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CerebralAssazin Archive

View 0 posts and 58 comments by CerebralAssazin on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Yes. I have mine split into thirds for my kids and my current ltp. If that changes, I’ll readjust my beneficiaries. Edit: My kids are adults, but when they were under 18 I had trusts set up so if all that money got dispersed, it would go into trust so my ex couldn’t blast through it ‘for the kids’.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/24 04:38 PM
8

I found myself being better because recognized the time I had was previous, something I didn’t realize before divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 10:46 PM
4

She tried, which was about right since she never tried when we were married. Noped on out.
/r/Divorce_Men29/02/24 01:52 PM
2

No one enforces adultery in Wisconsin, it’s just one of those old laws that never goes away.
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 12:37 AM
2

The most solid advice you’re going to get at this point is from your attorney. There’s a lot of nuances when it comes to DV. The biggest misconception is that there has to be physical violence. That is not the case, you can get into a loud argument with your significant other and potentially be charged with DV under certain circumstances. So, you forcing your way through a locked door could be construed as a DV event. You’re 50/50 with the injunction being dismissed. If it’s held in place, the j…
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/22 05:04 PM
1

Yea, she had a doctor certify she couldn’t work, so the CS was readjusted based on her disability income.
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/22 08:57 PM
1

That’s a pickle and definitely worth securing an attorney for.
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/22 01:08 PM
2

CS is generally a separate ‘line item’ within your decree. Nothing in your decree outside of support for the kids should be at play here. And by ‘support’ for the kids I mean things like clothing, medical, extra-curricular responsibilities. Ie: She can’t file for a modification of child support and attack your 401k for instance. Example: My decree said I didn’t have to split clothing. A year later she didn’t like that and was able to get it modified to 50/50, which is generally standard practice…
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/22 01:02 PM
1

If I could deal with living with my ex I wouldn’t be divorced...
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/20 05:37 PM
1

Good for you. I can’t get myself to go that far, but I did give her a turkey I got for free the other day 😂
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/20 05:38 PM
1

They got remarried.
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/20 01:56 AM
2

Nope, best I do is make sure I give my kids money to get her something, but this is the last year for that too ‘cause my youngest turns 18 in a few months.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/20 01:40 AM
3

I know a lot guy that did this, seems to be working out well the second time around. Personally, I would not do it, but every situation is different.
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/20 05:20 PM
3

I did. I have one adult kid and one nearly an adult. I have no desire to have more kids and start over with an infant at 45 years old. Plus I’m 8 years out from my pension, so I’m prepared to enjoy my retirement.
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/20 12:58 PM
1

From my experience, the student would have to authorize third party access. My oldest was confused with financial aid so she had to authorize the university to talk to me about it. My guess is your child gave mom access, but mom isn’t willing to share that knowledge with you. You might want to talk to your kid and see if they’ll authorize you as well.
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/20 01:02 PM
2

I had some issues with this the first year or so as well. Her family members would ask for babysitting services from my oldest during my time. Mine were older and I explained to my oldest that I wanted my time with, but I wouldn’t stop them from going. In the end they didn’t go. I tried to have that conversation with the ex, but it never went anywhere. One of the many reasons I was unhappy, she couldn’t muster the backbone to stand up to her family when they shat on me.
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/20 12:56 PM
5

I bought her out, she didnt want the house. Best part of it is her rent is almost twice as much as my mortgage
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/20 12:36 PM
1

Can you take out the money and put it into a trust in his name? Side note: if she is collecting ‘rent’ from him, those are funds she is required to report as income for child support purposes.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/20 02:45 PM
1

I used to want it out there, but then I said screw it. Those who stuck by me know better, those who didn’t...see ya. People are going to believe what they want, or to what fits their narrative. And really, it’s none of their business. If they’re digging for information, it’s to gossip and I don’t need that b.s. in my life anymore. I got burned by a lifelong friend and his wife. She was close to my ex, whom I introduced to her. He was salty I wasn’t telling him what’s going on. When I did, he tol…
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/20 06:58 PM
1

I bought her out of my house, but in my case my mortgage payment and property taxes are 2/3rds of what rent would have been for me. I sat down and wrote out a budget and found places to cut expenses. I sold my truck and got into a lease, which saved me about 100 a month. Shopped around for new homeowners/car insurance, ‘cut the cable’, changed where I grocery shop (Aldi vs regular store). Moved some credit card debt I was stuck with to a lower interest rate loan. For me, even though I had a writ…
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/20 01:17 PM
5

Hell, I’ve had people who have been divorced and remarried say stuff like that. It really boils down to everyone’s life experiences are different and shape their opinions on things.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/20 03:01 PM
1

Good for you. I’m a bit jealous you were able to do that, my ex is the least empathetic person I know and I don’t believe she has the self-awareness to be able to see how she contributed to our split. Personally, I won’t give her the satisfaction of telling her I understand my own failures while she skirts on seeing hers.
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/20 05:15 PM
2

Lots of states do that due to having to establish paternity
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/20 03:26 AM
1

The general rule is, the relationship had to have started before they became a client. So you would also have to prove when the sexual relationship started. The language of that changes from state to state as they all have their own ethics rules. For me it would be, ‘so what’. It doesn’t affect how your attorney represents you or changes any of the facts of the case. The only thing I could see here is that filing a complaint could elongate the divorce process as the other party would likely have…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/20 04:33 PM
7

1-Doubt it 2-Rent is different than an affair, I suspect you’ll have to provide evidence of an affair. Good luck man, keep your head up.
/r/Divorce_Men13/08/20 06:41 PM
3

Kids learn how to form relationships from watching ours. All you’re doing is keeping yourself miserable and teaching them that your relationship with your wife is ‘normal’.
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/20 02:10 AM
4

For me, I would just say it’s been financially difficult to save a lot of money for college due to financial obligations to her mother. I would leave the spread sheet out of it. The spread sheet to me feels almost like a blame game exercise; ‘Look at all the money I was forced to give your mom, what did she spend it on??’ I’ve had similar talks with my adult child as I’m still paying on my youngest. I’ve just said simply, ‘I’ll help as much as I can, but remember I’m still giving mom money for y…
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/20 12:57 PM
3

The instructions with mine said to make a best guess for things like food, clothing, entertainment, just make sure it’s a reasonable guess. I lumped stuff like electronics together, like video game and consoles.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/20 02:27 PM
1

As everyone else stated, do not let this slip into your parenting plan. Beyond dating, if you ever decide to get married again, you’ll have to go back to family court to deal with it. It’s nonsense controlling language.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/20 05:34 PM
2

I got to the point I didn’t care anymore and would find excuses not to spend time with her when it came to family stuff. When we were with friends, we’d barely talk to each other and she’d get blackout drunk. We generally spent every weekend with friends, so that level of drunk was a weekly event. I asked her to go to counseling with me. She went on for twenty minutes about she didn’t want the kids in a split house yada yada, not once did she ask why I wanted to go or what was wrong. She knew, s…
/r/Divorce_Men24/07/20 04:34 PM
3

When I asked her to go to marriage counseling and she spent 20 minutes talking about herself, then proceeded to act like I hadn’t asked for 2 months. It was about that time I figured out the marriage was just a convenience to her.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/20 03:58 PM
1

Describes my ex to a T, except she didn’t get bored with it, she was quite content. I on the other hand got tired of it, which is why she’s an ex now. But I don’t believe all women are like this. My current g/f works hard and gets hers on her own.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/20 02:16 PM
5

Less stress, no more of her toxic ass family bleeding into our household. Never having to wonder where I stand with someone. Oddly enough, financially more secure even though CS guts me; since now I don’t have to prop her up financially while she works as little as possible. Not having to feel guilty about doing stuff with friends. List goes on, long story short; of all the things I regret, divorce isn’t one of them.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/20 02:25 PM
3

My ex is like this with homework, she’ll ask but not check; and he’ll lie about doing it if you let him. It’s to the point now that when I tell her he’s not doing it, she doesn’t even respond. I’ve taken to not saying anything to her anymore and dealing with him directly even when he’s over there.
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/20 01:59 PM
2

I’m retrospect, yea, I suppose so. I definitely have a better idea of what I want and expect versus when I married the ex. A lot of that realization came from self healing though. The bigger signal to me is watching the dumpster fire that is happening in her life now. She found her white knight that lets her get away with the things I wouldn’t go for and a lot of it is blowing up in her face. I don’t take pleasure in it, but it reinforces that I made the right call.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/20 06:31 PM
1

I had the house appraised, refinanced the mortgage at what was the current balance, then paid her half the equity. So if the house is worth 200,000 and mortgage balance was 150,000, she got 25,000.
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/20 04:27 PM
3

She’s trying to buy you out, that speaks volumes. I’d pay twice the support if I had to, to get 50/50. Stick to your guns.
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/20 04:23 PM
1

Hopefully you have you ability to hold her feet to the fire and get her into court. She’ll keep pushing the envelope of you don’t.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/20 06:24 PM
2

You can not file head of household unless they are there more than 50% of the time. You would need to get her to agree not to file HoH so you could.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/20 05:36 PM
1

No she didn’t, the IRS doesn’t care what the court order says, they only care about where the kids lived more than 50% of the year. She is in contempt of court, but there are no tax code violations here. Op needs to file a contempt motion and have her explain to the judge why she’s violating the order.
/r/Divorce_Men28/02/20 05:34 PM
1

I pay my monthly CS and carry the insurance. I do get a ‘variance’ in the monthly CS amount that equals half of the difference between a single insurance plan and the family plan. Meaning she has to pay half that difference in the form of reduced monthly CS. ‘Variable expenses’ are then split 50/50- doctor bills, school registration fees and clothes is really all that’s left right now to split, due to my kid being a teenager with a job. A lot of times if she owes me less than 20 bucks, I don’t e…
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/20 03:57 PM
9

Kids are more observant and aware than people give them credit for. I get what you’re saying, but they learn how to be in relationships from watching ours. I would seek out some counseling and really think about if staying is the right thing not only for you, but for the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/20 08:31 PM
5

I don’t, I walk away from conversations that go like that. Took me about a year after divorce to be able to do it. I don’t need the frustration that an argument brings so I just leave it be and document the issues in the event I find myself in court for something.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/20 02:26 AM
1

Yea, but the court will stall your proceedings to deal with paternity. Will end up being a hassle more than anything.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/20 01:12 PM
1

Would be a problem for you though too. There’s a presumption that if she’s pregnant it’s yours since you’re married. Your divorce proceedings will essentially stop in its tracks until the child is born so paternity can be determined.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/20 12:54 PM
0

Relationship no, marriage yes.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/20 05:35 PM
2

Says ‘thank you’ even though I’m not looking for thanks for doing mundane things. Gives non-verbal cues that she is invested in the relationship.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/20 05:35 PM
1

I would call the offices and see if they can notify you about appointments. Most do some sort of automated notification so it shouldn’t be an issue to put you on that list.
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/19 07:38 PM
5

She’s toxic. She doesn’t see it as her ‘blowing’ her money. She sees it as bankrupting him.
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/19 07:37 PM
2

Shouldn’t, as long as the home has the room for you and the kids. 50/50 is about as good as you’ll get unless you can prove she’s an unfit mother.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/19 01:12 AM
7

Adultery generally won’t factor into placement at all, even in ‘fault’ divorce states. Only thing adultery generally factors into is potential alimony payments and possibly marital assets. Edit: unless you can prove the affair has changed their fitness as a parent. The act in itself does not change the fitness.
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/19 07:09 PM
1

That’s state dependent. Some states won’t let you change the beneficiary or trust designations until it’s final. I’d check with a estate planning attorney.
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/19 05:13 PM
1

Yes; after the divorce is final. All you have to do is literally tear it into shreds. Make sure you make a new one though.
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/19 07:38 PM
1

That’s a tough one. I still help my adult daughter since she’s a college student, but she at the very least still calls and texts. If she wasn’t a student, she’s been told she’ll be responsible for her own bills I’m currently covering. If she wasn’t keeping contact with me because Of animosity, I’d be inclined to cut her off unless she asked directly for help.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/19 07:42 PM
1

Went home and went to bed, I was bummed out about it. Divorce is not fun, regardless of why it happened.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/19 01:02 PM
1

I meant the other posters about their utilities. She was toxic, but in fairness, I had my own demons to work out as well. 😂
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/19 04:32 PM
1

You’re apparently not that far off based on everyone else’s experiences. Although I did replace the ex with a live in g/f.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/19 04:10 PM
1

Weird, none of my utilities have seen a decrease.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/19 03:52 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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