FashionableLabcoat Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	Lack of Curiosity		FashionableLabcoat	/r/Divorce_Men	13/04/26 02:03 PM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
2	To everyone going through it right now, there IS light at the end of the tunnel. I promise “Surly passenger princess” are the words I needed to hear nine months out. I need to learn how to let different types of people into my life.	/r/Divorce_Men	16/06/26 02:31 AM
1	Lack of Curiosity My bad. I just edited the post to include the link.	/r/Divorce_Men	13/04/26 06:21 PM
6	What were the signs you wished you paid more attention to? Wow. Definitely all six for her and probably all four for me. There was always a reason she “needed” the phone in bed years after I presented her with alternatives for both of us. I told her how a small device with a camera and internet access falling out from our sheets every morning concerned me about our basic privacy. There was always some reason she couldn’t just use an old iPod or Bluetooth headphones for an audiobook. After I basically begged her to stop bringing the phone to bed, she sta…	/r/Divorce_Men	24/03/26 02:00 AM
1	Are Boys Encouraged Less in STEM Today? Yep. It’s all about money. This brand of feminism is about shattering “the glass ceiling”— not scientific excellence or real engagement.	/r/MensRights	10/03/26 12:26 AM
1	Are Boys Encouraged Less in STEM Today? Amen. Decorporatize education.	/r/MensRights	10/03/26 12:22 AM
2	As the father of a newborn, it feels like the healthcare system treats me like I’m a criminal just for being a man. Don’t take the abuse screening part too personally— most clinics are required to do this in pregnancy checkups for a pretty good reason.	/r/MensRights	10/03/26 12:21 AM
5	The Math and Data of the Court They are improving. My ex was the breadwinner for eight years (she advised me to quit my job and be a house husband right before the pandemic) and is very lucky I asked the court to waive some of what she was going to be paying me. She’s now sharing social media posts about men manipulating the court system via “DARVO,” which is the psychobabble version of actual victim blaming. Oh well. I know the truth.	/r/MensRights	10/03/26 12:05 AM
1	It didn't take too long for a Journo to overtly revert back to the "Women Always Have It Worse" talking point Good point on the loan. The lies I tell myself to cope…	/r/MensRights	09/03/26 11:50 PM
1	Is higher suicide rate a sign of male privilege? Point taken! Glad that worked out for you. I only have seven years under my belt so far, so I can certainly be speaking from recency bias. Thank you!	/r/MensRights	27/02/26 04:12 AM
1	Is higher suicide rate a sign of male privilege? People see it— they just don’t step up for men. I know this because of transitioning female-to-male. It was absolutely brutal when I lost the societal safety net of being female. When I sobbed with an anxiety attack as a woman in a department store, someone people took me aside and helped me calm down before letting me continue my day. When I had the same type of anxiety attack in that department store as a man years later, police were called to drive me home. My behavior was unchanged. Repeated…	/r/MensRights	27/02/26 03:54 AM
1	Is higher suicide rate a sign of male privilege? I’ve been suicidal as both a man and woman (transitioned to male from female a few years ago) and I can tell you that people reached out to me when I showed signs of suicidality only when I was female. That first time experiencing suicidality while male was the closest I’ve ever been to “the edge”…and right in the open too. Now if I see a homeless dude on the street, I do my best to say hello to him because I’m sure they battle with that edge with no one stepping in to treat them like a human be…	/r/MensRights	27/02/26 03:44 AM
1	They still don’t get it, still blaming some bogeymen for the rightward political shift of young men I transitioned from female-to-male in 2020 and nearly killed myself because of the garbage I dealt with from “my” people when I was at my most vulnerable. I’m a living example of the origins for this bogeyman— men are being treated with no respect. I didn’t pull away— I was pushed. And the woman I was participated in this pushing. Never again. Keep speaking up.	/r/MensRights	27/02/26 03:21 AM
1	Can someone explain to me why the British mainstream media is SO obsessed with demonizing boys? Because a competently-made PSA aired on Netflix and scared a bunch of parents	/r/MensRights	27/02/26 03:15 AM
1	It didn't take too long for a Journo to overtly revert back to the "Women Always Have It Worse" talking point And would you rather have student loans or be homeless without even a lottery ticket for the lower-wage white collar work that a degree still is? Because the latter is what a lot of men who don’t get a degree have to stress about. I’m sure they would trade spots paying off loans while working your jobs in a heartbeat	/r/MensRights	27/02/26 03:11 AM
1	It didn't take too long for a Journo to overtly revert back to the "Women Always Have It Worse" talking point But the MENTAL LOAD!	/r/MensRights	27/02/26 03:07 AM
1	So are all divorced men narcissists? My wife’s therapist was a disaster— frequently trying to offer me advice through my wife’s appointments, regularly canceling on my wife last minute, sharing their own recent “success” of a divorce, and then suggesting divorce to my wife in the first place on their first therapy session together after months of time attending to their own alimony saga or whatever else they had to deal with as a public supporter of “ethical nonmonogamy.” Of course this was all part of a center advertised to LGBT a…	/r/Divorce_Men	04/02/26 03:55 AM
2	So are all divorced men narcissists? There are a lot of under-qualified ones out there right now. Beware any that advertise helping with trendy topics	/r/Divorce_Men	04/02/26 03:48 AM
1	Should I file? YES! Good GOD maybe a decision that affects more than one person should involve intensive discussion and negotiation by BOTH parties before anybody dictates what happens next. At least get on each others’ level before you start the proper fight. And actually FIGHT for gods’ sake— rising to each others’ challenges is how long-term relationships endure. Your wife isn’t a girlfriend. She is your spouse and that means something even when you’re in the process of leaving.	/r/Divorce_Men	07/01/26 05:21 AM
1	Should I file? Is your marriage about love or who gets more gold stars for task management? I see a lot of advice telling you to prioritize yourself instead of encouraging you to reflect on why she might be accusing you of not helping her. Take some time to clear your head and then think about the things you fell in love with her over. Are those still there? And yes— I’m the spouse that’s being left by someone who put me down for ADHD and needing help from her— hence the anger probably emanating from me here i…	/r/Divorce_Men	07/01/26 05:10 AM
1	Should I file? YEP. The time for both of you to really start listening to each other is here. Put down your calculators and start from the top	/r/Divorce_Men	07/01/26 05:03 AM
1	I’m curious how many men here have also experienced male pattern baldness prior to wife seeking divorce? Probably correlation rather than causation. Since men lose head hair as they age and aging can be accelerated by stress, women closer in age to their husbands get the visuals of no longer looking like a member of a “power couple” earlier than they imagined it would happen— with men losing that end of the deal earlier. I transitioned to male in my thirties and oh BOY did I see the disappointment when it didn’t mean I’d become a fellow hot and fierce individual. I’m the same person I was— with my …	/r/Divorce_Men	07/01/26 04:30 AM
1	Told her last night Yes. I’m just done sadly nodding my head when people who say they “do everything” ask for permission to bail. There’s an epidemic of avoidance going around and I am sick of seeing it enabled without question. Also yes— I’m looking forward to digging out of this medical odyssey. I’m lucky that she chose to do this now when my health is showing signs of looking up.	/r/Divorce_Men	06/01/26 11:49 PM
-1	Told her last night What to do? Keep talking to your wife and get BOTH of your asses into some counseling. It takes two to fail a relationship. Sorry for the tough assessment but you saying you “do all the things” screams “My pride is blinding me.” My wife said the same thing before she left me, somebody who couldn’t go on disability during his ridiculously long recovery from multiple medical crises because her breadwinning priced us out. The bedroom was dead for over two years because I couldn’t safely participate…	/r/Divorce_Men	06/01/26 04:34 PM
2	Thinking About Divorce? Read This First. Yep. These strategies that should be reserved for physically dangerous scenarios have been twisted into a way for women to save face at someone else’s expense instead of being emotionally honest and vulnerable with each other. Women as a whole don’t deserve to have men picking up this strategy too. Radical honesty, empathy, and vulnerability need to be the first line of advice out of a coach’s mouth.	/r/Divorce_Men	04/01/26 04:22 PM
2	Thinking About Divorce? Read This First. Paranoia makes EVERYTHING better.	/r/Divorce_Men	04/01/26 04:15 PM
3	Thinking About Divorce? Read This First. You sound like someone with an “MBA”— clickbait post title and all. Take your “this is a business decision” energy and dime-a-dozen advice back to where it came from and keep it there. Ya basic.	/r/Divorce_Men	04/01/26 04:13 PM
2	Wife Leans Narcissist My wife was in your shoes but instead of speaking up, she expected me to read her mind and realize that I was hurting her. I genuinely didn’t know that my way of communicating wasn’t understood the way I thought it was and if she had taken the risk of standing up for herself, we could have both grown into better people. Finding out that German “sturm and drang” was heard as targeted accusation by someone from a WASP background INSTANTLY took it out of my relationship toolbox, because the only th…	/r/Divorce_Men	02/01/26 09:34 PM
2	The treatment for divorce that worked for me 1 is the big one for me, ESPECIALLY since she had a gaming addiction bad enough to get me into “grinding” games next to her on the couch so we could spend more time near each other. The tug to force myself into long gaming sessions is extremely strong now that I live alone— so strong that I am probably to sell my consoles.	/r/Divorce_Men	02/01/26 12:58 AM
5	Gentleman- when did you know “I don’t love her anymore” Looking at her blog continuing to be full of horny memes and realizing that she has been like this since I sustained multiple major injuries years ago. She knew how troubled I was by her online behavior while I was going through so much, but she would apologize and then continue anyway. I was determined to forgive her in the long run because it seemed reasonable for a wife to need an outlet when her husband is coming to terms with years of physical and mental disability, along with all the limit…	/r/Divorce_Men	29/12/25 05:15 PM
4	Its Over Your last line is how I’m feeling. I’ve gained weight instead of losing it but I also struggle to sleep. I’m nearing the end of Month Five without her and am starting to see that some of the things I’ve kept around the house, even if they are unrelated to her, need to go, even if it’s just to give me a sense of resetting. I held myself back from leaving video game culture because my wife didn’t want to try anything new with me, so now is the time to leave the nerdy memorabilia behind and embrace…	/r/Divorce_Men	23/12/25 11:25 PM
3	I hate Christmas. I completely forgot it was Xmas until my way out the door at work today. Honestly, it’s kind of thrilling that I’m reverting back to my old unsentimental self already. No more dealing with my ex’s feelings of obligation to celebrate a holiday with people she didn’t like.	/r/Divorce_Men	22/12/25 10:21 PM
1	Everything collapsed at once and my wife just asked for a divorce A fellow Buddhist with terrible luck!	/r/Divorce_Men	21/11/25 10:10 AM
3	Biggest Fear? Losing my healthcare (which is going to happen) and having a medical emergency with no one around (not guaranteed to happen). If I have a stroke in my house or black out, people are unlikely to know within 24 hours.	/r/Divorce_Men	27/09/25 09:16 PM
3	Do you guys ever look at where the ex is now and feel bad? I’m feeling that right now because I made the mistake of checking one of her social media accounts. I’d forgotten how often our relationship had to compete with the conveyor belt of video game release hype. She’s going to need more than two months of no contact before she can even think about what she’s done because of all the holiday season games she’s ready to spend money on, but I won’t be able to wait for that. I have to find a lawyer so I don’t starve now that I’m a discarded house husband …	/r/Divorce_Men	21/09/25 10:22 PM
2	Feeling lonely Thank you. I needed to see this tonight.	/r/Divorce_Men	12/09/25 02:56 AM
6	Need Help! SAHD, wife decided she is unhappy and wants to divorce Glad I’m not alone in being a house husband with very little warning of your wife leaving. I’m really scared for the future right now.	/r/Divorce_Men	11/09/25 08:18 AM
2	Ex moved her stuff out of the house today. I'm shattered and a mess. I started doing this on Day One and it has helped me get through this first month relatively intact. Pro Tip: put on audiobooks about moving on interspersed with energizing music while you do it. It’s even better if you can listen to these things without headphones. Reclaim all of that space— even the air!	/r/Divorce_Men	02/09/25 06:18 AM
2	Money Question Tell her. “I don’t have much money, but [girl] if I did, I’d buy a big house where we both could live” are classic lyrics for a reason. Be with someone who can accept you for you— not your ease of circumstances.	/r/Divorce_Men	20/08/25 05:19 PM
5	Divorce made us stronger They weren’t married though…	/r/Divorce_Men	16/08/25 10:52 PM
2	4 Weeks Post-D-Day and Divorce: The Loneliness Is Crushing Find a goal or dedicate yourself to a cause. It’s helping immensely through my first week.	/r/Divorce_Men	06/08/25 03:52 AM
1	My (34M) wife (33F) shuts down emotionally and now I’m the villain. Mine started going to individual therapy at my behest but switched providers frequently and often after only one session before swapping them for another. We have been to multiple marriage counselors and each one has given us the same answer— that she is punishing me for normal setbacks and that she needs to focus on enjoying the things we already have. The individual therapist who proposed the idea of divorce to her is the one she’s decided to listen to. I’m giving her time to experience the “g…	/r/Divorce_Men	25/07/25 12:20 PM
7	My (34M) wife (33F) shuts down emotionally and now I’m the villain. A therapist told me the same thing and it took me a week coming to terms with it. My mind wanted to see the best in someone who has consistently abandoned me in hard but very acceptable situations. I hope your story doesn’t end up with her killing a relationship that only needed a little more patience, thoughtfulness, and respect like this ten-year marriage did. It took me a week of crying alone for me to bury the poor beaten dog that was my love for her and now her presence makes me feel sick. …	/r/Divorce_Men	25/07/25 11:24 AM
1	I think my marriage is falling apart, and I don’t know what to do anymore Sounds like mine. The lack of respect was tolerable for me until I started respecting myself. The love dried up on my end last week. As soon as she leaves, I’m spending time cramming all the homework I couldn’t do to get me out of this spiral of failure while she was kicking me in the back for not simultaneously serving her to her exact standards. She doesn’t deserve me and gets to live in one bedroom until the first day of her new lease. I’m angry and am capable of keeping it as cold as her cri…	/r/Divorce_Men	16/07/25 12:30 AM
7	Wife (29F) left me (36M) out of the blue - grieving loss of the life we'd built I’m going through the same situation. I was ready to support her all the way to the end. It’s been hard seeing those dreams crushed without even being given a chance. I cry about that the most.	/r/Divorce_Men	01/07/25 03:03 AM