~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 3 | Would you have gotten married and had kids if you knew how the sex "turns off" with your wife?No. She was off birth control years before we ever met. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/06/24 02:00 AM |
| 7 | The Abundance Mindset - Dating after DivorceNobody cares. Why are you here? This is a men’s space. It’s even in the name, in case you get confused. Guys, women literally have to invade every last place that men can use to talk about real shit, in order to inject their vapid opinions into it and moralize what is ok as if they’re some moral superior. | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/02/24 07:02 PM |
| 1 | My friend introduced his kids to new GF after 2 weeksIf you think he’s a bad example for your kids then by all means, cut them out. Counterpoint: his kids, his choices. friends are hard to come by these days. I have friends I disagree with their parenting, politics, or otherwise - but we’re still friends. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/02/24 12:52 AM |
| 8 | Dating App DeliriumImagine you get almost all of your validation from simps and matches from people on dating apps. You meet someone you like, but you always think there might be someone better, so you string people along and trash good options for the potential of better ones. And eventually you hit a point where your best days are behind you. After all the risqué, sexually charged experiences you have, you just get stuck on the best sex you had, and constantly compare everything to that feeling, even if you’ll n… | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/02/24 03:13 AM |
| 5 | Idk why I am so weakYou are weak because you’re literally dependent on her. You live in her country on her terms. She’s more educated and achieved than you are. You have no options because you’ve painted yourself into a corner here, and you have oneitis for her. Get into the gym. Figure out a way to earn more money. Think about the realistic option that divorce might be in your future. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/02/24 04:43 PM |
| 16 | Why isn’t this more well known?Society today doesn’t like dealing with any sort of generalizations or stereotypes. Combine that with an extreme bias to protect women, and you get this “well not ALL women” type of language. Even when gender studies demonstrate women are hypergamous, tend to have more borderline personality traits, and other aspects that apply biologically to women, no one wants to admit it because they want to believe everyone is born as a blank slate. “Bad women aren’t born like that - it’s just society’s fau… | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/02/24 02:05 PM |
| 8 | do we exist to be fathers?Harsh advice but that’s your own fault dude. Prioritize yourself. Gyms have kids centers that your kids can go play at while you lift. Let your kids play while you lift. Do a calisthenics workout if you really can’t handle weights around them Find solutions to challenges with your kids. They’ll see you pushing yourself and prioritizing yourself instead of just being duplicative and losing your attractive qualities. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 15/02/24 11:52 PM |
| 13 | Through mediation wife does not want to sign.Hilarious how women do not think this shit through. She is your enemy now. Stop letting her abuse your protective instinct. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/02/24 11:00 PM |
| 1 | Erratic behavior-AdviceHow about we flip the generic male advice script? Hey, try to be more empathetic and present, do more chores around the house, and listen to his needs. Make sure you try and read his mind, and if you fail, it’s your fault. Or maybe take yourself to an appropriate subreddit. I hope you have to pay him alimony. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/01/24 11:22 PM |
| 3 | Still struggling 4 months inBrother, it’s going to take awhile to change your mindset - but when you make a woman your central point of focus, she loses respect for you. What you have to internalize is that marriage isn’t forever - in my experience women don’t have that same sense of commitment as men. They are literally programmed to be able to walk away and detach easier. There’s literally nothing else to do other than get the process over with and start over. This time around, grab your nuts to make sure they are still … | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/01/24 04:26 PM |
| 5 | Any Advice for Someone on the Brink?Your wife is mad at you because she made a bad deal for herself? Brother, that’s the stupidest fucking thing I’ve ever heard. She’s mad for another reason or just doesn’t like you anymore. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/01/24 11:29 PM |
| 3 | ScheduleAnd you believe her? She’s your enemy now, why are you listening to a single thing she says? There’s no evidence women have any different effect with school aged kids versus dad. She’ll find a way to pay for babysitters dude. Or some dude who will front her the money for one. Preserve your weekends. Trade them IMO. Or don’t, and let her win this battle. Whatever works. Lastly - what do you think she’s been doing while traveling all over? Going to bed at 8pm and drinking warm milk? She’s probably… | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/12/23 01:48 AM |
| 7 | ScheduleIt’s always hilarious when i see a woman propose a schedule with the kids that freezes you out of the prime “going out” nights of your weekend (Friday and Saturday). You know it’s so she can go on dates and get dicked down on weekends. Then have the kids back on a Sunday so she can nurse her hangover and chill. I’d personally dictate you switch weekends. Suggesting you just don’t have any Friday and Saturday nights is socially tough. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/12/23 01:06 AM |
| 18 | Advice on how to get through the emotional pain.She’s mourning the marriage right now. Just wait until she actually finds a new man - she will go straight cold on you as if you’re the most disgusting piece of shit she’s ever known. If she claims to have her mind made up but is also dangling a “maybe we have a future if you change” - she’s just buying herself time to find a new man. And if she doesn’t, she’ll keep you on a drip feed. How’s it feel to be a fucking backup plan? | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/12/23 11:07 PM |
| 2 | Sex decline with the established, decaying marriage.It’s literally rooted in evolutionary biology, but ok mod man. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/12/23 12:31 PM |
| 11 | Sex decline with the established, decaying marriage.Look up passive dread. Right now your wife doesn’t feel tingles to fuck you because she’s too comfortable. So she just comes up with dumb excuses that lead to choreplay and other goalpost moving behavior. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/12/23 01:51 PM |
| 1 | Sex decline with the established, decaying marriage.Here’s the thing. You’re playing by one rulebook, while women are playing using another one. Your morals aren’t projected on her. It’s one of the hardest parts coming into this redpill awareness is realizing you’ve wasted all this time using a lens which isn’t relevant to modern women. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/12/23 01:45 PM |
| 1 | I'm not strong enough for thisYou invest too much, stop focusing on yourself, and you end up looking vulnerable and weak. Whether you know it or not, it’s your fault. You let yourself get taken advantage of. Sack up my man. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/12/23 05:16 PM |
| 2 | Ex Called to Meet UpIt’s counter to most advice you get here, but hate fucking your ex has gotten me over quite a few exes that I pedestalized. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/12/23 11:15 PM |
| 1 | Ex Called to Meet UpEven if she thinks she wants you back and you think you want back together - you need to watch out. You’re effectively communicating she is your best option. Things might go well if you get back together, and then she might become a cunt again. She won’t respect you man. If you just want to get laid, have sex with her if you really want. Watch out for a false accusation. Ex sex is the best sex. But don’t get back together with her. You’ll be in your same situation in a couple years. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/12/23 10:55 PM |
| 26 | Fear of committing after seeing all the horror stories here. Young man need adviceTake it from every guy here: Living with a woman absolutely erodes your sex life. Marrying her will destroy whatever’s left. Keeping her anxious and uncertain about her status keeps her wanting to please you. Also, never ever sacrifice anything in your life for a woman. She’ll respect you less for it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/12/23 02:05 AM |
| 12 | How did you guys get past the doubts and potential regret of divorcing your wife?Your problem is that you’re sacrificing and making a woman your priority. In this relationship or the next, make yourself the priority and see how that goes for you. For specific advice, the stay plan is the go plan. Start lifting weights, eat better, double down on your work, and be more social. You change for the better for your current relationship or a future one. You may decide your current wife isn’t worth it anymore. | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/11/23 03:28 PM |
| 3 | Anyone ever feel like never wanting a relationship again?I’ve seen Red Pill YouTubers talk about how women and society have figured out how to exploit men’s genetic desire to protect women. And while I’m a bit medium on some red pill stuff, they absolutely have a point. Don’t you feel that sense of guilt? That sense of wanting to step up and help? Or to say “nah I got this one?” when another $150 tab gets dropped? It’s there and we all have it. That want to pitch in and make sure your girl is comfortable or has her problem solved. Once you feel any se… | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/11/23 02:17 AM |
| 5 | Post DivorceSeriously, where are you guys finding some of these women? I understand if you’re in a dead bedroom, or your wife was a good woman and just fell into female nature and cheated with a boss at work. By all means - you got unlucky, divorce the bitch. But like…you thought it was a good idea to marry her after she’s already fucked over two guys? | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/11/23 09:34 PM |
| 29 | Divorce Realization: We are all dating our Exes.Ah yes, hypergamy. “Till death do us part” has turned into “Till I find a ‘better’ guy”. The book “Practical Female Psychology” is a great read on the stages of a relationship. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/11/23 04:28 PM |
| 19 | Wife divorce (update)Seriously is there a playbook online that women follow that says to start racking up crazy amounts of credit card debt right before filing because your husband will have to pay half? | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/11/23 02:56 AM |
| 2 | My 2nd divorce is comingI know this is a small consolation prize, but just think - there are some men that do get married multiple times and never find this place or other men’s resources. They think it’s just only their fault. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/11/23 09:57 PM |
| 0 | So my wife, idk what she is actually, wanted space and now we are taking a “break”Isn’t there a divorce_women sub you should be on? You don’t belong here. | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/11/23 05:14 PM |
| 45 | So my wife, idk what she is actually, wanted space and now we are taking a “break”When she says she wants a break she’s looking for an exit - she just hasn’t found anyone yet. Or she has, and she’s going to fuck that guy and if it doesn’t work out and you find out about it, she’ll justify it by saying “well it was during our break”. | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/11/23 12:42 AM |
| 9 | I’ve cried a total of 30 minutes since my divorce began in the last 6 monthsKindly fuck off. This isn’t women’s male feminist ally club. | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/11/23 12:03 AM |
| 1 | Watch out for red pill circle jerk contentNah. I just don’t believe we’re going to change anything by trying to regurgitate Rollo and Myron talking points with a larger blue pilled society. By the way, Rollo frequently says the same. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/11/23 01:26 PM |
| -1 | Watch out for red pill circle jerk contentMore like an enema. A suppository is nothing. I got cheated on ruthlessly in college by a girl. I’ve been hit with female nature right in the face. I have no issue with the red pill, just the Myron and Pearl shows meant to generate outrage. I think you missed the point of my post entirely. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/11/23 03:35 AM |
| -3 | Watch out for red pill circle jerk contentThanks for your diagnosis, I’ll be sure to get that checked out. I’ll go ahead and turn around so you can kindly suck my ass. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/11/23 09:04 PM |
| -8 | Watch out for red pill circle jerk contentThat’s all fair and aspirational, Idealistic, and rational. I’ve considered all of that and through experience, it’s a horrible idea to associate yourself publicly, privately, or 1-1 with anyone that you’re into pro-male or red pill shit. You’re better off leading by example. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/11/23 04:39 PM |
| 1 | Confused but not MadHey man, how did this turn out? | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/11/23 03:51 PM |
| 1 | Can we come up with new narratives cause Im sick of the bullshit being perpetuated to make scummy moms feel better about themselves.Be careful with this. By “this” I mean, bringing cultural dating/marriage/male female dynamics into open casual conversation, especially with family and at the workplace. It’s easy to watch a lot of red pill or black pill content quickly. Suddenly you’re parroting talking points about women and regardless of how true they are, you sound like a neckbeard that lives in your mom’s basements and argues with feminist subreddits on weekends. It’s not worth your time, online or offline. Saying this as … | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/11/23 12:24 PM |
| 1 | Competitive Wifehttps://youtu.be/g9ofZGLeTkA?si=OMgv2rld1o2plHWm | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/11/23 03:20 AM |
| 38 | Competitive WifeStraight up insecurity and societal programming. She somehow has it in her head that because she values a lifestyle with cars and status and money, that it’s what you must value as well. Women today have no fucking clue that men just want respect, peace, and regular sex. As many have said, women are just defective men now. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/11/23 03:29 AM |
| 3 | Wife/Mommy boss and my storyAbsolutely. I was at the grocery store today and so many husbands looked like they were sleepwalking through life, just shuffling along with their wives pushing the cart and telling them what to get. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/11/23 02:05 AM |
| 3 | Wife/Mommy boss and my storyYour post doesn’t make sense at all. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/11/23 02:03 AM |
| 3 | Wife/Mommy boss and my storyI think there’s a lot of rambling here and I didn’t edit my post well. My main point is that if you let them, your wife will try and become mommy boss if you aren’t leading the relationship, and it’ll extend beyond kids into all aspects of your life. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/11/23 02:01 AM |
| 15 | Are we to blame for picking the wrong partners?The idea of soulmates or limited compatibility with people is silly IMO. There are tons of women you’re probably compatible with. Women just conform to your lifestyle anyways. The key is to not lose yourself in marriage. It’s a story i see over and over in this sub. Either you get married and just stop being a masculine leader, or more commonly, you have kids and she turns into one of those “mommy bosses”. Mommy boss is the most dangerous IMO. She’s ordering you around for bottles and baths at f… | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/11/23 06:45 PM |
| 46 | I just got an amicable divorce. What should I do now?Move forward and don’t make the same mistake of planning your life around a woman. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/11/23 06:58 PM |
| 3 | Why do stbex’s memory of the past differ so much from reality?You’ve mentioned this a couple times on this sub but I cannot find anything when I search for “lights off” on google. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/11/23 02:03 AM |
| 2 | Why do stbex’s memory of the past differ so much from reality?This story has been told a million times here indeed. Fortunately, most guys seem not to give in. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/11/23 02:00 AM |
| 7 | Sometimes I question my sanity and some venting.Arguing with women is pointless. Their goal is not to argue logically or soundly - they just want to ensure they are not the villain. It’s why you see so many women blame cheating on the man - it was his fault for neglecting her or whatever else. It’s why even though you might be right in the content, the context (ie how you say it, if you sound angry) is what she’ll argue about. Once you have a woman who does nothing but argue with you, she’s effectively trying to drive you away and save face s… | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/11/23 01:56 AM |
| 17 | Update: I tried... to no availUnfortunately I think you’re learning a very expensive lesson: never make a woman your priority and give up your own work/goals, even if she says it’s what she wants. | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/10/23 07:58 PM |
| 3 | Not sure if I should divorce...but wife moved in her ps5 guy friendYou think while you’re at work or away, she’s not in that trailer? | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/10/23 07:01 PM |
| 41 | Not sure if I should divorce...but wife moved in her ps5 guy friendThis can’t be anything other than a troll post, right? If it’s not…your wife is living with another man that isn’t her father. You think they’re just making soap? They’re playing hide the wiener dude. She’s ruthlessly cheating on you and using Jesus and the church to allow it. Unreal. But I still think it’s gotta be a troll post. | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/10/23 06:46 PM |
| 4 | Update: Separation UltimatumAh, sounds like you’re part of a game of accountability roulette, where your wife blames anyone and everyone for her problems except herself. Everyone here will tell you the same thing - once she’s said she wants to separate, that’s just her time to find a new monkeybranch (new guy) AND plan her next move against you. Don’t let her do that - just file first. | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/23 07:19 PM |
| 5 | Utterly DestroyedI think by now everyone has learned not to light themselves on fire to keep others warm. Sorry to hear about this man, but your lesson will be helpful for someone here to learn from. | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/23 04:11 PM |
| 1 | If a new love interest is worried you're not over your ex...The “Are We Dating the Same Guy” Facebook group mentality is out of control. | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/23 02:17 PM |
| 26 | I can't be the only one...It’s a very common trope - men have to stop pursuing/selling in a relationship, but women never need to stop marketing. When a man calls out a woman for this sort of scummy behavior, he’s met with “you’re just insecure”. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/10/23 05:28 PM |
| 9 | Does my wife (30F) regret this? I (33 M) am so confused, any advice welcome.Just wanted to say this is an amazing job breaking this down. I’m not OP, but am going to look into a couple of the books you put out there. There are a couple I haven’t read. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/10/23 11:11 AM |
| 6 | When/how to tell her it’s overTalk to a lawyer, discuss your intentions to divorce, then file and serve her. Don’t tell her ahead of time, don’t discuss your intentions with her, and don’t give her any indication anything’s going on. If you reveal your intentions she will do everything in her power to fuck you over before you can make the first move. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/10/23 03:34 PM |
| 8 | Wife's father died and she had midlife crisis / mental breakdownRead “the Rational Male: Religion”. There’s a whole chapter about how and why women lean on religion, spirituality, etc as a manipulation tactic and way to validate their feelings with bullshit.9 | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/10/23 05:05 PM |
| 33 | It's always one straw that breaks the camel back...This is classic “I lost respect for my husband and am bored” type of behavior. The answer is almost always to focus on yourself. Lift weights, make some new friends, and put time into a hobby. Whatever you do, don’t focus on her | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/10/23 02:45 PM |
| 5 | Slow burnThen skip doing the work and get her ass out so you can start your life over. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/10/23 02:01 AM |
| 8 | Slow burnAs they say, the “go plan” is the “stay plan”. Act like you’re a single man trying to improve your life. Lift weights, eat better, and learn to be completely unaffected by her moods. Just walk away or ignore her when she’s being a bitch. One of the biggest things for me was to realize she can’t do anything besides take your money or falsely accuse you of something. Certainly severe consequences, but once you’ve accepted those things, there isn’t a lot she can do to hurt you. Bad moods, yelling, … | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/10/23 12:10 AM |
| 2 | Single for years after divorceWe’re all here because we’ve got problems with our significant other, and I’ll start by saying it sucks about your situation. No one wants a manipulative and controlling wife. But yank on your balls and make sure they’re still there. First off, people can and do train for 30 min a day at home - consistency > time. Second, just refuse to be emotionally manipulated. Take time for yourself. Women will respect you more for it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/10/23 07:27 PM |
| 3 | Single for years after divorceI don’t disagree but you’re putting a lot of this on her. It’s up to the man to maintain his fitness, hobbies, etc. If you honestly don’t have the balls to tell your wife that you need 30 minutes a day to do your push-up/pull-up routine and she needs to watch the kids, then your relationship is fucked from the start. My wife has never questioned my fitness time after I drew the boundary once. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/10/23 06:55 PM |
| 15 | Single for years after divorceI’m on the path to divorce so disqualify my opinion of you want since I’m not technically divorced. So many guys think because their wife said “yes” and they had kids they get to drop everything. Hobbies, fitness, good habits, etc. The average man in the US is pitifully weak, poorly groomed, and has nothing interesting going on. Buying a pull up bar or gym membership and getting to a lean state, looking clean, and having a hobby or two that puts you out there will put you above 60% of guys who a… | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/10/23 12:04 PM |
| 1 | Seriously thinking about abandonging my kidsHave you ever held a job that required a lot of mental resilience to bullshit? Or done something really “grindy” when you were younger? My guess is if you did, it wasn’t enough to really prepare you for the real grind of kids and day to day life. Kids are grindy. You either change your mindset to tolerate or enjoy it, or you don’t and feel you wasted your time. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/10/23 11:54 AM |
| 2 | Seriously thinking about abandonging my kidsI mean, mental stress and boredom is definitely part of being a dad. At those young ages, it’s most of it. If you’re looking for this sub to tell you “yeah fuck dem kids” I don’t think you’ll find it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/10/23 11:41 AM |
| 6 | Do I tell the kids even though my wife is forbidding it?She’s just trying to protect her reputation. It’s your word versus hers now, they’re grown enough to know why. I’d tell them. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/10/23 12:13 PM |
| 18 | My boyfriend (30M) broke up with me after I admitted that I (38F) lied about me and my co-worker. he broke up with me, how can I win him back?He deserves way better than a woman who will invite men over while in a committed relationship and then lie about it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/10/23 01:51 AM |
| 13 | FrustratedShe’s not ready to file because she hasn’t found someone better yet. Rest east that when she does, a light switch will turn off and a demonic she-monster will emerge. It’s called monkey branching. She’s trying to swing to the next branch (the next guy) but hasn’t been able to yet. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/10/23 05:47 PM |
| 41 | You can really tell who the Walk-Away Wives are on r/divorce, can't you?There’s going to be a substantial shift in the way men respond to the “next generation” of marriage. If feminism and the “Eat Pray Love” was the punch, then just not getting married will be the counter punch. Women will say men aren’t stepping up to commitment, and men will agree and say it’s because of their lack of long-term ability to commit to vows. It can’t just work to benefit one side for 30+ years. Now that women feel they can feel justified to shut off intimacy for no reason other than … | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/09/23 02:07 AM |
| 21 | Why won't married women have sex?From empirical observation and from everything I’ve read in evolutionary biology, it comes down to this: Women have short term and long term mating strategies. They wanna fuck jacked bad boy Chad quick and privately. They wanna marry safe Kevin to for security and provisioning, and maybe make babies with him or trick him into raising Chad’s kids. Safe Kevin wasn’t intended to be more than a 5 year thing though. We’re programmed with a “mate ejection” process. Typically this happens when a man wi… | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/09/23 12:22 PM |
| 8 | Blowing it up for a dead bedroom and no loveIMO you need to live life like you’re single for 6 months to a year. Lift weights, optimize your diet, improve your social life, work hard at your job, and most importantly, focus on your boys. Women like marketing, not direct sales. If after the 6 month period of doing better you aren’t seeing change in her, have the talk. She needs to know you can do better, but you also need to see you can do better. So many guys think they can take off their ring and start a harem and instead are hit with a … | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/09/23 02:26 PM |
| 11 | How do you keep your head up when she’s doing so well and your life is a mess because you invested everything on her?I think you realize the problem with focusing entirely on a woman now. Focus on your goals and getting back on track. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/09/23 03:07 PM |
| 1 | Marriage is undefeated in killing libido and it appears there's nothing I can do to stop itThis is a great response, thank you for the write-up. I think there's a temptation to think there's always something more that can be done without considering diminishing returns, but I agree with you that there are a few more things (therapy, give her a timeline with an actual date to expect improvement by, understand what I can do for her, etc) that are worth doing before I blow up the family. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/09/23 05:27 PM |
| 2 | Women's brain are hard-wired to blame men. Just accept it as a fact.I challenge you to go over to r/deadbedrooms and find a story like this on the front page. And then, go find the story of a husband saying “Life was good, I got married and had kids, and now my wife won’t have sex with me - she won’t even touch me”. Spoiler: you’ll find that story literally every other post. It’s insane how common it is. In other words, the hot progressive wife who tries to help the husband improve is so rare. If she’s an attractive woman, she can find something else easily, and… | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/09/23 03:00 PM |
| 4 | Is there a scientific or evolutionary reason so many women are so negative towards their husbands after kids?I don’t buy that. We’re all stressed. Statistically, globally, we’re all way more strung out than we ever have been. | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/08/23 02:25 AM |
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