TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

Guilty-Marzipan1058 Archive

View 2 posts and 127 comments by Guilty-Marzipan1058 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
15

Question For WomenGuilty-Marzipan1058/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:02 AM
15

Question For WomenGuilty-Marzipan1058/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 04:28 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
5

I think a lot of women give this advice in good faith because that’s how it generally works for them. Being the sex that initiates vs receiving initiation makes the whole experience entirely different, as a guy who has been approached by women that know me and strangers. It’s such an important dynamic that drives so many fundamental behaviors and expectations between men and women, but almost nobody talks about it in its own right.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 06:11 PM
2

I think married men kind of self select for higher lifespan (eg wealthier, less likely to be antisocial/depressed/unhealthy before marriage, etc). At the end of the day it is a market which is amoral, but I think that woman should definitely be transparent about the dynamic. Women also fear not being truly attractive to their partner vis-a-vis an ex, I don’t think that’s a gendered insecurity by any standard. I would imagine that most men would rather die alone (even if its sooner), but if a man…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 06:27 PM
6

Human Trafficking is not dating/marriage Do you believe that men will abuse non-western women but not abuse western women? Is there any basis for this? Sex Tourism is not dating/marriage Most mid men get virtually zero opportunities with women, and women are openly telling them that they are not wanted. If you were to restrict mid men from going where they are wanted, would you also tell mid women that they should date mid men?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 12:25 AM
8

Im going to take this view in good faith and assume you’re not trolling, why do you believe it needs to be stopped exactly?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 11:05 PM
1

Globalization has made getting a job easier not harder. If you struggled competing against sweatshop workers from the global south, you would’ve struggled getting a factory job in your local town
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 02:04 AM
4

Isn’t this the main reason women are pickier than men?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/25 01:52 AM
6

Most men are not abusive, don’t want the world to burn, nor do they want to punish single mothers. Those are bad men, and women are right to avoid them There are also good men, who exhibit the qualities you laid out. However, I see a lot of women with the binary thinking, like a man either “good” or “bad”.Like most characteristics, the quality of men is probably a normal distribution/bell curve. The higher you set your standard for a “good man” the rarer they are going to be. This applies to men…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 02:51 PM
4

How about people generally date around their age? The average 20 year old is 20 years old
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 12:00 AM
1

I do this with conversation a lot. I don’t want to talk after a 10 hour day but it’s my “duty” to talk to my gf and I’m an asshole if I don’t. Men connect physically, women connect verbally
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 10:01 PM
4

Socialists are just economically insecure because of their negative experiences with employers in the past
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/25 08:08 PM
1

I think you might be onto something? Fathers have stepped back in this regard, but how does strategic bitchiness work in practice?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 11:39 AM
9

I think you guys are thinking of the black pill. They believe that looks are all that matter. I’m not saying the redpill is correct about personality, but they definitely do think how you conduct yourself matters. I just don’t think they conduct themselves in ways that women actually find attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 03:09 PM
6

I would say the redpill tends to focus of “social dominance” quite a bit, while women tend to focus on “confidence”. If you’re talking about being kind, then yea I’d agree redpill does t really cover that
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 11:52 AM
2

In the Victoria’s Secret model example, what I think I’d actually be saying is that I don’t place a very high worth on getting into a relationship and only if I had an extremely favorable outcome would I consider entering a relationship. There’s nothing wrong with that, but there’s an overwhelming likelihood that I’d stay single, which would be fine by me in this example. What a lot of women see to be getting at is that they are decentering relationships generally which is their choice. That’s w…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/25 05:16 PM
5

I don’t see how your happiness (or lack thereof) has anything to do with the reasonableness of your standards. If I say that want a Victoria’s Secret model but I’m happy to be single if not, I’m effectively saying that I’m happy to be single. That doesn’t make my standard any more reasonable. If your argument is that men writ large are not meeting women’s standards (eg emotional intelligence, fashion, etc.), the debate should be around whether those standards are reasonable not the degree to whi…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/25 05:04 PM
7

If your standard is so high that nobody that meets those standards will date you, then I’d say your standards are “unreasonably high”. I think there’s a friction that men face that women don’t, which is the expectation to initiate a relationship, but there are plenty of men who have standards that “unreasonably high” as well. It doesn’t matter what a single person deems your value, but what the gender you’re interested in deems you on an aggregate level generally does matter.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/25 04:50 PM
5

If you want to miss my point that’s on you. People deal with bullshit from attractive people
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 02:03 AM
6

I dont think women love misogyny itself, but they will accept misogyny if the man is sufficiently attractive. Men aren’t any better about it, we just call them out as simps
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 10:36 PM
10

Can you point me to any feminist literature that criticizes women specifically for upholding patriarchal male gender norms, such as the expectation of being a provider/running a financial deficit with women? I’m by no means an expert on the subject, but it seems like people who are versed on it will say that feminism does address these double standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 05:08 PM
33

I think very academic versions of feminism tend to agree with this point, but stop when the analysis gets into any territory around how women benefit from these gender roles specifically. Taking the disproportionate societal pressure that men have to be economically successful for example, many mainstream women generally benefit from this patriarchal gender role, even if they harmed by the consequence of men inevitably earning more because of their increased willingness to endure unpleasant work…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 03:58 AM
3

So should men not focus on money or status then?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/25 11:51 PM
–

I think a woman that takes care of herself should expect a man to. From what I see though, there are lot more men who are obsessed with the gym than women, and women are much more likely to be severely obese than men are. That’s not to say that there aren’t other things that might not be prioritizing enough (e.g. fashion, hygiene, communication), but I think men are actually better on the physical fitness front
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 02:22 PM
2

Again though, I’d want to ask if you have any data countering this claim. I agree that we should not take a sample of 8,000 as gospel, but a survey conducted by Pew Research is not something I’m going to simply wave away just because other institutions haven’t replicated it yet. If people want to dismiss the “findings” of this survey, they should attempt to replicate it themselves
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/25 11:57 AM
13

Do you have a source to counter this? 8,000 seems like a pretty appropriate sample size for you know… a sample?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 04:28 PM
1

About half of young men are no longer approaching women specifically because they are being told by women that they are scared or disgusted by men. Men who have bad intentions are a lot more likely to try to approach a lot of women, believe me as a man who hears men talk when women are not around. I’m sorry that they got raped, but I think you’d hear a lot more stories of women being raped/ sexually manipulated by men who approach them and hide their intentions. I don’t see how women approach me…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 04:42 PM
1

I have a long term girlfriend (who I asked out), but I’ve also been asked out multiple times. That’s why I think it’d be a good thing actually, I’ve gotten a perspective on how women have to deal with that situation that I think a lot of men don’t have leading to them not being sympathetic to women. You seem to contradicting yourself unless I’m not understanding. You’re saying men who want marriages are extremely rare, but also men wanting relationships are also more common than women? My positi…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 03:49 PM
1

So there are more women than “extremely rare” men that want marriage and kids, I would think that women should take some initiative in trying to find these men. It looks like the marriage rate has about halved since the 80s. Many women say this is a good thing, and that’s their choice. I think if most men want a relationship and a large portion of women don’t, it should be on the women to put themselves “on the market” instead of making men go through unnecessary rejection and wasted time/energy…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 03:27 PM
1

If you see dating men as more of a “risk”than an opportunity/reward, why should men come up to you to begin with? Most men (and women) are on track to die alone under the status quo anyways
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 03:14 PM
1

Not trying to be combative or anything, but doesn’t that kind of prove the point that she passed the test OP is talking about? I think if it’s bad for men to get worked up about rejection before sex it’s probably bad for women to get worked up about rejection after sex, maybe I’m missing your point
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 02:18 AM
1

Are you a married dude because your wife was the first sap to sleep with you or did she meet your personal standards?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 02:12 AM
1

Yes, both men and women still use these addictions in relationships. Do you think women should quit social media before entering a relationship then?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 07:01 PM
1

I think you actually hit the nail on the head better than I ever could. Women want validation/connection from men more than vice versa, just like men want sex from women more than vice versa. Men use porn how women use social media, as a coping mechanism for not having fulfillment from what a healthy relationship should bring you. You literally called porn an addiction in your prior comment, and is being studied by the NIH and APA as such. This isn’t about saying one sex has more valid addiction…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 06:38 PM
1

Yea, so the point I’m saying is maybe men should focus a little less on climbing the ladder or trying to find what “works” and what doesn’t with women and spend a little more time focusing on their own emotional development. It seems like you think this is a personal shortcoming or sense of entitlement when you yourself are saying there is a systemic problem with addiction. If another demographic struggles with addiction, you’d probably think there’s an underlying reason for that no?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 06:18 PM
2

Such as?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 06:11 PM
1

Success for a man is typically framed in terms of a status/power hierarchy, this is what drives many men to prioritize “success” at the expense of emotional development. Why do you think so many young men are obsessed with “the grind” while young women are generally not? I don’t think anyone ever has advocated for anyone to be addicted to anything, red or blue pill. If you’re saying that’s the issue with men I’d agree with you, there’s a lack of emotional development to regulate emotions and thu…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 05:28 PM
-1

Yea, young women and girls. That’s the demographic we’re talking about, unless you’re thinking geriatric dating. She’s literally the number one singer in the world.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:02 PM
3

Isn’t that they’re whole meme about women? They they’re playing 4d chess with men that they want to have wrapped around their finger Taylor Swift’s song Mastermind comes to mind
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 01:25 PM
2

Do you mean men and women should be in the same social spaces? I think that’s definitely a part of the issue, a lack of a third space that’s actually gender neutral. Maybe there’s a gym, but women not wanting to be approached there is a mainstream meme at this point. I agree that finger pointing isn’t the solution, I do think that the status quo is dysfunctional and isn’t helping either sex. What kind of “masculine” or “feminine” activities do you think would be more popular with the other sex i…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 01:21 PM
3

I’ve seen the distributions, it’s pretty brutal. I just think woman aren’t going to “settle” for their equals on the distribution, and men should not be culturally expected to get rejected by more people than their ancestors evolved to meet in their entire life.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 01:13 PM
0

My title is about women doing it, not men. Do you want to answer the actual question?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 12:25 PM
2

Do you have any intentions of entering a relationship in the future, and if so are you planning on being active or passive? Don’t mean to sound so interrogative lol
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 05:34 AM
2

I agree that many men their get depressed or lash out, but again, I think that socialized gender norms around this expectation to approach is a bigger factor than you care to admit. Going up to strangers at a bar or an app is not natural, and humans are not psychologically equipped to deal with hundreds of rejections. It’s exactly why most people don’t do well in sales, but you have to put yourself in that position as a man if you want romantic connection. That has a mental/emotional toll that I…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 05:32 AM
2

And how did that work out for you?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 05:21 AM
2

I agree with the sentiment, which is actually why I’m making this post. I think men could use a little more of this mindset, but at the end of the day for any social interaction to happen, someone has to make the first move. In order for a trade between businesses or even two friends to hang out one has to approach the other and ask if they want to do something. If one friend says no 99% of the time, I don’t think it’s unreasonable for the other friend to either cut off the friendship or just wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 05:20 AM
2

I’ve been pursued many times, I’m aware that women pursue just not for most men. That’s why I don’t believe in this appeal to nature that some women here have made. That said, I think you could be right about women having a lower general interest in sex than men are. Do you think it’d be a better message to tell men “if she wants you she’ll let you know” rather than the current alternative?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 03:21 AM
3

Yeah I agree with you, when the women are not interested. That’s kind of the whole point of approaching someone though, to see if they’re interested? I can tell you I’ve had more women in my life (family, friends, etc) talk about it in “chase” language like it’s a good thing. My father pretty much told me that yea it sucks but that’s the ticket to entry. Most men see it more as a job application than a sort of game, unless you’re in middle/high school I guess
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:43 AM
0

I think it “comes from other men” in the same way slut shaming “comes from other women”. We know which sex really benefits from both of these gender norms. The older women in a family/society slut shame younger women because they know that women who don’t live up to standards of purity are seen as less desirable to men in their view. In the same way, older men in family/society push the idea of “getting out there” on younger men because men who don’t live up to the standards of traditional mascu…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:30 AM
3

Do you agree that the active role in pursuing women is one of the core roles that men are expected to fill under our current system? If that is something you spend a lot of time trying to live up to and you get nothing out of it, can you see how some portion of people are going to feel more entitled to a particular outcome? I’m not saying it’s right, but I don’t think women are all that different on this. If society tells you to get a college degree, you do so, and there’s no job at the end of i…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:22 AM
1

If men want to what exactly? I’m saying women should do thing if they want to. Men are already complaining aren’t they?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:18 AM
0

Well I think that there would still be a fair bit of resentment, but I think that the societal expectation of getting a woman puts unnecessary pressure on men and makes them put more energy into finding a woman than actually becoming more well balanced people that would actually be more pleasant to date. This definitely wouldn’t be a fix-all, but I think it’d be an overall improvement
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:17 AM
2

Yes I agree with you, I’ve been out multiple times and I think it’s definitely given me a healthier perspective than if I were never asked out. That said, most of my male peers have not and the ones who struggle to get a woman mostly have negative effects on their psyches whether they become red pilled or blue pilled
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:12 AM
0

Sorry, only if who wants to?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:09 AM
13

I mean, yea I think that’d be the idea. Just focus on yourself and enjoying your own life instead of running a rat race. A man who would die alone under the status quo would probably die alone under this system too, he might as well enjoy his life no?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:09 AM
-1

Couldn’t you say that about literally any ideology? This just seems like slippery slope
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/25 05:56 AM
2

So you don’t believe the whole beauty standard thing?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 08:47 PM
1

Yea, what causes them to find them reasonably attractive? You don’t need to know calculus or have some social construct in your head, birds and insects are able to pick on traits pretty easily
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 08:31 PM
2

Yea but i think what OP is saying is that WHR is the primary factor for men, kinda like how height is for women. I’d agree that WHR ratio is analogous for SHR anatomically, but in terms of sexual selection I think OPs point largely stand
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 08:28 PM
3

Women must be pretty damn malicious, because most women wouldn’t be caught dead complimenting a man. If you want men to compliment women again, you need to call out the women who call it harassment, or deal with it
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/25 06:36 PM
3

Hey that’d help single young men, go for it lol
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/25 12:49 AM
1

That’s what this entire subreddit is about. Most men may not call their worldview a “pill” exactly (even though many more men than women do) they do generally support one of those three camps if they were pressed on it. Even if a man doesn’t know the exact definition of “red pill”, he probably has some words to say about Andrew Tate one way or another I guess the point of this post is that I think it’d be more productive for the purpose of this subreddit if women actually said their own beliefs …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 03:16 PM
3

I’m sorry she’s going through that. It seems like a lot of (specifically older) married people feel single in their relationships. We should be setting higher standards on emotional intimacy in relationships and marriages, and I think as a younger generation we are which is a good thing
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 03:12 PM
1

I’d agree, women generally are more agreeable and I doubt women are going to throw their real social reputation into risk for some argument on this. However, we’re on a subreddit specifically to disagree on this exact topic. Would this not be the venue to do it?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 02:59 PM
1

Thanks for womansplaining male discourse to me lol. Yes there are probably some far out beliefs that some men have but trust me most men generally fall into one of those camps, even if two men in the same camp disagree on some smaller point.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 02:57 PM
2

I was expecting this comment at some point. The TERF debate is around whether to let in a transwomen/man who want to be a woman into the sisterhood essentially. This is not a disagreement on how cis men should interact with women or vice versa. Can you bring up another mainstream disagreement about how men and women should interact within feminism?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 02:52 PM
4

Yea I think that checks out, the black pill for women would look completely different from the black pill for men. I guess 4B might be an example of that What is pink pill exactly though?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 02:49 PM
2

This is probably the best response so far. Yea pills definitely got started with men, but I think it’s important to understand the general camps that women are finding themselves in. A lot of men tend to think that most women hold contradictory, self serving beliefs. In reality they hold different beliefs that generally seem to map into clusters, I think we just don’t see these clusters or “pills” try to distinguish themselves from other so we know who we’re talking to. You’re flaired redpill, d…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 02:46 PM
-1

So you’re okay with more and more men following the Andrew Tate style approach to dating? This is an extreme example, I guess my underlying point is that the preferences of your counterparty on a societal level actually kinda matter. You also seem to post on this subject too, you have no interest in changing the way men treat women?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 02:31 PM
1

Did you actually read the post lmao
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 02:21 PM
0

You’re on a subreddit that specifically argues about gender roles. You have the flair “blue pill woman” , you clearly are taking a side in this debate and you care enough to be posting here. Do you think think it’s simply preference like pizza topping when men share their views on how women act?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 02:10 PM
8

My aunt has confided in me multiple times that her biggest regret is not getting married and that she’s scared of dying alone. She’s cried in my arms in a drunken stupor about it and has a breakdown every time someone in the family dies because she has no serious support system. Real life is not a sitcom, life gets hard and it can be scary. I get my story is just one person, but you social network gets smaller as you get older and platonic friends are mostly not going to be there like family wil…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 04:40 AM
1

I’m sorry, I’m not sure I’m following. You’re saying that these women are not hooking up with anyone because they can’t get Chad to commit? What do you think is causing femcels to begin with?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 03:09 AM
3

While there are women that say not to date any men (eg 4B movement), I think it’s much more common for women to tell each other to wait for Mr.Right to appear in her life even though she likely doesn’t interact with men her age on a regular basis. If you set your standards above what’s actually out there, you are effectively choosing to stay single.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/25 05:50 PM
2

Saying what, that they should stay single? How are these women communicating with one another if not social media given OPs assumption about social isolation?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/25 05:33 PM
8

I think what you’re saying might alter the red pill argument but doesn’t fundamentally negate it. A lot of social media tells young women not to lower their standards under any circumstance, which is leading to more women choosing to be single rather than hooking up with men that are frankly out of their league. Taking your ball and going home when you don’t get exactly what you want isn’t much better than only playing with the popular kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/25 04:47 PM
0

Ok, so are you going to change that and be more active?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/25 04:33 AM
1

That’s exactly what’s going to happen when you socially stigmatize approaching people at school, work, etc. Just like I think men to hold each other to socially agreed standards around consent, I think women need to hold each other to socially agreed standards about where/how it’s unambiguously acceptable for men to approach them outside of dating apps/nightclubs. Maybe that means coworkers at are in a certain age range and same level, maybe grocery stores, idk. But saying that you are allowed t…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/25 12:08 AM
2

I’ve been approached quite a bit (+10 times). I was almost always out of their league. I know this because not only was I not attracted to them, I had different guys (and some women) tell me the same. There were one or two that were attractive but were very sexual very early on and that weirded me out Experiencing my own discomfort to these unattractive women approaching as well as others reactions made me more self conscious about making women uncomfortable by approaching them. I do agree with …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 04:13 AM
2

“Our study shows 40% of states aim to give children equal time with each parent.”, this doesn’t even show that the reality of parenting is equal within these states. This article says at the beginning that nationwide fathers get about 35% of time with the children, which would indicate that mothers spend about twice the amount of time with the children. Regardless, if I don’t have a child it’s not in my interest to deal with someone else’s baggage and vice versa. I think giving men more rights (…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/25 05:10 PM
2

Women typically get custody, so it’s a bigger burden to date a single mom than a single dad. Once courts start giving men equal custody as a cultural norm I imagine this will change.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/25 11:42 AM
0

I think this is largely true, but I also think men having a reasonable expectation that if they meet particular requirements whether it financial success or just personality, would let men focus a little less on trying to get women and a little more on either working on themselves or just enjoying life. A lot of women are happily single because they know roughly what kind of man they could get if they wanted to get into a relationship, there’s a sense of security in that which men simply don’t h…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 04:14 PM
5

It’s nobody’s specific obligation to to make anyone’s else specific success happen, but as a society we can acknowledge that the rules to finding success can/should be changed. In the job market for example, it’s nobody’s “responsibility” to find you a job, but we unless you’re a bootstrap boomer you should be able to acknowledge that a dysfunctional labor market will make it much harder to find success.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 04:11 PM
2

Is Francis in the room with us? Jokes aside I don’t think the physique of the guy makes it any better or worse, I think a frail woman following me would freak me out
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 12:13 AM
1

Relatively stable hormones
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 12:12 AM
1

I think a lot of feminists think that because they personally do not hold these expectations of men, that these views are not prevalent among mainstream culture. Kind of similar to men that think that just because they don’t think women should be in the kitchen that no other men believe that.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 01:53 AM
-6

Just forget hypergamy or branch swinging, how do you explain that women are increasingly cheating in monogamous relationships? Not trying to bash all women, and I know that the question is about what you would do specifically
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/25 11:20 AM
2

Im actually a financial analyst as a job, I agree with you. People should be saving for emergencies and children. That is not the point I’m making. I’m not sure why you’re bringing up financial responsibility when that is clearly not my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 08:06 PM
3

If he dies in an accident, you would likely inherit the bulk of his money or if he’s responsible he should have life insurance. This is just such a disingenuous take I’ve heard so many times. If you can hide money from your spouse, why can’t you hide a paternity test?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 02:50 PM
3

You leave, just like if there were abuse. It’s not a perfect analogy since there’s no such thing as a perfect analogy. There are spouses (mostly women) who save money with the intent of being able to divorce at a moments notice. https://www.thestreet.com/personal-finance/red-flags-that-your-spouse-is-hiding-money-and-what-to-do-about-it
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 02:44 PM
3

I think you might have missed my point. I’m trying to make an analogy about one partner not trusting the other. Many people, including OP, seems to understand that stashing money away from your partner displays a lack of trust
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 02:32 PM
5

I think if men had a fraction of the choices that women had, more men would have a problem with it like women do.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 05:44 AM
0

This is like the difference between a job candidate “decentering” finding a job and an employer “decentering” finding a candidate. The leverage is and always has been extremely lopsided. Women used to care because their socio-economic status depended on it. Now there’s literally no countermeasure to this dynamic.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 01:08 AM
7

Hey if you think women saving to protect themselves is something that men should be offended by then I think you’re being consistent. Idk if I can totally agree but I respect your position.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 12:40 AM
8

Just want to make sure, you think if a woman feels the need to save her own money then it’s questionable why she’s with him to begin with?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 12:35 AM
5

Should a man be offended if his wife stores her own money away? I personally would find that offensive, but I think that’s a rational thing to do, no?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 12:33 AM
13

Again, how does the pain of pregnancy have anything to do with whether it’s his kid or not? This seems similar to a guy saying if he went through the trouble of saving up for a ring/planning a wedding he won’t be abusive later down the line. Just seems like a category error imo
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 12:29 AM
18

If it’s socially acceptable for women to store money on their own away in case of divorce, a man getting a paternity test (even secretly) seems pretty reasonable. Just because pregnancy is painful doesn’t make the kid magically his?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 12:18 AM
1

Yeah I think a lot of men get frustrated because it’s generally on men to make the connection. I get what you mean, but it’s really easy to sit back and wait for your options to come to you. I think it’d be a much easier pill to swallow if women were going out and pursuing what they wanted
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 02:04 AM
1

I think you have it right pretty much that men do it not out blatant coercion or anything, but the competition effectively requires it. I think if we’re going to get rid of this norm, along with most other outdated norms around masculinity, dating needs to be approximately as competitive for women as it is for men. Maybe that means there are less men dating, maybe we change some other norms
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/25 11:48 PM
1

True, but this is why society generally allows for women being more selective or seeing themselves as “the prize” or “the table”. I’m fine with advocating for relationships/marriages where women get a relatively more advantageous position, but then I think we should also have an expectation of men being able to be a bit more picky and women be a bit more proactive in pursuing/courting the men they actually want. That doesn’t mean inverse the current norms around courtship, just that courtship sh…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/25 06:57 PM
2

So I guess what I’m confused about is what being dominant and submissive is to you. I hear a lot of women say they don’t like being submissive because it’s a raw deal for them, do you think it’d be a raw deal if a man did it? I know im asking a lot questions, but that’s because most women who say they don’t want to be submissive say they want equality, which I don’t think really works when it kills the polarity of a relationship. It’s interesting to see a woman explicitly want the roles reversed…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 09:47 PM
3

Isn’t that kind of the problem men face? Women being quiet or shy about what they want? I think that’s just part of being the initiator. Personally I think we should encourage women to take a more proactive role in courtship generally, so I’ll give you props on that. It’s just difficult being the one to win someone else over.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 09:40 PM
2

Do you have a hard time finding these men? I’d imagine it’d be pretty easy, looking at the comments
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 09:35 PM
5

What do you mean by a “submissive man” exactly? Do you want to pay for his meals, are you gonna ask him out, or is it purely sexual?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 09:31 PM
1

I opened up to my ex and yes she held it against me and didn’t respect me for the rest of the relationship. It’s a real thing women do and it’s bad, end of story. I’m lucky I can open up to my current gf, and I think men need to start dumping women who do that. Regarding “basic decency”, that’s just to get your foot in the door. It’s like telling someone not to come to a job interview drunk and disheveled. Yes, that’s good advice, but the real problem is how competitive dating has gotten for man…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/25 04:49 AM
1

This whole “personal responsibility” schtick just reeks of boomeresque bootstrap theory. There is a fundamental sociological change with women gaining financial and sexual autonomy.The understanding between women and men needs to fundamentally change. Part of this is personal responsibility, learning emotional intelligence, helping more with domestic duties etc. However, there has been virtually no discussion about women’s behaviors and more specifically their selection process of men in a roman…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/25 10:20 PM
1

I think there’s a fair point in the average man being jaded by 30, but it’s for the exact opposite reason. The average man under 30 is practically an incel, whereas women generally have the issue of being unable to find a man they are satisfied with. I would guess the average man has had much less heartbreak, but a lot more frustration and rejection. If a man was a player through his 20s, I think your point would stand a lot more than Joe Schmoe.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/25 10:14 PM
31

Submission is consensual. I had an ex that was into this, I verbally told her that I wasn’t really into it but went along. After we broke up, she tried to turn it around on me and say I forced myself on her, immediately shut it down and never talked to her again. I will never have sex with a woman that brings this up again, thankfully my current gf is normal. This is why I’m a little skeptical about (some of) #MeToo. Monsters are scary, but wrongly being called a monster is also scary.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/25 10:01 PM
–

I think it’s pretty clear women don’t want to get hit on in really any social context unless they are attracted to the man. Personally, I think if women are pickier or less likely to want to get into a relationship to begin with, it makes more sense for women to approach men. You can still have the man plan or pay for the date if that’s a sticking point, but it just seems like a massive waste of everyone’s time and emotional energy to keep a social norm that seems to frustrating both sexes.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/25 02:46 AM
1

So you think masturbation is gendered, but the tool used to masturbate isn’t gendered?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/25 06:11 AM
5

No, it’s really not to your advantage. I’ve been approached by women quite a bit before and it’s a much more advantageous position, they have to prove themselves to you. There’s a reason employers generally don’t reach out to potential candidates (unless they’re extremely qualified). Women complain about unwanted approaches, but ask any normal woman and they will tell you that they prefer being approached. I don’t blame them, it puts you in a better social position. This is why bumble never did …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 09:58 PM
0

Maybe he’s a white feminist lol
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 09:51 PM
2

The manosphere is made up of disaffected traditionalist men, they are largely incels because of the incompatibility with women who want an egalitarian relationship. The rise of feminism leading to single men has largely occurred I the the last “10ish years” and there is a growing number of men who grew up in traditional households who are moving toward the manosphere. If you want more egalitarian relationships, I think we need to acknowledge that society has double standards (in romance specific…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 09:49 PM
5

Do you think these cultures just disappeared in the last 10ish years? I just want to reiterate again, I’m personally not planning on pursuing that model, but I have friends (in our mid 20s) living in these kinds of marriages. Just because it is alien to you doesn’t mean that it’s backwards or abusive. There are many cultures that follow this model, both have their risks and rewards for both men and women. I’m not in favor of forcing women to be traditional, but it sounds like you’re shaming men …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 09:39 PM
8

Im sorry man, this is just a pretty bad take. Women are allowed to approach or scan the area same as men, it’s about social obligations. If it were a perk, women would be pushing to be “able” to approach men, but they’re smart enough to realize that the status quo puts them at a disadvantage at our expense. Bumble, an app literally designed on the premise that you seem to be advocating (ie approaching is empowering) literally got rid of the “empowering” feature of having women approach first. ht…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 09:33 PM
10

That’s statistically just not true though. The median woman objectively gets more matches online and gets more approaches irl than the median man. Feel like I’m walking into hot water here, but that sounds like a republican saying that there are some rich black people and some poor white people therefore there is no structural inequality between the two. We can argue why that inequality is there, but acting like there’s no such thing as standard or median seems intentionally ignorant
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 09:26 PM
13

I came from a “traditional” household like what you’re describing, I’m assuming you haven’t based on how you’re describing it. My father was the “man of the house” breadwinner and was very domineering, but to say he was trying to “trap” my mother or abuse her (or us) is something everyone in our family would laugh at. My dads entire life revolves around making my mom happy. I barely knew him when I was little because of how much he worked, and he spent his weekends not golfing or drinking but do…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 09:22 PM
13

If there’s no such thing as a “standard” man or woman, why even talk about gender or dating to begin with? I think using this logic it’s pretty hard to have any conversation or comparison of two groups of anything
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 09:10 PM
9

In what world is the social expectation of approaching an advantage? It’s quite literally an informational disadvantage, you don’t know what kind of people find you attractive, you only know out of the people you approach.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 09:07 PM
1

Just don’t get married then?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/25 02:18 AM
2

If you are a 5, but you think you are an 8 (and deserve an 8) you are kind of objectively being too picky. If you are that same 5, and you think you are an 8, dating another 5 might feel like “settling”, but you’re actually dating within your league. These two ideas are not incompatible at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/25 02:17 AM
1

I agree with this post generally, but shouldn’t the focus be on creating a world where men have comparable options to women?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/25 09:39 PM
–

Your best example is the Freemasons? I think that kind of proves the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/25 01:33 PM
1

If you’re queer, how does feminism make it more dangerous for you? I’m not trying to be facetious, I’m genuinely curious
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/25 03:44 AM
1

When I was 19 I got shingles (attacks your nerves), I cried in pain over the phone as I was medically bedridden on opiates. My ex gf got the ick. I don’t even think I got to be vulnerable about my feelings yet in that relationship. My current gf actually encourages me to be vulnerable, I’m just so tired of women acting like other women aren’t capable of being shitty to men.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/25 03:41 AM
1

Are we just gonna act like women don’t have their own spaces? They literally go to gay bars to avoid straight men, so much so they annoy said gays
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/25 03:39 AM
1

I think that’s a very uncharitable view of it. I’d say a more realistic explanation of it is that there is a pretty severe information asymmetry between men and women regarding whether someone is into you. A lot of men have a lot of false positives because they don’t actually know what it’s like to have a woman approach/pursue them. I’m not trying to say I’m a chad or anything, but actually having been approached by women of their own volition has made it much easier for me to distinguish when a…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/25 02:18 AM
5

I agree, it’s a relatively small amount of feminists doing that. It’s up to WOMEN to tell those feminists that they are wrong and men approaching in particular ways are actually acceptable and wanted. Normal women should encourage normal men trying to be normal, and discourage misandrist women or misogynist men.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 04:09 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter