~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | What do you most appreciate about the opposite sex?Very few comments about women even though this sub is male-dominated... Do the men here really have nothing good to say about women? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/10/22 05:49 AM |
| 10 | Would you prefer to have a single monogamous sexual relationship for your entire life with somebody you loved but only found moderately attractive. Or would be prefer to have an endless supply of causal sex with people you found extremely attractive but never formed an emotional bound with?Plenty of men do love monogamy. All the reasons you've outlined hold true, I think, and make for a pretty valid argument on social, emotional, and evolutionary levels. That said, I do think the tendency for monogamy or polygamy seems very much like a sexual orientation, in that it's partly socially defined (based on what is acceptable and what outlets are available) and partly biologically determined. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/09/22 02:37 AM |
| 1 | What's your unpopular opinion about women? Something you truly believe based on lived experience, but would get down voted to all hellI don't think you're wrong, but I probably wouldn't claim this is an inherent trait of women (not saying you're doing this). I think it's the current social acceptance of animosity against men due to the growing popularity of feminist ideas (some of which I support). Earlier, misogyny was the normalised way of being and it was mainstream. There is just a cultural shift now because of evolving social beliefs and women occupying a different position in society. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/09/22 11:44 PM |
| 2 | Over-socialization from social media has skewed the idea of conventionally attractive individualsYeah, I agree. Everyone has a personality. That's why I also say that you don't need a universally appealing personality, just one that appeals to someone you want to attract (and that's usually, but not always, someone similar to you). I also believe that everyone is "interesting", what differs is your ability to express the interesting parts of yourself. I find it hard to believe that most people don't have some complexity in their inner life that would be fascinating to understand. But not ev… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/08/22 12:09 PM |
| 1 | Ladies - how do you feel about the supposed trend that men are cold approaching less often these days?I think the effect is positive. In theory, I like being approached. I don't care if the guy is attractive to me or not. I appreciate the courage and that they make explicit something that they admire about me. It makes me feel good, and it does not require them being attractive for me to feel that way. So I don't actually relate to the whole "unattractive men who approach women are creeps". There are plenty of men I did not feel drawn to who approached me, and I politely rejected them, but did n… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/08/22 06:58 AM |
| 1 | Is the pandemic / current state of the global economy affecting women's taste in who they date at all?I think the anxiety caused by pandemic + lockdowns did change my approach to finding a partner. I used to be focused on whether someone makes me feel excited and good about myself. Now I'm more drawn to people who can support me and make me feel safe through bad times. So what you say is interesting because that certainly can be linked to masculine traits. But I don't think my previous preference was unlinked from masculinity. It might seem like what I'm suggesting is a preference for "beta" ove… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/08/22 06:38 AM |
| 1 | What is it about erotica that makes you gravitate towards it vs other kinds of porn?I vastly prefer erotica to pornography. Not even considering the moral/ethical aspect (which, I admit, is a bonus, but not really the motivating factor for me). In fact, I think erotica has more potential to be fucked up and extreme without the damaging effects of visual pornography that's more likely to cause over-stimulation and addiction. Three main reasons I prefer erotica: first, well-written erotica goes into psychology and the inner thoughts of the characters more deeply which is more aro… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/08/22 06:21 AM |
| 1 | What trait(s) automatically puts a man above average?Physically: Fit body/being athletic Non physical: Confidence | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/07/22 09:08 AM |
| 8 | Intelligence is not a positive trait if you want to have sexPrecisely. Intelligent people are appreciated by other intelligent people. Without necessarily elevating intelligence as some amazing trait, it's simply the fact that they will be more likely to understand each other. There are erotic elements to intellectual conversation, and it can definitely fuel passion. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/07/22 08:38 AM |
| 1 | Intelligence is not a positive trait if you want to have sexThat's really interesting. It definitely goes against my opinion which is a preference for intelligent partners and considering it an attractive trait. The way I see it, if someone who loves me is also intelligent, they will apply that intelligence to fulfilling my desires (sexual, romantic, whatever) and are therefore able to fulfill it better. But I do see how lower intelligence could be correlated to more sex too. Less awareness of negative consequences of sex (STIs, unwanted pregnancy, rape,… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/07/22 07:59 AM |
| – | Trust me, you don’t want to be a 10/10, anything above being general attractive attracts stalkers and craziesThat's the thing, though, creeps/sexual harassers are of a different variety from men who are interested in you. They are opportunistic, not really true evaluators of quality. I didn't get much normal interest as a teenager, not even from guys my age. I mean, I just cannot think of anyone finding a buck toothed, slouching 13 year old genuinely attractive over a 21 year old with aligned teeth and better posture. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/07/22 07:24 PM |
| – | Trust me, you don’t want to be a 10/10, anything above being general attractive attracts stalkers and craziesI knew someone would say that, but I cannot stress enough that I was truly not attractive as a teenager. Otherwise that would have been the more obvious explanation to me. Like I said, I had really bad teeth, and only got braces a bit later in life. So I was a late bloomer. Also didn't really have a nice body (flat chested, etc.) which I got later. Plus, I still do get attention, just not the creepy/harassment type. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/07/22 01:17 PM |
| 6 | Trust me, you don’t want to be a 10/10, anything above being general attractive attracts stalkers and craziesI'm not sure I entirely agree. Not a 10/10, but I got way more creepy attention and harassment as an awkward teenager with bad teeth than I do now, as a decent looking woman with fixed teeth. To me, it's pretty clear it has more to do with vulnerability and lack of confidence, where unsavoury men felt like they could mess with me because I wouldn't retaliate. That said, being the more attractive one in your peer group does come with a different set of challenges, and of course, might increase th… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/07/22 10:52 AM |
| 1 | Over-socialization from social media has skewed the idea of conventionally attractive individualsHmm, that's interesting. I suppose you also have to find someone who is so inclined. I wonder if there is a cultural aspect to it (I'm not from the USA). But looks have never been a deal breaker for me, and I've been deeply attracted to men who weren't good looking. My culture is perhaps not as looks-focused, or maybe it's just how I am as an individual. I do find it quite easy to "see the best" in others which I'm sure makes it easier for me to get feelings for them. Also, for what it's worth, … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/07/22 02:10 PM |
| 1 | How does being asexual impact my value as a man?I dated a guy who has a low libido while I'm pretty high libido. Tbh, it was probably the best relationship I had and I think he was HV because of being sort of asexual. He didn't care about getting sex so he never chased women for superficial or short-term gains. He only pursued people he genuinely liked, was extremely confident and not dependent on sexual validation to feel worthy as a man. He also put a lot of his energy in other pursuits and skills, which made him extremely capable. I'd prob… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/07/22 11:22 AM |
| 2 | Over-socialization from social media has skewed the idea of conventionally attractive individualsI'm inclined to agree. I feel like virtual environments can never capture the full spectrum of attractiveness. You may be exposed to super models virtually, but the allure of someone attractive right next to you, even if they aren't as conventionally beautiful as a super model, is an entirely different and more real / raw feeling. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/07/22 10:58 AM |
| 7 | Over-socialization from social media has skewed the idea of conventionally attractive individualsWhich is exactly why "personality" is all the more important now. I know "personality" has been getting a lot of flak on the front page of late, but in my experience (and the experience of many other women I know), liking someone for their personality and deeper reasons also lends to a positive perception of their physical appearance over time. I've experienced this many times, where a guy didn't stand out to me at first in terms of appearance. But I got to know him, appreciated his personality … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/07/22 10:54 AM |
| 9 | Over-socialization from social media has skewed the idea of conventionally attractive individualsRelevant. I've always disliked taking pictures because it triggers some compulsion in me about how this isn't what I "really look like". I don't trust photos because I never feel like they represent my true appearance due to angles, lighting, translation to 2D, etc. When I was on OLD, I always preferred that my photos be a little uglier than I look IRL anyway, since I like pleasantly surprising people. But it's so much worse now. I noticed that "beauty mode" is an in-built feature in most phone … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/07/22 10:44 AM |
| 11 | If familiarity kills attraction, do ALL LTR's EVENTUALLY become void of attraction?Frankly, it's surprising to me that this even has to be asked. I'm not that surprised, I doubt most people here have had successful LTRs. The focus of this subreddit has always been superficial attraction and sex, I rarely see people here discussing how to sustain long term relationships or the qualities within it. I don't blame them though, because I suppose it does make sense that their priority is to get into a relationship to begin with, which requires consideration of superficial factors. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/07/22 06:51 PM |
| 1 | How Much Is Too Much: N-Count Baseline Answer?Great. That sounds like a good way to ensure a healthy genetic mix in the offspring. Now it's up to men to play nice. (PS: I know this is about flies, but even if we assume it's true for humans, this only appears to me like more evidence for why women should sleep around.) | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/07/22 08:42 AM |
| 4 | Women live in 'post nut clarity' due to being the less horny gender. This is one of the main drivers of female pickiness.I always thought it's more that women tend to have a more complicated sexuality, which is what makes them more picky. Many studies have shown women seek out novelty in sex and after a year or two into a relationship their desire to have sex with their partner dips. Not their desire to have sex at all (which is why I don't really buy the "women are built for monogamy" thing). I think women also need more narrative and intricacy in their sexual expectations whereas most men are more simple in what… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/07/22 05:44 AM |
| 2 | Women outnumbering Men in college.I'm not entirely convinced that being in college is such a good thing any more. Women may outnumber men in colleges but colleges are hotbeds for academic identity politics related cults and propaganda, especially in liberal arts which is dominated by women. I really think these places discourage critical thinking, contrary to their claim of the opposite. And this is a problem for women (although I acknowledge that in the current environment, academic degrees are enabling for economic prospects).… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/07/22 03:58 AM |
| 6 | Why is the physical act of cheating so devastating to men?Yeah, fair enough. I think it depends on what one values in a monogamous relationship. A lot of guys appreciate the promise of sexual exclusivity offered by monogamous relationships as it alleviates insecurity. It also indicates some semblance of discipline/self control to refrain from sexual activity even when the desire is there, making someone appear trustworthy through actions rather than feelings. I just wanted to dispel the notion that an "emotional affair" is just "being close" to someone… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/06/22 07:42 AM |
| 10 | What are you and why? (Also why are you here?)what are you? 28F. I call myself purple pill because I pick and choose from red and blue pill ideas and see the benefits but also flaws in both ways of thinking. I'm not attached to the categorisation, though. I'm a self proclaimed fence sitter and I prefer it that way, it allows me a better view. Introverted but socially fluent. why are you? I've always been drawn to theories around intersexual relations, especially dating and romance. I benefit a lot from reading things from the male perspecti… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/06/22 06:37 AM |
| 4 | Women are attracted to men with social intelligence, which is why you can't understand women's strugglesI agree completely with you. Not all women value social intelligence. There are just as many women who are drooling idiots socially and a woman who's socially stupid isn't going to value a socially intelligent man... because a socially intelligent man would value things she doesn't. (IE a woman who likes to be loud in restaurants and who litters at parks isn't going to want a man who is constantly asking her to lower her voice or telling her to pick up her trash.) To add to this, I'm not sociall… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/06/22 05:40 AM |
| 39 | Why is the physical act of cheating so devastating to men?I do wonder if this misunderstanding of an "emotional" affair posed by /u/Watahandrew1 is why men think they don't care as much about it? An emotional affair means having strong romantic feelings for someone else. It most definitely includes sexual fantasies (even if not consummated). It is also a stronger and more sustained feeling than a casual fling. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/06/22 01:32 AM |
| 1 | What age does pretty privilege run out for women?i think it was men trying to be honest with women and at least provide some tangible metric for women to roughly gauge their appeal. It depends. In many instances I've noticed, it didn't really seem like honesty. That said, I don't deny that age is a factor in appearance. Which is why I said the propaganda is only a part of it (and that was in response to the OP's observation). the amount of 50 y/o that look better then 20 y/o are certainly an exception. the most probable way is if the 20 y/o is… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/06/22 12:57 AM |
| 20 | What age does pretty privilege run out for women?Are these Reddit girls lying to make men seem more sexist than they are or are they just fat in real life or do women really become invisible after 30? I suspect it is, at least in part, propaganda created by men to make women feel like their worth will go down with age and thereby elevate their own worth. The truth is obviously that this is very variable, there are 50 year old women and men who could look better than their 20 year old counterparts. Confidence, comfort with oneself, wisdom, etc.… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/06/22 02:36 AM |
| 0 | I believe the main problem in dating is the unwillingness from both gender to listen to one another.I mean, you could certainly improve your ability to do that if you listened. I'm not saying it requires no effort. Your insertion of "listening" in quotes indicates that you don't actually understand that listening is a skill. Not something passive. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/06/22 10:04 AM |
| 0 | I believe the main problem in dating is the unwillingness from both gender to listen to one another.Then you need to figure it out the best way you can. You can't expect to get by in life with everything being made explicit. Trust me, I would love that myself. I just realised at some point that that's not how people work: like you correctly say, some people are really good liars. Sometimes people don't even know themselves, and speak from a place of ignorance. Sometimes it's a matter of social propriety. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/06/22 09:58 AM |
| 1 | Q4W: We always hear about 50/50 vs men paying 100% but what about 80/20?I'm not fully subscribed to any school of thought with regards to dating. I go with intuition and bits and pieces of schools of thought that make sense to me. But I've always thought splitting expenses proportional to income is fair. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/06/22 09:53 AM |
| 2 | I believe the main problem in dating is the unwillingness from both gender to listen to one another.And you shouldn't. Part of "listening" is to weed out the men who aren't interested in what you're interested in. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/06/22 09:39 AM |
| 0 | I believe the main problem in dating is the unwillingness from both gender to listen to one another."Listening" doesn't necessarily mean hearing what they say to you, it's listening to what they say to each other as well. Thankfully, men use the internet more extensively than women to express themselves, so there's a lot more information about their thoughts out there. If you care enough about how men are, you should seek it out. If you don't care, it isn't a problem anyway. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/06/22 09:39 AM |
| 2 | I believe the main problem in dating is the unwillingness from both gender to listen to one another.Exactly. I think what you're saying makes sense. I have benefited from visiting male dominated spaces on the internet. Yes, some of it may be distasteful, initially off-putting, and offensive but I have really thick skin so I manage to look beyond that and see what's at the core of it. I think very few people are actually and irredeemably evil and malicious. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/06/22 08:40 AM |
| 2 | I believe the main problem in dating is the unwillingness from both gender to listen to one another.Right, but listening to them helps you understand their methods to do so. You can then counter it by demanding more genuine connections and relationships, and figuring out how to get that from men. It's not like men are incapable of emotional attachment, you just need to employ certain strategies to get it from them (if it doesn't come naturally to you). Then, slowly, a cultural shift will occur. Things don't come easily or instantly. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/06/22 08:37 AM |
| 2 | I believe the main problem in dating is the unwillingness from both gender to listen to one another.You listen to men, in order to understand their needs, motivations, methods, and interests. That awareness will protect you from getting used by men for sex, or, in case you want casual sex, be aware of its abundant availability. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/06/22 08:25 AM |
| 3 | It is unbelievable how hostile the mainstream is to even the most innocent attempt by men to "learn" anything dating, courtship or romance-relatedI don't find the comments on that post hostile, personally. Some of it may be misleading, sure, but that's mostly because people don't really understand social hacks or the systematisation of social communication. They expect it to be intuitive to everyone when that's not the case. I completely support systematic approaches to conversation and dating and it's the only thing that works for some (I recommend the show 'Love on the Spectrum'). I'm a woman and I have a similar approach to making conv… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/06/22 08:05 AM |
| 2 | New FDS Spotify Page! Now with SIX Playlists! Please post any songs you would like to nominate for the playlist under "FDS Anthems" on the Subreddit or the Website! Thanks!Little Simz - Selfish Not just super catchy, but the lyrics are also total FDS. "I can't sleep at night I don't wanna fight My best friend is I I'm so selfish Guess I'm in denial Maybe I'm wrong, you're right Heard it all my life I'm so selfish Ah-ah-ah-ah-huh I'm so selfish Ah-ah-ah-ah-huh I'm so selfish Got a very big ego Embedded in me that's the heritage ego And let 'em hate, they ain't messing with the steeze though And now I'm here, can't entertain no bummy niggas Need my nigga fresh in a … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/01/21 07:41 AM |
| 59 | Woman Leaves BDSM community because, surprise surprise, they protected the powerful man who did things to her without her consent. Who would have guessed a community based on sexualized misogyny would do such a thing?!" I didn’t want to admit that maybe I hadn’t been on board for everything. I was smarter than that, wasn’t I? I must have wanted it." On a subconscious level, I think this is what every Pickmeisha/Libfem/kink-porn-sex worker apologist feels. They're so deep in the rabbit hole of this fucked up shit, that they think surely they must want it. Otherwise how do they justify their indulgence? Disclaimer to anyone who has these thoughts: It's okay to have made mistakes. It's okay to not have made the … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/20 04:25 PM |
| 16 | Woman Leaves BDSM community because, surprise surprise, they protected the powerful man who did things to her without her consent. Who would have guessed a community based on sexualized misogyny would do such a thing?!Love Dr Jessica Taylor! Thank you for sharing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/20 04:24 PM |
| 5 | Whitney Cummings: Men vs Women Lying (based & pinkpilled)Haha, I just watched her special 'Money Shot' on Netflix. So many FDS/pinkpill truths - I wonder if she's secretly here under an alt. :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/20 03:13 PM |
| 134 | Men who claim they “can’t cum with a condom on” have been assaulting their brains and penises with porn. IMMEDIATE DUMP.Recent post on TwoXSex has a scrote who's insecure because his dick gets soft when he puts a condom on, and so his poor partner agreed to accommodate his desire for unprotected sex. Of course, that turned out VERY badly for her. Never engage with men who think their dick is more important than your sexual and reproductive health. They are sick and deluded. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 04:32 PM |
| 14 | Where is a good place to meet a potential HVM?With men, we must always be wary. Completely agreed. Some do indeed fuel their narcissism or enjoy virtue signalling through the garb of volunteer work. But the odds would be slightly less stacked against us there. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 03:47 PM |
| 13 | Where is a good place to meet a potential HVM?I posted this question a while ago over here. The response that really stood out to me was about looking for HVM who are volunteers or involved in some kind of non-profit work. Tells you a lot about their character. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 03:41 PM |
| 86 | male redditors after making their 567th "unzips pants" jokeThey all probably think they also look like this relatively decent looking dude. But unfortunately, that's a big no. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 08:58 AM |
| 3 | Why Are One Night Stands Being Advertised to Girls as “Strong and Empowering” instead of “Risky and Reckless”?OH! No, you misunderstood. Or perhaps I was unclear. I wasn't aware of those connotations just because someone refuses to have sex with someone who has STIs. I definitely don't mean that anyone is obliged to have sex with anyone who has STIs! I'm just talking about the general cultural approach to how STIs are treated in mainstream media, among social circles, etc. Of course everyone has the right to know what STIs someone has before making a decision whether or not to take the risk of having se… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 08:34 AM |
| 119 | As a white guy you should be thankful I give you attention...I would have stolen this, but my goal in life is to not engage with such men at all or give them any attention. Temptation can be strong though. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 07:45 AM |
| 3 | Why Are One Night Stands Being Advertised to Girls as “Strong and Empowering” instead of “Risky and Reckless”?When we shame people for having STIs and stigmatise them, we forget that anyone could get it - it's just that the risk increases if you have more casual sex and unprotected sex. If you're sexually active, no matter how careful, you are at potential risk of STIs. Not to mention, of course, horrible situations where people have gotten STIs because of rape and sexual assault. Mocking someone or ostracising them for having an STI is not the way to go, at all. The more we contribute to this, the more… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/20 07:17 AM |
| 27 | Why Are One Night Stands Being Advertised to Girls as “Strong and Empowering” instead of “Risky and Reckless”?Completely agreed. It is important not to shame people for STIs. Women are especially vulnerable to them. When we shame people and stigmatise STIs, we make sure they never disclose/never get tested. Anyone who's having sex should be talking about STIs. But NO one likes to have this conversation. Because it's "unsexy". I just roll my eyes and leave. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 02:07 PM |
| 2 | I have decided to swear off love and stay permanently single, and I have never felt happier or more relieved in my life. This sub has helped me a lot getting there. So, thank you ❤️Every time I see posts like this, it gives me so much joy. Love seeing more and more women embrace FDS. It's fucking changed my life, that's for sure - not just the sub itself, but everything that it led me to. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 02:01 PM |
| 13 | The idea that hetero couples watching porn together is a “fun’n’sexy” bonding activity which demarcates the woman as a body-confident and self-assured ‘cool girlfriend,’ is so revolting.Laughed hard at this conversation. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 01:58 PM |
| 18 | The idea that hetero couples watching porn together is a “fun’n’sexy” bonding activity which demarcates the woman as a body-confident and self-assured ‘cool girlfriend,’ is so revolting.Spot on. Terrible farce being fed to us. So many women I know who reluctantly participate in this porn-watching with their partner, just to appease him. It's what the cool girls do now. Even before I knew about the horrors of the porn industry and how important it is to stay away from porn, I never particularly understood the appeal of watching porn with your partner. I tried it, and I always thought it was terribly awkward. It didn't turn me on either (then again, no porn does). I got told that… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/20 01:58 PM |
| 3 | There are three major things that define emotional maturity. Look for these three things!Great points! A clearly defined set of morals This has been surprisingly hard for me to find. I have spoken to men who keep talking about moral relativism and how theoretically anything can be justified. No. I need to date someone who operates under a coherent moral framework. I don't care that it is based on "relative moralistic ideas", I need to know you have principles that you live by, I need to know that you won't attempt to "justify" everything. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/05/20 11:50 PM |
| 6 | Men abhor the idea of a woman who is both intelligent and beautiful so much, to the point where they've convinced themselves that this completely irrational stereotype is a truth.This is why the media is always praising 'women who don't know they are beautiful' because confidence and knowing your options is very threatening to an LVM's ego. However LVM will try run this shit on a woman whether she is beautiful or not...they'll just jump through a tad more hoops for the beautiful one ( as in they're willing to pay for a couple of dates)...but the end result is still the same: misogyny and bullshit. Great comment and very well said over here. We are forced to undermine our… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/05/20 11:25 PM |
| 7 | Men abhor the idea of a woman who is both intelligent and beautiful so much, to the point where they've convinced themselves that this completely irrational stereotype is a truth.which is so common in women who want to defend themselves but don't want to seem full of themselves at the same time. This, I completely object to the way women are supposed to not acknowledge their attractiveness or any of their good qualities, so as not to seem too "full of themselves". We cannot be undermining ourselves. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/05/20 11:24 PM |
| 7 | Men abhor the idea of a woman who is both intelligent and beautiful so much, to the point where they've convinced themselves that this completely irrational stereotype is a truth.Completely agreed - misogyny runs deep. Hating any woman is hating all women, really. I mostly wanted to make a point about how men are threatened by good looking and intelligent women because it brings them to face the reality that just because they're unattractive doesn't make them smart - which they seem to so desperately believe. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/05/20 11:22 PM |
| 25 | Purple pill SubGoes to show, that when women can have their own space, they're gonna take it and be grateful for it. On the other hand, men can't leave women's spaces alone, despite having plenty of spaces to themselves. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/05/20 10:57 AM |
| 19 | Always the better alternative.Agreed completely. :) The last sentence could have been left out. At the same time, we can't deny that pickmes do make things worse for us as well. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/05/20 02:10 PM |
| 15 | Always the better alternative.Haha, this isn't me! But I'll take your upvote because I agree in spirit. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/05/20 12:57 PM |
| 20 | Always the better alternative.Just a fun reminder. I'm guessing it isn't real. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/05/20 12:56 PM |
| 66 | Always the better alternative.Haha. Yes. Let's add to the list: Usually nice to look at. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/05/20 09:37 AM |
| 16 | r/TwoXSex users are upset males refuse to respect their female only space, dominate the conversation, derail the discussion, and force women to constantly cater to their feelings and pervert behavior. 😡BAN THEM ALL. Signed, an FDS MOD.So unsurprising. I feel like we have many potential recruits to /r/FDS from there. This is the only space I've talked the most openly in when it comes to sex. And the stringent ban on dudes is what makes it possible. Thank you for your work in keeping this space so safe, admins! I'm indebted to it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/05/20 10:08 AM |
| 5 | LVM DATING 101 🤡Please tell me more about why you think so! I'm also bi, and I don't get to meet that many women, so I've not fared well there either. But I'd like to know your reasons! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/20 03:27 PM |
| 102 | Men complain about how women use too much toilet paper. Yet you hold your genitals when you pee and some of you don’t even wash your hands afterwards🤢 I’ve legit seen guys write on Reddit ‘iTs bCus mY dIcK iS cLeAN’ lol no it ain’t....Unfortunately, I know all too well of the smell you're referring to. That stale piss stank. Shudder. And then they expect us to suck it and act offended if we don't. The gall. Whereas natural smelling vaginas are gross and nasty to them. Fuck right off. I just don't suck dick any more. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/05/20 11:16 AM |
| 330 | Men complain about how women use too much toilet paper. Yet you hold your genitals when you pee and some of you don’t even wash your hands afterwards🤢 I’ve legit seen guys write on Reddit ‘iTs bCus mY dIcK iS cLeAN’ lol no it ain’t....I used to be so paranoid about how my vagina smells. Before getting intimate I'd scrub and wash and stick my fingers in and sniff. Because of the widespread "knowledge" that vaginas smell like fish and are terrible. Men? They sometimes pee before sex and don't even wash after... And then they expect you to suck their dick... Fuckin nasty. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/05/20 07:20 AM |
| 32 | Look how happy and free she was in old age, I want to get to this level of not needing a manMoana is an absolutely wonderful movie! No unnecessary love interest, just a strong, brave girl on an adventure, with an awesome mentor. Albeit with a terrible companion. Is it just me or does everyone really hate that chicken? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/05/20 07:17 AM |
| 15 | Hopefully after leveling up, we choose neither!You raise a good point, and in fact, I have actually met a few handsome nerdy guys, but they're a rarity. But you're right that fucking less/being ugly to begin with turns them towards these pursuits. While perhaps being attractive and athletic to begin with turns jocks towards their pursuits. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/04/20 02:37 PM |
| 4 | Hopefully after leveling up, we choose neither!Haha, that's not to say they must all be terrible. Keep your feelers open. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/04/20 02:36 PM |
| 12 | Hopefully after leveling up, we choose neither!Haha! The guy in the post was being sarcastic and calling out this mentality, actually. But yeah, about nerdy guys - completely agreed that their reputation is now worse of jocks. While jocks you can expect to be basic fuck boys, nerdy dudes are insidious now with their rampant Internet misogyny and literal plans and fantasies to be violent towards women. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/04/20 02:35 PM |
| 177 | Hopefully after leveling up, we choose neither!Preach. Nerdiness has just become virtue signalling for intelligence. It doesn't mean "I've watched 1029374795840494 science fiction movies and shows like a brain dead person in front of the screen". There has to be some critical faculties functioning. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/04/20 02:18 PM |
| 62 | Hopefully after leveling up, we choose neither!Seek someone outside of tech! I feel like those spaces are too homosocial and consequently very misogynist. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/04/20 02:15 PM |
| 465 | LMAO Man wanted to incorporate porn into his relationship, but fiancee exclusively likes Interracial Porn featuring black men with huge penises and now his fee fees are hurt. Reminder that men are full of shit and hypocritical about porn use in a relationship.Men have the most fragile egos and are beyond sensitive over dumb shit. I remember an ex of mine (when I was practically a child - 16), liking pages like "I like big butts" and "Big tits are awesome" on social media and he told me that it's just a "manly" thing to do, to affirm his love for all of that. I was like, okay, and I linked him ONE video, mind you, ONE SINGLE VIDEO of Chris Evans' butt looking good and he became incredibly upset - talking about how he doesn't like me talking about othe… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/04/20 06:35 AM |
| 69 | After 43 years of marriage, a man is pressed and bothered that his wife might have slept with someone with a larger penis than him a full FOUR AND HALF DECADES ago.Laughing at this. I don't have any sympathy for men being insecure about their dick sizes, because they bring it upon themselves. Unlike women who are insecure about their bodies, which is because men impose these horrible porn standards on them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/04/20 06:31 AM |
| 10 | Almost 100% of our cultural sexual terminology is centered around men’s pleasure and we should be outraged.Not at all, please go ahead. :) Always glad to share. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/04/20 10:41 AM |
| 14 | one important yet often understated piece of advice for women who want to start dating HVMThere's the FDS chat room, Gender Critical has a discord server, online communities are your best bet. You can always trust us to keep your best interests at heart and give you (as far as possible) advice that we think will work best for you, and unconditional support. :) I know what you mean though, I have two very close HV female friends but they are hard to find as libfem is the dominant discourse. I still cherish my pickme friends and always look out for them, but the relationship isn't the … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/04/20 08:50 AM |
| 130 | Starfish Sex = She Doesn’t Want to Fuck You. If this is a habitual occurrence, you’re definitely a creep and probably a rapist.So true. On top of that - porn sick men expect all these theatrics from women during sex! Even if they're having a good time they have to show it in over the top ways. Moan loudly, grind hips, squirt, etc. They have such a skewed view on how women actually express enjoyment and desire. When I was younger, I literally had to take my mind off my own pleasure in order to perform these theatrics. Faking orgasms actually got in the way of my real orgasm! All because I was worried the dude would think… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/04/20 08:44 AM |
| 52 | Almost 100% of our cultural sexual terminology is centered around men’s pleasure and we should be outraged.On point! I have tried to rack my brains as to how LibFem can be okay with this and not see the glaring inequalities and double standards in the realm of sexual pleasure and desire. Because for all its flaws, even ostensibly, isn't lib fem still geared towards supporting women? Why do they talk so much about catering to men's desire and falsely incorporating it as women's desire also, why is the suggestion always to be "more adventurous" and "more kinky", and never to assert your own desires and… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/04/20 08:29 AM |
| 6 | Woman upset that her boyfriend watches Porn. Advice columnists Rich Juzwiak & Stoya shame her for questioning his masturbation habits without ever addressing the porn. Mainstream Liberal media deliberately makes women feel like outliers for not accepting porn use.LMAO. I love this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/20 08:55 AM |
| 3 | Woman upset that her boyfriend watches Porn. Advice columnists Rich Juzwiak & Stoya shame her for questioning his masturbation habits without ever addressing the porn. Mainstream Liberal media deliberately makes women feel like outliers for not accepting porn use.But of course, it's Stoya. I actually agree that partnered sex and solo masturbation are different practices (that certainly is the case for me) but the dependence on porn for masturbation is absolutely not a given. You're right, they're not addressing the porn he's watching, offering suggestions for other means of sexual stimulus, etc. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/04/20 08:53 AM |
| 14 | Women are waking up 👏👏I saw it! I am AMAZED at the very obvious double standards here. Notice how the women's rating guide has all these detailed definitions assessing every fucking part of her face (maxilla, buccal fat, WHAT) and proportions, symmetry, and what not. While for men? Just image examples. Unfortunately, reflects the world we live in. Basically any male that has a square bull dog jaw gets rated at least a 7. Some of them are straight hideous, but their jaw looks like a right angle so apparently they’re “… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/20 01:40 PM |
| 78 | Women are waking up 👏👏No clue. I don't need validation from a bunch of greasy neck beards. Also, the 5.5, as per their rating guide (please check out this masterfully crafted manual) is just above average. Lots of beautiful women feature as examples on that list. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/20 05:12 AM |
| 57 | Women are waking up 👏👏I just saw their "rating guide" and it sickened me. One part is that I don't even agree with their assessment of attractiveness and the examples they've given for each category. The second is just discomfort with number ratings. What even. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/20 05:11 AM |
| 2 | Here’s what talking to brown men online is like 🙄Yeah. As a South Asian woman, while it's true that there is more cultural and societal misogyny there, which in turn translates to this kind of behaviour, it is hugely unfair to imply that MOC are just worse - that is racism. I have met a few HVMoC (and of course, that was because they had better exposure and education opportunities) and would actually prefer to date MOC over white men because they are more understanding of race issues. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/04/20 02:16 PM |
| 30 | A year ago, I would have agreed with this intentionally reductive/misleading bullshit. Thanks to this sub for helping me recognize the pickme mindsets that continue to pit women against themselves. Never devalue yourself for basic boyfriend courtesy.Men like to present it as a 'nagging woman' who won't let him have his hobbies. But that is really not the case. There are countless posts just on /r/AITA or /r/relationships about how these men make video games their life. Ignoring the needs and safety OF THEIR OWN CHILDREN. They don't do chores, they're willing to live in filth, consuming days old cheetos from their unkempt beards, let alone spend quality time with their partner. I love playing video games too, but I try to be a well rounded i… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/20 09:28 AM |
| 1 | I hate porn and sex worker pickmeishasYour point is duly noted. I see now that you mean to criticise women who support sex work/pornography and engage in it, thereby furthering the shittiness for other women who end up bearing the consequences of abusive and porn sick men. They're a tiny minority, yet they're unfortunately the most vocal minority, because they're the ones who have to be put up on display so as to ensure the continuation of these exploitative industries. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/04/20 07:23 AM |
| 16 | “hE’s A sImP”COMPLETELY agree. I was shocked to hear the kind of situations "Simp" was used in and that it was actually an insult. Ugh. This is how homosocial crowds of men further propagate the idea that mistreating women is somehow the right way to be. Men need to use their critical thinking more, and realise that they can only benefit from treating women with respect and kindness. I think the ones shouting simp are failing so miserably with women, they're outraged to see the success men have when they're … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/04/20 07:18 AM |
| 2 | We need to stop letting society pitch us against each other - we are stronger togetherAbsolutely agreed. I will always try to support women, even the pickmeishas, even the ones I disagree with. On a fundamental level my empathy and compassion for women will never cease. Of course, whether I choose to be close to them or not is a different matter, but you're completely right that we need to show a united front and be there for each other. I've grown so much only because I am lucky enough to have wonderful close female friends. I shudder to think what women who "only hang out with … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/04/20 09:09 AM |
| 14 | Men always get credit for women’s inventions—and there’s a term for thatOr the fact that women, for the biggest part in history and even today in many parts of the world, were not even able to get an education, vote or even leave the house or the room unchaperoned. How is someone not even afforded basic human rights, dignity and respect be supposed to "invent" and "build" and "create"? So true. And yet, despite this, we have stories of fantastic women who defeated these horrific odds and contributed to their fields. Also, this is true of any marginalised population … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/03/20 10:21 AM |
| 47 | What Kind of Young Women (20s) Date Much Older Men (40s and up)?Don't be embarrassed to admit it (I mean, beyond the embarrassment needed to ensure you never go back there...)! You're helping so many young women who are in your position by sharing your story. I know a lot of posts on here talk about how we shouldn't have pickmeisha friends and how they bring us down, which is valid for many reasons - but I think it kind of ignores the fact that that's where many of us were and all of us needed various things to get out of it - including the support of strong… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/03/20 10:10 AM |
| 69 | RIP Jyoti. Justice was truly served for you. But it made me realise that I don’t see many stories like this where the violent men are being adequately punished for their abhorrent crimes.The perpetrator's lawyer actually had the gall to question WHY she was out at night with a male friend. The audacity and sheer lack of empathy to suggest that this was somehow deserved?! Fuck. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/03/20 04:01 AM |
| 13 | In need of adviceWhy is it that men are either so afraid of a false accusation that they can’t interact with women in a normal fashion or they still imagine this is okay behavior. Perhaps the truth is that men actually WANT to be able to harass women, but they can't say that, so they pretend that false accusations are a way bigger issue than it actually is. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/03/20 03:59 AM |
| 57 | RIP Jyoti. Justice was truly served for you. But it made me realise that I don’t see many stories like this where the violent men are being adequately punished for their abhorrent crimes.I'm not pro gun ownership, EXCEPT if it's only in the hands of women. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/03/20 03:49 AM |
| 27 | RIP Jyoti. Justice was truly served for you. But it made me realise that I don’t see many stories like this where the violent men are being adequately punished for their abhorrent crimes.Yep, this is frequent in highly publicised rape cases in India. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/03/20 03:48 AM |
| 29 | RIP Jyoti. Justice was truly served for you. But it made me realise that I don’t see many stories like this where the violent men are being adequately punished for their abhorrent crimes.One of them committed suicide in custody, I believe. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/03/20 03:47 AM |
| 28 | Fake feminist pickmeishas.Precisely! You really hit the nail on the head. These superficial forms of equality are just more ways that men benefit | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/20 04:33 PM |
| 24 | Fake feminist pickmeishas.Yeah, her implication was so insulting. Anyway, my boyfriend was entirely on my side, so I'm glad for that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/20 04:32 PM |
| 33 | Fake feminist pickmeishas.This is the typical scenario. Ugh, it's maddening and infuriating. I wish they'd speak up, then again, a really HVM shouldn't even have to be told. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/20 04:31 PM |
| 9 | Common courtesy things your bf should be doingAgreed with almost everything. Never ever feel selfish for expecting all of this. Remember you have so much to offer as well, these are all basic things he can and should do. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/03/20 05:17 AM |
| 24 | The thing that turns a HVM on most should be his partner's pleasure.What you mention here about effort is a VERY important point. Great addition. You're right, it's not just being turned on by a woman's pleasure but willing to work to actually get it rather than expecting it to be handled on a platter to them. As you rightly said, this reflects in their general approach to things in life - professionally, financially, personally, etc. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/20 09:15 PM |
| 70 | Being "too sensitive" is not a bad thing.. in fact you're almost naturally "leveled up" because of it!Agreed completely. Sensitivity and empathy are such crucial traits to being a good human being, and ideally, that ought to be the way one measures success. Your empathy will always get you far, even if it hurts you in the process | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/20 09:12 PM |
| 1 | Feminism has argued for my equality, but has FAILED to aggressively defend my interests - this is why women need FDS and Feminism needs FDSFully agreed. I mean, the core texts of FDS are pretty racist and subscribe largely to white women's beauty ideals. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/20 04:29 PM |
| 2 | Feminism has argued for my equality, but has FAILED to aggressively defend my interests - this is why women need FDS and Feminism needs FDS/u/bloompth is absolutely right. I enjoy this sub a lot, but as a South Asian woman I've seen instances on this sub that jerked me back into reality, and made me realise that I won't find full representation here. I'll always be of another world. That's not to say FDS holds no merit for me - it absolutely does! In fact, I consider it partially our responsibility as non-white women to enrich FDS by adding nuance to the conversation on race. But it's up to the others to take what we have to offer.… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/20 04:28 PM |
| 10 | The Love is Blind (Netflix) drinking game.And why Barnett? Ugh! He's disgusting. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/03/20 07:46 PM |
| 9 | The Love is Blind (Netflix) drinking game.He keeps talking about their connection, and she keeps talking about the lack of connection. Both Jessica and Mark have no self respect. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/03/20 07:46 PM |
| 13 | The Love is Blind (Netflix) drinking game.She's so awkward and has no self-respect. Also, Barnett is gross. I can't believe he was the one so many of them fought over. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/03/20 07:45 PM |
| 10 | The Love is Blind (Netflix) drinking game.LMAO yes, probably switch it around. HVMs and HVWs get a drink, everything else - chug water. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/03/20 07:44 PM |
| 25 | Reconciling with FDS while having the personality of a provider - what should I do!?Thank you! This makes so much sense. You're right, the issue isn't with having that personality as long as I ensure that it's channelled to people who deserve it and appreciate it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/03/20 07:53 AM |
| 15 | Remember, most of the world is pro-FDSAs someone who actually lived in South Asia, I think it's very much a stretch to say that it's "Pro FDS". I'm not trying to shit on the countries mentioned, but I don't think it can be summed up in "every culture has its problematic aspects". What you've mentioned - the principle of men as providers - is just ONE aspect of FDS. And yes, you're 100% correct that this is generally the cultural practice in many non Anglo countries, however, this too is not rooted in empowerment but in subjugation o… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/02/20 03:33 PM |
| 8 | PSA: Never be uncomfortable for a manYes yes yes. The best lesson I ever learned was this! The way I rationalised it to myself was - I always want to be comfortable. I never want to be in physical discomfort or anguish, ideally. If being with a certain man would require me to be uncomfortable then what's the point? I just won't ever be truly happy. I'd rather be at ease, in complete comfort, and find someone who loves me just as I am. Even if that's rarer to find, it's so much more worthwhile. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/20 06:56 AM |
| 13 | The "peak" for women really is in our youth. But it's not a peak in achievement, happiness or looks. It's a peak in exploitation and being used.This is so very insightful. A brilliant message and so true. When I was in my so-called "prime" from 18-22, I was completely obsessed with my appearance and seeking out validation for the same. That's also when I got the most attention from men, especially older men, who were trying to exploit me for my sexuality in the ways you describe - imposing "sex positivity" on me, forcing me to do things I don't like, etc. And of course, the very same men praised me for it. "Wow you're one of the most se… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/02/20 05:40 AM |
| 3 | From a single mom to youMakes sense, however, do make sure that this man isn't breeding misogyny or passing on any of his terrible behaviours to your son. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/20 06:39 AM |
| 36 | Rape obsessed LVM rapes his GF three weeks after she was sexually assaulted. Pickmeisha GF describes him as "fantastic".Yep. Any man who experiences any kind of arousal with the lack of enthusiastic consent has to be avoided. I find it almost sociopathic. I mean, I put myself in those shoes - if I don't feel like the person with me is 100% into it, I would be turned off and sick that I made someone feel this way. How do men not feel the same way? It's frightening. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/20 07:56 PM |
| 9 | My friend praised a man for offering to split costs of the morning-after pill 🤦🏼♀️Absolutely agreed. This is how it was for me. It's hard to unlearn the conditioning that women's sexuality is something shameful. Having casual sex helped me get past that and demystify my body and sexuality. And now I'm at a point where I recognise the harm in casual sex, and also don't require it for validation. I'm glad FDS is accessible to a new set of younger women who will make wiser choices about their bodies. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/20 07:50 PM |
| 15 | An argument against Fuck BuddiesThere is science behind love, it’s all chemicals. When you start dating someone your brain is flooded with feel good stuff. And then as you date longer, your brain releases another kind of chemical. Part of the reason why it gets increasingly difficult to disentangle yourself from relationships with men who are very obviously not worthy of your love and attention. And everyone can see it. Love truly makes you blind, so do it with someone you trust. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/02/20 07:32 AM |
| 2 | men giving you ''compliments''"Not sure whether I should be glad you won't be letching on me, or worry for that poor woman you've decided to creep on." | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/02/20 07:26 AM |
| 12 | Nayyirah Waheed's poetry speaks directly to my soul."knowing your worth can save your life" So true, in literal and figurative ways. It prevents you from staying in an abusive relationship which could escalate to murder, it also prevents you from wasting your life on someone who doesn't recognise your worth. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/02/20 05:32 PM |
| 34 | "Man" feels entitled to oral sex from GF... Expects her to put out.... Daily reminder to take zero shit from these men!!I don't care how much you eat my pussy, I'm not going to suck your dick more if you do that. Sex isn't a transactional exchange of activities. I insist on oral for myself because I assume you, as my partner, are interested in getting me off. That's my expectation. And you're not going to get me off with your dick. I'm also interested in getting my partner off, which doesn't happen with blowjobs, so yes, I'm not going to focus on an act that is usually unpleasant and uncomfortable for me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/02/20 10:01 AM |
| 27 | You don't have to get over his porn stash. it's good to have your own boundaries! Remember that! I see so many of these posts and they make me lowkey sadUgh. I feel for her. It angers me that women are so conscious of keeping the ego and self esteem of their nasty, ugly LVM intact - while men simply don't give a fuck. Admittedly, the guy I'm seeing used to watch porn (at the very least it was nothing disturbing and degrading) before we met, but has stopped since. I've also sensitised him to the dangers of porn and the harms of the porn industry which he claimed to be unaware of. Recently, I was talking to him about the unrealistic standards of a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/02/20 09:39 AM |
| 10 | I'm enjoying the 90s Pickmeishas, but how about a 00s Queen for inspiration ;)Yes! Omg yes. How do we do this? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/20 11:18 PM |
| 33 | Do not be impressed by money. Money doesn't equal high value.Agreed completely. I don't particularly care for immense wealth, nor do I aspire to be with someone who's loaded (I may actually be extra wary of someone like that because they can be obnoxious, particularly if they were born into money). My requirement is that they are financially stable and doing well enough. I'm okay with dating men who earn less than me as well, especially if they work in a sector that is traditionally low-paying, but meaningful, hard work. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/20 08:23 PM |
| 19 | R/short have banned mentioning this sub on there. Thoughts?That's hilarious. To be honest, I am quite happy with these incel types being isolated from us, because I want nothing to do with them. It's hard enough to weed them away IRL. If they actually want to learn and maybe stop being an incel, they should come by here with an open mind. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/20 08:18 PM |
| 35 | Give up your personal life if you truly love meI was reading about the "pink collaring" of social media work, it was very insightful. Social media is looked down upon as a frivolous, feminine hobby - and consequently, work in the domain generally is paid less (even though it is valid work) - because "you're just working doing what you do as a hobby". Fuck that! I'm terrible at social archiving, and don't post on any social media, but that's just me. I would never think to be disparaging of my friends on social media who create amazing conten… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/20 08:08 PM |
| 11 | This sub makes me want to die a virginI think it's normal to devote a fair amount of time to finding a partner, or wondering about/wanting love. Not only does it speak to human needs and desires, it's also strongly socially conditioned into us - the ideal life is presented to us as a heteronormative coupling - it's shown as the only way of being happy. But once you start investing in other things (and that takes time and effort), once you start focusing on personal goals, it opens up so many options! I'm so glad you're coming to rea… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/20 08:02 PM |
| 14 | These dudes get itNoting this down - I've also dabbled in sex work and would love to hear your insights. I had some thoughts too. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/20 03:32 AM |
| 28 | These dudes get itSame I have weird kinks but I am PERFECTLY happy without them ever being fulfilled in real life. In fact, I actually think some of my kinks I'd rather not have fulfilled... I'm happy to just masturbate about it. Good sex and good chemistry where I actually have orgasms are far better than trying out shit that might be awkward and not work out as well. Plus, why fix something that isn't broken? I know how to get myself off best, let's stick with that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/02/20 03:28 AM |
| 90 | Stop the presses, ladies, this divorced bald man has advice!Men like this make me laugh because I will NEVER want a man like this - yet they expect women to change their behaviours to land the prize that is them. Who would want someone who is so controlling and abusive?! He has just demonstrated that he's scum. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/20 07:44 PM |
| 2 | Certificates and skills which will level you upFirstly, try finding MOOCs that cater to your area of interest and get a certificate in that. It shows drive and passion for a subject (since certification from an online course shows self-drive and discipline, which is always great). Data analysis, research, data science, etc. are all quite important. Creative skills are also great to have - especially writing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/20 07:29 PM |
| 3 | What’s your requirementsI tick a surprisingly large number of boxes here... This is super helpful for my list too, thank you! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/20 07:07 PM |
| 2 | Changing the mindset to be attracted to HVMsFirst off, I don't think all HVM are the same. Please do correct me if I'm wrong, but generally, I think we can accept that people can have very different personalities, and barring certain traits that are essential for being HV, people wildly differ. HVM could be shy and reserved, or loud and outgoing, nerdy or not... You get the point. So try to isolate those essential traits of being HV with personality quirks that make people fun and different! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/20 07:01 PM |
| 11 | A man is only half of what a woman is.Absolutely true. There are a lot of tribes in South Asian countries where, despite the generally accepted idea that women are physically weaker, women do a majority of back-breaking physical labour. And childcare. And domestic work. And they're the only ones who are responsible with money - to the point where government schemes that offer financial assistance to poor, rural households specifically hand the money to the women because LVM mentality is so widespread that men immediately use the mon… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/20 06:54 PM |
| 89 | Yikes, girl.Lol. Everyone knows LVM are ABUNDANT. It's honestly a numbers game sometimes - you just have to keep meeting people and being absolutely vicious in your assessment. So yes, that means meeting more men, but it also ups your chances of finding someone decent. Anyone who calls anyone a "ho" is LV. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/02/20 06:49 PM |
| 13 | Rape jokes and the apologists they bring outta the woodworkHow do people actually believe this?!! How does it happen?!! Sometimes, if the dick slips, it does touch my butthole and there's a laugh and direction to the correct hole, but there's NO WAY it can go in without intention (either on my part or his). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/02/20 07:20 AM |
| 15 | A kind stranger from FDS saved me from r/AgeGapThat subreddit is horrifying. Did you check out the pinned drinking game post where they give a shout out to FDS? Do they hear themselves? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/02/20 06:39 AM |
| 6 | A kind stranger from FDS saved me from r/AgeGapI am SO glad you're here now! You are so young, and dare I say lucky for having found this place so soon. Please don't beat yourself up, please work on yourself and towards letting go of that horrendous person. You have many many years ahead of you, that will be much more authentic and beautiful. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/02/20 06:38 AM |
| 60 | “I don’t love him for his money!” But would HE still love YOU if you were also crusty and old?Excellent question to ask yourself every time you find yourself in this position! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/02/20 06:32 AM |
| 40 | I really LOATHE movies/books that end with the female protagonist giving a chance to the guy she had "friendzoned", just because ONE guy she liked did not treat her right.Yes, these movies are supposedly "for women" but they actually propagate the cultural messaging that benefits men. Every time I see an attractive woman with an unattractive man in a show/movie (recent one that comes to mind is Sex Education), I'm beyond pissed off. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/02/20 06:05 PM |
| 30 | I can believe itLmao girl I'm with you! So here's the thing - oral isn't something I'm reciprocal about. I'll do it if I'm in the mood to do something for him (for like a couple of minutes) but I honestly would prefer not to, because sucking dick is 1. Painful and 2. Nasty. Also, I'm bi, and have been with a lot of women, and I love eating pussy. That's an act I derive pleasure from in and of itself. That's why I think just because a dude wants to go down on me (and of course I'll gladly let him since that will… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/02/20 11:03 AM |
| 6 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered (Feb. 5th 2020)I need as much socialization as I can get. Yep, that's the right approach to take! Socialising is a skill that needs to be honed, so sometimes you have to force yourself to do it. But it can be very rewarding. I'm an introverted homebody myself, but feel very comfortable in social interactions because I forced myself into them - and then faked it till I made it. :) I spend 80% of my time away from work alone, but that makes the 20% I spend with people all the more valuable! I cannot believe this… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/02/20 08:07 AM |
| 10 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered (Feb. 5th 2020)I think it's perfectly valid to say "How about we get coffee instead?" or "I'd rather go out for dinner / try out a new place to eat" when someone offers a drinks date! If you don't want to be explicit about not drinking, another option is to just set the timing for your date to be on the earlier side - "Hey, I'm only free on Saturday afternoon at 4 PM, so let's get coffee then." | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/02/20 07:55 AM |
| 15 | What do you think of ¨Living together apart¨ relationships?This is ideal for sure. Cohabitation would only be something I practise out of desperation. I need a lot of personal space and alone time. It's not just better for the health of my relationship, but also for me to achieve personal goals and indulge in self care. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 09:10 PM |
| 12 | My SIL is a Pickmeisha. How do I save her from my Brother?I have been in a very similar situation. How close are you to your brother? Effort needs to come from both ends. Yes, she needs to see light, but he also needs to see light. I never refrained from shaming my brother for his LVM behaviours. I guess it's a sibling thing to mock each other, lol, but it is effective. I always make it very clear to him how lucky he is to have my SIL, how she's very much out of his league (it's not even a lie), and how he needs to pick up slack when it comes to househ… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 09:08 PM |
| 20 | I'm trying to read The New Rules but sis... The mysogyny...It's not even good advice because there's no one way of dressing for men. What you should do is feel good about yourself while expressing your personal sense of style. You're bound to find someone who finds your uniqueness appealing and attractive. And they'll be attracted to you, for you, without you having to put on some kind of show constantly to appeal to them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 08:53 PM |
| 23 | I'm trying to read The New Rules but sis... The mysogyny...I haven't read that book and now I'm not inclined to either. Your hair must be straight, long and blond, at the very least light. You have to wear "sexy sexy sexy" clothes (only miniskirts or tight jeans according to them!) and heels "as high as you can stand!" Any semblance of facial hair that isn't thin brows, removed. Don't be subtle but don't be slutty either. As you rightly pointed out, this is not only misogynist, but also very racist. I'd urge the moderators to reconsider recommending thi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 08:30 PM |
| 45 | It takes 7 months for men to proposeI just don't think all relationships are the same or follow the same trajectory. Ultimately, as people, we are all different. For me, personally, 7 months would feel like way too soon for someone to propose marriage. Then again, I'm not looking to get married soon so that might be a factor. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 08:26 PM |
| 14 | STDs are sexist, and women are the losers. Here's whyPorn makes boys AND girls think sex without condoms is normal and so much better. Whether a man wears a condom or not makes VERY little difference to me in terms of sensation. I don't get it when someone women say wearing condoms makes sex worse for them (barring latex allergies or something like that, of course) - anatomically, the vagina isn't particularly sensitive to the texture of latex vs skin, and even if you do feel the difference, the actual pleasurable sensation is derived from the thr… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 08:23 PM |
| 27 | If you're a male lurker here, and you're triggered by the content, its because you're the definition of LVM.Yes, I'd definitely say that some facets of FDS could very well coexist with red pill philosophy. However, misogyny is rampant in RP to the point that it's a foundational principle almost. So I'm curious to know which aspects of red pill this guy believes in and which he doesn't, and how that view can coincide with FDS? I can't think of how red pill men are not idiotic and toxic but maybe that's my lack of awareness. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 01:46 PM |
| 19 | HVM vs. LVM responses to breakups and rejectionThis is absolutely brilliant. All of these resonate so strongly with me. I've also had another breed of LVM, they can be worse than actual LVMs, they present as HVM but deal with break ups in the EXACT SAME WAY. My ex constantly pestered me after I broke up with him, demanding I give him a "logical reason" as to why. He tried to make it seem like I was doing a bad thing for myself by breaking up with him over non-issues. All while constantly declaring himself as calm and peaceful and doing the r… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 09:07 AM |
| 45 | Reminder that if you find yourself psychoanalyzing a man, he's manipulating you.Instincts are so incredibly important. Women are often labeled as irrational and overly sensitive so as to make us question our own instincts, and hold back on addressing those concerns of ours. When it feels like something is wrong, it's very likely because something is actually wrong. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 08:56 AM |
| 28 | This thread made me realize why I SUPER need FDS...Ugh, exactly. "Highly sensitive" - I resent this term so much. Sorry we aren't psychopaths. If we treated men the same way they treat us, they would never ever take it the way we do. Men are extremely sensitive and incapable of controlling their emotions. But of course, their way of showing it is anger, aggression and sometimes literally killing us. But nah, they're the logic driven rational creatures! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 06:05 AM |
| 4 | If y’all could live in any decade then what would it be and why?Yep! Pre-colonisation, though, quite a few countries had matriarchal societies, cultures, and tribes. But then the very same Victorian morality permeated into the colonised countries, bringing them way behind in terms of gender equality. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 06:01 AM |
| 10 | If y’all could live in any decade then what would it be and why?Same here! Now, or a future (where FDS is the norm, lol). Before this, things have always just been shit for women and they didn't even have ostensible legal rights to back them up. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 05:59 AM |
| 48 | Men use the term "empowering" to oppress womenMen are the first to stand behind empowerment when it comes to sexuality and showing off your body for their gaze (unsurprisingly silent on actual issues around sexuality such as non consent during sex, women's orgasms, etc.) but don't care at all for basic needs such as education, equal rights, equal wages, etc. Probably because they know women's actual empowerment will likely lead to less women catering to their gaze. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 05:56 AM |
| 8 | Finding the balance between truth vs hope with menIMO, being LV isn't necessarily an unchangeable thing, and assuming it is would be counter productive on our part. Men are just being held to higher standards and more accountability now, and when more of us raise our standards, more men will try to keep up. That's why I firmly believe in making Pickmeishas see the light. Pickmeishas need to change for the greater good, otherwise there will always be an abundance of LVM in circulation. I don't believe that Pickmeishas are our enemies (I mean, ho… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/20 05:21 AM |
| 3 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.Lmao, thank you! I am now convinced that men in academics are generally scum. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/20 08:56 AM |
| 0 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.Omg what did it say?! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/02/20 04:57 AM |
| 2 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.Hahahahaha that's completely warranted! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 05:54 PM |
| 2 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.OH, yes, completely, completely agree with what you're saying about virtue signalling. Celebrating women's work for the sake of it being women's work (as opposed to recognising skill/talent) is a huge red flag and honestly just insulting. I just meant men who have a healthy interest in work by women as well, and who are not completely detached from female artists. That's always been a good sign IMO as opposed to men who are inundated by very masculine cultural products (often these masculine cul… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 05:43 PM |
| 16 | The men of asktrp won’t let “moral responsibility” stop them from spreading disease. Yet another reminder that men dgaf, and will knowingly harm you just to get off. 🙄🤮"I won't get tested so I can say I don't have it with a straight face." What in the world of mental gymnastics is this?!! I'm astounded. I'm honestly not at all about stigmatising STIs (especially because women are both more vulnerable to STIs as receiving partners, and because stigma leads to this attitude of non disclosure) but how on earth does this even make sense?!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 05:36 PM |
| 2 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.Agreed on your points about artists as well! I'm just talking about spaces where I've encountered HVM and it's entirely possible that I've only met the exceptions. But I'd like to know why you think men who celebrate women's work would necessarily be manipulation? What about if they have genuine appreciation for it? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 05:12 PM |
| 5 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.Hahahaha! Only if it goes well. ;) Too many LVM to talk about, let's keep some positivity up! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 04:05 PM |
| 3 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.That's two for volunteering/charity events! Agreed completely that online dating is not worth it. Please do report back on your two new dates! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 04:00 PM |
| 5 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.Wow. Very good take. We all always need to look out for signs of men being low value without assuming that just because they have access to knowledge, they must be woke. As you said, perhaps other academic fields are more conducive to HVM! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 03:34 PM |
| 2 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.Oh yes, this is never to say that these men will always be HVM - in all situations we must assume most men are LVM. But these are just some potential places to look. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 03:29 PM |
| 5 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.Thanks a lot for sharing! These are some good signs to look out for indeed! Very interesting point about hiring more women because they're more capable in a male dominated space. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 03:26 PM |
| 12 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.What a brilliant addition to the list! Completely agreed with all your points! This seems more sure-fire than anything I suggested. Empathy/kindness is such an important trait in a HVM. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 03:24 PM |
| 3 | After the depressing thread on HVM in cities - A general discussion on where to find good HVM.Hey! Sister in academia, lol! Honestly, as I said, and as we must always assume - LVM will ALWAYS be abundant simply by virtue of the fact that it is lower effort to be low value! LVM in academia, as you rightly said, can be especially insidious. Fuelled by the insecurity of having highly accomplished and intelligent women around them, they resort to extreme viciousness. Why I think there are possibly more HVM in academia though, is just because at the very least they are aware of feminist disco… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 03:12 PM |
| 4 | I can’t stop but cringe when I see a man shaming a woman for not being a virginYeah, it's basically what capitalism has nicely packaged as feminism to hand to women so we buy more stuff. But the core values of feminism are so intrinsic to FDS, right? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 01:35 PM |
| 6 | I can’t stop but cringe when I see a man shaming a woman for not being a virginTotally agreed with nearly all you said - but curious as to why you don't consider yourself a feminist? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/20 02:35 AM |
| 7 | Why it seems to men like a lot of women are less interested in sex as a relationship progresses...Oh god, this resonates. When you start seeing his gross habits up close and personal... Makes me wonder if I ever want to live with a man. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/01/20 04:45 AM |
| 3 | Why it seems to men like a lot of women are less interested in sex as a relationship progresses...Exactly the situation I was thinking of. But this is clearly the minority of cases. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/01/20 04:43 AM |
| 13 | Why it seems to men like a lot of women are less interested in sex as a relationship progresses...Nope. Highly unlikely. Just another manipulation tactic to make you feel like you're "sexually broken" if you don't respond like some kind of toy getting wet at the drop of a hat. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/01/20 04:42 AM |
| 14 | Why it seems to men like a lot of women are less interested in sex as a relationship progresses...Lol this is true. I guess I'm talking about the minority of men who are genuinely clueless that they actually suck at sex. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/01/20 08:10 PM |
| 20 | The Power of Female SexualityBrilliantly written and articulated. I agree with everything you've said - once you start being self-centered during sex, your experience has such a positive turn. And orgasms being brilliant for the body as a whole - such a revelation for me as well. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/11/19 05:21 AM |
| 16 | N-count in men, does it matter?This is such a brilliant take! I have also always instinctively had this repulsion towards men who have high counts (especially men who give this information without being asked and brag about it) - you've articulated perfectly why this is the case! But personally, it's not something I would ask about. I'd rather gauge a man's proclivities and behaviour through other things than his number (I've lost count of my own, and I couldn't volunteer that information if asked.) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/11/19 06:30 PM |
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter