting them, but trying to sleuth out all the ways they treated their various exes and why they changed is silly.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 12:21 AM
2

https://preview.redd.it/0f1e7793gveh1.png?width=640&format=png&auto=webp&s=3c31daf6bf8f38f1c13f84c3ff499b5634549f24
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 12:11 AM
0

https://preview.redd.it/r1kinufwfveh1.png?width=1080&format=png&auto=webp&s=04907e399e418ca0f29202c1b39a24e636054b00 Hard to disagree lol
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 12:10 AM
2

Stop taking it as a personal attack when they see women dating bad men, as if women are actively choosing to be with these men to spite them. Understand that women can change their desires over time (like going from being interested in hookups to not interested) and stop assuming any change is not genuine and cynically employed to advantage of them. Stop assuming that moral behavior will directly lead to sex Honestly points 1 and 3 are pretty redpilled. Point 2 is what a lot of redpillers get hu…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 12:07 AM
4

yeah thats what I said
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 12:01 AM
3

I think its more the idea that if you do all these things you should find a partner because thats how it works for 99% of people. However nowhere in that statement does it say you will find an attractive partner, or a virgin one. But also that advice is old and is rapidly changing. My parents and their friends are boggled at how hard dating is now and tell us they don't really know what to do. It seems like people generally agree dating is harder nowadays and just being a normal, respectful guy …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 09:46 PM
2

Glad the police caught these scum. I won't pry further, I stand corrected. Sorry for everything you have gone through, these are evil people for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 09:28 PM
3

How did you come to the conclusion that they wanted to commit crimes only because their standards were too high? Did they say "oh if you were 6'3 I wouldn't have spiked your drink"? (rhetorical question but I am genuinely curious how you would figure that out). My only engagement with sugar dating is watching a 60 minutes video on it at least 5 years ago. In the video it seemed like most of the sugar babies were college-aged women who formed casual arrangements (not always sexual) as a way to ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 09:17 PM
3

How do you know the women who have high standards and the women who commit crimes are the same people? Sounds like there are two distinct groups: "Tiktok brainwashed" who have high standards and can't find anyone Criminals, druggers, murderers
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 08:58 PM
–

I think it depends on the man and the type of leverage, I don't agree with that as a base principle. But even the FDS sub makes it clear women should have avenues to earn their own money and not be fully reliant on a man. They tend to shoot more for "my money is my money and his money is our money" scenarios rather than "I have no money and he has all the money". But the reason I say it depends is that offline people aren't as worried about hyper-analyzing the amount of leverage each party has, …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 02:38 PM
–

What principle?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 02:24 PM
–

I never made a claim about what % of men are doing this. All I said was that the criticism is mostly levied towards men who are explicit in their desire to use power dynamics to facilitate bad behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 02:23 PM
–

I think a lot of the criticism about men pursuing relationships where there is a strong power imbalance in their favor is that these men explicitly do this to get away with bad behavior. They pursue people who are younger and/or poorer because they know they are more vulnerable and naïve and will let them get away with cheating, mental abuse, lack of effort, etc. Whereas when women pursue relationships where they have less power there is not the same possibility or stated desire for exploitation…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 01:31 PM
–

I have a feeling that if you did some self-reflection and analyzed these friendships you would realize these guys did WAY more for you than vice versa. These guys do favors for you, dress up in costumes, buy you meals, do you ever do these things for your male friends? I am guessing not, or very infrequently. And do these guys also buy dinner and dress up for their male friends? I am guessing not. So for you and the other women reading this, if you are friends with a guy and the effort in the re…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 11:18 PM
1

"used as a placeholder" sounds like the same neurotic insecurity men speak about when they claim they are being "settled for" Just because people are nervous their partner doesn't like them doesn't mean its actually happening.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 03:44 PM
1

Thats a fairly reductive take and can be said for anything. "you are poor because you haven't put yourself in a situation to achieve financial success" "you are sad because you haven't put yourself in a situation to achieve happiness" It says nothing about the things holding them back from being in that situation or the situation itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 03:37 PM
0

That is interesting, from what I have seen similar numbers of men and women form relationships from dating apps. https://nuancepill.substack.com/p/have-dating-apps-ruined-dating I'd say the fact that women get more offers for relationships than men yet men are more likely to be in a relationship from a dating app shows that men desire women more than the reverse. Men take the offers they can get whereas women get tons of offers and often don't select any of them.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 03:35 PM
1

Im genuinely trying to be nice lol
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 03:11 AM
8

Yes but even taking that into account women still get more desire on dating apps than men, even just purely because of the skewed gender ratio.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 12:11 AM
5

https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/poll-gen-zs-gender-divide-reaches-politics-views-marriage-children-suc-rcna229255 https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/02/08/for-valentines-day-5-facts-about-single-americans/ https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/women-men-femosphere-new-statesman-poll-b2958208.html https://xcancel.com/jakozloski/status/2050540807049171242#m, https://xcancel.com/jakozloski/status/2054652650705043938#m I'll admit a lot of research does show that ge…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 12:11 AM
1

I hope you find someone who makes you feel special
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 11:17 PM
0

Bruh if you really like this girl its worth a 5 minute conversation to assess her feelings
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:10 PM
46

Many surveys show that currently men desire women more than women desire men. Its not that women are "too good" its more that single women are generally "good enough" for men whereas single men are not for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:08 PM
10

Who decides what standards are legitimate or not? Or is the rule just that "if your standards come in part from online culture then they are invalid"?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:07 PM
1

As your study shows physical attractiveness still matters for LTR. That is why I asked you how much is "enough". Because I guess to you desire only matters if it leads to a hookup.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:01 PM
1

I am repeating what the study found, men were willing to trade other factors for looks whereas women moreso balanced things equally. "For both their ideal long-term (marriage) partner and short-term (casual sexual) partner, participants allocated 100 mate dollars to acquire percentile points across five characteristics" In their method valuing something highly directly takes points away from another dimension. Also the study found significant differences in preferences between women of different…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 08:39 PM
1

As people get older their looks worsen (they get fat, wrinkles, balding, etc) and they tend to date people around their age who also look worse. However, with life experience you develop confidence in the love languages and relationship dynamics that suit you best. So yeah you will probably date worse looking people as you get older (because you will also look worse than your younger self) but that doesn't mean the relationship itself is worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 01:39 PM
1

Yes because men have fewer factors they care about for a LTR vs women. For example, man care much less about status/income. Enough to feel mentally ok with being in a LTR with a woman. I just see it as natural that if I am married to someone that means they wanted to marry me and not just use me as a hookup.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 01:01 PM
–

But if a woman doesn't hook up with a guy that doesn't mean she didn't find him attractive. That is the real issue in all these debates. No one debates that getting a hookup means she is attracted, where it gets really spicy is this idea that if you didn't get a hookup your entire relationship is a lie and your gf actually has no desire for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 12:56 PM
2

It makes sense that when add additional factors into a decision the power of each individual factor decreases. But you are making the decision that however much physical attraction matters for an LTR is not enough. I don't see what about this data is "dark" or "heartbreaking".
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 10:25 PM
1

If you follow OP's "casual sex equals desire" thing then it gets tricky. If she doesn't have casual sex with you then she is settling. But if she has casual sex with you (and likely others as well) then research shows the divorce rate is higher. So you are kinda fucked either way.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 09:37 PM
1

Why is this heartbreaking? Doesn't it make sense that for a LTR women would care more about things like status and resources relative to a hookup? But this doesn't mean that looks don't matter for a LTR, just that other factors matter too, which makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 09:19 PM
1

what data?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 09:16 PM
0

I don't understand this. If hookups are the way to determine desire than a woman who never has hookups just doesn't desire any men. Unless you want to acknowledge that sometimes women find men attractive but don't hook up with them, but then the whole "hookups determine desire" thing falls apart.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 09:15 PM
1

How do you know how many women settle? Its easy to accept that it happens, but how often?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 09:13 PM
2

The only way women can win in this worldview is by instantly having sex with any man they would consider having a relationship with. This is great for men, they get more sex with less effort, which is the goal of a lot of men's dating solutions.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 09:12 PM
1

Rehab room says that. He says looks = personality and says if you aren't an 8/10 at least you will never get genuine desire and will always be a cuck or an oofy doofy who is getting cheated on or used for money.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 10:09 PM
1

According to a lot of the blackpill people I debate here looks are literally the only factor lol
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 07:49 PM
5

Being slim/skinny is attractive for a woman and unattractive for a man. A skinny guy with no muscle who wants a skinny woman with no muscle is likely looking for someone more attractive than them, so they will have a hard time.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 07:19 PM
-1

Most people meet partners through social circles or shared activities like school, work, or hobbies. The dichotomy of either cold approach or dating apps is false.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 07:13 PM
1

Actually agree with this. If you are a below average looking guy with a mediocre career who wants a young, thin, beautiful partner then going international is your best shot.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 07:11 PM
6

Ugly men are only 15% less likely to have partners compared to very attractive men? Factors besides looks (education level) significantly affect chances of finding a partner? Thanks for linking this
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 07:09 PM
1

Does this mean she will never be authentically attracted to him? Also women don't participate in hookups as frequently as the internet thinks
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 07:18 PM
1

Is it true that if she doesn't have sex with you in the first week she will never genuinely desire you?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 07:17 PM
1

When a lot of people say "game" they just mean being charismatic and interesting, which obviously helps with dating. If you think it doesn't you are just wrong. But in the traditional sense "game" is a very specific set of instructions and phrases taught by a PUA. These CAN work too but are extremely situational and only give specific outcomes. They also often require a certain extend of lying/twisting of truth. Here is an example strategy from John Anthony: Introduce yourself to a drunk girl at…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 06:43 AM
2

This is the normal experience for a ton of guys, attraction growing over time through knowing someone better. Its a shame that now young men are being told by blackpill/redpill internet guys that if a girl doesn't fuck you within a few days of meeting you then you are a cuck/simp/beta/oofy doofy who is just being used while she fucks chad on the side. Even if she does have sex with you later its not the "authentic desire" chad gets and will always end in cheating/divorce/etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 06:39 AM
10

If you are just gonna make stuff up why 5% why not 1% or 0.01%? Its not like you are basing your number in any sort of fact or evidence, so might as well say women only date the top 0.01% of men and 99.9% of men have never been on a date ever.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 12:10 AM
3

The online blog is summarizing the results of the 2021 and 2022 GSS. "an overwhelming majority of men get zero attention om dating apps" Can you provide evidence for that? All the data I have looked at shows the average man gets around 1-3 likes a day (on Hinge at least). https://preview.redd.it/cnjjp5lwdj7h1.png?width=1534&format=png&auto=webp&s=5f53d665c5dbddc33aa9c69215cc8899b5a9f72f https://nuancepill.substack.com/p/have-dating-apps-ruined-dating But in terms of all accounts you can see the …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 12:09 AM
6

Its definitely gonna suck, social security will have to be restructured/cut, towns will become empty, etc. But I believe in the long run we will survive. AI will help increase efficiency to make up for worker shortages, and as the population falls more economic opportunity will open up for young people. Plenty of demographic groups (namely variants of Christian conservatives) have fertility ~1.6. This isn't replacement but isn't extremely low either.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 10:00 PM
1

It is such a big issue and I don't know what to do about it. You can create these avenues for young men to be useful, volunteering groups, jobs programs, etc. But what I am seeing generally from the "disenfranchised men" group is that they don't care about any of those things if they aren't guaranteed a wife/girlfriend along with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 09:56 PM
1

Housing is by in large an issue of supply and demand. There are too many people wanting to live in urban, heavily populated areas. Housing definitely could be cheaper through proper policy but we will never get to the point where everyone who wants to own a house wherever they want can do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 09:53 PM
1

based, thanks for holding down the fort.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 09:50 PM
0

If you compare the frequencies of violent desires within incel communities to the frequencies of violent desires within partnered men I'd guess incels are more violent. But yeah incels can't abuse their girlfriends if they are single.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 09:49 PM
1

The issue for bottom tier men is that the ugliest women usually stop trying to date or have sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 09:46 PM
2

maybe stop being hypergamous
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 09:44 PM
0

nah
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 09:42 PM
12

considering the alternative is people entering relationships they don't want or need... Isn't this better? I do agree there should be more resources and avenues for two people who want relationships to find each other btw.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 09:42 PM
–

Investing in a woman is beta, the more you invest the more beta you are. Peak alpha is a man who has sex with a woman 10 seconds after meeting her without even learning her name and ghosts her after. Peak beta is a man who pays for every bill in a woman's life and provides constant emotional support.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 09:40 PM
2

It works when there is an extremely high discrepancy between men and womens earnings. Once women started getting college degrees and earning more similar amounts of money to men it became less of a factor. Only ~20% of men are the sole breadwinner in their marriage down from 50% in 1972. The majority of married men still outearn their wives but this is decreasing. https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2023/04/13/in-a-growing-share-of-u-s-marriages-husbands-and-wives-earn-about-the-same/ This…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 04:34 PM
3

If the "desired lifestyle" includes a relationship with a woman then it follows that men need to address women's feelings. Having a nice salary and career is not gonna do that. So expecting your career to be the tool that gives you access to relationships is silly.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 02:54 PM
2

Do men want relationships with women or ownership of women? Because a relationship requires mutual feelings from both participants, and feelings can't be forced. Ownership can be forced, however. But if men want relationships the only real solution seems to be to address women's feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 01:27 PM
1

its not that hard to find a car that stays on the road
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 03:30 AM
1

Your standard to be an alpha was just receiving sex. I think you would admit that women will have sex with guys they wouldn't start a family with. So it seems like alpha and beta are optimizing for different things. The alpha optimizes towards traits that lead to quick and easy sex, the beta optimizes towards traits that lead to family formation. They are desirable in different contexts. And it makes sense that alphas are more valued in youth because people generally don't try to start families …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 11:35 PM
1

People only get in car accidents when they drive cars.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 11:29 PM
1

If a man is dating a woman 99% of the time he is only with her because the 50 stacies he dm'd first ghosted him.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 09:07 PM
1

According to all the comments in this thread a "beta" is just a man who invests emotionally and financially in a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 09:04 PM
2

there is data for women, I am asking if you know what it is
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:58 PM
1

From this definition being alpha or beta has nothing to do with moral goodness. For example, someone who constantly lies to women to get sex could be an "alpha" whereas the same person who is more honest might then need more investment and be a "beta". So is preferring to be alpha over beta just a selfish decision in the end? Also wouldn't it make sense that women prefer to start families with men who offer actual emotional and financial investment?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:57 PM
0

What would indicate that you are disrespected or hated?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:54 PM
1

You keep bringing up the absolute worst case scenario that happens less than 0.1% of the time. However, childless and unmarried men are significantly less happy then married men with kids, this is the expected outcome.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:53 PM
1

Its not pity. Doesn't it make sense that when a woman is looking to form a family they value someone who can support that family and who they can trust to be loyal? These are all "beta" qualities.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:48 PM
1

https://dailycitizen.focusonthefamily.com/do-young-men-want-to-be-married-in-2026/ Ok but the numbers are real
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:47 PM
3

Lol cuck has lost all meaning
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:45 PM
2

There are longitudinal studies tracking happiness before and after marriage that show getting married makes you happier. https://ifstudies.org/blog/does-getting-married-really-make-you-happier
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:44 PM
–

What percent of women have had 100+ sexual partners?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:40 PM
8

Popular MGTOW channels: Hammerhand Better Bachelor Sandman Thinking Ape All say women shouldn't have independence and shouldn't be able to vote. The core of MGTOW ideology nowadays is antifeminist.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 08:49 PM
1

Basically it is. How many LTRs exist where the man offers 0 financial support? It never happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:51 PM
1

More than 20% of men are in relationships lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:49 PM
1

Thats like 99.9% of men. Very few women is going to enter into a LTR with a man who has 0 financial commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:47 PM
–

I don't text my current gf that often (maybe 2-4x a day) and thats what I like. If I find out she was more enthusiastic about texting with an ex I wouldn't care because thats not something I need in a relationship. I understand your idea of evidence pointing to desire, but you are still just guessing. I know I will never truly know how someone feels about me, they could be a virgin who treats me better than everyone else but deep down be an emotionless sociopath who feels nothing. I measure desi…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:54 PM
1

My logic is not that "the past doesn't matter at all" my logic is "the past matters insofar as it indicates whether she will meet my needs". If someone cheated on someone in their past then thats a predictor they would cheat now and seriously violate my needs.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:54 PM
1

Does it make you happy? Does it make you feel secure? I am just trying to understand why someone would prefer a girlfriend who consistently gives 10% effort over a girlfriend who gave 95% effort to her ex but gives 90% effort currently.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:40 PM
2

The sad thing is these situations are just totally made up 99.9% of the time. There is a presentation of OCD called retroactive jealousy, basically where someone has intrusive thoughts of their partner having sex and desiring other people. Its literally often a manifestation of mental illness.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:34 PM
0

Why do you want consistency/fairness? What about that makes it the top priority?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:30 PM
1

Being cheated on once means there is a much higher likelihood of it happening again, and they still violated my needs at that time which is harmful to know. I guess if it was 5+ years in the past I probably wouldn't end things but only if I was extremely confident they wouldn't cheat again. "If you know you're with someone who loved their ex more, there's no reason anyone needs to be okay with that." So you keep changing around the wording, lets go with what you say the scenario is: "If you know…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:25 PM
2

I do. No divorces at all in my immediate family for the last two generations. No divorces among my parent's friends, though one couple is in a semi-open marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:17 PM
0

Well I think the rationale plays a big role. If you had money before and lost it I think a gf will be ok with relative downsizing. Even if you are just choosing to spend money on other things. But telling them "yeah I just don't like you enough" yeah thats gonna sting. People understand as a general idea that its silly to expect your partner to treat you the exact same as their exes, things change. But thats different from admitting "I literally don't like you as much".
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:10 PM
1

I mean if they cheated that meant they violated the trust of the relationship and betrayed you. But loving someone else at some prior point in time before they even knew you is not a betrayal. Have whatever standard you want I am just curious why this matters. Does it just feel bad? Btw you can never really know if your partner loved someone else "more". You can try to guess but you can never know their true feelings. Thats part of why this mindset confuses me, generally it seems like people are…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:04 PM
1

I agreed it is easier for women on online dating, even if just because of the gender ratio. My point is that we don't see 90% of women going on dates and having sex through online dating with the top 5% of men, a similar amount of men and women find success. Women are more selective in some things, like height and income. Men are more selective in age which is a big factor. Also depends on if we are talking casual sex or dating. Women are far more selective for casual sex but thats because they …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 02:41 AM
2

I guess it depends where you look. Depending on the subreddit a post of a woman complaining about dating will either have comments calling her a dumb whore who only wants chad or saying men are trash. I don't use instagram or X but I have heard they are equally volatile. But I have also seen reddit threads where older male virgins are met with pity and understanding. It depends on the context. It really depends on if the angle is "women are wrong to not date me" or "it sucks I am too low value t…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 02:19 AM
1

As you explained, differences in swipe strategies and population sizes on dating apps make determining true desirability difficult. For example, lots of men swipe of every single profile then decide who to message after. This is why when you control for attractiveness there are similar reply rates between men and women. Men might swipe right on ugly women but that doesn't mean they will message them. So swipe data is kinda useless, focusing on outcomes, this is what catches my eye: - The share o…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 02:04 AM
1

Yes, it sucks to be undesirable. I don't get the point of tone policing on the internet. We have decided as a culture that the internet is a shitty place where everyone hates each other. Women are constantly shit on and called whores whenever they talk about dating. If you really want to feel supported or understood talk to people irl, or go to a very specific and small internet space.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 01:36 AM
1

Never said anything about messaging first, just messaging period. Least attractive (0/5) men recieved 11% of all messages from women compared to least attractive women recieving 1% of all messages from men. Most attractive men (the two highest tiers) recieved 5% of all messages from women. Most attractive women received around 40% of all messages from men. As for dating app swiping: Data from a study on Tinder users shows that match inequality is similar for both sexes, with the top 20% of both …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 01:32 AM
1

So then you agree with the idea that men's desire for sex doesn't override the women's preference for autonomy. Therefore, if a man has no women attracted to him, its on the man to make himself attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 01:13 AM
1

You can say this but the Okcupid messaging data just proves you wrong. Women are more willing to message people they rated as "unattractive" than men are. Sure, keep ranting about your own personal opinions but they are wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 12:54 AM
1

Would you have sex with an attractive woman if you knew she didn't want to but couldn't say no?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 12:50 AM
3

So you don't have any actual counter argument?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:55 PM
7

"wanting wife treatment from a man they met a few days ago" This does not happen lol
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:48 PM
11

You can't say simps are thirsty and desperate when your standard for being a simp is "pays for a date" and "acts chivalrous". By this logic most men have been simps since dating became a thing. You don't have to put in effort if you don't want to but for a lot of guys building a relationship with someone is worth spending $50 on a meal and being a nice person. Also if men stopped "simping" all the issues with dating would just get worse. Women would gravitate even more strongly towards the most …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:40 PM
7

Yeah, I admittedly had a similar mindset when I was 20 and super desperate for a girlfriend. I believed I would be the perfect boyfriend to literally any girl and would do anything just for companionship. Its like how someone desperate for a job will tell any interviewer that they will cherish the opportunity and work as hard as they can. Well guess what? After 6 months of working there that person is gonna be dreading Mondays and cutting corners like every other employee, even if they were genu…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 02:32 PM
7

You have to think of things from the women's perspective. Male validation for sexual attractiveness isn't that valuable. Women get hit on since the age of 13, they know men want to fuck them. So if not validation what is the benefit of casual sex? Pleasure? Nope, around 80% of women report not feeling sexually satisfied in their hookups. Social capital? Nope, women are shamed and seen as lower value for engaging in hookups. So it really doesn't sound that great. This is why women have high regre…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 02:10 PM
2

I see this argument a lot but investment in what? Is she really with this guy just for a free meal once a week and maybe a gift every so often? My point is that most of the "investment" that occurs in relationships is not direct gifting, its investment in the relationship itself. Helping pay for an apartment so you can live together, paying for experiences together, paying for a wedding, eventually helping support a family together. So why would someone care about investment in a relationship wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 04:16 AM
12

Most women aren't even looking for hookups and aren't receptive to them even from very attractive strangers. Trying to only meet women through hookups is basically impossible for most men, but internet brainrot has dudes thinking every girl has slept with 50 chads so if she doesn't fuck him right away then hes a cuck or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 08:10 PM
8

"raw attraction" is just another way of saying "fucks me right away" Attraction is not static, it changes for better or for worse. If you genuinely desire a long term relationship and a family its silly to think of attraction as something that is only built in the first few hours or even days of an interaction. I want a long term relationship. I'd rather be with someone who I know is attracted to me 5 years after we meet than someone who only wants me for one night. But if you want quick and eas…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 08:08 PM
5

So you deny familiarity bias? Its a frequently-replicated phenomena where people become more attractive to each other just by spending more time together. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21381850/ Or do you deny the idea that factors other than physical appearance contribute to attraction? Because this has also been consistently demonstrated: “Gross and Crofton presented a photograph of a (fictional) female student attached with verbal descriptions of her personality. Male and female participant…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 03:35 PM
1

There are epochs of desire. I'd say generally desire peaks during the honeymoon phase around 6-10 months in. But that means desire has increased from day 1. It might go down after the 1 year mark then increase again at 5 years... still has increased from day 1. My point is that someones attraction towards you after knowing you a few hours to a few days does not encompass the full extent of their possible feelings. That is obvious to most normal people but people on here make it sound like desire…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 03:31 PM
2

You are wrong about me but this isn't about me anyways. I don't go on here to look for dating advice for myself lol. Anyways this is terrible messaging for the lonely men out there who struggle with dating. "Only date women who have sex with you a few hours after meeting you" Yeah thats not gonna work.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 12:34 PM
2

Can desire grow over time?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 12:18 PM
0

several hours lol
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 12:10 PM
35

Really depends on context. Are we talking waiting for two weeks or two months? Are we talking no physical contact at all or no sex? Really what I fundamentally disagree with is the line that if a woman likes you she will "try to hookup with you early on". Not every woman wants hookups or is looking for them at every moment. If you want a hookup go for hookups but don't pretend like hookups are the only way to secure desire. What makes this terrible advice is that women are much less likely to pu…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 12:09 PM
1

Your desire for sex, romantic intimacy, and a family, depends on your personality and goals. If you are someone who has a high sex drive, desperately craves intimacy, or really wants a family then I think access to those things greatly outweighs the cons. If you are asexual or low sex drive, don't desire companionship, and don't want a wife/kids then yeah its probably not worth the effort.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 10:46 PM
3

I am not asking you to feel sympathy for women, I am just asking you to explain why men not getting sex is unfair.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:50 PM
4

Seems like you have given up on trying to make an argument
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:44 PM
5

Lol you are just crashing out now. I get it you want to have sex without commitment but why is not getting that unfair? Unless do you believe the definition of fair is "I get what I want", and if you don't get what you want then its unfair?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:33 PM
2

You still haven't made an argument. The image you posted is about dual-mating strategy, or the idea that women have different standards for short and long-term partners. But how is that unfair?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:26 PM
4

This guy is either a troll or 15 or genuinely stupid. His positions are nonsense, he believes that no one owes anyone intimacy or commitment or even honestly but also women owe all men sex. Its contradictory nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:25 PM
2

Yes, I am consistent with my logic. It is fair for men to reject women over 30, 25, whatever, if that is what they want to do. Just because someone cries about something doesn't mean they deserve it lol. Also you still haven't explained why its unfair.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:20 PM
5

How is it unfair for someone to not get something they need? If I get a 35/100 on the test is it fair that I fail? But I needed to pass the test.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:15 PM
9

I agree for commitment but not honesty. Commitment involves access to someone else's body and time, honestly is about ensuring mutual success for both parties. Someone who wants to force commitment does not care about the wellbeing of the other party, someone who wants to force honesty does. Yes you are obligated to be honest to others as a measure of insuring proper consent and understanding before engaging (i.e. not having someone do something they didn't agree to). Is cheating morally justifi…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:13 PM
5

What is unfair about this?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:07 PM
10

No one is obligated to give someone else sex or intimacy just because they want it. The difference between these two situations is that the man is lying about wanting a relationship/commitment whereas the woman never lies about her intentions. Yes, in both situations someone isn't getting something they want but at least the woman who friendzones the guy is being truthful about her intentions. Do you not see the difference? I admit there are situations where a woman will knowingly lead a guy on,…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 07:01 PM
1

Men would be open to sex with an older woman if it was presented to them and it required no effort. But even courting older women requires effort and young men mostly choose to direct their effort towards women their age and younger, which is also the most desirable demographic of women overall.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 07:47 PM
–

Its all nonsense speculation. Just people saying "look at where we are at now imagine where we will be in the future" Yeah, you can imagine it. Doesn't mean its gonna happen
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 07:42 PM
–

Its mostly gonna be used by couples who struggle with infertility.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 07:41 PM
–

I agree with this one. We are seeing AI chatbots meet a lot of intimacy needs for lonely people. Research has even shown using them improves mental health. But the catch is that women use these bots as much if not more than men.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 07:40 PM
–

Who is gonna raise the kid tho?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 07:39 PM
–

It sounds good yes, but its not a realistic option which most men understand. These type of robots are likely never going to exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 07:38 PM
–

This is the equivalent of all the people who said we would have flying cars by the 2000s. You have no clue what the rate of development of this technology will be and what is really possible. You can hope that the sex robots you want eventually exist, but there isn't strong evidence its gonna happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 07:36 PM
–

I am all for sex robots but at this point these things are basically silicon-covered mannequins with a speaker inside them. There is no internal lubrication, no jaw or throat mechanics, their arms or legs don't move or if so they move at the pace of a 90 yr old with arthritis in every joint and ofc can't support any weight. Also, the really advanced ones in the video that have tons of facial mechanics and smooth arm movements? You can't fuck those. But if it works for you then go for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 07:28 PM
3

I never argued mid-20s men should go for mid 30s. Even just 5-6 years older expands your pool by a lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:16 PM
1

40% for 2 years younger, more like 10% for 4-6 years younger 21 is a big stopping point for women because under 21 men are seen as much less mature. But the messaging data shows men aged 22+ get interest from women aged 24-30 though the interest declines as the women get older.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 07:33 PM
1

Men aren't as choosy about looks but they are choosy about age. Also the reason young women can be so picky is that they are the most desirable for casual sex and get tons and tons of offers from men of all ages. So again, if a young, ugly guy wants to increase his chances of having casual sex he should widen his age range.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 06:03 PM
-1

yep and its an aspect of male pickiness that is rarely discussed
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:58 PM
2

Most young men are unwilling to at least attempt to have sex with either. Men are selective about sexual attraction when it comes to age, thats my whole point.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:55 PM
2

Yes they are, especially on dating apps
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:54 PM
2

China has to start accepting immigrants from SEA. I think that is their main way out.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:53 PM
1

I am talking about young men dating 28-30 year old women. Not 40 year old MILFs lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:47 PM
0

That paper talks about the marriage market, which involves older people. As men and women get older dating outcomes equalize and the vast majority of men and women 80%+ get married or find relationships. At this level where average people do fine the below average (ugly) stand out in terms of underperformance. And yes, I agree its harder as an ugly guy, but that doesn't affect my point. If anything ugly guys should be even more willing to widen their age ranges and not just chase after the most …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:45 PM
1

Im not talking about 22 year old men dating 40 year old women, moreso 22 year old men dating 28 year old women. But yeah, at least we can agree widening the age range would increase the chance of finding hookups.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:44 PM
–

Yes, I left this out but its very important. In the future the proportion of young women is going to be even smaller, so competition is going to be insane.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:37 PM
1

Its not gonna solve male loneliness but enough older women are open to dating/having sex with younger men that it would help if men widened their horizon. Especially when we consider casual sex. You can't deny that it would be way easier for a 22 year old man to get casual sex if they considered women age 19-28 compared to only trying to attract women 19-22.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:35 PM
4

Many are, on average a 28 year old woman sends more messages to a 25 year old man than a 32 year old man for example. But even if its not suddenly super easy, widening the net of possible people you would date would definitely increase the chances of success. Especially when we consider casual sex. You can't deny that it would be way easier for a 22 year old man to get casual sex if they considered women age 19-28 compared to only trying to attract women 19-22.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:33 PM
3

Republicans winning elections means a worse life for single men (and everyone who isn't wealthy really). You can be smug about it but you are just voting for your own suffering lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 02:39 PM
–

Your top link is just about sexual activity since turning 18 not dating. The bottom link is about teen gen z not having dated. I guess an 18 year old is an "adult" but I would consider "adult gen z" to be more in the 23-27 age range.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/25 03:42 PM
1

Divorced men are equally as happy as never married men https://ifstudies.org/blog/exploring-the-happiness-premium-for-ever-married-men
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/25 08:16 PM
3

If you compare men with equal income, levels of fitness, social connections, the married one is more happy. Why do you think that is?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/25 08:14 PM
4

If you believe certain behaviors and values are good you should practice them, unless you are a bad person. But yes just being kind and virtuous doesn't make you attractive to women (on its own). It can make you more attractive though: “Gross and Crofton presented a photograph of a (fictional) female student attached with verbal descriptions of her personality. Male and female participants gave higher physical attractiveness ratings under the condition of favorable descriptions (e.g., generous, …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/25 08:14 PM
1

Depends on what survey you look at. Others have it as low as 50% with singleness for women being between 40-45% The pew survey is especially strange for the 29% gap in singleness between women and men. This gap has not been replicated in other surveys and has even shown to be nonexistent in the 2024 GSS data. https://nuancepill.substack.com/p/further-evidence-against-the-pew-singleness-gender-gap https://nuancepill.substack.com/p/2024-update-to-the-gss-sexlessness-graph
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/25 04:50 PM
2

It was posted on this sub around a year ago with the raw data included. https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1RSUIqKbC49RwEkInvgvpHIQ0gvMaI2EhEIJsWRAnTR8/edit?usp=sharing&pli=1&authuser=0 This is a link to the raw data
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/25 04:46 PM
8

The PPD subreddit survey found about 30% of the male subreddit users were virgins. Of those virgins, around 50% were above the age of 24 the other 50% were ages 18-24. Overall 70% of the male users were over 25 and around 60% of that age group is single, definitely higher than a random sample of that age group. However its not that crazy considering reddit users skew younger and are more autistic/awkward. These are around the numbers I would expect from any subreddit, I dunno if PPD is especiall…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/25 02:58 AM
1

What study says "~30% of adult Gen Z have never dated"
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/25 05:11 PM
1

Can you link those studies? I remember seeing that ~45% of gen Z men didn't have relationships in their teens. Is that what you are referring to?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/25 08:33 PM
3

Evidence of what? It is not evidence that most men don't ever get any romantic or sexual attention, which is what you are claiming
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/25 04:33 PM
0

Most men have relationships and at least monthly sexual activity. https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/08/20/a-profile-of-single-americans/ https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle/2767066 What is your evidence that most men don't ever get any romantic or sexual attention?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 06:58 PM
0

Okay
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/25 08:17 PM
2

Well we have very different ideas of what a "provider man" means. I am referring to the general idea that men should make a good income to support their family. Most people agree with this: "Roughly seven-in-ten adults (71%) say it is very important for a man to be able to support a family financially to be a good husband or partner. By comparison, 32% say it’s very important for a woman to do the same to be a good wife or partner." https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2017/09/20/americans-se…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/25 08:14 PM
3

The idea that men should be "providers" within relationships is pretty widespread. Men don't see "provider" men as losers/creeps/weirdos, a lot of dudes are jealous of men who can provide a good life for their partner. If you love someone and are building a family together it makes sense to want to deliver economic stability. I don't think that makes you a simp or a betabuxx. I agree on the PPB stuff though.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/25 07:46 PM
1

I don't see a lot of the first kind.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/25 06:50 PM
3

Yes the goalposts always shift and you end up at a circular argument. "80% of men get no attention from women" - Well if you look at STD, marriage rates, and partner count data thats not true at all "Well if they aren't in the top 20% the women aren't attracted to them" - How do you know that? "Women are only attracted to the top 20% of men" - How do you know that? "Women aren't attracted to 80% of men"
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/25 06:46 PM
4

Ok but you aren't hot enough to act however you want so you need a good personality too
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/25 08:02 PM
2

Personality is only irrelevant IF you can compensate for it by having insane good looks. For most people personality matters: Research has found personality matters in terms of sustaining relationships (wow big shocker): https://www.researchgate.net/publication/382253515_A_Worldwide_Test_of_the_Predictive_Validity_of_Ideal_Partner_Preference_Matching Correlated ratings of partner competence in a variety of skills and traits (honesty, sex, etc) to relationship satisfaction. Found the traits which…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/25 07:44 PM
–

Most men never get the attention (for casual sex) women do because men are far more likely to seek out casual sex for a myiad of reasons including the orgasm gap, sex differences in impulsivity, double standards socially, and differences in sexual attraction. So even though most women don't engage in casual sex very frequently the interest and offers she gets from men will far exceed any interest men get. However, with all this being considered I wouldn't say the woman is "settling" dating someo…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/25 12:29 AM
6

For the first link you read it wrong, its ages 18-24 not 24. 40% virginity within that age range is possible if they sampled heavily from the 18-20 range. Also the second link is interesting but seems to contradict the first link, if 40% of people aged 18-24 were virgins you would expect the percent of virgins at 22 to be higher but its a bit lower. For the second link they didn't perform their own survey its a report using data from other sources but they don't include where they got the data f…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/25 12:15 AM
1

I laughed when I read your comment
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/25 05:31 PM
1

lol
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/25 05:28 PM
8

I am not talking about men under 25, I said men aged exactly 25. Virginity decreases logarithmically, around 50% of men are virgins at 18, 20% of men are virgins at 22 and this goes down to around 5% at 25. So overall its closer to 20% when you look at the 18-25 age range. But my point is that its very rare for a man to hit 25 and especially 30 with no romantic or sexual experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/25 05:23 PM
10

This is fairly rare. Only about 5% of men are virgins at age 25 and about 1% are virgins at 30. Single adults who have never been in a relationship have a median age of 24. Only around 6% of men aged 40 have never been in a relationship. https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/08/20/a-profile-of-single-americans/ https://datepsychology.com/are-27-of-young-men-really-virgins-and-why/
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/25 02:53 PM
1

I'm sorry you feel that way
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/25 01:38 PM
3

Dating apps don't fully make your point. Yes the top percentage of men get most of the likes but that doesn't mean they end up dating all the women. Research has found that when you randomly sample a set of dating app users men are as likely to have met someone from the app as women. This is because men get fewer likes but swipe more and go on more dates which makes up the difference. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s40806-019-00222-z All the stuff about Islam is interesting, I can't r…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/25 02:53 AM
5

You could argue that its the mans fault for not meeting the womens expectations. Or you could argue its the womens fault for having higher expectations than the man. The way I see it is if they got married at all thats a sign the man met her expectations at some point. So either her expectations increased (this would indicate its the womans fault) or the man got worse in some aspect (its the mans fault).
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 10:10 PM
2

I guess I misinterpreted you I thought you meant "a couple where both people have strong physical attraction to each other" rather than "a couple where both people have equally strong physical attraction to each other". If you mean the latter then I'd admit you are right. Most of the evidence I have seen shows that generally one partner is more attracted to the other even if not by much.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 10:06 PM
2

I feel like you could make as much of an argument for the reverse logic. If the woman filed, it must be because of something the man did, ergo the man broke it. It depends on if you see the filing as breaking the marriage or if the action that caused the filing breaks it. But then you can go down a huge rabbit hole of antecedent causes which convolutes everything. Basically, I appreciate your attempt at nuance and I understand how hard it is to figure this stuff out.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 10:04 PM
2

I agree with this.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 09:59 PM
0

Mutual does not mean equal it just means shared (at least to me). We can infer that men are more attracted to their female partners then reverse, yes, but this does not disprove that mutual attraction exists.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 09:58 PM
1

"Being looked at with disgust as if you were a Leper or a hobo." What is your evidence this happens? "men always have to date LOWER" I disagree, I have posted evidence people generally date those who are around their physical attractiveness level (even if they prefer people who are more attractive). What is your evidence to the contrary?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 09:55 PM
0

I thought you were asking for a framework about which lifestyles led to greater success in marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 09:53 PM
7

I sort of agree with you. Women ideally want a dominant man who is successful but who is also obsessed with them and emotionally open (to an extent). Redpill teaches men to be dominant and successful (good) but emotionally empty and closed-off (bad). Also the books are very exaggerated and supernormal. Women aren't actually looking for shredded billionaires because they know thats silly. But they still want a relatively successful and attractive guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 09:50 PM
2

Look at the actual divorce rate. Marriages between college educated couples are much less likely to end in divorce (~30%) compared to marriages of less educated couples ~55%
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 09:48 PM
1

Where is your evidence for this?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 09:27 PM
0

Nothing you has linked so far has proven this claim. This shows that men prioritize physical attractiveness more then women when selecting partners. Your other study showed women will trade off attractiveness for resources, they will select a less attractive male partner with resources over a broke guy who is very attractive. None of this proves "mutual strong physical attraction is quite rare for heterosexual couples"
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 09:16 PM
3

What to you mean by "treated like shit"? Also you are wrong about "average Men can only get relationships from ugly women" People tend to date those of similar physical attractiveness: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0191886924001909?via%3Dihub https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/sciadv.abm5629 Contrary to people might expect, this effect is stronger for couples who were NOT friends first: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26068893/ By the way this doesn't mean people don't …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 08:38 PM
1

Can you link a source that shows "mutual strong physical attraction is quite rare for heterosexual couples"
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 08:24 PM
6

I agree. Any post, red, black, or blue pilled that makes declarative statements about a fact of the world (most men are single, most women cheat, etc) needs to have at least one source for their claims. All the posts about "women only date 5% of men" would disappear overnight.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 06:41 PM
1

How high do you think it is?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 06:38 PM
2

How do you explain pew finding women are cohabitating at near double the rate of other surveys administered at the same time period? Your answers: -polygyny: These are cohabitating relationships. Meaning either a man has to live with multiple women at the same time (switching where they sleep every night I guess) or a bunch of women all live with the same man. Neither is happening. -Women are dating older men: I agree this is happening but why is it so much more prevalent in the pew study compar…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 06:34 PM
1

Its not a "sampling criticism". It literally is just oversampled. In the 2022 National Health Interview Survey, 2024 GSS, 2023 Survey Center on American Life, and 2022 APS, percentage of young women cohabiting or married was between 35-38%. This number was 66% of young women in the 2023 Pew survey. How do you explain a near doubling of cohabiting women within the same time period? "The average man under 40 needs sex 3 times a week minimum, many needing more." Where are you getting this from? I l…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 02:40 PM
4

Being currently single does not mean chronically single. People take this pew result to say that 60% of men are loser incels who never get attention from women. The reality is that only around 5% of men aged 40 have never had a relationship and around 80% of men have sex every year. https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/06/28/a-record-high-share-of-40-year-olds-in-the-us-have-never-been-married/ https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle/2767066#google_vignette This pew …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/25 01:19 PM
1

yeah but I don't think life was a mistake
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 03:06 PM
1

Its contentious in the sense that their anger is seen as threatening. You mentioned his name so its worth pointing out that some ER worshippers ARE actual incels. Plenty of "incel" men in this thread love gloating about how much they want women to suffer and how that is their new life goal. But generally people don't respond poorly to a lonely man being sad about his lack of success. I have done this song and dance before where I find tons of reddit posts of lifelong virgins sharing their storie…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 03:11 AM
2

Its funny how people see child slaves building iphones, millions of animals being tortured every year to provide meat, and tortures/genocides happening globally but what really pushes them into "life was a mistake" is seeing 6/10 men forced to date 4/10 women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 03:03 AM
1

To them I am truly sorry. They can still be desired as a member of a community, as a friend, as a mentor, etc. But yea life isn't fair and there are even average or decently attractive people who never experience a relationship because of shitty luck and circumstance. Its very rare but it happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 02:58 AM
1

The vast majority of incels are fakecels
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 02:38 AM
1

He said he can get sex with prostitutes or with women he isn't attracted to. So he can get sex by paying for it or by dating down.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 02:37 AM
–

So why do you deserve an attractive woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/25 02:33 AM
1

Why are they beneath you when you share the same traits?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/25 02:29 AM
1

It could be a looks issue. The looks standard for casual sex is different then the looks standard for relationships. So maybe she isn't hot enough to be relationship material. Redpillers admit this when they attack average women for sleeping with chad. I have never heard anyone say "your personality is too shit, maybe date a guy with a similarly shit personality" it is ALWAYS "oh you got P&D by chad? Maybe try dating a 5'6 guy next".
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/25 09:50 PM
1

Femcel just means celibate woman. Can be voluntary or involuntary.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 09:39 PM
1

My comment wasn't for you specifically my comment was speaking generally. Sorry you haven't found success.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 05:11 PM
1

You have one chance at life. Better to try and reach your potential then give up early and be miserable forever. The vast majority of men succeed in dating and relationships when they try.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 03:52 PM
1

maybe, maybe not. We are speaking in such a high degree of abstraction here. I have no clue what this mystery person would look like but yea I can agree there are people so ugly that no improvement can help. Very few people but they exist. This is not the case for the average man though. The average man benefits greatly from even soft looksmaxxing like skincare, clothing, and fitness.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 03:35 AM
3

This doesn't align with any of my relationships or those of my family and friends. Generally anywhere from 70-80% of men report feeling positive in their relationships. So I don't know where you are getting this from. I am sure it happens but you are claiming this is "most women" and not backing it up at all. Basically the same as those feminist rants about how most men only want sex from women and are incapable of love, also with 0 evidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 03:16 AM
1

Men will fuck women they wouldn't take back to their parents or introduce to their friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 12:59 AM
29

I don't care if my partner has hooked up with people hotter then me. I care if they are being a good partner and meeting my needs. I might care if I felt our investment was at totally different levels (I was a virgin and she had past partners or she was my first love and I wasn't for her, etc). But I have had sex plenty of times and fallen in love before. I expect my partner to have experience too and come from a mature perspective. I am not trying to bring back the butterflies of first love, I …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 12:50 AM
1

yes but you would look worse if you had acne, shitty clothes, and weren't jacked
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/25 11:17 PM
3

The first time divorce rate is ~40% and that drops to ~25% for college-educated couples. Around 75% of men are either completely or very satisfied with their relationship and married men are generally much happier than unmarried men. https://www.americansurveycenter.org/newsletter/is-marriage-better-for-men/ I don't think this would be true if 95% of marriages were to exploitative, abusive women who all either cheat or divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/25 12:04 AM
5

Yes men generally want relationships and sex more than women. Single men are more likely to report seeking out relationships. "61% of single men say they are currently looking for a relationship or dates, compared with 38% of single women." https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/08/20/a-profile-of-single-americans/ Also men generally report greater boosts in mental health when entering relationships. https://www.hu-berlin.de/en/press-portal/nachrichten-en/january-2025/nr-2517
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 11:41 PM
4

The issue is that no one can ever deserve a relationship with a specific person, a relationship only exists if an emotional bond is formed and you can't force that. Women get dating opportunities because men ask them out. I don't know how you equalize this. Men just want relationships and sex more then women so they flood dating apps and DMs. If anything this is mens fault for being so desperate.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 09:30 PM
15

70% of men are still in relationships and around 50% have sex at least once a week. Around 20% of men are sexless every year. So this is not a few top males with large harems. Maybe we get there eventually but I doubt it.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 09:13 PM
8

Relationships are about forming a specific, intimate, emotional bond with someone. If you don't actually have a bond its not really a relationship, its some form of coerced or forced interaction. So its impossible for someone to "deserve" a relationship because you either form a bond or you don't. And you can't "deserve" to form an emotional bond with someone because you can't control other's feelings. Some people really struggle to form bonds with others and some can do it easily. Life isn't fa…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 09:06 PM
0

I agree with that. My point is that people are being given the ability to procreate and ruining it by obsessing if their girlfriend secretly likes chad better.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 09:01 PM
–

Its not semantics. You are calling something slavery that isn't slavery. Use a different word if you don't want people calling you out.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 08:56 PM
-1

But its not unchangeable. Attraction can grow and shift.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 08:23 PM
3

I could say the same thing about you. You tell men that self-improvement and putting effort into their appearance won't help them in dating. That is equally as destructive.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 08:21 PM
2

I agree and thats also why its stupid when people say showing effort and interest is a sign you are an oofy-doofy and can't build natural attraction. "If she doesn't approach you first she will never find you attractive", "chad doesn't have to approach", is fairly common to hear in blackpill circles and leads men to just giving up completely.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 08:18 PM
2

How does that meet any definition of slavery? I guess you can say men are mistreated by society or discriminated but that wouldn't make them slaves. By the way you can say the exact same thing about black people with regards to bias in education, employment, criminal courts, healthcare, and cultural vilification. So are black people still enslaved?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 06:59 PM
1

I feel bad for these people. Believing these lies is not only dumb it prevents you from ever being happy. You are right though, at some point you have to give up and let them figure it out themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 02:12 PM
0

"The argument is that the men are betabuxx oofy-doofys who are about to get deadbedroomed." You haven't made an argument for this. Argument is premise, evidence, conclusion. You have the premise, where is the evidence?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 02:08 PM
1

So you either spend money and time and maybe fail and are miserable or you never try and are still miserable. I'd rather do the option that at least gives me some chance of success, you only get one life after all. Something guys definitely have control over is how they view themselves and their relationships. This is why I push back on a lot of the blackpill thinking because it create insecurities that make it impossible to ever be happy. BP thinking creates this world of insecurity where your …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 02:04 PM
1

Well only 15% of men are stepfathers so there is no way you are right. Also most stepfathers have kids of their own so the kind of thing you are describing happens to less then 5% of men. Also most women in their 20s are not mothers, and even after 30 being a single mother is rare overall. You have all these weird internet views that are not supported by any evidence or data. The numbers just do not make sense. There are not enough single mothers or stepfathers for most men in relationships to b…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 01:55 PM
5

The way plenty of dudes talk about it finding a partner is a matter of life and death. I see dudes saying they have no hope, are considering ending their lives, and are generally miserable over their lack of dating success. If not finding a partner will literally destroy your life and leave you miserable forever then its worth all the money and time you can possibly invest to avoid that.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 09:11 PM
1

Lol you say the GSS (one of the largest most validated public health surveys administered by the best researchers in the country) is too inaccurate but you come up with this. Very few men are victims of paternity fraud https://insidestory.org.au/the-fatherhood-myth/ This is a good article breaking it down. The number is likely between 1-3%. But you are saying "most" men are unknowingly raising another man's kid, so at least 50 percent?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 08:04 PM
2

They line up with STD data and there are many tools statisticians use to validate accuracy of results. https://datepsychology.com/is-self-reported-sexual-partner-data-accurate/ Yes the results aren't going to be perfectly accurate but they can provide general understandings of trends. The idea that 70% of men report being in relationships but really its 20% is just silly.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 07:56 PM
2

The 80/20 rule has never been demonstrated in any dating outcomes. More than 20% of men are in relationships (its around 45% for men under 30 and around 70% overall) More than 20% of men are sexually active (around 60% have sex at least a few times a month, about 20% are sexless every year). And AFBB has no real meaning. I have heard it described in 50 different ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 05:35 PM
1

Yeah most men can't get consistent casual sex with average or above women. You need to show some signs of commitment. If you don't want to commit then you have to be chad.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 03:03 PM
1

Many genetically average men don't meet the other requirements. They live with their parents or have a shit job or no hobbies or friends or never went to college.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 02:38 PM
-1

Average women will date average men but won't have casual sex with them. And I am talking average in "genetic quality" here average in facial structure and height. You need to have your shit together in terms of career and housing, education, fitness, which would make you above average overall.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 02:31 PM
0

If you are going after young, attractive women for relationships or average women for casual sex then you are competing with chad and brad. If you are willing to commit to average women or go after ugly and fat women for casual sex then you aren't competing with them. This is assuming you can get to around a 5 and have the other aspects of your life in order like career, place to live, etc. If you can't get yourself to a 5 your only option is committing to ugly women. That is still an option tho…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 02:19 PM
18

Maybe a 1 will become a 2 by changing his clothes and doing skincare. That is still improvement though. He is becoming more attractive. But would still need to do way more to meet the threshold.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 01:11 PM
-5

Its not about competing with chad its about making yourself more attractive. Dressing better and having clean skin does make you more attractive. Clean skin especially is a sign of physical health whereas having big pimples and acne is literally disgusting. Dressing well can help you fit into a niche dating market and just generally shows maturity. But yes you won't be more attractive then chad. The good news is that women don't only date chad. Try to maximize your potential and dressing well an…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 01:09 PM
0

Wouldn't getting rid of abortion make that worse? Now even more women would be forced to raise chad's kid and then need tax money to support it. Also most men aren't sexless and the ones who are are overwhelmingly in the under 30 age bracket which does not pay as much tax. So no most taxes are not paid by sexless men.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 01:03 PM
3

How are men slaves? I can't think of any definition of slavery that would fit the experience of the average dude. Unless you think slavery is just when you pay taxes.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 12:57 PM
1

My point is you can't assume its their fault just because they submitted the paperwork.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/25 04:00 AM
1

I never assumed that. All I said is that if they were married then that shows the guy wanted to commit initially. But relationships can fail for a multitude of reasons, and usually both partners are to blame at least partially.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/25 03:09 AM
1

Who filed the divorce doesn't tell you much about why the divorce actually occurred.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/25 03:02 AM
1

I was more thinking about what to do with the current situation you described, lots of single men and single moms. So its a little late for that. Also around 60% of single moms were married so for many its not an issue of the guy wanting to commit at least initially. But yes I would agree with the message of "don't have unprotected sex with a guy you aren't in an amazing relationship with"
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/25 02:35 AM
1

Hm well that seems like the logical solution if you have a large population of both single mothers and single men and you don't want either of them to be single.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/25 02:27 AM
1

I see, you are saying men should date single mothers. This way the single mothers are no longer single and the men aren't single. Interesting idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/25 02:04 AM
1

Men cheat more often than women (or about as often) so why is this a woman behavior?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/25 02:03 AM
1

My point was that women don't really care about wasting their fertility the same way a man would care about not making any money. As you pointed out, they don't actually get value from their fertility just the signals associated with it. So they aren't wasting the valuable aspect of their fertility.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/25 01:58 AM
1

If a divorce occurs within a college-educated couple it is more likely that the woman initiated it but overall college-educated couples divorce at much lower rates.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/25 01:52 AM
2

You get one life. If there are things that give you a better shot at living a good life then most people are gonna try even if success is not guaranteed. Especially if the alternative is to spend your one chance at life being miserable and impoverished.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 06:18 PM
1

Like you said, theres a gendered imbalance because women are poor at higher rates then men. So either we help women be less poor (meaning even MORE tax investment) or we cut off assistance to make it equal. What do you choose?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 06:16 PM
2

well because those men have committed crimes yea
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 06:15 PM
1

"those things are forcibly extracted from them and handed to women on a silver platter." What would a society look like where this wasn't the case? Are you saying labour, resources and protection should just be withheld from women or should we just get rid of the government entirely?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 06:03 PM
3

No its more like 40% for first marriages and this drops to around 25% for college educated women. Still a decent chance but why use this to judge all women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 05:02 PM
5

Why restrict your view to marriages that end in divorce if you are using that to pass judgements on all women?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 03:57 PM
7

Median first marriage length is 21 years. I don't think that lines up with the idea that "women never wanted to be wives" I think it moreso lines up with the idea that marriages often fail for a multitude of reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 03:49 PM
1

No its not the same because money is something you accrue over time and always need. Most women only want to be fertile in a small portion of their life so they can have 1-2 kids. Thats why they go on birth control. Everyone always needs money. And men don't actually care about fertility they want sex because sex feels good. So both men and women are hijacking our bodies' desire for reproduction to get something. Men get a good feeling without the risk of raising a kid. Women get that and the ab…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 03:14 PM
2

epitome of the just world fallacy right here
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 02:17 AM
1

"Why do you need to trust that won't happen? Why do you need her to be exclusive?" I literally said why, my preference for an exclusive relationship in both romantic and physical intimacy is because I believe that allows for the greatest and deepest connection and is a signifier of their commitment to forming that connection. Maybe that sounds like an excuse to you, I dunno why. I do need her commitment to be committed, I have explained that over and over again. We are just going in circles here…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 02:12 AM
1

We can agree to disagree on the first point. You are basically saying "its the thought that counts" and I agree with that to an extent but not with relationships. If someone isn't meeting my necessary preferences I don't want to date them no matter how hard they try. "Why is that your preference that no other man touches her?" If she is someone willing to violate my trust and stated commitments to an exclusive relationship then I don't want to date her because she is of poor moral character. It …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 09:11 PM
1

yes if you believe that every single time women hook up its with chad.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 05:07 PM
1

I agree that women aren't likely to settle for men they aren't attracted to. Therefore, if you are in a relationship with a woman she likely finds you attractive and being "boyfriend material" is not an indictment of your physical characteristics.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 05:06 PM
2

In an esoteric sense yes they are attached but practically fertility and sexual desirability are separate due to birth control. The use of makeup, plastic surgery, and digital filtering means that physical signs of aging can also be increasingly compensated for. Also if you consider the length of a woman's fertile window and the fact that the average woman only wants 1-2 kids then having some casual sex is not really that big of a deal in terms of "wasting fertility" especially considering at th…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 05:03 PM
1

Lol if you say so. I already pointed out how this way of thinking is really silly, women are not perfect hypergamy machines.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 03:41 AM
2

Yeah and I think in that case obsessing about "would she have hooked up with me 10 years ago" is pointless and destined to lead to insecurity. If she really thinks you are physically unattractive there are other ways to figure that out.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 03:22 AM
1

"If a woman has sex with you without earning your investment, it is often a compliment to your great genetic material." Or she could be drunk or young and stupid. I know tons of women who had sexual encounters they regret with guys they weren't that into. If you are in a certain subculture or social group that encourages casual sex then its easy to make dumb decisions. People act like women are these cold calculating hypergamy machines immediately locking onto the nearest chad to extract his see…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 03:08 AM
3

This gets tricky if a woman decides she no longer wants to do hookups. Is it the case that once she hooks up once now she needs to hook up with all subsequent boyfriends or else she doesn't really like them? Your view ignores that behavior and desires are not static, a woman might have different attitudes about sex at 21 than at 31. This doesn't necessarily mean she finds the men less attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 02:59 AM
2

It depends on the framing and who is saying it but I generally agree. People make a big deal about hookups online but relationships are what really matters emotionally in the grand scheme of things. Sure there are probably people out there still thinking about a former hookup but for the most part the people with the greatest impact (positive and negative) on our lives are those we form LTRs with. To pretend like being a husband and a father is inconsequential or meaningless whereas having a ONS…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 02:56 AM
1

"I probably would rather get somebody's best effort that's not as good as somebody else's worst effort." Yea I think thats silly but we can agree to disagree. I think thats being a chump, accepting worse treatment because "well she is trying her best". And I don't care if its in the bible lol theres lots of stupid stuff in the bible. If someone is cheating they are violating the terms of the relationship and my trust which is a major sign of disrespect and emotional neglect. It doesn't matter if…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/25 05:27 PM
–

If I found out that I could be paid 100k I would be mad at myself for not effectively advocating for something I need. But I behave the same in relationships, I take it as my responsibility to make sure my partner knows what my needs are and if they don't meet them I move on. What is silly is not listening to your own needs and basing your standards off a nebulous understanding of how they may have acted in the past. And what if someones best effort is literally worse? What if the best someone c…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/25 03:14 PM
13

Im not a big "go to therapy" guy but therapy is probably a good idea here. You have a delusional perspective on other peoples view of you.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/25 06:10 PM
3

If a woman approached you she is attracted to you but if she doesn't approach that doesn't necessarily mean she thinks you are unattractive. Easy proof. I bet you see attractive women all the time, how often do you approach them? What percentage of the attractive women you see do you actually approach? I bet its less than 1%. And yes men are less strict with their looks standards than women but the principle still stands, just because you didn't approach someone doesn't mean you think they are u…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/25 06:08 PM
1

I acknowledge I might have to put in more work than chad because chad is super hot and I'm not. There is no girl where this isn't true unless she is blind or something. But I don't see this as analogous to the work situation. A more analogous situation would be putting in more effort but achieving worse results than a colleague who breezes to promotions by talent and luck. In that case I would say that is life and some people are just gonna be better, no use worrying if I have everything I need …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/25 03:43 AM
1

Well if my partner has an active OLD profile then she is likely cheating which is against my preferences. I would never excuse that. "Maybe that relationship is only happy because you assume that she doesn't treat you worse than someone else and you are her one and only." No my relationship is happy because she meets all my needs and is a constant source of intimacy and affection who I can build a strong emotional connection with. Why would I care if she has the strongest feelings for me if she …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/25 03:17 AM
1

I think we hit on a fundamental disagreement. If I am getting everything I want, I don't consider it mistreatment if someone else got a better deal for themselves. There is no perfect job where everything is fair because thats not how life works. My goal is to make sure myself and everyone I care about get what we want/need, not investigate everyone else to make sure no one is doing better. Now to answer your questions: Q: What type of mentality would cause a male to behave like this? A: Behave …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/25 03:08 AM
1

Yeah I'm not gonna leave a great job because someone else has a better job. Maybe someone else has a better situation they don't deserve, the world isn't fair. There is also someone out there wishing they were in my position, too bad. "You are just pretending not to care" Lol ok, if you say so. If I felt the woman was worth pursing, then I would pursue her. If she was attractive, compatible, met all my needs in terms of intimacy and affection, then yeah I try and lock her down because she seems …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 10:10 PM
1

I disagree, isolation also impairs your ability to form lasting connections. I would bet the social guy can form much deeper and lasting friendships than the isolated guy. But being more specific, people get better at anything they practice, good and bad. If someone has done tons of hookups they are good at hookups, if they have been in LTRs they are probably good at managing relationships. So yeah if someone has reached the age of 35 and their longest relationship is 3 weeks but they have done …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 10:01 PM
1

Sounds like someone self-sabotaging due to internet ragebait. Again, if you are in a happy relationship that meets all your needs why fixate on the idea that the internet says she must have treated some other guy differently?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 09:58 PM
1

I think these are normal things that occur in the vast majority of relationships. I guess it depends on what you mean by "lots of" and "aggressively".
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 02:55 PM
0

Sounds like circular reasoning to me. "High n count decreases pair bonding and I know this because if women can't pair bond I assume they have a high n count"
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 02:50 PM
1

Who do you think will find it difficult to make new friends, an older person who has been alone most of his life or an older person who has had tons of friends and constant social activity? Its not a linear association between experience and "pair bonding" ability. I'd argue there is definitely a sweet spot that requires experience. Very rarely are peoples first friendships and first relationships their most meaningful. Experience gives us skills and knowledge that enable us to form stronger bon…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 02:44 PM
0

The average man isn't sexless...
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 02:45 AM
-1

Maybe he is more efficient and can get better results with much less effort? Working hard does not automatically equal success.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 02:43 AM
1

What does it mean for a woman to treat a man like a chad and a man to treat a woman like a stacy?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 02:41 AM
2

How do you figure out how a woman treated chad? If you are in a happy relationship that meets all your needs why fixate on the idea that the internet says she must have treated some other guy differently? I believe its useless to hold your relationships to the standards of what the internet claims "chad treatment" is. Focus on your own needs and only date someone who meets those needs.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/25 02:40 AM
1

I'd wait until commitment until having sex. That would filter out a lot of the player guys but yea its still possible to get bamboozled. If that happens just move on to the next.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/25 04:48 AM
0

It would be so easy. I would look for a LTR with someone who supported me and was affectionate. I'd want someone who was active physically (not necessarily muscular) and who had the drive to establish a career (not just interested in working entry-level jobs forever). As a woman I could probably find that in a week and never be single again.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 07:30 PM
1

They might sleep with the attractive misogynist while he is pretending to be a good guy but once his true colors come out the relationship usually ends (but the guy usually moves on before then). However I guess this is better than the unattractive good man who gets nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 08:15 PM
2

So no matter what age demo you date in only a very small portion will ever be suitable for LTRs?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/25 06:22 PM
1

Nope, I just want this to be an actual debate forum. Generally for a debate ideas need to fall in the boundaries of reality. If you approach a political debate forum with the idea that the government is run by lizard aliens you are just derailing all discussion and making it worse. Same thing if you approach a debate about dating with the idea that its biologically impossible for women to ever love 95% of men so all marriage and dating is actually fake. Its nonsense that just makes every discuss…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/25 03:31 PM
–

Is it ok for a chronically single guy to feel upset about it?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 03:21 AM
-4

This is why I advocate for harsher moderation towards incel/blackpillers. If someone is approaching the discussions from a severely misguided, inexperienced, and resentful perspective its better for them and the forum as a whole if they aren't allowed to participate. Endless discussions about how women only want the top 5% of men and how its biologically impossible for women to love a man under 6 ft are just dumb and make everyone upset.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 03:10 AM
–

Men are also entitled to those things.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 12:55 AM
2

yeah, actual qualities, not just a racial classifier. Thats what makes it different.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 12:52 AM
–

lol
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 12:48 AM
1

Maybe hes upset at himself.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 06:19 PM
0

I don't get this argument at all. They aren't dating the deadbeat dad, why would they be in the situation to be vetting his character? This post is about how men vet romantic partners and about how having kids leads to negative perceptions.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/25 12:37 AM
1

"Anything to not be alone every single night. No cost is too great, not even my soul" He said he would do literally anything, including enslaving all women, in order to get a slave wife. I was wondering if he was consistent.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 02:36 PM
1

"20% who wanted a relationship were currently single" I guess thats you. Never said every single med student got a relationship, only that generally being stable (good job, emotional intelligence, family minded, etc) actually makes you more desirable.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 12:10 PM
0

Would you kill 100 children if it ensured you would get a slave wife?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 04:57 PM
2

what is your standard for "ran through"? Either way, past partner count between partners correlates at .6 so people with more experience tend to date others with more experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 02:10 PM
3

The most stable men tend to get snatched up the quickest. The family-oriented men who get good jobs in their early/mid 20s or show lots of potential, they don't have as much of an issue dating. Only 9 percent of med students surveyed had never been in a relationship and only 20% who wanted a relationship were currently single. https://news.med.miami.edu/are-medical-students-in-love/#:~:text=The%20State%20of%20Medical%20School,never%20been%20in%20a%20relationship The idea that the average woman i…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 02:09 PM
1

No we aren't even close. The most skewed estimates still have 40% of young men dating. 5% is just goofy.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 09:16 PM
3

"Loser" men will be able to date "loser" women (single moms, obese, mentally broken, etc) however: By then a lot of men are just burnt out from rejection and no longer want to try AI girlfriends, porn, and the constant stream of content make it so you can easily fill your free time with sexually-gratifying and entertaining things. Dating is still a lot of effort, no matter who you end up with. If men don't feel its worth it then many will just give up.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 09:15 PM
1

There are still around 30 million surplus men.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 09:11 PM
2

I'm not very optimistic but I do come from a fairly biased place right now being single and young. I think America will likely follow a similar pattern as South Korea, we are just a little behind. Also the elitism around career is not as bad as SK but is getting worse as women get higher degrees on average. - I think AI chatbots will get fairly realistic and have already shown to be attractive to men AND women. I don't think its gonna become common but definitely more utilized - People will cont…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 09:09 PM
2

The "dating market" is different from an actual market because in an actual market sellers NEED to sell their products. Making gas 50/gallon would be silly because people would move to other sources of gas or energy. Yes, people need gas, but the suppliers also NEED to sell their gas. "Value" is the point at which supply and demand meet. The modern dating market is different as plenty of modern women value quality over the prospect of being alone. They would rather be alone or wait then settle f…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/25 04:41 PM
3

The enduring biological and social factors make it so its very difficult to sell men an idea of success that doesn't involve a relationship. The best we can do is extend the timeline, "Oh its normal to have your first girlfriend in your late 20s", "Its ok to be a virgin, that just means you are saving it for someone special". That is already sort of happening by necessity, I see it in how my parents (and their friends), and my co-workers discuss relationships, but soon the broader culture will c…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/25 04:04 PM
3

And by "valuable" I mean "worth showing affection to and creating a relationship with".
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/25 03:28 PM
4

The issue is women don't see male attention as valuable because they don't see the majority of men, either because of their intentions or their own capabilities, as valuable. Decreasing the amount of attention won't really fix that. You have to increase the quality of men. And by "valuable" I mean "worth showing affection to and creating a relationship with" not "valuable as a human being".
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/25 02:40 PM
2

What is the mainstream? Who exactly is pushing this message? Everyone is on the internet now, by age 13 you get tons of ads and recommendations for clothes, fitness programs, you see hot influencers, etc. I cannot imagine growing up in the last 20 years and believing that your physical appearance is not important.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/25 02:33 PM
3

Generally sexual activity correlates highest with sociosexuality (ones desire to have sex and openness towards sexual experiences), even moreso then attractiveness. The idea that not caring about sex leads to more sex is just wrong, usually the people who have the most sex really, really want to have sex. https://datepsychology.com/male-attractiveness-and-sexual-partner-count/
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/25 02:18 PM
4

Its definitely a confluence of social and biologial factors which makes it very difficult to just stop. There are clear biological reasons for this: - Men have more testosterone which increases desire for risky, casual sexual behaviors - Its much easier for a woman to get pregnant without a man (sperm bank, insemination, ez) then it is for a single guy to get a child Then there social reasons: - Men benefit more from relationships both in terms of mental health and social status https://x.com/ro…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/25 02:13 PM
1

You are assuming everyone has perfect knowledge of their options and no loyalty. Its possible the guy "levels up" without really understanding it and just thinks she likes him more from the familiarity effect (which is a thing and explains why persistence can lead to attraction). Its also possible the guy knows he leveled up but feels obligated to give her a chance because she gave him a chance while not being super into him.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 06:10 PM
1

"Chad" fucks from within the same pool of the 20% most promiscuous women. Thats what all the STD data, partner count, and app usage data indicates. The vast majority of women are not having casual sex with chad, but thats not necessary for chad to get laid, all he needs is a dedicated, promiscuous minority.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 09:57 PM
3

Thats not technically NSA, there are strings but they are easy to cut by ghosting the second you get bored or she wants something more serious.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 09:54 PM
8

You keep going back to this idea of "can you teach a college freshman how to pick up hot party girls in 10 minutes" but the topic of dating is much broader than that. The RP directly encourages men to engage in hookups and "spin plates" so its gonna have very specific advice on that which would be better than the mainstream standard advice. Thats what PUA has always been about, knowing how to target and seduce women for a easy lay, and it offers detailed scripts and guides to achieve that. In te…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 07:53 PM
1

"vaginal canal stitched up virgin" would be a great flair lol
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/25 01:38 PM
1

In what sense? In terms of baseline arousal, just making me horny, that would be the more attractive (harder to attract) women. Those kind of women I could jerk off to photos of them easily, for the other kind (easier for me to attract) that would be more difficult. However that didn't really affect my performance in-person. Attraction is deeper though, it reaches a personal level where you don't just find someone hot but actually like them and want to be with them. I have only felt that deep at…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 09:57 PM
1

When did I complain? I'm just describing how different people behave. I personally suck at texting so I don't really care if someone texts me every day. What I have found though is that if texting is infrequent (less than once a day) that usually means the woman has lost interest. In all my relationships my partner asked me to text them more, and then I could tell it was about to end when they stopped caring how often I texted. I am an extreme introvert who only dates other introverts. Regardles…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 09:48 PM
–

A lot of redpillers are dudes who have a big and very sensitive ego and took rejection really hard. For catharsis they buy into revenge fantasies about the women who rejected them becoming depressed cat ladies or single moms.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 09:10 PM
1

If texting someone once every other day or complimenting them 2 times over a 3 hour date sounds exhausting to you I dunno what to say. I'd guess its because you have a low opinion of men in general so the idea of doing anything nice to a man sounds extremely draining and substantial. But that goes towards my point, if a guy is actually liked then showing interest is less draining and exhausting.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 09:02 PM
1

Based on the average dudes romantic interaction with women "super proactive" means initiating conversations more than 20% of the time and actually texting first after dates. "Constantly complimenting" means like 2-3 compliments per date. "Very little attention" means days without responses or only tiny 3 word responses or just getting ghosted Nothing has to do with 24/7 attention. If you text a guy once a day you are giving him more attention than 90% of the other women hes messaging.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 04:37 PM
–

They are just assholes I guess. Not experiencing physical intimacy does suck and there really isn't a strong replacement.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 11:23 AM
–

Women hate the idea of having sex with unattractive men and the more you beg the less attractive you are so begging for sex is never the answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 11:17 AM
1

Dunno where you are getting the 24/7 part from. But I think if someone is not responding to messages and never plans a date its safe to say they aren't that into me.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 11:08 AM
–

Yea while sex is definitely important for a good life "plz I just need a friend I'm so lonely and have nobody even just to chat with" is much more sympathetic than "I NEED MY DICK SUCKED RIGHT NOW OR ELSE I WILL DESTROY SOCIETY".
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 04:42 AM
–

Mental health in young people is getting worse across the board but its definitely more drastic for young women I agree with that. For whatever reason though, (maybe the sexes really just don't trust each other anymore), young women don't see dating men as the solution (whereas young men seem to almost universally think dating women is the cure to their mental health issues).
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 04:05 AM
–

Thats not what loneliness means though. Should we call it a male sexlessness epidemic instead?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 04:01 AM
2

Well yeah she has to at least like you somewhat but attraction can definitely build and plenty of guys play the long game for a more hotter partner rather than date someone less attractive who is more attracted to them initially. Deciding what to do is on a case-by-case basis, often its best to give up but not always.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 04:00 AM
–

You are right but your evidence is incomplete. "Relative to women, (a) men tend to be more strongly focused on romantic relationship formation, (b) men tend to benefit more from romantic relationship involvement, (c) men are less likely to initiate breakups, and (d) men tend to suffer more following relationship dissolution." https://x.com/robsica/status/1872386667245695417 So not only do men want relationships more but they also break up less and suffer more following breakups.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 03:58 AM
14

Yeah it seems like over the course of a man's life education really makes no impact on whether they have kids or not. https://ofboysandmen.substack.com/p/men-without-children
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 08:55 PM
55

Yeah he thinks just because a man has a "provider mindset" (works at McDonalds but wants a family) a woman should pledge her entire life to raising his babies, including when she is most desirable, all for the chance that maybe he won't abandon her later leaving her with kids and 0 skills or work experience. And then he says all women who refuse are degenerate hedonists lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 06:08 PM
11

Being "provider minded" is meaningless. Lots of early-mid 20s guys want to be a provider and yet work at gamestop and smoke weed every day. The guys who actually are putting in the work to become providers, starting a business, going to college then grad school for law/finance/med/engineering/CS, etc, tend not to struggle. Only 9 percent of med students surveyed had never been in a relationship and only 20% who wanted a relationship were currently single. https://news.med.miami.edu/are-medical-s…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 06:05 PM
1

You seem to have the same mindset as a feminist who gets sexually harassed and then says "all men are rapists"
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 05:32 PM
20

Well when they do get a good option they tend to jump at it. Thats at least what I've seen. If a girl really likes you its usually very, very obvious. Though honestly this gives me more respect for guys who date women who aren't that into them at first and win them over, thats the real nightmare difficulty.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 05:30 PM
6

The women who treated me better were much less attractive and had less dating experience. Some of them even told me they thought I was a catfish at first because my profile looked so good to them. So I do think I was one of their best options. As for the other women yeah they are less interested but thats because an abundance of similar options prevents them from getting attached to any individual.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 05:28 PM
15

Yes because you are using "provider" as a indicator for "traditional man" when that is not the case. Its funny that for a man to be traditional he just has to make good money and want to get married but for a woman to be traditional she has to literally live like its the 1920s, getting married at age 19 with no education or job experience. These modern "provider men" are not nearly as religious, chaste, and community-oriented as a "traditional man" is expected to be. They also generally have at …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 05:24 PM
13

If you choose to surround yourself with hedonistic and promiscuous women thats a reflection of you as a person.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 05:16 PM
2

what do you believe then?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 12:53 PM
93

The amount of effort from the girl is related to where you stand among her other options. I could tell when I was a girl's best option, they were super proactive in texting, would ask to meet up without even needing a "date", and constantly complimented me. When I was in the average-tier (compared to her other options) I would get very little attention, ghosted frequently, and they would never plan a date. This makes sense to me, if you have an infinite supply of 6/10 dudes it doesn't make sense…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 12:43 PM
–

Women avoid boring guys for interesting guys. Its a lie that interesting guys are also aggressive and sociopathic, thats usually not the case.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 10:29 PM
–

The vast majority of hot guys (chads) are not sociopathic thugs, they are normal guys who are also hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 10:26 PM
–

Maybe thats what it means if you have delusional internet brain. The vast majority of women are not dating guys with histories of domestic abuse, face tats, and prison sentences.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 10:22 PM
1

I don't think you have to be an incel to see that women have a much easier time finding relationships and to be a little envious of it. The same way I can totally understand if women are envious that men are naturally bigger and stronger. Both are advantages to life. And yeah, a guy could tirelessly work on himself so he can easily find a relationship the same way where a woman could work out to the point where she is as strong as the average man. The point is that both are natural disadvantages…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/25 07:42 PM
1

I agree with this for the most part. Women do have a much easier time finding a relationship, and that is an advantage. Even if your life sucks in other ways (broke, unemployed, etc) it would still be better with a committed romantic partner giving you constant support and love.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/25 07:32 PM
5

People always say this even though its been proven that women get way more sexual requests AND relationship requests than men. If your average woman has 200 matches around 70 of them are dudes who want a relationship (around 40% of men say they use dating apps to find a LTR). The average guy in this comparison would be lucky to get 20 genuine matches total. The issue for women is figuring out which of those 200 matches want a relationship, which is exhausting and annoying and leads many women to…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/25 07:28 PM
0

Ok but I didn't say that women have it harder, I don't know why you put that in quotes as if it was something I said.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/25 02:42 PM
2

Yes but research shows fat women are equally picky about partner fitness as normal weight women so it doesn't help the chances of fat men.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/25 03:04 AM
73

"All modern women are spoiled and coddled from birth" "Men are women's slaves" "Women never feel lonely" "All women are set for life financially and can marry a millionaire" "Even extraordinarily ugly women can easily marry a man making 500k a year" These are not rational ideas. They are so warped and deluded that they obviously do not come from a place of logical assessment of the world. On any other sub this would be an over-the-top troll post but unfortunately we have to take this stuff serio…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/25 02:57 AM
2

Usually when people say OLD is a swamp they mean that everyone is either extremely sexual or low-value (terrible hygiene, unemployed, bad social skills, etc). I have never heard someone call OLD a swamp because "I just didn't personally like any of the guys I saw". None of this has to do with standards for a relationship, the idea of a swamp is that not only are the guys not worthy of a relationship, but the average guy on OLD is so horny and disgustingly pathetic that using the app feels like w…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/25 04:23 AM
8

The girl was maybe a little above average but nothing that extraordinary. The photos were given by a user of this subreddit I think, so it wasn't like he took the photos of a model or celebrity. It was a fairly average woman but she was white which is a pretty big advantage. All the 7 guys expressed interest in a relationship and offered to take the fake woman on a date. He said he could have gone further if not for the ethics of it. I don't remember one having a kid but sure, lets say he found …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 08:59 PM
–

hes gonna ignore this
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 03:29 PM
9

Its tricky because standards are increasing at the same time that the "quality" of the average man is decreasing. Men on average are more fat, make less money (relatively), have fewer friends, spend more time on video games / porn, and less social than ever. Its not just that men are putting in more effort for less results, though that does definitely happen. Plenty of men are also putting in less effort socially which has a massive impact on their dating prospects.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 03:24 PM
12

Yes this whole "dating for women is a swamp" thing has already been disproven even by people in this subreddit. A guy on here won a bet by showing that using an average womans pictures he got 7 dates in under 2 days with nice, put-together guys who wanted relationships. The post got removed by mods though for some reason. If you want a relationship as a woman you can easily find eager suitors who meet all the basic requirements (good hygiene, decent job, nice, not fat).
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 03:21 PM
1

Yes this whole "dating for women is a swamp" thing has already been disproven even by people in this subreddit. A guy on here won a bet by showing that using an average womans pictures he got 7 dates in under 2 days with nice, put-together guys who wanted relationships. The post got removed by mods though for some reason. If you want a relationship as a woman you can easily find eager suitors who meet all the basic requirements (good hygiene, decent job, nice, not fat).
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 03:17 PM
1

The major aspects of dating app elo systems are widely known. Additionally, you can ask tinder for your ranking and they will provide it. Swiping on everyone does lead to a low match rate BECAUSE you swipe on lots of people out of your league and who are not your type. Thats why I said to only swipe on people who you think you will match with. If you notice you are matching with super attractive women then good for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 02:11 AM
1

Your score is determined by your match rate and the match rate of people who swipe on you. Having a higher match rate means a higher score. Swiping on everyone leads to an extremely low match rate, even by tinder/hinge standards. It kills your account.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/25 10:46 PM
8

From a dating strategy perspective this is dumb. Reading the bio gives you an understanding of her basic personality archetype and interests, which influences whether she will swipe on you or not. You only want to swipe right on people you think will swipe back. For me, music choice was a big indicator, girls with similar music taste to me were much more likely to match so I prioritize them. Think about it, if you can identify traits that increase your match rate from 1% to 5% now you are gettin…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/25 02:48 PM
3

You can say that about all constructs of society, like money or government. Doesn't change the facts that these systems exist and influence our lives. And if you believe that women's rights are going away anytime soon you are just wrong. So if you want to actually help society then the only feasible solution is to make men more attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 10:41 PM
–

Its the only option that doesn't involve revoking women's political rights or access to equal financial opportunity.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 10:36 PM
–

how do you know this?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 09:24 PM
–

What percent of women do you think get "used by chad"?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 09:19 PM
–

How often does this happen?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 09:18 PM
–

Women naturally carry much higher bodyfat than men. So women generally need to put much more effort into being skinny then men. Your average thin and toned woman probably puts in as much effort into her body as a muscular guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 09:17 PM
–

If you want to help society understand that you can never bully women into dating men they don't like. The only option is to make men more attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 09:14 PM
1

I think the appeal for passport bros mostly boils down to two things: They have a infantilized and fetishized view of foreign women, seeing them mostly as sex objects who just can't resist them. They are super scared of divorce (which I understand tbh) and want to stack the deck in their favor. This means increasing their relative wealth and decreasing the likelihood that their wife even considers divorce an option. Going to a poorer country where divorce is socially discouraged accomplishes bot…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/25 12:31 AM
33

Wait but I thought most men were chronically single and can never get laid ever. What kind of men are you talking about?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/25 12:24 AM
–

Well yeah it can't refer any sort of cultural or religious tradition because passport bros explicitly seek women from different cultures and often different religions. They mean "traditional" in terms of the power dynamics within the relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 01:36 AM
–

What is "bullshit"?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 03:57 PM
–

Women also care about genetic quality. Thats why its harder for shorter and less attractive dudes to find dates. The idea that women only care about money is silly.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 03:55 PM
1

If you were correct then you would never see a single man who has money, but there are plenty of men with money who struggle to date. Its not just about being a walking ATM, things like physical attractiveness, emotional compatibility, charisma, also matter. Some women are gold diggers who literally only care about money but most women care about more than just that.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 03:53 PM
–

Men are only interested in women who will provide them sex. The idea that women don't have to provide anything is silly.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 03:47 PM
–

They are attracted to their looks because they want to have sex with them. If the woman doesn't provide sex then they are worthless. Either way someone has to provide something, either money or sexual access.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 03:45 PM
–

The only people who will love you unconditionally are your parents and your pets. This is true for men and women.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 03:43 PM
1

This is the most accurate response I've seen so far. Everyone else is way too pessimistic about OLD.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 10:06 PM
4

https://roast.dating/blog/tinder-statistics For Tinder: Men get on average 1 match out of 40 likes 52 % of men have less than one match a day 13 % of men have less than one match a week So around 50% of men get one match a day or more, 50% get fewer than one a day. Then the bottom ~15% get less than one a week
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 10:04 PM
1

I have studies with race and ethnicity but race stuff usually gets banned here. Also yes, you are sort of right about black women and white men, it is lower than white/white couples and white woman / black man couples.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 10:01 PM
–

"You can't justify loneliness by saying that some people are okay being lonely. The vast majority of mentally and physically healthy people have a craving for social relationships, romance and sex. This is a stable biological imperative." The first two lines of the post.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 08:42 PM
–

You are doing the exact thing the post is describing.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 07:56 PM
16

Thats not hypergamy, its totally reasonable to want a partner who is at least willing to work full-time as an adult. The income itself matters but moreso the fact that he just doesn't want to work and is willing to go broke over it. Thats not a very attractive trait especially for a LTR.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 04:46 PM
1

You should be doing that regardless of whether you are married but yes, thats a good idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:53 PM
2

True, doctors have under a 10% divorce rate. https://x.com/Ed_of_O/status/1883518810801791072 Married people consistently report higher levels of happiness than unmarried people. Unmarried people have similar happiness ratings as divorced people. Every lifestyle choice has risk, yes there is a chance of ending up in an unhappy marriage, but I would argue if you do want a happy, stable family marriage is the best way to go. Its kind of a catch-22 in that avoiding risk can be risky in itself. Avoi…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:52 PM
2

Education: https://divorce-education.com/divorce-rate-by-education-level/ Age: https://ifstudies.org/blog/want-to-avoid-divorce-wait-to-get-married-but-not-too-long/ Reasons for divorce: https://sanfordbehavioralhealth.com/2021/05/25/alcohol-divorce-drinking-ruining-marriage/ Weath/income: https://read.dukeupress.edu/demography/article/60/1/147/342803/Wealth-and-Divorce https://flowingdata.com/2021/05/04/divorce-rates-and-income/ https://x.com/Ed_of_O/status/1883518810801791072/photo/4 https://x…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:37 PM
1

More education leads to a lower divorce rate. There are definitely confounding factors (college graduates get married older and tend to have higher income), however, even controlling for some of the factors still shows an effect. Grad school > college > some college > high school diploma > high school dropout https://divorce-education.com/divorce-rate-by-education-level/ Controlling for confounds: https://x.com/datepsych/status/1846622969579426249/photo/1
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:35 PM
16

So theres an 80% chance of having a great life, family, etc. But lets dig into that 20% chance of divorce. Even in that case the marriage lasts usually around 20 years with 2 kids. Around 95% of divorces are described as amicable, combined with alimony only being awarded in 10% of divorces. https://www.wf-lawyers.com/divorce-statistics-and-facts/ Over 60% of men remarry and 90% say they would marry their spouse again. So I would say you have a greater chance of ruining your life if you stay unma…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 10:48 PM
15

Going from 0 to 40k income is as big a drop in divorce rate as from 40k to 400k. So even just getting out of total poverty is a massive reduction in divorce rate. Keep in mind the national divorce rate includes EVERYONE: drug addicts, abusers, totally broke people, cheaters, etc. https://read.dukeupress.edu/demography/article/60/1/147/342803/Wealth-and-Divorce
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 10:39 PM
29

Don't get married too young (or too old), get college educated, have over 40k income, and don't cheat, use drugs, or abuse your spouse. Now your divorce rate is around 20%.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 10:11 PM
2

what?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 07:59 PM
3

I don't believe in god personally. But god is a reason people choose to have kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 05:52 PM
2

- God says to - You want to pass on genes - You believe you can give them a happy life and teach them skills and morals which will impart happiness onto others
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 05:03 PM
6

Lol who said anything about inflating ego? But if thats the only reason you can think of to start a family you are making the right decision in avoiding it. The institution of marriage was designed to help people start families, if you don't want a family don't get married. But that doesn't reflect poorly on marriage, thats just not what it was designed for.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 02:48 PM
8

If you are college-educated, marry at ~30, have more than 40k income, and don't cheat, beat your spouse, or abuse drugs your divorce rate should be around 15%. Also your framing of "engine failure" is misleading. In the case of marriage being unmarried (or not going on the plane in your hypothetical) potentially has major consequences as well. Never-married people are less happy, fulfilled, and less likely to maintain a stable family. Aside from the correlations with lower happiness and fulfillm…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 02:39 PM
18

How do women get "all the money"? Alimony is only awarded in 10% of divorces, the average child support payment is $700 a month, and women generally fare much worse financially in divorces than men.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 01:27 PM
14

Its more like 25% for college-educated people. But if you are college-educated, marry at ~30, have more than 40k income, and don't cheat, beat your spouse, or abuse drugs your divorce rate should be around 15%. Keep in mind these population-level divorce rates include cheaters, abusers, drug users, extremely poor people, etc. If you can avoid doing those things your divorce rate will already be much lower than the overall population. Also, when considering marriage you have to consider the outco…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 01:19 PM
3

Using population statistics for divorce is very stupid. Population statistics say that over 50% of men are overweight and weak but would you tell someone "oh don't bother working out, you are just gonna be fat and weak". No, because individual choices and circumstances matter. And you see this in the data as well. People with a college degree have a 26% divorce rate, compared to a 45% divorce rate for people with less than high school. https://divorce-education.com/divorce-rate-by-education-leve…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 12:51 PM
3

because its not, its an abnormal circumstance
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 02:39 AM
3

I have seen plenty of MGTOW people generally endorse solitary lifestyles and encourage men to give up on forming relationships. Some MGTOW advocate for distancing yourself as far from society as possible until it is better for men. Every MGTOW person doesn't do this, but I would say MGTOW is a community that does occasionally justify loneliness.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 06:11 PM
1

The only people who I see directly justifying loneliness are people who intend to be lonely themselves (MGTOW guys, women who don't care about dating, etc). Otherwise, the debate isn't whether chronic loneliness is normal, its about the reasons loneliness occurs. No one thinks a lonely, 40-year-old virgin is "normal" its more who should accept responsibility for his condition. How much is it women's high standards versus factors within his control?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 05:46 PM
1

A need for what? What are our goals as a society? Do we want a society of happy, fulfilled people? Does that matter?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 04:43 PM
1

A need for what? Just saying "need" lacks context. What is it needed (or not needed) for?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 04:20 PM
3

yep. Anyone who wants to force people to have sex is a monster.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 04:17 PM
3

Do you think as a society we should create structures to help people achieve "good lives"? That could be subsidized college education, community social groups, etc Or should we consider someone fully taken care of as long as they aren't dead?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 03:58 PM
2

In my experience telling someone who has never experienced love or emotional intimacy to "grow the heck up" hasn't helped.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 03:44 PM
2

Yes, but need for what? If we are talking needs for survival you are generally correct. But if we expand that to "what is needed for a good life" its not as universal.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 03:41 PM
0

The vast majority of people need access to sex and emotional intimacy to have a happy and fulfilled life. Some people can fully meet their needs through friends and family but some can't and require a romantic partner to feel emotionally fulfilled. Being emotionally fulfilled and happy is not a "need" in the sense that it is not required to maintain the basic biological functions of survival but for many a life without it is not worth living. Maybe they should get over themselves and stop being …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 03:27 PM
3

You aren't gonna die without sex but the vast majority of people need sex and intimacy to have a good life. Thats why its sad tons of young people are giving up on dating. At least 90% of those people will seriously regret it later.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/25 02:38 PM
1

I don't think that is true but for the people it does apply to it is a very sad situation. For those people their issues go far beyond their knowledge of seduction, they likely need therapy or some sort of counseling.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/25 09:56 PM
2

Lol I literally said thats what friends are for. You don't have to work this out alone, your friends are there going through the same issues as you, your parents are there to provide help. My point is that you have to set your direction, its not on your parents to plan out your seduction strategy.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/25 04:11 PM
3

No not really. Parents have an obligation to exemplify positive examples of relationships for their kids but its stupid to expect parents to be able to navigate youth dating culture when they have been detached for so long. Thats what your friends are for. Its really on the individual to figure out what kind of person they are and their ideal dating scenario. You figure this out through living, making friends, trying hobbies, and your parents can't do that for you. I agree they should encourage …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/25 08:20 AM
2

https://x.com/DKThomp/status/1886411787693621649 “men’s odds of being in a relationship today are still highly correlated with their income. Women do not typically invest in long-term relationships with men who have nothing to contribute economically.” https://x.com/datepsych/status/1861142314212827331/photo/3 About 45% of poor men are married compared to around 65% of upper middle class men and 75% of rich men. Having a good career helps immensely with dating success.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/25 04:14 AM
1

Oh wow so now meeting through friends does lead to relationships but the women secretly aren't attracted. This is just delusional. Its worthless to keep talking to you. Bye
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 07:26 PM
1

The religious person would say serving god is objectively good, because they believe god determines objective morality. I don't think objective morality exists, the religious person sees it as objectively good. But if you agree with me that objective morality and judgement doesn't exist then you can't say anything is objectively good or bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 07:21 PM
1

The actual surveys and studies show that meeting through friends is possible and leads to stable relationships. Thats also what I have seen with my friends and family. If you choose not to believe that, ok. I am done trying to convince you.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 07:18 PM
1

I don't know what you should do personally. My point is that approaching in person works sometimes. Do whatever you want. However, you are also wrong when you say meeting through friends doesn't work. It actually leads to more stable relationships than meeting online. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0747563223003242 "Online daters reported less satisfying and stable marriages, a phenomenon we refer to as the online dating effect."
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 07:12 PM
2

Objective results carry a subjective sense of value which differs depending on your moral philosophy and individual perspective. A religious person might find a lot of value in having a family because it helps him serve god, etc
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 07:09 PM
1

because you say so it must be true. But actual research shows young people date their friends fairly regularly. "Today's young adults, especially young women, are increasingly finding romance in their friend groups. In our survey, 43% of people between the ages of 18 and 29 said they were in a relationship with someone who was first a friend, including an astonishing 50% of women in that cohort. This is double the 21% of people over 65 who reported having been friends with their partner or spous…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 07:05 PM
1

In person isn't that high effort either. Either way you are approaching. If you think approaching in-person isn't worth your time then fine. Different things work for different people. You seem to think approaching in-person literally never works which just isn't true. Maybe cold approaching on the street is nearly impossible but meeting through friends or at events is viable.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 07:00 PM
2

For some people the objective result of having kids and a family is very valuable.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:56 PM
1

You approach women if you want to talk to them, maybe because you are interested in dating them. I don't see a massive difference between in-person approach and apps. Either way you are trying to initiate conversation to see if she will date you and the vast majority of time it doesn't work. Both apps and in-person approach give women an "ego boost". If you think you might want to date someone try to talk to them. Thats how its worked since forever. Thats what our dads and granddads did.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:53 PM
5

I don't know anything about laws in Europe, my advice and perspective is geared towards the US.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:50 PM
1

Ok then I guess basically everyone I know is ugly. But we all got relationships and sex by approaching, either through friends, apps, or in person. When you survey men in relationships the vast majority say they made the initial approach. If you wanna call that losing then ok.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:47 PM
2

Well to them having kids might be worth it. Its all about subjective desires really.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:44 PM
4

Can you link any evidence of this happening? I tried to look it up and I got nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:43 PM
1

If you want to date, approaching women is part of "fixing yourself". It doesn't happen after or before.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:41 PM
1

Maybe we have different definitions of approach. By approach I just mean proactively talk to woman and ask them out, not wait for them to come to you. Basically every guy needs to do this. Getting approached by women is very rare. And like I said before, I would rather "lose" by asking women out and getting relationships and sex than never approach and never get relationships or sex ever.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:39 PM
5

Name one time an ugly guy has been thrown in prison for hitting on a hot woman
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:37 PM
2

what if they really want kids and a family?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:36 PM
1

Ok find a woman who finds you attractive. If thats impossible then at least you tried. Or you can never try and guarantee you will be alone forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:30 PM
8

Has an ugly guy ever been sued for hitting on a hot woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:23 PM
1

What if the dude doesn't want to leave the country? Is dating hopeless?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:22 PM
3

Its very simple, being social and learning how to flirt is an essential component of self-improvement. If you are just working out and building your career you are not doing "self-improvement" correctly. You need to be leveling up your social skills and flirting at the same time. Maybe its useless if you are extremely obese and jobless or literally mentally ill or addicted to drugs, but once you get past the self-improvement stage that makes you a functional human (most people are there already)…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/25 06:21 PM
1

I got access to the article through my college so I can't link a pdf. Here is an excerpt of the methods: "Our attractiveness measures included: (1) self-ratings of overall physical attractiveness on a scale from 1 to 7 (the question read, “How physically attractive would you say members of the opposite sex think you are?”; participants were given a scale from 1 to 7 where 1 was labeled “Not at all attractive,” 4 was labeled “Average,” and 7 was labeled “Very attractive”); (2) ratings by ten oppo…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/25 12:59 AM
1

I disagree on the guaranteed rejection thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/25 12:00 AM
1

photo ratings by opposite-gender peers also BMI and chest/waist ratio together are decent measures of attractiveness. High BMI and low chest/waist ratio is unattractive whereas high BMI high chest/waist ratio is attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:55 PM
1

There is basically no chance of getting arrested or assaulted for approaching a woman. Just doesn't happen. The cases I have heard of are pickup artists who stay in one place and approach women all day (they get asked to leave) and that one kid in the UK who stalked a girl and tried to hug her. Warm approaches are not a guaranteed rejection for 95% of men but we can agree to disagree on this one.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:55 PM
1

They used: Face photo ratings, body mass index, and chest-to-waist ratio for men face photo ratings, body mass index, and waist-to-hip ratio for women
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:43 PM
-1

Its not a guaranteed rejection. And 75% of women under 26 said they wanted to be approached more. Cold approaching is very difficult but warm approaching is very viable. You just need a social circle and hobbies. Theres actually very little risk and very high reward.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:41 PM
2

Like I said, I think its immoral to socially pressure people to date people they don't find attractive. And you still haven't proven why women's natural advantages are immoral, you have said it leads to lonely men which harms society but you haven't justified why women have a moral obligation to love these men.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:36 PM
1

If these men are single its for a reason. Maybe they don't try or they do go on dates but can't create attraction. Either way they need increase their attractiveness or try harder. Just telling women to lower their standards won't magically make these men attractive. So no, you are not being reasonable. What is the solution to lonely men that would be less detrimental to society? So far all I have heard is telling women to lower their standards, which wouldn't work.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:30 PM
0

Thats an awful mindset. 99% of men would be single forever if they believed that. I'd rather "lose" by approaching women and getting dates and sex than never get dates or sex ever. I think thats a bigger loss.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:23 PM
2

Sociosexuality did not correlate with attractiveness but does correlate with lifetime partner count. https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2007-07458-008
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:21 PM
2

The studies did control for it. They found that attractiveness did not correlate with sociosexuality but that sociosexuality correlated with lifetime partner count. https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2007-07458-008
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:19 PM
1

What does this have to do with womens natural advantages being immoral? You are saying "women have the natural advantage that men find them attractive" So... "its immoral for women not to date these men because then it makes these men lonely" But you are framing love as charity. No one deserves love, you have to earn it. Just because someone finds a woman attractive doesn't entitle them to a date. Women should not be shamed for refusing to date men they don't like.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:16 PM
1

What do you suggest?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:11 PM
2

Ok but also allowing people to choose their romantic partners is a moral good. There might be negative consequences to those decisions but allowing the choice is more moral than the alternative.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:04 PM
0

if you don't ever approach women its very hard to date one, yes
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 11:00 PM
–

So women choosing not to date their "match" is immoral? How so?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 07:53 PM
0

I know that no individual decides how difficult dating IS My question is who decides how difficult dating SHOULD BE
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 07:18 PM
–

I think we can agree rape is immoral. Whats immoral about women choosing who they date?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 07:12 PM
–

Do you see no difference between freedom of association and forced association? Scenario 1: A really strong guy uses his natural advantages to defend himself against an attacker Scenario 2: A strong guy attacks someone weaker and holds them hostage Both are people using "natural advantages" to achieve their goals, but would you say both actions are morally equal?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 07:11 PM
-6

Who gets to decide how difficult dating should be?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 06:57 PM
4

Good post, people underestimate how much the decline in socialization plays into dating success. Young men 18-24 spend around 60% of their free time alone compared to 45% for young women. This is a increase from 40% in 2004. From: https://www.ft.com/content/23053544-fede-4c0d-8cda-174e9bdce348 About half of young men report never approaching a woman in person https://datepsychology.com/risk-aversion-and-dating/ Studies on correlates of body count show extraversion and alcohol use are actually hi…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/25 06:56 PM
2

I hope you have a good life as well Also, cuck has really lost all meaning huh
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 07:40 PM
2

Ok but you still agree that men should show emotion sometimes. There are "approved" emotions. So saying men should show emotion sometimes isn't insane. Also, being sad sometimes is ok. Everyone gets sad, if women just hated it then no relationship would last.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 06:28 PM
3

You think its insane because your brain is poisoned by internet stories, stories which you lack context for and receive one biased perspective and could just be fake too. Showing emotion is an obvious part of a relationship. Passion and love are emotions and its normal to be angry, sad, etc sometimes. Have some critical thinking for a second. I'm not saying you should be crying all the time or never hold back emotions. Theres a time and a place for things. But saying "NEVER show emotions to wome…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 05:57 PM
11

No because the goal isn't to get followers to recruit others, its to get followers to believe they are in a special club that offers them the only chance at success. The goal is to isolate the person from everyone around them (your parents/teachers are bluepilled and beta, etc) to get them to fully buy into their schemes and give them all their money.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 02:51 AM
1

Thats a reasonable perspective. But when I think of young men engaging with the "red pill" its much more often the youtube slop vs the "field of study" aspect.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 12:01 AM
3

Men talking and hanging out isn't necessarily "redpill", what are your examples of redpill spaces? Any example you can give me, the tate and F&F communities are 1000x larger. You can call them grifters but it doesn't change that fact. I'm all for men sharing experiences with each other and being supportive, thats not what the modern redpill is about, thats not what young men are currently being drawn to. And yeah that therapist is fucked up.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 10:52 PM
4

yes
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 10:48 PM
19

They are sometimes very explicit about this. Andrew tate brags about scamming loser men and stealing girlfriends. F&F brags about how much more action they get than their fans, its a sales tactic partially. Its a multi-pronged assault on the ego that breaks you down by making you feel inferior, telling you how much better they have it, but then reminding you its possible to reach their level, you just need to buy their course.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 10:20 PM
1

The redpill doesn't talk about healthy ways of emotional expression. Just because people use it as a venting forum doesn't mean its received well. The reason I mention Tate and F&F is because they are the most popular redpill voices by FAR. Rollo tomassi is nothing compared to the reach and fanbase of those guys. The modern redpill message is about getting as rich as possible. None of their content or messaging is about going to college or trade school and getting a nice job, its all about start…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 10:17 PM
1

? I don't know what you are asking
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 10:11 PM
6

Yes this is very true. The happiest demographic in all of society is married men in management positions with 2 kids. Lots of "depression" in men is just failure to thrive. Unfortunately, many lack the tools to achieve success on their own.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 09:05 PM
1

Most upset men don't want therapy. They hate their lives and want to improve. Some are genuinely trying, some get convinced by tate that its feminism's fault and they cry about it. It is literally a skill issue. The happiest demographic IN ALL OF SOCIETY are successful (management positions), married men with kids. But if you can't achieve that then life is pretty brutal.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 08:59 PM
17

I'd believe this if it wasn't for the fact that redpill spaces actively reinforce the stoicism and emotional rigidity that you claim is the issue. According to redpill guys NEVER show emotions to a woman but they also never talk about healthy ways of emotional expression among friends. This is because the redpill ideal is a muscular, rich guy with 5 girlfriends who is never sad or upset because he is winning at everything. According to redpill guys like Tate and F&F if you are failing to meet th…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 08:56 PM
3

In the hypothetical he asked and she agreed because she wanted the dick. Then another guy comes along and seems like he wants a relationship. So they end up taking longer to have sex. The guy then gets mad that she didn't have sex with him as early as the other guy. But the approach for a hookup is different than that for a relationship. A hookup is all about sex, so sex happens right away. When you are vetting for a relationship personality and chemistry matter a lot more, so that stuff gets wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 03:01 AM
–

The point is that if you don't ask for a hookup don't expect the same sexual experience as a guy who asked for a hookup.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 02:43 AM
–

If you are an adult with an adult salary spending $50 a week on a date shouldn't really be that big of a deal. Also, you aren't just paying for the potential for sex, you are facilitating the potential for a long-term relationship that involves deep emotional bonding and intimacy and could lead to kids and marriage. If you literally just want sex better off seeing a prostitute. Then you can spend your money and be sure you will receive sex in return.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 02:37 AM
1

Are those women worth it?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:09 PM
2

You really missed the military alliance part. Poland Finland Norway Sweden Romania Germany Italy and Hungary are all in NATO. Taiwan is fucked but its not really a country. I wouldn't consider South Korea or Japan feminist.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 05:01 AM
0

I don't know anyone who fits all of those criteria but I know plenty of people who get laid consistently or are in relationships. I think you just have a warped view of the world. Also generally ~80% of men have sex at least a few times a month.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 04:57 AM
2

All the liberal feminist countries either have nukes or are in military alliances with countries that do They aren't getting invaded anytime soon. More likely they collapse from internal pressures than get invaded.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 04:52 AM
6

A whole provider? Just pay for dinner dude.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 04:44 AM
3

Ukraine voluntarily gave away their nukes in 1991 with the Budapest memorandum on security assurances. Literally the worst example you could use because it perfectly proves my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 04:42 AM
3

their crime rates increase too
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 03:28 PM
11

If you think casual sex is destroying society and then make your identity around having lots of casual sex you are either just a bad person or a hypocrite.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 03:22 PM
10

Looking at this from a conservative framework: The idea is that eventually they will have kids and the woman will do most of the work in raising them and do all the chores. Also, because of necessity, the woman will probably be working at least part-time as well. It makes sense for the man to invest more initially.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 03:21 PM
4

Regression to the mean, the children of immigrants tend to have views closer to the average American than their parents. As long as the immigration is gradual enough to allow for assimilation its not a big worry.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 03:19 PM
7

We have nukes. Countries don't just "get invaded" anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 03:17 PM
1

Yes, no one would dispute that increased physical attractiveness can also lead to more positive ratings on a variety of personality and competence metrics. My question, which the studies you linked don’t address, is whether the reverse is true. Can an increase in positive personality traits lead to greater attractiveness? Some research says yes: “Gross and Crofton presented a photograph of a (fictional) female student attached with verbal descriptions of her personality. Male and female particip…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/25 04:21 AM
–

My argument is that its very possible to find relationships through friend groups. Some studies found that around 40% of young men were friends with their partners and some have it has high as 68%. According to pew around 56% of people 18-29 met their partners through friends/family or at school, compared to 21% who met their partners online. https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/08/20/a-profile-of-single-americans/ So while lots of young men are single, the ones that aren't single ofte…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/25 03:09 AM
–

You basically said the same thing over and over: I am overestimating the ability for men to date their friends My statistics around friends was focused on close friends and doesn't account for casual friendships Dating apps are also viable and allow you to interact with lots of people in a shorter amount of time I believe I addressed all 3 of those points. Now for the new stuff: - When I say socialized 10x more I was speaking generally to the average person complaining, not you specifically. - T…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 10:52 PM
3

Presumably they do work full time just not in a good enough job to support a family.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 08:00 PM
7

Yes this is true. It was hypothesized that as women became more educated and started earning more they would care less about the man's money and status. However, most women, no matter their education or income, are unwilling to date down in income or educational attainment. Highest degree attained is actually one of the strongest predictors of relationship choice. Also everyone's expected standard of living is very high. We generally expect to have a few nice vacations a year, multiple cars, a h…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 07:58 PM
1

So your one experience of hearing a cheating wife refer to her husband as "safe" means that any time someone thinks of their partner as "safe" it means they are planning on cheating on them? How high do you think the chance is?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 06:06 PM
-2

How do you know whats genuine attraction and whats not? Do you think personality traits (like being funny, charming, etc) and displays of competence (good at sports, playing an instrument, etc) can't create attraction? Is attraction really only about your facial structure and height?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 05:28 PM
2

*now I see I should have worded my reply better* What is your evidence for this?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 05:25 PM
2

Do you have any evidence for this?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 05:21 PM
2

So this goes back to the idea that everyone agrees with: "If your partner is not meeting your needs find a new partner" I don't know what this has to do with being a "second choice" or "safe"
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 05:17 PM
–

*busy with life so Im responding now* I don't believe I ever made any statements about the exact chance you can find a relationships with a friend. The data on it is variable, some studies have that 45%/~30% split for men and women, some have it at around 75%. My point isn't that it guarantees success, just that it provides a viable option. As for social groups, both close friends and total friends are decreasing. I found the close friend metric striking because its gone from 10 average in the 1…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 05:14 PM
2

Except when questioned you have given no way for someone to figure out if he is really getting "the maximum" or being treated like a prize. You just say, "its about whether you feel it or not". So in your perspective the overly neurotic guy is justified in exploding his relationship because he feels his partner is settling. What standard does he have to judge it other than his own feelings?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 04:56 PM
1

Everyone agrees people should avoid bad relationships. Where it gets tricky is when the "bad relationship" label is applied to every time the girl has more than 2 past partners. The logic is: She has past partners -> she liked them more than you -> she is settling -> therefore she will cheat and divorce you So you can frame it as "avoiding bad relationships" but its an extreme negative bias assuming the worst of every situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 04:50 PM
4

Whats your evidence that most women were never attracted to their husbands?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 04:43 PM
-1

Whats a low body count? If you are over the age of 25 and looking for a virgin thats gonna be very difficult.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 04:40 PM
1

Whenever this comes up you see a range of positions from reasonable to extremely insecurity. Reasonable: "I want a partner who meets all my needs" Crazy: "If your girlfriend has ever had an ex then you are their second choice and shouldn't date them" The crazy stuff generally comes from two sources: Feeling like the girl doesn't really love you and is just settling A belief that she liked her past partners more and gave them better treatment I call it crazy because in this mindset her actions do…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 04:37 PM
1

Thats an interesting story you made up in your head.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 01:27 AM
2

This sounds like mega cope to me. Married men report being happier than unmarried men every time this is studied. To a large extent our brains and drives were shaped by the desire to reproduce. The idea that a guy whos alone forever is generally happier than the dude who has kids and a wife just seems silly on its face and never manifests in the aggregate, only anecdotes.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 01:22 AM
2

Married men tend to report being much happier and satisfied with life than unmarried men. The most happy demographic are married man in management positions with 2+ children.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 01:18 AM
1

What about the math is wrong? Maybe you see lots of guys in social groups, but social participation is trending down. The average man has only 1 friend. How can all these social spaces be fully saturated but also most guys are not socially active? My main point with those numbers about dating is that it shows plenty of young women are open to dating people within their social groups, its not only about finding people on apps. The issue is that fewer young men and women are actually serious about…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 12:44 AM
1

Casual sex is not as frequent as you think it is. Rates of sexual activity are actually dropping and are the lowest for gen z (both women and men) of any other recorded generation. But yes, gender expectations have definitely shifted in a way. Men are still expected to outearn the woman but are no longer expected to be the sole earner. However, there is a much greater expectation for men to invest emotionally in the relationship and to contribute to chores and childcare. I'd actually say this is…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 06:32 PM
1

thanks
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 06:29 PM
1

Its called getting at the heart of our disagreement. It seems we agree that being more social puts you in contact with potential dating partners, but you think it doesn't matter because women are too picky so you will always get friendzoned. So now we need to figure out how picky women really are to see if you are right, thats why I asked you for more details. I'll be more specific: If the average guy genetically (5'9, average face) looksmaxxes to a good extent (lean, good fashion, good grooming…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 02:46 PM
1

I am talking about this in the context of dating. Usually when people say that they mean modern dating takes more work and results in a lower quality partner. This post was to give an explanation why that is the case and to see what lessons we can take from this time where dating was apparently easier.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 02:42 PM
4

Can you actually define who you are talking about? I looked around and some sources say only 16% of Americans are working "low skill" jobs, however they define it. So should people working low skill jobs not have kids or anyone in the bottom 50%? Because I think those are two different groups. But generally, I think the vast majority of Americans are happy they are alive. Life can be hard, yes, but theres also plenty of things to make it meaningful and fun. I think its a definite stretch to say …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 05:21 AM
-1

I am a 22 year old 5'10 guy so no. How attractive do you need to be to have any dating success? I'm curious about where you think the bar is and how "delusional" womens standards really are.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 05:15 AM
2

Well the issue is that lots of men have nothing. No friends, no girlfriend, no social groups. The average gen z guy is single and has 1 friend. I agree with you, social interaction is important, and it doesn't have to be in the context of a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:49 AM
2

People are pickier because there is more competition for your time and everyone is more neurotic and anxious. Why go out with people you don't like that much when you could just watch netflix and order a pizza? Why go to a party that is gonna be loud and crazy and full of people you don't know (who might be mean to you) when you could just watch pizza and eat netflix?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:46 AM
4

I care too, I like HighestTierMaslow and all the other yappers around here. Its fun to read a massive paragraph of spite and bitterness sometimes.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:44 AM
4

The economy and society needs low-skill workers. Not everyone can have a "great career" and thats ok. You can have a good life without having a great career (depending on your definitions, I guess). We are not at the point where AI can take over everything.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:41 AM
3

Wait, thats the point of this post though, that joining social groups is good. Looks like we got there in the end folks.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:39 AM
2

Im glad. I'd be a terrible father right now.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:35 AM
4

When you are looking at the individual level variance in personality type is going to lead to massive differences in experience. However, if you zoom out to all of society you can see clear downward trends in socialization and social milestones. I linked a bunch of the data in the post if you want to check it out.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:35 AM
1

- Being socialized will help you understand how to become attractive in other ways, putting you in contact with attractive men you can use as reference. Joining workout clubs and sports leagues can help you get in shape too - Opening up your social circle gives you more chances to meet genuinely interesting women - You might get treated like a creep, but I'm sure you are more likely to be seen as creepy if you are an absolute stranger vs someone who they kinda know from being part of their socia…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:33 AM
6

In some aspects the bottom 50% of society actually has higher fertility. This person is not asking for natural selection, they are asking for a social mandate that people in the bottom 50% are encouraged to not reproduce. If this happened naturally then we wouldn't even be having this conversation, it would just be a given.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:29 AM
2

Both genders are becoming increasingly antisocial. I see no evidence that women are inherently only attracted to a select percentage of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:26 AM
5

Unfortunately mental health outcomes are in the toilet. Can men "walk off the plantation" without sacrificing their happiness?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:24 AM
3

yes https://x.com/KirkegaardEmil/status/1875736933101662656/photo/2
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:23 AM
3

thanks
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:21 AM
7

I dunno man, I've had a 6 pack for a while and people can't see it through my clothes so unfortunately no approaches. Its helped once I got the shirt off (by then I was 95% of the way to sex anyways) but it was nice to see the look on their faces. All this to say, don't give up approaching. Dating is gonna be nightmare difficulty if you aren't putting yourself out there.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 01:53 AM
5

He did have it easier. So... what now? I'm 22, I was a virgin at 21 so pretty similar situation. What do we do?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 01:48 AM
8

When surveyed around 45% of young men had not asked out a woman in the last year. And before people claim MeToo, the major reasons given were fear of rejection and lack of interest, not fear of being cancelled or arrested. Pretty big shift.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 01:45 AM
2

There are some interesting characters popping up on this thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 01:38 AM
3

Maybe pursuing "free love" isn't the solution then. You made some great points regarding all the economic and political factors that made the 60s and 70s extraordinary but maybe there are still some lessons to take, even if they are more abstract. We have been dissociating from each other as a society, communities falling apart as in-person socialization becomes less frequent. Maybe we can't bring back love for everyone, but resurrecting some sort of social infrastructure seems like a good step …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 01:37 AM
5

I wish the entire country had the experiences your family did. Unfortunately, it seems like young people are having less sex and relationship experience than ever. The question is whats the message for my generation. Do we fall into blackpill despair (women only want 10% of men, give up) or do we try to take lessons from history and focus on improving social structures?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 01:33 AM
11

I don't think its best for our country if 50% of people don't reproduce. You realize this means that women in the top 50% will have to have 4 kids on average or else the population will be cut in half every generation?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 01:29 AM
0

Can you say that like a normal person? What do you mean by "run the clock out" in this case? These are college students, they aren't approaching "the wall" unless its massively shifted since I last checked.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 01:28 AM
7

I mentioned that in my post, people tend to gravitate more towards solitary, internet-based hobbies nowadays. I don't think anything has changed genetically, yeah we diagnose autism more often but I don't believe there is this massive proportion of society that just suddenly can't handle socialization. More likely that we are all out of practice.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 01:26 AM
5

lol for some reason I assumed everyones grandparents grew up in the 60s like mine. My post is mostly geared towards that time period as thats what the research I've read focused on. Hearing about the 40s and beyond is definitely cool though, there are lessons to take from every point in history. The shrinking of families is an interesting topic, especially considering how around 1 in 4 people are currently being raised by a single mother. The differences in socialization between having 0-2 sibli…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 12:57 AM
5

And I was more approaching this from the perspective of someone in my early 20s. I'll admit I definitely have less understanding of what a social life is like past 30 and especially past 40.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 12:01 AM
2

Thanks for the thoughtful response. It would be interesting to hear what you consider the qualities of a "good option" to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 11:47 PM
17

So eugenics. Is there an absolute standard that we should hold people to before they reproduce or is it always relative? Either we say the bottom 50% of society always shouldn't have kids or its an absolute standard but in this case like 90% of people in heavily underdeveloped countries like Haiti shouldn't reproduce.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 11:44 PM
3

Your comment echoes something I am seeing frequently and reckoning with. Yes, the restricted rights of women and social pressure to get married played a massive role, I should have been more forthcoming about that in my post. My point with the overall framing was to encourage a positive call to action for people in the modern day. Obviously we can't roll back womens rights (and shouldn't), so what do we take from this time period? I still maintain that active social structures are very beneficia…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 11:39 PM
3

Thats a cool story.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 11:36 PM
14

So what lesson do we take from this? My point is that we can't, and shouldn't, take away womens rights. However, there are still positive lessons to be learned from the 60s and 70s regarding the value of social engagement.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 11:33 PM
9

My point was more that the modern guy can't roll back womens rights (nor should we) so the best lesson we can take from the 1960/70s culture is the value of socialization.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 11:25 PM
10

So you believe the issue now is that too many men are just so low quality that no woman would even consider dating them? What should these men do to improve? Would you agree that increased socialization is a good step?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 11:21 PM
8

Do you think socialization plays a role at all? Do you acknowledge that our society being much less socially active would have an effect on dating culture? I can grant that the culture of the time (more prioritizing marriage, more traditional) and the lack of full legal protections for women played a role as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 11:15 PM
9

The stats I posted seem to directly contradict that. Plenty of young people are forming relationships with their friends. I'm not saying that if you ask a friend out they will say yes most of the time, what I am saying is that a large proportion of young people do look for relationships within their social circles. If you have a wider social circle it opens that option.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 11:08 PM
2

It seems most men make the choice to say with their wives as they age. The divorce rate is around 45% and men initiate the divorce only 30% of the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/25 11:23 PM
2

What makes the average woman's life easy?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/25 10:25 PM
2

I don't think it necessarily follows that they view me as beneath them, I don't even know how you would get to that conclusion. I guess its impossible to ever truly know how someone feels about you but there are ways you can make strong determinations. If someone is providing the love and support that I feel is necessary in a relationship I'd have a hard time believing they secretly viewed me as beneath them. Constantly fixating on what your partner might secretly be feeling about you (rather th…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 10:46 PM
1

I would be confused because the goal of a company is to make money. It actually doesn't make sense to pay someone more for less work because it wastes money. Relationships and feelings do not function on a similar logic.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 10:38 PM
1

Communication is important in a relationship. If you aren't getting what you want, ask for it. Again, why should I care about unequal treatment if I am getting everything I want out of the relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 08:45 PM
1

If they met all my needs, yes. Why should I be upset at someone for not giving me something I never asked for?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 08:25 PM
1

If my partner met all my needs in the relationship then I would be happy, yes. If you want them to treat you a certain way then ask for it. If the girl in your hypothetical is fine with ramen and doesn't like fancy dinners then it makes sense that it wouldn't bother her. Just be honest about your needs, I don't see why I should want something just because someone else got it.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 08:17 PM
1

I don't get the obsession with "fairness". People change, maybe they had money with their previous girlfriends and are broke now and can only afford ramen. It doesn't necessarily mean they don't like you as much. The better question is: Are you satisfied with the relationship? Does it meet all your needs? If you are, why leave? If not, why are you staying?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 07:25 PM
2

The goal isn't forcing people to go on dates. What I was getting at was some sort of government-sponsored program that helps people escape total ugliness. That would include plastic surgery, leg lengthening, hormone treatments, etc. The government and the medical industry invests billions in medicine from cancer treatments and dementia cures, so why not in something to help people who are genetically ugly?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/24 01:15 PM
1

You might be educated in something, clearly not data science as all of my arguments went over your head. I'm not gonna bother restating everything as its clear you have no desire to actually pay attention. This is so simple. Some people are attractive enough to be considered attractive by everyone and ugly by no one, some people are so ugly that no one considers them attractive, and MOST people are considered attractive by some people and ugly by some people. I have never contradicted myself onc…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/24 02:23 AM
2

But you got mad at me for telling people not to give up, lol. My exact point was never give up on trying to find happiness in your life. Thats the most you can ask from an individual. Even if society works on the issue of sexless men its not gonna solve itself overnight, a degree of "cope" is necessary. Have faith in Jesus if that helps. I'd say the same thing to someone struggling with an incurable illness. There are a degree of "treatments" that already exist to make someone more attractive, (…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/24 02:09 AM
5

Well according to you and the OP there is NOTHING society can do to make these people attractive. They are doomed from the start due to their genetics. I even went along with your reasoning, I said that even if these people are doomed to be single forever society should still try to spread the message that their life has value, and you still got mad. You can't have it both ways, you can't say society should do more while also saying its totally hopeless. Well no one is forcing you to do anything…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/24 12:45 AM
1

The survey data about partner counts corresponds with STD rates and the researchers utilize filtering techniques to make it more accurate. The GSS data has around a 1:1 ratio between total partner counts for men and women, that would not be possible if everyone was lying, especially if they lied in different ways (women undercounting, men overcounting). I doubt you have any background in statistics or data science, if you want to learn about how self-report data can tested for accuracy here you …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/24 12:34 AM
1

I have never seen someone deny this
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/24 10:28 PM
4

The part of the redpill that is common sense is just a part of pop culture at this point. Everyone knows its good to work out, to be financially successful, to be charming, etc. There are massive industries about helping people achieve these things. The reason I know this is true is that just to stay relevant modern redpill creators (like andrew tate and F&F) have to go overboard with the traditional rhetoric, now saying that you have to be a millionaire to have any chance or that men should aim…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/24 10:27 PM
2

If you acknowledge that some people will just be lonely and unloved forever then isn't the ideal situation trying to find a way to help them accept their situation and NOT be too "messed up" by it? Maybe this is impossible but it seems like we should try to help before giving up on believing that chronically single people can ever be happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/24 10:24 PM
15

I have a hard time believing anyone falls for this anymore. Going to the gym is more popular than ever, social media is dominated with looksmaxxing content, etc. At least for myself and the other zoomers I know, everyone is at least somewhat focused on improving their looks. The idea that "looks don't matter at all just be nice" is totally dead.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/24 10:21 PM
–

What do you mean by "dead on arrival"? Do you mean "no chance of ever having a relationship or sex" or "no chance of having the type of relationship I want"?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/24 10:14 PM
–

What is your evidence for this? Much more than 20% of men are in relationships and are sexually active. So how did you determine that 80% are considered barely human? Are women dating men they don't consider human?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/24 10:13 PM
1

Yes, I totally understand. I have always said there are some people who are too ugly to ever find a partner (at least without directly paying for them to stay). I just don't think its 80% of men or even 20% of men. Its probably less than 1% of men and that is what the data shows when you look at lifetime partner counts and relationship frequency. It is extremely rare to enter your 40s without any sexual or relationship experience. Its not about being more desirable its about hitting the minimum …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 05:44 PM
1

A man can terminate their responsibility to a fetus, but once that fetus is born they assume responsibility. Same as the case where an abortion fails, if the baby is born now both parents have to deal with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 02:17 AM
2

When you remember 25% of people are now raised in single-parent homes it makes a little more sense. Some people might not have an example of a successful marriage in their life and when they go on the internet all they see is redpill stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 02:13 AM
1

Have you ever seen someone you considered ugly in a relationship? My point being that there is no direct looks standard that you can apply to your own case, what you consider ugly might be above the looks threshold for someone else. So yes attractiveness matters a lot and you do have to surpass the looks threshold for that particular woman but theres no telling exactly where that standard is. Don't get me wrong, there are dudes who would get rejected by 99% of women by looks alone and a small % …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 02:04 AM
1

Wow you must have a great life if the only thing disturbing your peace is seeing fictional characters with your skin color and sex do bad things.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 01:59 AM
1

The redpill encourages "spinning plates" nowhere in redpill ideology does it say you should be monogamous.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/24 04:00 PM
1

Mike Pence also calls his wife "mother". I think people were generally weirded out by his objectively strange relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/24 03:55 PM
1

Lol what was OP expecting? Was he really expecting women to get mad at the idea some random dude doesn't want to talk to them? The desire for attention is not equal. On posts about 4B and giving up on men you always see men crying in the comments or trying to insult the women. The 4B stuff frequently goes viral because BOTH men and women react to it. But does MGTOW stuff ever really go viral? No, because women just don't care.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/24 03:54 PM
1

My point is that 80% of women are not only paying attention to 20% of men. 80% of men are not "invisible". You claim "average" men get no attention but only 30% of men aged 18-24 had no sex in the last year and that drops to around 18% for men aged 25-35 and around 10% for men aged 35-44.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 04:44 AM
1

Ok so you admit most of the attention goes to unattractive men. Therefore, 80% of women can't only be paying attention to the top 20% of men. Also the average guy has consistent sexual activity (around 50% of men report having sex weekly or more) I guess someone who finds them attractive. https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle/2767066
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 04:18 AM
2

consistent and well-explained thanks for responding
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 01:53 AM
0

Where do you derive morality from?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 01:35 AM
0

You cannot sacrifice your child for your bodily autonomy. Once the fetus becomes a conscious person both parents have a duty to protect and support it. But it is immoral to abandon a child (concieved during consensual sex) to preserve your own autonomy, whether you are a woman or a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 01:27 AM
2

That quote literally comes from the same blog and dataset that the 80/20 attractiveness graphs come from. So all I am doing is quoting THE EXACT SAME BLOG that you used as evidence earlier. Do you not trust it now?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 12:39 AM
1

The blogs that OkCupid used to put out, which is where everyone got that attractiveness graph showing women rate 80% of men as unattractive. https://thesocietypages.org/socimages/2009/12/03/guest-post-in-the-land-of-the-hideous-the-somewhat-less-than-loathsome-man-is-king/ This is a good overview of other data from the same blog on how actual message rates correlate to rated attactiveness. According to OKCupid, “women rate an incredible 80% of guys as worse-looking than medium. Very harsh. On th…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 10:02 PM
1

How is pointing out racial preferences in dating weird? They have been proven to exist for women and men. You seem to think I am describing my own behavior, but I'm not. Basically all of my romantic/sexual partners are nonwhite, mostly because I don't have any preference and they were the people who showed me attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 04:39 PM
2

Yeah and if you read the study women still messaged men they considered less attractive, the messaging distribution was not 80/20. So this is a perfect example of the 80/20 rule not actually playing out in terms of real outcomes.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 12:18 PM
-1

most people consider latinas to be white
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 12:16 PM
2

My mistake, I meant likes, not matches.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 05:43 AM
5

I agree with a lot of what you said. Its definitely true that increasing education and salary for women causes them to chase a smaller % of men who outearn them. However, men still largely outearn women for the most part. According to 2022 data, young men make up 44% of college students. So the market is definitely getting more difficult, but I haven't seen any evidence that women are only chasing 1% of men and 80% are ignored. Partner count data consistently shows that women and men sleep aroun…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 03:57 AM
3

and be young but yeah. Also consider that basically EVERY guy wants an in-shape, mentally well, white/asian girl who is between 18-28 and doesn't have kids. Most women who meet those criteria go off the dating market fast so its a large pool of guys fighting for a shrinking pool of attractive women.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 03:44 AM
1

Think about it this way, trans men are kinda considered "men" in the eyes of the law and they can get abortions. Its not illegal for men to get abortions, men just don't ever get them because... they don't have wombs.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 03:41 AM
1

Good post, I have long said that the easiest way to find success in dating is to lower your standards. I had pretty low standards for looks but that made it easier to find someone who clicked with me personality-wise AND there was an attractiveness differential (she found me more attractive than I found her) which led to a good relationship while it lasted. No drama, constant physical affection, basically everything I see men online say they want. The one thing I'd critique the post about is tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 03:38 AM
4

Pregnancy isn't equal. Men don't have to carry the fetus in their bodies for 9 months and endure lifelong hormonal and physical changes as a result. The result of this difference is that women should have the option to end the pregnancy before the fetus becomes a conscious being. In this period the choice is purely about allowing the person carrying the fetus control over their body. It is not a conscious being yet so it does not deserve moral consideration. You cannot expect people to be treate…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/24 03:36 AM
4

Until the child is born, yes. When the child is born whoever is on the birth certificate assumes legal responsibility. If the father discusses beforehand they could make an agreement to keep him off the birth certificate.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/24 03:25 AM
9

Yes this is actually how the law works. You cannot claim child support before the child is born. The father can ghost the mother, with no legal repercussions, until the child is born.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/24 04:30 PM
1

Maybe for normal mode its women and men born into fairly families who are also at least kinda attractive. And then easy mode would be women and men born into super wealthy family and very hot. My main point is that average women aren't living easy lives, which it seems we agree on.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 06:29 AM
1

I think its important because that is literally what the OP question is about. They are a woman who felt frustrated because men online were saying all women automatically have easy lives. However, I can understand that you have been coming at this from a different perspective.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 06:23 AM
1

Cool so we agree women are not living life on "easy" difficulty. I guess a better analogy is that women generally live life on "hard" and men live life on "nightmare" difficulty.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 06:09 AM
2

Not my question. I agree that women have generally easier lives than men. My point is that while their lives are easier, they are still not actually "easy". Basically everyone goes through tons of pain and bullshit. If we were to isolate the people actually living "easy" lives, it wouldn't be women, it would likely be super rich and hot people, men and women. Do you agree?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 06:03 AM
2

Do you think most women live "easy" lives?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 06:00 AM
1

Sorry you are at risk of homelessness. My point is that no homeless person, whether they are in a shelter or not, is living an easy life.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 05:52 AM
3

yeah, my point isn't that its not sexist, its that those results can't be generalized to make a statement about all fields.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 05:48 AM
–

Thats not the point of the OP. Its not about if women have advantages, its about whether women live easy lives or not. Do these advantages lead to an easy life for most women? Because so far you have not proven that.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 03:08 AM
–

The vast majority of women will never have this opportunity or would have to accept a low quality lifestyle (relative to modern expectations) to make it work. Also keep in mind this makes the woman completely financially dependent on the man which is a very scary position.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 03:05 AM
–

- Not true, women are valued because they can have kids which is very physically demanding and then changes their entire life forever. It is such a valued trait because it is so important and life-changing. - Only hot women. Your average women (who is very overweight, mind you) isn't getting sugar baby treatment - Maybe if you gave examples I would agree - No, women get love because they are giving something to a guy or the guy expects something in return and is delusional. No guy just gives lov…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 03:03 AM
–

Yeah but does that mean women have an easy life? Think about it this way, around 0.1% of people will use a homeless shelter during their life. So this safety net never even comes into play for 99.9% of women, and if it does they are still homeless and broke. So how does this make women's lives easy?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 02:51 AM
–

I love the phrase: "Everything in life is about sex except sex which is about power." I think that sums up life for most men pretty well.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 02:47 AM
–

A safety net for being homeless sure is meaningful but definitely not indicative of an easy life. Would you say homeless women live life on easy mode because they have access to a shelter? Really? Is it really a safety net if you are still homeless and totally broke? I am honestly baffled that the homeless shelter thing is so consistently mentioned, like homeless women have to check their privilege that they aren't dying in the street. Yeah, we should give more resources to homeless men but its …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 02:45 AM
–

Yes
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 02:36 AM
–

Thats why I said womens lives are GENERALLY easier, because there are exceptions.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 01:51 AM
2

yeah thats why these women are single
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 01:19 AM
18

Most of the women in that twitter thread "commiserating on how common it is to go without boyfriends" mention that they constantly get approached by men and turn them all down. So its not like these women are being ignored, they just don't like what is being offered. Ironically, it is gen z women who are actually saying "the juice is not worth the squeeze".
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 01:18 AM
–

Your paper is about testing gender preferences of college faculty for an assistant professor in a STEM field. So its possible they preferred the female applicants because women are underrepresented as STEM professors. Additionally, the study looked at the preferences of college faculty, not actual hiring managers. For these reasons it cannot be used as evidence for systemic hiring bias in all fields.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 01:15 AM
–

Generally easier than men's lives but still not easy. Lifting 800 pounds is easier than lifting 1000 pounds but I wouldn't say doing either is easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 12:33 AM
–

What is your evidence for this? The research I have seen is very mixed, and nothing with differences as high as 99%.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 12:29 AM
–

I don't believe womens lives are easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 12:26 AM
7

Whatever it takes to keep you going. There are two options in this world: Keep trying (consistent self-improvement and dating when you feel ready) Give up Mark my words, if you are an early-mid 20s guy and you give up, you WILL regret it later. I'm not talking about taking some time to level yourself up, I'm talking about totally losing faith in your ability to have a happy life and not putting in any effort to improve it. You will regret it when you hit your 30s and so badly want that time back…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 09:20 PM
1

How did it get better? Did you find someone or change your mindset?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 09:15 PM
–

I don't think anyone really lives life on "easy mode" except for the sons and daughters of the very rich. Even then wealthy people have higher reported rates of mental illness so its not like their lives are perfect. Generally when men online talk about women's lives being easy they are doing one of a few things: Only thinking about hot women or hot sex workers. Yes, we all get it, super hot women can make money from sex work or sugar baby stuff. The craziest feminists would agree with you on th…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 09:12 PM
2

Maybe you could say its easier to become a plumber but even with a less inviting job market the gender studies grads eventually find jobs within similar salary ranges. All this being said, both groups make around 60k so we aren't talking big money here.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 08:56 PM
13

Maybe they have some shared hobbies or just get alone well. Also mutual hornyness helps a lot. But I knew plenty of guys in engineering or other "high iq" majors who had normal hobbies in addition to anime. You are fixated on two stereotypes, the hyper-autistic engineering major who is only interested in video games and anime, and the airhead girl studying something worthless. Lots of engineering/CS majors aren't like that and there are plenty of high-iq, nerdy women in college too.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 07:12 PM
11

Your average gender studies graduate makes the same salary as your average plumber. So "useless degrees" may not be be as bad as you think.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 07:07 PM
1

I have never seen any evidence that women have significantly more sexual partners than men on average, where are you getting that info from?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/24 06:58 PM
1

I said I saw his point as in understood it. That doesn't mean I think it is justified. I don't think targeting innocents with violence is ever justified as a means of addressing oppression.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/24 08:33 PM
2

No matter what X is?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/24 03:33 AM
1

Out of curiosity, if you did not have any romantic success but you knew IF you became a serial killer you would find love would you do it?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/24 02:45 AM
4

You are assuming that it is the responsibility of society to control who ends up with romantic partners. Yes society can set overall standards but aside from total control there is no way to ensure that moral behavior will lead to romantic success. You will never be satisfied unless society exerts total control over romantic partnerships, which would mean that women are obligated and forced to date men who act a certain way. That seems to contradict your earlier statement that no individual shou…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/24 02:29 AM
1

Lol no it doesn't justify it, unless might literally makes right in your worldview. I don't think the physical ramifications are likely to occur in a wide scale. The pacification of incels is so widespread that its literally being studied by psychologists. Excerpt: "Contrary to common beliefs, empirical evidence suggests that incels are not particularly prone to violence. Incels’ propensity for violence appears relatively low compared to that of the general population. We conclude by offering on…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/24 02:05 AM
5

Have you considered that if this situation does indeed occur then maybe you are just not personally capable of finding a romantic partner? Maybe you did have a chance and you just messed it up. Is that worth hurting random people?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/24 02:01 AM
4

Why hurt others then? Just to feel good?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/24 01:53 AM
1

The point is not about if single men are gonna be violent, the question is whether or not their violence is morally justified.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/24 01:46 AM
3

So you admit that chronically single men who commit violence against random individuals are not morally justified? Why do it then? Just to feel good?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/24 01:44 AM
7

How do you decide what is a fair dating environment? I am sure you understand that there is never going to be a world where every man who wants a family gets one, there is always going to be some sort of dating/screening process. I see your point in that if the process is excessively unfair then men are justified in lashing out at society, but how do you decide if that is the case? Is it on an individual basis? Because if its on a societal basis how does someone determine if they are being held …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/24 12:10 AM
–

This is actually the theme of the Barbie movie. Its what the whole "I am Kenough" meme is about.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 09:18 PM
1

Your average plumber makes as much as your average gender studies degree holder. For context.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 09:17 PM
–

Software engineering is still in-demand and lucrative.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 09:16 PM
1

When did I say your version of the redpill is wrong? I would probably agree with a lot of the advice you give. But so would most people. So would most, liberal, "bluepill" people. Given your definition, women would be happy that their partner is "redpilled".
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 09:13 PM
2

What data? There is lots of data
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 09:08 PM
2

You are describing the industry of "self-help", which is a collection of knowledge about how to be successful. You can call that the red pill but people will be confused.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 09:07 PM
2

What is the red pill?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 09:04 PM
1

The "redpill" is a specific ideology defined by Rollo Tomasi, Rian Stone, and other writers/bloggers. It is basically a set of evolutionary biology theories about how women mate. For example: a redpill belief is that women change their mating preferences based on where they are in their ovulatory cycle. Nowadays the idea of "being redpilled" has lost all meaning due to overuse. Everyone wants to feel special, to feel like they have some sort of secret knowledge that differentiates them from soci…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 09:03 PM
–

I never dismissed redpill ideas. My point is that when someone makes fun of Andrew Tate, they are mostly making fun of his super controversial and wacky takes (take away women voting, etc), his literal scams, or sex trafficking allegations. The self-help stuff is a small part of Andrew Tates online identity.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 08:55 PM
2

Being clean cut, successful, and fit doesn't make you "redpilled". Being "redpilled" is a specific view on the behavior of women. According to redpill guys Tom Brady was bluepilled, so are tons of other successful men. Its not about success or looks, its about ideology.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 08:25 PM
3

Why does the redpill claim every successful man? Do you realize the redpill is a specific set of beliefs about women? Its basically a specific view of evolutionary psychology. You do not have to have redpill beliefs about women to be a successful guy. Most of the "chads" I knew were just attractive, successful, fun guys. They were all liberal-leaning and would have thought Andrew Tate was dumb. Being "redpill" has very little to do with being successful.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 08:20 PM
–

This has very little to do with Andrew Tate. The basic self help "get jacked and be confident" bit of Tate is a small part of his identity. Tate is mostly 2 things. A controversy generator due to his statements about women (treat them like children, they shouldn't vote), white supremacy, etc Funneling young men to his literal scams (real world, crypto coins, etc) The court documents showed he was making 600k A MONTH off of his online university scams. I don't know what basic self-help advice has…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/24 08:13 PM
1

The delay of marriage means people are less interested in forming serious relationships when they are young. When marrying young was more common people seriously dated prior to 18. Now that most people don't consider marriage until their mid-late 20s it doesn't make sense to start dating that early. And yes, gen z is the most educated generation ever, especially for women. It is expected that everyone becomes economically stable independently. It is no longer the expectation that you create econ…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/24 03:35 PM
1

We both want the same things, we want a culture that allows for people to feel comfortable forming committed relationships early on in life. I just don't think the problems center on height and looks. Standards for those have rose but they aren't significant factors in dating. For example, there is literally no significant difference in average height between single men and men in relationships. Sure its gonna be hard for a 5'2 guy to find a date but remember that less than 1% of men are 5'2. Th…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/24 04:12 AM
1

Florida still has no-fault divorce, the changes made it so that custody defaults to 50/50 and that its harder to secure permanent alimony. My point was that if its women choosing not to date, how is making marriage more attractive to MEN going to help? Again, if women don't want to date or marry men how would this help them? It seems most of the issues revolve around making marriage and men more attractive to women (especially early on). I don't think any of your solutions address that.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/24 04:02 AM
1

Incel doesn't mean "has infrequent sex", incel generally means a guy who just never has sex (or maybe has sex once every few years). We can disagree about the meaning of incel though. You can say "excessively high standards" but really its "financial and emotional stability". People aren't getting married young and building together anymore, nowadays you establish yourself THEN start dating. And women are generally doing this, they are going to college at higher rates than men and are out-earnin…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/24 03:05 AM
1

Republicans aren't gonna change that and even if they did according to you gen z isn't forming relationships anyways so why would they get married at all. Also if gen z women are picky now imagine how picky they would get if they knew they couldn't divorce their husband. Same with this This might change but I don't know how better parenting rights would help chronically single men Trump denounced project 2025 and said he does not support it Dunno what this has to do with Republicans helping men …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/24 02:15 AM
1

I already acknowledged that because people are delaying marriage (for many reasons) there is an extended period of singledom for gen z. Thats different from saying 30% of men are incels though, which just isn't true. Most gen z guys are sexually active, but its rare people actually settle down before their late 20s/ early 30s. Also, saying "guys getting rejected by gay women in bars is dystopian" makes you look like a goof.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/24 01:54 AM
2

What are Republicans gonna do for single men? How will they help the situation?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/24 01:42 AM
1

Keep in mind the 18-29 range is skewed by the men aged 18-25 who are normally single at higher rates than men in their 30s. I agree that people are not forming relationships to the extent they used to, you can see that in marriage rates and birth rates, the question is what is the reason and how drastic is it. I think a big factor has to do with people delaying marriage to focus on education and career. Additionally, marriage is not as socially encouraged and is more seen as an aspect of persona…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 10:11 PM
1

You got that 27% number from a GSS survey in 2018 which found 27% of men aged 18-30 didn't have sex in the last year. However, the 2022 data shows that for men aged 18-35 only 15% had 0 sexual partners in the last year. As for virginity age has a strong effect. For men 18-20, about 65% are virgins. However, once you hit age 20+ only 10% of men are virgins. At age 22+ only 6% of men are virgins. So really its just that lots of men are losing their virginity in their early 20s rather than late tee…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 09:50 PM
1

Men aged 18-24 are all gen Z Gen z ranges from 15 - 27 So I'd say looking at men aged 18-24 is a good representation of gen z dating success.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 09:40 PM
1

Only 14% of men 18-24 had 0 sex partners in 2022. But yeah, given that we are delaying marriage as a society that leaves more chances for people to have extended periods of singledom. I do agree there is more single people, but being a complete virgin into your mid-late 20s is still very rare. Data from 2017-2019 shows less than 1% of men were virgins past 30. It can't have changed that drastically in 5 years. https://datepsychology.com/are-27-of-young-men-really-virgins-and-why/
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 01:35 PM
3

Deserved how? So if I am an incel then I deserve to enact violence on random people? Dunnp how that can be justified morally.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 01:28 PM
11

https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/08/20/a-profile-of-single-americans/ Here ya go
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 01:24 PM
12

Its normal to deal with rejection in dating, maybe a top 0.1% chad won't but whats even the point of mentioning that. That study comparing attractive to average men used young adults as the sample. Also when you look at men aged 18-24 only 14% had 0 sexual partners in 2022. Around 80% of men had between 1-3 sexual partners in that year. The distributions were similar for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 03:27 AM
15

The average man has been in multiple relationships and has sex multiple times a year. The average guy on tinder also gets around a new match every day and 60% of men report a positive experience on dating apps. For what its worth, I agree a top % of men do get more attention, I just don't think that actually translates into an insane discrepancy in dating or sexual activity. When you compare the partner counts of average men to attractive men, attractive men have more partners but not significan…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 02:50 AM
5

He is talking about an incel uprising, repeating the "women only date chad so all the scorned incels will eventually take their revenge" narrative.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 01:59 AM
24

What is your evidence for the idea that women only gravitate towards a very small % of men? More than a small % of men are sexually active and in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 01:57 AM
19

Well 70% of men are in relationships so I guess entitlement is not that out of control yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 01:56 AM
1

I meant in the context of dating/sexual relationships. I have yet to see any concrete data showing 20% of men have 80% of the sexual activity and relationship experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 09:24 PM
3

I told him that and now hes crying... Brutal, real thick tears too
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 03:55 AM
4

I just ran into an 80 year old man who said all women are queens and he has never seen a woman chase chad ever. Guess I have to listen to him now.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 03:42 AM
1

First off, none of this has to do with the "blue pill". I don't agree with all of the blue pill, thats why I don't have the flair. This is about the red pill being wrong when it says women say one thing and do the opposite. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23915041/ Experiment: "We conducted experiments using online messaging and modified speed-dating platforms. Results indicate that when a mating pool includes people at the low end of social status and physical attractiveness, mate choice criter…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 03:40 AM
6

ha you are old
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 03:22 AM
9

Where are you getting those numbers from?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 03:19 AM
–

Both things can be true. Attractiveness can be correlated with casual sexual success (which is what your source says) and there can be no significant overall correlation between attractiveness and body count. This is because casual sex is not as common as people think. Around 80% of all sexual activity occurs with long-term partners and within relationships. So while attractive people may have more casual sex partners on average, because generally people have sex within relationships (even attra…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 03:48 AM
1

Assuming 70% of men are in relationships, 10% of men are attractive, and all attractive men are in relationships. That means 10% of men are attractive and in relationships, meaning 60% of men are unattractive and in relationships. 60/70 = 85% of all men in relationships are unattractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 03:34 AM
–

I think the guy does good work, if you read it you might learn something. Anyways, have a good night.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 02:23 AM
–

Never said anything about "romantic interest", I am talking about number of sexual partners. So share some of your "mountain of evidence" proving the claim that attractive men have significantly more sexual partners than average men.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 02:09 AM
–

How do you know its untrue? Is it from the youtube videos you watched? Or... let me guess... personal anecdotes?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 01:55 AM
–

All of the studies are performed by actual academics, what the twitter guy does is compile them. Actually go to the links and you can see the real studies being cited. Believe it or not, redpill ideas like "80% of women only date 20% of men" or "women only find 10% of men attractive" are so stupid that actual academics don't even bother to directly address them. Its on weird internet people like that guy to compile the actual research and address those claims directly because again, those claims…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 01:52 AM
–

Wow how convenient... And how convenient that behavioral data from experimental settings and demographic data (marriage rates, STD rates) ALSO rebukes TRP. I guess every single form of evidence (other than your personal anecdotes) disproves TRP. You guys really are victims, huh....
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 01:15 AM
–

One of the studies I linked shows that the stated/revealed preference theory is fake, generally women actually prefer what they state they want. Women state they want kind and dependable guys and actually prefer those guys for relationships. In addition, you can predict breakup frequency using stated preferences. If stated preferences had no effect on genuine interest then that would not be possible. The fact that body count correlates moderately highly (0.6) between partners shows that women te…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 01:10 AM
–

I don't know what "higher sexuality rates" means. Do you mean the studies that show criminals have more kids? Thats because criminals are more likely to engage in reckless and antisocial behavior, like having sex without birth control and having kids while knowing you can't support them. Men making less than 20k a year have more kids than men who make 100k, so does that mean women would prefer a poorer man over a richer man? No, it just means poorer people make riskier decisions and aren't as ca…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 11:37 PM
–

Prove 99% of women would date a hot rapist.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 11:09 PM
–

Do you think a modern woman is more likely to want to date a criminal than a non-criminal?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 11:08 PM
–

Some of the evidence is self report some are experiments some are demographic data. None of it supports TRP. How do you know what women are "truly attracted to"? What kind of evidence do you use?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 10:47 PM
–

The redpill is wrong about that though: Claim: Women generally have way more sex than the average man, most women consistently have casual sex with chads while the average guy barely ever gets laid https://datepsychology.com/how-many-sexual-partners-did-men-and-women-have-in-2022/ https://datepsychology.com/casual-sex-is-often-mismeasured-and-overestimated/ Distribution of male/female sex partners is similar and STD data corroborates this. The top 5-10% of men and women have lots of sex with eac…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 07:23 PM
–

TRP isn't supported by statistics, redpill guys even say statistics are fake except for that one OkCupid study they misinterpret. Statistics of dating behavior disprove TRP: Claim: Attractive men get laid more https://datepsychology.com/male-attractiveness-and-sexual-partner-count/ There is a low correlation between physical attractiveness and partner count The traits which correlate most highly with partner count are extraversion and sociosexuality (how much you want sex and your openness to se…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 07:20 PM
1

How do you know all of these women are dating men they aren't actually attracted to? Even if we assume every single one of the 10% attractive men are in relationships that still means 85% of relationships involve an unattractive man (you can check my math on that if you want).
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 07:16 PM
–

How are 70% of men in relationships when only 10% are considered attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 08:39 PM
–

You still haven't explained what "crowd sourced data" is and what the findings are.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 04:03 AM
–

"stop trying to use actual statistics and just trust me bro" What does dating app history have to do with this? If you want to make a claim you have to prove it. I agree that women get more matches than men but you need to show what effect that has. What studies show: - There is no annual difference in partner counts for men and women who use dating apps - Grøntvedt et al. (2020) found that only 20% of Tinder users reported ever having casual sex and that, even when matches were plentiful, very …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 01:34 AM
–

Link the "crowd sourced data" whatever that means. Everyone agrees attractive people get more attention from the opposite sex, it just doesn't translate into massive differences in partner counts. If 80/20 doesn't measure partner counts or relationship frequency then what is it measuring? What is "attention" in this case? Physical attractiveness isn't a good predictor of partner count, alcohol use is a better predictor (r = 0.2 vs r = 0.4). Most studies show little to no difference in partner co…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 12:29 AM
3

Stated preferences have shown to highly correlate to actual behavior. For example, you can use stated preferences to accurately predict the chance couples break up. https://x.com/datepsych/status/1834755496039137329
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 12:07 AM
–

And? They are screaming into the void just like any other person who tries to debate others into dating them. "Well actually, if you look at this chart I actually rank top 10% in height and income so you MUST find me attractive or else you don't follow the science"
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 11:59 PM
–

The 80/20 thing is fake. No actual study of behavior has shown any 80/20 distribution in dating or hookups. Even the Okcupid study that the attractiveness data came from showed more than 20% of men received messages.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 11:54 PM
–

Be honest, what is the support to make life better for young women? What does that look like?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 02:43 PM
–

What do we do about it? Do affirmative action for men? Well the supreme court said thats unconstitutional. Be nicer to men? I agree with this but what does this look like in practice? Banning social media comments that are mean to men? Censoring articles which are seen as anti-male? I think we need an empowering, positive-masculinity movement that offers career internships and programs for men as well as running sports and hobby groups. The group would have chapters at high schools and colleges …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 02:41 PM
-2

wow so edgy, are you the joker? Are you actually joker from the movie joker?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 11:46 PM
1

Success is when luck meets preparation. There is an element of luck to every situation, but its on you to be prepared for when those situations arise and to try and make those situations more likely. If you try to date, you will inevitably meet people interested in dating, the next step is being prepared so you come across as attractive. Its not that good luck = partner its more like really, really bad luck = no chance at partner. As long as your luck isn't awful you should have some opportuniti…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 06:21 PM
-2

You are describing twitter troll fights. No left-wing in real life would tell a lonely man hes an awful person and deserves to be alone. Also, as a redpill guy, wouldn't you agree a lonely guy should try to be more attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 06:15 PM
-1

Whats the alternative? You can't force attraction. If you want help becoming more attractive all the resources are out there, you don't need to figure it out on your own.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 06:12 PM
1

I acted redpill-ish in my first LTR and ended up getting dumped because she felt I wasn't emotionally invested enough and didn't show emotional vulnerability (her words exactly). So its not the key to success every time.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 12:30 AM
1

So the redpill is just basic self-help? Its just about getting richer, more confident, and more jacked? You are leaving out all the female psychology stuff and evobio bullshit. The stuff about how women will never love men and are always looking to leave you. The stuff about how if you ever show emotion around a woman she will instantly stop loving you. Thats the downside of the red pill. The self-help stuff is great but the psychology aspects turn you into an extremely insecure wreck incapable …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/24 06:35 PM
6

I agree, the distinction is that indicators of desirability can only be compared within-gender not between. So a man needs to figure out where he ranks among men (as rated by women), then date a woman who has a similar rank among women (as rated by men). Example: Dave gets more compliments and tinder matches than 60% of other men, his match is lily who gets more compliments/head turns and tinder matches than 60% of other women. But if you compared lily and dave directly she would get WAY more co…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/24 06:29 PM
6

I agree with this except that men and women show desire in different ways. Men are much more inclined to be sexually aggressive, catcalling, approaching etc. Basically every single woman ever has been approached like this since she turned 14. I'd say less than 5% of men have ever been approached by women or received aggressive sexual attention (catcalling etc). Its just a difference in how the sexes show attraction. But by your logic only 5% of men are desirable enough to date any woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/24 06:20 PM
1

If you don't put in effort as a woman then you don't deserve men and are no better than male incels But if you put in effort as a woman that makes you a degenerate whore Redpillers love double standards
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 03:38 PM
2

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: If you want to revamp your dating profile and add better photos DELETE your account fully and start fresh. Adding new photos won't change your current position in the algorithm which is likely fucked if you have spent a while with bad photos. And when you see people saying "I added new photos and it didn't change anything" keep that in mind, they likely didn't make a new account and are still positioned as if they have the terrible photos.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 03:34 PM
1

There is no moralizing from me or Lillith, its all about outcomes. Lillith is saying if men get no matches they need to try and improve their profiles if they want success. The quality of womens profiles is irrelevant because most get a bunch of matches. However, if women did complain the answer would be the same as for men, they should improve.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 03:31 PM
1

You need to make a new account. Even if you put in new photos you keep your place in the algorithm. If you do a massive revamp you need to start over.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 03:29 PM
2

yeah but women are getting hundreds of matches a day
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 03:18 PM
1

As I said before, I disagree that male victims of rape should have to pay child support or have parental responsibility. But if someone shows up randomly with your child, thats on you. Don't have unprotected sex with people you don't know. You made a child, deal with it. Its not a good scenario and ideally you should know about the child ASAP but it is still something you have to accept accountability for. I would support some restriction on back child support, I don't think you should have to p…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 02:42 AM
1

I agree on the sentencing stuff, the courts are biased and that is wrong. My point is just how sometimes what seems like bias could be actually due to underlying factors. However, generally courts are biased against men regardless of the facts of the case and that is wrong. Once the fetus becomes a person it is the responsibility of both the parents. Either both parents take care of it or one is the caregiver and the other decides not to participate. In that case if the caregiver wants they can …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 12:42 AM
1

"Just because men are stronger does not mean they automatically deserve a jail sentence 60% longer than women, for example, and yet that is exactly what is happening." I agree there is legal bias against men but I would not justify that around biological inequality because there is no logical basis there to support it. There is no reason why stronger people should get longer sentences for the same crime. The confounding variable is that stronger people might be more likely to commit more violent…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 10:31 PM
2

If a woman raped a man and he can prove it then he should be able to remove himself from any parental rights. I'd even support forcing rapist women to get abortions (prior to 24 weeks). They showed no respect for the sexual autonomy of others so they lose the right to their own autonomy in this circumstance. Whoever is carrying the fetus can get an abortion prior to 24 weeks. Prior to 24 weeks the fetus is a non-conscious biological entity which does not require moral consideration. If the perso…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 09:40 PM
1

Well you have to justify the law. Why should only people with penises vote? Then I can decide if your reasoning is moral or good.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 08:56 PM
6

If a man can get pregnant then he will be protected under abortion law. The law only discriminates by who is pregnant, which makes sense because abortion is a choice for the person actually carrying the fetus.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 01:32 PM
1

Well men don't have to pay child support until the baby is born so they kinda can. The state won't force a man to support his pregnant wife.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 01:28 PM
1

Why consider something a child if it has not developed any necessary features for moral consideration, namely consciousness? Up until that point its basically brain-dead.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 01:27 PM
10

Theres a very simple solution to this: Only commit to people who meet all your needs. If having frequent and enthusiastic sex is something you need in a relationship then don't date someone unless you are getting it. This way how they treated their past partners doesn't matter because regardless you are getting everything you need.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 10:26 PM
1

Your "men are lying about having sex" argument goes out the window because the reported rate of virginity for women is around the same as it is for men at every age. For your hypothesis to be true both men and women would have to be lying and in such a way that the overall numbers are within a few percentage points, which is not likely. And your second argument is basically "I see unsuccessful men on reddit so that must be the norm". The posts on reddit are subject to extreme selection bias and …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 05:31 PM
1

Nope, from 2017-2019 https://datepsychology.com/are-27-of-young-men-really-virgins-and-why/
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 04:24 PM
1

Ok maybe its 14% now, not really a meaningful difference. The 38% stat is not surprising considering 50% of men are virgins at 18. Virginity is heavily weighted towards your late teens - early 20s, but the vast majority (85%) lose it by 24.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 12:38 PM
3

The statistic you are referencing is that in 2019 around 27% of men reported 0 sexual partners in the last year. This does not contradict the idea that 10% of men are virgins at 24. As far as I know no study has ever been released showing 1/3 of all men are virgins.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 05:26 AM
1

whats the number now?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 12:22 AM
2

Being a virgin generally does not make women more desirable. "Stewart-Williams et al. (2016) found that neither men nor women reported a virgin as the ideal partner. To paraphrase the title of this paper, people wanted a partner with a bit of a sexual past, but not too much. Both for short and long term relationships, the ideal past partner count was modest for men and women." https://datepsychology.com/body-count-and-sexual-double-standards/
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/24 10:30 PM
13

Don't worry, you are in good company here. Pretty sure the last subreddit survey revealed around 35% of men who post here are virgins despite 70% being 25 or older.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/24 09:02 PM
0

No it means the average person sees sexual experience at this age as normal, because it is. Virgin women are not shamed, but it generally does not make them more desirable.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/24 08:54 PM
9

If you are a very attractive woman its almost impossible to not be desired. Its like the meme with the "I like nerds" but its just gigachad with glasses, the same goes for hot women. If you are very attractive than most of your traits will be perceived as positive, or people just won't care.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/24 08:49 PM
8

Yep, the average person sees a degree of sexual experience in your early 20s as normal and healthy. They are as if not more likely to see a older virgin woman as a red flag than a green flag (for all the reasons you mentioned).
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/24 08:47 PM
6

Only 10% of men are virgins at 24 so your perspective is in the minority. Not a bad thing, just adding the context because the OP asked about the "typical" perspective.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/24 07:34 PM
6

For non-religious women dating in non-religious environments virginity does not matter. Other factors, like attractiveness and lifestyle compatibility, matter a lot more. Everyone is expected to have some sort of romantic or sexual experience by the end of their early 20s so not being a virgin is normal. Also virginity in a young adult woman can be a sign they are sheltered, shy, or are very picky. Its not always seen as a green flag like people make it out to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/24 07:32 PM
1

https://www.liebertpub.com/doi/full/10.1089/ict.2023.29074.jha https://ifstudies.org/blog/who-is-happiest-married-mothers-and-fathers-per-the-latest-general-social-survey https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2352250X16300252
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/24 05:03 PM
2

Most major sociological studies have found romantic relationships and creating a family are the most consistent ways to achieve happiness and fulfillment. They also have positive correlations with health and income. Being in relationships does generally make your life better, its not something that the majority of the population can just forget about.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 06:23 PM
1

That is 6 per 10 million who meet the standards to even get a date in the first place. Thats not counting any idea of chemistry or romantic compatibility which will also come into play once they start going on dates. So yeah, individually there aren't many people who someone will really click with but that is why your general vetting criteria shouldn't be super strict. Unless you don't really care about being single and being in a relationship is not important. If thats the case then be as stric…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 06:02 PM
3

Suburban kids have the highest rates of mental illness. Being rich isn't the magical key to raising kids well. Also your reasoning doesn't match your standards. You said the guy needs to be able to financially support a wife and kids himself, thats far beyond just avoiding poverty.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 05:38 PM
4

Just saying depending on what your standards for resources, height, and attractiveness are you are likely only describing 0.031% of men. And the vast majority of those guys are already in relationships. So if a woman has those standards around 0.0000062% of men or 6 men per 10 million are viable partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 05:35 PM
0

Would the world be a better place if all people decided to stop reproducing?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 05:30 PM
1

Yep, I established that. The overall number of successful old men is larger but the % chance of succeeding as an old guy is lower.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 12:59 AM
2

Women tend to date up in age and men tend to date down. Its generally only by 2-4 years but its enough to make dating more difficult as a younger guy. Emotional maturity, financial stability, some sort of skillset in a hobby, good fashion/grooming. All of that stuff is necessary if you want to be successful in dating as a guy. Some dudes get it when they are younger and some guys need to build it up over time. That combined with women dating up in age means that age is more of a factor for men. …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 12:56 AM
1

You are right, young people are more likely to be single for both men and women. Age is more of a factor for men though.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/24 10:56 PM
1

I don't know if that is true, generally past 35 a similar amount of men and women are single. Maybe the difference is that single women are less likely to be actively dating than single men.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/24 10:44 PM
0

I don't think there is a fixed percent of young women willing to participate in age-gap dating. If there are a lot more old men its natural that more will succeed in dating young women. However, the success rate will be much lower overall.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/24 10:08 PM
1

The number of old women is irrelevant here unless you want to say a substantial number of young men are going to start dating old women.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/24 10:06 PM
2

Good post but you are missing one angle. Depending on how bad the distribution gets, you might see more age gap relationships than currently. This is because there are so many older men that naturally more young women end up dating them. However, it could still be harder to date down in age than currently. There are more men dating down than before but because the relative proportion of older men is so skewed its harder to do so. Think about it this way: Currently lets say the ratio of young wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/24 05:27 PM
7

You are interpreting this incorrectly. There will always be the same amount of young men as young women. Every young woman will have a young guy to date if she chooses so (and most do). The difference is now there are much more older men. So older men have to compete with the other older men for a relatively smaller pool of younger women. However, the pool of young men is NOT relatively smaller. The ratio of young men to young women has stayed the same while the ratio of young women to old men h…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/24 05:20 PM
1

The 40% also comes from a survey study. Actually the 40% and the 70% come from the same study. https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/08/20/a-profile-of-single-americans/ 40% of young men are in relationships but 70% of all men are in relationships. Where do you get your numbers from?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 03:23 AM
1

So you think only 1% of men are in relationships? Even the stat for young men has ~40% in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/24 05:12 PM
2

You didn't give any evidence, you just repeated that its a fact. What is your evidence for the idea that a majority of women only date hot guys who treat them badly?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/24 04:52 PM
3

What facts? Do you have any evidence that the majority of women only chase hot guys who treat them badly?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/24 04:18 PM
1

Well 70% of men are in relationships so I guess that perspective is not that common
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/24 04:15 PM
3

Dating through your social circle is just one possible strategy. If apps work, do that. If approaching people works, do that. But commonly people on here say "I get 0 matches on apps, I'm too scared to approach strangers, and I hate clubs so what do I do". In those cases developing your social circle is the next logical step to try. You can develop friendships into relationships but the best benefit of social circles is being introduced to lots of new people through your friends. Friendships als…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/24 04:26 PM
3

First priority should be to make yourself attractive. But if you have been getting laid for years and still have nothing to say about good sex and you explicitly tell people that men shouldn't try to make their partner orgasm I'm gonna think you don't care about good sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/24 03:07 PM
2

I guess we just have different ideas of what success means. I consider a top doctor/researcher who has a wife and kids to be successful. I think its possible to be a "nerd" and successful. I would still consider a UFC fighter to be successful even if they are only good at fighting. Also you can have an ego and still be a nice person. Yeah I'd say IB and ivy league people tend to have a high opinion of themselves but I know many who are still kind and trustworthy to the people in their lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/24 03:04 PM
5

Its relevant if you want to have good sex. My point is that these redpill guys don't care about good sex, only about having access to sex, because they see access to sex as a form of power and status. Also no, you can have tons of sex and still have terrible sex if you aren't trying.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/24 01:04 PM
2

lol the cope is so strong "even if they are nice to everyone around them in private they are all secretly terrible people" good people can be successful, sorry to disappoint you.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/24 01:03 PM
2

Just sharing some personal stories of successful people I know who are nice is enough to disprove your idea that "being a selfish asshole who only cares what is best for you and disregards everyone else is the only way to get anywhere in life". I'm not saying some assholes don't become successful, I'm saying you don't HAVE to be an asshole to be successful.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 05:49 PM
13

None of the successful people I know personally live like this. And I am talking: Tech executives Doctors and researchers who are at the top of their field My peers in high school who were cool and got laid but also went to ivy league schools My peers in college who went on to prestigious quant and ib jobs People I train with who are ex-UFC fighters or very successful competitors in their own right Basically all of these people are friendly and relatively kind. They all have social networks of p…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 05:29 PM
2

Being a nice person doesn't help that much when it comes to getting women. But you still have to be nice TO HER. So you need to be nice to succeed in dating, but only to the person you want to date.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 05:26 PM
2

Hey dude I remember you. Hope you are doing well. Have you found that non-fat girlfriend yet?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 02:02 AM
15

yeah if you ever listen to a redpill podcast you quickly realize these guys never talk about the actual act of sex. They are obsessed with fucking hot girls but spend no time actually talking about how to have good sex. This is because they don't care about the sex itself, their motivation for sex is purely as an indicator of status and a way of asserting power over women. The denial of effort (redpill guys even say you shouldn't care about making your partner orgasm) is another way of asserting…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 01:53 AM
12

Lol interesting take. It is kinda insane how Tate openly calls his mom a dumb whore for sleeping with his dad. There is likely some self-hate going on with these guys, they have daddy issues and it manifests in a reflexive hate towards women. Either they have to admit dad their is the one who is at fault or just blame their moms for being whores. Because these guys all secretly crave affection from their dads they blame the moms and triple down on it by saying ALL women are dirty whores. This do…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 01:49 AM
1

The good outcome would be they are able to change to the point where they overcome the object of their shame. However, if that is impossible (following the idea that inevitably some men will end up being forever alone) then the best outcome is to make peace with their shame in a way to lessen it. Being forever alone is a terrible situation though. The shame will likely persist in some form forever, a nagging reminder that your body wishes for something you are not capable of.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 10:29 PM
9

I agree. But also women seeing some men get addicted to porn and fork over massive amounts of money to OF hoes makes them question the whole "save yourself and fully put your trust in a man to lead/provide" thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 10:24 PM
29

I have a theory a lot of redpill dudes (fans of tate and F&F) know deep down they wouldn't be good trad fathers or doing so would conflict with their desired lifestyle. So the trad stuff is just an illusion to signal moral superiority and internally justify engaging in promiscuity.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 10:20 PM
20

I think some just like the feeling of desecrating a pure, traditional woman. It gives them a sense of power to know this woman is giving up something valuable to them (their purity) in exchange for very little in return.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 10:18 PM
8

Maybe for some men. For others they demand a virgin, or a woman who lets them have sex without commitment/investment. So it can be framed as "I just want to be desired" when in reality being desired means a set of demands that don't necessarily correlate with desire. These men are framing their insecurity about attraction as a need for affection to try to manipulate their partner into having sex with them. Its a similar sort of situation to women who use their insecurity about attraction to mani…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 10:13 PM
1

Because she thinks he is interesting and attractive and could see herself happily dating him? Its not just about being a stat sheet, its about them having a level of chemistry that makes her want to try a date. The fitness and wealth helps to show he is competent, self-sufficient, and cares about his health. What makes her interested in him specifically is their actual interaction. It can take a while to find someone with genuine chemistry, this guy just has to keep trying. Friends could help by…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 12:03 AM
1

Going for overweight types is a viable strategy. He can easily show he is fit in his photos. Taking dates to nice dinners and back to his nice apartment helps show his wealth. Apps, social circle, repeat until you find someone. Its not that complicated.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 10:07 PM
–

you are too cool for sex
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 10:06 PM
1

Being under 30, making six figures, and being fit puts you in the top 10% of men easily (Top 1% income at age 28 is 150k). So even going with the redpill 80/20 rule thing this hypothetical guy should be alright, especially if he doesn't just go after the most attractive women. Six figures and fit might not get you far with instagram-model women, but your average woman isn't getting hit up by fit, wealthy young guys constantly. However, tech guys usually live in HCOL and high income areas with sh…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 09:37 PM
–

Well the idea is that if you improve then you will end up with a relationship. Obviously its not guaranteed but generally society puts forth the idea that putting in the effort (good mental/physical health, good career, hobbies) leads to a relationship. They aren't literally telling men to work hard for nothing. Is there better advice?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 06:36 PM
1

I agree with you, just curious, what makes someone an "adult loser"?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 05:19 PM
–

Wow so I guess finding a relationship is super easy. A woman can literally hate you and think you are invisible and you can still get her to marry you. I didn't know it was that easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 04:57 PM
–

70% of men are in relationships, how is that possible when only 10% are even visible to women? hmmmmm
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 04:55 PM
–

This is so true. The best advice comes from your own trial-and-error and from the people closest to you. Everyone wants to take an online course and then walk into the world with a 100% success rate but dating isn't that simple, especially when you consider that women do have different tastes and you need to find your crowd. As you get more and more niche the success rate increases.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 04:54 PM
–

CNN is literally running stories about how men are historically unsuccessful in dating, I feel like its being acknowedged now. https://www.cnn.com/videos/us/2023/02/25/smr-young-men-in-trouble.cnn The difference is that the response isn't "these women should stop being so picky and only wanting chad" its generally "men should work harder on x/y/z" So is that an ok way to acknowedge the situation?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 04:51 PM
–

Some guy said that incels aren't mad they don't get picked, they are mad that women are dishonest about their attraction. Then the bluepill lady responded and said women are honest about their attraction. Then you responded and said women actually aren't always honest about their attraction. So do you think women should be more honest and avoid settling down with men they don't find as attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 04:46 PM
1

I feel like having kids is important for most people on an emotional level. Even if you fail its still a meaningful experience to create new life and raise it. There is just a piece of your life that feels missing until you have kids. Most people feel that and want to have kids, not because they think their kids will be super successful. Ideally society will see there is a place for those who have kids and those who don't. People who have kids will create future taxpayers and essentially help co…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 04:44 PM
–

About 1% of men are virgins past the age of 30. So I think the chance of an adult man making six figs, being physically active, and still being a virgin is very low, even if they are 5'8.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 04:37 PM
–

So you think the real issue incels have is that women aren't picky enough?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 04:33 PM
5

What good comes from shaming people who tried their best to find relationships but couldn't succeed? Why is it necessary? I think you can inspire people to pursue relationships off of the goodness of relationships alone. You don't need an extra punishment for being chronically single, that is enough of a punishment in itself. I agree that people who fail at relationships will always feel some personal sense of shame, but whats the point in adding to that?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 04:09 PM
1

Sounds good to me. Planning on doing that soon?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 02:19 PM
1

But you just admitted that the vast majority of women WILL compromise. They don't actually filter that strictly for height, income, and status. Again, only 30% of men aren't single and around 96% of adult men will have relationship and sexual experience at some point.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 04:50 AM
1

Most men don't end up with their "ideal" partner either. Men go crazy for the most attractive 10%, the average woman doesn't get nearly the attention and favors a top 10% woman gets. So both men and women generally end up with someone who isn't the "most" attractive. However, emotional pair bonding allows us to love each other even when we know our partners aren't perfect. So... what is the problem? You are just describing normal human behavior; people generally want more than they can manage bu…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 04:41 AM
1

What are your main ways to ensure a stable relationship? I would think having a partner who loves/likes you would be one of the main ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 04:29 AM
1

Your statistics don't support your conclusion. You literally admit that only 30% of men are single, but most men do not meet those height or income standards. So why are only 30% of men single when women only want a guy who makes six figures or is over six feet tall? The logical conclusion is that most women don't have crazy standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 04:24 AM
1

Do you care whether or not your life partner actually likes you?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/24 03:47 PM
1

What percent of the overall male population commits suicide before 30? Has to be pretty low.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/24 01:12 AM
1

If you buy a good/service from someone do you expect them to be truthful about its quality?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 05:32 PM
0

Do you expect the fire department to help if your house is on fire?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 05:25 PM
0

I made an overall point: If you are very unattractive becoming attractive means changing a lot about yourself, and if you really want a relationship then you should be willing to put in this effort. Is there something I'm missing?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 05:09 PM
-1

Yeah we do, as a participant in society you owe everyone else your obedience to its fundamental principles and its laws.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 05:07 PM
0

How about you find those people and then you all go off to the jungle together and have fun. Don't involve the rest of us please.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 04:38 PM
1

Yes, if you are very unattractive becoming attractive means changing a lot about yourself. Its achievable though. That dude could totally take photos of himself where he isn't dressed like spiderman, he could develop other interests besides anime. People will train to run triathlons for fun, if having a relationship is that important then put in some effort.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 04:35 PM
1

No one is going to trust you to have kids with unless you can prove you are motivated and competent. Its kind of a catch-22; you can't get motivation without kids but you need to be motivated for someone to have kids with you. The only solution is to have a delayed-gratification mindset, you have to convince yourself that motivation now WILL result in what you want later.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 04:29 PM
-1

Do you acknowledge that those other factors (like your personality, competence, etc) can lead to primal attraction?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 03:42 PM
0

Do you believe visceral attraction is immediate and binary (either you have it or you never will) or is it something that can grow within a person?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 03:41 PM
3

I mean if existence requires rape to continue (not saying it does just granting that to you) then theres a strong argument it is unethical. Don't think thats a moral question you can just wave away. Also just keep in mind that dating wasn't really a thing for most of human history. In the past women were spoils of war, literally just sold, or given through arranged marriages. Its very new that men are expected to go out, enter specific dating scenarios (apps, clubs, etc), find women themselves, …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 03:38 PM
1

There has never been a good "effortless" relationship. Maybe it feels easy at the start but it takes tons of effort to keep intense intimacy going for years. Guys who put in no effort will end up squandering the initial attraction and be "blindsided" when their gf tells them its not working out. I agree guys should not try to force attraction and should prioritize people who are receptive but thats not the same as saying the relationship should be effortless.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 03:32 PM
3

Thats not true, less than 1% of men are virgins by the age of 30. https://datepsychology.com/are-27-of-young-men-really-virgins-and-why/ That implies some dating experience (unless you think its all escorts or hookups).
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 03:28 PM
5

You can believe that chads exist while still believing normal dudes can find love and desire. But the redpill takes things a step further and says that not only do women have attraction to chad, but that its impossible for them to feel genuine desire towards any "non-chad". This is what forces redpillers to say that women constantly marry men they don't even like, living double lives so they can squeeze money out of some poor sucker. Its an awful, nonsensical view of the world. You can find love…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 12:57 PM
1

I agree with everything you said, my point was just that 1-3 sex partners is most desired on average, I didn't go into why. Lots of people on here (not you ofc) think the average 21yo woman has 20+ partners so I didn't even bother with the "its normal" argument. Also the idea that there even is a distinction between high and low SO personalities is usually too much nuance for discussion here. Usually I'm talking with people who think every woman wants to sleep with as many chads as possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 12:46 PM
12

This is a little misleading. https://datepsychology.com/body-count-and-sexual-double-standards/ Studies show that men are more desiring of a low-body count partner for LTRs than women but that women still prefer someone with a "low" bodycount. A study by Stewart-Williams et al. (2016) found that for women, willingness to engage in a LTR peaks when the guy has 2 past partners. Willingness starts dropping past 5 partners with women being very unwilling to date a guy with more than 20 past partners…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 03:39 AM
4

That could work, might raise lots of questions long-term though.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 03:28 AM
6

Yes, to a point. If you are a late-teens or early/mid-20s guy definitely lie. There are plenty of women who aren't super experienced themselves (these are the kind of women you will likely be dating as an inexperienced dude yourself) and you can get away with being vague about some past sexual experience. Also its not really expected for a late-teens or early 20s guy to be amazing at sex so you can fumble a bit without instantly killing the vibe. As you get older (into your 30s) conversations be…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/24 04:42 PM
2

Can you link this government research?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/24 06:57 PM
2

I often see incels online say "the average man is one breakup away from inceldom". The thing is this is kinda true, and illuminates what being an "incel" really means. It is totally normal to spend months trying and failing to find a relationship. Feelings of unrequited love and loneliness are near universal. Basically everyone has spent time in their lives where they wanted a romantic partner but couldn't find one. For normal people struggling with dating is a part of life. But for incels, it i…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/24 06:56 PM
-5

If your goal is to have a family then being "marriage material" is essential. If you just want sex its better to be the hookup guy. The fallacy I hear a lot is that being "marriage material" means you are not considered attractive. Even if I grant it means there was not the extreme initial attraction, it still grew over time to a point where the woman wants to spend the rest of her life with you. If your perspective is that casual sex once means very attracted whereas spending decades together, …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/24 10:00 PM
1

Yes I edited my comment to add more information within 5 minutes of posting it initially. I don't even understand how thats considered a "trick" but whatever. No one is forcing you to talk to me, I think I've done a great job proving everything I say and you clearly have no evidence for the wacky things you believe (like that tons of women are marrying men they don't love). I feel good about the conversation, if you wanna end it here fine by me.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/24 10:13 PM
1

Im not trying to trick you lol, I want an honest debate. I think so far its been clear I'm acting in good faith.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/24 09:46 PM
1

yes, I edited my comment to make it longer
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/24 09:36 PM
1

You claiming women "spend their teen and 20's "having fun" with alphas, and settle for betas they don't love in their 30's" is completely unrealistic. Its way more nuanced than that.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/24 07:47 PM
1

So I guess everyone is lying in every study ever and its just a coincidence that STD distributions match up with self-reported partner counts... Also all these women in an "alphas rotation" are fucking other guys too. They know its not a committed relationship and are sleeping around with other guys. This is the promiscuous 10%.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/24 03:11 PM
1

Lol I don't think 10% of women even know a drug-addict criminal.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/24 02:17 AM
1

So first of all I guess you concede that the majority of men CAN find relationships but according to you they are "beta" relationships. So now lets go over the alpha fux beta bux thing. Its dumb for multiple reasons: Other studies show there is an ~10% gap in singleness for young men and women. This can be easily explained by women dating older men. https://ifstudies.org/blog/theres-no-huge-gender-gap-in-being-single-among-young-adults If women were getting pumped and dumped by alphas they would…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/24 02:12 AM
–

That doesn't contradict what I said. ~60% of men under 30 are single but overall only 30% of men are single. That disproves the claim "the vast majority of men are pathetic losers who can't get a relationship"
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/24 04:24 PM
3

whats the upper bound of the range? From 10%-?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/24 04:18 PM
1

It means the vast majority of women will not consider men who don't treat them with kindness. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0191886906000900?casa_token=xFNFS6SykNwAAAAA:hbCnC4AyzPISoO-LRvzJrJUyRRDbCbAW3DhzSn7FBuBcXtPQm0z8zhcurdvTl3lmBNGxDke1qA Sociologists frequently find kindness is one of the most highly ranked characteristics in a romantic partner for men and women. Also in my personal experience I have never seen anyone get a relationship without being kind. I knew one "…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/24 03:56 PM
1

Yes and if they want to attract a woman they will be nice/kind to her. Also you can be nice and have boundaries and confidence. Being nice doesn't mean being spineless and accepting authority, it just means considering the feelings of others and doing things that make them feel good. Even Andrew Tate admits he acts nice and loving to women hes trying to attract.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/24 03:48 PM
5

What percent of women do you think date drug-addict criminals?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/24 03:44 PM
–

Here is evidence against the claim "the vast majority of men are pathetic losers who can't get a relationship" https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/08/20/a-profile-of-single-americans/ According to this only ~30% of men are single.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/24 03:43 PM
1

This just isn't true. Women date more attractive nice men and ignore less attractive nice men.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/24 03:22 PM
0

Women generally date men who are nice to them. Being nice is the bare minimum to be considered dateable. Outside of that other things matter like attractiveness, status, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/24 03:22 PM
1

I'll look into this more. I've found some research supporting the idea that divorce is indirectly related to economic strength and some rejecting it. I admit I need to do more work before I make a statement on this. https://www.jstor.org/stable/352066 https://epublications.marquette.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1248&context=econ_fac Still disagree that relationships are not positive for men. If you want a family you need a LTR, and having a family is positive. Not saying there isn't risk but …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/24 02:33 PM
2

Those numbers are just the amount of men who are currently single, it has very little to do with whether they will be chronically single their entire lives. The number of chronically single men has always been very low and much lower than the percent of currently single young men. Even before online dating it was normal for around 50% of young men to be single at a time. However, the vast majority of people find success eventually.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/24 04:40 PM
1

Married men face higher pressure to earn more and to keep themselves healthy, they also take fewer risks and commit less crime. So that is a causal explaination for the relationship. All these correlations are bidirectional. Marriage incentivizes men to earn more, be healthy, etc and ALSO married men tend to be healthier, earn more, etc. Its not just one way.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/24 02:54 PM
13

Women have multiple friends. Some of her friends she is more willing to date, some of them there is 0 attraction. The outcome depends on that.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/24 02:48 PM
2

Ok so why didn't you say "we have to wait a few decades to know how many men are undatable"? Where did that 20-30% number come from?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/24 02:45 PM
1

Do you have any evidence? The divorce rate doesn't seem to map onto the economic conditions of the country. If divorce was tied to economic security you would expect to see divorce rates increase after 2010 because of the end of the recession, but they didn't. There are studies done on online dating, the results are mixed: https://www.pnas.org/doi/10.1073/pnas.1222447110 This study (2005-2012, 19,000 respondents generally in their 30s) found that married couples who met online were slightly less…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/24 03:32 AM
6

Studies find around 3% of men aged 45 and older report never having been in a relationship: (8% of College educated men are never married at age 45, 12% of non-college educated) https://np.reddit.com/r/dataisbeautiful/comments/111ege5/oc_forever_alone_degrees_of_higher_education/ (21% of unmarried people 40 and older have never been in a relationship) https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/08/20/a-profile-of-single-americans/ Maybe these results are not accurate, but I don't think the ac…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/24 12:47 AM
1

Do you have evidence that the divorce rate has increased since online dating began? All evidence points to the divorce rate declining over time. https://ifstudies.org/blog/the-us-divorce-rate-has-hit-a-50-year-low
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/24 12:40 AM
4

There are men who just don't try. But if you mean "perpetually single despite trying" I agree with you. I would be interested to see what percent of men you think fit that label though.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 11:15 PM
1

I'd pick Heather. I value intelligence and if she likes the same music thats a big green flag. The biggest negative is I wouldn't want to be with someone who is just "content", ideally I would mean more to them than that. Wouldn't want to be with Mina because she would demean my intelligence which would get annoying because I like talking about stuff. Not Suzy because she also sounds annoying and going out every weekend would be tiring. Anna also seems annoying. Thinking about it more I guess I …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 09:47 PM
1

Lol I love how on here the "deranged feminist bluepill" ideas are that marriage is good. I believe marriage is generally good for everyone, men and women. Thats a normal opinion to have and is supported by numerous studies on happiness, health, life expectancy, and income.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 09:32 PM
9

Yes, casual sex is easier for women. Has anyone ever denied this?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 09:28 PM
1

Looking at marriage status by age 46 around 70% of people with a bachelors or higher were still in their first marriage. Around 26% of the people with a bachelors or higher had ever divorced compared to 48% of people with less than high school and 43% of people with only high school. https://www.bls.gov/opub/mlr/2013/article/pdf/marriage-and-divorce-patterns-by-gender-race-and-educational-attainment.pdf That study was done a while ago but trends are still consistent in modern day. https://www.pe…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 09:18 PM
1

The current divorce rate is 35% and that is not counting second marriages and is including very poor and uneducated people who get married. If you get married in 2024 and both you and your spouse have a college degree and make over 50k a year the divorce rate is likely under 20% (considering the divorce rate for college educated couples is 25%). Also if you want kids and a family being in a LTR (marriage or not) is essential. I'd say having a family is a massive advantage to lots of men and it r…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 05:45 PM
1

Okay so we agree a relationship has value if its benefits outweigh the drawbacks. That doesn't mean relationships as a whole are not positive for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 04:57 PM
2

They received romantic attention because they were in a relationship. Do you seriously think the two are unrelated? Lets do a sanity check here, do you agree with this statement: "A relationship has value if it leads to romantic attention".
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 04:38 PM
2

You don't pay child support until the child is born (which republicans are trying to change). And after the child is born the father has parental rights.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 04:06 PM
3

They separated by looking at quality and type of relationship and found that more established relationships (like marriage) and healthier relationships have a better effect on mental health. Relationship distress is associated with negative mental health outcomes. Overall though, relationship status, whether you are in a relationship or not, is bidirectionally associated with positive mental health outcomes. However, I agree you can get romantic attention without a relationship. That is not esse…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 04:05 PM
2

I don't think you can separate the two. Relationships basically always involve romantic attention. If they didn't you wouldn't see these results where relationship status, not romantic attention, has a strong effect.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 03:45 PM
3

There is common-law marriage in some states, true. The issue with marriage and kids is that if you are married the husband automatically goes on the birth certificate as the father. You might criticize that, but in situations where the father is not on the birth certificate (like unmarried couples) the mother can put the child up for adoption without the fathers consent (at least in Ohio I believe). Changing a birth certificate is difficult, compounded by the fact that the state doesn't want to …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 03:43 PM
1

Can you rephrase the question? The study is about the impact of romantic relationships on mental health.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 03:35 PM
10

"Most people are sexually active (and the GSS also shows that most sex occurs within committed relationships, see: How Many Sexual Partners Did Men and Women Have in 2022?). Additionally, a similar percentage of men and women are sexually inactive. This leaves the remaining 20% in a mating pool with one another. An additional percentage (perhaps 6-10% based on the distribution above) may accumulate an additional annual partner through serial monogamy; these are people who have switched from one …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 03:22 PM
2

Well, I disagree. Romantic relationships are shown to have incredibly positive impacts on mental health. Also, you get laid. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2352250X16300252 And relationships are an indicator of attraction. You are giving someone sexual access for months if not years as well as spending tons of time with them. In a liberal social framework where relationships are not forced attraction does matter.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 03:17 PM
1

True in most cases, many women don't care though. Also people are delusional and either believe they aren't going to get pregnant or they blindly trust birth control.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:33 PM
3

Nope, once you nut your biological information is entering the body of someone else. Its on them to have the final say in decisions until the fetus is a person or they are no longer carrying it in their body. The father has no right to violate the autonomy of the woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:32 PM
6

If the bio dad ran away in the first place he probably has no interest in raising the kid and will not do a good job. Dunno if the grandparents will be interested either. Its a shitty situation all around, I think the mother should have default responsibility though. She chose to carry the child despite knowing the truth, its on her now to raise it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:29 PM
1

I can't account for every individual interaction, only the broad idea that if a man tries consistently and sets his standards low enough he will eventually get laid. The only thing that could prevent that is by making the woman fear for her safety by being creepy. That would be his fault in that case.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:27 PM
1

okay good luck
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:25 PM
3

There is a difference between assault and a consensual medical procedure designed to keep the mother safe. The mother and the fetus are being beaten against her will, a mother CHOOSES to have an abortion. There is also a massive difference in safety and health risk.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:23 PM
14

"I think if the mother is sitting in prison for 5 years on paternity fraud charges, most men are going to be just fine taking care of the child. Any kid is better off without a mom like that anyway." Lol no way. You are saying not only was I deceived for years into spending untold time and resources into another man's kid, now I have to raise that kid as a single dad? This would only work if the kid was sent to the biological father. Would be a terrible outcome for the kid though.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:21 PM
–

I agree with this post 100%. If I were to try to represent the other side though, the issue is not that they want men to keep raising the kids even when they feel no connection, the issue is that the men lost the connection in the first place after learning the truth. You say: "You are free to believe that fatherhood is not dependent on genes. And to some extent, you are even right as adoptive dads exist." But then following this isn't it natural people who have this belief would criticize men f…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:19 PM
1

For most women yeah but you gotta lower your standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:14 PM
2

I knew a bunch of guys like that in high school. They were friendly with girls but it never led to a girlfriend or romantic experience. I fit that definition myself, actually. There is a difference between being jokey/friendly and actually building attraction. Most of us were too nervous/shy to actually try flirting so we stayed as friends. All those guys, including me, did eventually find romantic success in college. I think it comes down to being late bloomers and not having the right social c…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:12 PM
1

Andrew Tate has a specific sexual strategy based around him being jacked, tall, a pro fighter, and rich. You can't copy his additude if you don't have the skills and looks to back it up.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:08 PM
2

Basically any guy can get laid as long as he isn't awkward/creepy and his standards are low enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:06 PM
-1

Women are more likely to have sex with someone they know than a random person. The idea that women ignore all the men in their lives and chase randos is just not true, people overwhelmingly have sex within relationships or situationships (where they know the person).
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:05 PM
8

I know two types of people who are generally very successful with women: "Bro types" who don't necessarily have female friends but are often in social spaces with women and have no issue socially engaging with women at parties and events. Very socially active guys who are nice and very well liked by everyone. By nature of being very active and doing lots of stuff these guys have all sorts of random skills and know everyone. Here is why your title is wrong, the ability to make friends and sociall…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/24 02:00 PM
5

You have to understand he has never received sexual pleasure or romantic validation from a woman (except for one kiss I guess). Its got to the point where his psychology has totally disconnected actual women from romance and sex and displaced the desire onto AI. So you accuse him of only valuing women for sexual pleasure and romantic validation when its literally the opposite. He doesn't see actual women as a possible avenue for romance or sex anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/24 04:42 PM
1

Yes, they found that disgust increases with less attractive faces. But there was a significant increase in disgust levels even for attractive faces. They also found sexual arousal does not decrease the disgust of imagining sex with a stranger. <image> This is a possible explaination from the paper: "The mixed findings in women could also be explained by the sex-specific challenges in evolutionary history (Buss and Schmitt 1993). Women face greater potential costs from sexual intercourse, because…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 06:36 PM
7

Both genders are looking for the same thing except women have access to 3x more options (at minimum). That skews the dynamics for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 01:13 PM
9

Ok well I guess we agree then. Btw no one on here is talking about dating in eastern countries, this is a forum primarily for discussing dating in the west.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 01:10 PM
10

Yes but its harder for the men to get there. They have to face mountains of rejection while the woman sifts through potentially hundreds of normal, kind guys looking for someone worthy enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 01:06 PM
4

I disagree with your "facts" Attraction for women works differently than for men. Women do not instantly feel sexually attracted to men by looks alone except in very extreme circumstances. This is why women will literally never accept a hookup with a stranger whereas ~60% of men will. Women also rate having sex with a very attractive stranger as disgusting (though sex with a less attractive stranger is significantly more disgusting). Zsok F, Fleischman DS, Borg C, Morrison E. 2017. Disgust Trump…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 01:01 PM
–

The idea is to show what kind of matches women can get on tinder. Plenty of people on here agree its easier for women to get matches but say those matches are either extremely unattractive, hypersexual, or just total losers (no job, etc). The point of this experiment was to see if that was true, could a normal women get 7 dates with attractive, normal guys in a week or would all her matches just be sex fiends and losers? Turns out for the average woman it takes less than a day to find 7 normal g…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/24 09:21 PM
4

On their own they won't but they give you opportunities you can take advantage of to find relationships. If one of your friends has a girlfriend she can introduce you to a single friend of hers. If one of your friends gets invited to a party he can bring you along and you can meet girls there. If one of your friends is going to hang out with a group he can bring you along and you can be introduced to the group. There are more examples but this is off the top of my head. You still need to be able…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/24 09:17 PM
–

About average in age and looks, have a normal bio. Is that what you mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/24 09:14 PM
–

The woman did not participate, she just gave OP the photos to use for the account. The woman (in the photos) was supposed to be around average in age and looks. OP did all the messaging and swiping.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/24 09:11 PM
–

Thanks for doing this. It should be obvious that women have it much easier in online dating compared to men considering the ratio is 3:1 men to women on Tinder and thats before you subtract all the bots and women who just use it for validation or barely at all. And I mean easier in all regards. Its easier to find sex, easier to find a LTR, easier to get a free meal. Everything is easier for women on OLD because they have so many more options.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/24 09:10 PM
–

This was a reverse tinder experiment. Rather than a woman running a guys tinder account this was a guy running a womans tinder account to see her experience. The bet was that this guy (using an average womans account) could not get 7 dates in a week with men who were kind, fairly attractive, and had jobs. OP proved them wrong in 18 hours.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/24 09:07 PM
2

Well for those single guys building up a social circle is gonna take work and effort but the dynamics are not nearly as complex as finding a relationship. I disagree that men who are single are unlikely to be able to form male friendships. It might be difficult for them but its very achievable, especially if they find friends from within their hobbies.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/24 08:53 PM
3

I don't get what the confusion is. Having more friends makes it easier to get warm introductions to single women. Having more friends also generally means better social skills which makes it easier to date. Not saying you need a big social circle to find a girlfriend but having one definitely helps, especially if currently your only options for dating are online. But it seems you are implying there are some men who just can't do either, they can't make friends or find a relationship, no matter h…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/24 08:37 PM
20

If an individual is asking for advice the best advice will always be focused to that individual. Yes, there are things we can do on a societal level to make it easier for men to socialize but that doesn't help the person seeking advice currently. To help the individual they need to be guided towards improvement in their own life, rather than waiting for some major societal change.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/24 08:27 PM
1

Yes but they could if they needed to
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/24 08:23 PM
1

So you would say the majority of women you meet instantly want to fuck you? Thats pretty impressive.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/24 01:22 AM
5

What percent of women get pumped and dumped by chads? How did you get to that number? Redpillers talk about this world where most women have a promiscuous past sleeping with chad then settle down with beta billy and give him pity sex before divorcing him. There is no evidence that actually happens though. Its basically a victimhood fantasy, like BLM activists who say every time black people interact with police they get assaulted.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/24 12:55 AM
4

How do you know the majority of women are hoes? How did you figure this out?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/24 12:49 AM
–

Thanks for agreeing with me. And yes, this sub is full of social retards, I get it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:59 PM
–

The concession I will make is its usually not JUST studying. But yes, it is totally possible to be too busy to have the time to invest in dating success.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:58 PM
–

People go through cycles of loneliness. Maybe at 25 someone goes through a breakup and moves to a new city. Now they are lonely. But I'm guessing you are not talking about that, you are talking about someone who has always been lonely up to age 25. If that person is defective, what should they do?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:56 PM
2

NFL players don't have normal lives, should they stop playing football?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:54 PM
1

I can't think of a single example where that is the case. Typically people ended up dating within similar groups they hooked up with. All the athlete-chasers got passed around but then would eventually date one of the athletes, not a random guy. All the nerdy/artsy girls would hook up with nerdy/artsy guys (rarely) and end up dating someone from that group. Maybe its because outside of a few communities in my school hookups weren't that common. For the most part people would have FWB that would …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:50 PM
0

What are your standards for a partner?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:44 PM
–

Why should they have done that? What if they want a career in STEM and are okay with waiting to date?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:42 PM
–

Maybe your brother is just really smart. Individual differences in intelligence exist. Maybe work that takes the average STEMlord 3 hours takes him 30 minutes.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:37 PM
–

I don't know how often it happens, thats not my argument. My argument is just that it is possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:34 PM
–

For some people it is. Not just studying though, its studying/working/clubs/self-care. Also I love how I made a totally valid point about dating success taking lots of time and your response was "whatever"
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:33 PM
–

I agree that personal responsibility matters, I disagree that someone being lonely means they are "selfish" and "struggle with empathy". It seems like you have bought into the just world fallacy where if someone fails it has to be because of some negative defect and not bad luck, circumstance, or the effects of others. Learning can take time. Telling people that they are defective and a selfish person if they are lonely actually prevents them from learning and feeling confident enough to interac…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:31 PM
–

Okay? And some people can't do that.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:26 PM
–

Dating takes lots of time. Its not just about "meeting anyone" its about meeting the right person. Someone might have time to date but not enough time to put in the work required to actually succeed. In that case it could make sense to wait until later.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:24 PM
–

You are just wrong. Its not that difficult to avoid social gatherings, some people just don't ever get invited and its scary to seek them out if you don't know anyone "Someone is lonely in college so it must be deliberate" is just so wrong and goes against my own experience and that of literally hundreds of people I know. College can be a lonely, isolating place even if you want to reach out and be social. It has nothing to do with being selfish. https://www.totalcareaba.com/statistics/student-s…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:20 PM
–

Depends on the situation, its impossible to make a blanket statement like that. Don't forget some people have to work while in college.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:15 PM
–

Too nervous Only in male-dominated spaces and friend groups Not good at flirting, lack confidence in their sexuality Lack of any romantic attention from women (contributes to point 3) Basically everyone in my HS friend group (including me) were total virgins until graduation (but we all got laid within the first few years of college). It was mostly for those reasons. I knew tons of people (men and women) who were still virgins at graduation, its not that weird anymore. The percent of people grad…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:14 PM
–

No one cares bro, make some actual friends and whine to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:07 PM
–

There are also tons of situations where it is reasonable to not have time to date in college.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:04 PM
–

If you are working part time and trying to get straight As in hard classes and doing extracurricular clubs its feasible that you don't have much time for dating. Maybe you met your husband in class but thats not reality for lots of people in college. They have to really put themselves out there and consistently try to find a partner. That takes time.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 02:02 PM
1

How do you know 5 percent of men have this ability if they don't use it. It would be like me saying: "about 3 percent of humans can fly, they just choose not to". The statement is worthless because there is no evidence, it is unfalsifiable.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 09:37 PM
1

What is your goal? Is your goal to have consistent sex? Is your goal to have a family? If you said yes to either of those two it pays to be a "good" man. If a women has the goal of being in a relationship she shouldn't settle for being a booty call. Its all about what you want. The scenario everyone brings up is a case where chad hits it right away and the "good" guy is forced to wait but gets a relationship. We are comparing having sex with a woman once and right away to waiting a month but hav…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 09:33 PM
–

0.01% is much closer to the truth than 5% You say chads have 50 different sexual partners a year, only 1% of men reported between 11-20 partners in 2022. There is no data beyond that because so few men reported past 20. It might not be 0.01% but it is way closer to that than to 5%. Its definitely below 1% but how far below is tbd. https://datepsychology.com/how-many-sexual-partners-did-men-and-women-have-in-2022/ We can deduce the percentage in other ways though. If a chad has 50 new partners a …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 09:26 PM
–

Except by this definition most women will never actually meet a chad. Men who can get women to fuck them by looks alone are in the top 0.01%. Try walking up to women and saying "have sex with me tonight". Basically every single man will fail at this 100% of the time. Studies of college students have consistently shown this, women are disgusted at the thought of casual sex with a stranger even if they are conventionally attractive. A true chad might exist, but is very rare. Women might dream abou…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 07:43 PM
1

He wants a family and wants to have sex hundreds of times a year rather than around 10 times a year. You may have to wait but then you get access to sex every day vs just pursuing hookups where you will be lucky to get 10 different partners a year.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 07:37 PM
–

If you are talking a short term (around 1-2 years) relationship that involves having sex with her hundreds of times as well as intimate acts like cuddling. If she is a good girlfriend she will cook for you and buy/make you gifts. If you extend the possibility to longer relationships it could involve having kids and creating a family. So yes, there are many ways to get a "win" over the guy who hits it once and leaves. Also just doing casual hookups does not lead to consistent sex. Very few men ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 07:35 PM
–

What if she is a virgin who is waiting for marriage? What if she only has sex with people she is in a relationship with? (assuming she has been consistent with this rule)
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 07:30 PM
–

Laws are currently gender neutral. There is no law stating that womens claims of sexual assault get taken more seriously than mens. You are describing a social factor. And I think its terrible that society is socially biased against men, I think that should change.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/24 02:10 PM
–

He should but its a 20 year old woman, I doubt she has more than 30k in savings.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/24 02:04 PM
–

What the woman did in this case is illegal. You aren't describing any sort of legal framework, you are describing an effect of social bias. We are more likely to believe men assault women because we see man as dangerous and women as innocent victims. That has nothing to do with the law though.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/24 02:03 PM
–

Emmett Till wasn't arrested, he was extrajudicially lynched. Manufacturing a crime is wrong, but you are overlooking the part where they murdered him before even doing any sort of investigation. In this case they did an investigation and exonerated the accused.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/24 02:00 PM
1

I was saying if there was a study where which showed that women who married later rated their husbands as significantly less attractive compared to earlier partners that could be proof of AF/BB happening. Also I thought women only dated chads until they hit their late 20s? If you are now saying some college women chase chad and some college women date normal dudes I'd agree with you. But the idea I've heard is that basically all college women only chase chad and don't give any attention to the r…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 04:40 PM
–

I would be interested to see how many young men think not being a virgin is a sign of bad character.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 03:51 PM
–

How so? She can still have a family.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 03:12 PM
–

I think we should provide mandatory genetic screenings at birth which include information about chronic disease risk and paternity info.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 03:12 PM
–

If I only had to eat once or twice and would get a massive reward I probably would. Also I am in favor of men getting paternity tests even if they don't have a real reason to suspect, I'd probably get one if I had a kid.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 02:19 PM
1

Now you are getting into amateur psychoanalyzing, "Well she might seem like she likes him but DEEP DOWN she doesn't really respect him". Every married woman I have known at least seems like they respect their husband. Maybe I need your expert disrespect detection abilities but I just don't see why someone would give so much power (having kids and a family) to someone they don't respect and trust.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 02:17 PM
1

why is it pointless?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 02:13 PM
–

We are assuming the guy at least thinks the kids are his. Thats usually how beta bucks are described, they aren't always stepdads. And in situations where the guy thinks the kids are his paternity fraud is hypothesized to be between 2-3% (but its hard to get an accurate number). So if I thinks the kids are his (and there are no massive red flags) the kids are probably his. https://www.discovermagazine.com/the-sciences/the-paternity-myth-the-rarity-of-cuckoldry Also women fare worse financially i…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 02:12 PM
–

And the redpill constantly states the modern world is kind to women. I guess they should agree with me on this. (Not saying you are redpill just making a general point)
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 02:06 PM
-2

I've never seen women have kids and a family with someone they never even liked. I'm sure it happens sometimes but I've never seen it myself so all I have are internet anecdotes. I have been with women who are crazy about me but I am young (and so are the women). I understand that if we keep dating for 10+ years and have kids we aren't going to feel the same crazy attraction and passion. Thats how relationships work, the early passion tends to fade over time.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 02:04 PM
1

Never said your evidence has to be a study. However, if there was some study which showed that women who married later rated their husbands as significantly less attractive. There is even some evidence against it. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S019188691500505X This is a study of college students (the time when women are chasing chad) and found that about 90% of the women said their romantic partner was within 1 point of attractiveness from themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 01:59 PM
–

The alternative of being single is generally seen as better than having kids with a guy you dislike.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 01:52 PM
–

If you have no evidence just admit it. You can say "well it needs to be studied because I think its happening". So you think women get married and have kids with a guy knowing they will divorce him and raise kids in a broken home? Interesting. Dead bedrooms exist but generally happen many years into the relationship. You can't compare the sex drive in a year-one relationship vs the sex drive in a year 8 relationship after they have both gotten fatter and had kids. It has nothing to do with alpha…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 01:49 PM
–

Wow being a beta is less common than I thought. (Paternity fraud rate is thought to be from 2-3%). https://www.discovermagazine.com/the-sciences/the-paternity-myth-the-rarity-of-cuckoldry
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 01:42 PM
–

Most people travel and have fun with their families. Also depending on your perspective having kids is better than partying. Maybe you would rather party, up to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 01:36 PM
–

Why would women have kids and a family with someone they don't feel a shred of attraction for vs just continue being single? We see that women are willing to be single if they don't get what they want, whats causing all these women to have kids with men they actually hate and think are ugly?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 01:32 PM
–

More desirable by what metric? If she doesn't date the beta when she is in her "party" phase but dates him when she wants a family thats a matter of perspective. Someone who wants a family would say she is more desirable when she is in her "family" phase.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 01:28 PM
–

Why would they have kids with someone they don't respect? Also how is the treatment of the beta guy different? I never see this supported with evidence, its always just "well she doesn't do anal" or "she isn't as exciting".
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/24 01:23 PM
1

Read the replies, Jake himself literally admits he is picky. He could easily get a gf if he wanted one.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 09:11 PM
3

"Jake feels like the only women that he attracts are unattractive" So to be clear Jake attracts plenty of women, just not ones he thinks are attractive (checking the replies Jake himself admits he is picky). Title is misleading. More accurate title: Case study: Why can't my picky, top 10% friend get a woman he considers attractive to date him?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 09:08 PM
2

Oh I got mixed up and thought you were saying the top 20% guys have sex with 10-30 women a year, my bad. I agree that looking at life in terms of comparing yourself to the general population is silly. Its better to find people who seem similar to you and see how successful they are. Then you see if you can emulate them or if you have to change to be something new. Also for what its worth I don't think OP is looking for life goals. Hes a pretty argumentative bluepill guy so I'm guessing hes looki…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 07:55 PM
4

Where are you getting your sexual partners # from? According to the general social survey only about 1% of men (18-35) reported over 10 sexual partners in the last year. And men are known to overinflate their partner count on surveys. https://datepsychology.com/how-many-sexual-partners-did-men-and-women-have-in-2022/ Also, echoing what other people have said, a top 20% man will not have all those qualities at once. Just plugging in over 5'10, over 100k income, not obese or married, and between a…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 07:38 PM
1

I'm not talking about a hypothetical future where all other birthrates drop to 0 I'm talking about literally right now. Would you say, right now, Niger is the most successful country in the world? If not, why?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 04:26 AM
1

So you agree its possible to have a meaningful relationship without sex or kids? I already explained why your question is irrelevant. This has nothing to do with my personal capabilities. Just because I cannot run a 4 minute mile doesn't mean running a 4 minute mile is impossible. "Donuts are bad" is a false analogy because that is an absolute statement. I have never made an absolute statement. A more accurate analogy is me saying "its possible donuts can be bad" and then eating donuts. I have s…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 04:10 AM
1

Why does it matter what I will personally do? I believe it is possible to have a meaningful relationship without sex or starting a family, even though I personally can't do that. I also think its possible to run a 4 minute mile, even though I can't personally do that. Do you not follow my logic? Do you not understand that what makes a relationship meaningful is partially dependent on the people in it? There are general principles (love, compassion, support, etc) that need to be met but the way t…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 01:19 AM
1

I'm assuming you are talking purpose in a naturalistic, biological sense (genes want to pass on) and not that the sole purpose of life is to have as many kids as possible. No one cares about the evolutionary, biological perspective. We can do way better than that. Would you genuinely say that Niger is the most successful country in the world because it has the highest birthrate? No, you would not. Because other things matter besides just pumping out kids. Like having the freedom to travel, being…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 07:40 PM
4

your logic is extremely stupid. Lets say I only listen to music without lyrics. All other music is pointless to me. Even if I believe that I can still defend the idea that music with lyrics can have a point to other people. Same thing with relationships. I even if I personally believe relationships only have a point if you have sex and start a family, I can easily defend relationships where neither of that happens. In that case, both people are choosing to not have sex and a family and instead l…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 07:12 PM
0

Humans raping animals? Nothing. I don't believe animals are worthy of moral consideration, they are fundamentally different from humans in that their lack of cognition and social awareness makes them unable to follow a basic social contract. I believe eating them for pleasure is justified and using them for sexual pleasure is justified as well. However, if you do rape animals for pleasure it probably means you are super weird, probably get off on inflicting pain and destruction and I don't want …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 05:14 PM
0

death cultist vs rape cultist which is better hmmmm
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 02:29 PM
3

Considering 85% of women want to date a guy who is either masculine or a mix or both it seems they haven't rejected masculinity in that sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 02:25 PM
1

Going by these results women are more driven then men to pursue power and money and overrepresented in higher education while also being much more likely to want a romantic partner who is more successful than them and having stricter requirements on looks and political views. So women are making more money but it seems they still generally want a tall, attractive, masculine guy who makes more money than them. However now you see an increased preference for liberalism as well and a reluctance to …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 02:19 PM
3

The difference is what the men want to do is gain happiness/security from forcing their desires on someone else. What the women want to do is gain happiness/security independently or through mutual cooperation. So the women are asking the men to not do something immoral and are asking men to do something moral (respect her wishes). The men are asking to do something immoral and to break their moral boundaries. Couching it in "well the women are asking this of half the population and men just wan…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 11:47 PM
1

I am speaking in terms of morality. I think morality should have a balance between personal freedom and achieving positive outcomes. This is why the right vs good distinction is important, it defines the boundaries of moral obligation where the positive outcomes supercede personal freedom. Maybe I am underestimating the damage, I don't think so. I think sexless and in prison for life is worse than being a sexless virgin and free. My point was that the "moral" incel who benefits from sex through …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 11:38 PM
3

It shows how these two scenarios: One wants a life in which men leave her alone. One wants a life in which one woman does not leave him alone. (despite her wanting to) Are not morally comparable. But yes a man wanting women to have sex with him and date him is not immoral. People take an issue when the women clearly say they are not interested but the men believe they are owed the date/sex/etc anyways because they are nice/moral/law-abiding.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 11:18 PM
1

There is a distinction between "good" and "right" Right: the action which should be taken generally because it balances better outcomes with general personal responsibility (moral obligations) Good: Any action that creates better outcomes Giving away all of your possessions to the poor is a good action because it would lead to an increase in overall happiness but not a right action because we cannot generalize as an obligation. The same goes with giving your body up (sexually or otherwise) for t…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 11:14 PM
5

Just pointing out that the obvious difference here is that gaining happiness/security from forcing your desires on someone else is less moral than gaining happiness/security independently or through mutual cooperation.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 10:53 PM
1

Yeah I just disagree that people should be socially ostracized for their decisions to sleep with (or not sleep with) another consenting adult. A world where we place heavy social value on how people engage sexually with other consenting adults would be less moral than our current one in my view.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 10:49 PM
1

You could find some poor, innocent person and give them money, thus doing your part to achieve a more moral society (which you claim all women must do to be moral). Obviously you can't totally solve it yourself but I'm sure there's more you could do. Just do be clear, do you believe a world where women are forced to sleep with innocent men such that they have a better sex life than criminals would be more moral than our current one?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 10:30 PM
1

Thats not how it works though. In your view, you are responsible if ANY innocent man is poorer than a criminal. You aren't saying "women should have sex with innocent men and not criminals" You are saying "a moral society requires all innocent men have better sex lives than all criminals and women are allowing that to happen so they are immoral" So you (and everyone else to be fair) are immoral because there are still poor innocent men and wealthier criminals. You are allowing that to happen. Bu…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 10:19 PM
2

I could see more of an argument for it being immoral for women to sleep with a serial killer but why is it immoral for women to NOT sleep with an innocent man? Why are all women responsible for the actions of an extreme minority? And if you are super invested in this idea of life outcome following morality, if I can show you an innocent man who is poorer than a criminal will you give your money to the poor man? After all, you are deciding to allow a innocent man to be poorer than a criminal, so …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 10:07 PM
2

I guess I don't consider it immoral to for an innocent man to be an incel (despite serial killers having sex). There is no guarantee that you will have a specific quality of life (aside from the very bare minimum) just because you follow the law. Our current legal system finds justice by ascribing punishment to fit the crime, but says nothing about your life after you serve the time. It is totally moral for a man to accept the punishment for his crime then go on to live a good life. It is totall…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 09:58 PM
2

There are other ways to be romantically undesirable besides breaking the law. Also you are assuming the women who slept with the serial killer had perfect knowledge of their intentions and history when that is very often not the case. And if you are going to pull the "women send serial killers letters" I'm going to respond those women are an extreme minority with mental illnesses which are causing them not to behave rationally. You can't define justice around the behaviors of a minority of irrat…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 09:40 PM
6

But ideally shouldn't we want to support both? I'm not saying we need to mandate monogamous pairings or anything like that, but if a portion of the population is feeling like romantic connection is out of their reach isn't it good to give them some help? Its gonna be down to them to make use of the resources but ideally we should try something.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 09:29 PM
3

I think it means a virgin who has never even held someones hand or had their first kiss. Basically someone with 0 romantic experience of any kind.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 09:27 PM
2

No one is entitled to feel safe ALL the time. If you drive drunk or put yourself in other bad situations you will (and should) feel unsafe. However, I think we all agree that a person who follows the rules of society and positively contributes should feel safe. We all want a safe society and to be protected from other people harming us. It gets trickier when it comes to self-harms. I personally believe that ideally we should have societal help structures to assist people who fall victim to self-…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 09:23 PM
1

I can understand only wanting sex with someone who loves you but why is marriage necessary? Do you think people can only be in love if they are married?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 05:11 PM
3

Plenty of modern women won't stay in a LTR past a certain amount of time (and definitely won't have kids) unless they get married. So the guy benefits by getting to continue the relationship and have kids by introducing marriage. Also the rate and consequences of divorce are overblown. The "women initiate 80% of divorces" stat is incorrect with the real number being between 60-70% depending on the study. Additionally, tons of other factors play into divorce rate, with the the divorce rate for fi…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/24 10:06 PM
1

"I can afford it very comfortably." That makes you an extreme minority.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/24 09:52 PM
2

Your logic is only correct if we assume most of the cheating happens through Ashley Madison, and that all the users of Ashley Madison actually used it to cheat (rather than just making accounts). I would also say Ashley Madison is not the best data source considering how many accounts are fake or inactive. Also only ~15% of the accounts are female so it doesn't really support the idea that "women cheat the second they get the chance". https://www.cbc.ca/news/science/ashley-madison-s-members-by-t…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/24 07:50 PM
16

"all women will cheat the second they get the chance" gives the same vibe as "all men will rape a woman the second they get a chance" There are plenty of people who pass what are the bare minimum standards of moral behavior (not cheating or raping). If cheating was so commonly desired there wouldn't be a massive taboo around it. An easy proof of this is that in other cultures where cheating is more common there is actually less of a taboo around it. https://www.statista.com/chart/3742/the-countr…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/24 05:25 PM
–

Thats why statistics are gathered using random sampling methods and not just putting out a poll on twitter. You really think the people who design these studies, whose job is to perform research, are not familiar with sampling bias?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 03:16 AM
–

Men have fewer friends than ever. Just read the OP, they provide the statistics. Also: From “The Male Loneliness Epidemic” from Western Oregon University: "For one, research conducted in 2021 found that 15% of men claim that they have no close friends, a staggering 12% increase since 1990. A study published by Equimundo in 2023 found that a majority of men, ranging from older Millennials to Generation Z, agree with the statement, “No one really knows me well,” with Generation Z having the highes…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 02:28 AM
–

Yes, having a romantic partner is extremely special and an experience friendship cannot replace. I never said that, my point is that friendship can prevent someone from feeling lonely. This post is about lonely men. For men who are lonely, making friends (or finding a partner) can help. If you want a relationship and all the special feelings that come with it, find a relationship. But if our goal as a society is to help men feel less lonely we need to encourage male friendships and community, no…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 11:13 PM
–

Friendships are more dependent on personality than relationships. Its rare to not be friends with someone for their looks, its very common for someone to be rejected as a romantic partner because of their looks. Personality matters for both, but friendships are more dependent on pure personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 11:09 PM
2

The people I am talking about don't want to settle down, they just want sex. To them "lonely" and "horny" mean the same thing. You seem like a different type of person. Still not clear which thing I said was "insane". Its true that some people don't want to admit friends are a good solution to loneliness because they really just want sex or they want to be able to blame their loneliness on their looks.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 05:37 PM
1

You are just wrong. When the "male loneliness epidemic" is discussed its framed as an issue of social isolation. Plenty of men are complaining about having no one to talk to, no community, etc. It hurts those men when you immediately jump to "find a romantic partner" when finding friends is arguably easier and would help them immensely. But yes, I agree that if someone is complaining about a desire for love then making friends probably won't help.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 04:37 PM
1

What is the "hole in your heart"? Sounds like you aren't describing loneliness, but the desire for love and romance. Thats okay, but the post is about lonely men and what to do about loneliness. Making friends is a great solution for loneliness. But obviously if the issue is lack of romance making friends won't help much with that. Edit: Im gonna add that the reason this is brought up is that lots of people don't even consider making friends as a solution. They jump to filling the "hole in their…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 04:32 PM
1

People on here have shitty reading comprehension. Its not "only find purpose outside of relationships and become a sexless monk" The point is to not only rely on relationships for purpose and have other things in your life you care about as well. Like friendships, hobbies, etc. But yeah, ideally you have it all. Friends, family romance, hobbies, a good job, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 04:27 PM
1

No one said anything about friends being "enough". I think everyone understands ideally you want friends AND a romantic partner. The point is that people who are totally alone and complaining about being lonely would be better served making friends vs only trying to find a romantic partner. But ideally you end up with both.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 04:23 PM
3

For some people it definitely will. If you are an early-mid 20s guy who never leaves home and plays video games all day getting some friends who you can do shit with will definitely help. There is still the desire for a relationship, but its much better than being totally alone. Of course its not gonna work for everyone, but neither does relationships. People get in shitty relationships where they are dying inside. However, if you are lonely its silly to assume making friends won't help.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 04:22 PM
2

So its a tricky problem because people generally need friends and a romantic partner to feel fulfilled. So really there are two types of loneliness, total solitude (no/few friends and no partner) and lovesickness (no romantic partner). When people use the phrase "male loneliness epidemic" its kind of using those two types interchangeably. Most people are referring to total solitude but there are some who are referring to lovesickness. A lot of common complaints I see are about literally being al…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 04:18 PM
1

why not? Does having friends not make someone less lonely?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 04:04 PM
0

You can also be in a relationship and be lonely. If you have no friends or romantic partner its kinda silly to say "well only a romantic partner can solve my loneliness". Making friends probably could to but lots of people don't want to admit that. The reasons: Making friends is more dependent on personality (compared to finding a relationship) and people don't want to admit their personalities need work They are actually just pursuing women because they want sex so need to hide it by saying "oo…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 04:03 PM
1

How much the red flag was him being insecure about his social situation (being upset and faking emergencies, etc) vs not having many friends? Faking emergencies is obviously unhinged but is just not having a big social circle also an ick nowadays?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 03:54 PM
–

Its totally stupid to look at population-wide statistics (45% divorce rate overall) to make life decisions. More than 50% of men become obese, does that mean I have a 50% chance to become obese? No, it depends on my personal lifestyle and choices. Same with divorce, compare yourself to others who follow the same lifestyle, not the general population. For my demographic, (white, wealthy family, college + masters educated, first marriage, household income over 200k) the divorce rate is very low.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 03:51 PM
1

if you are meeting girls off apps you can assume they are texting multiple guys at the same time. Thats why its good to be able to send personal and interesting texts. Sometimes people overload the intimacy because they feel they need to compensate for being "boring". Then they just seem like a clingy loser. Talk about your life, what interests you, and try to make it engaging or at least funny. Its very hard to master though and takes time. Its all trial and error in how to text as well as find…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 03:32 AM
3

So far what you have described is not "lovey dovey". It seems like she is really interested in you but be careful not to get ahead of yourself. Theres nothing wrong with seeming enthusiastic, you want to nurture and reinforce positivity. Think of the message it would send if you suddenly went distant the second she showed interest. The issue is guys will use relentless positivity as the solution to every relationship problem when there are times its better to pull away. But you should generally …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 02:39 AM
2

I don't think anyone should lovebomb within the first few weeks of meeting someone. Just being genuinely interested in them while also projecting clear boundaries and making it obvious you have a life is good enough. Guys fuck up at this super early stage by texting nonstop or being extremely intimate. This makes it seem like you have no life and comes across as very clingy. Past that, it depends on how you want to sell yourself. Think about what works for your personality type, livestyle, type …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 02:25 AM
–

thats a mean thing to say 😢
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/24 04:20 PM
–

My point is very often people don't get what they "demand". Accidents happen or they settle out of necessity.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/24 03:44 PM
–

why then, do poor men (and women) have the most kids?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/24 03:20 PM
–

This is extremely important, I don't think it neatly breaks down to 80/20 but it definitely hurts the ability of men to date when they are surrounded by women who earn more (and thus don't see them as a prospect for dating). However, a point of nuance is that people tend to live around those who are a similar socioeconomic status. Wealthy men tend to live around women from wealthier families and vice versa. This can create problems in areas like silicon valley, where the average salary is so hig…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/24 03:00 PM
5

There are plenty of desperate losers on the internet (men and women). The sexual strategy desperate losers is to try and pull you down to their level with threats or insults ("you are too old", "no man will want you", "ugly men are worthless", etc). If your own self-worth is lower it makes you easier to manipulate and control. You feel you are not deserving of better so you settle for the subpar treatment that the loser provides. In my experience a lot of these loser people in toxic internet spa…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/24 04:11 PM
2

This is a good read. The internet conditions us to see most of the population as "losers" so to US of course the women are settling. However, we know nothing about their relationship. Its just layers of assumptions built from media conditioning.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/24 11:11 PM
1

This post seems to imply an extremely toxic and blackpilled logic that any "below average" person, whether male or female, can never find anyone who considers them attractive. Its just untrue. But keep in mind by "attractive" I don't mean "first choice" or "the most attractive".
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/24 11:08 PM
3

Be extremely careful when interpreting stories about "people who are married but only have sex once a month or less". Keep in mind these people have been in a relationship for 10+ years in many cases. The first 5-8 years could have been filled with constant sex for all you know. What we do know from studying relationships is that sexual activity between partners peaks within the first few years on average. However, over time novelty wears off and sexual desire wanes from one or both partners. Th…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/24 11:06 PM
2

Sex is fun. However, relationships are more emotionally fulfilling and the sex is actually better. The feeling of falling in love with someone is also 1000x better than sex. There can be a lot of drama in relationships though, and I understand if someone doesn't want to pursue one. In many ways its a lot easier to have purely sexual relationships where you don't have to focus on creating and maintaining an emotional connection.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/24 10:38 PM
1

I was responding to someone who said hot guys are screwing 100 women a year and fucking up the dating market. Thats obviously not true and cheating isn't an explanation either. Basically no one is fucking 100 people a year.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 05:42 PM
1

Cheating 100 times in a year is kinda crazy, no? Like so crazy it never happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 01:52 PM
9

There is no evidence for the claim OP is making. There isn't even evidence tons of women are sleeping with "chads" in the first place. Then you would have to prove those women have higher standards because of it. I'd argue the feeling from men that women have higher standards has nothing to do with "chad" and everything to do with changing social and economic dynamics.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 04:36 AM
4

Or maybe he is in a relationship with a hot woman. I don't know why you guys assume every successful dude is fucking as many women as he physically can. Also basically no one has 100 sexual partners a year. Its not even 1/100, its statistically insignificant, literally an extreme outlier.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 04:28 AM
3

Its not reality, there is no evidence for this. People generally settle down with people around their level of looks, education, and economic status. There is no evidence that a large proportion of women have extensive sexual histories with attractive men prior to this, its a fantasy caused by insecurity and watching too much youtube.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 04:18 AM
–

I agree. Feelings aren't always logical.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/24 04:14 PM
5

Hooking up is rare and only done within 20% of the population of men and women. "Most people are sexually active (and the GSS also shows that most sex occurs within committed relationships, see: How Many Sexual Partners Did Men and Women Have in 2022?). Additionally, a similar percentage of men and women are sexually inactive. This leaves the remaining 20% in a mating pool with one another. An additional percentage (perhaps 6-10% based on the distribution above) may accumulate an additional annu…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/24 01:22 PM
–

When women frequently go on dates with men they feel are "mediocre" or inferior it affects their self-esteem. They feel "why am I not attracting better men" stuff like that. Going on dates with men they don't like is a constant reminder they can't do better.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/24 01:19 PM
–

Do you think being trans is just an issue of personal preference?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/24 01:16 PM
–

Dating apps are 3:1 men/women at minimum which skews match rates. But lets actually look at the results of dating apps. Berkeren et al. (2022): "This was a longitudinal study of 1.3M college students following the Tinder rollout. Greek fraternity members (perhaps where you might find the “Chads”) saw a 6% increase in total sexual partners. Further, STDs (a good measure of sexual activity in a population that does not rely on self reports) only increased by 0.2%. The top 25% of men saw an increas…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/24 01:09 PM
–

Social media attention doesn't select for "truth" it selects for excitability. Things that get popular are things that trigger strong feelings in people (generally negative feelings too). Oftentimes the truth doesn't do that. The people posting those videos are selecting the most excitable answers to post. They often tell the people being interviewed what to say as well. It is not an honest forum or empirical discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/24 12:44 PM
1

you are wrong. Most people (even in their early 20s) are consistently looking for long-term relationships. Its not true that young women "spend their 20s partying and being ran through" and its not true that young men "spend their 20s being a fuckboy and avoiding commitment".
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/24 12:47 PM
1

What about attraction that takes ~2 months to be built (which is the average). Does that count as a beta relationship too?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/24 12:42 PM
0

Most "nice guy" behaviors actually come from fear, not kindness. They lack a spine and say whatever to please the woman because they are deathly afraid of rejection and afraid to assert themselves. This fear of rejection usually comes from the fact they are losers which also heavily affects their dating success. If you gain confidence in yourself and stop pedestalizing the women you interact with you will see that your natural personality will start shining through. Things like planning dates or…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/24 01:30 PM
2

Yes for basic looksmaxxing (getting to less than 20% bf, good haircut/style, clean skin) However, having some basic flirting skill, knowing what questions to ask on a date, and knowing the basic icks (what girls hate) also goes a long way. Having a social circle is also a huge benefit because it provides tons of warm approaches with women and your female friends can literally set you up. So I'd say looks are more like 40-80% of the problem depending on where the guy started.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/24 01:21 PM
–

Both men and women are free to avoid relationships if they feel its not worth it. The issue right now is it seems like more women are taking that option than men, indicating that currently relationships have more value to men than women. 50% of single men are looking for a relationship compared to 35% of women. https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/02/08/for-valentines-day-5-facts-about-single-americans/ In terms of why people are single 56% of women say its because they can't find someon…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 08:45 PM
–

Mens approaches towards women aren't distributed on a bell curve. It would look more like an exponential function where as the woman gets more attractive the number of times she gets approached dramatically increases.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 08:34 PM
8

I think a lot of the surface-level advice in the redpill is very useful (especially the gym/style combo). I was doing that stuff already but here is some PUA/redpill coach advice that helped me with dating: Never chase anyone or try to force feelings. This was a big problem for me initially, it was such a relief when I realized the right move was to instantly move on when I felt my effort wasn't reciprocated. Dating is about effectively selling yourself, not about being as honest as possible. Un…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/24 03:25 PM
5

Rejections hurt my self esteem before I had any experience. Being a kissless virgin and being rejected is much more painful because you think there might be no one out there who will give you a chance. Now that I have experience I see it more like filtering down to someone who I match with. Obviously I don't expect every woman to want to date me, but at least now I know there are some people willing to give me a shot.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/24 03:18 PM
1

I know
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/24 01:51 AM
1

If you check my comment history you will see I am aware of the 10% figure. I also never said anything about alimony being unjustified, just that it was a way the state forces people to labor even after the relationship is over.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/24 01:51 AM
1

in my experience people complain more about losing assets (house, car, etc) and paying alimony than child support. However, alimony is only awarded in 10 percent of divorces so its not a super common thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/24 07:51 PM
1

why shouldn't most men have children?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/24 07:49 PM
0

His point is that the government does force men to labor for women after the relationship is over in the form of alimony. His point is that withdrawing yourself from a relationship should end all commitments to that relationship, including financial ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/24 07:47 PM
4

As someone develops their career, finds their personal sense of style, and works out to get a good physique for their body type they naturally will fall into some sort of niche. A burly, bearded construction contractor who wears flannels and workboots would attract different women than a lean PA who wears sweaters and converse outside of work. The main point is that its useless to pretend that your lifestyle and image appeals to everyone, your choices will naturally end up making you more attrac…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/24 12:24 AM
3

And yet you can't find a single study or survey that says 90% of men are single. I mean "60% of young men are invisible to women" still sounds pretty bad, why not go with that?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/24 03:49 AM
7

If you got married you aren't invisible to women. I agree there is tons of inequality in the dating market, thats not the same as saying 90% of men have no chance and will never be considered by any woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/24 03:47 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter