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IWillHandleIt Archive

View 6 posts and 66 comments by IWillHandleIt on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Just ask yourself if you want the starfish. If not, go do something else.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/11/15 04:00 AM
1

Is your dad an alcoholic? He certainly sounds like one. My dad is the same way, and he is an alcoholic. If your dad doesn't drink, he may be what they call a "dry drunk". It has taken me years to change from being an approval seeker and while I'm continually improving, I have come to the realization that I will have to work on this for the rest of my life. My suggestions are to find the book Codependent No More and get involved in Al-Anon (a group for families of alcoholics) if it exists in your…
/r/askMRP07/11/15 08:24 PM
1

Depression is like an infection -- it spreads to everyone in the house. Treat this like an oxygen mask on an airplane. First, secure your oxygen mask, then help your wife, because you can't help her if you can't breathe! What I mean is, deal with whatever is depressing you, and then you will be in a good position to help your wife. You need to be able to keep her depression from bringing you down. If you are also depressed, you won't be able to help her. Get your health in order, and then start …
/r/askMRP07/11/15 08:00 PM
1

Your feelings for her do not affect how attractive she finds you. Trying to qualify yourself to her with a bunch of compliments will communicate to her that you are a loser, and how many women go for losers? What you're doing is a sort of covert contract: if I find her attractive, she should find me attractive in return.
/r/askMRP07/11/15 07:18 PM
2

Never ever kiss her ass again! Agreed. Either figuratively or literally.
/r/askMRP01/10/15 04:05 AM
2

If you want to agree and amplify... "I do too respect you! Ask any of my ten mistresses!" Also, don't pretend like you're not trying to get sex when you are. Women are not stupid. When you pretend like you're not trying and then lie about it, you look weak, and weak turns women off faster than you can flip a light switch. If you want sex, tell her how good she looks and how bad you want her, be prepared to go do something else you enjoy if you get a no. The final thing I would say is if you fail…
/r/askMRP01/10/15 04:04 AM
1

This is an old post, but it's an important question. Yes, you should apologize, because you were wrong. Weak men do one of two things -- either they apologize all the time for things that aren't their fault, or they put on a macho act, use lots of bravado, and never apologize for anything.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/15 04:41 AM
3

I think he did.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/15 02:18 AM
1

She knows she will not win the argument. She knows I won’t give a fuck. If you're concerned with "winning" the argument, you do give a fuck.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/15 09:31 PM
3

It's really about your attitude, and that can't be changed in a day or a week. For now, do your best not to act butthurt, but the change really comes when truly aren't butthurt. Work on your internal dialogue. When you are really "there", you won't be butthurt, and you won't really be withdrawing affection; instead, you will just go and do something else that makes you happy rather than wallowing in your disappointment. It will be about you taking responsibility for your own happiness instead of…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/15 09:23 PM
2

Do what makes you happy and invite her along for the ride.
/r/askMRP13/09/15 02:22 AM
5

There's a lot going on here. If you married someone messed up, it's a guarantee that you're messed up too. I agree with the other poster who said you are likely a codependent. The most important thing you need to do is fix your own shit. If you think just getting a divorce is going fix everything, you're wrong. You might be rid of her shit, but it won't fix your shit. One of the most popular books on codependency is called Codependent No More. You should get read and absorb that book. NMMNG hits…
/r/askMRP13/09/15 01:53 AM
2

I like women with big boobs. I married a woman with big boobs. Do you think counseling could get me to stop liking large breasted women? If not, what chances do you think counseling has in changing what your wife finds attractive? Now what if your wife kept pestering you to go to counseling because she knew you needed to work on all your problems? You finally agreed, but you were sure the problem was not with you. Would you take it seriously? Would you work on things when you knew it was all her…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 05:38 PM
1

Once she figures out that your guilt button is broken, she will stop pressing it. It may take a few tries though. My wife his pretty much given up on mine since I stopped reacting. Keep up the good work.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 05:11 AM
1

Welcome to female solipsism. I have a few suggestions: Don't try to bring closure to your argument. Doing so is playing in her frame, playing by her rules, on her turf. It shows you give a fuck about whatever she's pissy about. Stop giving a fuck! Don't argue with women, because they don't fight fair. It's about her feelz and she knows her feelz are right. You will lose. The way to win is not to play the game. If you do that, she is setting the tone. By trying to talk to her about it, you look w…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/08/15 09:18 PM
5

This site linked by OP is done by some sort of feminist ideologue. It uses all the feminist buzzwords. Once I read 'misogynist' I knew what I was dealing with. It likes to Dave Futrelle's site. It also links to downvoted posts from here (-11 rating on one) and claims that is evidence of how much this sub hates women -- seriously downvoted posts! They link to other articles, saying there is a specific thing in them, and I can't find it. They are drinking some strong kool-aid guys.
/r/TheRedPill07/11/14 05:06 AM
2

Thank you. I think that explains what the other poster was trying to get at. What are your suggestions on how to handle those kind of shit tests?
/r/MarriedRedPill04/11/14 10:07 PM
2

I think this is an interesting viewpoint and I want you to explain more where you're coming from, because I don't entirely understand what you're getting at. What exactly did she get that she wanted? I do think I need a better way to deal with the "Why do you want me?" and "Why do you think I'm beautiful" and one of the reasons for my post is I want some suggestions.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/11/14 10:05 PM
2

It will get easier, especially if you work on "internal game". I'm getting to the point where my wife's shit tests are amusing. I'm actually enjoying them and passing effortlessly much of the time. You will get there too. Instead of rubbing her back and hoping she will get interested, be direct and assertive. Just go up to her, smack her ass, look her in the eyes and tell her how bad you want her, how hard she makes you, and how you're going to give it to her so good she will be begging for more…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/10/14 06:07 AM
4

I'm going to upvote you because you bring up something funny. It seems like every time I hear a woman say something like, "That would never work on me!" it just so happens that it works very well on her. I guess she's just trying to convince herself of what she's saying, but damn if I haven't seen this multiple times in real life.
/r/TheRedPill30/10/14 10:44 PM
1

Going up to a girl and calling her beautiful and buying her drinks? She's used to this. Going up to a girl and negging them? I've seen this work on girls multiple times. So fucking true! I had some bitch come up to me in a bar and wanted me to move so she and her stupid friends could sit together. As it so happened, that very day I was tired of being a people pleaser and decided everyone could go fuck themselves. So I started fucking with her: Me: What do I get for moving? Her:[Gets all pissed o…
/r/TheRedPill30/10/14 10:34 PM
1

Most of the western world has narcissistic personality disorder. It's ME ME ME! culture. The best is when you get one entitled person calling another entitled. "Check your privilege" and all that.
/r/TheRedPill30/10/14 10:11 PM
2

Those are good replies!
/r/MarriedRedPill30/10/14 09:28 PM
2

Just make sure you don't remove your big stick before you've finished downloading your payload. That'll corrupt shit. If her filesystem gets corrupted then you have to fsck her. (google it if you don't know)
/r/MarriedRedPill30/10/14 09:24 PM
2

You're not going to convince many people in /r/deadbedrooms that this stuff works. To inject any helpful knowledge, don't mention TRP and tone it down a bit. Most have been fully sold on this "communication" bullshit which really means talking. Communication is important, but not so much the verbal kind. Society has been sold a lie about women wanting feminized men. But no matter how much it's told, it doesn't seem to have any effect whatsoever on what creates sexual arousal in a woman. Women wa…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/10/14 06:34 PM
2

I agree, shit test. This is where you don't back down. She laughs at you? You give a smug smile and say, "It'll grow on you." She will then come back at you with, "No it won't it!! You look stupid!!!" That's when you just smirk and walk away. Calm as can be. It sounds like you're not owning the part. UrCreepyUncle, in order for this to work, you have to believe it. If you don't, your body language will give you away every time. The book No More Mr. Nice Guy is extremely helpful for "internal gam…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/10/14 06:11 PM
3

This is almost exactly what I've experienced. And NO, it's not because of the conversation. You can negotiate duty sex with your wife, but you can't negotiate her getting so wet that it's running down her leg. In my case there was no dead bedroom, but I wasn't getting it as often as I wanted. And sometimes, she just wasn't that into it. Since I've been making these changes, I'm getting way more, and way better sex, and the only thing that has changed has been in my head. Like you said, she has m…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/10/14 08:56 PM
6

Yes she does! Had this exchange over IM the other day: W:sigh ... sometimes I wonder. Was it truly all worth it? XXXXX talks to me about possible problems in getting my funding extended. As it stands now if the funding is not extended on XXXXX, 2015, I will no longer have a job. M:We will handle it. W:Thanks I needed to hear that. I know we will be ok but every one has their time of doubt and worry. M: I'm sure your intelligence and [graduate-level in-demand science degree] and [computer skills]…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/10/14 08:04 PM
21

Explaining why it's creepy ("I'm uncomfortable when men I'm not sexually interested in are sexually interested in me.") would sound self absorbed and vein. So instead of explaining why they just put out a blanket statement that, to the uninformed, reads that it's never okay to approach a woman. Pscyhological studies show that women make 'the first move' with body language when they see a man. The body language tells him she's attracted to him. If a man starts giving come-ons without her first sh…
/r/TheRedPill29/10/14 07:12 PM
4

My new theory on "asshole" and "jerk" is they are expressions of a woman's frustration at a conflict of her emotions. It's kind of a "I hate myself for loving you." For example, she wants you to do something for her. She knows you probably don't want to, but tries to talk you into doing it anyway. You don't want to, and use that word so many men find difficult to say: "no". She is mad because she doesn't get what she wanted, yet at the same time, she finds you more attractive because you have a …
/r/TheRedPill29/10/14 06:13 PM
2

My wife has a friend whom she says gives her TMI on a regular basis and says she doesn't like it. Wife then admitted spilling some details about us to a different friend, but said the two of them were drinking at the time. (Guess that was a bit of hamstering since she said she doesn't like talking about that stuff with her girlfriends). Apparently she told her friend that I am lots of fun in bed.
/r/TheRedPill28/10/14 03:33 AM
49

"She says sadly it is because we are insecure about our weight" "Women worry that they can't live up to the expectations of a fitter man" Translation: they don't want you to run dread game on them, because then they don't hold all the cards. But we all know what happens when you start going to the gym and getting in great shape. Can't repeat it enough: ignore what they say; watch what they do.
/r/TheRedPill27/10/14 09:36 PM
5

I would say the big takeaway here is EASE INTO IT. And don't try this stuff before you're ready. He's still weak deep down, and he's not fooling her. The guys who think this is a quick fix and jump right into it whole-hog seem to always mess it up, because they don't get it. It's like they're taking an old car with a bad engine and repainting the thing, thinking it'll run great after the paint job. Then some of them will say, "This red pill stuff doesn't work," when they had no idea what they we…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/14 04:56 AM
3

I know what you mean. I've been trying to figure it out for a week or so. I think I have most of it figured out: Gamers (game enthusiasts) have been unhappy for a while now about reviews of games coming from a number of websites. Several are part of Gawker. They didn't think the reviews were very objective and didn't reflect how good they found the game to be after actually purchasing/playing it. Since all these sites were seeming to publish very similar (biased, crappy reviews), gamers suspecte…
/r/TheRedPill27/10/14 04:25 AM
3

This is some good shit. Women are not angels. Expect them to be and you'll end up pissed off because you wished for something that is not and never will be.
/r/TheRedPill27/10/14 03:10 AM
1

Things will not improve for you until you accept that you cannot control other people. It sounds like you want to argue and fight with everything and everybody. Life isn't fair. I know it. It sucks. You can either keep trying to fight it, or you can accept that life isn't fair, and direct that energy towards what is within your control. Your approach to life is killing your self worth and sabotaging your chances of success. Once you start letting go, you will be happier and more successful in li…
/r/TheRedPill27/10/14 02:51 AM
3

My favorite that I use on occasion is, "It's a surprise." It doesn't even have to be all that elaborate. Just use the word "surprise" and she's like a kid wondering what she's going to get for her birthday.
/r/TheRedPill25/10/14 06:08 AM
1

Then there is also the clothes and shoes part. She always asks me and I just tell both are fine (because it's true) instead of just telling her to wear that. For a minor thing like that, just go with your initial gut reaction. If she asks you, she wants your opinion. GIVE IT TO HER! It's not like there's a wrong answer in such a case. Well, I take that back. The wrong answer is not making a decision.
/r/TheRedPill25/10/14 06:02 AM
1

If it's a troll, it's a mediocre one.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/14 10:52 PM
1

"Hey, you're smarter than you look" A simultaneous neg? Brilliant!
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/14 10:45 PM
8

the general consensus is that married life sucks, and in particular the sex life really sucks. The general consensus is also to swallow the blue pill.
/r/TheRedPill24/10/14 12:24 AM
2

Only real complaint is the dead bedroom. The dead bedroom is not the problem. The dead bedroom is a symptom of the problem. That's why your wife rolled her eyes at you. Find the problem, fix it, and the dead bedroom will resolve itself. Edit: Also, don't hope. Take ownership of the problem. Tell yourself, "I can fix this problem. I WILL fix this problem. It's time to kick ass and take names!" I know you can fix this. Take that attitude and make it happen brother! We're here to help.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/14 08:50 PM
1

BIG shit test.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/14 08:31 PM
1

Calling you an asshole or a jerk can also be a shit test. You may get this when you start making changes and being less of a "yes, dear" kind of husband. In most cases, it means that what you're doing is working.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/14 08:06 PM
1

I will handle it comes from Dr. Robert Glover. I love this phrase, and say it to myself often -- whenever I start worrying about something. Even though my marriage is in good shape, I convinced myself that if my wife leaves me tomorrow, I will be OK. Sure, it will hurt, but I will handle it. Convincing myself of that allows me to have the outcome independence that Elivs talks about. And he is right. When you have outcome independence, you have leverage. Since I made that change, I have been more…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/14 07:54 PM
2

What was the most important thing you learned from How to Win Friends and Influence People? It's on my bookshelf but I've yet to read it.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/14 07:22 PM
3

Mine just said today she's disappointed in herself for not going to the gym more often, and she's going to work hard on it.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/14 07:20 PM
5

Yes. To the apathetic readers: If they take down gamers, they will be emboldened. We will be in their sights, if we aren't already. That quote from Winston Churchill applies here: "Appeasement consists of being nice to a crocodile in the hope that he will eat you last." SJWs are the proverbial crocodiles. Some gamers are already playing in the SJW frame, worrying about who the 'Literal Misogynists' are. Some red pillers believe they can fly below the radar. Guess what gamers? Guess what red pill…
/r/TheRedPill23/10/14 06:16 PM
1

Doesn't fit with my experience. I took my wife on a date back in August. We dressed up. I looked great and so did she. We went to a nice restaurant. Food was great and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I sat on the same side of the booth, next to her and she gave me a couple of kisses and lots of adoring looks. Of course half the reason I went was that I wanted to go. I like that restaurant. It was not something I grudgingly did because I was brow-beat into it or felt obligated. Wife was raving about it …
/r/TheRedPill23/10/14 06:40 AM
6

"But if you go up and start talking to her, she probably knows anyway" But if we don't give a fuck how and why are we talking to her? By 'you', I mean that as in anyone who has a blue pill mindset. Thinking that you need to communicate your interest to her (and that doing so will have a positive effect on her interest in you) is a blue pill mindset. It's the mindset that the OP was talking about. By 'don't give a fuck', I mean about whether she likes you, whether you get her approval, winning he…
/r/TheRedPill23/10/14 01:45 AM
4

It's all about the feels. Remember, women are highly influenced by emotion, much more so than men. Which of the following appeals to the feels? A) She's like every other woman in that she finds the same things attractive in a man. They're together because he learned what those things are and methodically went about acquiring those traits. B) She's a special snowflake, totally unique in the universe. It was meant to be and astrology or some shit brought the two of them together. A is a cold, logi…
/r/TheRedPill23/10/14 01:20 AM
11

How do we communicate our interest in them? We don't. Women don't give a shit. They only care if they're interested in us. But if you go up and start talking to her, she probably knows anyway. Women are a lot of things; stupid isn't one of them. And we tend to be about as subtle as a train horn. my question is, in a world where a girl is probably simultaneously being pedestalled, oribited ect. by a bunch of needy guys how does one get the girls attention and attraction while following all these …
/r/TheRedPill23/10/14 01:00 AM
29

The more you do for a woman, the more contempt she will have for you.
/r/TheRedPill23/10/14 12:01 AM
4

Dude that sucks. How is everything else with her?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/10/14 11:15 PM
3

You son of a bitch! I was taking a drink when I read that and you almost caused me to spit it out and ruin my keyboard!
/r/MarriedRedPill22/10/14 11:13 PM
4

THIS!!! Inner game is exactly where you should focus your efforts. This story was about me doing something that I like and had always wanted to try. Doing it made me happy. I had NO idea that it would have any effect whatsoever on my wife. I was quite surprised by her reaction. Work on your inner game and she will be all over you!
/r/MarriedRedPill22/10/14 11:09 PM
14

I think she's already fucking another dude, and that dude is the new you! Congrats!
/r/MarriedRedPill22/10/14 08:28 PM
2

Sounds crazy to our male brains, but what you wrote fits perfectly with all my experiences with women. AWALT. An experience I had way back: Call girl up; ask for a date. She waffles a bit and says she has to leave right now for work and to call her back later. I figured I was getting turned down (may have been) so I didn't call her back. She happens to run into one of my best friends, whom I was with when I first met her, and demands my phone number. Calls me on a Saturday evening, all pissed of…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/10/14 07:31 PM
1

I second No More Mr. Nice Guy. You MUST do the activities in the book and talk about it with at least one other guy who is non-judgmental. Doing that makes it 10x more effective. I'd also recommend looking into John Bradshaw's work. You can find videos on youtube where he talks about toxic shame. You have shame over the porn and you must work through it. If you didn't have shame, her bringing it up wouldn't bother you like it does. Once you deal with the shame, you will start being able to maint…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/10/14 07:08 PM
1

Calorie counting is bullshit. It never worked for me -- just left me tired and hungry, and if I lost anything, I lost muscle. What did work for me was cutting out all added sugars. It forced me to cook for myself all the time and only eat real food. I ate more vegetables and nuts. I started eating more fat and protein, including saturated fat, and less carbs, but cut out hydrogenated and seed oils (all those supposedly healthy processed oils like canola). I still consume olive and coconut oil. F…
/r/TheRedPill21/10/14 01:33 AM
4

This will be a challenge for me. My mother beat it into my head that you don't 'man-handle' a woman. The funny thing, now that I think about it, is that from the stories they tell, my father did some of the stuff she would consider 'man-handling' when they first met and she fell head-over-heels for him and married him. Some other thoughts that just came to mind... I met one of my mom's ex-boyfriends that she had broke it off with. He eventually married someone else. They still send Christmas car…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/14 06:17 PM
2

I can confirm. There was one time when she was somewhat mad at me and I went up to her assertively and gave her a nice, long passionate kiss. Her mood improved quite a bit. I will try your tactic fully and see how it goes. Thanks for the tip!
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/14 05:37 PM
2

Quote from Dr. Robert Glover, author of No More Mr. Nice Guy: "Seeking women's approval creates rage towards women."
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/14 09:59 PM
2

It's like she only notices the small stuff and doesn't see the overall big picture of value that I provide. This sentence tells me everything about what's going on. We think that by doing nice things for women, we will build up a credit -- like putting money in a savings account -- which can be used for a rainy day. I'm very familiar with that thinking. Sadly, it doesn't work like that. What you're looking for is respect and appreciation from her, and you're not getting it. That's why you're get…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/14 09:37 PM
2

In his mind, sex with these other women is completely off the table, so he's not going to give a fuck. Every time I didn't give a fuck, I did everything 100% right -- NEVER FAILED! I didn't seek her approval, because I didn't give a fuck. If she was bitchy, I was a real ball buster because I didn't give a fuck. I was cool and calm around her because I didn't give a fuck. I held frame (I had never even heard of this at the time) and did what made me happy because I didn't give a fuck. Not giving …
/r/TheRedPill15/10/14 09:23 PM
2

I have this problem with my wife too. I think the best thing to do is not react -- maintain frame as they say. I, too, find it difficult not to react sometimes. I think in most cases it's an attempt at guilting you into doing what they wanted you to do, and that's why it works. By maintaining frame, you don't reward her behavior. Example of mine would be from a while back -- we took a trip to visit my parents -- a four hour drive. I can't remember details but she had asked if I would drive the e…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/10/14 08:47 PM
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