TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

Georgist_Muddlehead Archive

View 3 posts and 338 comments by Georgist_Muddlehead on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
4

I wonder if it's more like outwardly and inwardly progressive, but subconsciously conservative.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates03/03/23 02:43 PM
2

And I'm also bothered by this notion that the patriarchy is a myth that I see so often on Reddit. Are the people who say this trying to imply that they have a better grasp and reading of our material reality than Marx and Engels and Lenin, that all very much considered the patriarchy one of the superstructures of capitalism and private property? I'd be curious if you could elaborate on this. I think most disagreements about patriarchy consist of people talking past each other, with different def…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates01/03/23 04:52 PM
1

"Negative feelings—worry, sadness, and anger—have been rising around the world, up by 27 percent from 2010 to 2018." https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/world_happiness_report_finds_that_people_are_feeling_worse
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/22 03:01 AM
1

What are you alluding to by referring to "no debt." The only significant debt for someone earning $1m per year would be a mortgage. And if you earn $1m a year you certainly can buy a very nice apartment or house (I know there are apartments and houses which cost over $100m, but still you can get something very good for $2-5m).
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/22 08:15 PM
3

*Flush yourself
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/22 08:09 PM
7

what would they lose by giving in the protests on this trivial issue? It is often considered to be bad to give in to protesters. The reasoning is if you do what they want - seemingly in response to their demands - it emboldens them and others to make other demands.
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates20/12/22 06:02 PM
3

Does porn actually bring greater sexual relief than masturbation with less explicit sexual imagery?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/22 04:17 PM
1

we are not naturally hungry all the time we are only hungry in response to starvation or mental health I think we also feel hungry depending on taste. We can lose our appetite if we are offered something disgusting to eat. And we can feel a desire to eat (overeat) a lot of certain foods. I think the reasoning is that this was a good survival strategy when we didn't know where our next meal was coming from, but it's not when we can easily buy the food we need tomorrow. Isn't it possible a similar…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/22 04:12 PM
2

It's harder to make a choice if you have lots of options. If you have fewer options, it's easier to make a choice, but maybe it's just as hard to feel satisfied, as you are likely to compare to other people anyway. It's probably harder for all of us to feel satisfied when we have become accustomed to seeing so many attractive people (compare several generations ago).
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/22 03:41 PM
2

Citation please!
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/22 05:24 PM
1

I don't have a good understanding of the technology. As far as you know, is there a lot of development in these technologies specifically for the creation of a very close alternative to sex (whether VR porn, sex robots or whatever), or are these technologies being developed for other purposes as well? One of the things that I'm skeptical about is the high cost and whether there will be enough early adopters. People are usually excited to be early adopters of new technology and the demand helps f…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/22 11:40 PM
1

Arguably it is harder for women because they tend marry earlier means that they have less time, as you say. But you could argue the other way around: it takes men longer BECAUSE it is harder for them. I'm a bit skeptical of the money and effort required to be beautiful. I think a lot of these things are the cherry on top.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/22 11:46 AM
2

I'm a 6ft man from the UK and these studies are close to what I'd expect. I do wonder how much it might vary by country though. Maybe Americans (who I assume are also the dominant demographic on this subreddit) prefer slightly taller.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/22 11:57 PM
3

I think he said something like kids shouldn’t even touch the ground Just don't touch grass, bro!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/22 11:43 PM
1

I thought the same thing. I think it would be better to determine a user's ranking (e.g. like ELO ranking) and display this as a percentage (e.g. man A is in the top 4% of straight men and man B is in the top 71% or whatever). Or alternatively, the incoming swipe ratio (e.g. 20% of women who see his profile swipe right on man A and 0.6% swipe right on man B).
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/22 08:47 PM
1

Current matches is quite a useful statistic. But it depends a lot on how long the member has been active and how often the delete matches. Some who is very attractive might have just joined or deleted matches where there is no ongoing conversation. I think a ranking would probably be better (for example, people could be group into 1% bands or 5% bands - so Man X could be in the top 1% of straight men and Man Y could be in the top 19%. I suppose it would be a bit complicated as it would probably …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/22 08:40 PM
1

Are most of these rejections face to face? I thought the norm was to wait until after the first date to ask for a second (so that you don't put them in an uncomfortable position).
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/22 06:10 PM
1

What's the pint Bitter
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/22 01:01 PM
1

I've been told I'm awkward sometimes and I struggle with determining if a woman is attracted to me. Whilst my experiences sound quite similar to yours, I've been told I'm not autistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/22 12:01 AM
0

There are no big death sentences and small death sentences! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2d4wPaBNryA I think shyness is worse than awkwardness. If a woman is shy and waiting for you to make a move, it might be OK if you are awkward, but if you are also shy and don't even make a move awkwardly, you definitely miss out. The only thing the successful men you refer to definitely have in common is that they did approach. I'm on the autism spectrum and have yet to find a way for me not to appear aw…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/22 11:27 PM
1

Assume physical attractiveness is equally important for men and women. But men are also expected to approach. If there are some less attractive men who are more willing to approach, they will be seen to be more successful than some of the attractive men.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/22 07:38 PM
4

I have found some women got nervous when they were attracted to me. But some other women who weren't attracted to me seemed to display the same nervousness (I think because they thought - usually correctly - that I was attracted to them, and it made them uncomfortable).
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/22 06:16 PM
2

That study sounds intriguing, but I wonder about the context. The abstract says: "opposite-sex heterosexual strangers interacted for 10 to 12 minutes, then self-reported flirting and perceived partner flirting." Were they told beforehand that they would be asked if they thought the stranger flirted? Were they told to flirt if they found the stranger attractive, or were some told to flirt and others not, regardless of whether they found the stranger attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/22 06:07 PM
0

Women want to date up, get the best mate they can, and value looks and status. Women don’t like Simps/ “nice guys:” Women are attracted to masculinity. Leadership. Decisiveness. Security. The ability to get things done. This is like a list of ingredients, but no recipe. Consider a particular man. There is not an objective measure of his looks, status, ability to get things done etc. Women will vary in their estimations of these things and in the relative importance of each of these factors. So w…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/22 05:46 PM
1

I'm having a strange sense of deja-vu!
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/22 12:06 AM
9

Anyone who thinks they are likely to struggle to resist temptation should probably do so. This includes desirable men.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/22 12:05 AM
4

it says a lot about men that they cheat as much as they do despite it being so much harder for them to get casual sex. makes you wonder how many more of them WOULD cheat but can’t because nobody wants them. and out of the men who DO cheat, how many of them had to put a lot of effort and actively pursue the woman they cheated with? Isn't it likely that a fair amount of cheating is with hookers?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 11:46 PM
4

I meant if they think a high proportion of incels are misogynists, they might just assume that any particular incel is a misogynist.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 10:21 PM
2

The issue is that males see sex as a reward and something that all men should be entitled to. In that case, is there any difference between incels and other males?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 08:57 PM
5

I agree and it's problematic. It would be interesting to know what proportion of the men who are involuntarily celibate believe the misogynistic aspects of the incel ideology. I think some people will fear the worst (especially they were perceive their safety to be at risk).
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 08:40 PM
1

I'm not sure being in a big city should make much difference. I see a lot of people assuming the more single people in the area, the better for everybody - e.g. they say if there are 1,000 single young women in a town or 10,000 in a city, the city is better. But if there are ten times as many men in the city, doesn't the extra competition cancel out?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 08:04 PM
1

Over what time period? Relationships seem less transactional than in the days when it was more difficult for single people (especially women) to support themselves. Is the trend reversing a little more recently? I thought they are still not very transactional, but the proportion of people in relationships is falling (so perhaps there is an increase in people viewing relationships transactionally, and that's why some of them are single)
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 01:41 PM
2

I'm inclined to agree it's probably better. But devil's advocate, could it be worse if they don't know - or can't track down - the father, and there isn't enough government child support?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/22 12:30 PM
1

AI would do the same thing with more people
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/22 02:57 PM
1

If a first date doesn't turn into a second date, the most common reason is a lack of physical attraction. I would assume this if it's a blind date. But why would two people be on a date if they weren't physically attracted? I think if you meet on OLD that's a bit closer to a blind date, as you don't know how they will compare to their photos. But is it enough to conclude that physical attraction is more likely to have been the reason than all the other factors (whether you're fun, funny, have an…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/22 01:42 PM
3

"AI controls dating from now on. AI selected your marriage partner." I suppose it's not really clear what controlling dating means. But I imagine it could set dates based on observable factors and then observe how the dates go. That's where the chemistry would come in. It doesn't seem likely it could add anything here though, compared to what humans can already do.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/22 01:27 PM
6

Is there a good method of estimating how common it is to cheat? I doubt it's that common, but can we be sure there aren't a lot of cheaters who don't get caught?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/22 01:12 PM
1

I understand that will be the case for the vast majority in the current dating culture. But when it was common for couples to marry early, with fewer previous sexual partners and sometimes none (I think this was the case in the first half of the 20th century), did it matter that the experience was gained with that partner? Wouldn't the satisfaction be the same once they became satisfied?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/22 12:05 AM
1

"People reported that online dating and blind dates were two of the worst ways to meet a potential partner." It's interesting that respondents to the survey reported that, considering the proportion of people meeting their partner online has grown steadily. Do people over-state how bad it is? Or do people use it, despite how bad it is? (e.g. more people have fewer opportunities to meet, less time, more WFH, small social circles) Or is it a worse way (i.e. so each individual first date is likely …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/22 11:30 PM
6

Point 3: Men being fuckboys is good for men because it allows us to gain sexual experience. We can pump and dump a few easy women or have "practice girlfriends". We can learn what works and what doesn't work via raw experience. And this is beneficial to us because women don't want inexperienced men anyways. Does it matter when the experience was gained? If a man was inexperienced when he first met a woman and gained experience with her, would that be worse than if he became experienced with othe…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/22 10:57 PM
1

Virtually any man who struggles with getting sex and intimacy is actually struggling with his self worth. Do you think this is more a cause or consequence?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/22 10:45 PM
3

Roughly what proportion of people do you think experience love?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/22 10:39 PM
1

So how do you explain all of the people in nine to five jobs who are in love?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/22 10:38 PM
0

why are you angry it’s not just landing on your lap because you played video games most of your life and clocked in and out to your bland nine to five? Most people could achieve various absolute standards (e.g. become more physically attractive by exercising more instead of playing video games) and this does not detract from the attractiveness of other people. But the same cannot be said of jobs. A large proportion of jobs (either a large minority or an outright majority) are bland nine to five.…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/22 09:26 PM
0

It would be a lot easier to come up with estimates of the importance of height, because it can be objectively measured.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/22 01:45 PM
1

Being slow to develop could explain an age gap at younger ages. But age gaps are rarer at younger ages (a lot of boys and girls date the same age or close in school or university). They become a bit more common after university, at the point at which men would have caught up to women.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/22 02:40 AM
2

Big age gaps are rare. Moderate age gaps are common. On average there is a small age gap. So, on average there is something about slightly older men which women like. Maybe the effect of age on physical appearance is equally bad for men and women, but men improve in other ways. Or maybe the effect on appearance isn't so bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/22 01:17 AM
1

I thought it was something like a third. I suppose it varies from country to country.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/22 01:06 AM
0

But coming from a top-tier university where I made acquaintance with a lot of attractive, upper class “prime” women, none of them wanted older men. They were obsessing over the attractive, physically fit boys around their own age. Might that change after they graduate?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/22 11:20 PM
1

Only 100 or 200 years ago, the dating life of a man was completely dependent on his social class. A man had to qualify himself for a woman and her family through his job. A man couldn't typically date up in social class. Within his social class, many other factors were important. In today's day and age, all you need to have is a bachelor or a master's degree, be fun and a woman in your demographic will end up liking you. Probably a large minority of men have a degree. What about the others? I'm …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/22 10:58 PM
5

How important would a wage gap be anyway? In many marriages, the husband earns a lot more than his wife. He is quite likely to earn a higher rate of pay and he is likely to work full-time for most of his life, whereas his wife is likely to do part-time or no work for some years whilst she raises the children. Is there a consumption gap in these marriages? Many things they share (e.g. the house they live in, the spending on their children). When it comes to discretionary spending on each other, d…
/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates09/12/22 05:43 PM
1

He explained "too much height difference" - it can make anything physical awkward
/r/AntiFeminists09/12/22 05:25 PM
2

If it's completely random then the probability of this is probably like winning the lottery. But in some contexts the probability could be a lot lower (e.g. if several of you played on the same basketball team and that's how you became friends). I'm 6ft and I don't think I've ever met someone taller than 6ft 6.
/r/AntiFeminists09/12/22 05:17 PM
1

My point was, women do have varied interests in terms of aesthetics, I just don't think they're catered to that much. We can see this without referring to porn. Get a group of men or women to talk about their "type" or who they think is the hottest actor/musician/sportsperson/celebrity and you will probably see a fair amount of diversity in their answers.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/22 05:49 PM
1

Women want lucky men!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/22 05:35 PM
1

Personally I think we will have short term contracts to create children and raise them to a certain age, after which parents will end marriage. Say a 10-12 year contract. A lot of people seem to like being married beyond 12 years! So even if most marriages were going to fail, it should just be an option. But doesn't no-fault divorce already give that option?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/22 05:05 PM
1

If two people are the same aside from confidence, I might expect the confident one to be more financially successful. But overall I'd think there was quite a weak correlation. Some of the most financially successful people studied at the best colleges and/or studied mathematical or scientific subjects. Do these people tend to be more confident? I think the students at the best colleges would tend to be close but slightly less social than students at average colleges. I think the discrepancy betw…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/22 01:10 AM
2

Maybe confident and emotionally available is a bit like Madonna/mother and the whore. People want both but usually have to choose one.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/22 01:04 AM
3

I was thinking of an example like this too! A man who isn't confident leading up to an exam or his business plan etc., so he works to make it perfect - that should be a plus.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/22 12:55 AM
6

Several of those things (smoker, drinker, kids, degree) tend to have a section where these are listed, so it's probably not important to write. There is definitely no need to put age, as you can control the age range you see. Fit/works out or not can usually be seen from photos. I think it sounds a bit better to describe yourself in a few sentences. If you write something like "I love going on adventures... most recently x" or "and I'm looking forward to y" I think it's implied you'd like someon…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/22 12:48 AM
1

Men don't have that problem until thier 60s. I know a bunch of older guys who just marry a pretty girl knowing she just wants him for his money. He knows he has her for 15 to 20 years then he dies and she will move on to someone else.. Won't those women tend to have the same problem (of loneliness) as the other over 45 year old women?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/22 03:23 PM
1

It probably depends how it comes across. If she thinks he wants a relationship with me, that means he finds me more attractive than a succession of other women. If she thinks he wants a relationship with just any woman, then she might interpret that as having limited options. It probably depends on other factors like age too.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/22 03:19 PM
2

Maybe he said marriage is four children
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/22 09:38 AM
1

Assume men who have few friends are more likely to be bad partners (ranging from less fun to be around to dangerous/abusive). But the majority of them could make good partners. It is rational for women to avoid these men for friendships and relationships. But it would be better for men and women if these men did find it easier to form friendships, in order to be vetted. The problem is that this can't be achieved by individual action, but requires many people to change in order to facilitate this…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 10:03 PM
1

It would be interesting to see this data disaggregated a bit. I wonder if there are a lot of average men only messaging the top 1/3 and receiving very few replies. Or if it's a bit more evenly distributed.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 09:44 PM
1

I think escalation (who, when and how) is a big problem for many. Do you think a lot of men who have friends (sometimes including women, sometimes not) have them despite being socially awkward? Or do you think it can be a different kind of social awkwardness which inhibits them romantically?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 09:29 PM
1

I think I heard about something like that, but I can't remember exactly. It's a bit hard to see it working though. Wouldn't there be a problem of trading favors? Or recommending a friend because you'd feel bad if you didn't.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 08:47 PM
1

I don't know much at all about Tate, but his de-platforming reminds me a bit of Stefan Molyneux. Perhaps there have been others.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 04:40 PM
3

What about a Mr X and Mrs Y? Mr X is 5ft 6 and says he was rejected by several women who are 5ft 7. Mrs Y is 5ft 7 and has brief relationships with several men who are 5ft 6, but she says they ended seemingly because these men were insecure. Mr X and Mrs Y are attracted to each other, but it doesn't work out. Mr X concludes he was rejected again because he is too short and Mrs Y concludes the man felt insecure again. (Height was just an example. It could be some other factor, the man and woman m…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 03:51 PM
1

...??? Are you suggesting that people often generalise from their experiences too soon?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 02:14 PM
2

A lot of people might be providing faithful accounts of their desires and actions and just have different experiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 01:44 PM
2

I can't imagine how fucking sad it would be to spend your whole life in meaningless short term flings with women. That shit gets so old so fast. I think for quite a few of them it seems to get old slowly. A lot of actors settle in the 30s/40s with a woman more than 10 years younger. A lot of musicians have sex with groupies.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 12:45 PM
1

If you are considering who is available (not merely just present) I think being pregnant or looking after young children could explain part of this. If you were interested in men, you'd see a lot of men who were unavailable but you wouldn't know it. When you see a woman who is pregnant or with a young child, it is very likely she is unavailable. So it may just be more obvious that the women are unavailable.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/22 11:55 AM
2

Which do you think tends to be the most important in order for a man to be seen as a provider? 1) Earn as much or more than his partner 2) Earn above a certain threshold, regardless of what his partner earns 3) Earn enough so that the combined household income could support a certain lifestyle Do you think the source of income or wealth matters?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 11:18 PM
1

I think women tend to be less interested in porn and are far less likely to become addicted. This is probably largely because they are less visually stimulated.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 10:46 PM
1

Presumably hair loss becomes less of a factor as you age (I started to experience it in my 20s, and now I'm in my 30s I don't feel so bad about it) as more men your age will be in the same position. Women still go for men older than them and loads of them don't have a full head of hair. If it were a huge deal, wouldn't they go for younger men?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 10:17 PM
2

My theory is that porn became a much more enticing alternative as it became more available (I'd say particularly in the 2000s, with the advent of tube sites towards the end of the decade). I think crucially if someone hasn't had sex, they are likely to become more focused on the visual aspects and so become more reliant on porn. This can also have the unfortunate effect of making them place a higher value on looks (effectively leading them to increase their standards). But they already perceive …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 10:06 PM
1

I read in some articles that the richer a woman become less likely( and harder) is for them to get a husband or even a boyfriend because many men would feel emasculated when his girl is richer than him and pay everything for him. Is there a way of determining whether the reason is more often the woman not feeling attracted or the man being worried she won't be attracted? (Maybe the problem is it depends on the man and the woman, so both men and women who are OK with the women being more successf…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 09:21 PM
1

I don't think it would necessarily be a big deal, but I would be interested to know their thought process. How did I find out?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 08:58 PM
2

If there is on average an age difference of several years, many women in their mid to late 20s will have a boyfriend or husband in his 30s.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 07:33 PM
6

Women forget to change accounts too
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 04:55 PM
1

Hinge, Tinder, Bumble etc. allow us to quite literally select from millions of options. I think OLD mostly gives more options to people who have a lot of options IRL. Are attractive men approaching much less IRL because they have more options on OLD? Most men don't get very many options on OLD. So I think they would be even less likely to be approaching less IRL. I would find it particularly surprising if it's a big factor for men in their mid 20s or younger. I doubt many college age men do well…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/22 04:31 PM
1

I don't know how MMA works. Do the women's fights take place at separate events? It might be the case that with more exposure, people watch more women's basketball. But similarly it might be true that more exposure for a minor sport, like ultimate frisbee, would lead to more viewers for that. Does that mean there should be more exposure for other sports?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/22 06:01 PM
10

dating for men and women is not symmetrical. Women have more options than men when they are young to start with. So it's only logical for a woman to become bitter with age when she loses her magical powers That's an important difference for most men and most women. But the men with few options when they are young might have already become bitter at an earlier age. Does that become a vicious cycle, or do they get over it?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/22 05:39 PM
3

So if you're the type of guy whose main dating struggle isn't I can never land dates but instead none of my dates go anywhere, your failure to build the spark does not reflect on your charisma, social skills, or personality: it means you're not physically attractive enough. Why would she accept the date if she didn't find you physically attractive enough?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/22 03:35 PM
3

What do you think explains this? I've seen some people suggest men who feel this way don't need sex or romantic relationships, they need friends. This comes up a lot on dating threads as well, so it's not just about whether they've never had sex. But then there are always those who point out that they do have friends and fulfilling lives, but still struggle because they don't have sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/22 02:51 PM
1

I'd say that housing is expensive in most areas. You either need to earn quite a lot more than average or need quite a big deposit (usually means help from parents)
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 09:30 PM
2

Yes, and there was strong social pressure to avoid having children before getting married. But I don't think the economic pressures to get married were that strong. A lot of people today say point out correctly that women don't need men for income any these days. But being single is quite expensive (you bear the whole cost of a lot of things you'd share as a couple) and a particular problem in recent years has been the cost of housing. I live in the UK and I think it's worse here than many count…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 08:59 PM
1

Quite a lot of women were spinsters. 100+ years ago the educated ones did jobs like teaching and earned enough to support themselves and the less educated ones were often servants. The issue was that they would struggle to support children, so it was very hard for women if they were pregnant outside of marriage, or if they wanted to leave their husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 08:35 PM
1

Being desirable as a partner encompasses a lot. What do you think changed possibly as recently as late 90s? Is that things like taking on a bigger share of housework and childcare, supporting her career? I agree these things have probably only become important recently (lets say post WWII). But my perception was that there was quite a big improvement in the late twentieth century. I'm not sure when exactly, but I think a lot changed between the 60s and 90s and then stopped improving. A big compl…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 08:27 PM
1

It was a typo and should be women instead of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 08:12 PM
2

The trick is knowing when it's time to move on, to end one chapter, and start another. Set yourself a time table, and stick to it. When it's time to quit playing around with "Mr / Miss Right Now" and start finding "Mr / Miss Right", have the self discipline to do it. Are you under 25 and doing this plan? Or are you older and looking back?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 08:04 PM
1

As women get older, an age gap means she is more likely to be widowed when she is still young.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 07:53 PM
1

People also need responsibility in order to mature. If we were sheltered until we were 25, we would make a lot of poor decisions when we reached 25 (maybe not quite as many) instead.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 07:45 PM
1

I'd say the ideal range for a straight man is a probably bit bigger (speaking personally, it has increased as I have got older, though not by as much) I don't think fertility or beauty change enough throughout 20s to make a significant difference. e.g. Hasn't Di Caprio dated a 25 year old?!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 07:31 PM
2

The OP contends that "bitter old women" have an issue with age gaps. "Where have all the good men gone" is quite often asked by women at the age where gaps in relationships are more common.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 07:22 PM
1

I think I'm not a good judge of leagues generally, so it doesn't surprise me when this has happened to me. There are so many different factors which might make a person attractive or unattractive which vary from person to person. ​ Maybe average or slightly above average guys need to genuinely recalibrate and either give up and focus on ourselves or kinda train ourselves to shoot even lower? Bear in mind that there are examples of the opposite of your story (attractive women dating average men)
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 05:23 PM
1

I think it's rarely one motive. If a thread seems intriguing, I might start reading. Sometimes I might find some interesting responses, but not feel I have anything to add. Other times I do: "I agree with your point, and I've experienced something similar" or "I'm not sure that's as common as you think" or "That behavior could be explained by something else." They then might find what I say persuasive, or they may elaborate and persuade me. Or if neither of us changes our view, it may be useful …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 03:43 PM
1

I think we can see from literature that men had to do some things to appeal to women in at least some cases. Consider 19th century novels like Pride and Prejudice. Also the kama sutra is a very old guide on how to pleasure women (I don't know if they needed that to attract them, keep them, or they just wanted to give them pleasure). Even if there was a time when all women had to be married, men would benefit from being desirable, as this might enable them to marry a more desirable woman. A compl…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 03:28 PM
1

I agree, at every age there are men and women who will date people of their age. If there are a minority who also date younger or older though, it does give some people fewer options and others more options though.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 03:11 PM
1

Sorry, I didn't mean you said that. I meant the comment of mine which you responded to was a response to that.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 02:08 PM
1

I was responding to this: "Why would an older woman want to date a man who has his eyes on dating a woman much younger than him?" That's where I got age gaps from. I think one problem with this discussion is that it isn't clear what age gaps people are referring to. From the OP (older women being bitter), I assumed he was referring to 35 year old men dating 30 year old women.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 01:50 PM
1

Does that argument apply to other big differences? For example if a very rich or a very well educated person marries someone who is below average in income of education. Or if they were a lot older (20s or even 30s) but still living with their parents. I realize some people would raise these as issues suggesting possible incompatibility, but I think people would be less likely to do so because they are less visible: A man walks down the street with a much younger woman and people label him a cre…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 01:37 PM
5

Is your argument that all age gaps are predatory? I don't know how you got that from my comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 01:29 PM
1

It's quite a leap from an age gap relationship to go after young women exclusively
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 01:18 PM
9

I think one bad thing about this would be that she would probably outlive him by several decades. But I would assume she realizes this and found other factors to outweigh this disadvantage, so I wouldn't feel it my place to point this out or try to dissuade her.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 01:14 PM
1

I tried to make a poll about this, but I don't think it's been approved yet https://www.reddit.com/r/polls/comments/zaljdy/do_you_believe_in_the_red_pill_in_the_context_of/ I'm not sure a high proportion of people believe this stuff
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 01:02 PM
0

I wasn't making a claim about morality.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 12:40 PM
6

Why would an older woman want to date a man who has his eyes on dating a woman much younger than him? I don't think they necessarily do. It's more likely they want to change the culture. Surely this applies to any element of patriarchy/misogyny. A 35 year old woman in the West doesn't want a 35 year old man who watches "barely legal" porn and a 35 year old woman in Afghanistan doesn't want a 35 year old man who wants a teenage bride. They want society to change so that in future,35 year old men …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 12:28 PM
0

One difference between older women steering young women away from hard drugs and dating older men is that older women would typically like to have the option of sex or a relationship with men their age. If men their age had fewer options to date younger women then they would have more options. So I think the intent of these messages might depend a bit who depending on who these warnings are coming from.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 12:11 PM
1

I'd like to bring your attention to an interesting study here that explores human brain development differences between genders. It suggests that women tend to mature faster than men in the early ages, Is this likely to be a significant factor? I think saying "women mature faster" is considered to be a politer alternative to saying "women's fertility declines faster, women lose their beauty faster." If women preferred older men because they were more mature, wouldn't they tend to go for the more…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 11:56 AM
-7

That's interesting, because I've heard women arguing the other way round, that age gaps are more OK when you're younger. 18 and 35 is OK, because he's still attractive. But when you're 30, he'll be 47! And it just gets worse - you'll be middle aged and he'll be elderly...
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 11:40 AM
9

Aren't redpillers more likely to go outside and blackpillers more likely to be terminally online?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 11:18 AM
1

That's very interesting, but I'm not sure how easily it transfers from speed dating to OLD. Would top X selection in OLD imply that a woman would keep a fixed number of matches. For example, get 10 matches, stop swiping, go on a date and decided against a second date, swipe again until there is another match. Even if she stops swiping, she can still get matches from when she swiped first. In practice, I think the vast majority of women just keep swiping. Maybe this is consistent with top X (mayb…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 12:54 AM
1

On average, there is an age gap with men being a few years older than women. This means it takes men longer to find a partner. So perhaps this means it's harder for men to find a partner. Are romantic relationships just hard in general? Do homosexual couples find it any easier?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 12:01 AM
1

Evidence of the anecdote is required to disprove a universal statement though.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 11:47 PM
2

I don't think it's really clear if he means by not supporting feminism that he doesn't support rights for women. He might mean that, but he might mean he is skeptical of things like the desirability of attempts to approach equal gender ratios in jobs.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 08:54 PM
5

71% of conservative women think cheating is always wrong, compared to 36% of liberal women. That's interesting, but I'm not sure how much we can infer from this. Maybe conservatives are more hypocritical. Maybe people in general don't decide to cheat or not based on whether they think it's right or wrong. It would be interesting to find out under what circumstances they think it isn't wrong. Could it be something like if you cheat it's OK for her to cheat? Bear in mind also that if you disagree …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 08:29 PM
1

Oh this is true all I was saying is that a small proportion of the biggest demographic will always be more than a large proportion of a tiny minority. Basically a "1% of white americans is more people than 100% of Native Americans" kinda deal. You have changed one of my perceptions: I always thought one way which relationships were harder for attractive people was that they would have more temptation to have affairs. But if you're right, it's actually less likely, because they are less likely to…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 08:18 PM
1

I get this but it ignores that all these people insta-swiping "the hot person" are not in the hot person's league. You're basically saying "they would have an easy time dating down." Yes I could get an LTR with a 5, but like, I just don't want that lol. That wasn't what I meant. I meant an average person is mostly swiping on hot people, so they are swiping on a small proportion of average people. This works both ways around. If I'm an average man, swiping on 1 in 10 average women and 1 in 10 ave…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 07:10 PM
1

About "is 1% that diff from 5%"--depends on the 1%er. A "hot 1%er" would be someone like deep within the top 1% and yes too good for someone who's just "regular everyday hot" (what you are at 5%). But in general I think people would notice someone in the top 5% and top 1% dating and think it was a mismatch. But a small one. If that were true, a lot of really hot people would be unable to date until they moved to a city, as there just wouldn't be enough people hot enough. I think there were somet…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 05:32 PM
2

A 1 in 100 person would probably be even rarer, because you would probably see a lot of people out of your age range. But I think tastes vary enough that someone is top 1% might not be your type and you might be attracted to someone who is only top 5% in the opinion of other people. Also is the general difference between top 1% and top 5% really that big? I think they could probably be grouped. I think it would still be easier for these people, because there is presumably a higher probability of…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 04:24 PM
2

That's an interesting comparison, but I think the actual things men should worry about may be a bit different. Can she (or does she) develop attraction quickly? And is she likely to cheat if she has the opportunity? Maybe you could be one of the 500 men, but it took a while to develop attraction and a bond, which makes you one in 1000. Maybe (hopefully) she would also override impulses to cheat on you.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 04:02 PM
0

I'm never right, I'm left
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 02:45 PM
2

I think if you are referring to things which are difficult to observe, measure and quantify (which many of the important factors in gender, sex, dating and relationship issues are) then people might be a bit skeptical of attempts to generalize about sex and gender. Instead they might give more weight to their personal experience. But they might not see themselves and interpret their experiences the same way others do and they might not be very representative.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 02:45 PM
1

Does anything matter about a dick other than absolute size and shape? I think most other body parts are preferred to be in proportion (i.e. ratios matter as well as absolute size)
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 01:45 PM
2

I'm 6ft and for me the ideal range is probably around 5'5 to 5'9. Close to 5ft seems too short for me (I don't know how many men share this opinion though), but I think it would be less usual for a 5ft woman to consider a 6ft man too tall. Women seem to place more importance on height and prefer a bigger height difference (there was a study which concluded men were most satisfied when their partner was 3 inches shorter and women were most satisfied when their partner was 8-9 inches shorter). I t…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 10:50 AM
6

Jokes on you the majority of the most attractive women in the world are from western countries. Isn't that putting down the non-Western women?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/22 10:29 AM
2

I was just giving the example of absolute numbers though. Imagine there are 600 girls and 400 boys. If she is attracted to 1/200, that's still just 2. I think most people will think that's really low when they consider their school or college. Maybe expectations of behaviour grow, but expectations of physical attractiveness don't?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/22 05:35 PM
3

I think for most people it's a bit higher than this. Imagine there are 400 high school girls and 400 high school boys. Is it that likely that a girl only found 2 of them attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/22 04:30 PM
2

If it's the latter, then there's other studies showing that people tend to be in relationships with people who are equally as attractive. Is that equally attractive (overall), or equally physically attractive? I would think the former would be more likely, as people often want different things. Isn't this particularly true of men and women, with men placing a higher importance on youth/beauty and women placing more importance on other characteristics? So we might observe that men are more often …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/22 04:22 PM
2

I [20f] only find myself attracted to 1/200 men I see or even less What age range? It's quite different if this is 200 men the same age as you (e.g. in a lecture if you're in college), the age range you want to date (e.g. could be around 18-25 or something) or men of all ages. Are the men you like mostly a certain "type" or are they just very attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/22 04:06 PM
1

This sounds plausible to me. But reading the comments suggests you and I are in the minority on this.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/22 01:26 PM
1

Love and affection- women generally are more fluid and wouldn't mind dating other women. That's an interesting claim. Is there any data on whether bisexual people (men or women) have a preference and whether they tend to have more success? And are lesbian couples more successful than women in heterosexual relationships?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/22 01:09 PM
1

Interesting. I thought you were going to say you preferred taller because they made you feel safer, as they could better protect you.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/22 04:52 PM
1

I hadn't heard of snow bunnies before. Does this strictly refer to winter sports, or is it just an example of a more general type? (like how a soccer mom and a hockey mom are the same, would a beach bunny be grouped with a snow bunny?)
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/22 03:18 PM
1

I wouldn't have thought height was particularly important until I heard about CEOs being taller than average. So I'm not sure how important it is, or why. I wonder if height is more important to climbing an existing corporate ladder than starting a new company.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/22 02:48 PM
2

CEOs do tend to be taller than average though. The average Fortune 500 CEO is 6ft. World leaders are probably of more variable genetic background, so we would have to be careful when comparing them.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/22 02:29 PM
2

The examples given are extreme (men in the top few percent of income being appealing to very attractive younger women). But don't the same factors apply with less extreme cases? Don't men still earn a little more than women on average? Also, in relationships men tend to be a little older, so that is likely to exacerbate differences in income and wealth. Isn't income and wealth a bit like height in this way?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/22 01:40 PM
2

How strong is the tendency to become more confident and have stronger boundaries with age? Even if strong, presumably there are a lot who already have this when young and a lot who lack them despite being older. If men could identify the older women who were compliant, would they prefer them to younger women?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/22 12:55 PM
1

How about lesbians? Maybe some don't need game, but some do? Or all of them require a bit?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/22 10:45 PM
1

I've often wondered about this. I'm a straight man and I don't have any female relatives who are remotely close to my age. I did assume there is probably some mechanism (not necessarily genetic though) which stops attraction, but I have no experience of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/22 12:14 PM
1

After posting a question on reddit it turned out that the vast majority of women would want a threesome with another man if their partner was okay with it. Do you have a link to that? Gangbang, spitroast, double penetration porn is extremely popular with women And a link to some evidence for this?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/22 11:21 AM
3

I suppose it depends how long is spent on those jobs. Cooking is a daily job which takes quite a lot of time and cleaning can be quite a big job as well. Most of the ones you mentioned are bigger jobs but done much less frequently (obviously this depends on the type of property, yard, car etc.). I'm not sure I know anyone who did their own plumbing though. Related to that, I've heard that young men are less likely to have traditional male/DIY skills. I don't know if that's true, but if it is, an…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 04:58 PM
1

You were asking what could/should we do to change "this". This implies that there is an objective problem that needs changing. Of course, the question is, what do you mean by "this". Yes, but the person I was responding to didn't dispute that. I wasn't dodging their question. You are observing that there is a general problem according to the subjective perception of "people". Then you ask the question what could/should be done to change "this". Your question implies that the problem is real/obje…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 04:49 PM
1

I think women did less housework in the 1990s than in the 1950s. Do you think this is incorrect?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 04:22 PM
1

the entire point of slot machines is to win money, and they're advertised as such. The entire point of slot machines is that customers lose money on them. Everyone knows this, yet some people use them anyway. If you know that some people do this, can't you comprehend that some people might take their dick out even if they don't expect it to "work?" This has nothing to do with inappropriate behavior that people are taught not to do as toddlers. I don't think most people are told not to do this, b…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 04:18 PM
1

How is me pointing out that I didn't say it needed to change dodging the question? You are suggesting that, according to the subjective perception of "people", there is a general problem No. I am observing that some people claim there is a problem. but that doesn't necessarily mean that there is an objective problem that is generally applicable to the relationship dynamics between genders. That is true. But that's a different point. The previous poster about why "it" needs to change and you disp…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 03:48 PM
1

I only responded using the slot machine analogy because someone else mentioned it. The point is just people can believe something works and if they don't have perfect information of everyone else who has a 100% failure rate doing the same thing, the 100% failure won't stop them trying and failing the same way. Elon Musk used to be 13, but he is still autistic. I'm not sure if "(?)" means you're skeptical that being a billionaire means he's smart (if so, I agree). But that probably has no bearing…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 03:38 PM
2

That is not relevant to my response to the question I was asked.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 03:30 PM
1

Which claim are you referring to? Do you doubt there has been any change in who does housework in the last 75 years? If you think there has been some change, what do you base this on? (Where does your knowledge of it come from?)
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 03:03 PM
6

Couldn't one of them just slap someone at an awards ceremony?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 02:52 PM
1

According to surveys recording the impressions of women. ​ What surveys, and how did you decide that they justified a grand generalization? Are you saying that you know enough about these studies to generalize that they asked women only, or you don't?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 02:50 PM
2

It doesn't need to change. It is something that a lot of people think should change.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 02:42 PM
2

I'd be really interested to see if parents behave differently depending on whether all their children are the same sex. Can a girl tell if she is treated differently to her brother and vice versa? Could either parent or anyone else notice?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 02:38 PM
1

Are the surveys only of women? I assume they compared the responses of men and women. I'm not sure the responses are reliable. But the same goes for surveys of sexual behavior (number of partners etc.), surveys reporting men stay at work longer (particularly in white collar jobs where hours are not typically tracked - I think people accept the self-reported claims that men work longer hours. I do, but I wouldn't be surprised if they weren't 100% accurate).
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 02:34 PM
6

I think there are several reasons. Companionship, love, sex and desire to have children. Having a partner is probably more about making a life more meaningful than easier or less stressful. I see the argument you made fairly often (also a variation of this argument is made by women) and that's presumably the right approach for some people. But I'm asking about housework in relationships in which both partners work.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 01:49 PM
1

What do you think could or should be done to change this?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 01:41 PM
2

https://www.ucl.ac.uk/epidemiology-health-care/news/2019/nov/women-still-doing-most-housework-despite-earning-more
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 01:40 PM
2

The changes in the workplace, education and political representation are clear. There are numerous statistics showing gradual moves to equality. These changes are both caused by, and in turn cause, changing attitudes. There is less data on housework. It's harder to measure and it's not something which is constantly tracked (like wages), or something which anyone can see (like number of men and women who hold high political office). So maybe it is continuing to change more than I realize. Do you …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 12:32 PM
2

That sounds like a plausible explanation for those who don't live together before marriage, but aren't they in a minority?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 12:09 PM
5

The 1950s stereotype is a fiction propagated by television. It was never a common reality. The fact is that the majority of married women worked in addition to keeping house. I didn't say women didn't work in the 1950s. I said they were expected to do the housework.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 11:58 AM
2

Perhaps the question we should be asking is a little different. If millions of people have played slot machines once or twice and not won, but wrongly assume that somebody has won, would people still play slot machines?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/22 08:58 AM
1

My point is that we don't see most standards, so we don't know what they are or whether they are realistic. Some are specified and quantified, like height. If a woman specifies a height, I know if I meet this requirement. Some are characteristics, like "confident, adventurous, spontaneous, funny." Maybe I perceive myself as some of these things, but a woman has a different perception. Unless she says "I don't want to go out with you again, because you're not confident" I don't know if I didn't m…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 04:11 PM
1

Which kind of standards? Clearly defined and specified standards (e.g. must be a certain height, or have a certain income) - these might be "too high" because only a small proportion of men have them. Stated requirements, but not measurable. Must be "confident, kind, funny" etc. (reasonable requirements in a partner, but what proportion of men are deemed by them to have these characteristics?) - it's possible that the same thing occurs here, but complicated by the fact that these are subjective
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 03:07 PM
4

Aren't most people likely to have a fairly good idea of average from real life? From school, college, often work, from big public spaces and events. I suppose it's more difficult for people who are less social. But I think they can still draw on past experiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/22 02:21 PM
1

I think a big factor would be the experience of approaching and having not-good sex. Does the man quickly approach and get a rejection? He could approach many each day in that case. Or does it require a lot of laying groundwork? (Spends longer talking to still get rejected, but maybe had fun in the process?) How is the experience for the woman? Is she going on nice dates with these men? Having enjoyable experiences which he is paying for, or is she paying too?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/22 03:06 AM
1

I think women probably have less quality sex than men. But I don't think it follows that they have less access to quality sex. They just have to do one of two things. Make the right demands (when a woman didn't have an orgasm, how likely is it she told her partner to make her cum first?). Choose the right partners (men who are good in bed).
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/22 02:52 AM
3

How did your grandmother and great-great grandmother look in photos?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/22 02:25 AM
1

Do you have any arguments for those positions? I'm not asserting what you wrote was wrong or what you quoted was wrong, but they appear to just be assertions. For example, you wrote "the available evidence shows" but you didn't reference any evidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/22 02:19 AM
4

I never really understood the focus on big anything. I'm more of an arse/leg man, but it's all about proportion. Is women wanting a big arse a bit like men wanting massive arms? I wonder if it's something to focus on, which might or might not make them more attractive, but can also be a distraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 07:09 PM
5

The reason is that people perceive it will make them more attractive. But that doesn't explain how they came to hold that belief. I don't know how many people are having plastic surgery which enhances their appearance and isn't obvious. But there are a lot of people who have plastic surgery which makes them look freakish. Perhaps some of these people had body dysphoria (they couldn't see that they have an attractive body, so they have breast implants which are much too big, for example).
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 06:44 PM
3

I don't doubt that cultural trends have an influence. My first question was "How much?" My second question was about how it influences our preferences. I'm not very familiar with BTS. Did they modify their appearance to appeal to a global audience? Or do Westerners find Koreans more attractive as a result of the popularity of BTS? Or both or neither?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 06:35 PM
2

Thanks for your interesting comments. Pretty much all cultures see a multitude of white faces even though white people are a minority globally. In media, white people are usually portrayed as heroes and desirable. I can see that if people all over the world are watching mostly US TV and films, with mostly white actors and actresses, mostly white models etc. then that can be a factor in their preference formation. Does being portrayed as a hero affect whether someone is perceived as attractive th…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 06:29 PM
2

but basically, a lot of it is people went from liking exeggrated features of their race to either more moderate features or borderline mixed/racially ambigou faces This seems consistent with the erosion of cultural influences (at least with regard to ethnic differences)
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 05:53 PM
1

I asked the questions because I'm interested. "Fashion trends history" is at best tangentially related to the question I asked. Have you actually read anything which you think is related to the questions I asked?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 05:48 PM
1

Nobody is asking you to pursue it. You said all the answers are there already, and mentioned some smart people had written about it. So I'm just asking you for some details about what you read.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 05:40 PM
1

Which terms did you google? Which books which you alluded to did buy from Amazon?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 05:33 PM
2

People used to bathe once a week, usually before church - that was just normal. So you wouldn’t dislike someone (unless you were upper class where there was a different norm) for only bathing once a week. Whereas now, if you don’t shower regularly (which is the norm) it’s a different story. I think that would probably be considered a universal improvement though. Obviously nobody can time travel to test this, but if you were accustomed to everyone you knew bathing weekly, it seems unlikely you w…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 05:29 PM
2

Yes, I think that's more likely. e.g. I like x. Maybe if I were born in a different era, I wouldn't have liked x. But then I would disagree that it could help to overcome those cultural influences.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 05:16 PM
3

It was definitely true that people envied them, but do you think they considered them sexually attractive, or do you think they just envied their social position? I don't think it's true that people still envy aristocratic traits and consider them attractive (perhaps they have been replaced as celebrities, though this is complicated, because a lot of celebrities attained their position because of their beauty).
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 05:11 PM
2

What about fairly rapid changes? (i.e. within a few decades)
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 04:58 PM
3

But I don't think it explains why becoming tanned became desirable. Because you can get a tan by sunbathing in an exclusive resort, or by a working on a construction site, or by being on welfare and sitting in the sun. Is having a tan something which is naturally flattering and has no social explanation?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 04:57 PM
2

Please could you suggest the authors or works you would recommend?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 04:48 PM
2

Don't you think it's possible that you might like something which is pushed? (As I said, if you were born in a different era your tastes might have been suited to this era - do you think there is any way of distinguishing where your preferences came from, and if so, how?) Do you think anyone does this - or could - with regard to their own attractions? (i.e. "I thought I was attracted to thin, big breasts, shaved, six pack, etc." but then I realized it was only pushed on, and with that realizatio…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 04:45 PM
3

But why did that change?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 04:36 PM
2

What impact does globalization have? Is that making beauty more uniform, or making people aware of more types? If one type (or a few types) are being emulated (e.g. I've heard Chinese people try to make themselves look "Western"), how do we know if that is cultural, or if that is just what people have a preference for, and they choose it when given the opportunity?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 04:32 PM
2

But how would you know which are the cultural influences? How do you know that something you find attractive today which is more in line with today's beauty standard wasn't influenced by the culture? It could be the case that if you were born decades earlier, you find it equally attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 04:24 PM
2

Do you think knowledge of this is any help in overcoming these cultural influences?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 04:11 PM
2

I have little interest in it Has that always been the case? Recorded history demonstrates things changing, but not what the causes of those changes were.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 04:07 PM
5

Is that the case in most of Africa? I remember hearing about one country in particular (Mali? Mauritania?) where women would be considered desirable if they were fat.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 03:49 PM
2

I think it might be a combination. In a country where starvation has been a big concern quite recently, being overweight can be seen as a positive (e.g. maybe this could be a factor in a country which many people have starved). By contrast, in a country where obesity is a big health factor (e.g. the US or the UK), being thin could be seen as more attractive. There are probably a lot of counter-examples though.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 03:47 PM
5

I don't think the universal features of facial beauty are things that are changing. But things like different ethnicities, body shapes, sizes, hair styles.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 03:32 PM
2

Has that always been the case?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 03:30 PM
3

I'd heard this mentioned particularly about India (from when it was part of the British Empire). How does it happen though? In the 19th century, pale skin was considered desirable, as it showed you didn't have to spend all day working in the sun. Now, tanned skin is considered desirable. What do you think explains this?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 03:18 PM
5

Do you mean more ass in music videos?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 02:49 PM
3

I've heard of that book https://www.amazon.com/Playboy-Centerfolds-1953-2016-Dave-Hickey/dp/1452161038/ref=sr_1_3?keywords=playboy+centrefold+collection&qid=1652798135&s=books&sprefix=playboy+ce%2Cstripbooks%2C369&sr=1-3 It should be easier for our tastes to affect culture now, as it's easier to see what people like in the age of the internet. In the 20th century, a small number of people (in newspapers, magazines, TV stations, book publishers, record labels, film studios, etc.) decided what to …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 02:41 PM
3

What do you think caused that change? I thought part of it was a move away from big boobs (especially fake boobs), maybe for a couple of reasons. As image quality improved, the fakeness became more obvious and less attractive. The growth of the Internet made it easier to see what men really liked. But I'm not sure that explanation is consistent with the growth of fake asses!
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 02:29 PM
5

Interesting! I was also thinking of the example of female hair removal. My understanding is that the trend to removing pubic hair happened mostly due to the influence of porn. I saw a statistic that 84% of women groom their pubic hair regularly, whilst only 50% of men do. Also, women are more likely than men to remove all of it. Is that difference because men watch more porn, so they are more influenced by what they see? Or do women just put more effort into their appearance? (Do men and women h…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/22 02:14 PM
1

I can manage it although I can't speak on behalf of other men. They don't know that beforehand though. ​ The safety argument is weird. They feel less safe with the massive aggressive looking meathead than the skinny runt. This is why I note it's the perception of risk, and it varies from woman to woman. I'm not sure it makes much difference if the man is a skinny runt (he's still probably able to over-power a woman)
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 07:35 PM
1

You wrote one night of passion. Is that something most men can manage? I think women often don't orgasm in sex outside of relationships. So that's a major factor. Also the perception of risk. These two things will vary from woman to woman. But I would have thought they would be bigger issues than reputation.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 04:54 PM
1

Can someone describe this to me? I honestly don't think I ever experienced this in my life. I'm almost positive it's just total bullshit but hopefully someone can convince me otherwise I don't think the urge can be explained to someone who hasn't experienced it. But I think you should be able to understand it's not bullshit.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 04:34 PM
1

6ft 145-150lbs. When I was at school and university I used to think I was probably below average attractiveness. But I've got dates fairly easily on OLD, which makes me think I might actually be slightly above average. But they rarely wanted a 2nd date, so I think my difficulties are more to do with being social, fun, funny, confident, etc. I can only say a handful were definitely sexually interested in me. There were quite a few others who were interested in me, but because the feeling wasn't m…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/22 04:19 PM
1

I don't know, as I don't know what the women who post on these forums are actually like. Maybe they are representative or maybe they aren't. Maybe it would vary and would depend on the guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 09:44 PM
1

The majority of men who aren't in the big and strong minority and they have been having children in mostly monogamous marriages for hundreds of years.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 09:30 PM
1

Not all men who passed on their genes were big and strong, because in most societies monogamy has been encouraged and most people were married. So even if it were true that most women were most attracted to a small minority of the biggest and strongest men, it wouldn't mean these men would father a hugely disproportionate number of children (they might have more children, because there was probably some adultery, and perhaps their children were more likely to survive, due to better genes, but no…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 09:03 PM
1

Something like 40% would be a large minority. I think the number of men who have passed on their genes is thought to be a little higher than this (presumably it's quite speculative though - who really knows what our ancestors sex lives were like?) I'm not sure what you mean by generalization applying to women. How is that relevant? I just pointed out that for hundreds of years, men and women have typically married and tended to be monogamous, thereby limited sexual selection. That's a generaliza…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 08:19 PM
3

I think if we asked feminists, they would say they are concerned about misogynistic attitudes of incels. But then why don't they say "found the misogynist" instead? I think it's not necessarily that they think men are losers if they struggle with women. But they think that men think that and so it's an insult that really hurts.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 07:44 PM
1

Sexual selection was limited by marriage. So most men, or at least a large minority, of men passed on their genes.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 07:32 PM
2

What does can't get laid in a casual sense mean? And why does it mean he shouldn't attempt to be in a relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 07:27 PM
7

That's a fair point, but exaggerated. If they all wanted exactly the same, a rejection by one woman would imply that every other woman would also reject! It would be interesting to consider how close to the truth it is though. Is it more true of women than men? I think women have higher standards, but I remember hearing it suggested that women are more likely than men to have a "type."
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 06:49 PM
1

Do you think women who complain about men who use them for sex are lying?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 08:58 PM
7

I'm not sure what the solution to these men's problems are or if there is one, aside from forcing yourself to stop doing the things you enjoy, to do something you won't enjoy, just to be around people who might like you. I think the trouble is that enjoyment, or the lack of enjoyment, creates a positive feedback loop. If you haven't had good experiences socially, that is likely to come across, making it more difficult to enjoy yourself, and consequently it's more difficult to be a person that ot…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 05:54 PM
2

Beards can't be feminine. I think there is an idea that they are quite popular with boyish men who are over-compensating though (I can't remember where I heard that unfortunately).
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 12:47 PM
2

Isn't the main difference that of different standards for causal sex? Women have high standards and men have low standards, because of the respective availability for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/22 12:28 PM
18

"You don't need a job. You shouldn't rely on a boss to make you happy."
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 10:48 PM
1

I thought highly educated women were supposed to have more partners. Possibly more Liberal, settling down later, having children later or not at all, less likely to place restrictions on sex due to religion...
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 10:34 PM
4

I agree it makes no difference to them. I think a small proportion of men (those who believe they have no chance of having sex) might prefer if more men and women also had little or no sex. I recall hearing allegations that incels felt this way during covid-19 restrictions.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 07:59 PM
2

I think RMV is relationship market value. They are probably saying men will want to have sex with you if you are sexy and virginity is irrelevant.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/22 05:06 PM
0

There are probably are fair number of women under 25 in relationships with men over 25. Are men more likely to cheat or have relationships which overlap?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 10:33 PM
1

By 2010, only 5% of brides are virgins ( too religious, or maybe frigid) 50% of women have had sex with at least 4 different men and many more. Super promiscous women were 18% or one fifth of the population of brides. Thus many more men were being sexually served by a small fraction of the 304 females. Where does 304 come from?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 10:11 PM
1

Sex outside of marriage is legal and widely accepted
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 10:04 PM
1

I would definitely expect that to be a causal factor. I don't have data on how many relationships have an age difference though. And also, whether age differences are fairly typical at young ages (college and even younger), or whether women only start liking older men who they are mid 20s or older. Are roughly equal numbers of boys and girls having sex and relationships in college and then more boys than girls going through dry spells as women (post-college) on average start going for men severa…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 10:01 PM
3

Not knowing if there is a solution is not the same things as knowing there isn't a solution. Understanding if there is a problem, and having a better understanding of it, can only be a good thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 06:04 PM
2

We should be able to discuss whether a problem exists without knowing what the solution is.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 05:37 PM
8

We don't know who actually wants casual sex and who wants relationships. A lot of people say they want a relationship, but just have sex. Maybe they did want a relationship, but the sex was bad, or maybe they lied about wanting a relationship just to get sex - I don't see how we can know. But there seem to be more men who don't have sex or relationships (again, it's difficult to know how many would like casual sex and how many would like relationships) and more women who have sex, but not the re…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 05:01 PM
5

Obviously nobody should be pity fucking. But, understood correctly, I think this is a problem for some women as well as some men: I think statistics generally suggest a higher proportion of men than women are having no sex or relationships recently or are virgins. For example, in 2018 amongst people aged 18-30, 28% of men reported no sex for a year compared to 18% of women (I don't know if this is the most useful statistic, but I think it can be used to illustrate some points about dating): 1) S…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 04:52 PM
12

What is the biggest problem with being asocial? 1) Not meeting women (I.e. a woman might go out with an asocial man, but she doesn't have the opportunity) 2) Woman are concerned if they find out you aren't social (because they think either you don't want friends, or you aren't appealing enough to make and maintain friendships - you failed preselection) 3) You aren't appealing enough to make friends (the underlying reason for this is why women don't like you, rather than being asocial) 4) Being a…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 01:30 PM
0

I don't think anyone has told me to suck it up either. But I wonder the same thing when some women say they are socialized to put men's needs first etc. Men and women probably are treated differently in various ways, without it necessarily being done consciously. A lot of us probably do get the message somehow that we ought to suck it up.
/r/MensRights05/05/22 09:22 PM
2

At a glance the article seems OK. I'm not sure it's worth covering though.
/r/MensRights05/05/22 08:49 PM
1

Interesting! But I don't think that's necessarily correct. Unless triple 6 men are taken at a higher rate, the fact that some are taken isn't relevant to the proportion of single men who are triple 6. They may be more likely to be taken because they are desirable, or less likely because they prefer the benefits of being single.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 08:03 PM
1

Why do you assume it's a small number of women though?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 03:22 PM
1

I didn't say it was a problem. I'm explaining the reasoning behind thinking it causes problems. People can settle down later. But there are limits on when they can have children. Some women can't have children because they settled down late. Do you agree that that is a problem for those women?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 03:06 PM
1

I didn't say women are at fault. Your last sentence makes me think you misunderstood the question. It wasn't rhetorical. It was a genuine question. I don't think the answer is known. What evidence do you think there is?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 02:58 PM
1

Aren't women supposed to be more attractive at that age?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 01:39 PM
1

What ages were they?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 01:25 PM
1

Very rare, but perhaps not quite 1/200, depending on whether they are completely independent. I think taller people are more successful, so probably likely to earn more.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 01:23 PM
0

I don't think there are misandrist or misogynistic laws. But there are some which seem to different impacts on men and women, which sometimes appears to be unjust. Maybe the OP was thinking of divorce, alimony, child support? I think similarly regarding the treatment of men and women. Better in some ways, worse in others. Regarding hypergamy, doesn't this follow from the data? More men than women are not having sex. I'm not sure how pronounced this is though. Women finding it difficult after a c…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 10:29 AM
3

I wonder if most problems are externalities. Men and women often blame each other collectively, but we act as individuals. You can behave better, as a man (woman), but women (men) will still often lump you in with other men (women).
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 09:49 AM
1

I don't disagree. But I'd say it could probably be summarised more simply: people who are less desirable have a harder time.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 09:35 AM
2

I think a big problem would be references that weren't genuine (i.e. traded or bought)
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 06:36 PM
1

If someone’s standards are met, as in they find the person they are looking whether that’s for casual sex or a serious relationship, how are their standards “too high”? If they are looking for it to be longer term than it is. I think the extent to which this happens may be exaggerated, but does anyone dispute it occurs?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 06:25 PM
1

That's interesting that significant numbers have those religious affiliations. Presumably if split by political affiliation, a lot will be Republican as well. What are the special protocols?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 10:04 PM
1

Or oral
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 09:08 PM
1

Not all political organizations are electoral. There are organizations advocating for rights of those who can't vote (such as prisoners, illegal immigrants, even animals).
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 08:53 PM
1

If they want to self-insert why do they watch a porn category that has male talent that's nothing like themselves? Doesn't a similar question arise in most heterosexual porn? Most men who watch porn are going to be physically inferior to most male talent. I don't think this diminishes their enjoyment though. The main thing is that they are enjoyable to watch. I think a big part of it is that attractive men make the women look better. ​ I think you are probably right about a lot of the motivation…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 08:19 PM
1

Isn't the racist idea that they are "superior physically, inferior mentally?"
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 07:56 PM
7

I think some countries which have banned abortions try to stop people going abroad to obtain them. I would point out though that people are taken out of the UK for FGM against their will, whereas in the case of abortions it would be a matter of choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/22 06:36 PM
4

No one is entitled to a relationship. The only thing anyone is entitled to is that any relationship they are in is healthy and non-abusive. The only thing a relationship must be is consensual. Relationships should be healthy, ideally. Also anyone who wants a relationship should be able to form one, ideally. But there is no way of imposing these conditions on people without violating rights. People can get in relationships with whoever will have them and stay in unhealthy relationships if that se…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 10:57 PM
1

I assume most posters are from the US and there is just massive cultural variation depending on things like location, religious affiliation and family background. Coastal and big city vs fly over and rural.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 04:25 PM
2

I'm staying at home just in case!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 03:24 PM
1

Are you only expecting answers from people who believe themselves to be obsessive in their posting on PurplePillDebate? I think it's interesting to read new viewpoints and interesting to see how others respond to them. It's also interesting to try to get a sense of which ideas and experiences many people share.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 03:07 PM
1

No, they aren't!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/22 03:01 PM
1

These things can be pretty great. But I think the nature most unsatisfied desires and unpleasant emotions are able to outweigh others. Similarly if someone is grief stricken they struggle to enjoy anything else. Or if someone is ashamed or feels a failure this may prevent them from enjoying ordinary pleasures. I suppose the question is whether it is something which should recede over time, or stay the same or get worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 06:11 PM
3

It's thought to be quite common to think about it. The actual rate is very low and even attempts are quite rare. It could just be that a lot of people never meet their conditions. But another possibility is that even though a lot of people want to die, that doesn't overcome the desire to stay alive. So as things get worse, maybe they find other reasons to live.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 05:58 PM
1

You know how women can look at other women and be like “damn she’s hot” ​ So as the title says. Are women more attractive/beautiful than men? I think it's partly because hot, attractive and beautiful are different things, though they overlap. Another possibility is that women are better able to notice beauty and hotness, because it is more important that they cultivate this by focusing on their own appearance.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/22 04:38 PM
3

Excellent point
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/22 05:12 PM
2

Yet their interest in a man skyrockets when they discover he has a girlfriend or wife. Why is this? I'm not even sure this is specific to sex and relationships. ​ Most men are the exact opposite, upon discovering a woman is unavailable we become completely disengaged, and she immediately loses all appeal. Isn't the opposite often claimed? That men are more likely to seek out opportunities to cheat than women. I would have thought it might be fairly equal, but some people suggest a big part of th…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/22 05:33 PM
1

I assume you mean sex, not gender. I think there would be tendency to be fairly close to 50:50. The main thing parents would want to avoid is having a child of the majority sex. For example, if babies were 60% male, they wouldn't want a boy, because they would be less likely to have successful relationships. I imagine this would apply to a lesser extent in countries where there is a strong preference. If parents did choose their child's sex, it would be very useful to have real time data, so tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/22 11:44 AM
1

I think the point about less attractive people being invisible is fair. It can still be quite hard. For the less attractive men, there will be a lot of effort, a lot of rejection and because they probably have fewer options, maybe also a lower probability of finding someone compatible. I wonder if compatibility, length and happiness of relationship varies depending on attractiveness.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/22 06:18 PM
1

I think there are "high" and "low" value men and women who "win". It's just that some have a higher probability of "winning." Some of it comes down to luck.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/22 06:39 PM
53

If you are reading this post, you are likely inexperienced with women, likely 17-25 years old, Is this true? I assumed a lot were a bit older (25-35?)
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/22 10:25 PM
3

Wearing heels doesn't make you taller! Imagine if you are 5ft 1-2 and wear heels and another women is 5ft 5 and isn't wearing heels. I might find you more attractive, because the heels make you look sexier.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/22 11:51 AM
5

Do you women wear high heels to appear taller, to appeal to men? I think it's more that the heels make a woman's body look sexier.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/22 11:39 AM
9

Some women want a man who is taller. Others want a man who will still be taller when she's wearing heels. A lot of men meet this requirement, but a lot don't. On OLD Some women probably require a certain height due to the risk of lying.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/22 10:50 AM
2

But the question is why height does that, instead of something else.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/22 10:45 AM
1

It would be interesting to know how the conversation went between saying no sex and saying sex with three men!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 09:50 PM
1

Not unless you consider 29 year olds children! "However, a study from the US has found that more than 20% of adolescent girls and 12% of boys do no sports or recreational physical activity in a week, with just under 30% of men and almost 40% of women, aged 18-29, saying the same."
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 09:29 PM
1

I would assume if there is any correlation - positive or negative - it would be quite weak. So plenty of people would probably feel it was contrary to their personal experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 09:07 PM
1

Way, way, way more adults exercise casually than do so competitively Girls and women do less competitive sport and less exercise. I mentioned competitive sport as that was an obvious example, and I thought the link to exercise was likely. Apparently there is a correlation: https://www.theguardian.com/society/2018/jun/11/boys-do-more-exercise-than-girls-research-finds ​ Ok, i don't want to do all the math but: according to PEW data, only 19% of women ager 30-49 are single, not all of whom are "lo…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 08:58 PM
1

It's much easier to find people to make friends with than to date or have sex with. I think this is because having a good personality is much more common than being good looking. I suppose arguably it could be the case that the threshold of personality could be lower for making friends though. Another point is that personalities probably tend to last longer than looks in most cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 08:14 PM
2

I wonder if that's exaggerated. Maybe it was a bit easier before smartphones and social media (though even then, there were tabloids and paparazzi).
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 08:00 PM
1

Now, data is also undecided on whether men or women exercise more, though there are a lot of studies. At the very least, it is a safe hypothesis that in addition to makeup, clothes and grooming, women also hit the proverbial gym. There seem to be more men than women taking part in sport. For team sports there are more teams for men than women. For individual sports there are more men than women. Compare various standards (qualifying times at state or regional level etc.) to world records and you…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/22 07:25 PM
1

Are men turned off by women earning more to a greater extent than women are turned on by men earning more? Also, wouldn't men be turned off by women being more educated? I think women probably do more to accentuate their attractiveness - makeup, clothes, grooming. But a lot of men go to the gym or exercise for the same purpose. I think the main difference in SMVs is when they peak and how quickly they decline. When you consider differences in ageing (especially after childbirth) it seems men cou…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/22 07:59 PM
2

Good point. I think a lot of people don't know enough single people though.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/22 06:49 PM
1

I think they aren't necessarily completely separable. Being confident or unconfindent change what you notice about someone, how you see them. The other point is that being confident won't outweigh being unattractive. But at a certain level of attractiveness, it makes a difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/22 08:33 AM
2

Is it just - or mainly - the conscious fear of becoming pregnant? Presumably for a lot of our history we didn't know that sex caused pregnancy. Were men and women equally keen on having sex in those (prehistoric) times? Of course, most women are keen to avoid pregnancy most of the time. But if this desire were the main factor, I would think women would experience attraction the same way as men, but have to consciously resist the temptation to act on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/22 01:11 PM
1

It's completely ridiculous. There are probably quite a small minority (at most a few percent) of men who pay for onlyfans. Furthermore, most of them will cluster around a small number of famous people. Probably a few thousand women each have a thousand or more subscribers. There aren't millions of women on onlyfans each with a handful if subscribers!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/22 10:14 PM
7

I think could be either 6 pack or 6 inches. Quadruple 6 would be both.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/22 09:54 AM
1

I think the distribution is probably more interesting than the mean. Do you have any information on that?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/22 09:45 AM
1

I'm surprised if a lot of men expect or demand to be seen this way. Is this something you see IRL, or something you see online?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/22 09:53 AM
1

One of the most common complaints from women about dating (particularly OLD, but this certainly predates OLD and occurs when people meet IRL as well) is being used by men (who weren't really into them) for sex. How do you think they miss it, if it's so clear?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 08:25 PM
1

Men who ask you out will normally have some combination of confidence and attraction to you: Man 1) Very confident (very at ease with rejection), asks out lots of women he isn't particularly attracted to Man 2) Less confident, but more attracted to you How do you distinguish between the two?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 08:16 PM
1

So how to distinguish between that and being into you?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 04:30 PM
1

How does that void the issue? I was just pointing out that a lot of advice seems to be based on implicit assumptions that the people who are receiving the advice can understand it and implement it. An intelligent man who has no problem understand social conventions, body language and can understand facial expressions, can understand your advice. If he was being creepy yesterday, he can stop being creepy today. I don't think that's the case for many, who lack these abilities.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 01:36 PM
1

Everyone should get better at everything. Some people do. But many don't.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 01:15 PM
2

If i liked a guy I would be flirtatious and they would end up asking me out. Isn't that self-defeating? The flirting gives the man confidence to ask you out, so you can't really be sure if he's confident.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 12:55 PM
1

I think there will still be men asking out despite their neuroticism, though I suppose there's no way to eliminate that entirely. Does it matter if he's very confident, but not very into you?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 12:53 PM
1

But it probably does require a level of intelligence and social skills that a significant minority of men lack.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 11:34 AM
1

OK. Assume someone thought I might be the father. I then had a test which proved I wasn't the father. Why would it need to go to court? If it did need to go to court, couldn't they rely on the testimony of the testers, or even just the record of the test*? "Yes, my colleagues and I performed the tests. They confirmed he wasn't the father." Why would the test need to be kept? *Aren't there numerous examples of this, in different contexts? Most of us have qualifications. We can prove we took exami…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/22 06:22 PM
1

Nothing about feminists explains why it wouldn't be possible to discard data after determining the result. Are all test results held in government databases? I'm not asking if it would be likely or politically feasible or whether powerful interest groups might prevail.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/22 05:54 PM
1

But would it be possible?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/22 05:03 PM
1

Do you think it would be possible to test without maintaining a database? Test, confirm paternity or not, then discard test results?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/22 04:39 PM
1

The vast majority of men are not truly interested in protecting femininity because they’re not interested in protecting women they aren’t related to or fucking. Does that include women they desire? An attractive woman will be treated better by men, regardless of whether they have a chance with her. Playing a meek, submissive, passive role in it will have you in a bad place that you can’t get out of. Women still overwhelmingly play the passive role in dating and relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/22 02:14 PM
1

Can anyone explain the quotes on male versus female sexuality? I can see how she gained an insight into how men are treated, but not what they desire. Do you think she based her comments on observing men in strip joints? (Is the point that men behave differently around other men, so she couldn't have observed men in a strip joint as a woman customer? Even if that's the case, wouldn't this be an experience that women strippers have? And also, are men in strip joints likely to be representative of…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/22 12:39 PM
1

"80% of men climax during casual sex." What about the other 20%? I can believe a few percent have ED, but 20% seems high.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/22 06:39 PM
1

I've set one up one here: https://www.reddit.com/r/Bumble/comments/so15e7/what_is_the_norm_for_a_first_date/
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 10:45 AM
2

Do you think PPD is representative though? I would have thought a dating subreddit might be more representative of dating! Maybe a meal is the norm in the US and a drink is the norm in the UK?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 01:16 AM
2

I don't see people saying they want to save money. I see a lot of people saying coffee or drinks because they want a short first date. I don't think there is a norm - I think it varies so much depending on the context. There's not even a norm about who pays. Sometimes the asker pays. Sometimes people split the bill. Especially if you meet people online, you could be going on a lot of dates. A quick drink is a lot more feasible than a meal.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 12:44 AM
4

I assume a big factor is how you met and how well you know each other prior to the date. If you met online, I thought a coffee was always preferable, as either or both might realize quickly it was unlikely to lead to anything and the awkwardness is limited. Whereas if you knew each other from some shared interest or club or work etc., you'd probably be confident you'd enjoy having a meal together.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 12:18 AM
2

I think they could arguably get what they want and be delusional about the part that men play in dating. The majority of relationships are initiated by the man and he will have likely had a lot of rejections beforehand. If a woman concludes that the relationship "just happened" she ignores that. Similarly men could be delusional about women's role and experience in dating. Women are often strung along by men who don't want to commit (either wanting casual sex rather than a relationship, or wanti…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 10:58 PM
1

Searching for intelligence sounds quite straightforward. I think a lot of intelligent people studied and lived together at elite universities and developed friendships which persisted. They also often work with other intelligent people. So there are clusters of them (if you know a few intelligent people, you can get introductions to others). Also their credentials indicate their intelligence. But how do you search for extremely high morals and character?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/22 12:52 AM
2

Men are trying to pass on their genes. The first part of this is having sex. The second part of this is protecting women during pregnancy and providing for and/or looking after the children. Even on a purely biological level, having sex with more women wouldn't be the only consideration. Being seen to be providing for children might lead to more sex (either with the mother of the children, or with other women).
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/22 02:38 PM
1

Do you think the differences in his behavior are mostly conscious or mostly unconscious? If he consciously treats you differently depending on how you are dressed and what you are doing, he might consider that just behaving appropriately.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 08:42 PM
1

People can be left or right because they favour different ends or because they believe different means are appropriate. Do men and women disagree more over ends or means?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 07:43 PM
3

Women view their husbands as family. Men view their wives as possessions. If this is usually true, is heterosexual love even feasible? Can you ever love a man if you think it is overwhelmingly likely that he views you as a possession?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 07:14 PM
5

I wonder if girls are actually more prone to this kind of obsession. They certainly seem more open about their attraction to boy bands and actors. Maybe girls get obsessed about a single man (and so might be prone to convincing themselves it's love?), whereas boys lust after a lot of different women?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 07:06 PM
3

men can become obsessed with women they’ve never met. They love them like objects; not human beings. I think men and boys are very easily attracted to women they've never met, but I think obsession is quite rare. I think women and girls may be more prone to obsession with men they've never met. For example, consider how many girls are obsessed with famous musicians (crowds of girls screaming for The Beatles, sobbing uncontrollably when some boy band broke up). Perhaps girls get obsessed with a m…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 06:48 PM
2

Some people use red-flag to refer to danger, but others use it to mean deal-breaker. Porn addiction isn't revealed before a date. It's something that might be observed directly (seeing internet searches), or they might not actually know it's porn addiction but they know their partner can't get an erection, or can't orgasm normally (either the problem is bad enough in itself, or they know it's due to porn - either way it's a deal-breaker for a woman who wants a normal sex life). I see a lot of wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 11:28 AM
1

But what about the women who can't find a partner? Even if nobody cares about men (or these men), it's bad for women (or at least the less desirable women).
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 11:05 AM
2

Personally I also feel like women have this strange advantage/curse situation when it comes to beauty standards and a the beauty industry. We are taught from pre-puberty that we HAVE to be clean and groomed and smell nice and don’t eat that and here’s how you do mascara and dress for your body shape and here’s how to make yourself look presentable no matter how much of a Quasimodo bitch you might truly be. I think this is mostly a curse, because it's usually misdirection. A lot of women will dev…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/22 12:53 AM
4

Problems with porn became much more prevalent over the last few decades. The growing proportion of people - especially men - becoming friendless and/or sexless has also been driven by social changes over the last few decades (people had more sex and closer social networks in the late 20th century). Also in the late 20th century it was a lot easier to support a family (or at least be an equal partner in a double income family) on a low/moderate income. Other people have suggested that things like…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 11:39 PM
-2

I think causation runs both ways and is cumulative. For example a lot of people start using porn and develop a habit (get addicted?) at a young age, before dating is really an option. Some have had sex but not friends. Others have friends but not sex. What do you think women do if they are undateable? Far fewer women are porn addicts or have no friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 10:42 PM
-1

If the red flag is having little or no sex/relationships, then the fact that is the case for more men than women is what is important. Is any other stat relevant? By the way, I think women would tend to be more disconcerted by the lack of past relationships, and lack of current friends. And these are harder to fake or lie about.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 10:31 PM
0

I agree on those points. But aren't the issues with porn, lack of friends and sex/relationship experience problems experienced by a lot more men than women?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 10:16 PM
1

My question isn't about whether women can find a man though. Undesirable women can land men they consider undateable, but as they deem they undateable, they don't date them. They may be able to have casual sex with some more dateable men, but there aren't enough such men to go around.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/22 10:14 PM
1

When a man finds a woman attractive, it will usually be due to a combination of features. I think men who are fixated on a particular body part are in the minority.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/22 09:46 PM
1

But presumably 1/3rd of messages is still a very big number, so the bottom 2/3rds of women still get a lot of messages. If that's the case, men don't typically ignore average women to focus on attractive women. They pursue both.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/22 12:50 PM
2

Childhood must have been rough
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/22 02:45 PM
5

What do virgins smell like?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/22 02:27 PM
3

Is this mostly based on what they tell you, or do you work out some of it yourself? (e.g. seeing a wedding ring instead of them telling you they are married) Also are the 10% telling you they are virgins, or is it just based on them acting differently?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/22 01:52 PM
3

Another stigma present in that generation was children out of wedlock. A lot of couples these days plan to stay together but never marry. I wonder if the break-up rate of such couples differs from the divorce rate.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/22 12:14 AM
2

I was referring to sex without a date. Here are the examples I was thinking of: If a man and a woman meet at a club, where there is little opportunity to talk. If they decide to go home together, either there was an almost instant connection (maybe through dancing rather than talking?) or it was purely based on looks. Groupies - they wouldn't have time to develop a connection. Sex in sex clubs/parties. Swinging and group sex might also count (I suppose it would depend on if they had a chance to …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 11:54 PM
2

Marriages should be locked down!
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 10:47 PM
7

But if this were true of all women, then no women would ever hook up with a man she just met. So whilst most women need a lot more connection than most men, some women do not. Perhaps also the more attractive a man is, the more likely women are to feel a connection with him quickly.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 10:44 PM
3

Doesn't it depend on the context? If a man and woman meet naturally (when maybe one or both of them didn't foresee any kind of romantic interest), they may develop a connection and end up in a relationship. But if a man or woman has lots of interest (e.g. hundreds of matches on OLD, or gets hit on frequently - e.g. can expect to get hit on multiple times when out) then isn't it natural to start measuring them like they are baseball cards initially, simply in order to narrow them down to a manage…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 09:46 PM
1

That could be a big factor. I think that's probably true of sex more than relationships though. I think the majority of people still want children though and hope to find a partner to have them and raise them with. If a women is single in her 30s and wants a child, perhaps she has a stronger need for a man in his 30s than vice versa (if the man is unsuccessful, he could still find a woman in his 40s and have a child).
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 09:31 PM
3

The optimal figure of 27 for men sounds believable, but 17 for women doesn't - surely most men like curves too much for this to be the case. Oddly, I just googled "most attractive bmi for a man" and this was the featured snippet: "This suggests that men with low-normal body weight but not underweight are most preferred by women as partners. This finding is in line with previous studies on men's attractiveness and BMI, which found that the most preferred male bodies resemble BMI around 21 kg/m2 (…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 08:22 PM
0

Even when women needed to marry, men still had to compete (with other men, unless they wanted to settle) and prove their value (to the woman's father, even if the woman herself had no say). So men have always had an incentive to be better in order to marry well. The fact that women couldn't escape abusive marriages in the past doesn't have a bearing on single men today - they have always known this was a thing of the past.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 07:55 PM
12

Has this become the case for women at a faster rate than for men though? Women are able to lead independent lives that weren't possible as recently as the mid 20th century. So it makes sense that women have higher standards than then, but does it make sense if they have higher standards than men? Men are also able to lead independent lives, so I'm not sure this would follow.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 06:20 PM
-1

The situation with height is obviously clearer. When we observe couples, we can observe their height easily. Also, there is broad agreement on whether a particular height is tall or short (and we can look up percentages even if not everyone agrees). I don't think we can say the same about being slim or jacked - the threshold is less obvious. For women, does slim mean flat stomach, low BMI (20ish?), healthy BMI (up to 25), or just not overweight (under 30?)? For men, what does jacked mean? I'm 6f…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 05:54 PM
2

Female slim = male jacked. Women can be slim, but ugly (or butt ugly!) and men can be jacked but ugly. They can also be attractive despite not being slim or jacked. I see a lot of women saying "please be taller than me, taller than 6ft." I don't see many women saying "please be more jacked than me" So I think male slim is closer to female slim in terms of attractiveness than you are implying.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/22 05:12 PM
2

There are other similarities between jobs and dating. The best job isn't usually available straight away, so it may make sense to remain unemployed (single) for a long time. Or maybe it makes sense to take jobs that definitely won't be the for long term (single, or some kind of non-LTR arrangement) whilst looking for the long term. On the other hand, some people accept a job offer (get into a relationship) early and stay there, despite there possibly being better options.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/22 11:21 AM
11

My attempt at a charitable interpretation is that it's more about preventing the spread of ideas deemed to be harmful rather than letting them suffer in silence. A lot of men who live in this area have a very low probability of success, but the online communities they form are read by men in areas without the same structural issues. These men may then end up incorrectly believing the same causes explain their lack of success, which is harmful to them and others.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/22 10:51 AM
6

I often say this and nobody listens! If there was one app that was clearly better, people would flock to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/22 11:35 PM
2

Dating down and settling are different. Settling means being with someone who is less desirable than you. I think Dating down can refer to looks or income/status/education. An attractive person with an unattractive person or a college educated high earner with someone of average or below average income no college. Dating down isn't necessarily settling, as other factors may be valued more. Its usually helpful to elaborate on what is meant by Dating down when using that term.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/22 11:00 AM
2

A significant proportion of people are finding relationships from OLD. So for these people, the advantages appear to outweigh the disadvantages. We all have varying offline and online experiences. You're right that people are likely to have a lot more bad dates from OLD. But if someone is getting very few dates offline and quite a lot online, OLD could still be better for them. Probably everyone should be open to meeting people offline and actively try this. Then supplement with OLD if like elem…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 08:36 PM
2

If women prefer choosing men on apps, why do men outnumber women on them? I think the consensus is that it's quite easy for women to obtain sex from men (either openly casual sex, or sometimes they don't realise they will be pumped and dumped). But if it were easy for women to get LTR from OLD (especially with men out of their league), wouldn't that also be a reason for more women to use OLD? Shouldn't this process almost lead towards a balanced sex ratio? Do experiences just vary enormously? So…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 08:09 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter