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HotAir25 Archive

View 2 posts and 202 comments by HotAir25 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
44

Field ReportHotAir25/r/seduction06/06/25 02:44 PM
0

Field ReportHotAir25/r/seduction09/09/24 07:19 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
130

Girls don’t care about age, a few care at 40 but even then most don’t. Go for it.
/r/seduction28/07/26 01:43 AM
13

Like some uncontrollable urge? Height, broad chest.
/r/seduction26/07/26 04:03 PM
0

Use AI subtly
/r/seduction25/07/26 12:23 AM
2

What’s been your nicest surprise about meeting more women? And any disappointing things you wised up to too?
/r/seduction23/07/26 11:40 PM
1

It’s weird it seems to not matter at all for some girls and for others immediately is a no. But part of this is just the obvious stuff that marks your age eg gray hair, I’ve had a lot more success with a cap on for instance. If you keep in shape and maybe try to hide graying hair I’d say you can still just as easily pull most 20 years if you want to.
/r/seduction23/07/26 07:31 PM
1

Girls know that if they show obvious signs they are with a guy (and it is serious) then other guys see their Instagram and don’t bother with them. So if she is not including a guy in any photos at all then there’s a reasonable chance she is available/open. Instagram is like Tinder, you don’t put a partner in the photos if you want to get interest. Only exceptions being the professional model types maybe. Tbf girls are also wary that a relationship might not work out too so they might not post a …
/r/seduction14/07/26 04:15 PM
1

So you honestly think the entire issue is something about your voice? Yeah I appreciate flirting can sound weird written down, but you already admitted it all goes wrong when you open your mouth so if it’s not the words specifically or something you can’t help like difficulty with eye contact like I have, then it’s the underlying vibe/feeling you’re communicating. Do you actually enjoy the conversations? Likely the girl doesn’t either if internally you are not enjoying it at some level. I know t…
/r/seduction12/07/26 03:15 PM
2

And also as feedback- ‘I appreciate your comment; unfortunately because of it I had to delete this post. It's going to turn this entire discussion into a pissing contest about autism.‘ This comes across as passive aggressive and a bit insincere. Just be a straightforward person with whichever girls you are approaching and they’ll like you more. People pick up the underlying feeling you’re communicating even if the words say otherwise.
/r/seduction12/07/26 02:34 PM
1

Also if you mentioned high pitched voice (was it?), voice tone can relate to things like vagus nerve tone- you can measure it with a fitness watch- it often means low heart rate variability. It also relates to social ease- it’s the nerve that helps us automatically respond socially with our throat, eyes, expressions. And it can be modulated over time with the right exercises, relationships can activate it too- look into vagus nerve activation, nervous system or somatic therapies. It’s a long ter…
/r/seduction12/07/26 02:18 PM
2

I think you just need to give more information about what you actually say to these girls and other people can give an opinion on the situation. It’s impossible to guess from they are attracted and you approach and it doesn’t work.
/r/seduction12/07/26 11:54 AM
5

Mate, about half the people on Reddit including me are mildly autistic- can’t make good eye contact when speaking, struggle to think of right thing to say. Not saying you are but I related to your post, girls pick up on it immediately.
/r/seduction12/07/26 01:19 AM
10

A few possibilities- You misunderstood why they were looking back- it’s always quite hard to read signals as they are ambiguous by nature. There’s also the horny effect where we naturally over interpret signals from people we find especially attractive. Or girls are put off by something in your chat/approach. I have something similar, used to model so get a lot of ‘looks’ but am a bit autistic so when I approach girls notice the poor eye contact and many will shut me down immediately even after …
/r/seduction11/07/26 09:51 AM
17

Sometimes they are just being polite. They also have so many options that they can be picky. If they want to have sex just like that it’s pretty easy for any attractive girl.
/r/seduction11/07/26 09:42 AM
1

The funny thing is that girls in relationships will do things you wouldn’t expect like often girls with a guy will notice I’m checking her out and smile back at me, or even check me out several times, all whilst with a guy at the time who hasn’t noticed. I know maybe they just like the attention but I swear these girls could be seduced too. Have you ever had experience of that?
/r/seduction09/07/26 09:13 PM
0

Does it work though? I really like Manson, he’s obviously smart and a nice guy who uses philosophy to great effect. I don’t know, my sense is that self help makes you feel better at the moment of reading it and that’s the main value of it, but I hope people find bigger effects on their lives.
/r/seduction08/07/26 11:09 PM
3

No idea. But a good rule of thumb I heard was that if a girl likes you then she’ll create less distance and make it easier. But if they are younger or shy that might mean briefly passing you without looking and things like that- some girls follow these not acting first rules religiously even if they are very attracted. Generally best to follow simple rules, if a girl avoids you or gives very mixed signals then she is either uninterested or in a relationship.
/r/seduction08/07/26 10:50 PM
2

There actually is a fine line as you say, in the end it’s about how it’s received. I’m autistic and struggle to be verbal if I like a girl, so when I hover near a girl and don’t speak even if the girl fancies me she can interpret it badly eventually. Occasionally I’ve had mutual crushes on neighbours and we’ve walked past each other on purpose to see if we would chat and neither party minds, but if you do this with a girl two roads away it could be perceived as something worse because it’s less …
/r/seduction04/07/26 02:18 AM
1

Yeah I see. I don’t know it all just seems like overkill but if it works for some people that’s great. I’m mildly autistic and having a wingman immediately led to me sleeping with someone- even though she was bothered by my lack of chat, she fancied me amd wanted to meet again- but having a neurotypical person there to make easy conversation made all of the difference- not sure this can be learnt though as it’s a core symptom of autism not like a script you can just learn. Still 17 lays can’t be…
/r/seduction29/06/26 04:26 PM
2

Yeah makes sense. But realistically 4k approaches and 0.5% conversion just shows how difficult it is if you’re neurodivergent, exposure does make you learn things but you can’t entirely overcome a generalised difficulty with communication.
/r/seduction29/06/26 04:13 PM
5

What’s the outcome or goals for you in 50 per week? 4k is beyond anything I would ever consider tbh, I get maybe 1 meaningful look back per day and I’d just like to act on that.
/r/seduction29/06/26 03:54 PM
19

4k approaches leading to 17 lays? Half a percentage point conversion. Good for you. Now I know why my 5 approaches a year aren’t working out 😂
/r/seduction29/06/26 02:50 PM
2

Probably you have great pictures to do well with the apps. Do you include pics of your body? I get the sense that’s quite important. In nightclubs…..you can meet very beautiful women there, I prefer studenty places or gay clubs- otherwise you end up in a place which is mostly guys and the few women are tapped up quickly- gay clubs it’s the opposite, girls out number guys in some places- and sometimes you get the best looking girls there because they get hassled too much in straight clubs.
/r/seduction26/06/26 11:55 PM
33

Apps are the worst way for men to meet people, unless you have crazy good photos or are looking for something more serious on Hinge. Easiest I find is nightclubs with young people but that won’t work for everyone.
/r/seduction26/06/26 07:53 PM
22

Tell me about the time it worked.
/r/seduction20/06/26 07:43 PM
1

Well if you’ve shown clear interest via eye contact- and the girl then makes more than one attempt to give you an opportunity to talk to her- going out of her way to wait or pass by your machine then it becomes clear and there’s not much risk of bothering someone who is taken or uninterested. Sorry this is useless advice, you already know this, I just meant girls will do this if they actively want to be chatted to. It’s easier to tell if you’ve seen the girl more than once and she def knows you’…
/r/seduction17/06/26 09:37 PM
1

Girls will show if they are attracted or interested before you speak to them- so that’s one way of filtering in these contexts.
/r/seduction17/06/26 03:42 PM
2

Girls often don’t want to leave their friends I find even if you do make out. But I often find if you get a number then it can lead to an easy hook up after if friends was the only complication the next night or week.
/r/seduction12/06/26 01:00 AM
-1

You mean it’s harder at night as needs to be fast, and takes more practise?
/r/seduction12/06/26 12:28 AM
3

Not sure if this applies, but I’ve noticed girls hate that type of meaningless small talk stuff- some like you to suggest a date immediately….a girl mate of mine immediately got a date for me on my tinder by seeing the girl didn’t like alcohol and saying ‘wanna go mini golf with mocktails?’ and the girl agreed, I probably would have wasted time with more small talk. So just say what you mean and go for a date.
/r/seduction04/06/26 08:31 PM
4

Haha, yeah it’s true- I guess some people bald and that’s tough luck and most drink or eat too much and get a belly, but I found it easy to not age much tbh- the hair turns grey but not much else changes tbh and girls don’t mind that- it’s almost easier to pull at 40 than 20 tbh and you get older women interested too. 26 is prime, enjoy! I’m happy for you.
/r/seduction03/06/26 02:13 AM
23

No just enjoy yourself, life is journey you don’t need to skip a stage in fact normally it’s better not to skip a stage. 26 is insanely young, I’m 40 and in a similar type of position to you, maybe I’ll be forced to skip a stage to focus on starting a family but that’s because I’m 40 and not 26. 26 is prime young age- you only start to actually show your age mid 30s onwards so enjoy being young.
/r/seduction03/06/26 01:45 AM
2

This happens to me too, I think it’s just that attractive women are more used to the attention and that women are good at picking up on real interest and mirror your interest back- it’s just a natural human instinct. Unfortunately it often means- I like the attention as much as I’m actively interested, so proximity seeking tends to be the best signal.
/r/seduction02/06/26 04:21 PM
1

Yeah lol, I understood your comment.
/r/seduction29/05/26 07:09 PM
1

Well yeah there’s that.
/r/seduction29/05/26 06:49 PM
1

If only it were to do with appearance not looking in someone’s eyes…. For me it’s mild autism, literally impossible to look in the eyes for more than a few seconds- it’s horrible not being able to look and smile to a girl you like. I suspect a lot of people on Reddit are similar.
/r/seduction24/05/26 07:45 PM
96

I’m the same as you, I only realised in the last few years that you have to let the girl know you’re interested with eye contact- that’s literally the first stage of anything happening and if the girl is single it’s generally exactly what they want.
/r/seduction23/05/26 11:21 PM
4

I’m your age and I’ve never noticed women caring about my age yet. Sure you can’t expect every 20 year old not to care, if that’s your thing, but most don’t seem to- it depends how you look ultimately.
/r/seduction22/05/26 12:25 AM
1

Yeah could be- I once gave a girl my number I was too shy to speak and she actually called and arranged a date…. but then I arrived and told her something about how I’d gotten the wrong bar earlier and it was funny because I was psyching myself up to go in only to find out it was the wrong place….and I got the sense this level of unconfidence was a complete turn off. So yeah shy is ok, lack of confidence maybe not then, dang
/r/seduction18/05/26 10:48 AM
1

AI is great- watch out a lot of women’s profiles are all AI too! I used AI to create ideal activities like cooking, sports, and adding body shots I didn’t have- slightly worried now though as it makes me look more well built than I actually am! 😂 Honestly give it a try, women are so picky I think it’s fair to have a bit of help as long as you don’t overdo it.
/r/seduction18/05/26 09:21 AM
2

Yeah, I mean confidence generally is earnt- real- it’s because you have a real social skill- it can’t really be imitated and I guess that’s where a lot of coaching stuff falls down. I have a friend who is good looking and confident but he also has somewhat poor social skills and is a bit unaware of others feelings- so he kisses a lot of girls in clubs but that’s about it, they get rid of him or he gets kicked out of the club for bothering girls. Confidence has to reflect a real social value. You…
/r/seduction18/05/26 02:27 AM
1

I used to regularly have girls give me the clearest signals- staring at me, pausing next to me, walking in to me… Because I’m shy I’d just say ‘hey could I get your number?’ and everytime the lingering girl would say no, maybe even laugh. I thought ‘oh she wasn’t interested’ and then I realised it was my lack of chat, bad chat, bad eye contact etc, and they’d just changed their minds immediately when I approached them. Not saying this is you but girls change their minds immediately even if they …
/r/seduction18/05/26 12:10 AM
3

I’m a good looking guy who is very shy- I regularly get very hot women chasing after me even though they know I’m shy….the point being they are interested because they find me attractive and they’ve worked out I’m attracted and the fact that I’m not confident is not a turn off at all- it might even be a turn on that a guy is being sincere… I’m not saying lack of confidence is a good thing, but in my experience women don’t really care about confidence by itself.
/r/seduction17/05/26 05:55 PM
1

Not even shirtless- I just had only included face pics- I actually asked AI to turn a face pic into a cycling pic with my body and that turned my profile around immediately. I did see a guys profile on another app and he had pic showing his muscles, pic showing he had nice teeth, pic with a dog etc- like a tick box of things girls tend to like- so I guess I’m only a beginner with all of this.
/r/seduction17/05/26 05:46 PM
3

You certainly don’t need a good body for a relationship… But if you look at the hottest girls they are often with guys with broad chests and for some girls it’s fairly important for their attraction. I added body shots to my tinder and my matches improved x5-10 after years of thinking I had great face pics and a note to say I’m over 6ft…girls and guys are pretty similar in liking nice bodies.
/r/seduction17/05/26 11:17 AM
6

I guess one thing to consider is- if the guy is shy, he might appreciate you making more moves…..but if he doesn’t appear to be shy then maybe he’s not interested enough and then just wait to see if he makes an effort or move on.
/r/seduction16/05/26 05:59 PM
53

One bit of eye contact can be random but if a girl seems to look back again it’s more meaningful. Girls hovering near you is about the most a girl will do normally.
/r/seduction11/05/26 04:38 PM
1

Nice one man, I hope I can enter this world 😂
/r/seduction10/05/26 02:22 PM
1

Haha. Any advice with married women? How do you test if they are available?
/r/seduction10/05/26 02:13 PM
1

Yeah that’s what I’ve found. One dumb thing I did for years was include no body shots, I didn’t have any so I used AI- immediately I got x10 likes and girls saying stuff like ‘I love your hands’, and I realised the AI had given me extra large hands…. Anyway, use AI a tiny bit to enhance, include body shots, include friends and an activity.
/r/seduction08/05/26 12:33 AM
2

Questions can be a way of avoiding ourselves a bit- if you can bring some of yourself or humour as well as taking an interest in her that would be better.
/r/seduction04/05/26 12:39 PM
1

As a good looking guy with autism I can tell you- you get a lot of initial interest with looks, almost everytime I leave the house I get several ‘interested’ looks. But with no chat that becomes no interest. In a group of friends when we are out, girls go for me everytime- I get selected on looks for sure over the other guys. So yeah looks matter and help you get your foot in the door, but in the end personality and chat are the majority. When I look at 10/10 hot girls with their partners, gener…
/r/seduction02/05/26 06:53 PM
3

I’m no expert but you need to understand subtext- what someone isn’t literally saying to you but actually feels underneath- You went home with a girl, had a nice time, she didn’t want to have sex and gave a reason (which may have been true or an excuse). You texted her and she kept saying she was too busy to meet or even ‘lol’ at you getting an std test. This is someone who didn’t want to have sex and doesn’t want to meet again and their actions and words were consistent. Maybe she was telling t…
/r/seduction01/05/26 11:12 AM
8

OP thinks him getting an std test (as she seemed to imply) would lead to another meet up and sex….hes mentioning it because he thinks he fulfilled his end of the ‘bargain’ and she didn’t by ghosting him. He took her words (which may have an excuse) and the situation (a one night stand) too literally and seriously. Maybe others are right and he could have converted it later, but in my experience girls often go home with you and then make up an excuse not to have sex, and even if you do they mostl…
/r/seduction01/05/26 02:51 AM
1

Well I guess either she changed her mind which happens a lot or you needed to test if it was some face saving?
/r/seduction23/07/25 05:09 PM
1

I’m not sure if I understand your final line, you couldn’t have got laid with her because was sick by the time you got home.
/r/seduction20/07/25 06:08 PM
3

I have a similar issue and I realised I have autism, so yeah I can get some interest and friends but I lack the communication and depth of feeling & fun to be truly accepted. Only thing that has worked is dating ND people, and slowly trying to improve my autism with vagus nerve exercises/stimulation. I don’t know if this resonates with you?
/r/seduction19/07/25 11:16 AM
1

You can, very slowly, improve your facial expressions and voice by trying to exercise or stimulate your vagus nerve, it’s what determines this behaviour and is not very active with autists. That said this is a very long term solution but I do recommend it from experience. Maybe force a smile when you speak to a girl at first, it can be off putting if you don’t smile when you first meet them.
/r/seduction16/07/25 02:43 PM
5

Thanks man, I really appreciate your advice. I often freeze at the point where a hot girl is smiling at me because I’m thinking she will reject me when she speaks to me, but as you say half the battle has been won, perhaps. And it’s focusing on feelings, and the FORD method. Thanks man.
/r/seduction11/07/25 09:07 PM
2

lol, good for you. I literally can’t think of shit to say and it feels like too much effort. Which is a shame because I have hot girls interested every so often, I need that script lol.
/r/seduction11/07/25 08:30 PM
1

Are you in that position? Does it actually work? Presumably not for relationships, but I guess for that night?
/r/seduction11/07/25 08:21 PM
-2

You probably used the word autism in jest, but is it actually possible to date with autism? My assumption and experience is probably not, despite looks, no chat = she won’t like you (?)
/r/seduction11/07/25 08:14 PM
2

Thanks, this was a great post that’s resonated with me approaching mid life and having ballsed up a brilliant opportunity with a girl because I thought she the ‘one’, couldn’t be a worse way to start out with a girl. As you say, enjoy life as it comes that’s all.
/r/seduction18/06/25 11:46 PM
10

Therapy can work, but the key is to find someone you really connect with- it’s the relationship that heals you. The other thing no one tells you, even your therapist, is that your trauma is in your nervous system, that’s why it’s hard to shift. So try to find out ways to get your vagus nerve more active (you can see how good yours is by using a fitness watch and looking at HRV) which is responsible for relaxing us enough for proper sociability and giving us a flexible nervous system. There’s a w…
/r/seduction18/06/25 01:52 AM
0

Yeah it’s so hard isn’t it? I’m a little autistic so I can barely even make eye contact at the right points tbh, you’re not alone. It’s worth taking the risk though if you can- bet you’re lovely when you open up- do it!!
/r/seduction16/06/25 05:01 PM
158

I’ve unintentionally played this game my whole life as an incredibly shy person….girls occasionally work out that I fancy them and it drives them crazy trying to get me whilst I avoid them and never directly let them know I like them. This isn’t a good long term strategy, never really progressing things, but it proves the principal that you just imply you like them but never say it.
/r/seduction15/06/25 07:31 PM
3

I danced with a fit girl in a club and I asked if I could kiss her to be respectful and she walked off, lol. Just don’t ask.
/r/seduction14/06/25 11:19 AM
3

That’s ok though, she’s effectively single!
/r/seduction13/06/25 12:31 AM
1

Haha, hmmmm
/r/seduction12/06/25 10:34 PM
1

Just set some up with the timer on your phone so it’s not a selfie and figure out a good expression? It’s tough, I use photos from years ago as only good ones so I know what you mean!
/r/seduction08/06/25 10:54 PM
1

There are some videos on YouTube of girls talking about what they want in photos. Def good to show- good teeth, muscles, friends and activities but in a non showy way so no obvious selfies etc.
/r/seduction08/06/25 10:50 PM
1

Chill. It was just a question, I’m autistic so chatting girls up isn’t something I set high expectations for myself on, I was just curious. I think she was a nanny in retrospect.
/r/seduction08/06/25 11:14 AM
1

Nobody owns somebody else. But Im not advocating it of course.
/r/seduction07/06/25 03:53 PM
1

Thanks for the heads up. Yeah makes sense!
/r/seduction07/06/25 02:36 PM
3

Haha, ok lesson learnt. You’ve reminded me that a friends parent was once shot in the ass, I believe, as he escaped from an affair with a married woman! Certainly forbidden fruit haha
/r/seduction07/06/25 12:20 PM
2

I don’t claim to have game. I was just asking a question about why a married woman would respond to a man’s interest as it confused me. In retrospect I think she was a nanny.
/r/seduction07/06/25 08:27 AM
-2

Well I wouldn’t want to be an idiot by ‘fully’ around with a married woman.
/r/seduction07/06/25 08:19 AM
6

The milkman always rings twice is what this made me think of lol.
/r/seduction07/06/25 12:48 AM
2

Haha. So married women do like to have little affairs? Honestly I’m so naive that’s why I’m asking. She was fine.
/r/seduction07/06/25 12:24 AM
2

Yeah I think about 16% admit to it and 30% of men do. So likely it’s much higher as you say. This just got interesting.
/r/seduction07/06/25 12:01 AM
1

Good one.
/r/seduction06/06/25 11:49 PM
-1

People do all sorts of risky things sexually, it’s not necessarily because they don’t have other options, personally I’m driven by who I find attractive and whether it’s mutual, and then you go from there.
/r/seduction06/06/25 10:01 PM
-4

lol, the morality police have many faces.
/r/seduction06/06/25 09:52 PM
2

What was the ‘heavy consequence’ to borrow a term?!
/r/seduction06/06/25 08:38 PM
4

Thanks, I’ll look it up, they are so different to us, it’s really a learning curve!
/r/seduction06/06/25 08:19 PM
3

Thanks for being frank. This is true!
/r/seduction06/06/25 08:11 PM
7

Yeah I guess that’s true. Why is this? Girls are more sensitive to social stuff generally maybe. It’s tough as an autistic male because rejection and new people are especially difficult for us. I’ve had girls sticking their boobs in my face or chasing after me for the tenth time, I still can’t speak first if I really like the person.
/r/seduction06/06/25 08:02 PM
-4

Haha. A few people have alluded to that. I can believe this but I don’t think the risk of an affair leading to murder is that high. But of course it would be horrible to realise this.
/r/seduction06/06/25 07:59 PM
2

Respect to who?
/r/seduction06/06/25 07:56 PM
0

I mean, snap, is that the game we are playing now?
/r/seduction06/06/25 07:54 PM
7

Yeah I’m sure you’re right. I’m not in the US or going to bars, I meant just in day to day life the rule is girls stand nearby but don’t speak first.
/r/seduction06/06/25 07:48 PM
3

Cheers, yes this was my guess, just some harmless flirting.
/r/seduction06/06/25 06:22 PM
2

Touched a nerve. I apologise.
/r/seduction06/06/25 06:06 PM
-1

I meant, the woman herself. It’s just patronising to assume a guy has completely misunderstood, especially when you’re not in the situation so it’s just your preconceptions you’re airing.
/r/seduction06/06/25 06:04 PM
-11

Maybe men don’t look at you? But yeah it’s pretty standard when they do and they are interested that they approach you stand nearby to see if you chat to them.
/r/seduction06/06/25 05:53 PM
7

We can be here all night you re-writing me saying I have some responsibility as zero. I’m not sure why people try to make strong claims about others internal states online, you’re making an impossible claim. I’m just stating a fact that I have less commitment to someone else’s relationship or partner, than they do….that seems obvious.
/r/seduction06/06/25 05:22 PM
7

Good point :)
/r/seduction06/06/25 05:15 PM
-1

I don’t think that. But I do think some of the replies sound sexist, ‘another man’s territory’, or implying she has no will in this matter. An attractive woman responded to me checking her out, I guess I was curious about what that would mean if she was married, maybe she just wanted to feel attractive or was bored, I assume it was just that tbh.
/r/seduction06/06/25 05:06 PM
2

Thanks for sharing! Yes my impression is that people are much more complicated than we give them credit for. I assume most don’t cheat but some will, maybe at specific ages more. It’s interesting to discover and not have preconceptions in life.
/r/seduction06/06/25 05:01 PM
147

Girls never make the first move, but they tend to give you opportunities to do that by walking across you, standing next to you etc. They will never risk rejection but they will do a lot of standing next to you.
/r/seduction06/06/25 04:52 PM
-1

I think it’s more her responsibility than mine. I’m single and I don’t know her situation. But yes in a hypothetical scenario where I’m about to sleep with a married woman, I would consider the ethical responsibility of that as clearly I would take part in that. I don’t know what I would do, it would probably depend on what she said about how it might affect her later. This is all hypothetical though.
/r/seduction06/06/25 04:50 PM
3

Someone else in another seduction thread just now said they’ve slept with several married women and they were in open marriages. I’m not here to mess with someone else’s life, I just noticed an attractive woman giving me a little opportunity to speak to her, that’s it. I suspect she was bored or curious.
/r/seduction06/06/25 04:47 PM
5

I should have checked for a ring. In my experience many women with kids are single, I’m a teacher so I see it first hand. The woman saw me checking her out and then by coincidence I walked her way later and she saw me turned around and walked back and stood 2m from me. I don’t know whether she wanted more than just a little flirt but it was fairly clear.
/r/seduction06/06/25 04:44 PM
3

If she messaged you first, she’s interested. Message her back. Girls often say they have a bf when they don’t, that’s their normal polite turn down, but maybe she was a little on the fence when she said that and she’s opening the door by messaging you. She may not have a bf so you can just see…
/r/seduction06/06/25 04:27 PM
2

Thanks for the advice!
/r/seduction06/06/25 04:12 PM
1

Yeah I should have done. I’m a little autistic so I tend to get into these situations a lot where a girl notices me looking and waits and waits etc.
/r/seduction06/06/25 04:11 PM
0

I literally said it was a bit of both and then you’ve said I claim zero responsibility?
/r/seduction06/06/25 04:08 PM
2

Can you unpack what you mean? I’m a little autistic so maybe I don’t understand some fundamental thing here.
/r/seduction06/06/25 04:07 PM
3

Sorry this is all so sexist. A mom is less desirable because she’s a mom? Sloppy seconds? Are we at school? She was my age, about 40. She was beautiful. I don’t know her situation. Maybe desires are more complicated than someone being a mum or whatnot.
/r/seduction06/06/25 04:03 PM
-26

Does the woman have a say in this whole situation? I’m curious.
/r/seduction06/06/25 03:54 PM
-21

Well there’s such a thing as being truthful to your desires, not at any cost but they can be explored, tested out, perhaps a woman can test out theirs too. I just saw an attractive woman and she responded me to looking that’s all, I would feel a dilemma if she was married and I might ruin that of course. I would probably ask her to think again before acting in that case I expect.
/r/seduction06/06/25 03:53 PM
4

Thanks! The comments feel borderline sexist and old fashioned to me. Probably not based on life experience.
/r/seduction06/06/25 03:41 PM
10

Thanks! This is the most helpful answer to me particularly regarding women acting in the moment on emotions. I don’t appreciate that nuance as I’m a little autistic, women tend to respond to my interest but I don’t anyways know what to do with it.
/r/seduction06/06/25 03:36 PM
-7

Another man’s territory just sounds very sexist to me. She’s a person with her own volition. Obviously no one would want to cause a divorce, that’s not the only outcome of a woman looking for some attention.
/r/seduction06/06/25 03:28 PM
-59

I’m just curious why everyone here is being pious. Maybe her husband is having an affair? Maybe it’s an open marriage? Maybe she is capable of making a decision about what she wants? I just find it potentially quite patronising and sexist to think a woman can’t make a decision like this if they want to.
/r/seduction06/06/25 03:17 PM
-45

Life just feels more complicated than this. Maybe her husband is having an affair? Who knows. You don’t think it’s her responsibility? Surely it’s a bit of both.
/r/seduction06/06/25 03:09 PM
12

True that. So you think married women are sometimes open to an affair? Apparently about 20% admit to or probably have had one so it’s not too unlikely.
/r/seduction06/06/25 03:02 PM
3

I don’t know for sure, true. Often women with kids in poor areas are single, I’ve found that working in schools. But generally in very rich areas, like mine, it’s not that likely- it’s very hard to live in this area without someone working to support the wife and kid being off during the daytime as she was. Slight chance she wasn’t but I was just curious the implications for if she was married. I figure it was attention but I don’t know.
/r/seduction06/06/25 03:00 PM
-60

True, being pushy would be unethical but it’s also up the other person to decide, it’s not entirely my responsibility.
/r/seduction06/06/25 02:57 PM
9

If they are playing with their necklace it is normally seen as a sigh of nervous excitement and a very positive sign. But if they have one hand held across their body holding their wrist it could be some more defensive or self soothing. You should be able to gauge from their facial expressions though.
/r/seduction02/06/25 09:02 PM
11

Supppsedly you can be at your peak attractiveness around your age, and again later in your twenties. But as a man, you can be attractive to most women until 40s, I’ve found that I get more or less the same attention at 40 as at 30 but I definitely looked better before.
/r/seduction29/05/25 10:41 PM
1

So this girl I was describing in my post who I went on a date with, the first sign of interest was that she looked down and fiddled with her hair when she passed me in a club, she looked shy….luckily I saw her again and it was clear she fancied me from her looking at me and giving me a chance to speak to her. So you’re not wrong, sometimes girls will avert their eyes from interest if they are shy It’s all about context and where you are- generally girls don’t want random guys to approach them on…
/r/seduction14/05/25 12:36 AM
1

I just wonder if cold approaches are the problem, especially without signs of interest. I saw a girl out the other day and she looked slightly shyly at me, then I overheard her friend say ‘yeah he’s hot’, so I said a few things to her, got her number which she gave enthusiastically, we texted, she kept showing signs of interest, went on a date and to be honest I struggled to maintain her interest in me with my chat so back to square one, but it was clear what the issue was. If you cold approach …
/r/seduction13/05/25 11:56 PM
8

This is great advice, thank you. I always wondered about types of photos- I have somewhat model photos of my face but only get so so matches (very different story in real life- I’ve had several women smile at me on a short walk etc). Sounds like I need to get those muscles (which don’t exist out) and some absurd photo of me doing the dishes whilst paragliding or whatever. Is it important to show your height too? I only have face photos and I was curious if girls thought I was hiding my height (I…
/r/seduction06/05/25 02:20 PM
0

Pretty bitchy for a straight guy huh ;)
/r/seduction06/05/25 09:48 AM
18

I’m probably not the right person to help you here but are these women you approach giving any signs of interest beforehand?
/r/seduction05/05/25 02:48 PM
12

Fair enough. In my limited experience, bad sex and losing physical interest can be a sign to end the relationship, and looking elsewhere is normally the best sign it’s over. But I remember a friend at work who was a ladies man, muscular body, tall, funny, confident etc. he referred to not being in a relationship but having lots of women who he was sleeping with, probably many of them wanted a relationship with him but understood what they had with him was not monogamous. In a way it was like hav…
/r/seduction04/05/25 01:15 AM
9

Yeah my impression is that a lot of men who are good at seduction have a harem of women they call on. I’m not sure why you’re getting lots of moralistic responses otherwise, you didn’t say you were in an exclusive relationship, or even in a relationship.
/r/seduction03/05/25 11:00 PM
1

Reading between the lines a bit it sounds like Neil and perhaps the others are/were neurodivergent chaos who were masking their true selves in order to get laid and appear normal, but that could only last so long.
/r/seduction03/05/25 01:22 AM
13

I hope to experience your manshood one day.
/r/seduction02/05/25 10:55 PM
2

The tactics seem a bit silly or like they might only work on young, insecure women at a party or something. But the story itself and subculture is fascinating!
/r/seduction02/05/25 12:35 AM
1

I know what you mean though, attractive girls are sort of more secure about things and easier to approach in some ways, I think that’s true.
/r/seduction30/04/25 01:33 PM
16

I know what you mean but I don’t think there is any pattern to it really. More intelligent people tend to be kinder though. I meant that if a girl is unkind about turning you down then in some ways you never really want that type of girl anyway as kindness is part of someone being attractive. The times I’ve regretted a girl was when they were sort of nice about it not when they acted all superior and haughty.
/r/seduction30/04/25 01:08 PM
46

Often the girls who reject in an unpleasant way are just unattractive people and it doesn’t matter at that point.
/r/seduction30/04/25 12:57 PM
2

In my experience you are young until about 35 and then you’re starting to enter middle age. This seems like a genuine marker point since our ability to have kids becomes harder after 35, including for men, and sports stars often can’t continue at the top at this age either in intense sports. This does depend on diet though, a girl in a club asked me how I was still thin at 35 and I looked around and sure enough most of the other men had bellies etc. The girl thought it was natural to have one. Y…
/r/seduction15/04/25 12:07 AM
1

If she’s flashing her fanny at you especially aggressively, not in a friendly way.
/r/seduction13/04/25 11:22 PM
2

Humble bragging. He’s right though, the main apps mostly seem to result in matching girls below my league.
/r/seduction11/04/25 05:32 PM
0

I would guess it’s highly unlikely that she was going for a threesome tbh (but you can find that on Feeld app). Some people are just touchy feely and it doesn’t mean anything more. But you approached after getting a signal so sounds positive for next time you go to a club.
/r/seduction06/04/25 03:54 PM
2

Girls do make those kinds of signals, a small touch on your back etc. as a ‘I’m interested but you need to approach me’ type thing. But I would assume you were mistaken somehow if I later saw the same couple kissing, maybe it was someone else who touched you or they were just trying to get past and let you know they were there. OR you missed your chance and they had only just met at the club and were now getting together for the first time. I remember dancing next to a hot girl who looked intere…
/r/seduction06/04/25 03:47 PM
1

You only slightly start to lose your looks late 30s, and then can still look great until 50 or so. I get more interest at 40 than at 20 by a long shot. But I do worry that I will be over the hill in another 10 years.
/r/seduction05/04/25 06:51 PM
1

If you’re getting looks then I think it’s absolutely the way to go. It’s just some people being a bit puritanical or assuming everyone is a nerd or a perv that recommend not approaching at the gym. If a girl is interested in you then it’s fine.
/r/seduction03/04/25 03:45 PM
5

Ignore all of the puritans, yeah of course people check each other out at the gym, and exchange numbers and things like that. Obviously you just need to wait to get a good signal, often I check a girl out and then she will start working out next to me or smiling, making eye contact. Obviously girls also find it annoying to be checked out endlessly or if they are already attached, but it’s the same as any other situation if someone is unattached and finds you attractive…
/r/seduction28/03/25 05:25 PM
14

Most people just become attached and in love and then it’s not about strategising about what else there is. It’s not a rational choice but an emotional one.
/r/seduction02/02/25 01:38 PM
1

One can’t just BE an asshole, it takes many years of dedication.
/r/seduction21/12/24 12:23 PM
96

Someone once told me about girl approach anxiety that he just assumes he’s already messed it up already and that relaxes him to be himself. So you could apply that maybe?
/r/seduction15/12/24 11:21 AM
9

No, and it’s good to strike while the iron is hot so go for it.
/r/seduction13/12/24 09:20 PM
1

It can be hard to know but generally girls will try to give you the opportunity to chat them up if they fancy you- So they will stand near you or walk past you; separate from their friends to give an opportunity to chat alone; make eye contact (although they will often not want to put themselves out there so many will just stand nearby and not look at you); touch their bodies and hair (girls often touch their boobs I’ve noticed). I normally let a girl know I’m interested by looking and then seei…
/r/seduction12/12/24 04:10 PM
113

Not even late 20s, your 30s or late 30s, none of these times are too late. If you take care of yourself, girls will be interested in you, and if anything you have a broader range of women interested too.
/r/seduction10/12/24 11:10 AM
35

Yeah most girls are put off if they think you’re alone….i presume because you have no social proof that you’re a social, non threatening person (?). Personally I would lie….my friend had to leave early, or met a girl…. Not sure what the best thing is to say but I wouldn’t admit to being out alone. Not all girls care, but quite a few seem to and I’ve had hot girls decide to not go home with me when they or their friend realised I was out alone.
/r/seduction05/12/24 08:51 PM
1

100% that’s what girls do, so it can be easy to tell if a girl is single or not dating seriously yet.
/r/seduction30/11/24 10:05 AM
2

From what you’ve said it sounds almost certain as if this girl is interested in you (or her friend is!), your intuitions are normally right, you’ll regret it more if you don’t take the chance…
/r/seduction20/11/24 07:41 PM
1

Fair play, like most things in life it’s about how you say something. Sounds like you are having some good nights out.
/r/seduction16/11/24 09:10 PM
1

How do you explain to girls that you’re by yourself? I’ve had a girl who was going to go home with me reject me because I was by myself and I think it made her or her friend worry about safety (perhaps), so I’m inclined to lie now. Actually happened more than once that a girl lost interest at that point.
/r/seduction16/11/24 06:15 PM
1

Yeah I can believe that.
/r/seduction09/11/24 01:12 PM
3

You normally need to have kissed a bit during the date to get her to say yes to going back, otherwise it’s a sudden escalation. Not always like you say but it helps.
/r/seduction09/11/24 10:30 AM
1

Haha, turns out I didn’t know what a rusty trombone was, I’ll have to request it at some point.
/r/seduction08/11/24 06:08 PM
1

Try tromboning (look it up).
/r/seduction08/11/24 04:45 PM
8

What do you have to lose by contacting her? As you say, decent chance she won’t reply as it was a night out and other things were happening anyway but you don’t really have anything to lose and you need that attitude to succeed with women.
/r/seduction08/11/24 02:53 PM
0

What’s the problem- you can’t open up? Or feel like you’re too different? Honestly therapy was the best I ever did at your age, you’re paying someone to listen and understand you no matter what, it’s not hard to open up in that setting!
/r/seduction08/11/24 12:28 AM
0

Have you ever considered talk therapy? It’s a good way to learn how to open up with people but in a safe, controlled environment.
/r/seduction08/11/24 12:16 AM
2

Certainly if you don’t smile girls will freak out. I get a lot of positive attention from girls but I tend not to smile and their interest sometimes morphs into a slightly scared look in that case. You need to smile!
/r/seduction06/11/24 12:47 PM
13

This is all good advice. You can sometimes set up a booty call for later as often girls won’t want to abandon their friend/friends on that particular night to go home with a guy, so you do all of the above but set up a booty call for next night or next week.
/r/seduction03/11/24 02:16 PM
2

Oh sorry, I can’t teach you how to better looking, I didn’t mean to get your hopes up.
/r/seduction31/10/24 02:47 PM
3

Only works if you’re good looking of course.
/r/seduction31/10/24 02:02 PM
5

Young women wearing revealing clothing are hands down the most likely to respond to any interest you show in them vs any other women. They are 100% looking for attention. I’m sure it varies for all women why they dress the way they do. But very revealing clothes tend to be worn to catch men’s eyes.
/r/seduction31/10/24 12:44 PM
3

It’s amazing how it does work with these women though, by chance I was acting like an asshole when I was a kid and drunk, and two girls from my school, both insecure, propositioned me that same evening, one followed me into the toilets! Stupidly I was too young to act on it, but it was curious ti see!
/r/seduction30/10/24 07:29 PM
1

Good point, yeah I don’t know either. I went to a board game club the other day and everyone there looked ND but I know how you feel.
/r/seduction26/10/24 10:12 PM
3

It’s normally fairly easy for ND people to get on with and or date other ND people. My longest relationship, in fact all of my relationships, were with ND people/alternative types. It’s just tricky to relate perfectly to someone who experiences things differently.
/r/seduction26/10/24 10:10 AM
12

I always assume girls looking for ‘friends’ are girls who want to see how much of a connection you have before going for a relationship, but maybe some are actually looking for friends!
/r/seduction24/10/24 03:31 PM
1

I think they are all the same tbh- was using just for men but had to use a women’s brand was even better as came with a brush to apply easier. Only advice is- get dark brown not black (unless you’re dark skinned), and apply to the roots carefully it’s easy to miss bits, wash off skin fairly quickly if it gets on forehead etc. lots of videos on YouTube.
/r/seduction24/10/24 09:18 AM
8

Agreed, get a good haircut (probably for most medium length) and if it’s going grey, dye it- takes 10 mins and makes the biggest difference to your look- actually I’d recommend dying even if not grey yet, just to a stronger look- dark not light brown etc.
/r/seduction23/10/24 10:43 AM
3

Try not to take personally, in the first case the girl just didn’t want to leave her friends/the night yet and possibly was dropping a hint for to come, and the second case she didn’t want to be a slut….in neither case did the girl not like you, but you just needed to consider it from a girls perspective and give them options. In both cases you probably could have just got their numbers for another time. Girls often won’t want to leave their friends but are happy to hook up the next day when the…
/r/seduction22/10/24 09:42 AM
1

I said something along the lines of ‘you’re the most stunning girl, have we met before?’ to a girl on insta who I’d seen (but not yet matched) on tinder…she was smitten…this girl was 10/10 but in her 40s so maybe a little keener than someone younger would have been. So yeah it could work to go straight to the point but my instinct would be to build up a bit.
/r/seduction07/10/24 10:16 PM
1

Is there anyway to tell which girls are more likely to be DTF like that?
/r/seduction06/10/24 04:27 PM
1

Yeah I’m curious about this too, I recently heard that Insta is the new way people advertise themselves for dating, but not sure how to chat someone up online!
/r/seduction06/10/24 04:11 PM
0

I tend to ignore girls because I’m shy and honestly it drives them wild inadvertently, it’s bizarre! I don’t know about how you maintain that on a date, maybe it works like you said. For some girls acting like an arrogant guy also drives them wild but that just tends to be the insecure girls.
/r/seduction05/10/24 01:12 PM
1

I tend to ignore girls because I’m shy and honestly it drives them wild inadvertently, it’s bizarre! I don’t know about how you maintain that on a date, maybe it works like you said. For some girls acting like an arrogant guy also drives them wild but that just tends to be the insecure girls.
/r/seduction05/10/24 01:12 PM
2

I tend to ignore girls because I’m shy and honestly it drives them wild inadvertently, it’s bizarre! I don’t know about how you maintain that on a date, maybe it works like you said. For some girls acting like an arrogant guy also drives them wild but that just tends to be the insecure girls.
/r/seduction05/10/24 01:12 PM
1

How about implying you found their photos attractive? I would never say ‘you’re so hot’ but in the past I’ve implied I found their photos attractive and I normally got an immediate delete….i wasn’t sure if it was what I said or if hot girls just often delete your profile when they look at it for first time after the match (?)
/r/seduction23/09/24 09:58 AM
1

Inspirational post, I’m happy for you. I think many people who see themselves as introverts could do the same as you and probably many do. I can remember lots of friends who really blossomed at university in a different social environment for instance.
/r/seduction18/09/24 08:07 PM
1

Wanna have sex? And then ‘with me’ for clarity if needed, that final part is not always needed.
/r/seduction16/09/24 06:22 PM
-2

I tried therapy for a few years, really helped forming a close connection with someone I could say anything to. I actually discovered my introversion was to do with not having much connection with my vagus nerve so I focused a lot on ways to stimulate that- physical exercise, throat exercises, sexual stuff helps too. It’s taken many, many years, but it’s getting results now. I know it sounds random and like some weird internet cure but it’s genuinely true, the nerve is involved in autism so it’s…
/r/seduction15/09/24 09:52 AM
1

That’s true, I was just wondering how many doses worked for you? I’ve done it before recreationally and it helped a bit but I haven’t done it in ages as it has some other side effects etc.
/r/seduction13/09/24 05:03 PM
1

Wow, that’s great news, are you able to tell me more about your ketamine therapy- what it involved and how much you took and how it changed you? I’m in a similar position
/r/seduction13/09/24 10:36 AM
21

It’s definitely hard to tell in a bar because as you say people will be next to you in a close space anyway. One thing that I’ve noticed is often true is that girls who are interested will often be unwilling to actually make an obvious sign like look at you and smile or turn around and make eye contact, they’ll just stand near you or walk past you, mostly without looking at you. Sometimes girls will tell their friend to leave and give you the chance to speak to her, but even then I’ve had a girl…
/r/seduction12/09/24 08:42 PM
1

I don’t think that, I was just curious if people thought this particular girl be interested given I’ve seen her checking me out, but maybe that’s normal, I don’t know.
/r/seduction09/09/24 08:22 PM
1

That’s actually not a bad shout. There’s actually a chance he is her brother, they both look Greek or something.
/r/seduction09/09/24 08:02 PM
0

Her boyfriend is way more jacked than me and is very confident but I’m more traditionally handsome facially, but as you say it depends on the situation even then.
/r/seduction09/09/24 07:50 PM
-1

It’s true, I was just trying to build up some confidence to chat her up or whatnot but it seems unlikely she’d be interested in cheating, I just find it interesting that even women in relationships appreciate men looking at them and look back themselves.
/r/seduction09/09/24 07:48 PM
1

lol yeah I think this is it, she’s literally always in there perfecting her already perfect ass, so I feel like my checking her out is what girls like that want.
/r/seduction09/09/24 07:46 PM
0

Yeah that makes sense. Generally it’s better to see if you have chemistry in person and you’ve already passed the first hurdle of the girl thinking you’re a normal etc. Good luck on your date.
/r/seduction08/09/24 02:35 PM
1

Tbf it’s not necessarily flakiness, it’s just not enough interest to take it further.
/r/seduction08/09/24 10:44 AM
1

You mean he should have chatted a bit on text before proposing a date? I feel like advice on here goes both ways on everything lol
/r/seduction08/09/24 10:43 AM
1

What’s the significance of only using messaging to arrange a date? Is that a good rule to folllow? I assume you sometimes need to build a bit more repore online and then arrange a date, no?
/r/seduction08/09/24 09:31 AM
0

Yeah it’s funny I’ve noticed that girls can like nerves- maybe because it shows you have a genuine interest in them.
/r/seduction05/09/24 07:19 PM
4

I’m very similar to you, I’ve had these situations many, many times….I wish I could say that I leant my lesson and spoke up but I’m still a shy guy. One thing I would say is normally when I do speak up it’s like spell has been broken and it’s much easier to chat and normally the girl is a nice person and even if it doesn’t lead anywhere it’s a nice encounter. You’ll get more chances like these…take a chance.
/r/seduction02/09/24 08:36 PM
6

Not sure about having minimal social skills…sounds arrogant but almost every time I go out I get very good looking women smiling at me or giving me signals but on the rare occasions that I go over to one of these smiling women, they are easily put off me by being a bit autistic. Maybe that’s an extreme example but I don’t think you can have sex appeal without social skills. What does everyone else think?
/r/seduction31/08/24 09:59 PM
1

Good for you man. What is the take out of Models book? I’m a little too honest as a person, I can’t believe that’s a brilliant way to be based on my own experiences….is it more around not bullshitting?
/r/seduction30/08/24 07:51 AM
2

Haha, goddamn incels, I knew it was their fault!
/r/seduction17/08/24 05:12 PM
1

I’d generally say that’s a way of closing the conversation but it doesn’t mean they find you unattractive, it might just be that they are shy or already have a partner. I’m shy and that’s the sort of thing I’d say to someone as I wouldn’t know how to progress the conversation.
/r/seduction17/08/24 10:16 AM
2

I don’t think youre not attractive enough…I had the same experience recently with a girl who I’ve seen around a few times and would give me clear signals she found me attractive…when I finally approached her it was the same scenario as you described- brief convo, I asked for her number, texted her a few days later and no reply…. My analysis is that I just didn’t impress her much with the conversation- it was just a few generic bits, I didn’t make her laugh or connect with her…her finding me attr…
/r/seduction16/08/24 08:00 PM
2

My impression is that showing an interest IS an essential part of the intial process at least. Give them a hint you are interested and see how they respond.
/r/seduction11/08/24 03:03 PM
0

Saw him on Conan on YouTube and he came across as the lamest man imaginable…..zero charisma, pretending to be someone he wasn’t. If his method worked then it truly was a miracle.
/r/seduction25/07/24 04:16 PM
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