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IllBrother6221 Archive

View 0 posts and 54 comments by IllBrother6221 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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4

Getting a dog. I love spending time with the dog. I meet lots of people walking the dog. Honestly the number of times I've felt down but had to take the dog for a walk and I've barely started the walk before I'm feeling happy. I'm 9 months divorced. Things felt a lot better after 3 months. I dont spend much time with people, thats a symptom of letting my wife do the heavy lifting on the social side when we were together. The main thing stopping me getting the social aspect of my life together is…
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/26 07:02 PM
3

Bro, its meant to be Once bitten twice shy. Just remember that when you wake up in the morning.
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/26 01:36 PM
4

She's not making bad financial decisions that are creating debt, she struggles to hold down a job. Sounds a bit like what my wife was like, but I didn't mind, I just earnt the money. You don't make her staying home and you earning an option, which is fair enough. I guess if you love her and this is the only problem then you earning the cash is an option? Are the problems deeper than this? If you get divorced you might end up like me, which is curled up on the sofa with the dog most nights, which…
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/26 07:34 PM
5

I didn't really want to be with my wife so when she asked for a divorce I was grateful.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/26 02:11 PM
8

No, once trust goes it goes. People either are loyal or they aren't.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/26 05:13 PM
3

Sounds like my situation. It's a very good starting point for an amicable divorce. For me the key to keeping it amicable was always consulting chatgpt on financial matters. Plenty of times I was sure I was getting the short straw but in reality I never was. Good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/26 08:32 PM
2

Why don't you divorce her then? Must be better than the other options you mention. I was 20 years married. I think I prefer single life. I've got a dog for company, dogs make much better companions than women 🤪
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/26 11:28 AM
1

Luckily I was 3a
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 06:03 PM
2

After me and my ex got the settlement she realised she'd under budgeted for the kids. I voluntarily paid more. Its worth pointing out my ex told me about the difference but didn't demand more from me. So I think two things, do what is fair, take your wife's attitude into account when deciding what's fair.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 11:12 AM
3

She sounds a head f#!k. Time to start a new life and stop wasting this one with her.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 09:12 AM
1

It's the same in the UK. I think OP doesn't think it fair to split because he didn't contribute to the deposit but he's definitely entitled to it.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 06:35 AM
1

Fair enough. You have to do what you think is right. But understand that all money made during the marriage is equal. Your wife gets the deposit back but the equity gain is equal. So you are down 60k. Given the law says its 50/50 and your wife already has it made I think 50/50 is fair. You could put thar additional 60k into pension, claim tax relief and make it 80k to 100k. That is going to knock say 2 years off your retirement. So make sure you definitely understand why you are getting way less…
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/26 09:29 PM
2

Have you tried putting everything into chatgpt? I spoke to a top divorce lawyer and to be honest I didn't get much more than chatgpt. So seems: 50/50 on equity after deposit is 52.5k each. 50/50 on savings is 60k each. So 110k to you? So why do you and your wife think only 48k to you is fair or even generous as you put it? I'm impressed at the size of mortgage you took on your salaries. Must be an amazing house. Wish I had a mum and dad like your wife's. I married and divorced up too. Unlucky fo…
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/26 08:24 PM
3

35m. Very young, lots of time to start again. Stick with it til 45 and your wife pulls the plug because she's in the same boat as you, your relationship is likely too unstable to go the distance. I think you fix your life as soon as you can. You sound outgoing so restarting easier than for some.
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/26 05:48 PM
1

Splitting stuff is fair. My wife moved out and I split the stuff with her, would have felt selfish not to.
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/26 09:14 PM
1

18 years. Living seperate lives, I pursued my interests.
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/26 01:10 PM
3

Unless you are happy for her to continue to have affairs you have to go.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/26 10:19 PM
3

I got a dog and started doing lots of DIY. Not felt lonely for quite a while. Keep busy.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 09:27 PM
3

Don't rush to caregorize what you are feeling. It's easy to misinterpret your emotions. I remember thinking I was lonely until a friend said I must be feeling weird, I immediately realized I didnt actually know what I was feeling a the vague category of weird was a great holding label, it comes with no baggage.. Don't talk emotionally to yourself, be very factual. The emotions will sort themselves out and in the long term you will come to understand what you want and what you must do.
/r/Divorce_Men10/01/26 04:35 PM
2

How long have things been this way, seems like at least four years? Have you come to the conclusion that this is who you married and never realised or did she change along the way? Seems like your wife has nothing in life that motivates her.
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/25 10:10 AM
2

I got 50/50 and I agree. Takes a while to get used to the weeks you don't have them. I gear the weeks I dont have them to DIY, see friends, have some me time. I find I focus more on the kids when I have them than before.
/r/Divorce_Men29/12/25 10:54 AM
3

Shed prefer the sugar coated version. Stick with that.
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/25 05:24 PM
1

Trapped because of the dogs? I got a dog when I knew we were separating. I Iive in a semi, anytime I leave the house he barks the place down. He's my companion though and I'll stick with him and try to get him to chill until its untenable. For me the dog is a life line. For you sounds like the dogs are the last reason for anger? You sure your life will be better without them?
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/25 10:27 PM
2

Hiking with the dog. Diy. Open fires. A few adventures
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/25 09:53 PM
3

I think if you have friends you can connect with I don't think you will feel any more alone than now, if your wife is as bad as you say. I don't see you are getting any companionship from her and I imagine it often feels worse being in the house with her. Imagine this. You are on your death bed having never left. I am sure you are regretting living a lie and not knowing. Now imagine dieing alone, although you are probably not alone if you have family and friends. For me if I only have one life I…
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/25 07:48 AM
1

How can you be lonely when you have two dogs? Think you are just finding that dogs make better companions than people.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/25 09:50 PM
6

She already betrayed you by leaving. I doubt she would change her way long term. Even if she did something would be forever broken in the bond of trust?
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/25 08:10 PM
4

Job 2. Improving the house 3. Hiking with the dog 4. Learning guitar 5. Listening to Jazz/Jazz clubs That is what is keeping me going.
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/25 07:26 AM
8

Dogs are the best companions.
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/25 09:24 PM
1

If you've wanted a divorce for two years and don't do it you are likely to both plod along unhappy. Then in the blink of an eye most of your life is gone and your other half makes the decision for you. Whilst starting again is scary you are at an age where plenty haven't even started. And think about this, you stay married til you die. How are you going to feel on your death bed knowing your life was a lie? That you never had the courage to find a life you wanted. If that's an OK outcome for you…
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/25 08:08 AM
6

I waited 18 years. How much time do you want to lose?
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/25 09:00 PM
7

Reading stuff like this I realise how lucky I am. Having to take a second job WTF? Did she have a job?
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/25 08:44 PM
2

How old was your son? Sounds like he was probably manipulated?
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/25 05:12 PM
1

I think he was 35, maybe a bit older when they met. He was late 30s or early 40s with first maybe 43 with the second. No complications. I know another guy who got divorced at 60 and shacked up with a 40 year old and got her pregnant by mistake. He was really unhappy about that.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/25 07:41 AM
4

Man, my sister got re-married at 40, her husband is 46. They have a 5 and 3 year old. It is not too late but don't try to force things. Accept the universe as it unfolds. Enjoy the journey, you might not get another.
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/25 09:08 PM
3

If your wife wasn't gone but just away for the week you would love it right?
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/25 08:44 PM
2

The FBI or CIA could surely solve this problem?
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/25 07:25 AM
2

Two things help me: 1. Hobbies and DIY to give me purpose 2. Dont have emotional conversations with myself about stuff that I know just leads to a dark hole.
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/25 07:18 AM
5

The universe is a mirror of ourselves.
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/25 07:07 AM
0

Me and my STBXW plan to do this but there is no ill feeling between us.
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/25 10:33 AM
3

"Can we talk? I don't want yo go on living like this. We need to agree a seperation plan" worked for me.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 12:44 PM
6

A hoarder, eughhhhhhh. Sounds like you need to get out of doge before she gets you into even more debt? Yeah it's a bad position and yes it sucks that you have to not only shoulder the debt that is due to her recklessness but also pay her way after divorce. But the sooner you make the decision the sooner you can get back on your feet
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 06:54 PM
5

Feet up, watch the telly, a beer. Marvel at how tidy everything is. Get a goodnight sleep not being woke up by the snoring. Dont you get days and weeks on your own now? Do you enjoy that time?
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/25 04:27 PM
3

You get to start all over with someone you want to be with in your late 30s rather than living a lie for the rest of your life. I know loads of people that started again much later than you and found someone they really wanted to be with. I think you are scared of the unknown, but fast forward to your death bed continuing your current life, is that man thanking you or not?
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/25 06:40 PM
2

It's clearly time to move on, your wife has already made the decision and you are playing catchup. I'd work through a game plan before discussing seperation with your wife.
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/25 08:53 PM
1

I think you need to decide if you will be happy with things staying as they are, is that cool 5 or 10 years down the line? She's not talking to you and sounds like her attitude towards you has been off for a long time, why will anything change?
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/25 06:43 PM
1

Another vote for time to get divorced. You are living like a crazy man!!!
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/25 06:43 PM
4

Which bit bothers you most. That she's talked about leaving the entire marriage or the phone thing? Someone saying they are going to leave you the entire marriage doesnt sound like she loves you or if she does then its manipulative.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/25 06:08 PM
3

The law is clear that inheritance isn't a matrimonial asset. So unless you mixed it into joint accounts or she needs it to get a decent house it's yours. It's sometimes raised in governent that it doesn't seem fair that earnt money is split whilst hand outs aren't. The justification I heard is that the money was given to one not both. I just think it's old money in charge of the country protecting old money.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/25 08:56 PM
1

Me and my wife going through divorce. We've stayed in the same house and got along fine. If you don't love each other and see fairness in the same way it's very doable.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/25 07:43 AM
3

You don't wanna be with someone that tells you you don't make enough when you are trying so hard. She sounds manipulative and selfish. I'm sorry you ended up married to this person. Time to move on, good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/25 10:55 AM
1

I was told it has to be 50/50 nights for there to be no child maintenance. Not sure this impacts spousal maintenance which is more based on need.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/25 12:54 PM
3

I guess most people that get divorced ask the same question, "will I spend the rest of my life alone?" A lot of it comes down to maths. People with a wide circle of friends, that do people orientated hobbies and are confident (prepared to let others know they like them) have the highest probability of finding a partner.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/25 06:25 AM
1

I told my kids recently. I was expecting tears and trauma for days, even weeks. Got a shocked look, they retired to their rooms. Twenty minutes later they came down really excited about their new rooms and decorating them. Theyd been in their rooms those 20 minutes researching what furniture they wanted. They don't seem in the lightest bit bothered. Made me a little sad but good result I guess.
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/25 08:00 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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