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CoatedWinner Archive

View 0 posts and 88 comments by CoatedWinner on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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6

Yeah I think there might be some mania going on. Best course of action is to go see someone and (not saying he is) get sober if hes not.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/25 10:58 AM
1

I get it but regardless of the reason there's a way out now. Let go of the past (know it's easier said than done) - don't blame anything on anyone - including yourself. Nobody is to blame. It just is what it is. Pretend you were born yesterday into your situation and you have the knowledge you have. Dig your way out. Start from ground 0. But call these agencies and do something about it, don't just roll over and die, file the paperwork, take steps to improve. You're at ground 0 - build something…
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/25 03:15 AM
21

Dude stop talking to your ex and/or her family. Who gives a fuck what they think. Radio silence, deal with stuff in court. Texting your ex's sister nudes of her is some wild shit
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/25 05:28 PM
1

I was gonna say I'd just stop paying alimony assuming it was based on some economic situation before. OP should focus on getting a better job, skimp on the alimony, obviously gotta pay the IRS but he can call them and negotiate a relief from wage garnishment depending on his situation, the IRS can let up temporarily if you explain what's going on. That plus less alimony should get him enough to get out of (I assume) sleeping in his car maybe find a couple roommates, keep head down, keep grinding…
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/25 03:34 PM
6

For sure. Especially with that many years it can be treated like literal grief just the same as if a loved one dies. Therapy is gonna be your best bet OP - please know you matter and stay with us, stay strong my dude!
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/25 09:05 PM
3

Play the long game and try not to react as much as possible. Just be indifferent. Doesn't mean don't stand up for yourself but instead of letting it get you down maintain a level of mild annoyance at it if anything and just ignore anything you don't have to fight in court. It'll stop soon after she realizes it's not affecting you and then she'll have time to let it go
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/25 10:12 PM
4

I agree with this. It depends on the maturity of the parties. If one party feels slighted or isn't able to find closure within themselves, they tend to intentionally disrupt and try to bring the other party down.
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/25 09:51 PM
6

Sorry you're depressed. It's not going to change your situation meaningfully to stay in bed all day. You may need a therapist or even an antidepressant if its too bad. If you find yourself with suicidal ideation, keep in mind its not weak to ask for help. On the financial side, men can and do recover often from financial setbacks incurred due to divorce, and it seems you were in a decent spot to begin with. There's no reason you can't rebuild to a decent position even with the amount of money yo…
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 04:23 PM
2

Thing about attachment is it can change with security. I'd recommend couples counselling. You will want to avoid less when you feel secure and can advocate for yourself. She will feel less anxious when she is secure and okay with your independence at certain times. You seem to have a handle on what makes you tick. Divorce is an option but it's hardly a fun one, only you know yourself well enough to make that call, the above is just my 2c.
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/25 10:46 PM
0

Lol yeah have to agree here.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/25 03:32 PM
3

Hate is strong, but you might. It's normally hard to hate someone for a very long period of time. Takes too much energy. You'll end up just feeling nothing for them eventually. Just keep your head up and keep it going. You'll recover, land on your feet, and be better for it. Sorry about the present - you got this though
/r/Divorce_Men26/02/25 12:48 AM
5

Lol i mean.. true. But he loved her and that's about as good a reason as any for me to support my bros
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/25 05:40 AM
5

Hey dude, my wife and I split at 25ish with a 3yo. I experienced a lot of similar feelings. So first, you're not alone. I also want to acknowledge it sounds like you have 3 kids you have married into and potentially accepted as your own, and I respect that immensely as others should. That's an amazing task you spent your life and effort on that nobody had to, but you did, for you, your ex, and for them. And don't let anybody take that from you. Second, you are 31, sounds like with no kids of you…
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/25 05:38 AM
5

Hey man hope you're doing alright. Shit sucks sometimes but use your energy towards positivity and self improvement.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/25 03:44 AM
2

This is a wild thread. You don't know other people. Sorry your experience with women was really awful but theres really no need to project your experience and insecurity onto others. Hope you find a way to lick your wounds and move on.
/r/Divorce_Men15/02/25 12:40 AM
13

Dude as someone who originally split with my wife and then got back together with her in an open relationship, so much about this screams red flags. Rules should be followed. Core relationships between two people need to have trust. Your wife broke that trust. The actual problem with cheating isn't the sex (for some people it is but its not what most people get the most upset about). It's the breaking of trust and the lying. Id exit. Doesn't necessarily mean permanently but spend some time alone…
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/25 06:42 AM
3

Neutral. I would be disappointed but if she's an adult she can make her own choices, just like any other adult. I don't even think "punishment" works really on anyone at any stage. Try to teach empathy and honesty to your kids. Punishment is 1) attention however negative for bad behavior and 2) reinforcement, however negative. Reinforcing and giving attention to bad behavior almost guarantees more bad behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/25 09:57 PM
0

You dont wanna take care of your 3 month old at all? Anyway... a massive percentage of divorces happen after having children. Its pretty common. If thats what you decide then go for it. I dont know your situation but it sounds like you got shelter and make enough for child support so power to you.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/22 05:05 AM
1

Imagine being so hateful to the person you married and had kids with that you'd willingly fuck your kids' lives up to get back at them. And then preach about doing no harm to others.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/22 08:50 AM
2

For kids? Forgiveness isnt for her. Its for you. If you want things amicable then be amicable. You cant control her, her feelings about what happened, what she did. You are only in control of yourself here. Forgiveness was never about the other person, its finding it in yourself to move past it. The best way forward is not to care what she thinks or feels and be the best father/adult you can be in a bad situation, and that's it. There's no hook. There's no way that fighting with her or genuinely…
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/22 12:31 PM
1

Heres the deal. Honesty and trust makes relationships. If you and him as adults cant conduct yourselves with basic decency for the feelings of the other or "x did it first" mentality you both have no business building a successful long term relationship or marriage. Do better. Who on the entire face of the planet cares about how he decides to justify it? Nobody here and you shouldnt either. Its obvious he didnt like you cheated. Its very sad but take your divorce, split as amicably as possible, …
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/22 09:11 PM
2

Depending on where you live if you have kids and live together its a divorce regardless of if youre married.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/22 10:05 AM
6

I got divorced and a few months later my dad died unexpectedly. Life is hard sometimes. We dont like the way it is. We do things to cope. Its not a problem. Just dont make it a habit. My honest advice as someone who feels they couldve written the exact same post almost 2 years ago, is find a good therapist and talk stuff out with them. Take a count of the blessings in your life and grasp onto the things that make you happy. Im truly sorry youre going through this but know you have many more than…
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/22 01:08 AM
6

Yeah im sure some men do this but its got to be pretty rare, dont hear about it a lot, even from divorce attorneys. I will say my ex and I split up on an amicable basis and besides a few not following clauses in the parenting plan on her end at the very beginning she's always recognized my place as our son's father as important and never took me through this rigamarole in the courts. It makes me sick to my stomach the few divorced men I know and this board how often this stuff happens..
/r/Divorce_Men21/03/22 05:47 PM
4

Mine never took my name - and we arent much into social media so it never mattered. Many dont and change it back or just put their middle name (which is probably a good idea to make your social media harder to find anyway.) But it depends on a lot. Professional/personal relationships. And self image. Maybe they like the last name. Maybe they just dont want to spend the minimal effort to change it. Maybe they dont want to broadcast to people who dont know them well that they are recently divorced…
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/22 11:12 PM
2

For what reasons?
/r/Divorce_Men16/09/21 12:46 AM
5

What does your custody order say? You should have something detailed like "right of first refusal" or req. Emergency contact info if she leaves the state. Right of first refusal means you get the option first to watch the kids on her time if needed (like she's going out of state), and if you refuse she can then seek other childcare arrangements. I can't give you legal advice, 1 because I'm not a lawyer, who you should go speak to. And 2 because I don't know what's in your custody agreement on fi…
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/21 01:25 PM
1

You first have to file intent to divorce. Do it together (joint filing) if possible that way you don't have to serve the other party. Write up any contract (you can google) that outlines the date which your finances are split and both sign it and bring it to the court under discovery. This will file a signed contract by both parties that outlines whatever date you want finances to be split. The court won't force a fight between you two if you both agree on things. They will be happy to collect f…
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/21 07:37 PM
2

Any CPA will help with asset division. Self filing worked well for me, my ex and myself felt and did the same, agreed on terms and signed a contract/parenting plan and split up during the process and both followed that contract without the courts involvement. When we filed we waited a month and a half then had our ISC, then a few weeks later sat down at a mediation both saying we agreed on this contract with copies, presented our financial declarations that the courts required, they made us wait…
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/21 06:22 PM
2

Everyone is different. You have to be honest with your feelings and do whats best for you. I got a divorce last year, amicable enough, one young kid. We both moved into our own place and dated a bit and found each other again recently and started something open, with tons of open and honest communication about how to navigate parenting regardless of what happens in our relationship. If my ex and I had during our marriage what we have now it might have worked out, but life is the way it is. I fin…
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/20 04:36 PM
2

This. You can just leave lol
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/20 07:50 PM
4

You are 22 and got married young. I did too, I got married around your age and was married 7 years. Had a kid as well. There's so many blessings in your situation that you cant yet see but will eventually see with age and experience. I dont mean to say that to take away the heartbreak and emotional toll this time in your life comes with, and for that Im deeply sorry. When you are so young, you change a lot. Its difficult to describe even WHO you are, and this takes varying time for everyone, but…
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/20 07:18 PM
8

I didnt give that speech exactly. But I do and probably always will love my ex. Our marriage had corroded into a toxic mess where we were both extremely unhappy, and she had fallen out of love with me, where I felt isolated and as a result pulled away from the marriage even more. She had been willing to stick it out but it had lasted almost 2 years, no intimacy, complete communication breakdown, and just hurt feelings. Counselling wasnt helping so we eventually sat down and I told her I wanted h…
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/20 07:00 PM
3

I dont know we can help here. People are all different with different motivations. The reasons people do things are normally emotional. He may just be distracted and honestly a POS. He may be guilty and trying to hide from it while building something new to replace what he self-sacrificed. Who knows. You are adults though, I'd say go to him and confront him and say you dont care whatever has happened in the past you want to be in his life, and point blank ask him what his motivations are, and se…
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/20 11:49 PM
5

Do whatever makes you happy. Be upfront and honest about it with yourself. Dont push yourself too hard and dont expect anything serious right off the bat. Its a grieving process for many, if not most. It gets easier with time. Much like losing a loved one (which is divorce in many cases) - you dont ever truly forget or simply stop thinking about them immediately but over time things get a bit easier and you focus on your current world with more clarity. Your marriage was a big event in your life…
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/20 12:58 PM
2

Yeah my ex does that but since they were work "friends" before and he was around the kid back then with my "permission" the court doesnt give a shit lol. I quote permission because it was never asked for or explicitly given but I tacetly allowed it. And I quote friends for obvious reasons heh.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/20 03:08 AM
5

Dating during divorce can get messy since you are still legally married until the divorce is final. Even without sex you will have to worry about claims of infidelity which in some cases doesn't affect the outcome much but in other cases affects the outcome greatly. Im not a lawyer but really thats who you should consult with before doing something that potentially puts you at a disadvantage in court.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/20 01:32 PM
5

Divorced guys guide to the universe lol. I agree with all of this. I started exercising, practicing hobbies, reading books (extreme ownership highly recommended) - ill add a book - meditations by marcus aurelius - saved my suicidal ass. Working out - great advice. Martial arts/combat - great advice. Better nutrition - great advice. Therapy - great advice. Meditation - great advice. Adding - For financials - read stock market for dummies, get a free app and start trading stocks during the day. Yo…
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/20 11:00 PM
6

I dunno our marriage was obviously failing for a long time. I just told her I was done working on it and started working on myself. Eventually after I started doing that she asked me if we should call it what it is and I agreed. I was done working on our marriage and getting nothing but pain in return. Your situation sounds different so nobody is gonna know how to help you
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/20 02:29 AM
4

Same boat man. Just working on myself and being patient. Dont rush anything. Talk normally and listen. Start conversations with "Hey, how are you" talk about interests and try to keep the focus on the other person. People love talking about themselves so if you just listen and add some things every now and then and stay honest to yourself and dont try to be something youre not, conversation is easy. If youre genuine and honest then youll make a connection based on those things. Quarantine has a …
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/20 03:50 PM
3

Think about your question. A ton of people are divorced and fine. How long is up to the person - some never get over it and some do very quickly. It also depends on the circumstance.
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/20 05:54 PM
2

Do it anyway for the giggles when they look at it like "the bastard retyped all of this?" Play games back - protect yourself first but its also worth it to dump some time into being difficult back. In my honest opinion.
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/20 01:04 AM
1

Depends on the person. Youll move on eventually
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/20 11:21 PM
4

She probably didnt. Ive dated a bit and it just doesnt stick with me because Im just enjoying being alone and selfish. Nothing wrong with being alone and selfish. Date when it feels right, dont if it doesnt, just do you and dont be too hard on yourself. Its healing time.
/r/Divorce_Men04/03/20 03:38 AM
1

Youre doing it. You ask how people get through it and its by doing the stuff you said you are doing. And time. Everyone grieves in their own way. You're right where you should be, dont beat yourself up.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/20 05:36 PM
3

Great post man. It took me a while to let go of the resentment for my ex but I came to the same realization. She just didnt like me, at all. We make better friends than we did married and now things are great. Angry at first but we are all human and all make mistakes and youre doing a really great job recognizing that in someone you were angry with and hurt by.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/20 01:36 AM
2

Stoicism is your friend. Read reflections by marcus aurelius. Or listen. Promise itll help
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/20 02:29 AM
2

Good to hear
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/20 12:51 AM
4

Shes not your wife anymore. Time to talk to a therapist about reevaluating the relationship you have with this woman. She is the mother of your children you will know her forever. Better sooner than later. Going on the aggressive over stuff isnt the best option ever. Just stay quiet, document texts, record conversations, just collect data. Be a good father and document it. All this stuff will help you in court if the divorce gets messy.
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/20 12:45 AM
3

Emotional beating sucks but you can get through it I wouldnt move out yet, if you can tolerate it. But I know suicidal thoughts hit me more than once during that time and if your situation makes you seriously want to kill yourself then do whatever you need to do to get out of the situation and deal with the consequences later.
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/20 12:44 AM
3

I lived with my ex wife for a bit. Slept on the couch. If you guys are okay and not fighting all the time its alright. If youre fighting then being there for the little ones is being offset by the environment they are in. I discussed a lot with my ex during that time about how we would move forward and both maintain a healthy and greater than 50% presence in our son's life. She moved out first (which can be beneficial financially depending on a lot that Id recommend a lawyer to walk you through)…
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/20 12:40 AM
3

If this becomes habitual get some help for depression. Sometimes these life events can throw us into depressive cycles that dont just clear up on their own. But yknow, a day off never hurt anybody. Just rest and recover and get back to it tomorrow.
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/20 12:50 AM
2

Its definitely a greiving process. But its also an opportunity.
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/20 12:46 AM
1

You dont have to tell anybody. Its your life. But yeah. You can call people you love and tell them whats going on in your life. You dont have to explain in detail, just as much as youre comfortable with. You may be surprised the support you get.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/20 11:52 AM
3

Youve got to pick yourself up and move on. From this story she desparately needs some serious help and she isnt getting it from you and it doesnt seem like you can do anything to get her help. The only thing she may need is to be involuntarily committed and put on some meds. But that will likely do nothing for your marriage. This story sucks man and Im sorry to hear it. Sorry people in your life dont believe you. I believe you, but I dont know you. And divorce is tough but eventually you will be…
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/20 01:23 AM
2

This is pretty common. I went thru a honeymoon phase with my ex after we decided to divorce. At least in my experience its not meaningful change. But my experience isnt the end all of experiences, I dont know your wife. I just wouldnt bet on this attitude shift being as drastic as it is to last forever, if I were in your position.
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/20 07:56 PM
1

I mean I obviously just brought it up with family and close friends, and whether or not it came up organically, they understood I needed to talk about it/tell them. Coworkers would ask and now its a bit of gossip enough that most people I work with know and sometimes they ask me about it. I dont feel like I need to tell other people unless they ask specifically. I also dont feel the need to lie or not answer if someone asks. I just told them what was going on. After the divorce it sometimes come…
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/20 12:27 AM
1

Yeah man let yourself think about it. Then one day it wont bother you anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/20 01:56 PM
6

Yeah you can probably reduce spousal maintenance for that, but not much else. Something weird happens in divorce Im convinced (knowing and seeing a few very closely and going through it myself) where like... maybe not all but a huge majority of women decide to just completely throw away every aspect of their personality that gave them any redemption in another person that wouldve caused you to marry them in the first place. Its probably perspective where red flags are just obvious now and they w…
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/20 12:53 AM
2

This is the way
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/20 06:08 AM
8

Me too bro I was like "wtf?" While reading OPs post and I dont know anything at all. So... good luck to you too tho
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/20 03:01 AM
2

Yeah I mean ive been able to find some physical stuff to occupy me temporarily, but havent really actively pursued that either. I find I need a fairly small amount of sex if Im otherwise mentally healthy. I craved more when I was emotionally drained and depressed in my marriage, because it was something to do and gave me endorphines which I dont think I was getting otherwise. Even exercise affects me differently outside of a relationship than within an unhealthy one. Its strange but Id much rath…
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/20 11:52 PM
6

Lol yeah the blacksmithing will be interesting. Just saw the class and thought "why not?" So im doing it. But yeah man enjoy your freedom. No need to make permanent decisions about your future, really ever. Just focus on the present and what youre doing that brings you joy.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/20 03:36 PM
6

I dunno I doubt ill get married again but if I happen to meet someone great Id consider a relationship. Im just not actively looking. You do you man, its all okay. My thing since the divorce has been self improvement. Ive been learning to cook well and healthy, Ive been taking classes of things that interest me (got an intro to blacksmithing on wednesday for fun), and doing things that interest me. I have no need for a relationship but if something just finds me passively im not going to push it…
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/20 02:42 PM
3

Theres a good chance you will pay her money despite the abuse. That said, Im super happy for you getting out of the situation. I lived with my ex wife for a few months while proceedings started. I spent very little time at home and the time I did spend I spent with my kid. And I slept on the couch and refused to discuss the divorce with her specifically, apart from discussing rationally about our feelings etc about things in general and our need to discuss agreement on parenting terms. We ended …
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/20 01:52 AM
1

Great post man. Im in the in between stage, emotionally (and luckily got away financially scott free - similar to how I was before, with just a few drawbacks, due to a better job offer during the divorce process that left me with about the same amount of money I was making before). But glad to hear the positivity. Its important through the process.
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/19 04:11 AM
5

There may be. If she represented a party and advised them for her own benefit and you can prove it, then yes. The difficulty is proving it... need an attorney
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/19 11:29 PM
2

Holy fuck man. I dont have any advice for you but holy shit.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/19 01:55 AM
2

Hey, from a fellow addict (and that having a lot to do with my marriage ending), thats the thing that sticks out in your story. 1) you try to quit but still do. Thats not quitting 2) blaming her for perpetuating your behaviors It sounds like you recognize you have a substance abuse issue, which is super positive actually. But now you have to put in an insane amount of hard work to deal with it. And, on top of that, you have the added stress of divorce. I honestly feel for you. But it sounds like…
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/19 08:39 PM
2

You dont enforce morality, at least in my opinion. With her, she is free, its time to develop a new relationship as parents, and leave the marriage relationship behind. If you feel like you were a doormat, read up on assertiveness and train yourself to be assertive without going on the aggressive, and dont put up with her shit, I would highly recommend going to a therapist if you can afford it. You CAN enforce, thru court, the parenting plan if you have evidence she is violating it. But dont go …
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/19 03:12 PM
1

Sorry to hear man. Fight for a strict parenting plan, file asap, and collect any evidence shes violating if she is. Include things like appropriate behavior and conversation with kids. Dont distrust your kids because you distrust your ex. Keep your head up. Definitely sounds like the right decision for your family.
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/19 02:06 PM
2

I, like many others, entered a fling with my ex wife soon after divorce proceedings. Its done nothing but complicate things. But I still dont regret it. Thats a person you spent a load of time with and knows everything about you, familiar. Dont fall into the trap of remembering just the good things. There was a reason you split up. And it seems like youre finding out again. Focus on yourself, find your center. Become a solid human being. Become the person you wished you were in that relationship…
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/19 12:56 AM
4

Dont know. Attorney can help. It depends on how much more/less you make than your ex wife. Custody shouldnt have been so one sided unless one of you was unfit or you just agreed to less custody, in my non-attorney opinion. Regarding finances, there should be a child support calculator online for your state that can get you a rough idea how much you should be on the hook for based on custody arrangements and your pay vs her pay. What you are paying doesnt sound like child support but an itemized …
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/19 04:30 PM
1

My separation quickly led to divorce. It was best overall. Positives??? Im not trapped in a prison of self hatred with someone who is extremely selfish and doesnt care one iota about me, and Im free to express myself and live my life.
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/19 01:04 AM
4

Oh fuck my geography sucks lmfao
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/19 01:01 AM
0

What the fuck state is Wv
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/19 12:11 AM
3

Mine was pretty simple and over in 4 months. In and out. So like I said much different. A young kid between us but it went pretty smoothly. The difficulty im having now is keeping my composure with his astoundingly selfish mother so as not to aggrivate an already precarious situation with my young'un, while also maintaining a strict compliance with the terms of the divorce. Its only been finalized for a few weeks now and shes already violated the parenting plan once (to my knowledge) with the ex…
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/19 01:18 AM
3

Its tough man. My journey is a lot different than yours but with some stark similarities. Namely using your hard work against you. I sacrificed a lot for my family. Hell, I still do. And it hurts like hell to have that thrown in your face like it was a mistake. Keep on keeping on. The only true control you have is your reactions and your perserverence. Things are finally settling down in my life now but it sure sucks that someone I once cared for, loved, and respected just totally threw all that…
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/19 12:07 AM
1

Im not religious so I understand motivations differ person to person. But for me, I didnt really have any reason to get married the first time. Turns out I was right (worst I told you so ever). Now I dont think there could be any amount of motivation to do it again. Though in Colorado, common law is recognized and if I found myself living with another woman for long enough, she could force a divorce even without being married. Though it's apparently more diffiult in that case. I honestly think i…
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/19 07:36 PM
5

Seeking an amicable divorce is smart if you can, but if the relationship has devolved so that you refer to her as a c**t then it might be time to lawyer up. Divorce can be really painful and difficult or it can be relatively painless, no matter what state youre in. It depends on the people and what process you take. Dont have any advice specific to your state.
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/19 02:15 PM
4

I had a similar situation with my ex. Lived in the same place for about 6 months, me on the couch. The divorce has been amicable and it was a bit more of a collective decision but it was for the same reason, she didnt just not love me, she didnt like me. She just moved out a few weeks ago. Although leading up to it was tough and custody changing is tough (see my little one less than Id like) - after the move was a huge relief. Youll get through it. I went and found a therapist, Id recommend that…
/r/Divorce_Men26/09/19 12:46 AM
1

I dont see myself for the forseeable future. I wouldnt recommend against it for anyone else though, but im sure ill teach my son that waiting to get married for a long time is probably a smart move if he wants to. Nothing wrong with being in a long term committed relationship for years, and the consequences of a bad decision are lessened in many but not all cases. I dont have any desire to be married again. I have desire to be in long term committed relationships in the future though. Just not a…
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/19 11:59 PM
1

Like anyone will tell you here: talk to a divorce attorney. I dont know if youre out of state or your ex is, I dont know what kind of divorce it is, I dont know if its an annulment, I dont know anything about your situation except very few details you shared. Even if I did know all of the above, I am not a divorce attorney. So my advice would be about as worthless to you as the homeless guy's outside the convienence store near you. Hope this helps.
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/19 12:48 AM
1

Separation is just divorce without the title... unless you forsee reconciliation then its better to just go through with the divorce. I dont know how easy it is to prove verbal or emotional abuse, especially as a male. I would assume its extremely difficult, youd be going for an at-fault divorce, and I wouldnt put my eggs in that basket in your position. The best solution to the abuse is to leave it and cut your losses, unfortunately. But im NOT an attorney and I dont know the extent of your sit…
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/19 03:00 AM
1

She will get alimony because you are the current only source of income. Initiating the divorce may also come into play. How high it is depends on the income disparity (read: how much you make vs her income of $0-$5k).
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/19 01:57 AM
1

Custody will likely be split if theres no external factors that make that a bad idea. Your work schedule is gonna suffer with kids on your own, because you will be responsible for drop off/pick up from childcare. I have the same issue with working a lot. If you have the money you can outsource/hire an in home childcare. Thats really up to your personal situation. But figure out how youre gonna handle your half of the custody so she cant point to scheduling conflicts as a way to swing for more cu…
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/19 01:53 AM
1

Im sorry to hear that man. You have solidarity in me for sure. Sounds like youre on the right path to eject yourself from a situation that brings you real pain and harm. Which is good for you. Much love and good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/19 01:42 AM
3

Personally its what you want man. I would prefer to stay in the country if it was my option.
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/19 09:32 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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