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BroScrubYourBalls Archive

View 2 posts and 47 comments by BroScrubYourBalls on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
141

Building PowerBroScrubYourBalls/r/TheRedPill23/07/20 01:37 AM
17

BroScrubYourBalls/r/Divorce_Men18/05/20 01:25 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
6

Your results may vary, but I found at 32, middle aged women seemed to be hot to trot as you are in separation and post divorce. Regardless of whether you're in a no-fault state or not, just be careful how you approach it. You don't want a little poon tang costing you more money on the backend, especially given what it already costs up front. Lawyers and angry spouses will use anything at their disposal to justify their actions in seeking more money from you, deferring things, etc.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/21 07:58 PM
1

All good man! Being a victim gets empathy and it gets attention and it can be a vicious cycle of depression fueled by itself, so I respect your position and I think we're on the same page when it really boils down to it.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/21 03:36 PM
1

Why is that? It's not like you stop going on vacations or doing things together with your kids after divorce. The scale of what you do may change due to financial obligations. Instead of going to a cabin on the lake, maybe you go camping instead. I get that's the masculine thing to do; I'm just tired of men having to justify the imbalance that often results in time/money with "making the best of it" and I think this mindset of "what's stopping you" doesn't take into consideration that there can …
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/21 02:28 PM
2

I tend to agree with you, but it's a little bit disingenuous to suggest there's nothing preventing him to take his kids on vacation like that. I'd agree there is value in new rituals and that it's important to not wallow in self-pity, but divorce grief is a process and I think this is a validated frustration because there are things in the short term that can prevent a guy going through a divorce from being able to take those same vacations. 1.) I have my kids 6 out of 14 overnights, but because…
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/21 12:36 PM
12

Good on you, man! The future is bright for you and it speaks to your self love that you're going to love yourself enough to leave that situation. You deserve better. As far as finances, I'll say this. I was devestated to give up half of what I was mostly attributed to saving, but despite that I am in a better financial position today without her and while paying child support. Turns out, when you're making bank and don't have a financial and disprespectful leach holding you back, you can do some…
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/21 02:46 AM
1

It was an advanced refundable tax credit, so you'll potentially both get the money because when you fill out your taxes you will claim the dependents but also claim that you didn't get the stimulus refund. Similar situations will happen for people who gave birth last year but filed 0 dependents in the prior tax year. At least, that's the way I understand it. Don't take it as fact, but don't write it off entirely. Research advanced refundable tax credits and you'll see how they can be paid retroa…
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/20 07:56 PM
1

Of course they do. What do you think self improvement involves? Improving my looks, money, status, experiences. I also date in a metro area of Des Moines and Cedar Rapids.
/r/TheRedPill08/08/20 02:57 PM
2

I'd say I have average looks, but I was successful with it because I wasn't a thug. I'm self aware I am genuinely kind, but being assertive doesn't require someone to sacrifice kindness. Interestingly, when I got divorced, a lot of women actually hit me up because its a small town and I was fresh meat. The affair was all over town in gossip, so I had some "popularity" in that regard. That in and of itself didn't spark anything, but I was able to start spinning plates amidst the attention while a…
/r/TheRedPill08/08/20 05:14 AM
5

This will be the break that makes you better. It takes a long fucking time, but if you can repurpose your hurt you will be a happier, more confident person. Find solace in living the life you want without consent.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/20 11:12 PM
5

I think that was a fair question. We're all here to improve and learn. Not OP, but I'll give my input. First and foremost, and this might go against the grain, but for me tailoring my looks to be masculine wasn't about trying to fit some sort of stereotype. I'm not trying to emulate some ideal persona of what being a man is. Your best version of being a man is going to be different than my best version. I don't think this is saying that if you fit some blue collar version of masculinity you shou…
/r/TheRedPill29/07/20 11:23 PM
6

To comment on the power struggle, I've came to two conclusions on the way that plays out. Attractive people are going to be attracted to other attractive people; however, I do agree there is a power struggle in the long run. In some cases, what I believe happens is that the woman (insecure despite her looks) will attempt to devalue the man by changing the way he dresses, how often he exercises, how he is fed, how he cuts his hair, and what he drives under the guise of "becoming a family man". Th…
/r/TheRedPill29/07/20 06:59 PM
45

I don't know man. I get what you're saying in some ways, but in other ways I've found the opposite to be true for me. I'd agree attractive women are rarely approached and having the confidence to do so is a game changer, especially for guys that underestimate their looks. That was me. For a lot of years I had body dysmorphia in the sense I "glowed" up but always assumed I was less than average until I started to date as an adult post divorce. I also agree attractive women don't compliment much, …
/r/TheRedPill29/07/20 06:14 PM
1

I'm in agreement with you. Took me awhile to get up to speed though. My post is my coming up to speed story. And with every new sexual encounter I have I start to become more aware of it.
/r/TheRedPill24/07/20 10:33 PM
9

"Ugly" guys have options, too - for lack of a better word. The hard pill to swallow is that they need to come to terms that they need to punch within their weight class. Often what less than average attractive guys do is make "can't get a woman" synonymous with "can't get an attractive/fit/sexy/hot woman". I date conventionally attractive women and know I'm conventionally attractive, but that wasn't always the case. There was a time I was 70% covered in Psoriasis, didn't lift weights, and had a …
/r/TheRedPill24/07/20 09:18 PM
2

Valid point. Variety is the spice of life for me right now. I did go through a rough patch during quarantine though where I just really felt alone, but overall I'm good coming home to an empty house.
/r/TheRedPill24/07/20 08:53 PM
6

I don't think it is going to be different this time around merely because of what I wrote above, but I do honestly think it will be different this time around for a variety of reasons. Right now, getting married a second time isn't on my radar as I've never really gotten to experience the level of freedom I have right now. I'm in literally no hurry to give that up and my sex life isn't at risk of being lost, so I'm completely happy just riding solo. Getting married isn't something I need, but I …
/r/TheRedPill24/07/20 05:44 PM
3

I'm in structural design/engineering-ish. I actually don't even have a bachelors degree. I have an associates, but I'm not bogged down by student loans and leveraged my desire to learn and lead into good roles. There's always someone with greater socioeconomic status, though and I'm cool with that. Ideally, I'd like to climb higher on the financial ladder, but I don't view it as a barrier of entry where I'm at for meeting quality women. Am I pulling women that want to spend their day on a yacht …
/r/TheRedPill23/07/20 08:00 PM
3

There was a time I was a dude that would have said you were lying. I would have said women want to feel romance and intimacy and the lovey dovey shit and doing those things are abusive and mean and humiliating. Balance is important to sustaining something I think, but when it comes right down to it, what they want is to be tossed on the bed and validate their weakness against their protector. It was a process for me coming to terms with the idea that it was possible to be too nice in the bedroom…
/r/TheRedPill23/07/20 03:05 PM
1

I would agree with this. Moreso, there was a mental block in my head causing me to not be able to get over that hump of the opposite side of the balance. Sex was too sensual, too caressing 100% of the time for me and it is what I am certain in hindsight failed to flip that switch in a many of their heads to crave more of me.
/r/TheRedPill23/07/20 02:56 PM
8

Yep. I remember my first cringe worthy date after my divorce. I walked her back to her door and asked her "can I kiss you?". She looked at me and said "did you seriously just ask if you could kiss me?". We had been vibing so well that night. Hindsight being 20/20, she was literally hinting me inside and I missed the clues... Those clues are the consent. We would end up going on more dates, but for quite awhile in my sex life that same "can I kiss you" mindset rolled over into the sheets and I th…
/r/TheRedPill23/07/20 01:06 PM
5

I'm not implying to keep pushing the bar until you're humiliating a girl with a plastic bag over her head. What I do know is that time and time again, once I actually figured my shit out, women would say in no uncertain terms "I like what you do with your hands" or "I hate when guys just jack rabbit hump me while I lay there".
/r/TheRedPill23/07/20 12:22 PM
4

I didn't intend to destroy the term, but I was failing to figure out a way to illustrate the difference between my approach to sex.
/r/TheRedPill23/07/20 11:44 AM
3

Sorry for the ramble, I just wanted to try to give some back story and journey to my conclusions. I wanted to show why I was freaked out, why dominance in bed was difficult at first and why I realized it was the missing component for keeping a good thing going longer than a few dates.
/r/TheRedPill23/07/20 11:41 AM
5

Glad I could resonate with you. I'm in my lower 30s, which has been an interesting age for dating. I have just as much mid 20s interest as I do 40+ cougars. So far, the concept has proven true across the various ages I've been with.
/r/TheRedPill23/07/20 03:55 AM
9

I have not yet stepped into the world of BDSM, but if you just look at the type of media women absorb (50 Shades of Grey, 365 Days, Twlight, any of that shit) you can see that even if the idea of bondage is outside their comfort zone, overwhelmingly so those movies/books are tapping into their desire to feel powerless against a powerful man.
/r/TheRedPill23/07/20 03:52 AM
11

True. I'm not saying making love is bad in the connotation of passion - girls will go wild for a little hopeless romantic shit. I think when I phrase it as such, I think I'm phrasing it as a sort of vanilla sex experience as a polar opposite to something more spiced up. I'm not sure if I verbalized it in a way that could be taken wrong, I just think I didn't have a good sense of balance in my sex life with how I asserted dominance. And that lack of assertion made an otherwise confident and power…
/r/TheRedPill23/07/20 03:18 AM
2

Already did when I bought her out. Both properties were at 75% LTV right now. That's in large part how I paid her out. I figure closing costs would be roughly $3000 and then amortized over that long would be costly. Appreciate the idea though.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/20 12:36 AM
1

I think I'm taking your advice on just getting a loan for a reasonable hybrid so I can cut out some fuel costs in my commute.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/20 03:31 PM
2

That's pretty much why we're going back to court. Our existing agreement would put her in contempt of court if she moved.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/20 03:30 PM
1

Everyone keeps telling me I'm a great dad and these cases are such an uphill battle and yet financial stress aside, the uncertainty is driving me nuts.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/20 03:29 PM
2

You would think that would keep her from going for more because it isn't necessary, but she has no empathy to my financial situation. Honestly, it was pretty tough. We had been together just shy of 14 years and I'm 31 years old. We married in mid 20s because she wanted to live off campus (one of those "if you love me things" and I thought she was my best friend that loved me unconditionally. Then she lost a bunch of weight to be back to where she was when we first met and just completely changed…
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/20 03:28 PM
1

Iowa
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/20 03:23 PM
1

Because a new spouse has no bearing on child support payments. There's a court order from before she was divorced 2 years ago and the income of a new spouse doesn't count into the calculation and I'm looking at $6,000 just to make a stink about adjusting child support with no likelihood of success on that alone. I have joint legal custody with her having primary custody. She was adament about it and frankly with my work schedule (Monday-Thursday) it was best for the kids as it is and I get every…
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/20 03:17 PM
1

It didn't. In Iowa, 150 miles is considered significant, but even if it did have that in the decree to begin with, we'd still be back to modifying it in court.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/20 02:30 AM
4

Appreciate it!
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/20 02:28 AM
2

I think that's probably what I'll end up doing. But even with stellar credit, the banks were wanting like 8% interest because of the amount being (get this) so low. Most of the banks weren't keen on financing a $6,000 vehicle at all and the buy here pay her places were just ridiculously priced. They'd happily sign me into a Mercedes at 0% for 84 months I can't actually afford, though. That just seemed crazy to finance at 8%, but its probably the only choice I have to be in a decent cash position…
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/20 02:28 AM
23

I don't know if "treating them like dirt" is necessarily the right approach unless you're looking for a girl with some serious daddy issues, but flirting with them while treating them like an option seems to work well. Once in awhile I'll get to know one well enough that I'm down to commitment. I tend to not treat women like absolute shit and instead show them some respect, they appreciate that. I don't not show them I'm interested because women of value are being pursued and my lack of interest…
/r/TheRedPill10/05/20 04:42 AM
1

I was pretty fortunate that the one I got hired on basically was just a pour beer and shoot the shit position. I knew a lot about craft beer so that helped. Right now they are desperate for help with crowlers even though business is down.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/20 12:28 AM
9

Take my man card but I started blogging about my struggles and it kind of evolved from there. That turned into freelance web design I do on the weekends. I also started working at a brewery. Helped with my social life and made some cash and met women. Win. Win.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/20 12:19 AM
11

Just enjoy being single without the pressure of having to date. The dates will come, though you will learn over time how flirt and present yourself again just as you did when you met your ex. I started dating early too soon after divorce. It wasn't smart to get into a serious relationship too soon and I regret that, but interestingly enough it was really good for my self esteem. I went from feeling undesireable to realizing other people wanted me. And so I think making a point to keep things cas…
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/20 05:16 PM
2

This resonates with me. I realized in hindsight that I stayed in the relationship when I should have been the one to call it quits many years earlier because I figured if she "loved me" despite my insecurities than she was deserving of my unconditional love in return. Dating from a position of confidence has been a completely different experience as I sort of have this abundance mindset. One day you're going to meet other women, and whether it is a casual relationship or turns into love, you wil…
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/20 12:20 AM
3

I'm of the camp that love is an ebb and flow. She divorced me after our second child. She was certain she didn't love me anymore. Her mom recently expressed to me that despite remarrying a year later, she isn't happy and her friends have told me she has regrets and realized when she wrote her new vows how she basically ignored one the ones she wrote to me because "love" . What does love even look like? Is it the butterflies? Is it the infatuation? Is it constantly looking around the corner for t…
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/19 05:49 PM
2

This is going to come off judgy, but I don't intend it to. I'm just speaking from my dating while separated experience. I dated and I recognize it had certain benefits to my well being. I was feeling insecure having been rejected by the one person that I thought would love me forever, so having matches and dates was a boost of confidence. I also wish I would have waited a bit longer. I survived 16 years of my childhood fapping, I wish I would have just done the same through the divorce process. …
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/19 05:34 PM
1

This was a much better explanation and comes off much more professional. This is the type of substance that makes it look like you have an actual system in place to help men through the difficult and alien world of dating post divorce from both an emotional damage aspect and dating aspect. You are entirely right that there is a lot personal work that men must go through, which is why I don't entirely discount the guidance, I just think the approach could use some work. I would lead in with what …
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/19 02:50 PM
4

To be frank, it just seems a little predatory. I get we all have choices and if someone is divorced recently and wants to pay a match maker, then so be it. That's a pretty delicate point in a divorced man's life (returning to dating) and so on one hand I could see how some professional guidance would be helpful, but this doesn't strike me as entirely professional from a counseling standpoint - especially since what you're promising is a "dream girl" rather than a reasonable, healthy relationship…
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/19 01:41 PM
18

I have a better understanding of all the red flags I was oblivious to. I have a better awareness of what I want in a relationship. I have a greater confidence in myself to walk away from toxic women - even if she has one hell of a voodoo clam. From that, I like to believe I stand a greater chance of having a relationship in which marriage would work, because I like the concept of marriage. That said, as much as I like the concept, it no longer holds the same value to me as it used to. I realize …
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/19 06:57 PM
5

I know you're pissed, I know you want to throw her name under the rug - I sympathize with you on so many levels. There's a couple of points at play here. A.) If you go on the offensive and attack her, you're giving her the very examples of "emotional abuse" that she can use against you as justification for her actions. I'm not saying she is justified but I'm saying, you're giving her ammunition to spin your smear campaign as a toxic trait of your entire relationship. This was done to me. My ex-w…
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/19 01:10 PM
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