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ConstanceVigilante Archive

View 6 posts and 308 comments by ConstanceVigilante on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Does this sub have rules about AI?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 02:50 AM
1

20 years of living There’s the mismatch right there 😆
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 03:11 PM
2

I absolutely adore your flair and the series it comes from. Sci-fi nerds unite!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 02:07 PM
2

I guess it’s a matter of what “hooking up” really means. I tried hooking up with mostly-unknown men I went on a couple dates with, and it didn’t do anything for me. It’s a lot better with close intimate friends who I do activities/spend a lot of non-sexual time with as well. Some intellectual connection is a baseline requirement for me. I would need that intellectual connection to be very strong and seamless to commit. Haven’t found that so far!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 02:04 PM
34

All of a sudden men get shit for being too "nonchalant" (with quotations marks) I have never heard a woman complain about this when it comes to clothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 05:56 PM
2

I think all “objectification” level objections are basically completely null and void unless the person being objectified is physically having their personal space or consent violated. Policing actions is fair game. But you can’t control what people think. Having a thought is not dehumanization. Also, noticing someone’s body is in no way erasing their mind automatically. A man can notice a woman’s tits without concluding that she must be stupid or beneath him. That simply does not follow.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 03:43 PM
14

Lol, I’ll bite. I had my first relationship at 18 with a guy I went to college with, but we were from different states, and were sent back home after a year because of Covid. It lasted 3 years on and off. I had two friends I hooked up with on the side when we’d broken up. He did as well, and we eventually called it off for good. I only really count it as a year long, since the next two years were long distance. After I graduated, I started working professionally and got my MS side by side. Tried…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 03:25 PM
2

Read the post carefully. It’s not just about being providers. It’s about wanting to be “genuinely desired” by the woman while also wanting her to be dependent. The men who don't care about a woman's career are fine being the provider. Are they also fine with the woman not being truly attracted to them, dead bedrooms, beta buxxing or whatever else the Red Pillers complain about? These complaints wouldn’t be as widespread if men who “want to be providers” (at least the ones online) were generally …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/25 01:48 PM
5

That isn’t really an inconsistency or error because my post isn’t describing or even claiming to be about the choices of women or liberal women. I don’t think women should be expecting men to make more money or provide for them either.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/25 01:40 PM
8

This is a common logic error. Let's unpack this carefully. Under "traditional gender roles": All men (and only men) are providers. All people need provision to survive. Men provide for themselves, and women are provided for by a man. So basically, that doesn't mean that no women will be attracted to their providers, but there will be two groups of women. Women who find a man they are attracted to, who is also a provider. Women who have to pick a man they aren't attracted to because they need a m…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/25 01:23 PM
6

This is an irrelevant rant that doesn't address the question.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/25 12:52 PM
28

It's not something I crave - I won't feel agitated or whatever if I go several months or even a year or two without sex. It takes a non-zero amount of effort to get hookups (yes, even as a woman) unless you use dating apps, which I really hate and will never download again. If it's with a total stranger, I don't imagine the sex itself will be particularly good. It's much easier (and probably more satisfying) to just occasionally imagine that some random attractive person I saw has whatever prefe…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/25 11:33 AM
102

There are many guys I’m physically attracted to and can see myself sleeping with, who I would not date or marry. I don’t really care for casual sex, so I never actually do it. That doesn’t mean the instinct isn’t there though.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 10:10 PM
3

Devils advocate means I like to take an adversarial, or contrarian, side of discussions even when I agree with the person. Exactly - so that should mean you're making a similar number of pro-Red Pill and pro-Blue Pill arguments on this sub, depending on who you're responding to. Why call yourself a "Red Pill Man"? I poke holes in bad takes from other red pillers often. That's not being a devil's advocate, that's just arguing with nuance instead of blind tribalism. If you think it's a bad take, y…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 09:03 PM
3

If you're a "devil's advocate", doesn't also claiming to be a "red pill man" defeat the purpose?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 08:55 PM
2

I asked her what makes her a great gf she said- she is ambitious, has a good career and is 'funny' Sounds fine to me. Maybe it wasn't what that specific man wanted. Some men would consider these qualities extremely desirable in a partner. Others wouldn't care or would consider them negatives. It seems as though people on here seem to not only think that women are a monolith, but also that men are a monolith. I also just straight up don't understand the whole "women's careers don't matter" perspe…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 03:02 PM
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If it is 95%+ of women, then either look for the 5% you want to date (know that they may not want to date you), or don't date anyone. Being single is a perfectly valid life choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 02:37 PM
2

I love how arguments on this sub look. “Women all find a different 20% of men attractive, it’s not the same” “No, I, a man, say you don’t. You all like the same men.” “…well, no. Here’s an example of a real life case where this has happened.” “But no! You all like the same men, I insist!” Negation of a statement is not an argument. This is just lazy and it’s really annoying to have to read through drivel like this with the hope that there’s an actual point being made somewhere in there, somehow.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 06:59 PM
10

Agreed. I always say men should exclusively go for independent women who don’t need financial support or expect men to provide. That completely avoids the “beta bux” situation. Also, women are literally doing the same thing. They stay single until they find a man they actually want. It always baffles me how so many people on here automatically assume that “single woman” = sleeping with Chad, in a situationship or FWB, etc. Sure, maybe a few single women do that, but the vast majority don’t. Sex …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 02:41 PM
8

Even you will say something along the lines of you want a man to have a certain amount of money. And be a certain amount of benefit to you Yeah, no. I’ve never even been on a date with a man who made more money than I do. There are almost no men like that in my age group and generally speaking a man’s income is not something I care about at all. Get to know the people around you before you make assumptions.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 04:42 PM
16

If that’s the attitude these men have, it makes sense that the only women that end up with them are the ones who weaponize sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 03:37 PM
14

Wilt Chamberlain fucked 20000 women. People like David Bowie and Mick Jagger are know to have slept with hundreds to thousands of women. All he did was say: "Wanna fuck?" almost every woman working in Hollywood had slept or tried to sleep with Brad Pitt. Knowingly dating a man who sleeps around and hooking up with such a man once are different. Fucking once takes 20 minutes, lol. You can't equate that to women wanting to be in relationships with men who they have to share.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 02:41 PM
4

That’s the way to do it! Really almost all these bitter men’s problems will be completely solved if they just follow this.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 02:17 PM
4

Why are you trying to filter women for vague and hazy things like "genuine attraction", fish for their sexual past, or whatever? Just filter for the woman's income. It's that simple. Don't date or marry women who don't make their own money and support themselves. If you go for an independent woman who doesn't expect providing or financial favors, the only reason she could possibly be with you is because she enjoys the sex and companionship.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 02:03 PM
18

Why are men marrying women who do this?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 01:53 PM
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Still not the same. Cuckoldry is a fetish. Open relationships are not cuckoldry, no matter who sleeps around more.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 04:31 AM
12

Do you really think that the number of women who “married themselves” accounts for the number of fewer women getting married these days? Have millions of women been marrying themselves? The vast majority of women who aren’t getting married anymore are opting out by choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 04:27 AM
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From my understanding, polyamory goes both ways in the vast majority of relationships (both partners sleep with other people). Cuckoldry is the practice of one partner (usually the woman) sleeping with other people because the other partner (usually the man) gets off on it. So no, different ideas.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 04:13 AM
2

She can’t be “used to it” by this point if she’s been with one man long enough to marry him. Marriage implies being in a committed relationship at least for a few years.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/25 04:02 AM
1

Most men (ages 22-35) I know are engineers. They all make decent money, most of them are not religious, they're average looking and pretty introverted, sometimes awkward. Almost all of these men either have girlfriends or are single by choice. Most pair up with women of similar physical attractiveness and their income/standard of living is also within the same ballpark. In my circles specifically, many are dating slightly older women (2-3 year age gap). I can only think of a couple of guys who s…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 03:21 PM
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I'm currently not looking for a relationship because I live in a city I really dislike, and want to hold off on dating until I move somewhere I plan to be long term. 1) I tried apps in the past and had no issues getting matches. Met some cool people, attractive and interesting. I'd have probably liked them if we were acquaintances/met through friends or socializing IRL. But something about the very fact that the dates were off an app made the whole thing feel forced and just lame. I gave up on a…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 02:57 PM
2

Financial woes are not valid, because the poorest countries have the most children. This is because these economies rely heavily on manual labor (which having more kids will supply), mostly don't have any formal retirement programs (kids take care of the parents in old age, as a social expectation) and lower life expectancy. It is a financially wise decision for families in those countries to have more kids. Meanwhile, in the West, children are a time and money sink and having more kids doesn't …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 04:11 AM
1

…no romance for most women either. You do realize that the numbers in the population are equal, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 08:52 PM
3

Human nature. We don't pick what turns us on. I can't just turn around and say "from now on I am attracted to women who wear yellow dresses" and poof suddenly any chick with a yellow dress makes me woody stand up. It just doesnt work that way. That doesn’t follow because you aren’t being asked to become attracted to to women you aren’t already attracted to. You’re simply being asked to filter more. This advice is already given to women. Women have to filter out fuckboys who will pump and dump th…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 07:01 PM
2

Males: Almost entirely based on physical appearance. That’s what I’m saying, what’s stopping men from being more picky and also looking for a combination? If you think she’s pretty but she’s broke and unemployed, turn her down. Maybe she’s bored or even hungry. She may already like you or you already have 0% chance. Why do you want to waste your money on a woman who’s on a date with you just because she’s bored or hungry? Because you think she might come back for another free meal if you pay for…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 06:44 PM
2

Would be akin to telling a woman who's not very attractive to never wear make up and never wear dresses that accent her best features. Not true. The equivalent to this would be telling men not to go to the gym or wear well-fitting clothes. Whether you like it or not we are all apes and our sexual selection is instinctual Yes, the fact that the two people in question went on a date in the first place means that the animalistic attraction criteria are already met. Be a human being with some self r…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 06:02 PM
7

That in the past most of our work was grueling manual labor. So guys with bigger muscles tended to be more productive. On top of that our pecking order was still fairly rudimentary. Guy with biggest muscles on top of the hierarchy, which was usually men. I agree almost completely. Women's "liberation" didn't come from feminism. It came from industrialization and the subsequent transition to a service-based economy, where most jobs don't require manual labor. In our current workforce, intellectua…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 05:28 PM
27

Most men just don't want to admit that they're not attractive enough for most women who they don't know to want to date them at first sight - even though this isn't even a new phenomenon. For decades and even centuries, communities were small and tight-knit and women did know the men they ended up marrying beforehand. So naturally, coping strategies abound. ("Women won't date men because of X!")
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 03:48 PM
6

I agree. The fact that they lied is more of a problem than what the lie was about.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 03:23 PM
9

For the same reason men get into relationships with women who don't sleep with them, claim that men are trash, or only use them for money. (and then complain) So many people of both sexes would rather be in any relationship than stay single. That said, if someone's sexual past (irrespective of gender) bothers you even AFTER marriage, that's something to examine. Being averse to a high body count makes sense in the context of being wary of the person cheating, but if you're already married to the…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 03:09 PM
2

Let's see. Friends, family, social events, cultural celebration, travel. Hobbies, art and music, entertainment, books, movies, shows and video games. Careers, self-improvement, passion projects, gym, sports, meditation. Humor, platonic companionship, volunteering, charity, helping other people. I can think of many, many worthwhile ways to fill your life which don't need a romantic partner at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 02:58 PM
–

It’s a thought experiment. It’s not supposed to be realistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 03:31 PM
1

League and standards are the same. And just like how you reject men who don't meet your standards (aren't in your league), the men who DO meet your standards likewise see you as being below their league, so they will only use you for sex, but never give you commitment. This logic falls apart when you factor in situations where people don’t want each other for different reasons. Let’s say that I (an average woman) only date men who live in my city, and reject anyone who I’ll have to drive far awa…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 02:21 PM
3

it's simple math in realizing that everyone won't get what they want. This rests on the assumption that everybody has to end up in a relationship. In reality, some people will get what they want and others will remain single.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 02:01 PM
11

Why would they stop having sex and then divorce their husband? Men are not suggesting women do that. They are suggesting women actually love their husbands. Shocker i know Agreed. Which is why pushing for women to “lower their standards” and marry men they don’t love is not a good thing. First off, that would be catastrophic. For a couple of generations, sure. But people have said the same thing about the population explosion. And it did suck in a lot of ways, but we adapted. And we will adapt t…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/25 04:01 PM
6

Look up the percentage of men vs women who reproduced in the past. Something like 50-70% of men didn’t reproduce at all for most of history. This is the model on which the human species has evolved. The population is likely to fall for a few decades and then stabilize at a point significantly below the level it is at now. The baby boom of the 1950s was an anomaly, not the baseline. That being said, women these days can and do lower their standards to have kids. And then the red pillers complain …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/25 03:29 PM
3

19? He’s probably in college. Dating apps are worthless and a guy on a college campus surrounded by women his age absolutely doesn’t need one. Make friends through classes, school clubs, neighboring dorms or apartments, etc. Get a relationship through those friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:55 PM
1

It doesn’t bother me if someone has these opinions of a generalized caricature of “women” because no one is interacting with “women.” They are interacting with individual women. If they assume that all individual women are exactly the typical way the Red Pill describes them or whatever and preemptively judge them before they get to know them personally, that’s where I have problems with it. I think that if someone does truly believe in all of these “manosphere” ideas while still keeping an open …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/24 05:42 AM
2

I've always been very feminine looking and presenting physically (long hair, feminine way of dressing, petite/skinny build, not athletic or sporty) but I tend to be slightly more hard-headed and logically driven that what most people would expect from a traditionally feminine woman. I work as a software engineer, and have a lot of male-dominated "nerdy" interests like RPGs, anime and strategy games. My other hobbies are more androgynous to stereotypically feminine-leaning - drawing, reading, mus…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 04:50 AM
–

Is this not happening already? How are those women “not failing” currently?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/24 02:10 AM
12

They are more happy than they would be if they were married to guys they didn’t find attractive. They clearly want a relationship but aren’t willing to admit that they don’t qualify for the men they think they do, or make any changes Then they don’t want a relationship enough to settle for a man below their standards. They would rather be single than settle. That is their right. They’ve earned dying alone and I have zero sympathy for them There’s nothing to “earn.” If they can get relationships …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 03:04 PM
3

It’s one thing to be born to never have enthusiastic sex. It’s another to have to marry and live with a constant reminder that you’re an inferior article to the men who were. Why do these men still marry these women then? Why not say no and just stay single?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 02:41 PM
6

to encourage realistic standards How? What terms or behaviors do you suggest targeting by applying social pressure to women?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 05:55 AM
24

What kind of market correction and what kind of compromise?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 01:32 AM
62

Men are almost universally sick of women’s entitlement and delusion. Completely mediocre women feel owed top tier men, viewing even men more desirable than them as inferior What do you think is the solution to this, if not forcing women to be with men they don’t want? (even if it is the result of unrealistic standards)
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 01:23 AM
33

Because men see how fast a woman is willing to sleep with them one single time as the sole factor that determines the woman’s judgment of their attractiveness. It doesn’t matter how much you like him, how much time, money or effort you spend on him, or even how much sex you have with him. Men are not looking for that. It’s only how quickly you do it the first time. That’s why according to most men, the guys who women meet and sleep with only once are the “winners” and the ones who get into commi…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/11/24 04:50 AM
2

Why don’t you just ask these women how much they like you instead of jumping to conclusions? Also, who is volunteering information like “I slept with this guy in one day, but I’m making you wait”? How do you even learn about this?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/11/24 04:40 AM
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Women want men just as much as men want women (the question/issue is which men they want.) This is a logically self-contradictory statement. If women wanted men enough, they would be okay with men who aren’t in the top %, if they couldn’t get the top %. Instead, what you see in reality is that women would rather stay single if they can’t be with the top % of men. Men don’t do this. Obviously, men also want the top % of women ideally. But they do just want women enough to be okay with women who a…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 06:06 PM
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Depends on what “outcome” means. I’m not sure if this is a Red Pill virtue signaling post about how we should all become subservient trad wives or the men we date will keep leaving us - if by “outcome” you mean the fact that our past relationships ended, that’s exactly what it is, and I advise women to ignore this post. If you’re talking about the relationship dynamic and roles we played in the relationship, I personally would generally want to keep the same dynamic I had with my ex-boyfriend. M…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 06:53 PM
1

Lol. It’s just a joke.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 06:47 PM
7

Exactly. We do approach men. We just approach our friends, not strangers.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 11:25 PM
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There are women OK with dating short men, or making more than their partners I would be shocked if there are women actively seeking out men with all the characteristics I mentioned in the 2nd list (not simply 1 or 2). This is a very good point, and I really don’t understand why this subreddit hyper-focuses on income alone as a proxy for masculinity or what women look for in a partner. Personally I would love to date a guy who let me be the main source of income. I make more money than almost any…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 12:40 AM
6

how lonely an average guy is While this might be true, the idea that the ability to get sex from random people at will makes women feel less lonely is just simply not true. I do think that women on the whole are not usually as lonely as men. But the reason for that is that women tend to form closer and more intimate platonic friendships (with both other women and with men) and maintain closer family relationships as well. It’s not because of sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 09:50 PM
3

I’m not promoting polygamy. I’m saying we are headed towards a world where the entire population just doesn’t necessarily pair up and get married at all. I think the percentage of women who are settling is much lower than that, but that’s not the point I’m trying to make here - so let’s say your numbers are correct. The 55% of women you mention who are “getting married but not to their first choice” are only getting married because men are willing to be settled for by them. And most of those cou…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 05:46 AM
7

There is a form of liberation if one decides that he is dealt a set of cards that exclude onself from life, In a society that marginalizes and excludes large numbers of men. They are just men. They built the patriarchy. They deserve to die lonely without cats. Right? It’s not just men. Equal numbers of men and women in the population mean that most women will also be “marginalized” in the end as well, unless we actually start practicing polygamy. (If ending up alone is your definition of margina…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 02:39 AM
16

Because they’re not actually afraid of paternity fraud. It’s just an excuse. But women can’t use “we’ve evolved to chase Chad” as an excuse, because that hurts the incels’ feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 02:28 AM
1

Usually commercial STEM jobs make the most money. If you’re an engineer, it’s heavily correlated with age. I’m a software engineer in my early twenties right now, making six figures. I would probably be making 175k before I’m 30. I live in the Midwest and not in a big city. If you’re a doctor or generally specialize in something in the medical or pharmaceutical field, school takes longer and the average age of graduation is later than most other majors. But you start off making a lot of money pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 12:45 AM
14

Red pill logic. If she’s 30+, she’s been “run through” and has a high body count, which is bad. Why is it bad? Every evo-psych spewing “coach” in the manosphere will swear up and down that men have evolved to dislike women with high body counts, in order to prevent paternity fraud. But when you ask them why women chase after attractive Chads in their youth, the fact that women have evolved to only find attractive men attractive, that only ~20% of men have reproduced for most of history is not re…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 12:27 AM
8

From my perspective, women have an easier time dating than men. Men have higher physical security and women have higher social security. Most other aspects of life are not really different by gender in the modern Western world. I think the main reason men are not given “support” during puberty is because they don’t menstruate.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 09:25 PM
2

I don’t care at all about being approached. I will almost never say yes if it’s coming from a stranger, but it doesn’t bother me at all. In my experience men have generally not been persistent after they got rejected, and have almost always taken it really well. I usually forget those types of interactions by the end of the week.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/24 10:44 PM
1

I disagree. The best way to do this is to actually make raising children a job for both men and women, rather than keeping it a job for women and adding a monetary incentive. The discourse on this subject is still 99% about women, which is the main problem. “Just pay women” “Make maternity leave free” “Make daycare free” The implicit assumption here is that in the end of the day, childcare is primarily a woman’s responsibility. It’s either women or external caregivers. What about men? If men wan…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/24 12:26 PM
1

Make friends with the girl who showed up with a boyfriend then. Or make friends with the boyfriend. Maybe they can set you up with one of her friends. You have to network more and make more friends if you want these things to happen. I get where it’s coming from — putting themselves out there socially doesn’t come naturally to too many men and the desire to step outside your comfort zone isn’t as strong when you can’t expect success directly. But being too focused on getting immediate results (“…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/24 06:46 PM
1

Such a large part of this is creating and maintaining a social network. Here’s an example of something I experienced personally which just goes to show the stark difference I see between men and women in how they deal with forming social groups. A couple of weeks ago, I went to a baseball game for a work event. I was by myself, but one of my coworkers brought his girlfriend. I ended up sitting next to the two of them, and another male coworker who was there too (all of us are in our early 20s). …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/24 06:32 PM
4

A prerequisite would be knowing the person beforehand. Strangers don’t interest me at all. If a stranger approached me though, I would turn him down politely. I don’t think women should get offended at being approached by strangers as long as it’s done respectfully.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 02:23 PM
6

these same women were more than willing to sleep with handsome men in a short period of time Yes, because sleeping with someone takes 30 minutes. It makes total sense to pick someone to sleep with solely based off of looks. They aren’t willing to start relationships with those men, though. Don’t men work the same way when picking women they’re willing to sleep with, but not commit to?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 02:10 PM
1

Some people will say I lean red, others blue or purple or whatever. The “pill” discussion I see online has definitely played a role in helping me break down and eliminate any double standards I might have internalized about dating. As a result I refuse to let men pay for me on dates and make it a point to approach guys I like. I also refuse to let anyone provide for me in any capacity, and generally look and dress traditionally feminine and don’t sleep around. However, what I ultimately desire i…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/24 04:00 PM
1

Self improvement changes a man’s dating prospects. Self improvement with the sole purpose of attracting women does not.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/24 05:43 PM
1

So, we're supposed to intentionally do things outside our normal routine so we can meet women, but also pretend we aren't looking for a girlfriend. And this is the exact problem with the way many men interpret that advice. “Don’t go with the intention of finding a girlfriend” doesn’t mean “pretend you aren’t trying to find a girlfriend”. It means to only do the hobby or activity if you enjoy it (don’t do it at all if you don’t find enjoyment in it beyond meeting women) but try to get into more t…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/24 07:15 PM
3

Lol. Grow out your hair and don’t make that face. Maybe work out a bit. You’re literally completely fine, I don’t think anyone would describe your face as unattractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 06:10 PM
2

Societally normalize multiple men “sharing” a woman. I have a friend like this. She has 3 men dating her. They all know about the others and accept it. All three of them are below average looking, but they can easily find a partner who is willing to be with them this way. This fixes all the problems — men will have a much easier time finding partners, and less women will be taken. It might even make women “work harder” to get men to like them and the complaints of female entitlement coming from …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 05:03 PM
2

I don’t understand how this follows. Are you dying without a partner?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/24 10:15 PM
1

When men talk about their gym routines and workouts. I just straight up don’t care.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/24 04:08 PM
4

A woman who is faced with a choice between a hot ditzy guy and a mediocre looking accomplished guy will almost always choose neither. Men might agree or disagree with each other on who to pick in this situation, but many won’t even consider “pick neither, stay single” as an option. That, imo, is the main difference between men and women’s attitudes towards dating these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/24 11:55 PM
–

She didn’t say anything about having men in her presence. She’s only talking about which men she would date. Why are you pissed off about her having unrealistic expectations about who she would date personally, even if she does? That’s her problem. If she can’t find anyone who will meet all her requirements, she can just stay single. Where do other people even come into the picture?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/24 01:46 AM
–

Apparently men only exist to serve them and must be making their life easier for the privilege of being in their presence. She is literally saying the opposite. She is saying that women would rather not have these men in their presence, because they exist to do other things beyond "serving" them. So the women will stay single and men are free to go do those things.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/24 01:23 AM
6

Stop trying to bait people with low effort proclamations like this, that’s not the point of this sub
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 09:30 PM
7

Lol, that’s not the mic drop moment you think it is. It’s still pretty much invalidating your entire premise. I love using red pill ideas as arguments against other red pill ideas…best way to prove that they’re all mutually contradictory (and thus full of shit)
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/24 06:39 AM
33

Remember to polish up your business card and make it the sexiest of the bunch. Reservations at Dorsia are a welcome bonus. Don’t bring out the chainsaw until she’s at your place.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/24 06:32 AM
3

No, it's because women don't have the social expectation to initiate. So they rarely have to spend time puzzling over "men's sexuality."
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/24 05:03 AM
9

Symmetrical face, In shape, competent etc. Sure...but is that even what you're complaining about? I highly doubt you think that women "don't make any sense" because they like those things. Your post isn't even talking about those things. So cursory things aside, different women have different preferences and opinions -- so you won't get the same advice from all of them. That's why "women don't make sense" when viewed as a monolith. Case closed.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/24 04:55 AM
11

It's almost as if "women" are all individual people with individual, differing opinions which won't make sense when viewed as a collective...because, oh right, they all came from different people.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/24 04:39 AM
12

Depends on the person’s temperament and the nature of the job the sole provider is doing. For the vast majority of jobs, being the sole provider is probably more difficult. But I find my cushy office job as an engineer much easier than I would find running after a couple of rowdy kids all day.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/24 12:36 AM
1

The “expectation” needs to come from the person who makes more. My income is somewhere in the top 2% for my age group. So just probabilistically, any guy I go on a date with makes less than I do. As a result I always pay in full (not just my half) on any date.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/24 01:55 PM
1

I am a more or less heterosexual woman, but out of these four options I would pick woman A if I could go for her. Man A and B are unattractive to me both physically and personality wise from these descriptions. Woman B is not physically attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/24 01:35 PM
3

My name is Yoshikage Kira. I'm 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/24 03:20 AM
–

I will say here though that from what I can see women have lower standards for physical appearance when they’re looking to date other women. It’s not just men who are less selective with women, it’s women too. I would hypothesize that bisexual women probably find about 40-50% of women attractive, but only ~20% of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/24 09:53 PM
1

You could invalidate almost all complaints of dating with this logic for either gender. Yes, and I think most of the complaints are stupid. The only time the complaints are legitimate is when someone deceives you, leading to a situation where the thing they agreed to do is not the thing they are actually doing. It’s legitimate for a woman to complain if men lie about wanting to commit to her just to get sex. It’s legitimate for men to complain if women go on dates with them just to get free meal…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/24 01:34 PM
1

We aren't talking about whether someone should be complaining about it though, we are talking about whether the concept of the "friend zone" exists. Well, sure. But its “existence” is then only relevant because of the complaints. The fact that it’s a problem is false and the criticism comes from people treating it like one. (Aka complaining) Anything can “exist” in that sense — I might as well start complaining because I’m not a billionaire. And I’ll get criticized for complaining about it, beca…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/24 01:19 PM
0

The difference is that “situationships” as a concept are a lot more grey unless someone makes it clear what they are. So this analogy only works if the “situationship” started with the man clearly telling the woman that their dynamic would be casual sex only. A lot of times, men lie about that to get sex or are not upfront about it, which is when women complain. If the men are upfront about it, women shouldn’t be complaining either. They always have the choice not to sleep with him. Friendships …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/24 11:06 AM
27

No, too vague. Don't tell me what they shouldn't do. What should they do? What does "not being delusional" entail?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/24 07:36 PM
9

How is trying to get a “practice girlfriend” zero effort though? If your goal is to put in zero effort, just don’t bother with trying to date or fuck anyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/24 07:26 PM
30

Ok, let’s say it is the women’s fault. What are you saying women should do in order to stop “experiencing hostility” from men who they reject?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/24 07:11 PM
0

Because most men are not independent.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/24 03:48 PM
11

Yes, and women also use other women as venting boards. It's not a function of attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/24 03:39 PM
8

He’s saying that your analogy falls apart because it’s not about the same thing. You’re talking about a situation where you sleep around with more attractive women knowing that they won’t commit to you, and not complaining. And then an average woman complains that you should be with her instead. He’s trying to say that this situation (with the genders flipped) isn’t exactly what happens in real life. In reality, 6/10 women sleep with more attractive guys (8s to 10s) and then they themselves also…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/24 06:16 PM
6

Finally, a logically consistent red pill argument. Great job not being a hypocrite.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/24 06:08 PM
1

I’m saying that it’s irrelevant whether or not I am into casual sex. Let’s say I am a woman who has casual sex. In this case, I will only be having casual sex with people who I don’t like enough to commit to, aka, if I like them only physically and not for any other reason. Or, I might be a woman who doesn’t have casual sex, in which case I will not have casual sex with anyone. In either case, if I like someone enough to want a commitment with them (as a combination of physical attraction and ot…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/24 06:00 PM
1

Also, it seems like you're assuming for some reason you're the one who didn't want the commitment, but the most common inference is the other person was the one who didn't want the commitment This makes no sense regardless of whether or not I am into casual sex with people I don’t want to commit to. If I do want a commitment with someone (if I really like them), I will not have casual sex with that person. (Or if I am not into casual sex I will not have casual sex with anyone at all). So whether…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/24 04:58 PM
3

If they’re attractive and still single at that age, chances are they don’t want kids themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/24 12:19 PM
1

I see. So backwards and foreign. If I sleep with someone once and don’t want a commitment, it’s usually because I don’t like them as much. If I want a commitment I want you more. I can’t imagine wanting to be objectified. But I guess some guys are more excited if women are “objectifying” them (if women only want them for sex) since they are not at all used to the feeling of being desired/appreciated for their body.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/24 12:00 PM
1

Most of the debate is about that alpha/betabux issue How much of this is actually tied to the "bux" part though? What if the woman doesn't need or expect the man she's now committing to to spend a penny on her, but does require that he commit to only her (in a relationship where both partners have their own separate finances) Are men usually complaining about having to commit to one woman, or are they complaining about having to spend money on her? (where previous guys didn't need to, or needed …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/24 01:41 AM
2

I’m not necessarily advocating this idea, but I will point out the fact that most people only talk about women when they address this issue. “Women don’t want kids anymore these days.” “We can incentivize women to have kids by paying them.” “We need to make sure women can catch up in the workforce after their maternity leave is over.” Why not men? I don’t have the data for this, but it does seem like men on the whole want kids more than women do these days. Normalizing single fathers, making it …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/24 02:05 PM
7

What does a woman’s desire to date someone have to do with her considering them human? Women don’t want to date their dad or brothers either. Does that mean they don’t consider them human?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/24 12:14 AM
-1

The “dynamics” are arbitrary and only inside the man’s head. If he finds the person he’s friends with attractive, they’re suddenly accused of “friendzoning” him. If not, they’re just a friend. A guy/a woman who is not attractive to the man in question, and a woman who is attractive to that man, can both meet and interact with him in exactly the same way. Still only the woman he finds attractive is accused of putting the man in the friend zone, due to a distinction that exists only in his head. T…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/24 06:21 PM
0

It’s funny how men never accuse other guys of “friendzoning” them. Men arbitrarily decide which people just became their friends, and which people somehow wronged them in the process by “friendzoning” them.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/24 02:55 PM
3

I agree that it happens to women too, but then why do you never seem to see them complaining about it? I think you just answered it yourself. Women don’t generally complain about rejection online the way men do. Many men conflate that with women never getting rejected at all. Personally, whenever I’ve gotten rejected I’ve always made sure that only a few close friends (if anyone) even knew about it, and also asked the guy doing the rejecting to keep it private — which they always did, out of con…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/24 07:31 PM
2

So…the husbands aren’t financially dependent on their employers then? Only the women?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/24 01:52 AM
-3

Women are pickier than men on dating apps. Women are naturally less visual than men in their attraction. Most women would date some of the men they don’t swipe right on on the apps, if they met in person and got to know them first. But if you only have pictures and a few cursory lines on your dating app profile, looks become pretty much the only thing to go off of and can’t be offset by personality. So the standards for looks get much higher.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/24 02:42 PM
1

but it still comes down to "Yes, express all of your emotions, but not too much" where "too much" is never known ahead of time. No. It’s not “don’t do it too much” in terms of how many details you give or how many problems there are. It’s “don’t do it exclusively with youtr partner, and don’t expect your partner to solve the problem for you”. When women talk about their feelings, they are usually just trying to talk about it with no real expectation that you will propose solutions to whatever is…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/24 12:18 AM
1

It’s not about women losing attraction for a man if he shares a certain extent or number of emotional problems. It’s more about how reliant the man is on his girlfriend/wife to be his exclusive emotional support (and sometimes even to solve those problems) If men don’t have other outlets for their emotional problems (such as friends/family), or even worse, if they won’t acknowledge any responsibility for their own problems, they make their emotional problems entirely the responsibility of their …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/24 08:58 PM
2

Will most men date “mostly anything”? That’s quite different from fucking someone once. Getting a 20 minute fucking session easily is not the same as getting a relationship easily.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/24 07:35 PM
3

You just said in the same comment that casual sex is easier for women, which is true. But how does that extend to dating being easier for women? That’s a big leap you’re making there.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/24 04:04 PM
2

The most common way of dating these days is using the apps I’m not sure about this honestly. Men do seem to be on the apps a lot. But a lot of women don’t use them. Tinder’s user base is like 75% male. A quick google search shows that Hinge (which is allegedly more relationship-focused than hookup-focused) is about 65% male. I’m surprised by how infrequently these numbers come up on this sub. Based off of this it looks like a lot more women (when compared to men) actually aren’t looking for part…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/24 03:00 PM
2

That’s a model, men don’t look like that irl. Not even “chads”. 10% of the male population does not look anything like that guy. The woman in that picture also looks older than 30, and looks deliberately “stripped down” to be very plain. Also, I highly doubt that guy would be sleeping with that girl.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/24 04:51 PM
1

All women are attractive in their 20s? No, that’s not what I said. I’m talking about the same women you were initially describing — the ones who sleep with chads in their 20s. These so called “average” looking women. They get chads because they are attractive. The average woman in her 20s is more attractive than the average man in his 20s. She is on par with an attractive man in his 20s. It equals out with age. That doesn’t mean that every single woman in her 20s is attractive. What about men in…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/24 03:53 PM
0

Those women do get with “average” men when they’re older. The whole “average women sleep with Chad in their 20s and won’t look at average men till they hit the wall and Chad no longer wants them” shtick makes no sense to me. “Chads” do want them when they’re in their 20s and broadly speaking neither party wants to commit at that age. So in their 20s, they are on par with the Chads in terms of attractiveness. When they age, their looks fade and they are on par (looks wise) with average men. And t…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/24 03:00 PM
6

no sex - > guy is hurt and resentful - > chores really have no meaning if there’s no longer any sex This makes no sense. Sex is a two person activity which is supposed to feel good emotionally and physically for both people doing it. If sex only benefited the man and was a chore for women, this would be solid reasoning. But you disprove that line of logic yourself, by saying this: If a man has to do something to “earn sex” again the relationship is pretty much over Nothing can fix a lack of attr…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/24 11:04 AM
15

The mistake is in the phrasing and the interpretation. Women don’t mean that chores->sex is a sort of transaction. There’s always an intermediate step there. No chores-> resentment-> no sex. Women don’t claim that you can put chores in and get sex out. They claim that the resentment will reduce if you do the chores. The sex part can also have other reasons influencing it — but not doing chores certainly isn’t helping your case. When someone says “Your wife resents you (meaning you don’t get sex)…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/24 10:06 AM
2

There are plenty of women who enjoy dark humor or even misogynistic jokes. You just can't open with one before you know the person well. I personally love inappropriate or racist/sexist humor, as long as it goes both ways. I don't think anything is off the table when you're joking about it. It's just about balance. Make some anti-men jokes too and the anti-women ones won't seem offensive. People are all different. Some will share your sense of humor and others won't. This isn't a gendered issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/24 05:10 PM
2

The solution to this, then, is for men to raise their standards and also learn to be happy alone. By your own admission women are fine being single if they can’t get a “top 10% man”, so why should the men settle for a “less than a top 10%” woman who doesn’t want them anyway?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/24 10:56 PM
23

Dating apps don’t “work” because 1) they have like 80% men using them and 20% women, so the women who are there can “afford” to pick only the most attractive guys simply because of the imbalance in numbers, and 2) when there is nothing to quantify someone’s desirability off of besides looks and a few isolated lines on a profile, the importance of looks skyrockets. Most women would date some of the men who they don’t swipe on on the apps, if they meet them in real life and get to know them first.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/24 04:05 PM
8

Because obviously if you disagree with something, it means that you think the exact opposite is 100% correct and true. Didn’t you know that when you say men can be toxic and rude sometimes, you’re implying that women can never ever do anything wrong and that men are always to blame?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/24 01:29 AM
6

This: in reality an attractive and socially competent toxic piece of shit will have no trouble dating Does not imply this. Being a terrible person has no impact on your ability to get laid, get married and start a family, and be a valued member of society There’s also the possibility that being toxic is a negative trait which is often “made up for” by attractiveness. So it’s wrong to assume that it has “no impact” on dating success. Also, “being a valued member of society” is only tangentially r…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/24 01:16 AM
10

splitting the bill on the first date = no more chance Ok, but how many women actually say this? I’ve pretty much exclusively heard men say that women say this. Then they get responses from 10 different women who don’t agree and don’t claim this, which they blatantly ignore and dismiss so they can keep echoing this back and forth, despite tons of contrary evidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/24 03:36 PM
2

Now she thinks the friendship wasnt real lol. Fuck this. Have you been avoiding her after she rejected you romantically? Or have you still been acting like a friend, the way you did before you confessed? People generally won't assume this unless you grow distant after the rejection, because that kind of proves that the friendship wasn't genuine. I've confessed feelings to male friends who didn't feel the same way before. I've also had male friends confess their feelings for me, and I did not rec…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/24 06:38 PM
–

because they appeal to women Of all the people in this conversation, you are the only non-woman and the only person who seems to be looking at these posts. Based off of this sample set at least, they don't appeal to women. They do seem to appeal to you though. Unless I'm misgendering you.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/24 06:25 PM
8

So essentially you’re claiming that non-egalitarian relationships are not egalitarian even when people claim that they are. That doesn’t imply that there are NO relationships which are actually egalitarian.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/24 06:23 PM
0

There are other reasons this dynamic can fail. It’s not just because “women date up” and are always on the lookout for a richer guy. For example, it can happen because women get frustrated when their husbands refuse to pick up their share of domestic work even when they earn less. As in the case with my parents, my mom makes more money than my dad, but she was never ever off the hook for housework or chores. The expectation was that she did both. Growing up, I’ve seen several friends whose moms …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/24 01:57 PM
4

You’re proving my point — men already know that looks matter and that going to the gym matters. Why should women tell them that? assumption about his lack of personality There’s no such assumption. How does advice on how to tailor certain aspects of your personality to make women more comfortable come with the assumption that you have no personality to begin with? This is another example of the black and white thinking. Personality advice = “OMG women think men have NO personality AT ALL”
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 07:02 PM
11

So basically yes, you do just want women to tell men things they already know without adding anything constructive. looks aren’t very important to women Also, you’re talking specifically about being unfit here, not all looks. And not being fat or obese isn’t something you should be doing “for women” anyway. Women shouldn’t have to tell you that it’s unhealthy and undesirable to be fat.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 06:51 PM
9

Isn’t the fact that getting fit will help common sense? Why do you want women to tell you things you already know? The personality aspect tends to be more subjective and harder for men to pick up on, which is why women focus on that part when they give advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 06:35 PM
4

Or they want to give advice that helps the man improve in an area he actually has control over, rather than one which is genetically predetermined and can’t be changed.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 06:26 PM
6

Or they want to give advice that helps the man improve in an area he actually has control over, rather than one which is genetically predetermined and can’t be changed. Seriously, what do you expect women to say? “You’re ugly and no one will ever love you”?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 06:25 PM
18

This exactly — I’m also generally tired of people here claiming that what matters is either ONLY personality or ONLY looks. They both matter. “Personality matters” doesn’t mean that looks don’t matter and “looks matter” doesn’t mean that personality doesn’t matter. People on this sub are ridiculously black and white to the point of being moronic. It’s a joke.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 06:00 PM
0

Meet women through mutual friends and acquaintances. Randomly approaching strangers is weird both online and in real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 05:53 PM
4

If they’re regularly going on dates and acting like they don’t want to be there, that’s usually a pretty good sign that they shouldn’t be dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 05:51 PM
17

Maybe the women in their late 20s are dating older men, which skews the data. Or even if the dumb “multiple women dating chad” idea actually is true, in reality they are all single (just because they claim that they’re not single doesn’t mean that they aren’t) Bottom line is, they’re not complaining and whining online about being single constantly. Men are. If men also want to make up imaginary girlfriends and claim that they aren’t single to be happy, more power to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/24 04:28 PM
–

Or maybe they’re models or social media influencers who are promoting fashion or beauty brands on their pages. Maybe they were born to wealthy parents and have always had a luxurious lifestyle. Maybe they’re successful business professionals. Seriously, there are many MANY reasons a woman can be rich without a man giving her money. As for those DMs, a very large number of them are scams and even the offers which are not aren’t necessarily always taken up by the women who receive them. $10k for 2…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/24 01:55 AM
–

If you're a hot girl on instagram (and there's not a man on your page), then the girl probably at least occasionally going on paid dates or does some form of escorting. So all pretty single girls are prostitutes now? Jesus Christ the people on here are ridiculous
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/24 01:27 AM
–

What do you think the attractive women are doing then?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/24 02:32 AM
6

No, you misunderstand. These are different groups of women. Some prefer to take the lead, some want to be led. The vast majority, at least in my experience, don’t want either. They want personal autonomy.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/24 07:11 PM
2

She sounds illogical. Move on.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/24 06:18 PM
7

This exactly. Many women today want men who can protect and provide — but they don’t actually need them to do that. I think any aversion women have to the stereotypically “masculine” traits that OP is describing comes from fear of being controlled. Getting into a relationship with a man who is too dominant or assertive might mean that the woman has to sacrifice her own autonomy, which she doesn’t want. Women want to be able to set their own boundaries and limits and hold on to their personal fre…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/24 06:01 PM
13

Can’t speak for OP, but in that situation I would leave. Men can also leave relationships with women who won’t have sex with them for whatever reason. I think a good proportion of the problems discussed here all have the same answer — you are not compatible with the person you’re dating/trying to date. Move on.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/24 04:23 PM
20

Why does a relationship need a leader and a follower? Or two leaders or whatever? Can’t it just be two people making their own decisions with the other person in mind?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/24 11:16 PM
18

If he never wanted a relationship in the first place and just wanted to sleep with her once, what is he complaining about? He got what he wanted and he can move on. Her body count shouldn’t matter in the slightest. Whether or not pretending to want to commit just to get sex once is a bad thing is up for debate, but that is a separate issue which has nothing to do with body count either way. How is it her problem that he can’t get a woman who fits his requirements for a relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/24 04:59 PM
148

If this guy has an issue with her “more promiscuous” past, he can choose not to date her. Women don’t mind men having preferences. What they do mind is when men do decide to date women who don’t quite fit their preferences, and then shame them or get resentful because they don’t meet the requirements that they intentionally chose to overlook initially. If a man decides to date a woman with a promiscuous past, he has no right to take issue with it. He decided to date her himself and could have de…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/24 03:34 PM
4

The term “fetish” refers to an oddity in sexual preference, or a preference for something which people usually either find unattractive or don’t really care about. Height is a trait women commonly associate with attractiveness. It’s not off the cuff or distinct enough to be a fetish.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/24 11:33 PM
-1

It’s not about the person, it’s just the chain of logical reasoning. What incentive could anyone possibly have to tell their partner that they are bad at sex despite having a lot of experience? Saying “I can’t believe I lost it, I was so good before!” is much more likely.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/24 03:06 AM
-3

How do you know she wasn’t boring in bed even with the other guys? Was she describing how she fucked every one of them in graphic detail? If she was, that would be a red flag for me in itself, unrelated to who else she actually slept with and how. Also, if she did describe her past sexual experiences in detail, I highly doubt she would straight up say that she “starfished” even if she was doing that with everybody. She probably lied to make herself look like she was experienced/good at sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/24 09:44 PM
-1

OP is talking about the woman having more life experience, not trauma.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/24 09:31 PM
1

OP is talking about the woman having more life experience, not her “heart being elsewhere”.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/24 09:31 PM
–

Since women are more picky today, it seems totally reasonable Your argument is circular. The reason women are more picky today is because they have their own careers and don’t depend on men, as opposed to a time where it was essentially “find a husband or starve.” For what you’re proposing to actually happen in practice, women would have to get educated and start working so they can be independent if they need to be (which also gives them the luxury of being picky) and quit their jobs after they…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/24 08:21 PM
-2

Why should she be over it?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/24 02:43 PM
–

Presumably they don’t want to be housewives, and they also don’t want to be their family’s sole providers. They want to work, and their husbands can also work. That solves both problems — no “subjugation” of the woman, no burden of being a provider which falls entirely on the man. When women complain about the situation of women in the past, they don’t mean that they would rather be the men who had to be their family’s sole providers and got drafted. Similarly, when you complain about the situat…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/24 02:39 PM
1

Your point is not consistent. Are those 5 things things that men with “breadwinner” wives should do, or things they already do, with no input on how good or bad they are? Your post indicates the latter.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 04:40 PM
0

You do realize that the term “breadwinner” is used to refer to the partner in a relationship who provides for the other person, right? A breadwinner woman is a woman who provides for her husband. It’s not simply any woman with a career. If a man doesn’t want the woman he’s dating to be the breadwinner, he needs to start making even more money than her to get his “role” back. Then he can tell her to stop working. If she refuses to stop working, he can let her keep her money and still be the bread…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/24 04:30 PM
–

I'm saying the term makes no sense. When you say "betafucks" that implies that some part of the man's role is being a "beta." How is a man who is a provider but is also attractive a beta in any way? The term you're looking for is alpha (attractive) + bucks (provider). Betafucks would mean an ugly guy who women still want to fuck.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/24 07:08 PM
–

The term betafucks That doesn't make sense. Do you mean alphabucks?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/24 06:15 PM
15

Maybe, just maybe, all women aren’t exactly the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/24 04:46 PM
1

For many women bisexuality is a total deal breaker and massive ick. I can’t speak for all women, but for me personally it’s the feminine accessorization that’s a turn off, not the bisexuality itself. I don’t care if a guy is bisexual. I just don’t remain sexually attracted when guys dress flamboyantly or wear makeup. These things don’t always overlap, but they tend to at least semi-regularly.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/24 02:59 PM
–

Lol, this is false. (and absurd)
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/23 10:10 PM
2

guys flirting her up and spending time with her in hopes of sex Do you think women want or like this? Let’s say you can’t find a job — will you be able to take solace in the fact that a McDonald’s will still hire you?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 09:44 PM
3

2 days…vs 6 months? Is there no in between?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 05:34 AM
39

Why do you restrict loneliness and companionship to romantic relationships specifically? If what you’re describing as a “dead relationship” is better than being single, why does it have to be a relationship at all? Having close friends or family around while being single is astronomically better than being in a bad relationship. They can provide much more than a partner who doesn’t love you can. Yes, if you are completely lonely and have no friends or anyone else to rely on, I can see why you mi…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 12:52 PM
3

many men cannot be happy or function through life single. Why do you think that is?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 04:40 AM
2

So, shouldn't we then rate attractiveness by the ability to command what you want from the dating market? No, because that depends on what you want from the dating market. There is some objectivity to attractiveness -- healthy weight, muscle definition, average to above average height (in men), good hygiene and good hair and teeth are generally considered attractive universally. But preferences for facial features are highly subjective, as are preferences for personal style or aesthetic (hair le…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 01:31 AM
1

Even if that's not what you're arguing for, it doesn't make sense. Why is being single a male problem specifically?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 01:20 AM
1

At this point I feel like half the posts on this sub can be made completely null and void by just reiterating and emphasizing the fact that women are half the population. For every single man in the population, there is also a single woman. So men are not magically "less fortunate" and do not require their inability to find a partner to be considered a societal problem. Society promotes the more economically fortunate to help the poor, but they do not worry that the rich will be miserable for gi…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 11:26 PM
5

because "they're lazy fat fucks who can't move from the crater in their mother's basement sofa who think women are pieces of meat"? That's not what the person above said at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 03:58 AM
9

men will wonder where the heck they are This sounds like a manufactured problem. If all these men can’t find where women are, the women aren’t finding the men either. If all they do is work, they’re also not meeting single men. Why do you think they aren’t “wondering where the heck” men are, and complaining about it? Like you said, women are half the population. And they cannot magically see men who don’t see them.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/23 10:36 PM
1

Any woman who turns down every average guy also remains single herself. What do you think women with these “unrealistic” standards are doing? They aren’t in relationships either. Average guys are not the only ones being “left single,” average women are single too. Even if the number is as high as 80% (which I highly doubt) it’s not specific to men. The proportion of men and women in the population is equal.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/23 09:49 PM
1

A person’s dangling beer gut, man boobs don’t become physically appealing all of a sudden just because they have a nice personality. Well, no. At least not to me. I guess I was biased towards a slightly younger age group which doesn’t usually struggle with these things. But I’m sure older women who face similar problems (typical patterns of weight gain due to age) could potentially overlook these physical issues as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 01:24 AM
3

More than 70% of straight women are in relationships. Moreso than straight men What? Unless multiple straight women are in a relationship with the same guy, this is not possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 03:37 AM
6

For men trying to appeal to women it is like a hurdle race where the first hurdle is Physical attractiveness and then many other hurdles follow (income, status, personality, education) etc. Women then say "see to women, looks don't matter as much, look at all these other things we care about" This is true, on dating apps. Or in situations where women are explicitly screening large groups of men they don't know with the express purpose of finding a date. It's not that women don't care about physi…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 10:20 PM
3

And here I was with my over the counter painkillers. For once I can say I truly learned something from a dude on here.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:09 PM
3

I think the reason I’d use a term like “pretty boy” is because it’s more on the casual side. That way it’s easier to pretend I was kidding if he’s not into me. Honestly I think we’d both know that I just got rejected, but if it’s in public (especially) I would hope that he’d do me a solid by letting me play it off as a joke, lol. I do the same (to the best of my ability) if guys I’m not attracted to ask me out…. ”yep, that’s exactly how you say it, now try it on someone you’re into”
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/23 02:12 PM
6

“Hey, you’re a pretty boy and I like you. Can I take you out? Sorry, I’m bad at articulating this shit.” Or something in that ballpark. I probably wouldn’t be able to look cool or super confident doing it, I’d be laughing awkwardly the entire time. But I’ll do it anyway lol. As long as it’s not a guy I work with or have to see regularly even after I get rejected.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/23 01:55 PM
1

Going up to the person and asking.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/23 01:30 PM
6

I think “preselection” works the opposite way for me — if I know that another woman is currently interested in a man I’m interested in, I just back off. If you’re talking about exes/previous partners the person has had, a very attractive/accomplished ex tends to make me insecure and has largely the same effect — I consider the man out of my league and lose interest. If the ex was a “low rated” type, it might make me feel more attracted because I’ll feel like I have a better shot. Nothing can mak…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/23 08:04 PM
6

Lol, neither. I’d rather stay single and work on my research in peace.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/23 05:50 AM
2

GenZ as a whole is more conservative, but in my observation, most of our "conservatism" just comes as a result of wanting to dismantle the whole host of self-contradicting left wing rhetoric millennials have created. The "I'm independent and I make my own money, but I expect men to pay for dates" line is something millennials are much more likely to say than GenZ. And as I can clearly see in your comment, a good number of millennials don't say that either. In GenZ, the numbers will be even lower…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/23 03:16 PM
3

Lol, alternatively, he’s not the type anyone can stay in a relationship with for long because he can’t keep a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/23 05:15 PM
0

I would prefer men approach me indirectly, through friends or family member. no. I hate this. It's half assed and says a lot about the person if they can't even work up the courage to ask on their own. Also, it brings an unnecessary middle man into the picture. I'd much rather approach or be approached with blatant bold faced honesty, no pretenses. If you want to shoot your shot at a date and aren't interested in being just friends otherwise, be honest about that too. And take the answer for wha…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/23 03:51 AM
1

This is more of a political question than anything else, so I'll have to answer it from that angle. While I tend to lean left by American standards, there are certain aspects of modern liberal culture which I dislike, along with some aspects of social conservatism. Who is "in charge" in a relationship is irrelevant. People can do what they want. So is whether a couple chooses to keep the relationship open, or be polyamorous. Cheating would refer to anything outside of the approved terms of the r…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/23 03:17 AM
1

A sexy best friend This.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/23 02:05 AM
2

It means people tend to befriend and hang out with people who have similar interests and personalities as them. How is promiscuity part of this though? Similar minded people bond over their interests...but casual sex isn't exactly a group activity xD Well maybe it is for some people.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/23 07:41 AM
33

I'm single, I don't really date and don't have casual sex. I like the flexibility and independence you get from being single, and would prefer not to get into a serious relationship at any point in the foreseeable future. It's very important to me that I'm not tied down, and being in a position where I have to make decisions about my day to day life or future as part of a couple or "unit" in some capacity sounds extremely inconvenient. I would assume that a decent few men and women in their 20s …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/23 05:05 AM
1

I think a very significant component of it is biological. That doesn’t necessarily mean that the biological differences always line up with the way traditional gender roles work, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/23 10:53 PM
1

So you expect me to go up to strangers and say “Hey stop saying things about this person that you know that I’ve never met in my life.” As opposed to saying "hey, I know you, you're the person that horrible rumor was about!" by way of starting a conversation with someone you've never met in your life?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/23 10:50 PM
2

When she doesn't freak out with birds, and actually loves them. Are you trying to tell me that birds are real?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/23 09:12 PM
5

I actively test women for this by showing a bit of insecurity on purpose. Most women fail this one actually (especially those liberal NPCs, because a man can't have a problem!!). Or because they can tell that it's an act.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/23 05:00 PM
6

Bubbly/fun brash, loud and overly boisterous women are known to be widely off-putting to men Imo there's a fine line between the two. I can speak from personal experience -- I've been told that my tendency to ask too many questions and be very talkative and excitable is offputting to guys. And I'm not being brash, talking over people, making overly insulting jokes or arguing. What's being bubbly if not being curious, vocal and enthusiastic about almost every topic people bring up?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/23 04:56 PM
0

Not true. Plenty of people with PhDs make 50k or less. And that’s not even considering the fact that it takes 7-10 years of living on a very meager stipend to get a PhD in the first place. I’m in my early 20s, so I wouldn’t date anyone who’s old enough to already have an established academic career anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 01:34 PM
2

My field makes between 350-650k Data science?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 04:16 AM
7

It's not so much "giving up" as it is putting it on the back burner. For the most part I think all of these movements are just about not judging your own self worth based off of getting laid or getting dates. Most MGTOW/WGTOW/whatever probably wouldn't turn down a date with a person they found attractive in terms of appearance and personality if the opportunity directly presented itself. It's just a mental switch from dating "actively" to passively, which is more or less just a change in your mi…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 04:06 AM
10

Tell me you have a good income without telling me you have a good income. You clearly ignored the next line in my comment, where I gave a direct example of a situation where someone can be well educated and intelligent, but still not make a ton of money.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 03:56 AM
2

You wrote "put the final nail in the coffin" twice and that's irking me.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 12:53 AM
10

I can only speak for myself personally. Enthusiastic, excitable, eager to learn and try new things, intelligent, well educated, reads a lot, pleasant in social settings, good sense of humor, low maintenance, not easily offended. The ability to cook and clean is not a requirement, but willingness to learn and take up their share of the chores is. I don't care about income as long as the person is smart and well educated or pursuing an education, and is doing something with their life. A lot of ve…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 12:07 AM
1

Ok, who needed 45 minutes to read this post?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/23 10:40 PM
2

I don’t have a pretty face.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/22 06:40 PM
0

Dungeons and dragons and video games Girls are into that stuff too, you know.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/22 02:44 PM
2

I think the opinions of women (or men) who make firm decisions about not wanting kids at this age are almost always subject to change. I don't know if I'd want to have kids, right now the idea doesn't seem appealing. But maybe some kind of maternal instinct will hit when I'm 30 or so -- and there's a good chance it will happen with some of your friends as well. We are biologically programmed for reproduction. I don't know where you're from, but if you come from a socially conservative country, a…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 04:33 PM
10

I have a very colorful past and present. Been painting for many, many years.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 03:31 PM
44

Most of these takes come from people who are so far removed from the concept of a healthy (or even existent) social life that they’re basically irrelevant.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 03:30 PM
27

My experience is similar. Looks usually matter quite a bit for both genders. Being social is very important, and with the rise of the internet people spend hours and hours online each day. The tendency to be social in real life is becoming more and more rare in people, so the ones who are have a massive advantage. Income matters a lot less for men than it once did, while women’s income actually matters more — regardless of whether they’re planning on being career women or SAHMs in the future, wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/22 12:15 AM
6

And those marriages where women make more and are more educated, what's the success rate for those marriages? How many of those actually make it until death? It does seem to be the case that those marriages don't seem to last. But they can fall apart for plenty of reasons apart from "women no longer want a man who makes less than they do." That's not to say that this is never the reason, but I can think of a couple other possibilities right off the top of my head -- men might become insecure in …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/22 04:00 AM
1

I know. I wasn’t really talking about the validity of the underlying assumption. I was just examining whether the argument was consistent with that assumption.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/22 03:25 AM
2

Women are born with value. Men must work to create their own value. This is largely true, if you go by the traditional (and still somewhat relevant) criteria which both men and women have for a potential partner. But it's not a point in favor of either side -- the women at the top were always going to be at the top, while the ones who aren't can't really get there, since such a large chunk of what makes them attractive is their genetic component of beauty. Men have it easier in that they don't h…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/22 02:13 AM
2

because almost no women will approach a man unless she's way out of her league Absolutely false. female sexuality is contingent on BEING desired Even if this is true, why does the fact that she was the initiator mean that she won't be desired?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 10:52 PM
-1

unlike what the hypersexual market and culture wants us to be like I'd say the societal pressure to date/get married is significantly greater for women than it is for men across almost all cultures.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 10:44 PM
15

Or they just aren’t that concerned about finding dates Men should take notes on that one.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/22 09:24 PM
1

The problem is that women don't want men that are nurturers and homemakers. Look up survey data and women across the board refuse to marry men that don't make as much or more than they make and that aren't as educated if not more than they themselves are. Women won't accept a role reversal. I'm not sure about the veracity of these studies you've linked, because they don't really address the whole picture. Women are unlikely to accept men who make less than they do if the men won't pick up on the…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 04:24 PM
1

Stupid labels which no one takes seriously except in online incel and incel-adjacent communities.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 03:38 PM
4

When I say be chill, I don’t mean be one of those fake ass “you like this, oh me too” types. If you wouldn’t be friends with her than you should just chill and back off her tbh. Excellent advice. I think men would be so much more successful dating if they just pursued women who they actually liked. If you’re faking interest in her personality to get sex, it shows, no matter how “nice” you are. If you wouldn’t sit with her and talk about nothing in particular for 2 hours straight with no expectat…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 03:36 PM
5

Sure. But why is that solely the women's fault? I could put this entire argument backwards. Instead of the women changing to provide men with what they value, why can't the men change what they value and align themselves to fit the goals of career oriented women? If women these days don't care as much about being nurturing, family oriented or raising kids and choose instead to focus on their careers, which is offputting to men (who want kids), why don't men start to focus on these things themsel…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 04:26 AM
10

Average women that don't really bring anything to the table besides their education and their mediocre jobs want and demand more from average men even though they bring a lot less to the table. I don’t know what the disconnect here is. If average women have nothing but education and mediocre jobs, aren’t average men the same? How is what the women bring to the table any less?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 03:48 AM
3

You'd go back to university with the sole purpose of finding someone to date?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 01:58 AM
1

I was in a STEM field in college and am now a programmer, which means that most of my peers were (and still are) male. As a result, I have mostly male friends. I think there are about 4 people I could really call close "friends" at this point, and 3 of them are guys. I've known 2 of them for about 4-5 years. I don't care if friends are interested in me. If I don't return their feelings, I tell them firmly and they get over it and move on. I do the same if I am interested in someone -- I tell the…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 12:43 AM
2

I mean, my dad put her in the hospital on more than one occasion In that case, your dad is to blame period. No amount of this: “leave me alone” “stop” “don’t do that” “you aren’t understanding what I’m saying” and the likes can justify physical violence. He likely required help from a mental health professional. The fact that the other men your mother dated were the same way does not mean that she "pushed" them or that she was the problem. Their actions are equally despicable and they were in ne…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 05:15 PM
1

I think you're conflating the term "abuse" with general toxicity and disagreement in the relationship. Your mom could have been an unpleasant person, and that could have caused the people in her life (including the men she dated) to end up being bitter or distasteful towards her in the same way. But calling it abuse makes it take on an entirely different meaning. You can't instigate someone to "abuse" you. If any of the men your mom dated began to hurt her physically, they were abusing her, and …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 02:19 PM
23

be alone and kinda miserable I also like how OP assumes that all single women are "kinda miserable."
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 01:40 PM
1

Women, what do you want men to notice and appreciate about you? Independence. The knowledge and skills I have, irrespective of whether those skills are traditionally masculine or feminine. My sense of humor and our conversations. Appearance, to a degree. Positive personality traits, while being brutally honest about the negative ones as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/22 02:54 AM
13

What is the point you're making here?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/22 01:52 AM
2

In my experience, most men are very verbally supportive of their high earning partners, but all their enthusiasm disappears when it comes to them having to do actual work, like picking up a larger share of the household chores or cooking. Men are delighted to see women having careers…as long as they also take care of all the traditionally female responsibilities.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/22 02:22 PM
2

Closing the salary gap means women need to accept dating men earning less than them. I completely agree. Women need to compromise on their partner's income, and men need to compromise on looks. Women no longer have the time to stay as skinny as possible and primp themselves up every time they go out -- they're full time working professionals who also have to manage their own domestic and personal lives, just as men are. Men also need to start accepting women who make more than them, and learn to…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/22 07:58 PM
1

This is likely because more intelligent "nerdy" people have personalities and behaviors which are neither masculine nor feminine stereotypically. They're just off the norm.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/22 05:48 PM
2

At the library or just at home/friends' places.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/22 04:49 PM
1

100% trolling
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/22 02:29 PM
2

men generally can’t have completely platonic relationships with women if there’s physical attraction, and there is almost always physical attraction. Spend 10 years with a friend, then call them up one day offering sex, you’ll often get a sobering answer. I don’t understand this argument at all. If I’m extremely rich, and I call up a less wealthy friend one day offering to buy them a Tesla, they’ll likely happily accept. That doesn’t mean average people can’t be friends with rich people (who hav…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/22 07:12 PM
0

Lol, then maybe quit crying on Reddit about how the women you supposedly don’t care about don’t want you.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 01:31 PM
1

Oh, lol. My bad. The wording was vague. I took it to mean something along the lines of everything short of "just be yourself".
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 04:01 AM
5

This comment more or less proves my point. You (as in not necessarily you in particular, but most men on this sub) don't find the women you pursue genuinely interesting. You're putting on an act and it shows, which is one of the biggest reasons why you get turned down, even if you're being "nice".
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 03:54 AM
1

They've already been told the same exact advice you're giving now: Treat women like actual people. Be nice to women. Don't be an objectifying playboy or abusive jerk. They've been told that this was the method to how to win their love interests over which is clearly not the case. Except that's not my advice at all. I'm saying that if you want to date a woman and make friends with her for the purpose of being able to date her eventually, she's going to know that you're doing so, no matter how "ni…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/22 03:46 AM
2

You're asking men to hide their intentions and manipulate you with 'genuine interest'. No. I'm asking men not to pursue women romantically unless they're genuinely interested in them as people...or to do it without expecting much in return. There is a mechanism for organizing 'friends' that become partners, and friends that stay friends, and it starts on first contact. I don't think so. What's the difference? Personally I have never gone on a date with anyone I wasn't friends with first.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 10:15 PM
-5

I never said anything about being yourself. That's a vague and open ended instruction anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 08:33 PM
1

Good job missing the point entirely.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 07:39 PM
4

I think the general difference here is that men are looking to meet women with explicit romantic intent, while at the meeting stage, plenty of women are just looking for an interesting person who also finds them interesting. From my experience talking about this to people of both genders, women don’t like being approached in a way which indicates that the man is looking for sex, or a date. They just want to be appreciated as people. Romantic prospects come after a friendship, at least a casual o…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 05:48 PM
1

Irrelevant to me. I won't get into a serious relationship unless I'm in a situation where I can provide for both people. I do care about the person's education level and intellectual ability, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 03:15 PM
70

I keep repeating this over and over...online dating is not representative of anything. Most women don't even use the apps. Meet people in real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 02:55 PM
11

Lol, and also you don't need to have the women in your circle firsthand. Even if you're in an all male circle, you have access to more people. Maybe one of the guys can introduce you to his sister or his female friend.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/22 05:09 PM
6

doesn’t mean I have to be anything but cordial to you. Ghosting is generally not considered cordial.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/22 05:21 AM
2

I wouldn't say it's universally unattractive, but I would agree in that it is definitely an instant turn off for me personally. I'm pretty sure a lot of people would relax this condition as they age and their general pool of potential dates starts to lose hair, though. I like thick, longish hair and generally dislike facial hair of any kind.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/22 05:19 AM
6

It's mindless discussion to participate in during breaks from work.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/22 05:09 AM
7

I’m not even contesting your premise right now because it’s not relevant to the point I was making. What do you mean when you say having a six pack and being nice are different lives? That would mean you can only do one or the other.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/22 12:15 AM
11

The issue is that women won’t sleep with men who don’t want them to sleep with men. Shocker.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 11:36 PM
9

how does working on building a six pack make it harder to be nice, or vice versa?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 11:32 PM
1

Then those men wouldn't want to do it. When you ask "why would a man want to do X", you assume that the men in question do indeed want to do X. If a man wants to do it, the reason he would do it is the same reason a woman would do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 03:26 PM
1

Why would a woman want to be a stay at home mom? It's the same reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 03:23 PM
1

What does that have to do with my comment though, and what am I “assuming”? You’re saying I assumed that “women do the bare minimum” or something. I said no such thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 02:26 PM
0

What does that mean? I don’t get you,
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 01:12 PM
3

I don’t think this is true. I’m sure what a lot of people (men and women alike) look for in a partner is self-reliance, or at least an ability to be self-reliant, which usually translates to a decent education/a job that pays decently enough at least for that person. I wouldn’t want someone who’s reliant on me to pay the bills to the point where they’d be screwed over if the relationship were to end. But that doesn’t mean no couple would ever want an arrangement where either parent stays at home…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 11:19 AM
6

Rugged men, who can protect and provide for them. But in general, women want chiseled, muscular MEN. These are almost universally attractive features to women. This is false. I agree in that I prefer almost exclusively nerdy loners -- similar to you in terms of physical preferences and the type who can talk my ear off about science or books. Pretty much the opposite of "rugged." I don't think attractiveness can be defined in terms of absolute (or even predominant) rules, except maybe generally b…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/22 12:21 AM
3

apparently prefer to be single if men they are attracted to arent available This, imo, is one of the bigger problems. People need to learn that relationships aren't an end all goal in life. I think "learn to be single and happy" is much better advice than "lower your standards". I'd much rather be a spinster who gets to focus on her career and spend her free time with friends, family and on her own hobbies and interests than married to some so-called "alpha" I have nothing in common with and sad…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/22 04:49 PM
9

Online dating is not a good representation of anything because I'd say a lot of women don't use the apps except as an absolute last resort.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/22 06:23 PM
1

have you ever had a thing for a man who’s never explicitly or even implicitly flirted with you, solely platonic convos I've almost exclusively been into people who have done this.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/22 04:37 PM
-2

The "friend zone" is basically a concept which people who think their friends owe them sex have made up. It has nothing to do with gender. Anyone who is talking to someone and acting like a friend only as long as they can expect something more from the interaction is not a true friend. And a person who cannot be trustworthy as a friend is obviously not trustworthy in a relationship either. If you got "friend zoned", you were always just friends. If you want something more, ask, and accept the an…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/22 09:33 PM
3

Your argument is contingent on the assumption that tattoos defile the body in some way, and that sex also defiles the body in some way. That's the only reason someone would have "inhibitions" about either. But that's entirely a personal opinion. Some people might not think of tattoos as defiling at all, but they may think of sex that way. With some others it might be the opposite. With some it could be neither, and that's the only place where you can say this. But you wouldn't know about anyone'…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/22 09:57 PM
8

What does this have to do with sexual history? The only thing that could potentially be a sign of having had several partners is excessive partying because you meet more people at parties. But even that doesn't indicate anything of the sort on its own.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/22 09:29 PM
4

It seems the person you're replying to doesn't realize that there's more to attraction and enjoyment in a relationship than money, looks and sex. If she says that she only goes out with men who pay for dates , or men who “ plan” the dates, which also means pay for them, then I don’t go out with her I think someone saying that this is their policy is a much bigger red flag than if they actually let the other person plan/pay for one date. The attitude is the issue, not the money. As long as you we…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/22 05:00 PM
4

This is some of the worst advice I've seen on this sub and is basically an express ticket to getting ghosted.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/22 05:19 AM
5

What type of people are you swiping right on? If you want dates with some semblance of ability to hold an intelligent conversation, the general rule of thumb, irrespective of gender, is to go for people who've written at least a brief description which is grammatically correct and not obviously lazy.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/22 05:16 AM
6

That's true, but I don't think living with your parents as an adult/not being independent comes under that. I don't think it affects maturity either, it's just considered a form of flirting.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/22 05:57 PM
6

What's the logic behind wanting you to become a doctor for the prestige though? I don't see how that's supposed to help you be a homemaker, if that really was what they expected. Did they want to make you spend years of time and money on med school, only to get married and throw it all away? Wouldn't they expect your brother to have the more "prestigious" degree/career, since it would give him more money to support his family? Or were you told to focus on your studies and just get a prestigious …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/22 04:38 PM
8

You were expected to do well academically and he wasn't, but he was expected to get a high paying job and you weren't? That doesn't add up.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/22 04:10 PM
25

I see women in their mid 20s acting like teenagers (I think it’s an Asian thing) This is probably because in most Asian cultures (both east and south Asian) parents don't pressure their kids to become independent. Most Asian parents who can afford to pay for college for their kids do it (meaning the kids don't end up in debt) and there's no real pressure to move out either. The kids start working after college, but they don't have to live independently or do anything themselves. You only really …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/22 03:53 PM
5

"Oh hey, a naked man."
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 09:02 PM
4

but my bf is fucking clueless, like a girl would have to grab his dick and ask him for his number to get it basically. Lol, I feel this on a personal level. I'm usually oblivious as all hell when someone is interested in me.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 05:43 PM
4

I don't think your definition of being romantic is too far from the norm. That's basically how anyone would describe "romantic" activities which don't require you to splurge. talking about hobbies or silly things that make it seem like I'm talking to a friend rather than a potential date What do you think "potential dates" want to hear? This sounds fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 03:24 PM
2

presented neural net research I'm just getting into learning about neural nets. What was your project about?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 02:40 PM
1

I will flat leave if someone starts pitching MLM shit or astrology. Lol, this contributes to "not being a catch"? I will actually pay to date someone who wants their future partner to be into MLMs...
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 01:56 AM
18

I'm 2D.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/22 01:49 AM
14

Lol, you're the kind of guy who I'd turn down because I'm too insecure about not measuring up to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 06:23 PM
3

Before I say anything further I just want to say that I appreciate you. Your question is very reasonable and I wish more people on this sub would ask or frame things this way. I see no comparison of incomes, bitching about women (or men) being sluts/entitled, or anything of the sort -- just a direct 1-1 comparison of a single trait. That being said, I'm sure you'll have traits you're looking for apart from weight, and so will the women you pursue. Maybe you could get a super fit model-esque girl…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 05:22 PM
0

Ask.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/22 10:01 PM
2

Talk to me about things I'm interested in, have a decent conversation, don't comment on my appearance or give any fake compliments whatsoever. Don't give real compliments either -- you genuinely can't do that with someone you've just met. Then I'll probably ask you out myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/22 09:58 PM
4

Women want men who are “above” them in some way, shape, or form. For me this is likely to be a huge point of insecurity in the relationship. I can be compulsively competitive and try to "date down" or date completely outside my field so as not to feel incompetent. This mostly applies to intellectual/financial accomplishment, but it can extend to other areas as well. I don't know if that's typical of either men or women, but I do find that a lot of people see this as a completely alien take on da…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/22 11:13 PM
3

I can't stop laughing at the way the title is phrased.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/22 10:07 PM
1

Or he doesn't flirt and the girls get to know him as a person first, after which he can take it to the next level if he finds them interesting. If somebody is naturally shy, there's no need to give them advice on how to go from 0 to 100. If you can't approach new people and start a conversation, flirting is out of the question.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/22 09:43 PM
24

Personally I have a thing for analytical, cold and calculating types. Maybe even the socially awkward nerds who don't really know how to deal with people and their feelings -- of which the latter is probably because I tend to be like that myself. On the whole I prefer a more stoic person who doesn't wear their heart on their sleeve, but it's not a dealbreaker either way. Ultimately, I want a partner who prioritizes rationality over emotion or gut feeling while making a decision, especially an im…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/22 09:38 PM
3

Ease. I considered myself a catch when I was dating and I enjoyed the challenge. If a woman is easy, it's less fun for me. Right. But isn't this also context dependent? Is it about whether it's easy for you to date/sleep with her or whether it was easy for other people to do it? Who's "easier", a woman without too many previous sexual partners who asks you out herself (meaning that she's very "easy" in a sense, you don't have to chase her at all) or a decidedly "promiscuous" woman who needs you …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/22 09:19 PM
2

The dating sites cater to men more than they do to women, because of the format. I'll give a personal example. This is an exchange which actually happened in my group of friends. Friend 1 (male): I swipe left automatically if I don't like the picture. Friend 2 (female): I swipe left automatically if there's no description or if they have poor grammar. I'd say about 50% of people (or maybe more) don't add descriptions at all, seeing as the apps don't even usually make descriptions mandatory. So i…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/22 08:42 PM
2

I've always been really curious about what exactly some people think having a large number of previous sexual partners communicates. Anyone I date could have previously slept with 0 people or 100, I don't care. Is it because you expect someone who's slept with a lot of people to be less picky, meaning that you feel devalued, like you're just one of the options out of the 10 others they could have gone for? Or does it send some kind of message that you'll never be able to satisfy them sexually be…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/22 08:06 PM
10

This isn't necessarily an issue only men have, but I sympathize on the whole with people who have a high or generally inconvenient libido. These people usually tend to be men, but I've met a few girls who struggle with this as well. Personally my sex drive is quite low - usually I need direct stimulation (either mental or physical) from a person I find attractive to be turned on, and if I have no one like that around I can go months without even masturbating. I don't watch/read porn, and I don't…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/22 05:51 AM
3

I am terrified/unable of trying to flirt with women at bars & clubs I would suggest not going in with the intention of flirting at all. Just try to make friends by talking to them the same way you would with guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/22 12:33 AM
21

I think this is likely the main reason for most people who otherwise have their act more or less together to end up in a situation where they've had no dating or relationship experience. Part of the issue is also that as an adult, it can be very hard to socialize in real life with people outside of the workplace. Meeting people takes effort, and finding friends, relationships or sexual partners comes after you meet people in some or the other capacity. This applies to both men and women. I'd say…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 09:46 PM
2

This, 100%. Once again, someone feels the need to view the behavioral patterns of particular people through a pointlessly gendered lens.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 05:32 PM
12

I don't even get what "entitled" means here, lol. If she was flirting with OP but didn't want to be asked out, that could be for many reasons apart from being entitled. For one, she could have gotten the impression that OP only wanted a one night stand or whatever, and didn't want that. Her way of turning OP down was uncalled for and she doesn't seem like a pleasant person by any means. But I wouldn't pin it down as "entitlement" in terms of dating per se. She just sounds rude. As stated previou…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 05:09 PM
16

lots of eye contact Oh no, not the eye contact
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 04:42 PM
1

Sure, when you do it it's hot, when I do it I get sued for sexual harassment...
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 06:54 AM
4

This sounds about right.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/22 01:13 AM
1

I'm pretty sure that most people don't care at all either way, seeing as spiders, roaches or horror movies are pretty much the only things in the realm of "danger" which people have to encounter regularly these days. Society in most of the Western world is largely quite safe. If someone is facing an actually dangerous situation (such as being sexually assaulted/mugged/held at gunpoint) I doubt their "bravery" when it comes to things like spiders or insects is going to make a difference at all. T…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/22 09:20 PM
9

I'd say yes, because a big part of attraction for me is overlap of interests. I really enjoy hearing people talk about things they're interested in and naturally take an almost compulsive interest in the topic, even if it's something I don't know anything about. So if they're open to my incessant probing for details and explanations and engage actively in the conversation, I am going to be interested in being friends with the person. I also like it if they take interest in what I have to say abo…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/22 08:23 PM
18

Intelligence takes another intelligent person to appreciate it. Unfortunately, men tend to pass all women through a preliminary appearance filter, and then complain when the women they've filtered out don't appreciate their intelligence. Finding a very attractive woman who also appreciates your intelligence (meaning that she is intelligent herself) is going to be very difficult. Of course she doesn't appreciate it. You picked her for her looks, not her intelligence. It's like hiring the best bio…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/22 06:16 AM
2

his friend almost slipped that he liked me soooo much. That I had no idea how much. What do you mean by almost slipped? The friend either said it or didn't. There's a good chance you're misinterpreting them. I just have a hard time believing that a guy wouldn't force himself to make a move if she is his dream girl. He probably didn't make a move because you aren't his dream girl, the same way you didn't make a move on him because he isn't your dream guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/22 03:29 AM
2

Why? What do you expect people to even do with so much money?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/22 10:39 PM
1

I usually don't care about physical features and will settle for almost anything if the person has the right personality. But I have two very shallow "prerequisites" - straight white teeth and a full head of hair. Apart from that - a clean shave with aristocratic looking facial features, and for some reason, glasses. I like the suave intellectual elite look and also the nerdy look. I don't like "rugged" types at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/22 09:55 PM
23

Most competent women in your major cities are much more obsessed with how good looking you are. It honestly baffles me how so many people just don't get this. It has very little to do with gender. Now that women have the means to support themselves financially and the structure of society is changing so that more and more women make their own money, they are going to begin looking for things in a partner apart from whether he can pay the bills. It's what men have been doing all these years. Once…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/22 09:24 PM
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