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LeanderGrant Archive

View 7 posts and 164 comments by LeanderGrant on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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4

That's great you're improving yourself and prepping for the future. I'd say it's possible to find a woman who is saving herself for marriage. You can find women like that in the more extreme conservative circles. That said, women who have not slept around can also make your life miserable. It's most important to understand a few rules about human relationships. If you give a woman everything she wants at all times then she will learn to resent you and devalue what you do for her. If you expect h…
/r/MensRights26/03/23 06:41 PM
16

It's understandable to feel that way, you're not alone. We have to constantly fight the gaslighting of our culture. We are told we are privileged yet labeled as oppressors from birth. We are told to express our feelings but then demonized and mocked if we do. It gets better, but it's a rough road. No matter how hard society tries to guilt trip you, you should never feel responsible for the actions of others. We are responsible for our actions and our character, nothing more. Be stoic, but don't …
/r/MensRights26/03/23 04:38 AM
7

Hahahahaha!!!! It's gone 180 degrees. That's hilarious. People are funny. It's been such an extreme culture shift over the last 15 years. 15 years ago you were a bad person if you slept around, and now you are a bad person if you don't. Craziness.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/23 03:37 PM
2

Women will do this to attractive guys as well if they can. When a man doesn't automatically give her free attention and praise then she will care what he thinks. Women will make an initial assumption on your value based on your looks, but you can change it around by showing them they don't matter to you. Then they will put you in the category of wanting your approval.
/r/MensRights11/03/23 01:28 AM
2

I see that as a common misunderstanding. It can start with being nice. A man will become sexually attracted to a woman when he consistently invests in her happiness. It may start as simple kindness, but the more he invests, the faster he falls in love. Women work the same way. I didn't realize it for a while, but I've hurt some feelings this way. She wants to be kind at first, but when I don't show the appreciation she expected then she tries harder for my validation. The more she invests the mo…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/23 08:54 PM
5

Poor Steve, ain't got a chance. Steve is the guy who constantly invests in the girl emotionally, financially, and with his time. He hopes that one day she will see he is good enough and choose him over other men. That won't happen, because he displays low self-worth by giving his best efforts away for free. We could call the female version of this a "Stephanie". Stephanie is the girl who invests in a man by sleeping with him whenever he wants. She hopes that by giving him constant sex that one d…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/23 08:01 PM
29

This level of entitlement is ridiculous. He financed a lifestyle that she chose to live. Her husband supported her 100% for 25 years and now she is demanding $215K as recompense for having her bills paid. How about she pay him $500K for 25 years of free rent? Then she can pay back 25 years of healthcare, transportation, food, and vacations. Make it make sense.
/r/MensRights09/03/23 05:19 PM
2

I wrote a book recently about working through abuse and using that knowledge to create healthy future relationships. If we don't learn how we enabled the abuse in the past, then it will repeat itself in some variation. You're coming out of a long period of isolation so human contact will be more valuable to you than it is to others. You've been starved of validation for a long time, that makes anyone vulnerable to giving too much when dating. Just remember that if a woman never invests in your h…
/r/MensRights07/03/23 10:28 PM
1

It means exactly what it says.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/23 08:05 PM
62

Sure, in the current culture, there is no right place. But in reality, anywhere can be the right place. You can never be respectful enough to avoid being labeled a creep or a threat, so don't try. Work on your game. The only thing that separates harassment and a welcomed advancement is how you make the woman feel at that moment. If she detects fear, then you are a threat. If you show too much interest, then you are a threat. If she is having a bad day, then you are a threat. A couple of tips: us…
/r/MensRights07/03/23 07:32 PM
64

I actually witnessed a female Doctor yell at a male patient and blame him for being abused by his wife. The doctor's exact quote was "If you cleaned the house like she told you to, then she wouldn't have to throw things at you." The man came in by himself for a checkup and the doctor yelled at him for about 5 minutes straight. The man had recently lost 40 pounds from a severe illness and was still on oxygen, but she straight ripped into him. I was a student at the time, and I chimed in and spoke…
/r/MensRights07/03/23 06:47 PM
43

Very true. There are plenty of older women in Hollywood who are dating men who are 20-40 years younger. Any argument they would use against leo could be used against those women, but no one complains. Feminists need to stop being self-appointed helicopter parents for the world. Adults can make their own choices and they don't need to explain themselves to angry lonely feminists.
/r/MensRights04/03/23 05:07 PM
24

I know you are asking specifically about men not feeling heard in relationships, but please understand that is a very small priority item for us. I'm sure you have good intentions, but to many of us, the answer is so self-evident that the question itself is demoralizing. I know that is not your goal, but it's similar to asking a tortured prisoner of war if his bed linens are comfortable. I don't know if you believe this, but many of us are truly suffering, and not feeling heard in a relationship…
/r/MensRights01/03/23 04:13 AM
2

Society demands men to be nice guys and then mocks them for being kind and respectful. For a resource on healing narcissism and emotional trauma, I'd recommend my book: Subtle Cruelties, Finding the balance between love and abuse. Great post.
/r/MensRights28/02/23 10:40 PM
2

It's a good thought, but not quite specific enough. You have to survive the challenge and then successfully process it. You have to understand why the challenge occurred and how to structure your life to negate that challenge in the future. If you only survive it but never process it then you are worse off overall.
/r/MensRights11/02/23 05:52 PM
27

Very true. In the current day, misogynist refers to a man that doesn't hate himself as much as feminists want him to.
/r/MensRights02/02/23 09:42 PM
43

Our society has created a very unhealthy dynamic by shifting all accountability onto men. A husband is expected to provide for his wife and his children, but the wife is only encouraged to invest in herself. When a husband works he is making money for the family, but when a wife works she is making "her" money. Instead of the wife putting effort into raising "their" children, she is encouraged to think of it as raising "her" children. A husband is expected to always invest in his wife's happines…
/r/MensRights29/01/23 07:38 PM
0

Just like when women create drama. It requires us to invest more in their happiness. He's doing the same thing. When we Invest in someone it makes us love them more. They stay in our minds and we align more of our happiness with theirs. I'd say it's healthy if both people play the same game, and neither takes it too far. I'm glad it's working out for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/23 08:28 PM
0

Both can just adopt. If a woman wants the experience of being pregnant then yes, she can get frozen sperm that was produced by a man. I'm discussing that neither men nor women truly need companionship, but it's nice to have.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/23 02:09 PM
2

Both men and women are attracted to certain traits in the opposite sex and there is nothing wrong with that. Women are attracted to height, deeper voice, jawline, and social status. Men are attracted to youth, a pretty face, and a slim but curvy body. Those are preferences, and everyone is entitled to have them. The problem arises when men or women base their partnerships solely on physical traits. That is a problem because it is idiotic. Such decisions are just an extension of human narcissism.…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/23 01:10 AM
3

Lol, right. If any standards proposed in this post were turned around it would be called sexism. Both men and women are attracted to certain traits in the opposite sex and there is nothing wrong with that. Women are attracted to height, deeper voice, jawline, and social status. Men are attracted to youth, a pretty face, and a slim but curvy body. Those are preferences, and everyone is entitled to have them. The problem arises when men or women base their partnerships solely on physical traits. T…
/r/MensRights26/01/23 01:04 AM
1

I think the general public is full of nice guys with the war on masculinity going on, but that might be a different topic. Anyways, thanks for explaining the sides more clearly for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 03:33 AM
2

I think we have different definitions of nice guy. My definition specifically means a guy who only knows how to be nice and never gets his needs met.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 03:23 AM
1

I know the red pill has more substance than just looks and money. It also includes men's rights, some game theory here and there, and is definitely against being a nice guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 03:12 AM
1

Nah, it works for everybody. Just in how you apply it. My advice isn't too much on the pickup artist stuff, it's more on long-term relationships. But I guess there's some crossover.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 02:56 AM
1

Then why do all the blue pill guys sound like simps? I thought red pill was nice "guys finish last" and blue pill was "be a nice guy."
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 02:42 AM
1

Now now, no need for that. What I described is a very common human experience. Sometimes people want to be alone. That doesn't mean we resent someone, it means we don't want to engage with them at the moment. All humans have a range of emotions, so it's only natural that we feel that range of emotions while in a relationship. We don't want to hurt the ones we love, but we will. Even when we are trying our best to make someone happy miscommunications will happen, and that's ok. The extent of a go…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 02:35 AM
1

totally agree on that second paragraph. I'm not into pick-up artist stuff myself. I prefer a monogamous relationship, but with all the challenges of our psychotic society I want to help people try and figure out a framework that can work for long-term relationships. Everyone is a phone call away from cheating, and our society actively encourages cheaters. I want to optimize monogamous relationships so that they can have stability and passion so no one has to look elsewhere for either.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 02:22 AM
2

So whenever anyone argues for bluepill they sound exactly like nice guys or girls who demand men to always be nice. Isn't that real distinction anyways? Red pill mean, blue pill nice?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 02:16 AM
1

So like, is black a thing, or is it not? Y'all confusing me. So everyone is saying so many things are or aren't red pill. Can we say that red pill is now blue pill since it doesn't agree with itself? My approach is the last paragraph, not the ones mentioning red pill or blue pill. I would say my approach uses some red pill techniques and encourages the woman to use them as well. I'm pretty sure I summarized up alot of the red pill in my discussion. Which is basically to present yourself as valua…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 02:13 AM
1

Yes! Hahaha, I love it! I'm trying to highlight that parts of relationships are not nice. And that's ok. If we are honest, we have all acted a little cruel at times. It is what it is, we are imperfect people. We shouldn't constantly lie to ourselves that we are the perfect partner, and we shouldn't try to be perfect because that's not healthy. The cruelty could be staying at work a little late to get some you time, or buying ourselves something nice and not mentioning it. Unconditional love is t…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 01:59 AM
1

That's alright. I guess I make it sound worse than it is. We all do these things to some extent already. Like waiting an extra second or two when they call your name, or not always acting happy to see them, and so on. A lot of that happens naturally. It's just being real. Because sometimes they're annoying. And sometimes we are. Those small little frustrations work in the background and make us want to try harder. Anyways, that's my view of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 01:50 AM
2

I have. I got really bored and I left. She was gorgeous but just too nice. She gave me whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. It was awesome at first but it got boring as hell. I broke up with her when I caught myself talking to other girls. No regrets in leaving. I value myself and have no need to please people. but when I'm in a relationship I'd like the relationship to be mutually beneficial. I believe love itself is conditional, as it should be. If you beat up your partner they should stop lov…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 01:29 AM
1

Lol. Opposite of that. Being ok to your partner with the occasional shittiness and occasional awesomeness sprinkled in. I recommend it for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 01:21 AM
1

Nah bud, People-pleasing is always a bad game. It's all about mutual investment. And the only way to achieve mutual investment is to give people an urgency to invest. Narcissistic abuse is about turning someone into a people pleaser. That's a bit too far for my taste.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 01:19 AM
1

Sure so love is something we create when we apply value to another human. We invest in them, and their life takes on more meaning to us. So it's a simple equation of getting your partner to invest more in you. Examples of "not nice" : ignore them sometimes, imply they don't matter, and prioritize your happiness far above theirs. Ignoring them: gets them to try harder to get your attention. Implying they don't matter, allows them to invest to prove they matter. Prioritizing your happiness, makes …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 01:14 AM
1

Sure, I feel that. But enforcing boundaries isn't always nice. If they don't have the self-awareness to talk it out then enforcing boundaries can mean ignoring them, putting in less effort, and purposefully becoming distant. Now those are not healthy, but they can save a relationship by restoring a healthy balance in investment. That's what I meant by cruel. And then the other option is to leave entirely. I would like to think that giving to a partner would encourage them to give, but in the lon…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 01:00 AM
4

I respect that. I find mutual trash-talking hilarious. I have friends from both kinds of groups. Sounds like you're a well-balanced person. My post is more for people who are too simpy to risk bantering, or too abusive to be kind.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 12:50 AM
2

Fair enough. Nothing wrong with some good old self improvement.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 12:43 AM
4

I hear you man. It sounds like you two have a good balance. Happy for you. But humans are imperfect, so you both are probably not perfectly kind. When someone achieves being perfectly kind they lose their personality. It's like talking to a robot. If someone doesn't bother us from time to time it's not as fun. Just like friendships. People have more fun when they can make fun of eachother. That means risking hurting some feelings, but it's hilarious so it's worth it. That's how banter works in a…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 12:22 AM
1

Sure similarities are nice, and compromise and trade are absolutely necessary. But creating strong emotions has also become a necessity, and those are only created when someone is not nice. Oh gotcha, I was talking about the mainstream people that give advice. They primarily say that communication is the foundation of all relationships. If that were true, relationships would be easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 12:16 AM
2

I firmly believe that just about any girl can be the right one. I don't think people are that special. As long as they convince you to invest in them and you convince them to invest in you then it'll work. Except for the psychos. Definitely can't make that one work.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 12:08 AM
2

Lol, mainstream society believes relationships are rainbows and butterflies and if anything goes wrong you just have to talk more and everything will magically fix itself. Why can't equal interest and effort can also involve occasional exploitation? Each person will not always want the same things so both need a way to get their needs/wants met. A little manipulation is a good thing as long as both people are playing the same game.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/23 12:01 AM
1

So is black pill also blue pill? Anyways, I'm saying that the red pill works, but it works too good.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 11:54 PM
-1

Sure, so if someone is easy to please then their partner will naturally not feel the same urgency to invest. Over time that means investing less in their happiness.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 11:53 PM
4

More of a realistic mindset. If you are nothing but kind then your partner would be unhappy, because they get bored. If your partner was nothing but kind to you then you would get bored.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 11:46 PM
3

The key is subtlety. We all do this to some extent at almost a subconscious level. I'm not saying yell at each other all the time. Just expect to be treated well, and don't always thank them for things you don't appreciate. If we don't expect them to invest, then they won't, and they are more likely to stab us in the back.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 11:42 PM
1

Lol, black pill fantasy. Never heard of that one.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 11:36 PM
3

Yea, pretty common sense. And yet blue pill people and red pill people don't seem to put that together.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 11:31 PM
1

It's a general principle. Someone who works hard for something will find more value in it. If it's easily attainable, then it's not as fulfilling.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 11:28 PM
1

Redpillers generally refer to it as being a nice guy. What is your view of the blue pill?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 11:23 PM
3

Well, if your thoughts are instantly labeled as ineffective, perhaps they are. Many men who strongly oppose certain views do so because they have already tried them and found them lacking. However, if your ideas are great and helpful to people then I would encourage you to share them more convincingly. Don't give up when people say mean things. Also, age is not the end-all of knowledge that you seem to think it is. We can learn from others regardless of their age, as they have had different life…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 09:36 PM
1

Critical thinking forms the basis of the red pill. It is a combination of strategies that try to answer the question "How can a man succeed in life with women?" There are certainly problems with the red pill as it largely borders on tactics using narcissistic abuse, but saying it is not critical thinking is disingenuous. You can dislike it if you want but a post that claims the other side isn't using their brain is not making much of an argument. To make a viable argument you must include an ans…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 03:33 PM
1

For the most part, men are attracted to emotional women, and women are attracted to stoic men. Humans get angry at things they cannot control, and it makes them try harder to achieve their goal. Men and women both think they know what is best for their partner whether that is expressing emotions or expressing fewer emotions. When a woman wants her man to express his feelings and he refuses, she gets frustrated and puts more effort into his life to understand his feelings. This helps her bond wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 02:59 PM
7

Warning label: This meal may also result in PTSD, suicidal ideation, and loss of your life's savings....Get it before it's gone!
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 01:48 AM
10

Lol. That's what they tell us to think.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 01:42 AM
16

Sure. So the woman will marry the nice guy, but she will treat him poorly because he doesn't have healthy boundaries. She will never treat him as well as her previous boyfriends because he has low expectations of her. She will not invest in him because there is no reason to. He will be nice regardless of how she treats him. Due to her lack of investment, she will never truly value him and could become abusive. She then has the opportunity to leave him for a previous boyfriend, or divorce him to …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/23 01:37 AM
1

They will never stop choosing those men. They want someone to complain about, someone who can make them frustrated, and someone who can make them feel passion. They will never find that in a nice man who does everything for them. That is life's great lie that men and women want someone who constantly validates them. It sounds nice and looks good on paper, but that type of partner is incredibly boring. The men they complain about convince those women to invest. The more a woman invests in a man t…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/23 11:54 PM
67

Many of them are trapped in that cycle. They cannot admit that they could be the problem, because that is too much accountability. They fail to mature emotionally, and while they are lonely and hurting they find solace in blaming men for their situation. It allows them to escape the pain that they hide from. It lets them pretend that they are victims in a world of opportunities. There are also men who have the same approach in hiding from their own pain, but our culture doesn't allow us to stay …
/r/MensRights22/01/23 10:14 PM
1

Now, that is a long story, and the book offers no sources, apart from my experience.
/r/MensRights22/01/23 09:59 PM
3

Thank you, I'm glad you found the comment helpful. I work in medicine in a different specialty. I once intended to specialize in psychiatry but after a clinical rotation in a psychiatric clinic, I changed my mind. I realized that much of that profession cares more about political correctness than helping people. So, I work in another specialty and write books that I believe can help others navigate our strange culture.
/r/MensRights22/01/23 09:41 PM
5

Good post and great question. I feel many men are currently in the position you describe. I published a book that answers your question. It is titled: Subtle Cruelties, Finding the Balance Between Love and Abuse. It's not possible to summarize, but I'll try to give you a few of the principles. These can help restore your faith in relationships by showing you the structure that encourages human bonding and discourages backstabbing. These principles recognize that all humans kinda suck, and that's…
/r/MensRights22/01/23 09:10 PM
1

Fortunately, those are not the only two options.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/23 05:59 PM
1

Of course, and I'm sure Gandhi did as well. They were both willing to hurt some feelings to do what they knew was right. If someone is too nice they cannot stand for anything, because taking a stand is asserting that your ideas are better than the ideas of others. That is not a nice thing to do. MLK was an incredible man, but he had the capacity for righteous anger. He was not afraid of expressing opinions that were painful for others to hear. He shouted with conviction against oppression. He to…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/23 12:43 AM
4

Exactly right, and a man using negging will be called an asshole. Calling someone names doesn't change the fact that we find them attractive. In fact, they usually go together. When they are talented they can bypass our defenses and get to our self-worth. What they say hurts us slightly, and makes us want to prove them wrong. The effort of trying to prove them wrong is an emotional investment. The more you invest the more you care about them. A sneaky trick, but it takes place to some degree in …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/23 09:44 PM
4

So, I believe both the man and the woman should use red pill concepts to achieve the blue pill goal of maximizing your partner's happiness. In other words, both the man and the woman would use negging, both would act a little selfish, and both would only apologize on occasion. That encourages both partners to play the same game, and as long as neither takes it too far, their long-term relationship can thrive. It keeps both interested, provides mutual accountability, and gives both a reason to pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/23 08:25 PM
3

Not really. Nice guys and nice women are honest and good, but they have a false view of life. They are taught by religion, school, and social media to always treat people with respect and so they do. They do their absolute best to do the right thing in every situation and end up getting taken advantage of by everyone. When the abuse they receive gets too much they eventually lash out. It is not their strategy, but their approach to life that makes it unbearable for them. Those men and women don'…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/23 01:43 PM
4

The lie of niceness. Men and women are conditioned to be nice, but nice people rarely succeed in life. Niceness is not manipulative, but a manipulative person can pretend to be nice. Nice people are just conditioned to always follow the rules, and they struggle when faced with moral dilemmas between right and wrong. Nice people rarely change history for the better. Someone capable of positive influence must be more than just nice. They must also have the capacity for cruelty. Being a good person…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/23 02:26 AM
1

That's hilarious, no man can hide that. Back in grade school, if called to stand up in class then we were screwed. The best case scenario is the principles office, worse case is a public indecency charge.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/23 05:32 AM
1

Alright, so hear me out. You're not going to like this, but I'm going for it. When your girlfriend is having her period she gets a free pass to emotionally abuse you and you just have to take it. Because "hormones aren't her fault." That ain't fair, just sayin. As a boy growing up, we have the constant fear of getting aroused while in public and going to jail. That's right, uncomfortable boxers could result in a criminal record. Considering that happens to us like 20 times a day, it's nerve-rack…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/23 05:01 AM
57

What's hilarious is all the studies say that women recover much better than men after a divorce. And I'm just thinking, "yea, no shit" They act like the man shouldn't be upset after his life is stolen from him, and that his wife is just as challenged after taking everything from her husband. Our culture is so fucking weird.
/r/MensRights15/01/23 04:38 AM
2

I think it's fair to say that we both would prefer a world where neither men nor women suffer unjustly. The reason "why" men or women suffer can be difficult but in some cases, the reason and the solution are quite simple. For example, if we increased the pregnancy costs at a hospital by about 1% to include a paternity test. We could eradicate paternity fraud. No man would ever again go through the incredible heartbreak that he was tricked in that way by the woman he thought loved him. He would …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/23 12:23 AM
4

The next generation is failing to mature. Their narcissism allows them to "win" most arguments despite factual information. They value their feelings and "their truth" so much that reality is an afterthought. I don't know when the world will wake, but I see only one way to do it. We have to appeal to feminists' narcissism to explain how women's lives would be better if men weren't suicidal. They will not do anything for men who are suffering, but they will take action if they are the ones that b…
/r/MensRights14/01/23 04:29 AM
1

It depends on your goals. If your goal is superficial validation from many men then physical perfection is a requirement. But superficial validation is just that, superficial. If you are looking for a real relationship then you don't have to embody an Instagram model. Do your best on the physical appearance to open the door to conversations. For most women weight is the easiest thing to work on to start more conversations with potential partners. So the best payback is getting to a healthy weigh…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/23 04:20 AM
1

I will say this: The dynamic back then made it easier for evil men to abuse their wives. That is bad. The system today makes it easier for evil women to abuse their husbands (assault, divorce laws, false accusations, child custody fraud etc). No system is perfect, and evil people on both sides will always find a way to take advantage of the system. In the 1950s there were good men who treated their wives well, and there were bad men. Today there are good women that treat their husbands well, and…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/23 05:53 PM
1

Yet the vast majority of those men in the 1950s would give everything to their wives. They worked hard to provide for her and to make her happy. If his wife cried, he felt pain, because he wanted to be a good husband. The wife was expected to invest in her husband's happiness so she found value in the relationship. Both people invested and both people could feel fulfilled. It wasn't perfect, but way better than the narcissistic feminist standard of giving a woman everything and expecting nothing…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/23 04:57 PM
1

Both men and women should be angry at society. Depression, loneliness, and resentment are skyrocketing for both men and women. We are all sold the lie that we should be attracted to nice people, but no one is. Society encourages men and women to be cruel while they pretend they are good people. Covert narcissism continues to grow among both genders. Our culture makes sure that good people will lose, and evil wins. Your thought on superior men or superior women is pointless. Men who are deemed su…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/23 06:04 PM
1

I hope you find it helpful. Some truths can be painful, but it's better to know the truth when we can use it to make a positive difference. I'm biased because I might be the author.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/23 04:04 PM
1

I appreciate it. And yes. There is a book that discusses this subject and how both men and women should apply it in relationships. It's titled Subtle Cruelties, Finding the Balance Between Love and Abuse. It's a good read, though I may be a bit biased.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/23 02:50 PM
62

You can't suffer from paternity fraud. You will never be falsely accused of SA. If you and a man are convicted of the same crime his jail sentence will be 60% longer than yours on average, and you are also half as likely to be sentenced to jail for committing the same crime. If you go through a divorce you have a 90% chance of having custody of your children through no reason other than your gender. If you get divorced you are far more likely to be awarded financially. You are more likely to pas…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/23 05:40 AM
1

I am referring to someone who is a consenting adult that makes a child with another consenting adult. Both of those adults should be responsible for the life they have created. There are of course exceptions outside of that generalization.
/r/MensRights12/01/23 05:29 AM
1

"generally makes them a bad person." There are always different circumstances. I could probably list another 20 or so exceptions, but I think you caught my meaning.
/r/MensRights12/01/23 04:18 AM
2

Absolutely we should. More referring to a man who does not want to have children with his girlfriend, and a woman who does not want to have children with her boyfriend. Everyone should pursue what makes them happy in whether they choose to have children. But once they do have kids and they decide to leave, then that generally makes them a shitty person. When we make them their life becomes the priority. Thanks for pointing that out. I hope that clarifies, and thanks for the comment.
/r/MensRights12/01/23 04:06 AM
14

We can trust that a partner will act human. They will invariably hurt us in various ways, and light mutual hurts are part of every healthy relationship. However, we can lower the risk of the deeper kinds of pain. A partner is more likely to cheat, leave, or abuse if they do not invest in your happiness. When your partner does invest in your happiness they have a vested interest in protecting your happiness which they helped to create. To achieve this dynamic you should be a little selfish in hea…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/23 03:57 AM
4

Lol, that's great. That reminds me of a few impossible standards for men: He must be dominant but let her lead. He must be funny but also serious. He must be masculine but talk about his feelings. He has to be strong, but never spend time in the gym.
/r/MensRights11/01/23 11:27 PM
1

Do women prefer men that earn more than them? If it's important to a woman that her man earns more, then a relationship with a woman who earns more than her man would be off to a bad start. That said, I'm doing well financially and I'm fine with a high-earning woman, or a woman who earns nothing. It doesn't matter to me. The only thing that matters is mutual investment, and mutual high expectations to keep each other accountable. I expect her to invest in my happiness and she must expect me to i…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/23 09:54 PM
1

It's one of the last places where honest discussion is allowed without being labeled as hatred. People have different views of life, and when we consider opposing views it helps us grow.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/23 09:41 PM
3

For sure. differing perspectives help people grow, but everyone has to be willing to see the other side's point of view. Discussions with reasonable people are almost always productive.
/r/MensRights11/01/23 09:26 PM
3

These are good. Thanks for adding to the list.
/r/MensRights11/01/23 05:08 PM
3

This one is crucial.
/r/MensRights11/01/23 02:45 PM
18

Feedback is always welcome, it keeps us honest. You made some great points, and good to hear a different perspective. An addon to The man who lies and the woman who shares "her truth." - They are certainly both gaslighting, but the statement "her truth" is seen as being vulnerable and strong as opposed to gaslighting. Unless that cultural norm has shifted recently, which I hope it has. Several of the double standards I mentioned are directed toward feminist opinions. Feminist thoughts may or may…
/r/MensRights11/01/23 05:20 AM
3

People don't want to believe that happens because everyone wants to live in the dream of a nice world. A dream where good behavior is rewarded and evil is punished. But in romance, it often works oppositely. Both men and women often reward bad behavior. We are easily tricked into giving our best effort to a partner who uses tactics of emotional manipulation. We want to believe that if we are good, and work hard that everything will work out in the end. But that naïve ideal will never change the …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/23 01:52 AM
9

Love is valuable, but only when we know what it is, and how to create it. Your thought is becoming a little one-dimensional. I’ll give you another angle to think through, this should help your idea to carry more weight. The men who cheated could be the pathetic worms you assume them to be, or maybe some of their wives are not the angels you’d expect. The concept of right and wrong is often more complicated than one side bad and one side good. A man can cheat when he gets bored of his perfect wif…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/23 03:51 PM
45

Thank you for sharing, you seem very well thought out. You are correct that a woman can achieve that lifestyle, but only if the woman had certain qualities and I do see one caveat. She would have to be very intelligent, and fortunate enough to avoid dangerous men. Additionally, she cannot have the slightest hint of a conscience. She would have to be ruthless. If she possesses those qualities and the bit of good fortune I mentioned then I agree. She can have her needs met all her life. The caveat…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/23 06:15 AM
4

It's not about being a good guy and it's not about being a bad guy. It's about getting the woman to invest in your happiness. Bad guys are better at encouraging women to invest in their happiness. Whereas nice guys will constantly give, and the woman will not invest in the relationship because she is not expected to. Obviously, if a man is cursing at a woman she will easily dismiss him from the potential partner list. To be successful he must be subtle when creating expectations for her to meet.…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/23 01:59 AM
20

It's easy to get played with an emotional story until we realize how easy it is for people to lie about horrible things. I'm glad you got the wake-up call. It's a rough lesson. It makes you see the world a bit differently, but now you're better equipped for the world we live in. Thanks for sharing.
/r/MensRights07/01/23 10:31 PM
15

I feel for the guy you're helping, that's a horrible situation. But I do consider myself a survivor. Someone tried to destroy my life with false accusations and it nearly worked. I will never get justice. That's just how it is, and I'm ok with that now because I have to be. A lot of guys in my situation don't make it. Some kill themselves or end up serving jail sentences for crimes they didn't commit. I'm very fortunate in that respect. Had I gone through with my suicide plans the psychopath/fal…
/r/MensRights07/01/23 10:25 PM
11

I appreciate it. It was a similar setting to the one you described. I'm in a new area now where woke feminist ideas aren't as popular. It's far from perfect but definitely a step in the right direction.
/r/MensRights07/01/23 09:52 PM
9

I appreciate it. The future is looking bright.
/r/MensRights07/01/23 09:47 PM
17

Hahaha. I never thought of that one man. Pure genius.
/r/MensRights07/01/23 09:45 PM
1

Well, yes. Both men and women are immoral by nature. If either side thinks they are perfect it becomes very unhealthy.
/r/MensRights07/01/23 02:09 PM
10

It's nice that the author is trying to help boys achieve better, but it is the schooling itself that destroys boys and men. In school everything we do is wrong, and every expression of our success is interpreted as being oppressive. We are punished for our failures and punished for our achievments. Boys are demoralized constantly by being taught that who they are is bad. We are taught that women are good, and men are immoral by nature. The education system is the problem. If you're a parent do y…
/r/MensRights06/01/23 12:38 AM
55

"Toxic male" is the Politically correct way to say "asshole." They invented that phrase so they can swear at us while pretending they have the moral high ground.
/r/MensRights05/01/23 03:01 AM
83

Great question. I'm bored, so I'm going to give you a long drawn-out answer. Our current culture developed around shifting interpersonal dynamics between men and women. Plenty of other reasons, but this is the one that I find interesting. Men coddled women for so long, that women started to believe that a woman's life has more value than a man's life. We were taught by school, religion, and Disney movies that men are strong, so they should protect women who are weak. This sounds nice, but it enc…
/r/MensRights04/01/23 04:14 AM
2

Haha, you make some good points. Fair enough.
/r/MensRights02/01/23 08:56 PM
2

I got that whole guilt thing. So ditching a girl whenever I feel like it bothers me. I could probably kill off that part of my conscience, but I'd prefer to avoid that if I can.
/r/MensRights02/01/23 04:21 PM
2

I was afraid of that, but it does seem like the downward spiral is picking up speed. Well, at least the memes are good. Haha. Take care man.
/r/MensRights02/01/23 03:58 AM
2

What, but he didn't live with her. That sucks. Why do they want our stuff so badly? lol.
/r/MensRights02/01/23 03:56 AM
9

Shit, that sucks. That Canadian guy really gave it a go and it still didn't work. Well, good to know. Man, that's horrible. The world is insane, but better to know than find out when it's too late. Thanks for sharing.
/r/MensRights02/01/23 03:54 AM
2

Ooof. Well, I respect your preacher a lot for giving real advice instead of just the "feel-good" teaching. Thanks for sharing.
/r/MensRights02/01/23 03:50 AM
6

Yea, it's rough. It's like everyone is angry at men for wanting to stay safe. And it's easy for them to shift it and say it's all because of a lack of commitment or some other excuse that makes us look bad.
/r/MensRights02/01/23 03:48 AM
2

The current culture in the US.
/r/MensRights02/01/23 03:45 AM
5

Yea, that sounds about right. Maybe I'll get a dog for while and consider that statistical approach. I'm already a little pessimistic from what I've seen in other marriages and what I've experienced just in dating. Thanks.
/r/MensRights02/01/23 03:44 AM
2

No worries at all. I understand the confusion. I just believe that both men and women should be a little disagreeable sometimes. It keeps us honest.
/r/ExRedPill02/01/23 03:29 AM
1

I wish life were that easy. I wish the world worked as it should. Where being kind to others meant others would be kind back. Unfortunately, human instincts are often stronger than our morals. And the healthy values that men and women should be attracted to often make them look elsewhere.
/r/ExRedPill02/01/23 01:56 AM
1

Why thank you.
/r/ExRedPill01/01/23 10:21 PM
1

"Successful couples navigate through seasons together." - Absolutely agree. Both partners need to be willing to change and adjust, but both partners must also be willing to hold their ground and not change. Case by case basis. Differences between people are wonderful things and don't always need correction. The man or the woman might feel hurt if their partner doesn't change, but being unconquered also makes a partner more attractive as long as both are loyal to each other.
/r/ExRedPill01/01/23 10:10 PM
1

I really shouldn't have used that opening-the-door example. The point I am trying to make is that being a kind and empathetic person is often not enough. Both men and women need a partner who can be disagreeable on occasion. That keeps desire alive, and allows both to hold each other accountable of poor behavior.
/r/ExRedPill01/01/23 10:05 PM
0

The concept is that women generally say they would prefer a man who always treats them well. That's more common sense and I don't think a source is quite required for that. As to the term gentleman, it's just something I've heard from time in debate panels when women are referring to a man who portrays idealized kindness.
/r/ExRedPill01/01/23 09:43 PM
1

Yes, opening doors is quite easy to do. but you caught the concept I was alluding to. Which is someone who will put in the effort to treat you well. I'm happy for you and your relationship. Your partner may be a balanced individual that I suggested men should strive to become. Men should be nice for the sake of being nice, but they must also care about their own happiness. I believe the same applies to women. We should all invest in others but we should also expect to be treated well. If we only…
/r/ExRedPill01/01/23 09:32 PM
1

Sure, yet we often use terms to convey the meaning of healthy goals. Like "emotional wellbeing". People define it differently. Some people believe crying very often is healthy, while others think it depends on the situation. Both are valid in their own ways. It is up to individuals to determine what is right for them. I like to provide information for people to consider along their journey. I think gentleman can mean something toxic or it can mean something good. It all depends on how we define …
/r/ExRedPill01/01/23 09:22 PM
3

Thank you for the recommendation. I enjoy reading other views of reality, particularly when they are well thought out. I glanced at the back cover and might check it out. There is a book I also like to recommend. It's titled Subtle Cruelties. It also discusses emotional healing and becoming emotionally whole. I find that many problems in our world could be healed if people worked through their trauma and made sense of where it comes from. Thank you for the comment.
/r/ExRedPill01/01/23 09:15 PM
2

Thank you. Just some lessons I've learned through life. I find it's best for both men and women to be balanced between selfishness and selflessness.
/r/ExRedPill01/01/23 09:02 PM
1

I whole heatedly support that outcome, but I think the tactics of radical feminists are continuing to shift the culture in n unhealthy direction. MRM is doing an incredible job as a place for men to come together, but all media sources still try to demonize it. I want that better world you speak of, but society is steadily moving in the opposite direction.
/r/MensRights01/01/23 05:12 PM
1

Have you never talked to a feminist?
/r/MensRights01/01/23 05:08 PM
1

Great point. But the title would include "Children need Fathers", it provokes the idea of doing what is best for children which is something society can get behind. It creates the emotional response of wanting to protect. While it's not as accurate as the overall goal of Men's Rights, it would show that we are the good guys. Public perception usually is that simple, if we say something that sounds nice, then they can virtue signal by supporting it.
/r/MensRights01/01/23 05:07 PM
1

Exactly.
/r/MensRights01/01/23 05:03 PM
2

Well, I know you don't need to hear it from me, but thanks for caring about men. It makes the world a better place when men and women can look out for each other.
/r/MensRights01/01/23 06:43 AM
1

I agree with you. There is almost nothing left besides dishonest manipulation. I say we join with the same tactics. Taking up the banner of "Children Need Fathers" or a similar phrase while we still fight against false accusations, paternity fraud, child custody fraud, etc. Then if anyone disagrees with us, we say "well you must hate kids then" It's manipulative, and I hate those tactics more than anything. But I think those types of tactics are the only thing driving society now.
/r/MensRights01/01/23 06:27 AM
1

I agree. I still think 'Men's Rights' is the perfect name for the movement that incorporates everything that we are going for. But I know that name struggles in terms of PR and getting others on board. Women in general don't really have a point of reference if they haven't seen a man they love suffer due to false accusations, paternity fraud, jail sentencing disparity, etc. Many assume 'Men's Rights' has something to do with misogyny instead of fighting against real injustice. I thought the "Chi…
/r/MensRights01/01/23 06:19 AM
2

I didn't think of that. Great point. I would hope that the causes themselves would draw men in, but the name I suggested could make us hard to find. But it seems really hard to get women on board with the name 'Men's Rights.'. When a woman has seen a man she cares for suffer from false accusation, paternity fraud, or child custody fraud they understand it perfectly, but only if they have a point of reference. Without a point of reference, they often assume it means "misogyny" or something. Tryin…
/r/MensRights01/01/23 06:11 AM
1

Hahahaha. That's great. I know my idea sounds shitty. But honestly, I'm not seeing us gain much ground. Schools teach women to hate men and teach men to hate themselves. We need to get some kind of innovation going if we are ever going to get society thinking of men as people again. Playing those word games like other movements is manipulative, but you can't say it's not effective.
/r/MensRights01/01/23 06:04 AM
1

Great points. I believe 'Men's Rights' is the perfect phrase to describe the goals of the movement. And I agree that those who are angered by such a phrase are angered due to their own bigotry. But I think their bigotry is becoming engrained in society at large. Schools train women to hate men and train men to hate themselves. They have in a way changed the term men to mean something evil. It might be a naïve idea to think the term 'Fathers' would fair any better, but might be worth a try. The t…
/r/MensRights01/01/23 05:57 AM
1

That's a very good point, it could cause division and confusion among the MRM. I just noticed how other movements have created manipulative names that cannot be attacked, and those who would attack any point of the organization appear evil. Such as black lives matter. If I were to disagree with any of their 13 principles, then I would seem like a bad person even if I have good intentions. The statement "Children Need Fathers," would use that same manipulation. It's fighting dirty but for the rig…
/r/MensRights01/01/23 05:42 AM
0

That's fantastic, full support. I do worry though, that our culture may have become so anti-male that having men in the title lends itself to more man-hating. Men's Rights perfectly describes the purpose of the movement, but there might be ways to rebrand which makes these causes more effective. Someone can say they are against men's rights while they don't understand what they are saying. But they can't say they are against fathers, or they would out themselves as bad people.
/r/MensRights01/01/23 05:36 AM
-5

I understand that, but rephrasing could be useful to bridge the gap between the men who are being destroyed and the culture that hates men. They might not be willing to help a man, but maybe they could help a father. It's not ideal, as we would want our society to care about men who are suffering, but that suffering has largely been worsening with each decade. It may be time for a new strategy. Using our culture's limited care for fathers we might also address the other many issues of homelessne…
/r/MensRights01/01/23 05:29 AM
4

Sometimes I like jogging at night, but I can't anymore. I'm fine holding my own if someone tries to mug me, but no one is safe from false accusations. If an anxious woman was also outside walking at night she could assume I was a threat. If she has anxiety issues she could call the cops, and then my life is over.
/r/MensRights31/12/22 07:38 PM
2

Oh, I didn't think you overstepped at all. My previous comment was mostly to summarize my own views. I'm sure we agree on many things we discussed, but it would take time to line them all up. And I always welcome differing opinions as well, since they help us all to grow. Take care, and happy new year.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/22 04:32 AM
1

Thank you for well thought-out comment. Happy to reply to each point, but I think I can summarize my thoughts in a different way. Society is losing its sense of reality. It teaches that all relationships must be happy all the time. Like you said we are inundated with examples of "perfect" relationships, where people are always smiling, but it isn't real. Real relationships have highs and lows and take effort. Society must learn to tolerate negative emotions if relationships are going to thrive. …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/22 03:24 AM
10

Nailed it
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/22 01:39 AM
1

But the red pill and blue pill disagree on how to become the right person. ​ Blue pill: Learn to treat people well at all times and they will love you for it. Red Pill: Learn to make people feel inadequate and they will give you the best of themselves. ​ Blue pill gets abused, and red pill abuses others. I'd say it's best to find the balance between the two.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/22 01:35 AM
2

I feel you. I wish life were more simple. Where people could just treat their partner well and it would be appreciated. But when people have such crazy expectations it makes the simple life more difficult.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/22 01:25 AM
1

I feel that. but opposite people will also disagree more. Disagreements are healthy because it makes them less of a pushover.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 11:55 PM
1

It opens the door to a discussion and maybe a date, but money cannot keep anyone's interest in the long run.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 11:42 PM
1

Yea if things continue depression will keep skyrocketing like it has been for the last decade. Every man and woman will continue to take out their trauma on the other side until they are too tired to put effort into a relationship. Men and women don't need each other to survive, but it makes life a lot better if they can figure it out.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 11:41 PM
6

It's hilarious how everyone shits on nice guys. Like, they already don't have a chance and then people demonize them on top of that. Nice guys are not manipulative, if they were then they would get dates. They just have a false view of reality. Men are taught by school, religion, and women that they should be nice, respectful, and express their feelings. Then when they're interested in a girl they approach her by being nice, respectful, and expressing their feelings. Crazy right? To their dismay…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 11:31 PM
15

I fully support lifelong monogamous relationships, with lifelong commitments. I see them as healthy and an ideal environment to raise children. But I cannot support marriage. Our government has destroyed that institution. When one partner is incentivized to leave, it presents a great obstacle to the relationship that many cannot overcome. Healthy relationships involve negative emotions as two people face challenges and learn to live life together. So when negative emotions arise, and there is a …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 11:08 PM
1

Sure, I've had relationships at both extremes and in between. I've found relationships can succeed with agreeing values, or opposing values. I believe all relationships come down to the effort each partner invests in the other. The more we invest the more we will love them. The more they invest, the more they will love us. Investing to change each others' values is still an emotional investment. And similar values will also have subtle differences that bring healthy challenges.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 09:06 PM
1

I find love exists on a spectrum. One extreme is boring, and the other extreme is toxic. Every relationship falls somewhere between the two. The toxic side is alluring, due to the rollercoaster of strong emotions. But it always ends poorly, and getting hurt is no fun. Society likes to encourage us to stay on the boring side, which does provide stability until one partner gets too bored and looks elsewhere. That also leads to being hurt. We must find a balance between the two to ensure that both …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 08:26 PM
2

I agree they complement one another, and both benefit from learning from the experiences and temperament of their partner. They can also both admire their differences, but those same differences will lead to disagreements and accidental offenses. Those negative aspects are also beautiful in their own way. Those disagreements encourage both to expend energy to make sense of their partner, and invest more deeply. As to the first move. It depends on what move you are referring to. Sure the extrover…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 07:54 PM
2

Well said. I think you added the positive thoughts my view was missing. You even covered my next point as well, that when we have to invest more in someone we bond closer to them. Like the example of the adorable puppy you mentioned. Now taking that truth a step further in relationships. This one is a bit tougher: If our partner is always supportive of us and constantly agrees with us, it hinders how closely we can bond with them. We lose the urgency to invest if there is nothing we want to chan…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 07:12 PM
1

Fair point. A peer review study can't really exist on the subject since humans are rarely capable of honesty when it comes to love. The phrase has been widely circulated and accepted since the 1950's, but has always had a more naïve and happy tone to it. My post is to express there are negative feelings associated with differences between partners. Those negative feelings are healthy as well, and should not be discounted by those with a more optimistic view of life.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 06:31 PM
1

And just like an arguing couple, if both political parties realized they need each other things would get better. Good comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 06:22 PM
1

We all have an inherent need to know that our life has meaning. When someone disagrees with us it challenges that meaning on some minuscule level, and we feel bothered. It is not toxic to disagree with a partner, it is just voicing a different view. It's actually quite healthy. But I see where you're coming from. People who live to tear down others and must always be right about everything are certainly not relationship material. I entirely agree with you on that. I am referring to the minor dis…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 05:59 PM
1

There is nothing wrong with having similarities with a partner, but if they are too similar to us then we can get bored. If a partner agrees with our every thought and idea, then it is difficult to remain attracted to them. It is uncomfortable to think this way, but they are easily dismissed if they never challenge us. A partner who occasionally acts differently than we think they should, or sometimes disagrees with us, will give us strong emotions. Those strong emotions allow for passion to exi…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 05:42 PM
2

Haha, well it is a possibility. Introverts can certainly do well together, but ideally, there would be differences in other areas. If a partner does everything the way we do it and thinks the way we think then it gets boring in the long term.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 05:26 PM
1

That's an interesting take, but I believe it goes far beyond having a different appearance. I am referring to how opposing views and behaviors influence human bonding. If a partner is nice to us at all times and agrees with our every thought and idea, then it is difficult to remain attracted to them. They are easily dismissed if they never challenge us. Whereas, a partner who acts differently than we think they should or disagrees with us sometimes will give us strong emotions that relationships…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 05:22 PM
1

"Differences cause friction." That last phrase you used, that's it. Relationships need friction, not deep anger and resentment, but healthy amounts of frustration. Everyone needs a partner who sometimes behaves differently than we would like them to. It shows they are unconquered and makes them more attractive to us. Having some similarities is helpful, but if a partner always agrees with us they become boring. We can stay with a boring partner, but that doesn't mean attraction is thriving.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 04:58 PM
1

Unfortunately, studies do not catch the subtle differences that relationships thrive on. We are initially drawn to similarities as it is what we are used to, but if they are too similar to us then the attraction we feel hits a plateau and steadily declines. The differences don't have to be in every area, but a couple must be able to bother eachother. If we made a perfect partner based on our checklist, they would be intolerable because there is no mystery to them. There would be no reason to inv…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 04:49 PM
1

When there are no differences between people they get bored of eachother. In a long-term relationship, we need someone who doesn't always agree with us for attraction to survive.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 04:40 PM
1

What a wonderful relationship, I'm happy for you both. You made many valid points, and it even made my view a little brighter. Thank you. But I think there are some things you are leaving out. Not bad things, but the uncomfortable ones. The two of you likely disagree sometimes, and he sometimes behaves differently than you would like him to. This brings frustrations and strong emotions that every relationship needs. When the two of you disagree on an answer that seems obvious to you, it doesn't …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/22 04:33 PM
1

Your view of internet standards is probably correct. But Instagram is a really bad place to determine how others in the world would see us in person. Keep reminding yourself that everything you see in online photos is fake, and don't try to compare your natural look to someone else's filter.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/22 09:51 PM
1

I'd say the largest barrier is men and women not working through their traumas of past relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/22 09:31 PM
1

It's a wonderful thought friend. I agree that any man can succeed in dating despite their starting point, but hard work isn't quite enough. Building attraction is counterintuitive. A man or a woman being constantly nice is not attractive to anyone. Their niceness gives the impression of being desperate for approval. If a man puts all his hard work into being nice then he will not succeed. He must know how to apply his efforts to being a good person while expressing himself to the world as compet…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/22 09:29 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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