TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

CherryEuphoric3557 Archive

View 2 posts and 76 comments by CherryEuphoric3557 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
29

CherryEuphoric3557/r/Divorce_Men21/11/25 12:53 AM
2

CherryEuphoric3557/r/Divorce_Men06/03/26 04:14 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

I'm so sorry man, it's such a brutal part in your life. I am still haunted a bit by the look on the face of my oldest when he realized what was happening. But you know what? Today, almost 10 months later, I'm sitting in my living room with my boys, about to go do some fun stuff with them for the day, and we are figuring it out together. The best way through it is to be there for them. I saw someone else's post that they will do well if you do which is very true. Don't talk badly about your ex in…
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/26 01:59 PM
12

First, I'm really sorry to hear this, that sounds horrible. I lived with my ex after she asked for a divorce until it was finalized and I closed on my new house. The hard truth is that it didn't start getting better until I moved out. I basically spiraled for 3 months straight which included her going out on New Years with a friend while I was home with the kids. I used that really dark time to make a plan though. I worked on my future budget, I set up a workout calendar that I have stuck to rel…
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/26 04:25 PM
2

Damn dude, I'm so sorry, I don't really have room to complain, but I feel for you. We did it all without lawyers. They seem like the only ones to win in a divorce. Good luck. My favorite thing during that time was drinking an old fashioned on an exercise bike while I played battlefield 5 on Xbox. Always room for more in the game with me 😁. Hang in there
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/26 03:18 AM
5

Necessary evil man, I did it for 2.5 months and it was absolutely the worst part. The good thing is though that when you get in your own place, the sense of relief is overwhelming and helps through the first isolated stages. Best of luck to you buddy, it'll get better
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/26 12:17 AM
4

I felt such shame and embarrassment the first time I walked my kids to school after my ex told the neighborhood wives. What I realized or at least believe now, is that most of the stuff was in my head. And if not and they do happen to be judging me, F 'em, they're not worth my time anyway.
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/26 04:35 PM
4

That's brutal, I'm sorry. One foot in front of the other and just keep going. It will eventually get better.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/26 10:16 PM
2

This, I wouldn't agree to anything up to her discretion for me to live the adults only half of my life.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/26 10:39 PM
2

Don't do it, it gets better, I promise you. Make a different plan, make a different routine and structure, follow it and repeat. Gym, walks, being outside, and leaning on your social structure. Do anything that is a positive movement forward no matter how small, and build momentum from there.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/26 02:15 AM
3

Yikes, how does she even approach that when she is clearly hanging out with this other dude in the meantime? I'm sorry, that all sucks
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/26 03:05 AM
1

I really like that. I hate to beat the drum of "sexism goes both ways", but that was the first time I felt that. Why would I move two hours away from my kids? Because I'm a dude? No, I'll make it work and keep 50/50 thank you very much
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/26 04:28 PM
5

Yeah I got that only once, and it made me so mad after the fact because of the kids factor too. Try to ignore the noise, focus on the kids and making yourself better.
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/26 04:13 AM
5

Hit the gym and put that anger/hate to some good use
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/26 05:32 PM
4

Dude, I'm sorry that sounds like a super sad situation. If you have no place to go until your new place is ready a few weeks, I say lay low as much as you can and then when you're out, break the cycle. Show your son that you can be a different family for him. What you do with the relationship with the rest of your family, that'll probably take a lot of self-reflection as to how much you want them in your life. Hang in there
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/26 05:05 PM
5

So I totally agree that outside influences can have an impact on that. No doubt about that...but, what has really helped my healing is to look at in a more realistic light such as "she made this choice, she knows what she is doing to me, etc." That allowed me to look at her in a different way. She made the choice because SHE thought it was best for her. Placing the blame on others shifts the emotional hurt and anger onto others rather than the woman you either thought you loved or truly loved. T…
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/26 03:30 PM
10

My ex says the same BS. I'm just always like "come on, you and I both know the difference there." Also, I literally said the same thing to myself about something she was mad about shortly after the divorce. Can't divorce me twice. Fool me once shame on you. Fool me...you can't get fooled again!
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/26 01:42 PM
3

Agree on both points
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/26 01:00 PM
4

I'm not a bot and I don't agree with a guy in his 20s ranting in our subreddit. He hasn't gone through what this sub is actually for. It's not red pill, it's not guys who never want to get married. It's for supporting other guys going through their darkest relationship days. Just because people don't agree with his post, doesn't mean it's bots. Why would anyone care enough to deploy bots in this subreddit? Jesus
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 02:54 AM
2

I've only been married once (11 years + dating/engagement), but watching that crumble felt like it aged me about 10 years. Most days I think it aged me in a good way, I'm definitely more cynical though which is ok to me. I totally agree that reading other stories have been so helpful. When I was in the cohabitation hell phase before moving out, I read a ton of this sub, and I came out with a game plan. How to be a good dad, creating a structure that I would fall into rather than hit the bar all …
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/26 05:08 PM
5

That is so well said. He's basically a tourist in our world. I have depended on this sub so heavily that I get defensive about our house, and people who haven't been through it trying to say that our hard earned understanding and life experience just arrives at their conclusion. Yeah right, you don't get to the next emotional level without staring into the darkness. Love your post
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/26 04:53 PM
3

I'm really sorry you're going through that. It's really rough, and it all takes time. My fundamental disagreement with OP is that you shouldn't live a life being avoidant. Take your lumps and make sure you learn/grow from them.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/26 03:54 PM
7

Nah man, reading your post once was enough for me. Grow up Edit: you posted in the only subreddit that has actually helped me. You aren't divorced, you're being avoidant, and buying into a narrative in your head
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/26 03:46 PM
6

I think you have your personal stuff on the right path, but I think you're projecting your feelings on their weddings. I don't regret getting married, and conversely, I don't regret getting divorced even though it wasn't my choice. Life is a journey and those bumps are making me who I am now, someone I like more than ever before in my life. Do whatever you feel is right for yourself, but if you only give surface level, you'll only ever get that back in return. Sounds like you're operating out of…
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/26 03:32 PM
1

I think that as long as you prioritize your healing and growth (including creating a social circle of your own), then you can hang out when the timing works for you. Personally, I would never prioritize the time with her over other things. Choice between meeting up with a buddy you may not be too close to for a beer or a movie at her house? I say choose the beer. On the way to the gym, but she invites you out to a dinner? Go the gym. Don't bend your world around her anymore, that time has to be …
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/26 10:39 PM
3

When it started to feel like a weight on my finger as Tolkien described in Lord of the Rings. Just like LOTR, it also appeared to make me invisible in my own house. I went from not noticing it for 10 years to feeling it constantly. It came off that night when I got home from work, it felt like a lie after she took hers off.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/26 03:31 AM
3

Yeah man, I'm in my own house now and I am thankful for that every day. My ex didn't cheat on me, and we got along well enough, but the limbo stage of cohabitation is hell. Like the above statement, do not drag it out, create a plan/structure for yourself when you're on your own, and start working through the mental/emotional side when you can on your own.
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/26 01:20 AM
2

Yeah, it was not fun and telling our kids the day after Thanksgiving was the worst part, but I also think that the intense pain, when it happened, and cohabitation during it were all extremely clarifying. It was so dark, so cold out, and I felt so trapped. It has propelled me to grow more than I had imagined and get back in touch with myself. I'm doing a lot better, thank you for asking. This subreddit helped a ton, leaning on my support, working out like a demon, and learning new instruments ha…
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/26 02:10 PM
2

I'm just riding the waves about 4 months out. My ex asked for a divorce a week before Thanksgiving so I went through Thanksgiving, picking out a Christmas tree, Christmas, then New Year's (on my own with my kids at our house, she went out with a friend) all while knowing it was ending. Guess what I'm doing for the holidays this year? None of that bullshit! I'm still experiencing the pain too, but man, when I think back on when she asked and what those holidays were like...glad to be on my own in…
/r/Divorce_Men29/04/26 01:48 PM
2

That isn't necessarily the case for me. It definitely made everything in our relationship worse, but it was because she would focus on stuff like her phone and interrupting that became a big flashpoint. It also just felt like her personality completely changed.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 04:27 PM
1

This is a really interesting take since my ex was diagnosed with ADHD in her mid 30s. She got on medicine and I swear everything changed. I feel like there is so much gaslighting, and it's as if she genuinely believes what's she's saying even if it contradicts what she just said out loud the day before. Wild, makes me feel crazy until I am alone and can work to shrug it off.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 03:31 PM
3

I'm a bit younger than you (37), but I lost a lot of my friendships over 11 years and 2 kids. I'm trying to find ways to meet people outside of bars. My ex is being super social and I just can't seem to get it into gear because although I don't always feel alone, a lot of times I feel quite lonely no matter what room I'm in and who is in it. I saw the other comment mentioning a men's group. I just did that and I'll be going back when I can for sure. I'm at the gym a lot, but we all have headphon…
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/26 03:04 AM
2

I wasn't happy to get divorced, but damn, I am happy to be done with marriage counseling.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 02:34 PM
1

Had experience b which definitely didn't help where I was at mentally. Lowest point in my life, and my ex found a woman to validate every issue she ever had with me. The therapist even stopped me mid sentence, told me that I probably have a lot of valid concerns, but we need to focus on what was bothering my ex. Whole lot of good that did. Personal therapist = great, definitely recommend.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 02:46 AM
3

I have the same and read somewhere on this subreddit leading up my divorce to take care of all the boring chore stuff when you don't have them so you can focus on them when it's your kid time. That was really helpful. I would also say to pick up a hobby or something if you don't have one. Buy that bike you wanted, but never bought, start playing an instrument, etc. Also take that time to recharge and be ready to give them 100% every time you have the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/26 09:02 PM
2

I like the way you put that. Humble is true for sure. Brick by brick, I'm building up the life I want and I'm taking ownership over the successes/failures. That first month is a bitch though.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/26 06:43 PM
2

Hang in there, as others said, do not do anything permanent. I get that feeling, trust me, I do. But man, I'm 3 months out from divorce and moving out and I have to tell you that from the other side of that wall, it does get better. I know it feels unimaginable right now. I remember feeling sick to my stomach with sadness, fear, grief, anger...all of the emotions. That's normal man, don't become a statistic. As silly as it may sound too, this subreddit has helped me more than anything on the Int…
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/26 03:18 AM
6

Buddy, this one hit me hard out of nowhere too. No easy way around it. I have the kids and we got in a bit of an argument. Who I see in front of me is not the person that I fell in love with and it makes me grumpy.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/26 02:02 AM
1

When my wife sent me the papers. Sounds like you need to get some therapy though, couples and individual.
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/26 12:34 AM
4

Damn, that is really rough, there is no way around that fact. You're in the right place on this subreddit though, it has helped me so much. I would shut off your own access to that tracking shit, it's just going to drive you crazy. What good does it do you to know? I have found that my only peace is really not knowing anything about what my ex is doing. I think you may find Dr. Marika Steinborn on YouTube helpful to sort through why you're going through those emotions and the feelings of betraya…
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/26 03:01 AM
1

Honestly, I get along pretty well with my ex right now, but that doesn't mean the anger or sadness went away. Super early on, I would have completely understood your stance. Now, a few months out and seeing what it's like when you're not their main person, you don't necessarily share everything with them, and there could be other people coming into the picture, I feel the only safe place is creating that distance. What happens when that snuggling on the couch becomes a problem to her new partner…
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/26 11:30 PM
1

There is no easy answer, but think it's reasonable to expect better clarity on the situation before you commit to that. Based on my experience, if you sell your house and buy a new one, if one of you keeps the new house, the person moving out will have to be removed from the mortgage...through refinancing which means another loan with all of the costs that come with it. Moving doesn't fix anything in your marriage, I learned that first hand.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/26 10:59 PM
1

I totally understand that. If you think there is any chance, and you truly think the relationship is right for you and your family, I would do everything you can to fix it. I did that, and I think it helped to alleviate the feelings of guilt on top of all the other emotions. I did everything I could up and through the end, I can and have to live with that. I would recommend not moving (to a new house as a family unit) until everything is firmed up though, because we did that and burned through u…
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/26 10:44 PM
4

You're about where I was 6 months prior to my ex finally getting the courage to officially ask for divorce and file the next day. Do what you feel is right, but most the people here are probably correct. I'm sorry, it's hard and it sucks. There is no way out except through the gauntlet.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/26 10:37 PM
5

Excellent advice, and totally agree with exercise to help you crash. I work out as hard as I can and then I can't stay awake when the time rolls around.
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/26 11:55 PM
2

Hey man, I'm sorry to hear what you're going through. I'm right there with you emotionally. I don't understand why some people are jumping your ass on this. The way you are feeling is valid because that's your experience. That being said, go hit the gym or something and keep that stuff to yourself rather than let on to your ex about it. Been there, have done that (different situation and divorce was super fresh) and it goes nowhere good. I think for me, the hardest part is when they turn their b…
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/26 12:12 AM
3

I like your post, well said
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/26 03:58 AM
1

Yeah, that didn't change until I was out of the house. Like 2 years of it, surprised my heart didn't explode
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/26 05:40 PM
1

Very true. I mostly found it as an interesting insight into the evolution of my mindset as I moved from the marriage to being single.
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/26 05:22 PM
2

Amen
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/26 09:43 PM
1

I'm still in the thick of post divorce emotions, and I'm less than 2 months out from it. Last week, I was pretty angry... basically all week. Yesterday it turned to sadness. I talked to my therapist today which was helpful, he said all normal. We also talked about being bitter or holding onto the resentment when she starts dating or moving on however. He said "you may feel that way today, but do you really want to be beholden to her like that in the future where her actions still have such an ef…
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/26 08:18 PM
1

Honestly, I think you're correct on both ends of that spectrum. It is not simple with a kid in the mix, but all of those things you named have been my life savers in this. Controlling what I can, falling into a productive routine, and trying to let go of the rest. Those emotions are normal I think, who the hell knows what normal is though.
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/26 08:29 PM
1

When you figure that out, let me know because I have run into almost exactly the same phrase/convo recently. I have been dealing with a lot of anger/resentment this week which is natural, but hard. In my case, I can't get over that we all (kids included) went through this extraordinary pain for what seems like the sake of girls nights, bars, and house parties. We're in our mid-late 30s and she says that I'm upset she's going out. I'm not upset she's going out, I'm upset I only see my kids 50% of…
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/26 03:44 PM
2

Damn, that's brutal, sorry to hear it. I'm almost 2 months in and we're still figuring out the boundaries.
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/26 04:16 AM
9

I wish you the best of luck. I wouldn't personally buy into the talk of future plans as proof she doesn't want a divorce, not that I feel she is intentionally misleading you. My ex would do the same all the way up to a week before she filed. Who knows the psychology behind it and obviously my ex is not your wife, but I experienced similar which also confused the hell out me at the time too. As a side note, you deserve better than to be a side character in her life, waiting for the shoe to drop. …
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 12:15 AM
1

First, I'm sorry if you are going through a situation like that where you want more time than your ex wants/gets, but can't have it. Totally understand it. It's tough for us because we looked into basically all the various schedules and this was the only option that worked for our current work schedules. We may adjust it later on after we get a feel for it. Just the shock of going to 50/50 from full time parent has been hard in itself so it may be better to look at it with a clear head after the…
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/26 05:43 PM
1

We are a few weeks into the 5-2-2-5 schedule and it feels brutal by the end of 5 days with not seeing them consistently in that time. I have a friend who does 4-3-3-4 or something like that. Seems to work alright for them.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/26 03:40 PM
1

So far the gym has been the most helpful, but learning a new skill or pursuing a hobby has also been huge.
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/26 02:15 PM
5

I have lived in my own house for a few weeks and still trying to figure this out. OP, I had an amicable split and it was still so hard during the beginning, but it does eventually even out. Hang in there
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/26 03:43 AM
1

😂 I went with the mandolin, but the bass would have been a good option.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 01:54 PM
1

Completely agree
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/26 08:34 PM
2

This comment hits close to home...
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/26 09:20 PM
4

Thank you
/r/Divorce_Men20/01/26 01:51 AM
7

Totally agree, we didn't even have to go to mediation. The two of us agreeing on the split and custody, chatgpt premium, and an online portal. Started the marriage surrounded by friends celebrating it and ended it behind a computer screen. We didn't even see a judge in person, and it's all finalized as of early January.
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/26 07:15 PM
2

This is my favorite answer 😂
/r/Divorce_Men16/01/26 03:52 AM
2

I'm sorry to hear it. I move out tomorrow and going through the same emotions. Dreading it and also just ready to be done with it all at the same time.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/26 08:54 PM
3

This is my situation starting on Friday. I have never lived alone, but I'm a lot less concerned about the silence as this cohabitation purgatory has been such a strange and hard experience.
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/26 01:13 PM
3

We didn't use any lawyers or mediation. We agreed to a 50/50 split of everything financial and 50/50 custody so we just filed everything ourselves. She asked for the divorce right before Thanksgiving and it was official as of earlier this week. I'm about to move out to my new house. It sucks, but I'm not going to beg to stay with someone who doesn't want to be with me.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/26 03:57 AM
2

I'm sorry to hear that you're going through this. We are starting that exact schedule in less than 2 weeks when I move out. What has helped me mentally: -Putting my workout schedule on the calendar along with the days I have my kids -Researching hobbies that I may be interested in trying, but haven't had time -Thinking through recipes to cook when I have the kids vs. when I don't -Looking into community events that will happen after I move out It's really tough, no doubt, but I hope you can try …
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 09:21 PM
6

Man up and pick your children in this situation. You cheated on their mom and married your AP, look in the mirror at your role in this.
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/25 09:33 PM
5

Interesting that you said failure because I literally used that same exact word in therapy this morning. Mine was in the context of failing our children since we couldn't make it work as a married couple. My therapist said that we all fail our children in a variety of ways, regardless of relationship status or if people stay married. That helped me because I can just focus on being the best possible father for them regardless of what's happening and removed the shame of failure. You didn't and w…
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/25 04:27 PM
2

I'm in the same boat, we are trying to decide on when to tell them, but she already filed so it's just a matter of time. It's just us and our children in the home I'll be leaving eventually and it is the lowest I have ever felt on a holiday. Good luck today
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/25 12:08 AM
1

I keep coming back to: "Congrats on the kids. They are your ride or die. You have won at life. I know right now 50/50 sounds like you will lose so much time but you will be a far better parent having that time off. Being a single dad with an involved and amicable co-parent is utopia." I think and hope you're right about this. It's going to be a crazy change, your words on this keep coming back to me randomly so thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/25 04:43 PM
1

It may all be fresh for me, but I'm with you on marriage. I don't ever want to do the legal contract around a relationship again. I'm finding my own house that will be affordable for me in the neighborhood I want and I don't want to have to factor in anyone else's thoughts on that anymore. Not shutting myself off, I just can't see giving up the control over my own life again.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/25 04:41 PM
2

I'm really sorry to hear you're going through this. I'm basically in an identical situation. Really hard night, but hopefully a brighter morning on the way.
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/25 03:13 AM
2

I feel this already. This doesn't feel real, but unfortunately it is and official.
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/25 12:50 AM
2

Damn, that's rough, direct, and what I need. Also, had already been thinking on the TRT, thanks for the recommendation on that.
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/25 04:08 PM
2

I know you're right. Doesn't suck any less
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/25 01:13 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter