| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 90 | Body language says a lot. | LuxSimpleJoy | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/01/20 02:09 AM | |
| 25 | “What are you looking for?” | LuxSimpleJoy | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/12/19 04:02 AM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 12 | I think I’m dating a LVM but I can’t seem to force myself to end it.If you stay with him, it will impact your work and school. Breakup and don’t date for a while. Or else you will continue trying to find your worth in someone else’s eyes. This man is beneath you and gaslighting you. Don’t be so afraid of being alone for a bit. In fact, it sounds like you have everything to look forward to. Make some girlfriend plans to go with it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/01/20 01:05 PM |
| 45 | Made me chuckleI know it’s a joke but I have to vent: I cannot believe how many women i hear fawning over this character. It glamorizes everything we need our young women to run away from (even when they aren’t a serial killer!). And it’s all done in the name of “love”. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/01/20 12:09 PM |
| 41 | When he says "you deserve better than me", believe him, and RUN.Yes! I dated a guy who said this, who did HVM things. And then later made it clear that he didn’t think I was reciprocating enough for all the effort he put forth. Eye roll . And what bothered me more is that he held this all in and never said anything like an actual adult! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 02:52 PM |
| 1 | “What are you looking for?”That’s a very good idea! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/19 01:15 PM |
| 4 | “What are you looking for?”I replied “a gentleman always goes first”. Which I still didn’t like doing because I think it was way too quick to ask that, especially without any context. He replied “to be friends first and then see what happens. HBU?” I replied that should probably just be the definition on dating. If the next exchange doesn’t improve, UNMATCH! Because men and women think about this differently. But I think there are only 2 ways to read this and neither are good: 1) he really believes this but he had very li… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/12/19 03:13 PM |
| 4 | “What are you looking for?”Lol does he think I’m teaching to the test here?! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/12/19 01:17 PM |
| 4 | “What are you looking for?”Yeah I couldn’t decide if it’s what they say when they don’t want to waste their time on someone who doesn’t want the same OR if it’s a way to filter through to get the quick f*cks. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/12/19 01:16 PM |
| 10 | “What are you looking for?”I definitely think it’s a valid question. I’m not sure the best time and way to ask it though. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/12/19 04:53 AM |
| 49 | Starting to notice and point out LVM behavior in my long term boyfriendThe first year after leaving a relationship is mind blowing of how you were manipulated or were raised to think these things were normal to support your significant other. Be ready that some people will even criticize you for giving it up. Be ready to find support from people you never expected, too! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/12/19 05:10 PM |
| 137 | Starting to notice and point out LVM behavior in my long term boyfriend8 years, there’s your clear signal. Even before FDS I never thought long relationships without more commitment were good. You can have better. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/12/19 04:51 PM |
| 27 | r/dating post about how men have to be “perfect to be wanted.” Welcome to womanhood!Maybe he needs to date in his own league! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/12/19 12:17 AM |
| 30 | OLD or IRL - basically no difference - here's whyFor #1 and 2: it’s true that it’s the same men but I find they approach certain apps in a certain way (and IRL vs OLD). In the same way they show up differently to a dive bar date vs a high end restaurant. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/12/19 11:06 PM |
| 60 | What are your biggest pet peeves from men’s OLD profiles?His photos are all ones with a woman he has cropped out. It just shows he has no life or real friends. Same if it’s all car selfies but the ones with the exes cut out bother me more. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/12/19 11:03 PM |
| 15 | He wanted to pay but I paid my own foodIsn’t that just dancing around it in order to make him feel better and let you feel less direct? You shouldn’t be making excuses. I would only use the second sentience. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 06:06 PM |
| 60 | Men should be bodyshamed moreBut he’s a nice guy! Literally, the bare minimum above sentient being - a nice guy! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 02:55 PM |
| 20 | How to keep the same energy with a HVM after commitment/marriage?I meant more that the entire relationship becomes too transactional and people are keeping score. If he’s really a HVM, by the time you marry it seems like you should have some degree of trust (that he earned, now keeps, and grows). Some marriages truly are transactional and more so in certain cultures, of course. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 02:54 PM |
| 35 | Poly/Open Relationships: A RantAs a divorced woman dating in suburbia, this aggravates me to no end. So many of these men. I don’t care what the excuse is. You have no business dating if you can’t get divorced. Applies to my female friends too. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 02:48 PM |
| 8 | Always try to focus on your own success first. 💅Yes! Friends and I would talk about how it takes more effort for us to achieve the same success and income, so we should expect our equal to be more successful. Now, I will accept a man who is passionate in something and successful in another way, as long as he is still financially independent. But he needs to show he is accomplished in whatever that thing is. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 02:45 PM |
| 54 | How to keep the same energy with a HVM after commitment/marriage?If I were to do it again: making sure he knows you are caring for him bc you want to, not bc he needs it. The Hapless Husband trope is my pet peeve from married friends, movies, etc. Also tell him that you would have appreciated that he did XYZ or even expected him too. But in all of this, don’t be scolding or passive aggressive. That sets up the mothering dynamic. It’s hard to do this while also not being transactional and losing the romance. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 02:42 PM |
| 46 | Always try to focus on your own success first. 💅Men: “I want a woman who knows what she wants and doesn’t expect me to support her financially” Me: “I’m a VP in a $9B org, have an MBA, own 2 homes, and saving for retirement.” Men: “you’re too intimidating. Why are you trying to be like a man. Women who are that successful are usually too cold.” Me: “you’re paying half your income in alimony. Sorry you can’t live my lifestyle.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 02:37 PM |
| 16 | Poly/Open Relationships: A RantI think that it’s the same as commenting on other dating norms that shouldn’t be tolerated. Or that we shouldn’t start confirming ourselves to. I think a lot of the popularity we are seeing is men embracing something because it works to their advantage. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 02:31 PM |
| 79 | Poly/Open Relationships: A Rantthe “unfair to rely on one person” really speaks volumes about the person saying it | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 02:24 PM |
| 38 | Poly/Open Relationships: A RantI really love the “separated” people that are still living together. Actually one married my ex husband! When they started dating, we were still living in separate levels of the house until we figured out the moving situation about 3 weeks later. (He didn’t bring her home). She’s a nice enough person but I always wonder how that made him a catch?! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 02:16 PM |
| 81 | Poly/Open Relationships: A RantI have so many thoughts on Poly. I won’t say “opinions” bc I know there’s a variety of definitions out there and people will throw in all of their own positive experiences as the real truth about poly. Hey, we do this about regular marriage too. Ultimately, I feel like Poly is so many women thirsty to appear woke. And like a lot of libfem, convincing themselves they have so much control and power (I’m not full radfem though). I just wish they would put it up front on their OLD profile. I don’t w… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/12/19 12:57 PM |
| 12 | HELP! Polyamory + HVM (Long, but I really need help here)Polyamory generally isn’t in line with radfem. Because it’s usually practiced as polygyny (the exception being lesbian polyamory). In the aggregate, poly is not good for women and upholds a lot of patriarchal tropes. It looks like a bunch of woke people and then you find the women whose consent was manipulated or women who lose out down the line despite all of their investment in the relationship. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/12/19 01:27 AM |
| 24 | HELP! Polyamory + HVM (Long, but I really need help here)Based on the last paragraph, I think poly is your shield from the potential of being hurt and finding true intimacy. It’s not easy to date as a single mom (I know). We all have baggage. Divorce is common. We all worry if someone is out of our league. You’re investing your time and emotions. When life is good and easy, that’s fine. A man who has someone else can’t make that same investment in you. That will always become more apparent when life is rough. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/12/19 10:46 PM |
| 26 | Star Wars: Another Reminder That Popular Culture (written by men) teaches women to normalize abuse as “love”.It was a really artificial moment in the movie too. Really captures how much this has been taught to be accepted as normal. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/12/19 04:21 PM |
| 11 | Potential quality guy wants to fly me out to meetBesides the safety aspect, this just sends the message that he is more important. If he wants to meet, then he comes to you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/12/19 04:31 AM |
| 32 | Man threatens to murder his own sister if she grows up to be promiscuous. THIS IS WHY YOU DONT TELL MEN JACKSHIT ABOUT YOUR SEXUAL HISTORY.Not at all. It’s really common identified behavior for child sex abusers. It’s often seen as misguided protective behavior when in reality it’s evidence of criminal deviant behavior. I wouldn’t lob that accusation lightly. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/12/19 03:45 PM |
| 261 | Man threatens to murder his own sister if she grows up to be promiscuous. THIS IS WHY YOU DONT TELL MEN JACKSHIT ABOUT YOUR SEXUAL HISTORY.Pretty big red flag for him sexually abusing her | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/12/19 02:28 AM |
| 15 | Ladies, I need your judgement free help!Consider how B approached you if you were single. He was presumptuous, moved too fast, and not forthright with his feelings. Now consider that he knows you’re in a relationship and he was still all of those things. However it is making you re evaluate what you want from A, so I would focus on that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/12/19 12:52 AM |
| 8 | What the fuck is this shit. Translation of his text “all the Iranians...” what about it???This is the only emoji my mother uses. I’m so glad I’m not the only one who thinks it’s creepy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/12/19 03:19 AM |
| 5 | The rise of the 'married single mom'Yes! I have 50/50 custody and a good job. I’m even careful about how I throw around the “single mom” phrase. It’s a much different situation than how my mom did it, alone and in poverty. Although the weight of the mental stress is the same, just less of it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/19 10:57 AM |
| 22 | The rise of the 'married single mom'While the article explains it, I really hate when married women call themselves single moms. They have a husband who isn’t helpful or not present or some version of that. I understand their struggle and I get what they’re saying, but I hate them using the phrase. In many of these cases of work, the couple has chosen this life. They’ve decided this is the job that will support their lifestyle. Single moms, even those with good jobs, have to consider every day that there is no other adult to pick … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/19 10:58 PM |
| 29 | The rise of the 'married single mom'As a woman who travels a lot for work and is on the receiving end of these unsuccessful propositions... yes they do. A lot. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/19 10:53 PM |
| 7 | Did I go to far?Not at all. There is nothing appealing about that exchange. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/11/19 11:01 PM |
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