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Beautiful-Ice-9172 Archive

View 2 posts and 70 comments by Beautiful-Ice-9172 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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13

This is you're red flag. If her ex was a narcissist, likely she is projecting and that's your sign to hit the exit. Unless you just want sex. It's probably easy to get by agreeing with her and being an ass. That's your sign this is not a quality woman. Truth is a true narc would have her terrified to say bad things about him. Cluster B afflicted people wreck your life if allowed. Almost as bad as a divorce. If all of her ex's were narcs, she is oblivious to her own harmful actions. No accountabi…
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/25 08:57 PM
7

You cashed out your 401k to fix the home? I would say that makes the home a joint ownership or at the least reimbursement of the funds used to repair the home. You need an attorney. I am in Maryland. But I doubt spousal support for life is automatically granted. Also about your son, ask the lawyer about parental alienation. Parents can get in hot water with the courts for poisoning a child against the other parent. Start a journal, dates and time stamps. You might think you remember things, but …
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/25 05:13 AM
2

I disagree. Waiting to talk isn't the same as lying. He is going to have the talk, just not before the holidays. Ever had to fire someone? Sometimes you wait. You know they have something going on and you don't want to put them over the edge. But you do fire them. I see this as similar. A delay with a purpose of having one last good family get together. That's not evil or dishonest. He has told her for three years. He has been honest. He made a decision and should be able to decide the time tabl…
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/25 06:19 PM
2

No, that will likely ruin the holidays. The whole point in waiting would be moot. You will have to fake it till you are ready. You will only introduce stress without relief if you drop it early. Why go through all that. Wait till you are ready to act. She may not agree about waiting also. Women are emotional beings. News like this will very likely cause her to emote. Do you want to have 200. Conversations about why till the holidays? That's the best outcome here. I get your decision to wait. Let…
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/25 06:11 PM
14

Honestly, yeah. Men will date the worst women. Single moms should be a no go. But so many men jump right in someone else's save game. Your husband/STBX sounds like a jerk. I have no love for cheaters. Thing is you married him, had kids with him. You have some internal work to do. Why did you marry and have kids with such a low quality man? I can't answer that, but you should before you get back out there. Not judging at all when I say that. My ex cheated on me. I did some self reflecting to figu…
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/25 04:26 AM
5

She left though. Abandoned the mirage and the home. Yes likely need to talk to a lawyer, but it's not like she comes home and he locked her out. She left was living else where.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 01:51 PM
3

Take a deep breath man. It's a hard road. You will come out stronger. But, strength comes with pain. Figure out who you are now. Likely you aren't the same guy you were when you got married. I was 22 when I got married. 40 when we filed. My first thought was to hit some bars. Then I thought, yeah, be the old creepy guy in the club. Looser. You need to figure out who you are without her. That's best done without weed, alcohol, and without jumping back into a relationship. Gyms, home gyms are chea…
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 12:21 PM
8

Change the locks. Find hard documentation she moved out. If she damages property or hits you document it. If she was dumb enough to send you her lawyer told her to do this, save that. If not try to get it in text. Sms, so you want to move in because your lawyer said live her 12 hrs a day? Not sure I am cool will that. Let her text you a book and get a lawyer if you don't have one.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 03:26 AM
10

By the time you hear she wants out, she has been thinking about it for a while. Maybe years. It's not likely you get her back. I am sorry. There is a narrative deeply entrenched in her mind. Look, all you can ever do is work on yourself. With or without her. You can't make her change. But you can change and make your life better. Maybe figure out what went wrong and fix your end of that. Make yourself healthier. The gym helps with the stress that comes from divorce. And man, it's a lot of stress…
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 03:20 AM
2

There are a lot of variables there. Depends on the county, judge, your ex. I wouldn't do it without talking to a lawyer. Men have fled the country for losing their job and judges still required the same support. Quitting, I would GUESS would not go over well. You need a lawyer to let you know. I was laid off during my own cs stint. I was able to pause support. I had to pay with back pay over time to catch up.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 03:07 AM
3

Alimony, just so you know can always be extended. Not saying she would do that. But she can go back and ask for more time. Child support has a sunset. Some guys pay more in child support to not pay alimony. Some give more of their retirement. But you should know alimony can be a question mark on your future. Also, get a lawyer. It's not contentious until it is. The lawyer can say and do things you cannot. What is your peace of mind worth?
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/25 05:44 PM
1

Damn, I should watch that. I was 40 before I started learning all this. I am now 50. No one taught me all this. My father has had two divorces, trying to wife up a third woman. He didn't know, but naturally did a bit of this stuff. I saw it work. Discovered evo pschy, some MGTOW, redpill stuff. Some pua stuff. There is a lot of male ego B's there, but there is some truth too. If you change for her, she will hate you. Women like men, and men are strong and stubborn. The man is a big rock in the o…
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/25 12:25 PM
6

The human mind really isn't built for the social media trash. Hearing things used to be something that happened very locally and organically. Algorithms and the fact outlandish things trend more than normalcy does affect how people think and act. It has been devastating for teen girls. Facebook has done social experiments on people and they have swayed public opinions. So there is your red flag. A date hooked into social media is a big red flag. Their opinion will likely sway with the algorithm.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/25 03:47 AM
4

Glad to hear man. This is not easy. Bank those wins for when life is kicking you. It helped me get through. I am happy you guys bonded and had a great time. That's great stuff.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/25 03:42 AM
6

You aren't alone bro. Many if not most men put it off. Women file most divorces. We just keep trying and trying. But if I may, you can't fix a relationship on one side. When there is a break down, there is typically plenty of work to go around to fix things. You say you have done things, has she? I have some suggestions. 1.) Stop being the man she wants. You can only be you bro. You can be the man she wants for so long, but eventually you gotta be you. If that ends the marriage, well you never h…
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/25 03:38 AM
6

Even if she was the worst wife ever, (and she would have stiff completion from my ex for the title)... Your mind is used to her being around. The human mind likes patterns. Right now you are building new connections in your brain. While that happens, the mind is like what... Nah go back to the way it was. Get used to this feeling. Progress never comes sticking to what we know. Ok, the hard part. You need to get a life outside your kids bro. They are safe and they are great. But you're an adult a…
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/25 08:35 PM
1

Lawyers often do free consults. Chat gpt might be better than guessing.. good luck bro.
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/25 08:22 PM
1

In my state, you can not waive child support. You can't even sign it away. When you file for divorce it's a math formula and it's automatic. If you provide healthcare, there is a discount, and it's always negotiable to lower or raise it.
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/25 05:23 PM
2

If she isn't working when you file, ask to attribute at least minimum wage to her. Any job can make at least that. Her choosing not to work shouldn't count against you. Hang in there. I would be lying if I told you this was easy. It's not. But it is worth it if it's gone bad. Work each day to make yourself a better man. More income, better health. Better father. Work towards making enough it doesn't matter what you are paying her. When stressed, run, do push ups squats. It helps reduce stress.
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/25 03:33 AM
1

Let her be her. You can not control what she does now. What she is doing is being selfish. But you can not fix it. She can date 200 men at the same time if she wants. There isn't anything you can do about it. Understand I understand your concerns. I am trying to keep you out of trouble. In time if she is what it sounds like to me, the kids will pull away from her. Whether or not they are drawn to you is entirely up to you. You need to make sure you show the the right way. Only introduce a woman …
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/25 03:07 AM
5

Hey man. I realize I am not you. But... My wife and I split when I was 26. She was off the rails. Smoked weed, I had a clearance I needed to keep for work. She had affairs. We had a 3 year old daughter. She decided she was gay. Left to be with a girl, who said you left to be with me, no thanks. She dated. I dated. In my state you need to be separated a year to get a divorce. Separated and on the record. I was just coming out of my funk from it all. The 1 year mark was approaching. I was making 6…
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/25 02:50 AM
3

I mean, if you didn't pay the taxes, the house isn't an issue. Quit fighting for what you hate. In a divorce what you made will be used against you. Quit working 70 to 80 hrs. Quit bailing her out. Start focusing on what you want. You say you were forced to live here, but you are allowing her to lead you around. No paper work is filed yet. You can optimize your life to better outcomes if/when it is filed. The home will go with her in a divorce. Why are you paying for it if you hate it? What did …
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/25 03:15 PM
5

Can you get CBD oil where you live? Won't get you high. It helped me with panic attacks about this same stuff. I could go through a day without them then. Excersisze. Exercising has been proven to reduce stress. You get a side benifit of getting healthier. Lift weights, run, body weight excersisze. Will cut your stress in half at least. You are not weak bro. You are starting one of the most stressful things a man can go through. It's ok though. If I can make it through, you can too. My unsolicit…
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/25 03:06 PM
18

It's tough. I get it. Listen to me. This is likely to blow up. You shouldn't rush out and date in the middle of a divorce. Almost guaranteed to fail. You can not control her. My ex flew through boyfriends. Each one was "different this time". None were. My daughters actually asked her to stop bringing men around because they weren't going to be around long. Each one at the end was an abusive alcoholic ass hole per her. Lawyers told me there was nothing I could do. I had to focus on my life. My re…
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/25 02:54 PM
1

What I look for is connections. Who they know, golf with etc. most lawyer do not like divorce cases. They are ugly and sort of bottom rung work. When you go to a firm make it known you do not want to be pawned off to the new guys. You want the older experienced lawyer that knows the judge personally. Knew them before they became a judge. Maybe look at the law firm a judge used to work for. Gender doesn't mean a whole lot. Age I think is more important. Better is who they know. Keep in mind talen…
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/25 09:58 PM
1

I don't know your situation. But I think given what I know, I would just liquidate and split the money. Sounds like she just wants to drag it out. Or maybe the lawyers do. Or both. Or I am wrong. But if you want out, ask to split everything 50/50 after it's sold. You lawyer likely knows or knows if her lawyer. These people work with and against each other all the time. Ask yours if he can get a read on if she is just dragging it out. If so, what is the way forward. Can you force a equitable spli…
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 02:02 PM
2

The more you two can agree on the better. The more you go back and forth on lawyers, the less she gets, the more you spend. Try telling her exactly that. If she wants to fight... Ask the court to liquidate everything and split it, no alimony, no child support. Nothing to fight over. Her lawyer, or your own, rack up fees the more you fight. So one might be storing the pot. They benefit when it goes ugly. Keep that in mind. I would be firm but kind. Call her up. Got a minute? Look the more we go b…
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 12:40 PM
16

Who cares what they say. Don't bother explaining it. Unless you live it, you can't understand it. Hell men hear it and still tie the knot everyday. All you can do is live your life. Unless they pay your bills you can ignore them. As far as dating, as long as you are up front, honest... They can want more all they want. You have no obligation to give more than you are comfortable with. As more men make the choice to not marry I think the shaming and projection will increase. Instead of talking wi…
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/25 04:07 PM
7

Good luck. Yeah it sucks to see it.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/25 03:54 PM
1

It took some time, but things are better than when I was married. But I will be honest here. It didn't happen overnight and I wouldn't say it was easy. Divorce sucks. On so many levels it's awful. But it does shatter the ego enough, you can rebuild into the man you want to be through the process.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/25 10:20 PM
7

The field is riddled with the highest concentrations of mental illness you will ever find. It's also filled with man hating feminists. I would say even half of the men. Some men are ok. But older female therapist, most see women as victims and men as offenders. Very happy to push your wife to leave. But if a bunch of her friends are getting divorced, your chances of divorce go up quite a bit. The talks of it's so nice to whatever seem to be infectious. Never mind most of it is them trying to con…
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/25 06:23 PM
4

Maybe the therapist was bad, maybe friends are in her ear. Maybe there is another on the side. It doesn't matter man. She is pulling away. You can't negotiate attraction or love. All you have control over is yourself. She is pulling away. Women don't like to be the bad guy. So she runs hot and cold. You have a choice to make. Chase her and throw your self respect away. Or see what's happening and start to detach. I know that's harsh. I know it hurts. I have been there. But you can keep trying to…
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/25 04:28 PM
0

You just might find free counseling. I get it man, just now crawling out of robbing Peter to pay Paul. Sucks I get it. But know this, she can accuse all she wants. She needs to prove it. And it looks bad to accuse right after she is. I won't lie, custody fights are expensive. I wish I could help more man. The pendulum is starting to swing back I think. But it's still pretty nuts out there for men.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 02:21 AM
2

What's your custody arrangement? I would get them in counseling. If she interferes go to court. They love therapists. Explain the kids have said things to you that are upsetting and you feel they need a place to deal with it. You might be able to build a case and get them out of there if you are willing to work for it. Let me say, brother I am sorry. I know it sucks. My ex smoked weed with my daughter at 12 years old. Brought tons of "boy friends" in and out of their home with her. It Yanks your…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 01:50 AM
1

Depending on where you are, you might have a decent case to get full custody man. In Maryland a year of no sex is grounds for a divorce,the rehab and mental issues is not good for kids. But you need a paper trail. And paperwork on facilities, therapists, not doing the work. Get it all together in a safety deposit box or in a desk at work. Once all together take it to a lawyer and see what they say.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 01:45 AM
2

Expect her to flip her lid. If you can, have witnesses when she gets home, be there. Ge cync cameras are about $99 and $20 a month for online storage. Set some up in the common areas and take any convo there. DO NOT TOUCH HER. DO NOT TOUCH HER. if she touches you call the cops. Women quite often throw false assault charges around in divorces. Any element of truth can destroy you. Film her if she comes unhinged and on camera say I am filing this. You can argue then I told her clearly, you can hea…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 01:40 AM
6

3k a month is steep. Get all your bills together, pay stubs, bills to her. Add it all up. If you can not make ends meet file for a change. Turn it all in. Have your lawyer ask how it's possible. If you can barely make ends meet, maybe try to get a better job if you can. Don't count on mediators being helpful. I had one blow up an agreement we had. He said she can get so much more. Asked her why did you agree to this. We were set to sign. Not after his dumb ass. In the end she got even less. Chat…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 01:29 AM
10

Just file man. You can't wait on I don't know what I want. And honestly, do you want to be married to someone who isn't sure she wants to be married to you. Let her think whatever she wants. She needs it to be your fault. I don't know why, but it's universal. Think of it as an exit fee. Fine all my fault, now let's move on. Years from now she will still be talking about it being your fault. Only, you won't be there to hear it. Keep improving yourself. That's the great work and honestly, good on …
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 01:21 AM
3

Brother, you aren't alone. I was 40 and started my divorce. I turn 50 in Feb. I was first shocked by how quite my home was. But, hmmm... I got used to it. More than that, I grew to love the peace and quite. Women tried to set me up a lot back then. I declined. I wanted to enjoy my quite. I figured I would get over it. I haven't. I know why something broke now. I broke it. I know how much money I have because it's just me. My groceries are cheap. Electric is half what it was. I don't need much ho…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 01:14 AM
18

1.) dating sites are trash man. Absolute trash. A woman's inbox remains full in there. Half don't even want to date, they want attention/validation when they are fighting with their man. Or, they want free vacations and meals. Seriously stay off dating apps unless you want the worst kind of women you can find. 2.). Finish the divorce before you date bro. You need to take out the trash before you throw another party. Your life is up in the air in a divorce. That doesn't make for the best foundati…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 01:07 AM
2

Yeah, be careful. Kids want to please you. They will say things they think you want to hear. Or play on your sympathy to get what they want. Not saying your kid did. Just that it happens. My kids told me and my ex sort of true things and exaggerated to make them worse. Sometimes much worse. You get caught up in it easily. But take it with a grain of salt. Trust but verify. Thing is she hurt you. So a part of you wants to believe it. It fits your narrative. Not saying it's not true. About half wh…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 12:56 AM
3

I hope you read this. If this is how you start your divorce. If you let this slide, it will get worse. Since she is so emotionally disregarded as you say, the divorce will put her further over the edge at times. Divorces are emotionally awful. Whatever had her upset, worse is coming and you are telling her you will allow it. How do you feel about her hitting your kids? I let an incident slide in my divorce. She punched out my tail light. My daughter was there. Cop encouraged me not to press char…
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/25 12:00 PM
3

He has the order already. Hell he doesn't even need a lawyer. Here is what you said your honor, here is what she did. Done... Credit is easy, challenge the debt. The creditor has 30 days to prove it's legit. If not it falls off your credit report. Done. You have an order, it's not a legit debt.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/25 01:44 PM
2

This is terrible advice. He has a court order. He can likely use to deflect bad credit rating. He can certainly compel her in court to adhere to the order. Maybe liquidate the home and get some money for her not following the order. Why get the order if you're just going to let the opposing side do what they want.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/25 01:09 PM
3

You have a court order. Stick to it. She can want the world, it doesn't mean she gets it. When she is trying to twist it simply say " the order says XYZ". XYZ being whatever it says. If she continues again say the order says XYZ. Over and over. At 90 days drag her into court and nail her for not complying.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/25 01:06 PM
8

You need to understand, some women will purposely drive you to anger to get you to do what you did. Then, they can ask for anything in court. You are the abusive ex. Once this gets documented, she can say you beat her all the time. Gas light the kids that you beat them. It looks credible. There is a documented case now. Not saying you did. But to a vindictive ex, this was a gift. Had a lawyer tell me false accusations of DV are insane. Most easily disproven. When you did what you did, you fell f…
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/25 02:28 AM
8

Bro... This can be used to get a protective order keeping you from the kids and her. You can get jail. It can be used in a divorce trial and haunt you for years. This was maybe the biggest mistake of your life. You need a lawyer if you ever needed one. In the eyes of a court, you went in her home uninvited, assaulted her, beat up her guest and are asking for time with the kids. You look unhinged. Not saying you are, but you need to know the optics. A lawyer can help a lot here. A background chec…
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/25 06:02 PM
1

I am so much better after divorce. I waited too long. My life has continued to improve, financially, relationships with my kids and gf (never marrying again). She sits at home smoking weed all day like a teen. I get out, do things lift, walk, date. I never felt so alone as when I was in the marriage. Dead bedroom Cheating Stole money and hid it Didn't pay bills Hid drugs in the house (my job had a clearance) Once called the cops saying she was scared of me because I was leaving during a argument…
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/25 05:50 PM
15

Enjoy your time with your kids. Very likely she ends up breaking up with a bunch of flings. This guy has money and that's great for him. Spend time with your kids man, many guys don't get that. Encourage her to go on more trips and get closer with your kids. Trust me when I say, the grass isn't as green over there as it seems. Focus on making yourself and your life what you want. She is his problem now. Take the kids to an amusement park, a pool, build forts with them. Buy some plastic from home…
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/25 05:38 PM
4

It's tongue in cheek, but honestly, not bad. Actually quite a bit of thought in his videos.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/25 05:25 PM
1

Some guys get lucky. The courts are slowly shifting. But there are many judges, negotiators (lawyers that help hammer out a deal), and shrinks still holding on to the tender years doctrine. Some are just bitter man haters. Wear a smile, but have your guard up.
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/25 02:14 PM
1

Yeah I know man. I made the post. It gets better man. Hang in there. Hope it helps https://www.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/s/awuIlezYWr
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/25 12:03 PM
1

Oh you sweet summer child. It will never happen. Nothing will change. This will get buried or discredited and called hateful.
/r/MensRights15/07/25 12:55 AM
1

Hope it gives you something useful. Hang in there.
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/25 04:11 AM
1

Talk to a lawyer. Leaving can be considered abandoning the relationship and kids if you have them. Many a guy ends up paying dearly for this move. It varys state to state and even then judge to judge. That's why you need to speak with a lawyer. Leaving can screw you over bad.
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/25 01:33 AM
5

I would put good money down on a bet this leads to pain and regret if he goes for it. There are 8 billion people in the world. 4 billion women. Cut bait and move on bro. I feel your pain, but this is not going to end well.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 03:07 PM
5

This. 100% this. Unless he wants another emotional roller coaster block her.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 03:05 PM
3

I made my first post in here on advice last night. It focused on me to health and kids. You aren't alone bro. Hell, half of all marriages end up in this boat. Hang in there.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 03:02 PM
4

It's a long road. But I made it. There were times I thought I wouldn't. Hang in there.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 02:07 PM
2

Thank you. It's a tough road. However it's doable. I wish I knew a few of these things at the start. But I hope this helps some not make some of my mistakes.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 01:11 PM
5

Sounds like she didn't get over the divorce. My ex is very much still holding on to it. When my kids didn't want to see her, I encouraged them to anyways. I told them, you only have one mother. That means something. When she tried to go for full custody, this saved my ass. They had a shrink meet with the kids and they found I went out of my way to encourage time with mom even when the kids didn't want to. They had heard me say it so much, they bitched about it to the shrink, who thought wow, tha…
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 01:10 PM
3

Yeah get out of your head as much as you can. It will be too easy to sit and obsess over the bad and what could be.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 01:01 PM
4

No, I read some. My situation was I had a awful narcissist mother and went out and found her in a wife. WTF. So I had to kill the part of me that wanted that drama. That sought out what I was familiar with. For me, "Stop walking on egg shells" helped a lot. It's about BPD, but it worked for my needs. I found some helpful knowledge from the MGTOW community if you can believe it. Not a woman hater. Those guys can be misogynists, so be careful what you consume there. But being alone when not used t…
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 01:00 PM
3

Made my first post of advice in here last night. I hope it helps. The first one is about mental health and the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 12:38 PM
2

Hope it helps.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 05:10 AM
3

Lol, I assure you they were hard earned. Keep your chin up and boots on. Focus on making yours and your kids life as positive as possible and it will work out.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 05:01 AM
1

No problem. Glad you find it useful.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 04:59 AM
1

Thank for that. Hope it offers a few gems.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 04:59 AM
3

Glad you find it helpful. Remember keep your head and prioritize things. The rest is noise. Drama is noise. 3 weeks is pretty fresh. Find things each day to be greatful for. Try to get a positive head space man. Good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 04:58 AM
1

This is one of those things women do that is disrespectful. I know men have their issues too. But she asked. Many women (not all?) Try to change their men. He would be perfect if... This can get out of control and seems to me like you don't like the guy. You are trying to make a guy into a guy you think you will like. Typically won't like him. You can invite him to the gym. But if he declines it might not be his thing. You can accept that or move on. You cannot change people. To think you can is…
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/24 02:09 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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