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ExistentialJelly Archive

View 3 posts and 345 comments by ExistentialJelly on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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23

People do not understand how damn exhausting running a household is and minimize stay at home mothers'/wives' contributions. The fact she is still even preparing food for him is beyond. I would go full beast and tell him to go ahead and starve.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/22 10:07 PM
52

It sucks when those we care about stick with a guy who is obviously taking them for a ride. My friend is ring shopping with a guy who hasn't finalized his divorce and there is no date in sight for it being dealt with. I love her, but this guy is wasting her time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 04:47 AM
103

I'm in my early 30's and trying for a baby. While I would love to have a daughter, I am terrified of having one too after seeing what the dating culture has become.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/22 04:19 PM
42

I've gotten weird messages before regarding being in this sub. People have asked for my female perspective on their relationship issues, advice on how to get girls, if I wanted to talk. My best guess is they want to "interview" you to take snippets out of context and post in anti-FDS subs for laughs. This sub is not well received across a large portion of reddit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/22 05:52 PM
143

See, that's the point. These guys aren't dating women for long term partnerships, so they can't justify spending money because they know they are going to be spending the money on multiple women in an attempt to get laid. "Why would I spend money on someone I just want to bang a couple times?" My husband never lets me pay and never lets my family pay when we go out together. Does that mean I don't buy him things? Hell no, I buy him good gifts and if I am out and see something he needs or likes, …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/22 11:20 PM
53

Okay, I tried reading that and I couldn't. Just the way these guys speak about women is gross and unsettling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/22 07:25 AM
126

And these open relationship guys are acting like women are Costco samples.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 09:47 AM
7

The joke is that he's the joke.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/22 04:51 AM
98

That just sounds like a target he's obsessed with. Married? Successful? Intelligent? Loyal? He wants to be a combo breaker. He seems to like the idea of the challenge of being the guy who made a woman sacrifice and risk all of her accomplishments for him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/22 08:25 PM
32

My now husband would message me to make sure I had eaten. I had a tendency of getting busy with school and work and ended up forgetting my meals, so he would cook and drop off some lunch for me or come to my house and make me dinner and do some chores. Then he'd head back to his place. Feeling cared about even when we weren't in the same room was really nice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/22 07:20 PM
88

Nearly every woman I have met from that era has told me how much they regret getting married or being born in that time. They despise their husbands and feel like they lost out on life. It's actually really sad how it's idolized as the height of family perfection when so many of those who were forced to keep the image intact suffered.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/22 11:46 PM
125

My grandmother always told us about the 6 month rule. She said that 6 months is when the act tends to start showing cracks and you have to pay attention. Even if they are small and you second guess having actually seen them, they start to show. It's also why she said not to even entertain going on trips or vacations until after 6 months.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/22 07:59 PM
28

That's the hilarious part. These guys think these women are going to be submissive, but 9/10 times, I've seen these women completely dominate the marriage and the guys. I love the old UNO reverse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/22 03:58 PM
124

That seems really common, right? I keep seeing these guys totally wanting to marry an Asian woman for their fetish as they expect submissive wives from a culture different then their own, but get surprised and insulted that they are in fact from another culture with different customs. Like come on man, actually research and learn about your potential life partner's culture!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/22 10:06 PM
88

On the note of stalking, is anyone else tired of hearing love songs from guys who sound like a complete stalker or mind game player? Or seeing obsessive (oh, I mean, persistent) behaviour for guys to convince the girl to date them in movies or shows? It's so engrained into society that it's a romantic trope!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/22 06:44 AM
423

Damn shorts! Ruining the moral fiber of upstanding men who just want their houses cleaned. He's truly the victim here. #endthetryannyofshorts
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/22 08:00 PM
27

I'm the same, they are dead to me. I've grown and learned from those relationships and they no longer serve me, so I don't reminisce or mention them. I've resolved what happened in my time and my terms. Also, a HVM who is secure in himself and the relationship won't need to discuss them if they aren't effecting the current relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/22 05:52 PM
399

No... I refuse to let this take up brain space. I refuse to accept this as reality. No...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/22 05:39 AM
821

This is so true. In the old days I let a guy make me sleep on the floor when I had my period as they grossed him out. Then I met my husband, I expected similar menstrual issues as every guy I had dated previously was weird about periods, so I thought all guys would be. I went through a time where my period became super heavy and I couldn't use tampons or my cup, so I was stuck using pads. Well, something shifted in the night and my husband woke me up to an absolute crime scene. The bed sheets we…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/22 08:34 PM
158

And then he goes and behaves in a way that explains why so many women need to have secret finances in case things go sideways.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/22 05:28 PM
56

We were both like, hell nah. Our mom was huge on true crime documentaries when we were growing up, so she really instilled the true dangers guys were capable of. She's the type of mother who isn't paranoid or raising you in fear, but she is also sending you emails with YouTube videos on how to break out of various types of car trunks in case you get kidnapped.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/22 03:39 PM
135

I remember when I kicked my ex out. I went and hid out somewhere he couldn't get to me until he could be picked up by his father. He kept trying to invite me to come see him so he could apologize. The words he used were concerning. "One last date" "Treat you the way you deserve" Things like that. It was hella creepy and his own father told me not to go back as I was in real danger of being harmed due to his past behaviour. Or when my sister told a guy she didn't want to get intimate and he kept …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/22 03:12 PM
7

For the "young at heart" men
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 09:52 PM
187

McDonald's had a Valentine's Special this year. It was a love nugget. It was legit one extra nugget to share with your loved one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 01:18 AM
15

That's the thing I wished I had paid closer attention to in the early stages. He was very disconnected with his family and always had stories to tell about how awful every single person was. It's like if he says every ex is crazy, he's the crazy one. His dad took us fishing once and his dad and I were on the boat alone and he told me the truth about stuff. Said he loved his son, but knew he was damaged and warned me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 12:44 AM
12

He tried 6 months ago through Facebook to see if I wanted photos he had on his phone. Dude, it's been almost 6.5 years and I'm married and living my best life now. Block, delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 12:22 AM
20

Omg I wish he would have left on his own. Grown ass man couldn't drive and was unemployed for 2 years citing unchecked mental health issues. I had to call his dad because I was just done. He had another meltdown and just was getting violent, so I left. I called his dad who then arranged to come pick him up a couple days later when he had a day off from work, but told me absolutely not to go back to the apartment as my ex had a history of violence that I had not known about before. So I pretended…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 11:14 PM
46

That first night just...is felt right to the core. Have you seen that Julia Roberts movie, "Sleeping with the Enemy"? She has a controlling/abusive husband and she faked her death. Seeing it before and after my bad relationship really hits differently. There is one scene in particular that gets me. She was putting away cans in her new home and by habit made it perfect, like her husband demanded or else he would abuse her. Then it clicked for her that he was gone and she made it messy and felt so…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 08:43 PM
98

Omg it was amazing! He always made up fake food allergies (it was always foods I loved, like seafood and his own father called him out that he didn't have any food allergies) and refused to get help for his mental health issues. So for all those years I could only have foods he liked (pizza, burgers, chicken fingers) because of his "allergies". The night he was out of my apartment after I kicked him out(his own father and brother helped me get rid of him), I deep cleaned my entire apartment to g…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 08:33 PM
112

Ah yes, I did this. It was supposed to be a short term thing while his apartment got cleaned for mold as the landlord never took care of the property and the city literally had to get involved to make her fix the place(this was verified). Dude didn't tell me that he actually gave notice to move out and I let it slide. $43,000, my credit score, sanity, and 4 years were wasted. 2 months is not enough time to know if someone is compatible enough to live together.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 07:48 PM
113

It's a lot less exhausting then being in a relationship that is draining you emotionally, mentally, physically, and financially. I wasted 4 years and a good $45,000 on a bad relationship with a guy I "gave a chance" to. Oh, and a tanked credit score that I'm still recovering from..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 07:08 PM
50

I'm married, but dang, I didn't realize how many low value men I kept around as friends in my life. They always check in to see how my relationship is going and when they don't get the answer they want, they go silent. Ick. So I block now... there is no friendship to salvage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 04:24 AM
8

My hobbies are always growing. Right now my main one is painting. Once I buy a house, I am going full blown homesteading and building. I'm excited to have a workshop to build things in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 04:22 AM
60

And this is why Valentine's day is bogus to me. Low effort people use it as a way to make up for an entire year as a lackluster partner and try to earn enough romance credit in one day to coast them through the year. She didn't leave him because of one bad Valentine's Day, she left because it's part of a cycle. Friends aren't making those comments due to one bad day. And yoni egg? If she asked for one, then okay, I guess, but if she didn't, how did he come to that idea? Also really bad for inser…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 03:58 AM
41

And this is so recent. After decades of studies and proof have shown how this stuff typically plays out, the woman is still not beloved and written off as emotional. Yet people the to argue that it's all in the past.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/22 11:36 PM
3

Don't.have.babies.with.boyfriends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/22 10:31 PM
136

If she did leave her fiance for him, I'd bet money he loses interest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/02/22 10:27 PM
17

My mom was married to a cop. We had to spend a night in a safe house after he threatened to put a bullet between my eyes because I called the tv dumb when it was malfunctioning. I was 12 and he's still a cop!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/22 04:13 AM
43

My mom was single and worked multiple part time jobs. She used the tactic of saying that it allowed for her to have a more open schedule to be there for us kids and our schedule.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/22 03:02 AM
495

She sounds more like a pimp than a match maker...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/22 03:58 PM
47

I'm married and have been since before finding FDS, but now I notice LVM crazy fast. It has changed my view on a lot of marriages in my married friend circle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/22 02:19 PM
76

The stronger to woman, the more a weak man wants her to yield to him. It's a friggen kink to them, I swear. They don't want just any woman who is submissive from the get-go, they want to get the satisfaction of breaking a strong woman, much like breaking a wild horse. They want the majestic being to be controlled.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/22 04:18 PM
96

I would not date if I was a single mother. I've seen way too many A&E documentaries and read too many personal stories about abuse from a mother's boyfriend. I also refuse to post my children online.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 11:47 PM
9

Honestly, no. I have found some of the absolute least desirable men have the most well-established confidence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 09:58 PM
20

My aunt was married for 30+ years. She was a stay-at-home wife and homeschooled her children at her husband's insistence. She has a high school education and no work experience. He was in a profession which required constant travel and with such, he had multiple secret affairs spanning the entirety of their marriage. She recently found out about one long-term affair partner with whom he plotted to maximize their finances from their respective marriages and to disappear together. She applied for …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/22 09:56 PM
17

Yes, there is. I use wine.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 10:26 PM
9

If you can't laugh during sex... it just ain't intimate. When your bodies are sticky and up against each other and movement causes a loud fart sound and you can't laugh and kiss, and keep going, it's just lacking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 09:24 PM
7

One dude literally asked me how much I would be approved for on a mortgage on the first date. Then he texted me like crazy with life building plans. Turn out he broke up with a long term girlfriend of 5 years just 2 weeks before our first date... and apparently just didn't want to have a hiccup in his plans and any girl would do to fill that role. Like what? I haven't even held your hand and you want me to co-sign a mortgage?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 09:22 PM
21

I despise the whole, "Well you aren't being beaten, so you aren't abused." justification. Abuse comes in so many forms and have smaller, less obvious starting points.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 09:15 PM
66

I had to google what a throat goat was... that is just... so embarrassing and trashy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 09:10 PM
38

I am planning to get pregnant this year with baby #1. Do you know what my husband is doing? Reading the books, watching youtube videos with me, and telling me straight up that everything pregnancy-related is 100% my say as I am the one experiencing it. He asks I just tell him what I need and he will get it (massage chair, home cleaning service, etc). These conversations need to be had before the condom even comes off. This really needs to be normalized conversational topics before people even ge…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 08:22 PM
54

When I was in the midst of kicking out my abusive ex, I was speaking to him on the phone. I asked him why he has never changed although I had asked him multiple times to get his shit together. I called him out for witnessing me killing myself to support us and how I aged a good decade because of it. Do you know what he said? "I never thought you would actually leave." And that right there was the day I stopped tolerating nonsense men and full stop starting calling my friends out when they were r…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/22 07:24 PM
18

I guess the other term is bang maid. A wife who fulfills the role of taking care of the house like his mother does, but he can actually have sex with her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/22 12:06 AM
4

Dated for a year until engaged, then COVID delayed wedding plans for a year and a half. No children yet, hopefully soon. I don't want to go too far into my personal details as I like the anonymity of the internet, but I know I am extremely fortunate in my situation in that both of our families will be helping with childcare while I finish med-school. I do believe it comes down to the individuals at the end of the day. Someone who is a lousy boyfriend who won't wash dishes or gets upset that his …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/22 12:05 AM
18

I'm happily married and I love this sub. It helps embolden me as a person to be more confident in myself, hold myself to a higher standard, and not feel guilty for wanting what I want. FDS has helped me reign in my habit of people-pleasing which comes from childhood neglect and abusive codependent relationships. I will not apologize for feeling empowered in myself or for gaining confidence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 10:28 PM
307

The men who are shaming women for nudes and sex tapes are the same men who create countdowns for when a female celebrity will become 18 and publically acceptable to sexualize.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 08:23 PM
41

My husband is Indian and he actively says not to date desi men. He has gone against the cultural norm in so many ways that he is often mocked for turning white. His warnings are: -Usually coddled by mommy and needs a mommy they can sleep with -Cheating is common and so is the use of prostitution because they don't respect women. The wife is for babies and the home, other women are for fun -Lazy and won't do chores, cook, or help with kids -Weird pack mentality that they always have to impress th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 08:20 PM
42

That's usually my answer. I also tell them to look at the readily available statistics. "Not all men, but enough to be a serious concern."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 08:12 PM
32

90% of the men I have met with this mindset don't even go to the gym. The others may go, but they skip leg day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 08:10 PM
59

Or they like to buy flashy cars that are impractical on gas and which stretch their budget to the point of breaking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 08:08 PM
21

If I were to find myself single again, I absolutely would not date single fathers. I don't care if I have children or not, I have witnessed enough chaos from my friends and family dating single fathers that I would refuse to put myself or hypothetical children into that mess. I don't get these men who also seem to think they have a right to lie or ignore the boundary of not dating someone else with kids and try anyways because, "You said no children, but you can't possibly be telling the truth b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 07:47 PM
9

Gotta love men telling women what will turn women off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 06:59 AM
18

I had this conversation with my now-husband before we even got a month into dating. Then the conversation got more in-depth before the engagement took place. If a guy is serious about being in a relationship, he won't shy away from the conversations that need to happen before starting a life with someone. I don't get how guys think it's in any way amusing, mysterious, or attractive to refuse to have in-depth, serious conversations with potential spouses. I ain't wasting my years on a maybe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/22 04:41 AM
5

My friend has convinced herself she can't get out of her current situation, even when my husband and I have offered. She keeps getting with these absolute scumbags because she has convinced herself she can't do better. It is so frustrating because the guy she is with right now is so infuriating, selfish, and is a total no ambition small-town loser who she is willing to throw money out for in a hope of a home and partnership. She is beautiful, intelligent, capable, and talented. It sucks to see h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/01/22 11:50 PM
54

India also just raised the legal marriage age for girls from 18 to 21. It has been good to see these changes coming in and the men are acting like the women are going to suffer from not marrying them? The critical thinking skills are just... lacking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/22 07:02 PM
55

I worked in hotels for 6+ years and I saw way too much and honestly think the normalization of porn and sex work is too much. Common responsibilities I had in my role were to make sure the guest computers were wiped clean (because of porn and affair websites. This was. A public space where anyone, any age could walk in on them), make sure movies were charged to the bill (we can see what you watch and for how long. The guys who ordered a lot of porn would watch for like <5minutes and then dispute…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 06:02 PM
87

There is one sub I had to stop visiting because it just got me so frustrated because of these types of scenarios. "My husband is unemployed, doesn't do chores, won't look after the kids, and took $$$$$ out of my account to buy something for himself/his family/friend. When I got upset, he said I was abusive. Am I wrong for feeling upset?" And they proceed to defend and justify these guys and their crap behaviour. A lot of men will ditch their wife/girlfriend in an instant just to get a different …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 05:32 PM
136

I know a woman who was married to a man for about 20 years and divorced him, got a cute lil' house (like those ones from the 90's movies where women strike out on their own) and began dating a woman. She told her new girlfriend straight up that they would NEVER live together and there was maximum number of days she was allowed to sleep over. She was married for 20 years and was a wife, a mother, and she was never herself and she was not willing to lose herself to a relationship again. They've be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 09:13 PM
144

Same. I had no idea what was happening and he started to choke me. My natural reaction wasn't, "Oh baby! Yeah that's so hot!" It was to reach for my clock on my bedside table and hit him in the head.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 08:02 PM
187

I caught that instantly. Important enough to use in an argument, not important enough to commit to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 04:37 AM
21

I had to change all my details when I kicked my abusive ex out. I changed my phone number, email addresses, accounts, and deleted all social media. He kept creating new ones and coming at me. Once I deleted and changed everything, he started to call my parents house. He texted my sister too. My dad and sister told him right off and blocked him. He then started to mail stuff to my parents house. The police said there was nothing they could do as he lived in another town now and didn't directly th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/22 04:41 PM
148

Also, who were the common traded commodity for the sake or peace between families/kingdoms? Women! Women were actual bartered goods when guys couldn't figure their stuff out or if they wanted to extend peace.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/22 04:36 PM
19

Oh yeah. When I was 18 I dated a guy who was 24 and he would always tell me what was wrong with me and would follow it up with how I was young and so needed guidance. Guess who provided that guidance? It really messed me up for years. Now I'm married to a HVM and communication is huge in our relationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/22 04:17 PM
4

My husband comes from a heavy arranged marriage culture and this has been a discussion for us before. He despises the practice and thus went against it by marrying me. His colleagues and friends are so out of shape, poorly groomed, lazy, and whiny. They are often balding with weak jawlines and have pot bellies(even if thin by some weird way). Then their parents show them these profiles of beautiful, well groomed, highly educated women and the guys start to critique them. They want instagram mode…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/22 05:37 PM
7

It's so disgusting that he is willing to deny the existence of his children to get some booty. Those poor children. This type of guy is an absolutely terrible father and will be to any future children as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/22 05:09 PM
47

Icky. As far as I'm concerned, your sibling's partner is another sibling. It's just such a gross boundary overstep. Her poor sister. She was obsessed. She would stalk their Facebook to see what they were up to and would say the nastiest stuff about the wives while also stalking their social media. I distanced myself from her and she lost her mind in to a racist tirade against my now husband when I got engaged. Girl was unhinged.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/22 04:32 PM
10

Subtly bring up topics to gauge their reaction. "I was watching this documentary/my friend just experienced/I heard this story/ did you see the news?" It's a way to broach the topic without outright asking and you haven't shown your reaction. But once sometime has passed, you need to be able to ask questions straight on before the relationship gets serious.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/22 04:17 PM
7

The amount of single moms I know is staggering. I was raised by one. They were men who wanted the babies and then once the reality set in, they bailed. No visitation, no phone calls, no child support. But whenever they do decide to come around, the courts make it illegal for my friends to deny visits. These guys are well over $20,000 behind in child support and living their lives with vacations, new girlfriends, buying homes, and new cars while the mom struggles to find childcare so they can wor…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/22 04:10 PM
81

Omg I ditched a friend like that years ago. She always went for married men and convinced herself she was this amazing goddess that men just couldn't control themselves around. It was a wild ride.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/22 03:27 PM
23

Or ones who have turned their parent's basement in to a creature swamp.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 05:18 PM
30

Oh he automatically stops hanging with anyone who speaks like this. These were business buddies/partners and it was a business hang out. If someone speaks like this, he stops hanging out outside of work stuff and stops speaking in any casual way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/21 04:16 AM
56

My husband was out with some guy friends and a woman at one of the shops gave my husband her number on her card. She asked if he'd like to get a drink. He said "No thanks, I'm married. But thank you for the flattery." and handed it back. His buddies then tried to tell him he should have kept it and then told me how lucky I was that he wouldn't even take a girl's number. Um no... that's not lucky, that's my husband having some damn self respect. Honesty and communication is like the absolute bare…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/21 02:29 AM
2

Yup, that's the one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/21 10:25 PM
20

I joined a language partner site and thought there was no way it would be sexual. I was so, so wrong. Every potential language partner always turned to flirtatious. Hell, even a woman sent me her husband's dick pic and asked if I wanted to suck it as she watched. Um no honey, if you don't want your husband's stubby acorn to the point of outsourcing, why would anyone else?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 08:49 PM
2

I used to from the age of 13-27. He dated a really scary chick and she made him delete all female friends (married, single, elderly etc) and he disappeared. Even his mother and sister weren't allowed to call him unless she was present. They were on and off for a few years until he just packed up and left. She moved another guy in the next day. Then he just seemed to keep getting involved in weird stuff and weird relationships and disappeared. I stopped trying... been over a year now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 08:26 PM
8

This... made me think. I come from a redneck town of low achievers. I would always get hit on by these bush men who barely finished highschool and seemed unaware of grease removal soap to get the stains from their hands. But I dressed down. I wore jeans and T-shirts all the time. I had no confidence in myself and no future. I was barely able to afford rent and there were no jobs or options for education. Now I am married to a man who buys me designer purses a couple times a year, splurges on exp…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/21 07:07 PM
1

I am in my early thirties and married. If I found myself single again, I would be very unlikely to date again. However, if I did date again, I would not date someone with kids. I have witnessed far too much drama with that dynamic through friends, families, and aquantinces that I would never willing go through it. Divorced... that would be heavily dependent on the individual situation. I think it would require a different fine tuned vetting stragety just for divorcees.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/21 06:59 PM
133

I honestly made it like 10 lines in and had to stop reading it. That was bloody painful. Even in my pick me days I told guys to stop speaking to me if they couldn't type/talk properly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/21 06:37 PM
261

I never did understand how guys were so comfortable to post their wive's photos and have all these men leer and make comments on them. And those comment sections are always so depraved. It always reminded me of a county fair, where you display your prized hog to the judges.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/21 04:51 PM
145

Yup! I've gotten, "He doesn't need to know " "I bet I'm more fun." "Live a little." "I wasn't asking if you were single, come up to my room."(when I worked at a hotel. Omg the stories of sexual harrassment I have from that job...) 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/21 02:39 AM
280

I hate when men hit on me at my work. I can't just walk away because I can't abandon my post and I can't lose it on them because " customer service". And they NEVER take it seriously when I decline, say I'm married, or have a fricken wedding ring on. It's a challenge to them and I'm literally a captive audience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/21 02:18 AM
34

His small dick energy radiates through the screen.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/11/21 02:15 AM
34

I see you also watched Sweet Home Alabama.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 11:10 PM
69

Movies: here is a movie about an intelligent, powerful, highly skilled woman as the lead. For representation of women and women empowerment! Women: oh cool! Movies: she is highly skilled in martial arts and takes down elite mob members. She is wealthy by her own right, in great shape, and beautiful. Women: nice! Movies: She sleeps with some random stock exchange guy at the bar with a pencil neck, poorly fitted suit, and no charm whatsoever, but his one almost joke gets her moist. Women:..... The…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 06:19 PM
120

This was a question that bothered me back when I was dating. Why do so many men have only one towel? Why no garbage bin in the bathroom? Why one set of sheets that is stained from decades ago? Why is the fridge empty except for one lime, but the liquor cabinet is fully stocked? Why is there not even a single book or photo in their entire apartment? I've told my husband that should he go before me, I am seriously never dating again. I just can't do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 05:00 PM
121

I would honestly advise avoiding this place for a long while. Those questions were way too detailed and premeditated. He wanted to know how far in to wait, access and exit points, and timing. He also now knows her car. My mom taught me at a young age to never develop a routine in order to make it so creeps can't stalk me. It's hardwired now. I have multiple different routes home and alternate at random, I go jogging at different parks at different times of day on different days of the week, and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 05:23 AM
51

That's exactly what it portrays to me. It means a guy doesn't care enough to put effort in to his life and self care or put down any kind of roots. My husband had a bedframe when we met, sheet set, and always made his bed when he got up. His place was tidy and organized. That showed me that would be how he carry himself across all life departments and he does. I say this as someone without a bedframe right now and our mattress is on the floor because we are in between short term rentals right be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/21 06:24 PM
24

This has been an interesting topic between my husband and me. He comes from a country where porn is illegal and these types of things aren't depicted in media. I come from a country where this has been normalized. So when we watch something together, he will automatically skip these scenes. I was so confused at first, but then I learned he hated these scenes and how they are in every movie now. Then I realized just how prevalent they were. Having been so accustomed to it, I stopped noticing it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/21 05:45 PM
6

We are in the age of information. We literally have computers in our pockets. Good on your brother. One thing I find really attractive with my husband is his affinity for learning new skills. He is the superior cook but he is always watching how to do home or car repairs, how to build things, and how to garden. It has saved us a lot of money and I love doing these things together to build our home.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/21 04:24 PM
58

I tell women this all the time... scummy guys aren't original. They all show the same behaviour, use the same tactics, and attempt the same nonsense. They just do them at different speeds. It's like there is a dang manual.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/21 05:19 PM
16

Wasn't he also still married to Anna Ferris when we was flirting with this wife? Or he kept a very short gap between them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/21 04:27 PM
85

When a man says, "I don't know how to cook." What he means is... "I am too lazy and think it is someone else's (mainly a woman) responsibility to take care of me like my mother did. I refuse to read a cook book or watch YouTube videos or access any other easily accessible avenues of knowledge to learn a basic life skill because I view myself as better than others and deserving of servants."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/21 03:37 PM
59

It really sounds like this is him trying to isolate her from friends. So he's escalating but OP can't do much else beyond saying she's there for her friend should be come around.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/10/21 06:28 PM
539

My hoe phase is going to be learning how to garden.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 10:40 PM
3

I read this as, "Tell me about where I went wrong so I know what to hide from the next woman until I gain what I want from them." It's never for personal growth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/10/21 01:18 AM
74

I like to ask men who use that legacy line what their legacy is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 03:40 PM
25

I can see the response. "Don't tell me to leave him! He is perfect in every other way than this one thing!" 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 04:10 PM
5

A lot of the ladies here have given good advice. I'll just add some stuff for you to keep in mind. This comes from the combined experience of myself and friends and family. If you are intending to be a stay at home wife... Make sure you have a bank account that money is being deposited in to every month. You should be the only one with access. This is your security net in case of divorce. Never give up your independence and ability to support yourself. Depending on your career, it's always good …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 03:27 PM
362

Bet you that as soon as he wants something with a hefty price tag, he's getting it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 11:15 PM
65

Wow... that is a lot of insecurity right there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 08:14 PM
13

My advice is always to listen to your gut, keep lots of physical distance in your confrontation(over phone or email or have a trusted person with you in person), and get your finances and evidence in line before you even let them know you're on to them. I tell my friends all the time, I don't care if it's noon or 3am, call me and I will come get you. I'll drive all night to their town if I need to. Just be safe and stay away because the change of violence or death is too damn high.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 03:25 PM
42

Dude sounds like he needs to be neutered to calm him. Damn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 02:47 PM
6

Thank you so much. 💖
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 06:16 AM
6

I'm not great at this stuff, how do I block DM's? I keep getting guys trying to get a rise out of me. I just block and delete with no engagement, but it would be nice to not even have them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 05:54 AM
167

I also feel like a lot of guys need to know that affection is not sex. Affection is holding hands, kissing without intent of sex, cuddling on the couch watching bad TV, small acts of thought and kindness( flowers, making her favorite meal, a foot rub after running after kids all day)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/10/21 04:58 AM
145

I think it's funny that they don't actually realize that when they aren't consuming so much porn, they have time to focus on important parts of life such as hobbies, reading, increasing their skills. But they don't have that epiphany, "Oh man, was that how much time I was spending fapping?" Of course they feel clairvoyance and accomplishment when they aren't stuck in a room with the curtains drawn while they death grip their dick for the 4th time that morning instead of going out and interacting…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/21 05:26 PM
10

This also needs to be part of the conversation you have with potential spouses. My husband and I have agreed no social media accounts or phones for our kids. If we do get them a phone, it's going to be something like a flip phone for calling and texting in emergencies. Kids don't need I Instagram or tiktok... I was a child who grew up when home computers were still just staring out to be common and I was exposed to way too much and it was dangerous. I'm lucky I didn't become a statistic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 09:24 PM
10

Oh it will. It always does. Even if he did it once a week, $480x4=$1920 In 6 months that's $11,520. That's not sustainable. If he has already blown through the cost of a truck I worry for OP. He is also showing concerning levels of aggression and avoidance and deflection. He'll use joint then hers and say she can't say anything because it's for therapy so she can't withhold it. Here's the thing about these types of people, they aren't unique. They all follow the same route, just at a different p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 06:15 PM
36

I work in the automotive industry. So a new truck, bare basics is going to cost him like $26,000 for a 2019 model. Even used is insanely expensive right now because inventory is low due to COVID affecting production. So at a MINIMUM, this guy is spending about $20,000 on this. She needs to leave now before it can damage her security as they are married.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 05:24 PM
113

If I were her, I'd be checking the bank statements. Cam girls and therapists are not cheap. A mid range online therapist where I live is $120/hour, so a 4 hour session is $480... Multiple times a week, that's unrealistic. She's going to end up broke because of him. His behaviour is also lining up with that one guy who kept sending money to a cam girl, then stole from his family to keep sending her money, then he killed them when they tried to stop his contact with her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 04:28 PM
36

Those of us who have dealt with a cheater know that a discussion just ain't worth it. There is no conclusion, only wasted breath and an exhausted heart. All the talk does is allow for the cheated to attempt to manipulate the one they've hurt. The mature thing is to just silently go away and move on with your life. We create our own closure. Never rely on those who harm you to give you peace in a pretty bow.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 04:06 PM
47

Because they don't want you going around losing then their chance to manipulate their affair partners. They want them to try and communicate and come to them vulnerable and confused so they can keep their side piece. Messed up men need every ounce of vulnerability they can get to keep their ferris wheel of f***ery turning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 12:19 AM
112

I was just about to say the exact same thing. There are ALWAYS red flags that predate this stuff but the women have normalized them to the point that this may seem like a blow out but it isn't. It's a natural escalation of a bad personality.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/10/21 10:09 PM
7

It's almost like they take a course.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 06:29 PM
11

I had an ex who would put out feelers every year. Once a year he'd creep in to my Facebook messages and test the waters. Once I was married he stopped trying, got his new girlfriend pregnant, and had a baby. Dude probably has about 5 fiance's a year and couldn't keep it in his pants while we were together, but somehow hyper-romantisized what we had at one point. Some weird meant to be even through the cheating and lying and I would realize be was meant for me and I would run back to him. Nah bro…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 06:04 PM
387

A young South Asian guy I know is gay. His parents say that's fine so long as he upholds the family dignity by marrying a good Indian girl they have picked for him and provide grandkids. Then he can be gay behind the scenes. It's so twisted and so sad for all involved.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 05:01 AM
3

I never understood her attraction to Logan or Jess. I am all about Dean. He encouraged her, didn't feel threatened by her intelligence or goals, aimed to settle down and be stable. He built her a car!!! Yes, he has some growing up to do (everyone does). I hated how they destroyed his character with the whole affair aspect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/21 06:35 PM
161

I know plenty of women with crap husbands and boyfriends who are miserable but see themselves as stuck because it's expected that they have to be with someone. I also know multiple women who are single and absolutely beaming with enjoyment and life with no desire for a man. Being with someone doesn't guarantee happiness and being being single doesn't guarantee sadness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/21 06:25 PM
60

I was super fortunate that my mom was open about sex and I will do the same with my children. I never got the cutesy explaination when I was a kid. Mom discussed how consent works (sex when I'm ready, not when someone is pressuring and trying to convince) and how there are multiple types of birth control and we would go together to find the right one if and when I thought I was ready for sex. She also said double protection always, so condoms and birth control. I never had sex until after highsc…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/21 03:58 PM
189

This was part of the sex talk I received as a preteen. My mom full on had a segment built in about orgasms. "Tell guys what makes you cum, don't let them try to figure it out. If they can't make you cum, say goodbye."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/21 02:46 PM
12

Men who are secure and pulling their weight in the family don't complain about this nonsense. The women who are trying to cater to the men who do have some serious work to do with their self esteem. I always ask, "Are you happy in this dynamic? Do you feel fulfilled? So you feel loved and respected?" That usually puts an end to their chittering because they know they actually aren't.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 04:05 PM
195

The best thing to do is to look at the men he keeps around him. If he isn't calling out bullshit, he's supporting it. You have one very reasonable boundary here that he is sweeping aside. If he and his friends are so incapable of having a good time without a woman dancing nude for money, then they have some serious character flaws. And those flaws are for them to fix, no one else.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 12:28 AM
708

Exactly this. My husband refuses to go to bachelor parties because he knows there are often strippers. His friends tried to convince him to let them plan a bachelor party for him and asked what kind of girl he wanted to strip. He said their sister or mom would do. They got offended and he asked them if it was such an okay and acceptable way to treat the women, why was it bad to think of their relatives doing it? He stopped hanging out with those guys and deleted their phone numbers. His ultimate…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/21 09:58 PM
61

That's exactly what it translates to for me as well. I dated those types. They expect the woman to keep coming back to the pain. That's not loyalty, that's masochism.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/21 03:07 AM
55

My dad was big in to martial arts, so this talk resulted in 5 year old me learning to throw a punch. One of my favourite memories.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 09:28 PM
151

I heard it in like... Kindergarten. Other girls in my class were told by family and so they mentioned it to me. My dad told me that if a boy pulled my hair or hurt me at school, that I had every right to gut punch him. My mom also said that if I got sent to the principal for hitting a boy back for this behaviour that she and my dad(they were divorced at this time) would be coming down to raise hell, so not to worry, they had my back. My parents are flawed and I have issues with them both, but I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 09:11 PM
57

Creation, publishing, and distribution is illegal. First sentence is up to 5 years and a fine. Years added on sentence in the case of repeat offenders. Watching isn't illegal. He was telling me if your parents find out you're watching it you're likely to get a beating and called a disappointment. There was a rape case recently where a young woman was gang raped by her boyfriend and a bunch of guys and filmed. The video was used as blackmail for the girl. The men involved were sentenced to death.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 05:07 PM
175

Porn is illegal in my husband's home country. He thinks it should be illegal here too. As someone who grew up in a country that normalized sex work and porn, I am not going to lie about how much of a damn relief it was to find out he is anti porn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 03:45 AM
22

Exactly. There are so many every day details that get overlooked. If the wife is stay at home for example, how does that help the working husband with advancement in his career? Does the wife put together dinners to host the husband's employer? Taking over care of home and family is no small contribution. I remember in Sex and the City, Charlotte was given a prenup to sign. She was offered $500,000 in the case of divorce and she negotiated for $1,000,000. That made more sense due to cost of livi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 09:06 PM
73

How dare a woman feel nurturing love to anyone that isn't him!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 07:36 PM
14

Yup. It is a whole onion of f***ery. There is always another layer and it leads to tears.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 06:13 PM
23

Nope. They told him he was dead to them. He is unaffected. Files bankruptcy and hid all his money. Planned it all out with a long term affair partner as she waits for her husband to die of cancer so she inherits it all and they will disappear together. Forensic accountants cost beyond my aunt's or cousin's affordability, so they can't track his money. His own sisters are trying to help my aunt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 06:11 PM
26

It's such a weird situation honestly. So her children were all homeschooled their whole lives and have no social skills and are very codependent to an unhealthy level. They were taken care of for everything their whole lives and have no real world experience. They work random part time jobs and can't really help her much. One is trying, but he has no skills beyond low end part time jobs. My mother has tried to help her as she has been divorced multiple times and has experience, but my aunt liste…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 06:04 PM
45

Yeah, I feel like there will always be gaps that leave someone unprotected. My aunt lost everything after 30+ years of marriage and being a stay at home wife/mother/homeschooler. No prenup, husband cheated the whole marriage, she has no money to her name and couldn't afford a half decent lawyer. So she gets next to no alimony for a ridiculously short time and is homeless. The bare bones of a prenup should protect against such a thing... Ideally.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 05:45 PM
159

Pre-nups are a good way of protecting people. But it has to be planned with a fine tooth comb. My aunt's divorce opened my eyes to a lot of flaws in not protecting oneself. Assets that predate the marriage are not to be split in the case of divorce. Assets acquired after marriage are to be split depending on other clauses. If there is a stay at home partner, x-amount of money only they have account access to needs to be made with regularly paid installments. While stay at home spouses won't be w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 02:01 PM
149

When it says that the sex will feel good, you know it won't be good sex. Good feeling sex comes from a place of comfort and openness. And if a guy is thinking like this, it isn't feeling good to the woman. Dude is 100% selfish in the sack and just floppy fish pumps and is done. Men who need to break a woman down aren't going to be good lovers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/21 01:38 PM
67

I am married to a HVM (experienced more than enough NVM). I use FDS when discussing dating with my single friends or women coworkers. We have all had different dating experiences and all have different ideals for our lives, and are all attracted to different looks and lifestyles. However, while we have our differences, it is absolutely vital we pool our collective knowledge to help one another. This is how we embolden women, how we encourage self investment, and how we put an end to toxic relati…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 09:19 PM
82

I was also exposed to hardcore porn way too young. I was about 12 when I got in to anime which in turn led to hentai. Holy crap does that skew reality. I was also young and unsupervised on the internet back when it wasn't well known to be dangerous and in need of caution. My mom was also a single pick me mom, so I was home alone a lot while she worked and dated. I was exposed to way too many older men who took advantage of my youth and naivete. But it was normalized in my mind because they did i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 08:23 PM
35

Emily Gilmore. She was classy, held people to a higher standard, and took no crap. When I was young I glamourized Lorelai and Rory but rewatching it when older, I can only handle Emily's parts. I wish I had a mom/grandmother who aimed for my success like she did.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 05:00 PM
133

When a guy thinks women are all innocent and incapable of awful things. It tells me they don't see women as people capable of diverse personalities, whims, or individuality. They see women on the same level of children (and even then, these guys don't see children as people also capable of being individuals, good or bad)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 04:47 PM
6

I'd participate, but mine is not an option. My husband is less than a month older than me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/21 12:05 AM
207

I never wanted children with the guys I dated before. It was like their awfulness killed any maternal desires I had. Then met my husband and I wanted children with him. My NVX stated before he wanted children to carry on his legacy. I asked him what legacy? Torn up boxers and a copy of FallOut? He wasn't able to elaborate more beyond, "But mAH legacccyyy!!"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 03:52 PM
12

I have severe avoidance tendencies... Can't fail if I don't try! It has been a long battle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 04:52 PM
27

This and the shared Facebook page.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 01:51 PM
37

It's not the bank balance, it's the character summary. This what so many people fail to see. Poor career ambition means no financial stability or drive (which will be present in other areas of life) in a world of increasing costs. You want someone who is at least as ambitious as you are to venture in to life together and that requires a good job. I want those who scream gold digger to do an honest budget (and I mean honest. Don't try to budget in living with parents and living off crap food) of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 06:00 PM
18

I always say to these types to say this to the women and children forced in to sex work. Tell them how empowering it is when they were sold at 9 to a brothel so their parents could afford food for another month for their other children. Tell the women kidnapped under the guise of becoming a model and forced in to prostitution. Tell the 13 year old girls in Asian countries who are made to strip for the old perverts who visit the bar they work at. Let them know how empowered they are when pregnant…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 02:55 PM
343

I grew up in a home where I wasn't allowed to express negative emotions. If I reacted in anger, frustration, or sadness, I was quickly reprimanded for being too emotional and crazy. I am in my 30's and still trying to learn how to express myself when I'm angry because I always fear being seen as crazy and having a consequence, even though I am simply standing up for myself. It is so harmful for girls and women to be raised to be afraid of their anger.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 03:48 AM
5

Take screenshots of everything, get finances in order, file for divorce and sole custody.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 07:33 PM
2

My ring was custom made in my husband's country for less than $2000. He also got me various other jewelry. Worth about $5000 total. He also sold property to pay off my med school so I can graduate debt free.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 07:09 PM
103

It's getting cold and all sorts of creatures are seeking shelter as winter blows in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 06:20 PM
117

One thing a lot of people gloss over, in the case of terminated relationships, is that there is a lot that happened behind closed doors. I honestly don't know one person who didn't try to sort stuff out with their partner a hundred times before they just couldn't do it anymore. The nights crying in the bathroom after another argument because they refused to look for a job. The meals gone cold on the table that were made to be fresh when the spouse got home, but they neglected to say they were go…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 04:24 PM
117

I love that you kept the $5. I have two exes who try to reach out still. One tries once a year and the other harassed me and my family for a year after I kicked him out. He tried again 4.5 years after I got rid of him with some lame, "I was going through photos of family and have some of us. I thought you might like to have them, so I can start a shared drop box and send them. Let me know." I never met his family and he never spent time with mine. I also never posed for photos. He made it up ent…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 02:44 PM
72

Where is it supposed to go? The back of our knees?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 12:43 AM
323

If I see anyone in an alley, male or female, I ain't going down that alley. This guy need to be fricken removed from the general public until he makes progress with intense therapy. No normal person pulls this stunt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 12:04 AM
50

Me 18, him 23. -the wanted me to buy him brand things to show my love. I was unemployed. -wanted me to visit him but wouldn't help with the costs to travel to him. - was diagnosed with depression after army injury. Never sought treatment. -lived with mom and dad forever. -would always message me between girlfriends ready to marry me (Young me over romantisized this as being meant to be together) - was not actually attractive... But dressed well and was confident. Man, glad I didn't go through wi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 03:18 PM
19

And lifeless eyes...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 08:22 PM
40

My mother was married to a cop... the stuff I saw and how they cover up their behaviour is terrifying. I refused to date a cop or anyone in the legal profession because of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 02:59 PM
155

The one who uses the vanilla sex term concerns me. Porn has normalized abuse to a point where these guys can't even be satisfied by a healthy level of intimacy or form a meaningful, loving bond with a woman with sex. It has to be checking, slapping, insulting, etc. I am so concerned for the younger generation of women starting out on their dating journey in the age of porn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 02:39 PM
41

Odd, those are all things my husband likes about me ...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/21 04:19 AM
119

My husband is Indian, I'm white. Everyone(male acquaintances) was congratulating him on getting with a promiscuous white girl. They thought I was a fun experience for him before he married a good Indian girl his parents would choose. He no longer speaks to anyone who even suggested that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 11:50 PM
23

My aunt was married to a pilot. He took his dick international. Apparently had a few different women around the world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 05:49 PM
43

My mom was a pick me. When I was in high school and was going through crushes, I was upset when my friend made a move on the guy she knew I liked. They ended up dating and she always made a point of making out with him in front of me. My mom started planning out for me to win him. She planned outfits and watching movies with women who did that stuff. I told her she was crazy. If he went with her, that means he wasn't in to me, so why would I put in the effort? She was baffled. I just stopped han…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 05:36 PM
20

The amount of men who can't not pee on the toilet seats at work is so appalling. If you can't wield it, sit down!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 04:43 PM
25

In the past I've seen comments say that we should all kill men and so on. Then the comment is screenshot and posted in other subs to point out how crazy FDS is. Like within an hour. I also get crazy messages from supposed members and they are rude, insulting, and they have language slips like female and roasties etc. It's them trying to make the group look like it's legitimately as messed up and they are so it can get shut down. They create false evidence. If they have this kind of time, perhaps…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 03:46 PM
83

I get random messages from pick mes and men. It's also funny to see the downvotes on my posts. It's fake internet points... Like come on, grow up. Reddit points make no difference in my life and losing them doesn't wound me like they hope.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 01:40 PM
49

Exactly. Neither sound like they have gathered enough life experience as individuals to really develop a good foundation of self to build a relationship with another person on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 11:45 PM
221

Same. My husband and I have been sitting in the same office everyday since COVID broke out. We share a desk and I am a student and he works full time. We haven't fought once. Our friends in cohabitation were complaining about their fights within a month. I have never thought my marriage was hard or too much to handle. I never felt I couldn't trust him (if I had an inkling of doubt of his character, I wouldn't be in this marriage) They just sound like they are mismatched but won't take an honest …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 09:53 PM
100

I thought when men didn't want to have unwanted pregnancies their bodies had a way of shutting down?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 01:38 PM
41

I think there was a show that showed what happened to a town when all the wives left. It was as expected.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 01:37 PM
68

They say, with no shame or self reflection.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 01:22 PM
25

Dude is seriously priotizing his weird crap over his child getting fed. Where are these women finding these men?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 01:18 PM
159

While managing the cooking, cleaning, their own job, setting up family doctor appointments, signing kids up for extra curriculars, helping with homework, getting a tutor if they can't. Baking for bake sales. Helping with school fundraisers. Getting the kids instruments for band and taking them for repairs on their lunch breaks. Packing lunches. Grocery shopping/meal planning. Hosting sleepovers and birthday parties. Getting kids to specialists of need be and healing with new instructions for the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 01:08 PM
29

It would only have had a chance of being cute if the last one was him slipping on a real ring to surprise her and proposing somewhere nice. Like if he used the paper rings to size her finger up to pick the ring. So many guys like to tease marriage ... Too many women fall for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 04:36 PM
66

I knew a woman. Who mixed veggies in to spaghetti sauce for her husband to eat them. How is that not embarassing to admit?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 04:16 PM
10

Exactly. He wants a woman who is required by their society to perform "wifely duties", or be shamed. Anyone I know from a culture of arranged marriages are miserable in their unions. They women are downtrodden and demanded upon while the men are awful because regardless of their issues, they are guaranteed a wife.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 01:19 AM
12

Dude is built like a stick bug.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 01:08 AM
36

I never see these marriages work. If a guy is serious about marrying a woman, he will. It's like how so many LVM rapid fire propose to any woman they feel particular horny for. A HVM wants to get married and is clear in his intentions. He ain't waiting a decade. I was engaged after a year together. Discussions were honest from the beginning that we were dating for marriage as an end goal and not to just try people out. We both wanted to pursue actual commitment. It was honestly refreshing to not…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 05:27 PM
98

For some reason I was imaging the eggs being outfitted with tiny lasers attached that shoot down sperm. Like the Death Star... but effective. I love that something is being developed that will so all the hormone tampering women experience on BC.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 07:42 AM
43

I understand that not everyone has the same ideal type of proposal, hell, mine wasn't traditional due to cultural differences, but everyone has different situations and expectations. But my god, how so women justify such low effort, brain dead proposals as a sign of a good life mate? If he can't put in the effort for the proposal, what the heck do the expect for the marriage? I really wish they'd so making this stuff sound "cute" and "spontaneous". It's just encouraging men to not try. A man who…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 07:39 AM
63

He spelled it out with his urine on the bathroom floor because he was too drunk to aim.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 07:24 AM
16

Even my husband says this. Just the other day he said, "90% of men are dogs and need to be avoided. And I'm being generous." Men know what other men are up to and the ones who don't admit it are in on the nonsense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 08:52 PM
5

In my pick me days I was friends with benefits with a guy who legit suggested we have sex during our "break up" so we both left feeling good. I wasn't that desperate of a pick me and walked out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 07:12 PM
13

I wish I was that exciting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/21 09:50 PM
28

I ask for university courses towards my degree.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/21 09:46 PM
21

I stopped taking cabs after too many men commented on how I should be a stay at home wife and mother (I was early 20's and working hospitality, so weird hours). Buddy, if I didn't work those hours, you would have had this fare.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/21 09:21 PM
194

Men are super uneducated about birth control. It's some weird magical thing to them and they refuse to actually look in to it. They just think it's this thing that is super easy and convenient but they don't listen to women when they discuss how it effects them from depression and anxiety to weight issues and hair loss. And... Women can still get pregnant on birth control! Hormonal pill weight loss/gain: I took it religiously and got pregnant. Why? Because I lost a significant amount of weight q…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/21 06:15 PM
30

I am fine with masturbation. It's normal, it's healthy, and women do it too. My problem with porn is how it fuels the sex trafficking/tourism industry, abuses women, warps viewers sense of intimacy and destroys relationships, and how it takes advantage of the vulnerable. It doesn't take a genius detective to find the scientific journals that have explored in depth, the damages(financial, physical, mental, emotional) caused by the porn industry. Hell, ask police officers who work on sex crimes an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 06:44 PM
3

Small towns are just something else. The people there just operate differently.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 02:21 PM
59

I want more honest titles like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 11:28 PM
32

Right? I mean, I'm flattered they think so highly of my vagina and it's capabilities.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 10:32 PM
75

It was actually women who accused me. Total pick mes and their mother who were obsessed with my husband and tried to "seduce" him. He didn't go for it and told them to have self respect for how they were behaving. After that they started to accuse me of drugging him or trapping gun with my devil vagina magic. Like they really spun an interesting version of me. I am not as exciting as their stories would make me seem. They tried to slander me around town and the mom begged my husband to take one …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 10:25 PM
140

I was also accused of vaginal sorcery. When I called out how ridiculous that was, the accusation was changed to me drugging my husband to fall in love with me. Like come on, how do people not hear how crazy they are?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 09:10 PM
11

Oh yeah. The town is in the middle of nowhere, hillbilly central. Very small, largely uneducated population with a major drug/drinking problem. A fancy dinner out was at the local A&W. Think of a hillbilly drug den as a town.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 08:25 PM
40

I never got this height thing. My husband is maybe an inch taller than me. Personally I love it because no one is hurting their neck to kiss. One of the worst people I dated was 6'4". Height=/=personality. I believe they just use it as a guise. They can't change their height and they don't want to change themselves, so they default to the excuse of the thing they can't change. I've seen chubby guys, bald guys, short guys, and hairy guys in solid relationships and they were amazing partners to th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 05:20 PM
12

From my own experience and the collective stories of family and friends, not much, if any better. I am married now, but my husband isn't from Canada or the US. If I'm completely honest, given my own experiences before meeting my husband, if we were ever to not be together anymore, I wouldn't date again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 04:27 PM
77

I hail from a small redneck town in Canada. I never dated until I left my town, everyone looked so... Icky. Unwashed, sloppy hair, stained and ripped clothes. Oh! And pajama pants are totally reasonable dining attire.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 05:55 AM
111

This really brings to the surface who you are with. How a mean reacts to tragedy and injustice will give you a really good idea on how they'll treat you. This young woman is dead. How is that a joke? She was murdered. How is that funny? Her parents lost a child. Where is the humor? And these men complain when women are too guarded and don't give broken men a chance. This is why. Because women can be murdered and a few weeks later be a joke.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 05:50 AM
5

My sentence with a bum was 4 years and it cost me about $45,000 in the end. I could have put a down payment on a house and completed my bachelor's with that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 11:51 PM
144

I imagine that after about a year, if marriage hasn't been discussed in depth with a hard deadline from both parties, it's time to move along. A lot of guys these days are so afraid of even having a discussion about getting married or planning a life together that it's irritating. They don't seem to understand that the woman they have begging to get married is likely the only one even willing to put up with their nonsense long term. But they convince themselves there are options for them, so the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 08:16 PM
3

This is why I am a huge advocate for body cams on all cops during the entirety of their shifts. One of my mom's husbands was a cop. They cover stuff up for eachother like crazy. Imagine if we didn't have the footage of Gabbie during the police stop. Just the cops word.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 02:59 AM
15

My mom got me out of the house. My ex was a coward when anyone else was around, so he never said no when she would randomly pick my up to take me out. She never bad mouthed him, she never lectured me, she just got me out of the house and doing things I enjoyed. She moved me close to her when I lost my job so she could keep an eye on me. She signed me up for a paint night, took me hiking, signed me up for fitness classes. Once I got some air, my head cleared, I regained confidence, I just... I fe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 06:35 PM
18

My ex always carried a knife in his pocket. He was so unstable and unpredictable that I didn't know when he would just stab me. When I finally did decide to kick him out, I had to leave to a place where he couldn't get me and then I called his dad to come pick him up. His own father told me not to go near him because I would be at risk of being hurt or killed. He said that he himself would call me once he was able to pick my ex up and that if there was any damage done to my apartment, he'd come …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 05:11 PM
56

I never understood this whole "Got to try everything!" mentality. We're people, not Costco samples...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 10:17 PM
79

That I don't have to be the always polite and docile woman. I am allowed to tell people to f*** off and not feel bad about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 07:42 PM
81

Same here. I used to think that sex work was fine if the women engaging in it were willing participants and felt empowered by it. But this sub helped me realize just how much of a myth that is. I knew human trafficking was wrong and was against it of course, but with all today's media and liberal feminism, I thought there were two seperate types of sex work, forced and willing. Now I am against porn completely and have learned more about how those who work in the porn industry typically have a h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 07:42 PM
48

My single mom friends with dead beat exes/dad's say they could even work around child support issues if the guys even bothered to interact with the kids. It's one thing if they are trying to get on their feet and can't do a lot financially for awhile, but they completely abandon the kids. Instead the guys are living it up with all the money they supposedly don't have and the mom's have to pick up the pieces of broken hearted children. At 5 one friend's son asked why his daddy didn't love him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 04:41 PM
10

My aunt forgave her husband the first time (that she found out) he cheated in the 90's. He never changed and it turns out he has been cheating the whole 34 years married and now she's broke, homeless, and uneducated while he and an affair partner are living it up. Cheaters don't care about the person they harm, not 5 years in and not 30 years in. Dude ain't worth another minute.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 11:48 PM
35

Same. The concept doesn't bother me because I think men need to stop disparaging men for being family focused (too many guys tear other guys down for doing "women's" roles). But the actual execution is where the problem lies. I know some women who are absolutely career focused and wouldn't be able to stand being a stay at home mother, but would love their child to have a stay at home parent and to come home to a good meal and clean home. But finding the guy who would fulfill this role is the har…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 05:12 PM
11

I honestly gave up the idea of having children until I met my husband. From what I witnessed around me when it came to men and families, I just wanted nothing to do with it( So much child abandonment and neglect). There really does need to be an extensive conversation dedicated solely to the structure of the family and children before you progress too far in to dating. Excuse me, I enjoy lists and planning... -Home many children? -Birthing plan -Family health history and how to combat issues -If…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 04:59 PM
45

Dearest madam or sir, If thoust wishes thy son not be called a scrote, then thoust best not raise a scrote. Sincerely, Got better things to do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 10:59 PM
197

At 13 I was still terrified of the idea of even holding a boys hand. Same with my friends. Who the hell thinks the average 13 year old is having an old fashion Greek history style orgy? Dude is a creep and needs to be kept away from kids.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 04:50 PM
44

They always, always try to hold on to things they think their victim will want or need just so they have an excuse to reach out. My ex tried this recently and fabricated some photos that never existed. I kicked his ass out almost 6 years ago and he still tried. I hope OP can find a different building to live in for her own peace.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 01:53 PM
95

100% guilty. Best case scenario he abandoned her alive in the woods somewhere and she could still be alive. Worst case scenario, he killed her and ditched her body aomewhere. We ladies have watched enough true crime to probably figure it out though. If someone I was travelling with was missing for even a few hours I would be notifying police, calling family, getting park rangers, and not leaving the damn area.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 01:44 PM
90

Here's the thing, when I was living with my abusive and controlling ex, I swear I was going insane. I became the absolute worst version of myself around him. People don't understand how much a bad relationship can mess with a person. Even if she irritated him, you then the van around, get home, and end the relationship. You don't kill someone. Too many guys are justifying possible homicide and that's terrifying.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 01:40 PM
49

I honestly just ignore them and it bugs them so much. I won't reply once. Not giving them the entertainment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/21 11:02 PM
220

Ugh, my aunt's soon to be ex husband said something similar. She asked why he bothered to get married if he was going to cheat for the entire 34 years marriage. "Because you were good breeding stock." Gag...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/21 06:25 PM
8

I get the flashbacks too. I let myself work through them. I remember who I was as a person back then and why I allowed that in my life and remember all the ways I have improved my life and myself since then. So if I have one bad flashback, I make myself think of as many positive ones I created on my own to replace it. Bad things happened, but they didn't define me. So I remind myself of that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/21 01:46 PM
42

I came here for a few reasons I guess. My mom was a pick me and this group really helped me figure out just how messed up my childhood was by learning more about her issues. And it's great to discuss women's issues with women! Not have it joked around about or "solved" by men. I love hearing how other women are sick of the nonsense and are calling it out. It is getting harder out here to find women to talk to who share the same ideals(ban porn,videogame addiction, encouraging education) and valu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 11:19 PM
19

It is so important that even after a woman becomes a wife and or a mother that she continues to forge an identity outside of the home and family. After all, before you were a wife and mother, you were a woman, a whole and complete person. Never even let that person fade away, keep giving yourself purpose and taking on challenges that help you grow.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 10:57 PM
3

I made it to the second statement before I had to close it. I just... This is so damn vile...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 06:12 PM
19

Right? And I hate that this scumbag convinced her otherwise. He wanted to feel like the victim and he thought this was going to work because she would be seen as bad for snooping and he could distract from why she felt she had to snoop. I'm so tired of people getting told they shouldn't have snooped even though they got confirmation of what they were fearing. "Oh you found out your boyfriend was a serial killer because you went through his cell phone? You really should have respected he boundari…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 03:24 PM
75

Yup. My husband is very supportive of me completing my education and having my own hobbies. He covers all living expenses while I focus on school. My part time job is for my savings and paying for my bachelors so that I don't have to enter med school with debt. We even divide the chores and cooking because small tasks can take up too much time from bigger goals, so no one person should be responsible. Hell, when I want to go shopping or out to lunch with my friends or family, he hands me his cre…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 08:01 PM
19

A man whose sense of strength is dependent on the weakness of a woman is not a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 06:59 PM
163

Agreed. My aunt was married almost 35 ish years and her soon to be ex cheated the whole time. She was a stay at home mother with no education beyond highschool. He and his affair partner made plans to screw over their spouses and now my aunt is close to retirement age with no money, no education, no friends, and no savings. She was also kicked out of her home because he even planned for how to do that. Always get educated, save, keep yourself active in your field(even part time, just keep your n…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 06:55 PM
21

I make myself a fancy charcuterie board and get my favorite wine. Once that's all prepared I have a glorious bubble bath with candles, soft music, and put on a face mask while I soak. Once that's done I retire to the bed with the charcuterie board and wine and watch horror movies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 06:44 PM
47

I... I just can't. That list is all completely resovable by having fricken conversations. And if you can't come to a comfortable agreement for both partners, then that person ain't for you. If you can't talk to your potential partner about finances, tidiness habits, or sex, then you're in the wrong relationship or need to mature more before pursuing one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 03:55 AM
26

Same here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 01:32 AM
9

When I was making repeatedly bad choices in dating, I took time off from dating. One time I took 3 years away from it and I explored more of my interests and just listened to myself more. It helped me to validate my own intuition. For example: I used to think I was a prude for not wanting to make out in public, but then I realized that's a totally healthy boundary to have. But a lot of guys tried to convince me of it before and even though I had that gut feeling that I was being disrespected, I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 12:21 AM
20

My mom is a huuuge pick me and it caused me a lot of damage. Like, a lot. My father is a narcissist with a god complex and he mentally/verbally/emotionally abused me. So that was a fun combo to grow up with. My mother had so many guys coming and going and so much drama that I had no idea what a healthy relationship looked like. So I made mistakes with men later on. But I remember her falling apart each and every time as she kept I touch with them and how her mind was breaking. I didn't want that…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/21 09:16 PM
46

I've been blocking and deleting since I was a teenager. My family and friends always wondered why I never maintained friendships with guys who were a part of my life. Um, because speaking to them causes me to be hurt. I don't like to be hurt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/21 08:32 PM
6

Child beauty pageants need to be banned imho. Adult beauty pageants give me the creeps and set a weird precedent that woman are on display to be judged at all times. I've heard too much about mental health issues and eating disorders being spurred by pageants that I can't support them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/21 08:30 PM
8

This is not normal and it is not healthy. It is flat out abuse and people are trying to normalize it and gaslight women in to accepting it. A deer doesn't try to talk it out with a wolf that took a bite out of its ass. No one should be sitting down for a conversation with their abuser.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/21 08:23 PM
9

The comments are... concerning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/21 05:24 PM
14

Once I stopped speaking to this type of friend, I suddenly had no friends. And I'm okay with that. It's much more peaceful in my world as I am not internalizing anyone else's drama. Now I have a lot of time to dedicate to my own pursuits and I feel whole without having a massive friend list.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/21 05:22 PM
12

Okay, so my mother was a pick me and she was neglectful due to it. She always had some guy who would turn out to be a complete stain on society. I met about 20 guys and we lived with about 6 of them (always got kicked out randomly because it was always the guy's house) I dated 5 guys, slept with even less than that, and got engaged to a HVM who is absolutely amazing and supportive of me and my goals. I was getting more and ore confident in my life and he came along and I became more established …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/21 12:24 AM
5

If he can't adult, he sure as hell can't partner.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 07:49 PM
11

My aunt it going through an awful divorce and she is being royally screwed over. Like, it's unfathomably bad. She will soon be homeless and hasn't worked in almost 35 years(stay at home mom/wife, no education) My husband and I are in the middle of house hunting. As soon as he heard he told me to look for space with an extra room/bathroom so she can live with us. He has never even met her, but says we will take her in and help her get established. Even cover getting her training in a certificate …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 07:37 PM
13

He used to be cute, but like damn, take away the money and he is a basement dwelling looking guy, right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 05:22 PM
112

I was the child with a pick me mom who dated about 15 men I was introduced to and we moved in with 7 of them. Should I ever end up a single mother, I wouldn't actively date. If something happened, then fine, but it would be a year before I even introduce my child to a potential partner. Then about 2-3 years before I lived with them and even then, I would keep finances 100% seperate forever. As a child, I had to pack up randomly without notice and live somewhere else too many times. The creeps an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 07:48 PM
27

That's a good point... I stopped shaving mine bald once I got more comfortable in who I am as a person and a woman. My husband literally has never had a problem or even made a comment about my pubic hair. He's secure in himself and us as a couple... This... is making me think.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 05:58 PM
48

Porn... it's not just pubic hair. Guys are harrassing women about having a vulva that isn't the typical type seen in porn and women are getting labiaplasties to have their labias shortened. It's twisted...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 05:51 PM
24

1) I'm in a developed country, women can work, drive, and have surface equality to men. 2)Subtle sexism. I'm in customer service while j earn my degree. A lot of people treat me like crap because I have a sweeter voice, so they think that means I'm an easy target for their tantrum. I can tell them the right answer, but they don't believe it until they hear a man's voice. Their behaviour is always calmed down when they speak to a man. 3) Abortion is legal and mostly accessible. If you live in rur…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 03:08 PM
28

Anytime I see that only black and white colour scheme in a guys house, the only colour I see as an accent is that awful candy red. I hate it. It's such an aggressive red.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 02:47 PM
60

I just watched a YouTube video about this one. The original sentence was going to be like 8 years because cannibalism isn't illegal there and the guy consented to being eaten (actively sought it out). But they thankfully determined a person who seeks that out isn't mentally well enough to make a decision, so he got a life sentence. Dude even had kids. I feel so bad for them to ever know how their father died.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 02:43 PM
9

Focus on studies and to avoid online chat rooms. Get your health in order. And learn how to invest your babysitting money lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 08:50 PM
44

One thing I just can't with these people is that there are so many documentaries out where they speak to the women and children of the sex industry from poor countries and these idiots still try to argue it isn't harmful. Women in developed countries have come forward about how messed up their lives are or how their mental health is spiralling while dealing with what they went through. But who cares so long as they get tingles in their mergers eh?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 08:38 PM
20

This is where I use the shit sandwich analogy. Imagine your favorite sandwich. You're really hungry, it's got all the fixings, but there's a catch. There is a tiny bit of shit in the sandwich. You don't know where, but it's in there. Are you still going to eat the sandwich?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 01:42 PM
56

See, the guys I've dated who were awful to me were the typical Redditor personality. I'm in a happy, healthy, and solid relationship with a man. He is the complete opposite of the guys the average Redditor says to date.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/21 02:44 AM
15

The condition of their boxers and how many they have. Bonus points if a guy has a bidet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/21 01:38 AM
16

Based on years of experience trying to help friends on crap relationships, I don't. I don't have the time to devote to fixing other people's problems. It just feels like I'm in another bad relationship by proxy. I got shit to do in my life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/21 01:36 AM
3

Lol never got that far. He was violently psychotic and emotionally delicate and always carried a pocket knife. I said yes to not set him off, but plotted and planned and was able to kick him out a few months later.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/21 12:41 AM
144

I think the men who would make a woman need to use the fuck off fund are the ones who are most afraid of it. HVM know they aren't going to be pulling nonsense, so it doesn't cause contention. Good on your dad for encouraging you on it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 10:40 PM
13

Love this song!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 07:20 PM
81

Maybe I watch too much true crime ... but this reads like someone who would have someone locked in their basement.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 04:53 PM
36

I mean, I work in customer service right now... I wouldn't mind swinging a few punches around... But I do this little thing call self control. Ever watch the Croods 2? I'm picking up real punch monkey vibes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 02:59 PM
40

Right? Mine is about $3,000 and was custom made. I wonder if this guy has a gaming system at home and how much that cost.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 02:52 PM
93

Why do men just punch everything?it is absolutely insane that they think it is just part of everyday conversation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 02:45 PM
13

Now I know why he always creeped me out...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 02:32 PM
52

First time I was proposed to was with a $25 ring from Amazon he put on my credit card.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 10:20 PM
17

I did the emotional labour once as a low self esteem pick me. He had ADHD and bipolar. Refused treatment. What did it cost me? $40,000 covering all his share of the bills(could have been a bachelor's degree) $3,000 debt My credit rating and money going to collections Stress fueled eating and weight gain My job because I was so stressed I could no longer perform. What did he get? Free food Free housing Got to play video games all day every day because he couldn't keep a job! Just nope.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 07:01 PM
71

I can't imagine even hesitating about telling my sister and we aren't even close. I'd be sending screen shots so fast and calling her right away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 06:48 PM
20

Okay, so it wasn't just me getting an influx of these in YouTube shorts? There was this one where the daughter was one year you her than the dad's wife. The daughter looked so damn uncomfortable as the dad and child-stepmom danced like fools showing it off. It was so cringe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 04:39 PM
223

That is such a terrible idea...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 04:37 PM
9

Okay, so my husband proposed without a ring. There were a ton of comments. Thing is, the reason he didn't was we had to navigate a complicated cultural difference. Everything worked out and my life is going in a wonderful direction. I come from a very detached family and my mother is indifferent to my existence, but his family accepted me full blast right out of the gate. My SIL and MIL and I looked at all different types of rings and designed my ring together. It means the absolute world to me …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 04:32 PM
4

He also says to her "Choose me, or the fire!" Total incel logic there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 03:34 PM
8

Lol, that's okay. It's the risk we take exposing the creeps.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 03:33 PM
29

I had to google him as I had no idea who he was. He also has domestic violence charges against him from his wife apparently...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 05:53 AM
65

It helps me get new ideas for us to try together. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 11:27 PM
160

He could have just used two. AVOID ME
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 11:16 PM
17

I enjoy some anime as a guilty pleasure, but I'm a realist as to what a majority of the genre has become. I enjoy horror anime shows, office romance, or slice of life... But it breeds some twisted stuff.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 10:56 PM
160

The most porn consumption I saw at the hotel was men 60+. They would rent multiple porn flicks and then demand refunds because they finished in less than 5 minutes(we can see how long the movie was watched) so they would say their was a glitch in the movie. No honey, you're the glitch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 08:14 PM
81

Anime and manga are major culprits of this. Oh but sensei is so hot and he's a young teacher! Um, you're 15 and the youngest he could be to become a teacher is 22. But they always make it "okay" because they get married and have a family together. I also always had a problem with Celine Dion and her husband's gap. He wasn't her teacher, but her agent... but similar dynamic of shaping a young person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 07:57 PM
249

Do you remember the Disney movie The Hunchback of Notre Dame? How Frolo, the super upright head of the church and decider of all purity was super horny for Esmerelda and was obsessive to the point of trying to burn her alive for tempting/rejecting him? It's a good representation that those who try too hard to portray good religious fibre tend to fall to their loins for a hottie.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 06:53 PM
379

One thing I learned working in hotels, way too many sweet looking grandpa types use prostitutes and watch so much porn. Front desk staff can see which movies a room rents and when we try to help connect devices to the internet, so many old guys have multiple porn tabs open.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 05:00 PM
320

That made my skin crawl. No concern that these women just randomly go missing in a dangerous profession, but "too bad I can't get sexual gratification from her again." Just eeewww.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 04:58 PM
22

I watch a lot of true crime and tend to look in to serial killers quite a bit.. One major thing I've noticed is that the female serial killers or murderers tend to have been raped and abused in their developmental years and their victims match their abusers. They are usually described as happy and bright as a child. Male serial killers have neglectful parents, but the same level of severe abuse is much rarer. They also tend to attack women who they think won't give them sex willingly or look lik…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 03:26 PM
25

I had a long term guy friend who would always disappear once he had a girlfriend. Then I'd be there to help with the breakup... then he'd disappear again once the next one came along. He always went for the super crazy ones too... like he wasn't even able to speak to female relatives type of girls. I just stopped messaging him and yeah, don't speak to him at all anymore. Got really tired of the one sided effort.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 03:03 PM
4

Back when I was in the dating game, I was surprised how many guys were trying to date while being unemployed. They were so confident in themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 05:47 PM
133

Literally never understood this fandom stuff. Do I find someone attractive? Yeah, sure... but my no means am I obsessing. I have shit to do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 04:34 PM
41

After years of bad choices in men, I stopped looking entirely. For all I cared, men were ken dolls down there. They just floated around in society as sexless entities. I started taking a bootcamp course to get fit, enrolled in courses, worked, and explored my hobbies. In my pursuit of improving my life for me, I made a friend who had similar interests in hobbies. We challenged eachother, had fun with no sexual pressure or expectations for a relationship. Now we are getting married. The biggest l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 04:32 PM
115

I personally don't understand having kids outside of being married. If the guy is worth having a kid with, he will be serious about commitment for the relationship. I know far too many single moms who got pregnant with a guy who wasn't serious about them progressing as a unit. They are tens of thousands behind on child support, don't visit the children(causing emotional harm), and the mother is screwed for her life projection. If he won't take himself seriously as a partner, he won't take being …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 03:05 AM
30

It is disturbing how stalking and harrassment has been confused for legitimate seduction methods these days.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:54 PM
7

Oh for sure. This guy has a whole series of these skits for inequality in women's clothing and hygiene products and they are hilarious(in a sad reality, but well executed way). Guys see it, but so few call it out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:26 PM
86

I never understood why so many guys want open relationships. What? You want to disappoint multiple women at once?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 01:50 PM
13

Right? I was spending like $60 for a trim and even then they would manage to cut off like a foot. My husband and I learned to do each others hair over the pandemic and ordered the stuff from Amazon. Never going back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 01:43 PM
82

And there was no point where he sounded good.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:28 AM
212

I don't expect the men who hog the Doritos to be generous with safety equipment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/21 02:41 AM
26

My friend and I live in different cities, but we send gifts and care packages to each other. Are they going through a rough week? Send a deluxe bath kit with their favourite treats!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 11:40 PM
154

During my pick me days I allowed myself in to a FWB situation. When I was done with it, I texted the guy that I couldn't do that anymore because I wanted a real relationship. "Sorry, I don't want a relationship." He says "I'm not asking for one from you." He stopped texting me... Lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 08:13 PM
3

Yes, I ended up getting one. My cat and I fight over whose turn it is to use it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 04:41 PM
30

I tried to explain to him that my blood wasn't going to be diseased if I wasn't. But nope, menstrual blood contained dormant STDs and other diseases. He always liked to boast how he was older and knew more than I did. Even when it came to my own body and it's functions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 12:33 AM
209

Okay, so I want to contrast a NVM ex of mine and my HVM husband for #2. Ex would not let me sleep in the bed during my period because blood= disease and he didn't want to catch anything. He was 6 years older than I was (I was 18) but boy was he not wiser. Husband. When we were dating he would take my heating pad and reheat it for me as soon as it got cold so I would have it to ease my cramps. In the middle of the night when it got cold and I didn't want to go to the kitchen, he legit heated it u…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/21 07:45 PM
101

Bet he wouldn't be so supportive of sex work if it was his girlfriend, sister, or mother working in such an empowering field.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 08:06 PM
11

I completely cut my father out of my life. Best decision I ever made honestly. It took years and constant struggle to remove his criticism from my mind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 03:25 PM
172

Said that to a guy once. His response? " I'd have to sleep with someone I'm not attracted to." Um... You think these women are attracted to everyone they sleep with ?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 03:00 PM
5

I enjoy video games. The amount of quizzing I got was insane.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 09:13 PM
6

I had a ton of old guys asking me if I was dtf. Had to google what that meant because I don't use chat speak. Literally 20 pages of messages asking me to bang or just "hey". Even one woman messaged me her husband's tiny 🍆 to see if I would do him while she watched.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 08:18 PM
74

Bet you he complained anytime his ex spent money on home decor.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 08:23 PM
4

🤢 just no. This just reads like an abuse victim with a gun to their head.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 05:31 PM
152

Remember when everyone lost their minds about Keanu Reeves dating a woman age appropriate? She's like 48, established, and has grey hair... And they were all spewing abuse because she wasn't some 20 year old. I'm grossed out that guys like Leo are idolized for predatory behaviour.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 05:28 PM
255

Don't tolerate behavior in a spouse you wouldn't tolerate in a child. The day I got my apartment back after kicking out my LVM ex was the absolute best.After I deep cleaned his stench out, I ordered all the food I couldn't have because he didn't like it, watched the movies I wanted...and my goddess I can not ever describe that high because it was other worldly. I want these women to get that high.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 06:16 AM
39

I was 13 when my sister said, "If older guys flirt with you, don't get flattered or think you're mature. Ask what the hell is so wrong with them women their age won't touch them and they have to creep on young girls." It really stuck with me. Thank you big sis!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 01:58 AM
25

When I sent it to my husband with Google location sharing, he got an email notification to accept. Once he did, I got a notification that he accepted to share our location. When I had an apple, and I sent the invite to share location, I didn't get notifications that he had accepted. So it sounds like this guy sent the invite to himself from her phone through means that didn't notify her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 05:52 PM
32

Yup, you can do it through Google and iPhone. My husband and I use the Google one and you just type in someone's email to invite them to share their location. You can see how much charge their battery has, where they are, and how long they've been there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 01:44 PM
140

My HVM husband and I met as co-workers, then became friends due to similar interests, then romantically involved. I think that is what helped me get in to dating again. There was no pressure of a relationship or expectations and no casual sex. Things just blossomed naturally. He wasn't pushing me for anything and was so genuine as a person in all of our interactions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 12:25 AM
36

Hell, I ask my co-workers when I'm running to the corner store if they want anything and they do the same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/21 10:40 PM
298

You mean you aren't totally turned on by a grown ass man behaving like a child and pouting in the corner like a scorned toddler? And these types are the first to wonder why their wives stop wanting intimacy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/21 06:17 PM
61

"Become young wives" ummmm no... children are being ripped away from their families to be raped and brutalized by whichever older man she's assigned to/kidnapped by. These people need to watch a damn documentary where they speak to the girls from these countries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 04:44 PM
27

My grandmother's advice was never go anywhere like a weekend get away or secluded spot together like hiking or camping until at least 6 months. She said that 6 months is usually when cracks start to appear through the fake act.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 03:05 PM
5

I honestly believe the doctors who work on people who go to this extreme should be reconsidered for whether or not be holding a license. This is clearly aiding in self harm.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 09:19 PM
41

They share the same ideologies, but hate to be compared. Bunch of loons.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 09:17 PM
6

I no longer have friends. I focus 100% on my schooling and my life with my husband and inlaws. I don't have the energy to even want to make friends now because it always involves really unnecessary drama regarding men. I just can't spend time with people who set themselves up for bullshit with weak men. I enjoy my own company. I can go to the spa alone or shopping trips alone, or even with my husband... and I love it. FDS has been amazing to me because I spent so much time healing and working on…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 09:07 PM
6

Yup. "We've treated women like shit since the beginning of time! Why don't they just cater to us and trust us 100% in spite of this???"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 09:01 PM
96

Knew a girl who picked up some random girl in the bar with her boyfriend for a threesome. They got herpes. Their relationship didn't last. Shocker....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 06:23 PM
23

Women and children are being brutalized in Afghanistan...and these fools are over here saying the Plymouth shooter is a victim because no one would sleep with him. They have no sense of where to put their energy and rage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 05:46 PM
268

My husband's friends wanted to go to one for a bachelor's party. He asked the how they would feel about strangers getting lap dances from their mothers or sisters and then told them to get out of here with their horny nonsense. He no longer speaks to these friends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 01:55 PM
60

How else can they use your weaknesses against you if you don't expose everything right away? They are in a hurry to get through the labour of getting to know someone and want to get to the good stuff already. The right people actually spend time getting to know you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 01:46 PM
93

Literally what my aunt is going through now. 30 years of marriage and three children later, she finds out he has been cheating the whole time. She only has a highschool education, no job experience, and he forbade her from making friends and tried to distance her from family. I am fine with stay at home moms, but there needs to be a bank account only they have access to that is set up for regular deposits to reflect a certain wage. My aunt is in her fifties, no job experience, no access to the a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 04:57 PM
28

Remember how back in the day women could be institutionalized and lobotamized for keeping "bad company" or "imaginary female trouble"??? Yeah...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 04:34 PM
127

I delved too curiously and too deep. You know what I discovered in the darkness of incels... depravity and sickness. Seriously though, a lot of them also boast cultures with arranged marriages and forcing women and children to be used for their depravity. I saw more than once "If she's old enough to bleed, she's old enough to breed" Just... The FBI needs to start tracking down these IP addresses.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 05:11 AM
288

I have looked through their discussions before and they have suggestions that the government should issue them women or that taken women should have to have anal with incels (the vagina is respectfully owned by the man she is with) as some weird service. It.is.messed.up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 12:54 AM
87

Once you do come forward with evidence, they then ask why you didn't come forward before it escalated to injury. It's absolute idiocy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 12:41 AM
36

Her brother was also found guilty of predatory sexual assault and child endangerment. She provided the funds for his court battles and just supports him on general. She's absolutely awful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 07:30 PM
16

I had managed to forget the butthole gummies until this comment...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 03:59 PM
9

I cut contact with him when I was 12. I had a letter delivered to him by a police officer stating I wanted nothing to do with him anymore and listed every reason why. I even told the judge if they made me go to his house anymore I would go on a hunger strike. I was so excited once I was 12 and the courts would take my opinion about custody and visitation in to consideration. He is alone. His long term gf left him (she was a gf for 11 years). Then he married a woman about 20 years younger from a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 02:27 PM
101

I kicked out an abusive deadbeat with a smorgasbord of mental health problems. When we were speaking after I kicked him out, I asked him why he never worked on bettering himself or getting treatment.... he said... "I never thought you'd actually leave." Bam! Blocked, changed my contact details, and didn't date for over a year while I worked on myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 08:56 PM
20

I went by my mom's last name growing up and right as I was about to legally change it, I got engaged lol. Mom gets the credit 100%
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 07:17 PM
57

My father complained about paying $200/month out of his $7,000 monthly take home pay... and that was a slow month for his business. He justified it as my mom was using the money for her own lavish spending and not for me. He had a boat, owned his house, had his own business, multiple vehicles, and had vacations. He hid is money under his long term girlfriend's name. Meanwhile my mother was working multiple part time jobs and trying to find creative ways to make off brand KD stretch to multiple m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 03:19 PM
92

Ugh, he keeps them like trophies. Like a damn serial killer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 02:48 PM
30

Or like badgers who regularly air out their bedding to kill off bugs and replace it a few times through the year. Too many guys have worse cleanliness habits than wild animals.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 09:07 PM
10

My husband had some super horny idiot LVM friends for awhile..they were getting so mad that whenever they went out partying, the girls would avoid them and their drunken dry humping and go with my husband. He was literally just speaking to them like people. He was asking about school, work, goals, hobbies, how they're families were etc. He told his friends the girls weren't there to hook up with tiny dicked morons, but to socialize and have fun. They never quite got it and he stopped hanging out…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 02:31 PM
206

I hate how women who are busy with school and a job are called scatterbrained or messy because they aren't prioritizing the house like guys think they should. Yet if a guy is busy with just a job and neglects chores to play video games, he's overworked, exhausted, and deserves to relax. The obvious solution? Make sure she's okay, see about arranging a meal service(there are so many now), and pay to get your house cleaned once a week. She's got an insane schedule and is clearly exhausted enough t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 03:47 PM
5

I kicked him out after he was unemployed for 2.5 years on my dime. He would throw shit, threaten me, destroy the apartment, etc. It took me a long time due to fear of my life. He always carried a knife to boot...so moody man child+knife had me terrified. Then one day I was so done, so utterly done. I went somewhere safe with my cat for a few days and I called his dad and older brothers to come get him and fake cancelled the lease so he would panic. I stayed away for a week until they could come …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 04:38 AM
5

What kind of standard does he holds the men in his life to? Does he say nothing when his friends are awful partners or does he call them out? Does he continue to keep them as company?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 06:23 PM
59

I think the idiot's lawyer will also be in trouble for encouraging a frivulous lawsuit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 06:40 AM
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