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Coupon_Problem Archive

View 4 posts and 27 comments by Coupon_Problem on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
51

Coupon_Problem/r/askFDS23/06/21 06:00 PM
5

Coupon_Problem/r/askFDS21/02/21 06:17 PM
3

Coupon_Problem/r/askFDS21/06/21 03:16 PM
1

FDS RESCUE MISSIONCoupon_Problem/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 02:04 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
81

How would you expect a HVM to handle his shit? What are your standards for a yourself or any person enduring hardship? Sometimes I think we rely too much on guides and not enough on our standards and intuitions. Basic rule: no matter how rough the patch, there is no excuse for dealbreaker behavior. Disrespect, abusive behavior, addiction, degrading treatment, cheating, neglect. A pattern of accountability, honesty, humility and displaying a motivation to handle one’s business is what I personall…
/r/askFDS25/03/22 08:50 PM
3

I encountered this on a date and, as a test, I simply repeated something he just said back to him. I was like, "sounds like that time in your life was hard" and he was like "no, well, I got through it" after literally just saying he went through a "hard time." No thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/22 12:38 AM
15

Send a text saying you’re not interested. Here’s one: “It was nice meeting you but I’m not interested in anything further.” Immediately after sending that text, block and delete. Nothing to it but to do it.
/r/askFDS17/03/22 01:44 PM
55

Sorry, he blacked out at his own wedding? And that was the only time he wasn’t dismissive and standoffish to you? Then you describe a pattern of controlling and condescending behavior towards your friend in the years since? With all that, the “thank you for trusting me” is a red herring.
/r/askFDS28/01/22 09:44 PM
4

Thanks for clarifying, I wondered if I missed something. You got this. If you start to feel that rising pressure to perform or your people-pleasing is activated, you have the perfect script in one of your other comments to communicate your boundaries tactfully.
/r/askFDS28/01/22 09:09 PM
20

Is he asking you for feedback? Or is this a way of sharing work and connecting? It’s not clear to me why you presume that he wants a critique from you. You set the boundary by not doing things you’re not comfortable with. Personally, I’d allow him to share with me as you shared with him. It seems you feel this relationship may benefit you personally and professionally. I’d keep comments surface level and as an opportunity to get to know him better (if that’s what you want). If he asks for more d…
/r/askFDS28/01/22 04:11 PM
6

As someone who enjoys teasing and roasting, I see what you mean about the vulnerability thing. When used well, teasing can be a good way to be vulnerable with others as it lets you express how you love the other person for their perceived imperfections and flaws. We can join in life’s goofiness and not take ourselves so seriously. However, as you noted, the big tell for me is how someone handles it when they’re told a joke hurts or crosses a line. Teasing/roasting only works if its in a context …
/r/askFDS21/12/21 08:29 PM
21

Oh this sounds extremely annoying and frustrating. She sounds like a steamroller. Some of this is going to be your boss’s job to handle. For example, you are not responsible for correcting her behavior in a meeting where your boss is present. However, you are responsible for communicating to your boss how it is affecting your work. Something like, “Sometimes I feel I’m not able to relay important information in meetings because Sally is taking up much of the space. Do you have any ideas how we c…
/r/askFDS04/11/21 06:23 PM
28

So he said sorry. Is he communicating empathy about how that must have made you feel? Is he willing to self-reflect and understand why he reacted this way not just, "I had a flight response?" And I couldn't help but notice, " it’s been a great relationship *for the most part*." What's the "for the most part" about? The ideal emotional reaction to an ex is neutrality. He's not there, so there's more for him to unpack. I would recommend him take the time to explore this with friends/family/a thera…
/r/askFDS24/09/21 09:16 PM
18

I think you will find that once you start enforcing your boundaries (i.e., blocking and deleting), you will build trust in yourself. You will know you are looking out for yourself. Decisions like these will start to feel like, "I'm taking care of myself" and less like "I'm missing an opportunity with this man by not giving him more chances." Knowing yourself and acting in your own interests is what will generate increased confidence. Confidence doesn't spring forth out of nowhere; it is built by…
/r/askFDS21/09/21 08:15 PM
31

This is a boundary awareness & enforcement issue. The boundary issues are undercut by some insecurity and self-doubt difficulties, which is understandable as you are young and new to dating. From my reading, you are sending VERY mixed messages with your behavior. For example, situation 1: you tell him you're not really interested in dating, but then you go out with him and have sex. If you wanted to casually date and not have casual sex, it is on you to enforce that boundary and go on dates with…
/r/askFDS21/09/21 05:55 PM
174

Wow many thoughts. First, thanks for posting it. I'm reading this 3-months after leaving a very damaging relationship with an abusive man who was mentally ill and narcissistic. An outline like this is helpful to deconstruct the "monster" of the narcissist. Narcissistic traits are banal, people with them are human, they do the things they do because it benefits them, plain and simple. They're not special kinds of monsters. It's also helpful to see how straight-forward the relational dynamics are …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 03:11 AM
20

The fact you are asking this and not seeing the glaring issues tells me you are not ready to date. Get yourself and your boundaries in order and then proceed. Right now you are at risk of being in a very bad situation, whether it’s with this guy or the next one.
/r/askFDS21/08/21 04:00 AM
34

What do you want from this post? If the relationship feels wrong for whatever reason, end it. You’re patronizing her with your attempts to “educate” her. Why are you doing that? So you can stay “good” and she won’t be angry or upset with you when you end it and it hurts? Let her be hurt and upset and think you’re the bad guy. It’s her right. I GUARANTEE she’ll get over it.
/r/askFDS23/07/21 09:32 PM
30

Good for you!! You are doing the right thing for your future. I’m sure of it. 1:No contact is a MUST. Delete everything. Block him everywhere. Do not go pain shopping checking his socials when you get sad one night. No. No contact means NONE. My trick for this is saying to myself “no contact for 30 days.” Then when 30 days is up you keep it up and go another 30 or 60. Breaking into 30 days initially helps a lot to get through the vulnerable moments when you want to break NC. You can do 30 days r…
/r/askFDS15/07/21 02:57 AM
14

Block and delete with extreme prejudice! You gave this guy about 3 extra chances he didn't deserve.
/r/askFDS28/06/21 12:00 AM
3

Absolutely. It’s like suddenly you feel like you’re being made into them right? I hope you can find your way through the situation you’re in now. It’s very, very hard. Sounds like you have your eyes open, which I found really helps you bounce back after it finally does end. ❤️
/r/askFDS23/06/21 09:02 PM
5

Amen sister
/r/askFDS23/06/21 08:58 PM
5

It’s like they all came out of the same swamp! Happy to hear your story of it helps to share.
/r/askFDS23/06/21 08:25 PM
8

Yeah you’re right. I think I doubt myself because I wonder if I “overreacted” or was indeed “too sensitive.” Maybe it could have worked out if I tried harder… 🙄 I already know he was abusive to her. He told on himself (as they always do). I guess I’m looking to crush ANY doubt which, as you mentioned, is 1) not necessary and 2) not fair to use her for.
/r/askFDS23/06/21 08:24 PM
18

Thank you. Yes you’re right. I first got the idea when I was trying to leave and it kinda stuck with me. Thanks for spelling out that rationale.
/r/askFDS23/06/21 08:23 PM
6

Thank you ❤️ In thinking about it, I know he abused her because he told stories that were intended to make her look bad but instead made him look like a monster. I hope she knows what he did wasn’t right (it was both their first relationship).
/r/askFDS23/06/21 08:15 PM
17

Thank you for the insightful comment. I actually got the idea to contact her from that book, as (iirc) he recommends women get both sides of the story from past partners, especially if he claims the ex was the abusive one. I was surprised to see that recommended and it really got the wheels turning…
/r/askFDS23/06/21 08:13 PM
3

One of my exes called his ex “psycho” and spoke about her with so much contempt. I should’ve seen that for the flag it was. When we were breaking up, he called me crazy and told me I needed to “be committed.” Sisters, one of us was threatening to burn their own house down during that conversation — and it wasn’t me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 10:18 PM
39

I remember our first fight, my abusive ex yelled, “I’m still here, I didn’t call you names!” I said sarcastically, “thanks for not verbally abusing me!!” And he was sooooo offended. I shoulda been out right then.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 04:49 AM
16

Basically any form of communication in which you feel “set up” to respond in a constricted way or wind up being “the bad guy.” Think about the canvassers who ask “do you have a minute to save dying children?”: The set up: (after a period of moody silence) “You’re mad at me now aren’t you?”The heist: “No baby of course not!” The set up : (after you stand up for yourself)“You don’t like me anymore :(“The heist: “Aw of course I do, I’m sorry if that came off harsh.” The set up: (after dominating a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 07:37 PM
4

Please get in touch with some domestic violence resources. You can google the national hotline #. Even if you’re not 100% convinced he is abusive or that this is a DV situation, these are exactly the kinds of questions DV professionals are trained to handle. Especially point #1. You’re not the first woman and you won’t be the last to be in this situation. ❤️
/r/askFDS03/03/21 09:55 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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