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ExceptionalSea Archive

View 1 posts and 47 comments by ExceptionalSea on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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ADVICEExceptionalSea/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 12:32 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

Look up Fit4Mom or Stroller Strides to see if there’s a group near you! It’s a mom’s work out group that you bring your baby/kids to. It’s a great place to meet other moms and most of them are SAHMs too. I actually made a great mom friend through Facebook and she is so outgoing she’s subsequently introduced me to a bunch of other mom friends that I’m now friends with, some of them that she met at Stroller Strides! I’ve gone a few times and it’s fun but I haven’t been consistent enough to make my…
/r/RedPillWives05/02/20 05:43 AM
2

Wow, I wouldn’t have thought of this. Thanks for the insight!
/r/RedPillWives05/01/20 11:35 PM
3

Agreed with the small steps. I also gained 30-40# then lost it in grad school. I started by committing to logging all the calories I ate every day. Once that became a habit (after a few weeks) I committed to eating at least one healthy homemade meal a day (ie veggies rice protein) then I later started limiting my calories, etc etc. I never felt deprived or like I was giving stuff up because I made small goals and once they became a habit added on to them. In the span of 2 years I I lost the 30-4…
/r/RedPillWomen04/01/20 08:20 AM
2

Of course! I wasn’t suggesting you do anything actually, I hope that wasn’t implied by my post. Just giving you anecdotes of people in my life!
/r/RedPillWives02/01/20 08:33 PM
2

I’m pregnant with my second and when #2 arrives I’ll essentially have 2 babies, my first will only be 13 months older than my second. We are looking to hire a part time nanny to help out. What should I look for, any advice in hiring nannies?
/r/RedPillWives31/12/19 09:04 AM
3

Some good anecdotes for you - my doctor got married at 35 after she had an established career and still had 6, yes 6!, children, so it is awesome you can provide that stability. One of my best mom friends got pregnant first round of IVF after a year of trying naturally and with other medical issues. She has a beautiful 1 year old now! Not that you have to get IVF, just that others are successful even with medical things going on!
/r/RedPillWives31/12/19 09:01 AM
2

🤞🏽 I think you will get pregnant again just fine. It took a bit longer for another friend who is 33 on her third but she is coming along pregnant just fine now! The fact you’ve already had 2 proves your body can do it. And I don’t think 34 is over the hill; you’re in your 30s and have proven you are “fertile”. It seems moms who have already given birth don’t seem to have trouble getting pregnant until they’re in their 40s when it seems it drops off faster.
/r/RedPillWives31/12/19 08:55 AM
2

It’s entirely plausible and possible to date for 2 years and realize you’re really not compatible. The beginning stages of a relationship you are still getting to know each other, I could absolutely see one partner vaguely saying “I don’t know if I want more kids” - maybe that person themselves doesn’t know/isn’t entirely sure but it becomes more clear as the relationship deepens or lasts for a longer amount of time. Sometimes too you get to know a person much better over the 2 years and you fin…
/r/RedPillWomen18/12/19 09:34 AM
1

Thank you for this. It sounds like it would be potentially too offending to say it in this manner. This is the article I read that sparked my thinking about it which is in a similar tone. https://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2015/01/23/childless-with-regret-and-advice-dont-wait-for-the-perfect-picture/
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 04:12 PM
1

Lol I know not everyone thinks like me, which is why I brought this up. Yes it is possible they are planning other things not to my knowledge. Again, I was taking what they say at face value. For my friends who I specifically know are prioritizing other things and children aren’t even on their radar, I completely support them and don’t mention kids at all because why would I? This is only in the context of my friends who have brought it up and expressed ambivalence and I just want them to take t…
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 03:58 PM
2

Thank you for your reply. It’s true that we have to let our loved ones live their own lives and just be there for them.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 03:53 PM
1

Yes, as I’ve said before this is not something I bring up or harass them with. These are 2 way conversations that my friends equally bring up. And I’ve never said anything besides the comment, “everyone says there’s no right time”.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 03:51 PM
2

Thank you for your logical reply and for understanding I’m not out to attack anyone. I had been taking what they said at face value and not considering I wasn’t hearing the whole truth. I will continue to just tell my friends I love and support them no matter what they do and leave it at that.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 03:49 PM
3

Thank you for your reply and for understanding where I’m coming from in all this. It seems there’s a fine line between acknowledging whatever struggles they have going on that I don’t know about as well if I do happen to say something. I do have a friend that was in her late 30s, had to do IVF and she was successful, so that helps add a positive spin. I’m starting to think if I say anything at all it should just be something vague like “it’s totally okay to take time to yourself to think about i…
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 04:52 AM
3

What? I said I conceded your point? That was something I hadn’t thought of so it was good you pointed it out? I’m not sure how I’m not taking your advice? Here’s the thing, I guess up until this point I have been too trusting in the close intimacy of my friendships and that what they’ve been telling me, unasked, is true. And I’ll continue to believe what they say when they tell me they’re still on birth control, they’re not sure if they want kids, it might not be the right time, etc until they t…
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 04:20 AM
3

I concede your point about leaving it alone when they bring it up.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 03:29 AM
1

Okay, I understand what you’re saying. My first instinct at the time was not to say anything, so I didn’t, and I guess I was right. I guess I was just wondering if in the moment of conversation, or if the person were to bring it up again, if there was anything else I could have said. This isn’t something that I’m constantly thinking about or that I plan on bringing up with my friends as an intervention type thing - this was a purely in the moment when they are talking about it sort of thing. And…
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 01:55 AM
1

IRL is great too of course, all of my previous relationships were men I’d met through work, friends or school. Those sources start to dry up as we get older though lol! Getting involved with some sort of co-Ed hobby and meeting with a public group works well too. (Ie board game group, running group, etc)
/r/RedPillWives14/03/19 04:44 AM
3

I met mine online dating, on Tinder! Online dating can be a good tool to meet a lot of people, and then of course from there you have to do your own vetting. Have you heard of the dating advice guy, Evan Marc Katz? He’s got free blog articles with some good advice in this realm. I thought it was super helpful in terms of vetting... and also opening my eyes to men I didn’t think were for me originally... that’s how I met my man!
/r/RedPillWives14/03/19 01:59 AM
5

I laughed at the other comments saying you should just start doing it yourself, but I think they’re right. Hopefully he will see you doing something he knows he’s supposed to do and will step right in and finish the job. I read somewhere else, though I can’t remember what dating advice book it was, but another way is to pretend you are going to get someone else to do it, whether it be a contractor or your brother or a male friend... say “oh honey I know you’ve been so busy and this really needs …
/r/RedPillWives14/03/19 12:10 AM
2

Same! I find once every other week is plenty. Especially if like others posted you limit the amount of belongings you have and keep a decluttered home, much easier to make it cozy and keep up with daily maintenance.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 02:06 AM
3

I don’t think it’s going to work for this trip. As a parent, I can understand where he’s coming from. You want to give your kids the best and most experiences and spend time with them and this is what he wants to do. You’re not going to win for this trip. BUT, I’d approach him about planning something for just the 2 of you at another time. If he insists on taking the kids on big trips like that you could suggest a shorter more local trip to start that he wouldn’t feel like the kids were missing …
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 01:52 AM
1

That’s great, continue to be supportive! I think you guys can get through this.
/r/RedPillWomen11/03/19 04:06 AM
2

I think everyone is being a bit harsh. This too, shall pass I think. You got married and started a family life young, and now you are in the throes of it with young kids that need constant care-taking. In a few years when your children are self sufficient and going to school you and your husband will have much more time to just being yourselves again. He’s having a hard time because (from what I hear, I only just have a baby) this is the greatest commitment timewise in raising a family. Yes, the…
/r/RedPillWomen10/03/19 05:21 PM
3

I immediately thought this too. But I have no experience with very religious/conservative dating or courting, just mainstream “regular” dating and this timeline seems slow as molasses to me.
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/19 07:29 PM
2

Tinder! Haha, yes, it all depends on how you use it. I have several other friends who found serious relationships on there as well. What’s funny is we went on our first date and then didn’t date (I ended the date after one drink thinking I wasn’t interested). A year later I was still randomly thinking about him (we’d had a deep conversation and some things he’d said resonated) and I thought, if I’m still thinking about this random dude I should message him and I tracked down his number on my pho…
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/19 03:47 AM
1

Yep, it shouldnt be just on you to keep the convo going. People generally like to talk about themselves. To add to that you can always talk about yourself a bit to open the conversation more before asking a question again. “Oh you have a cat. I do too, I got him off craigslist...this this and this happened when I got him. I was totally scared to use craigslist but I love my cat peanut butter so much now. Where’d you get yours?” Etc. Now that you’ve said a little about yourself the other person c…
/r/RedPillWomen26/12/18 07:45 AM
5

Thank you for this very real, mature answer. 🙏🏽 I see so many people in this forum getting worked up on age or n count or something nitpicky and do not get told enough that real, mature men actually do want a real partner that might have a little life experience and passion for something.
/r/RedPillWomen20/12/18 08:47 PM
8

This. I’m surprised that others haven’t mentioned or noticed this. A well funded, well staffed public school in a good neighborhood is leaps and bounds ahead of other schools, public or private, and in my opinion what parents can provide at home. I went to one of these school systems and the amount of opportunities I had was endless. I took such specialized classes such as sewing and fashion design, journalism, etc and my peers had access to very high level math and science classes, acting etc a…
/r/RedPillWives19/12/18 06:39 PM
13

Wow, I’ve never really thought of this but I’d like to play: Mani/pedis - probably about 8-10 of these combined a year, let’s round to $50 for each time (overestimating a bit, i don’t get a pedi every time) so about $500 Haircut and color - I get a high end cut and color but only go 1-2x a year, let’s round to $500 Shampoo/bath products - organic, mid to higher end products $300 Skincare - very simple routine, face wash, eye cream, moisturizer, sunscreen, organic products $150 Eyebrows/upper lip…
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/18 05:43 AM
2

This sounds like us at the moment! Even though I’ve also been working full time he does pay for everything while I pay my student loans - and the rest of the time I take care of everything around the house. We have a baby due next month and now I’ll be able to stay at home. We’re already engaged and getting married next Christmas (had some family medical things going on). It’s not for everyone but it can work if the situation is right for you!
/r/RedPillWomen14/12/18 03:48 PM
3

Yeah there are pros and cons for sure. I’m also on the west coast where there are lot of singles well into their 30s so there is a larger pool to date from. Might be a bit harder if you’re in the Midwest or not an urban area or something. Cons - there’s a fertility clock, it’s harder for you to stay as hot as you were in your early to mid 20s, you might have some baggage, others in your dating age range might have baggage Pros - men you will attract/be suitable for are in their mid to late 30s a…
/r/RedPillWomen12/12/18 04:17 AM
8

I started dating my man at age 30. I’m 31 now, engaged, with a baby on the way and he provides enough that I will be a stay at home mom when the baby comes. He was 37, never married, no kids when we started dating. The fact that I was 7 years younger than him really helped as he wants a big family. What if you wait until you’re 33, 34, 35 etc and that late 30s man really wants someone a bit younger to start a family with (even if you say you don’t want kids now). Stop wasting your time in a situ…
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/18 09:12 PM
9

Why do you HAVE to do anything (ie take on a “second shift”) when he obviously doesn’t HAVE to work? At a certain point you need to stand up for yourself. Yes, RPW has some ideals including supporting your man, etc, but that’s not at the expense of not being supported yourself. You said you really want a traditional relationship and to be able to stay at home, is your boyfriend providing that or not? How are you moving towards that in your life at this very moment? There’s also a general rule of…
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/18 08:52 PM
18

I’m probably not one who should answer this because I will be blunt and mean, but I would get out. Are you getting what you want out of this relationship? The whole idea of RPW is an equal exchange based on our natural talents, and the man should provide while the woman takes care of the home front. Granted in this day and age, it often takes 2 incomes to make it work. In that case I may be getting into “blue pill” territory but if a woman has to provide income for the family then I think the ma…
/r/RedPillWomen10/12/18 08:00 PM
3

Well said! 👏🏽
/r/RedPillWives10/12/18 06:31 AM
1

Just curious, what do you mean when you say we can’t afford a man who has as much earning potential? I’m not arguing against it, just honestly don’t understand what you mean by it 😊
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/18 10:19 PM
8

To me it sounds Iike he just saw you as an option and is probably dating other women. I have to disagree with the other posters here about the whole kissing/cuddling thing. I don’t think engaging in that on the second date changed/affected his feelings for you, I think you guys were just getting to know each other and again, he probably is dating or considering other women as well. I wouldn’t worry about the whole “should I have made out with him or not” scenario, that’s overkill. For whatever r…
/r/RedPillWomen05/12/18 07:53 PM
2

All good advice. Not just for RP dating, but in general it helps to have some interests or hobbies listed or displayed in your photos (doesn’t have to be a ton). Men would typically comment on these things as an activity we could do together or something they also enjoyed. Makes a good conversation starter and also helps to advertise what you are looking for. For example, I was looking for an outdoorsy, active man, and that’s what I had in my photos/interests...and that’s what I got! ☺️
/r/RedPillWives02/12/18 06:33 PM
2

Mine was a complete surprise. We’d only been dating for about 4-5 months and took a trip to Hawaii. It was wonderful, we did a helicopter tour, had a spa day, went hiking, stayed at a nice hotel, and he popped the question with the ring while we were hanging out in the hotel room. I was very surprised to say the least! We’re both in our 30s so after we started dating for awhile and found we clicked and really liked each other we just started hanging out more and more and became serious. We’re st…
/r/RedPillWomen23/11/18 06:19 AM
3

Right? Agreed!
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 11:08 PM
10

Yes, thank you for this.. The second kind of high value men you mentioned are the type I tend to date, and literally the actual number never comes up. Of course they don’t want a slut, but there’s a huge difference from someone who’s been in several relationships and someone who sleeps with “the whole football team”. I get the sense that a lot of people on this sub seem to think an n count that is not 0 is the same as 100 🙄 which is totally not the case for many men who fall into the second cate…
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/18 05:14 AM
33

My RP man and I never discussed it. We are both in our 30s and have had several serious relationships each so it was understood that I would have some experience, but we kind of had a don’t ask don’t tell policy. Frankly, I think the n-count thing is a little overvalued online. I definitely think men care that you aren’t a huge sl*t (excuse my language), BUT I think the actual number is a small detail that is overlabored on. What’s the overall picture? Are you promiscuous and sleep with almost a…
/r/RedPillWomen10/11/18 03:06 AM
1

I thought this was the best answer! Agreed.
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/18 10:27 PM
1

How old are you? I get the feeling you are both young/in a young relationship? I don’t want to be harsh, but serious LTRs, especially as you get older, typically have a progression where the couple increasingly spends more and more time together (hence why you see all these couples nowadays move in together before marriage). I don’t know any other details of your relationship, but I think you are right to want to spend more time with someone you’ve been dating for 2 years. It’s also time for YOU…
/r/RedPillWomen27/10/18 06:30 AM
22

Try not to attach expectations to this and enjoy the relationship for what it is right now - fun and getting to know you. You don’t know if this guy is the forever one yet, and you don’t know that from your side either. Right before I started dating my fiancé, I dated someone who I thought was “perfect” and would possibly be the man I would marry. That relationship blew up and I took awhile to lick my wounds. I started dating my fiancé and decided to just let things play out and not attach any e…
/r/RedPillWomen21/10/18 04:48 AM
1

Sounds like things are going well and it’s early, I’d wait a few weeks and just keep being yourself, easy and fun. My fiancé and I dated for about 1.5-2 months before we had the talk, and I know part of the reason he brought it up is we were having a lot of fun and I was leaving on a trip with a co-Ed group of friends and he wanted to lock it down when he realized there might be other guys around. Just be patient!
/r/RedPillWomen20/10/18 06:28 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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