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Lyanina Archive

View 0 posts and 3,047 comments by Lyanina on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Yep.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/19 09:03 AM
2

Bonus question for the young women: Are you taking advantage of your "best years"? Sure. I'm pretty satisfied with what my romantic life has been like so far. I know I can end a relationship that isn't satisfying. I know I can survive being dumped by someone I still love. I know I have a boyfriend who loves me more than anything and wants to build a life with me. I know that I'm young and still have room to grow and learn, and I'm fine with how things have gone so far. I will graduate in a few m…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/19 06:58 PM
1

That's the one! He's great, but romance wasn't on my radar at all in those circumstances.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/19 09:42 AM
2

Does he know he pursued me and initiated and that I never would have? Of course. We met abroad. If he hadn't made his interest known and deliberately pursued me, I'd have forgotten about him a few weeks after going home. It would never have occurred to me to consider a relationship with some guy who lived super far away that I had met on a short trip.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/19 09:41 AM
0

Dumped him, mostly.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/19 10:01 PM
4

I've made a couple men cry yeah. Didn't lose respect for them. Tended to end up crying with them; it's contagious like that. I've made my boyfriend cry several times. I'm amazed he puts up with me mostly.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/19 09:18 PM
1

I don't know if I would be less satisfied but I'd probably be single, or with a woman who'd approached me. My boyfriend initiated our relationship. I would not have bothered to go after him had he not. I'm into him, sure, but if he hadn't first made it clear how into me he was I doubt I'd have lost any sleep thinking about him.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/19 05:57 PM
2

Yeah, I was trying to imagine it and thought the exact same thing. Just... nah.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/19 01:02 PM
2

Definitely school. I met 100% of my SOs through classes or uni-related events. Better hang on to the boyfriend because I'm graduating soon.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/19 11:49 AM
0

Yeah, I understood the first time. Adequate way to fulfill their sexual urges doesn't sound any better.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/19 11:25 AM
1

It's sexy to be wanted. They won't mind doing it Excuse me while I go throw up.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/19 07:15 AM
2

I mean, obviously I care about what my SO thinks about my appearance. I don't want him to feel embarrassed but mainly I want him to be into me. I think I'm pretty hot and I will make some effort to be attractive to him. I shave because he prefers it; I wouldn't do it for myself. He recently commented he was afraid I was getting too skinny, so I asked if he preferred me a couple kilos ago because I find my weight fairly easy to change and a few kilos higher isn't where I prefer to be, but I would…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/19 04:16 PM
2

I wouldn't want to be a stepmom. I wouldn't date someone with kids because if someone age-appropriate has kids and is no longer with their partner, they either fucked up several times or have priorities that don't align with mine. It's not that I would hate the kids. But there are so many decent potential partners out there that don't have kids; no reason to burden myself with unnecessary problems like not having true parental authority but having most of the responsibilites of a parent and an e…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/19 04:07 PM
3

I think I have to agree. My boyfriend used to complain he didn't feel like I needed him. I never saw what the big deal was; I didn't want to need him. I don't really need anyone except for my parents (and I expect to gain independence from that soon). Unfortunately we have recently had the opportunity to realize that I am, in fact, the only one willing to walk away from this relationship, and that he does think he needs me. He gave me an ultimatum, I chose the option that didn't include him, and…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/19 04:55 PM
3

1) I'm 1m65. He says he's 1m75. I have been attracted to and dated people shorter than him (and, in fact, shorter than me). I know it's not a factor to me. He always comments on how small I am (I'm not, but "smaller than him" counts as small to him, I guess), so I'm sure he likes it, though I don't think being taller would be a dealbreaker. 2) I'm 22, he's 3.5 years older. I prefer to stick closer to my age but the difference is tolerable. I don't think he'd be into me if I were a decade older.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/18 05:01 PM
3

I'm in my 20s and at this age kids in a guy would be an automatic dealbreaker. However I once saw my boyfriend give a class (in his sport of choice) to a little kid and the kid had a nonexistent attention span and was pretty annoying, but my boyfriend was super, super patient and sweet with him. I melted. So there's something about the right kind of interaction with kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/18 04:35 PM
1

What kind of dinner party do you find people like that at? Impressive.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/18 10:52 AM
1

Positive: Fit Smart Physically affectionate Has the cutest fucking accent Very willing to compromise and even sacrifice Negative: Clingy Likes wearing a beard Extrovert. Has too many friends and delights in dragging me to events with lots of people. Impatient Anxiety or depression or some other undiagnosed issue -- not actually at disorder level, in my completely unprofessional opinion, but he should still consult.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/18 09:37 PM
5

1 - Never 2 - Virtually never. I almost never think about past partners. I do compare experiences in a "Oh, I'd never done that like that" way. 3 - Has only gotten better. The less sex I have, the less I care for it; but the enjoyment increases a looot when I have it a looot.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/18 01:50 PM
4

Indeed. I would rather go to the dentist.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/18 02:33 PM
1

I've been in one for more than 2.5 years. We met in person on holiday. We're from different countries, and he recently moved to be 2 hours away from me. I don't think it's a superior form of relationship but it's doable and can be worth it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/18 08:24 PM
2

Flirting isn't always initiated as a conversation opener with a stranger. You can start flirting several minutes or hours into a conversation. You can flirt with a friend. You can keep flirting with a SO months or years into the relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/18 08:09 AM
1

They tend to look very different from me, have different hobbies and interests but similar education. They are usually more extroverted than I am, sometimes by a lot. I don't consciously look for a type but these are the people it's easiest for me to hit it off with -- extroverts to get me out of my shell, similar or identical education so we meet and spend time together naturally (I'm a student).
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/18 07:51 AM
2

I'm sure it's pretty common. I do this too.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/18 08:55 AM
1

When I'm single I don't date. I meet someone within my social circle, we click, we hang out in groups and social situations, we flirt, there's mutual interest, we end up alone after a group event or deliberately set up a one-on-one hang out, we're totally crushing on each other, eventually we make out, and we start going out. So yeah, one at a time. I would feel so artificial setting up dates with several people I wasn't interested in yet. If I'm interested in someone, I'm interested in them. If…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/18 03:45 PM
2

I think the phrase itself is stupid. As for the mindset, I believe there are many people who will never cheat. I don't believe cheating is an in the moment thing, it's a series of decisions. I don't believe there is no situation in which I would cheat. I have emotionally cheated in the past, anyway. I came clean about it and he hardly cared. It wasn't about tingles or SMV but about a very vulnerable guy whom I chose to get too close to while telling myself I could save him. If I were to do it ag…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/18 02:52 PM
1

Not at this point in my life, but probably yes if I'm dating at 30+.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/18 12:02 PM
3

I've been cat-called, of course. In the street, from a window, from a car. I have not been groped by a stranger, or threatened with sexual assault. Once a guy knocked on the window of my (ground-floor) living room, where I was having tea on the couch and chatting with my roommates who were in the kitchen (it was an open-plan design), to get my attention so I could see him masturbating furiously through the window. I suppose that could count as "because of my gender" because I don't think he'd ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/18 02:25 PM
2

It's not like I think in terms of "SMV vs RMV" when getting into a relationship. Nor do I think, "I want to settle down" or "I want this to be a LTR." I am relationship-oriented, but I don't mind breaking things off after a little while if I realize we're not a good fit. I'm 22, have been with my boyfriend for a bit over 2 years now, and I'd like this to be the marriage-and-family deal if it works out (but I'm not agonizing over it or anything; we're young). When we met I was very very attracted…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/18 05:55 PM
6

Similar thresholds for me. There's not really a reason why in the sense that I don't think it has to indicate something "bad" -- but it causes an ick gut reaction.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/18 02:30 PM
1

Thank you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/18 08:36 PM
2

You can talk about Gone with the Wind instead.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/18 08:01 PM
3

Yeah. I have no trouble admitting I'm almost always on my phone texting someone but they're not thirsty guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/18 02:38 PM
3

I mean, I know I could create an account and get a lot of heys. I don't care about heys so, no, not really. If there were like 10 guys I was attracted to and compatible with who were interested in a LTR with me, sure that would probably affect the level of "dread" a partner would be able to inflict on me. But that's not what happens with dating sites.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/18 11:04 PM
3

hi sexy
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/18 10:39 PM
8

I prefer to meet people offline so personally, nope. I see your point; obviously social media and online dating have affected people, but me... not really. Except for messaging apps; those have been indispensable. I had a brief stint on OkCupid after my last breakup and ended up using the "block straight people from seeing my profile" function because I got tired of receiving a bunch of "heys" from straight dudes every day. And then I just deactivated my profile because, yeah, I was not desperat…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/18 10:18 PM
2

See also
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/18 02:14 PM
3

I would mind if it was something he'd lied to me about. Not if he told me early on, or if it was something he'd just come to terms with. Many many women would be repulsed regardless of when he told them. It's a thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/18 06:29 PM
1

This frog says thanks while she is still mostly sober.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/18 06:57 PM
1

World Champions.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/18 06:25 PM
2

Hell no, the final is tomorrow, I'm still talking about football.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/18 06:23 PM
1

Ah, right. My boyfriend is also supporting France "for me." Very half-heartedly I'm sure. I tend to support Germany when France and Belgium are out, but that didn't happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/18 10:34 PM
1

Why are you for les Bleus? Not that I'm complaining -- so hyped.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/18 09:35 PM
3

1 red, 2 and 3 clear the looks threshold so yellow. No such thing as green based on a picture. 7, probably.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/18 08:35 PM
2

So about that coming home status...
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/18 09:33 PM
3

Brazil.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/18 08:38 PM
3

Fuck yes. Allez les Bleus !
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/18 08:33 PM
5

Doubt it.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 09:47 PM
3

In the words of my SO when I asked him whether he would say I was a feminist: "Being a feminist is like being a football club supporter. It's all about saying you are." That's pretty much what it means to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 09:39 PM
3

You can read the thread for yourself, plenty of comments for and against. I found it an interesting thread back then. It was not "my idea" and I'm fine with the way things are currently, ie legal abortion and no "legal paternity surrender," but it's one way of interpreting the concept (and, to date, the only one I've seen) that I could see myself not being opposed to. ETA: Not before every sexual relation in case they have children -- but before every sexual relation (if ONS; longer term but ren…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 08:55 PM
2

I have no idea what you're talking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 08:53 PM
3

Behind an individual woman wanting to have an abortion, not behind abortion being legal.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 08:46 PM
12

Can you explain why you only support one? "Men and women are different." There is no reason for abortion to be "fair." "Financial abortion" is a guy signing a piece of paper to walk away from a pregnancy. Actual abortion is not. Abortion prevents the child from existing. "Financial abortion" prevents the existing child from receiving the financial support of both parents. The two situations are so different I don't see what's confusing about supporting one but not the other. Would you be very co…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 08:44 PM
4

I was disagreeing with the OP's understanding of "the reasoning often given," not making a statement beyond that (which is why this is under automod). The idea behind abortion is not "women choosing not to have to pay for a child."
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 08:38 PM
8

I disagree. The usual reasoning for abortion is bodily autonomy, and obviously you don't use that argument for "financial abortion." The usual argument against "financial abortion" is probably something about an existing child deserving both parents' financial support. The two have nothing to do with each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 08:30 PM
4

That must be it. Thank you for explaining, I'd never have guessed.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 08:01 PM
1

Every time I see the word pillosphere
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 07:58 PM
5

He passes my physical attractiveness threshold, but the few interactions we've had failed to make me develop any sort of attraction, so nope. I've never felt anything stronger than mild annoyance for him and haven't spoken to him in almost 3 years. In general he doesn't struggle with women though.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 07:56 PM
1

Has been legal in France since 1975, so way before I was born. I get to watch the Senate debate an abortion bill in Argentina this year and I find it fascinating.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 07:27 PM
3

I've been told he's the type, yeah. But I don't think he has a "neutral" personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 05:55 PM
5

He looks almost exactly like a guy I know, impressive. And no. If his personality is "neutral" I'm not going to be thinking about sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 05:44 PM
3

Why "should" a woman be able to get pregnant and not a man?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/18 04:25 PM
5

Would this behaviour ever be considered as genuine? Or would there be some hidden agenda in a woman doing this. What, do you think a woman can never be interested in a man?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/18 11:11 PM
2

Best fucking day of my year here when France knocked out Argentina. Allez les Bleus ! Are you supporting England ? Plutôt mourir.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/18 06:12 PM
5

He makes great Korean food. 25/10, would marry again And with reason. Yum.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/18 04:49 PM
5

He doesn't have a 6 pack, isn't 6 feet tall, and won't let me measure his dick. Also he thinks 12 000km away from him for a year is enough and doesn't support me living around the world without him for years on end. Party pooper.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/18 04:10 PM
5

Probably not. If they outright rejected me I would move on. I have a hard time imagining not being completely over them by the time it took me to lose 40 pounds. I'd understand why they didn't find me attractive before, obviously, but I don't think I'd still like them. I'd get an ego boost from their new interest though! If however they were just someone I had a crush on but I never made a move and they only made a move once I became attractive, sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/18 08:17 PM
1

How do you tell if someone complements you?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/18 06:03 PM
7

What did I just read Thank you o_o
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/18 05:41 PM
3

Complements, then.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/18 05:35 PM
1

Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/18 11:11 AM
3

Not cold approaches? Rarely, because if I actually know a guy and spend time with him, he ends up learning pretty quickly that I have a boyfriend. Also IME guys I get to know "organically" don't come right out and ask me out, they would kind of try to flirt or drop hints before that and if they didn't already know I had a boyfriend by then that would be when I told them. That said, it's happened once this year that I had a guy I was hanging out with and becoming friends with confess feelings for…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/18 01:05 AM
2

If my SO suddenly started wanting sex 20 times less intensely or less often I'm pretty sure we'd have a problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/18 09:43 PM
3

I like coconut though.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/18 07:00 PM
2

You said "your partner" though. Don't really consider a SO one of the "pesky horny men."
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/18 06:58 PM
8

Women, would you like your partner to use it? What's supposed to be gained from that, a dead bedroom relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/18 03:25 PM
4

Transgender man = trans man = FtM He's a dude "now"
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/18 03:19 PM
1

Por que essa pergunta? I'm from France and currently in Argentina. Found a nation even less willing (and/or less able) to speak English than we are.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/18 06:12 PM
1

I was going to say the overwhelming majority of men I know don't speak English well enough for me to suspect them of having been red-pilled online, but then I remembered the impressive amount of barely readable comments on PPD.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/18 05:52 PM
3

Marriage material is boyfriend material + long term goals (including travel, finances and family-related) and values aligned, ability and desire to commit to building a life together and grow together. Boyfriend material is someone I'm physically attracted to, enjoy spending time with, and find interesting and relatable. If gun-to-the-head I had to marry one of your 3 ridiculous hypothetical men today, I would pick 1 if I'm attracted to him, 2 if low or medium N.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/18 09:08 AM
2

Is there any benefit in a man showing you interest when you have already decided you aren't attracted to him? No. If I know there's no way I can be attracted to him, guess what, there's no way I can be attracted to him. If I'm going out of my way to avoid him... lol. But there can be a benefit if she's just meh. She's not attracted to him, because he hasn't done anything to generate attraction yet, but she's not repulsed either.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/18 06:18 PM
3

Hell yes the hoodies. 😍
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/18 07:09 PM
4

I don't think the idea is that men will start wanting older single mothers more. I read it more like OP did, especially because of this sentence: it’ll be the men who will be scrambling to lock down a woman to have kids with before she ups and has kids on her own
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/18 03:05 PM
6

Please.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/18 08:07 PM
2

Mm, I didn't know that. Learning languages can be fun; it's happened a couple times that I said something completely innocent to a friend only to have them freeze, then laugh at me because nope, Lya, that's sexual.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/18 05:57 PM
5

Sshhhhh.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/18 05:51 PM
8

If I came across a woman who spent a lot of time complaining about lack of dating success I would most likely come to the conclusion that there's something wrong with her. Not necessarily "low status" but probably an attitude problem or a mismatch between her expectations and her status. And yeah I definitely think people who complain about there being no good men or that women only want Chad when talking about their dating life are not high-status. Also please it's à la.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/18 04:55 PM
5

Chasing a man is a terrible strategy. For instance - if you meet a girl in real life and ask her out very quickly (once you establish some chemistry) she may say yes - but won't be as enthusiastic as she'll be if she's spent a lot of time sending clear signals of interest, or has mysteriously shown up at events where you are and then you finally ask her out. Probably because the first barely knows you exist, but the second already knows she likes you.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/18 12:20 PM
4

Are you sure?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/18 11:18 AM
2

She didn't I'm not talking about your specific friend, but answering your What have they been doing? where "they" referred to unmarried 23yo. Idk why you're so anxious That was only my first reply on your thread... I answered a question that seemed really weird to me. Hardly anxious.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/18 11:17 AM
8

23 is still young enough that the question is surprising. They've probably had a couple STRs and LTRs, maybe some casual sex but for most, not "a ton". Maybe they're already in a relationship with the person they'll eventually marry. I'm 22, have never had a ONS or FWB, and will certainly not be married (or engaged) by 23.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/18 03:44 AM
10

Don't worry, in this thread your English isn't the problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/18 03:13 PM
1

I didn't, so I covered a few more bases in my reply.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/18 11:14 AM
2

OP said not richer or hotter. I gave a few situations in which my answer would be yes, implying a no in others.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/18 11:03 AM
3

Probably not, but it depends on why they initially rejected me. If I was like depressed or a bitch and am in a better place or a nicer person 2 years later, I could be pretty understanding. Or if they were in the closet and not ready to date. Or something sappy like they were afraid of risking our friendship but then realized they couldn't deny their feelings any longer, lol. I could romanticize the fuck out of that. In most cases though I would probably have very successfully lost all interest …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/18 02:47 AM
6

If I know she isn't sexually attracted to my brother and only wants to marry him because she's desperate for commitment, I would advise him against staying in the relationship. Duh. That's not what your OP stated. And realistically, I doubt I'll ever be in a situation to know that. Maybe I know she had sex with a bouncer in a nightclub, but can't really measure her sexual attraction to my brother. Most likely, I neither know nor care about her sexual past. I stand by my original comment, in whic…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/18 01:54 AM
2

I used to use that label online, mostly on an LGBT community that was full of even weirder labels (aromantic sapiosexual anyone?). Offline I've always stuck with bisexual though; never wanted it to be treated like a big deal. Never met anyone offline claiming to be pan but it's not much of a thing outside of the anglosphere.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/18 01:22 AM
9

If you can rewrite that in a language that more closely resembles English, I will be able to reply.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/18 01:16 AM
11

He has no clue but in your OP there's nothing that says I know she isn't attracted to him. If he tells me she told him she's a virgin or has never had casual sex and that's why he waited six months to have sex and I know it's false, I'd call her out on the lie and consider it a red flag... but if all I know is she has had casual sex and now wants a serious relationship and my brother loves her, why on earth would I think twice about it?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/18 01:12 AM
8

If she just had a lot of casual sex and they seemed happy and in love I wouldn't get involved. I wouldn't even know about her past because that's weird, but if I did I certainly wouldn't waste any time thinking about it. If I suspected she didn't love him and wasn't actually committed to him and he came to me for advice, I would give him my reasons. The decision would be up to him though; he's a grown man. Sometimes you have to let people make a mistake. If I witnessed her treating him badly, be…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/18 12:56 AM
3

There's a non-negligible subset of women who do it with some regularity, and another subset of women who have done it once or twice. I would say the majority of women are not doing it (and certainly not often) and there are many who wouldn't bang a stranger, but because of the aforementioned group it certainly happens often.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/18 01:00 PM
9

What are your views A few years ago, for some reason, I started following a few trans youtubers and around the same time I was active on an online LGBT community. I sympathized with what I imagined these trans people were going through. Since then a childhood friend came out as transgender, and then of course there was my ex. That hasn't really affected my view. Is it innate or a choice ? Genetic or Environmental ? Part of the normal variation of humankind ? Or an aberrant oddity ? More nature t…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/18 11:41 PM
7

To you, maybe. I found it relevant to post. The OPs read very differently.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/18 12:59 PM
5

The man's OP for more context.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/18 11:50 AM
1

I have no excuse for the same reason. Still judging hard. Yeah, I imagine a French PPD would be at least as painful to read... Let's not start that.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/18 10:22 PM
1

That's interesting, I would have said the exact opposite. As long as a guy is "tall enough" more height wouldn't do as much for me as more prettiness.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/18 08:19 PM
8

Why take known celebrities as examples of pure physical attractiveness? Usually there are other factors that lead to fangirling. Adam Driver wins that one, but that's not relevant. Based on pure physical attractiveness, like looking at a picture, or being faced with two guys standing perfectly still in identical poses and without saying a word, 10/10 face and "acceptable" height any day. If a guy is "tall enough" for me any additional height wouldn't do as much for him as a hotter face would. Yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/18 05:55 PM
1

I feel you, but hey, at least visits are crazy full of lustful sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/18 04:05 PM
1

For some women insertion cause cramps yeah (mine was fine; painful during the insertion but not afterwards). Removal not so much usually, though you're right it can still happen. I thought it was strange that that was your exception but if you meant debilitating cramps then obviously yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/18 03:14 PM
14

No one "taught" me my sexuality is responsive or that if I don't feel loving I won't want sex, any more than my boyfriend was "taught" seeing a pretty girl naked makes him hard. "Maintenance" sex is a thing and expecting a candlelit dinner before sex every time is ridiculous, but women can't just decide to have a more active sex drive. They can know what gets them in the mood and encourage situations like that in a relationship. They can initiate sex even when they're not really in the mood. Is …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/18 03:01 PM
3

What's an IUD removal got to do with it?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/18 02:44 PM
9

Are you not understand that a man she pays to have sex with her isn't able to please her sexually? A sexual experience in which they are not desired is repulsive to most women. Even if his ability to please her played no role at all, your CMV would still be wrong because "not valuing a man's ability to please her sexually" isn't the reason why there isn't much demand from women for male sex workers.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/18 09:18 PM
6

A lot of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/18 09:09 PM
6

You must be deliberately ignoring what people are telling you here. A prostitute's "skills" are not what make for a good sexual experience for the vast majority of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/18 09:08 PM
8

I shouldn't judge but oh my god there are too many regular posters with horrible English or typing skills on the sub. My eyes.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/18 06:15 PM
1

Feels weird receiving congrats since I haven't done anything, but what a relief... We're so happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/18 03:33 AM
2

Nah, that's crazy.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/18 01:58 PM
3

interesting nonetheless I'm listening, what's the interesting part?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/18 01:56 AM
6

HE GOT THE JOB. Posted a while back about boyfriend going to a job interview. In September we will have 150km between us (as opposed to anything from 750 km to 12000 km since the beginning of our relationship more than 2 years ago). It still seems like a lot to zero-distance couples but for us it means a two-hour train ride to visit and being able to see each other every weekend. Huge step forward in my book. We are also spending New Year's 2018/2019 with my parents again. This boy loves me beca…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/18 06:42 PM
4

I'd end up in a dead bedroom. Or just single with no libido.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/18 11:55 PM
6

Doesn't work like that for many people (most of them women). Personally the less I have sex, the less I crave it; the more I have it the more I want it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/18 11:34 PM
1

Nope. If I were ever to donate eggs, I would do it for free, not for a surrogate (if the option to choose was available), and after I'd already had children or decided I didn't want any of my own. But I don't even want to take hormonal birth control, so the fertility drugs and the idea of hyperstimulating my ovaries really don't appeal to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/18 11:55 PM
3

Oh sure, if she says despite that it's a demonstration of her commitment and love. Sorry, that's not how I read it; I was thinking I wouldn't feel loved or committed to. And I don't equal passion with love or commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/18 04:41 PM
1

I've never dated a bad boy and don't intend to but it's easy to see what's appealing about them to some people. The unpredictability is a big part of it IMO. Keeps you on your toes. Wouldn't say it's about activities really, more the uncertainty of what he feels, whether he's going to text. Makes you laugh, makes you feel loved, makes you doubt, makes you feel on top of the world again, makes you scared... The emotional rollercoaster is the addicting part. What activities did you and the fun guy…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/18 04:39 PM
3

I agree that that's probably "most exciting" but I would hate it and it's certainly not how I would measure love or commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/18 04:28 PM
7

I'm always surprised that so many people answer the survey when you always see the same people commenting. Also someone refused to say UK is in Europe.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/18 03:55 PM
1

Fuck yes Iceland. Loved the match.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/18 03:14 PM
2

Sorry! Fear of missing out. Not a PPD-specific acronym for once.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/18 11:47 PM
15

The virgin at 25 would be less of a visceral turn-off to me than the guy with 20+ partners. Realistically I would probably pick neither but if you forced me to choose, I'd much much prefer to go with the one with 0 past partners. above what number Depends on age, though I think 20+ will be a visceral turn-off to me at any age. I'm a low sociosexuality type so the thought of sleeping with 20 people repulses me and the thought of sleeping with someone who's slept with 20 people isn't appealing eit…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/18 11:34 PM
5

That guy sounds like he's full of shit honestly.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/18 09:12 PM
2

To be honest I've forgotten why but I'm sure that's not it. It's more likely to be: a) because the amount of time it took him to get in caused him despair, b) because of my paaainful cramps (a charitable interpretation), c) a joke about his performance (feels he orgasms too fast or I take too long), d) an inability to call anything sexual by its actual name, or e) all of the above
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/18 02:38 PM
1

I receive (feel) love mostly through Quality Time and Words of Affirmation and express it with Words of Affirmation and Touch. He expresses his with Words of Affirmation and Gifts, and I think he receives with Touch and Quality Time. IMO ours not naturally fully aligned but I only have to mention when I feel a bit neglected Quality Time-wise and it works so eh. We also compete on gifts which is fun. I've never doubted that he loves me since he said it for the first time so it at least works in t…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/18 09:40 AM
3

Yes, IMO this is exactly how most women approach this.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/18 10:56 PM
7

My boyfriend calls my vagina the "cave of despair" -- I must be approaching The Wall! I'm okay with the prospect of working at Azkaban I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/18 09:00 PM
1

I would like a link to that remarkable comment because I honestly don't remember saying such a true thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/18 08:59 PM
11

While single, did you ever feel some loneliness or anything analogue that led you to consider a relationship? No. I have felt lonely before but the only thing that would lead me to "consider" a relationship is meeting someone I'd want to be in a relationship with. When I was lonely it wasn't out of lack of romantic affection. If you never felt such a loneliness or it never gave birth to such a drive, are you aware of some traits that, if present in a man, would cause your interest in a monogamou…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/18 02:51 PM
2

I don't get asked out constantly by hot strangers if that's what you mean. True. So if that's what you wanted to hear, sure. But I can count on the fingers of one hand the times where I've felt strong attraction to someone I'd just met (or in two cases, hadn't met yet), and I ended up dating two of them... months after we'd met. It's not that they didn't "want" me or I didn't "want" them but we just didn't do relationships that way. I look at people I don't know and think interesting, not I want…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/18 12:53 PM
5

I mean sure you can break up, but I've never felt the desire to be in a relationship with someone I'd only met recently because they were hot. I started dating my first boyfriend after knowing him for about a month, not because he was hot (he was normal, not so physically attractive I had to date him), but because we were inexperienced teens and he was into me and made it obvious and I was flattered and curious. Since then, curiosity hasn't been a factor again so I haven't entered a relationship…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/18 02:28 AM
4

No. I've never considered, or had, a relationship with someone I'd only known for a few days. I did only know my first boyfriend for about a month in my teens before we started going out. That relationship was decidedly not based on strong physical attraction on my part. Physical attraction is not enough for me to consider a relationship. The initial feeling tends to be curiosity, and a sort of pull to get closer to them and find out more about them, sometimes a desire to kiss them, rather than …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/18 02:19 AM
6

Same, I'm very surprised.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/18 02:18 AM
1

Asked explicitly saying the word "date"? Never. Asked someone I was interested in but wasn't in a relationship with yet to grab drinks, dinner, or a movie? A handful of times. Asked said someone to spend time hanging out one on one for the first time? Once. Been asked out, as per my first definition, never; as per the last, maybe 5 times. Strangers who approach me usually don't get the time to get to the asking me out bit, so I mostly get asked out by the really fast strangers or by people I kno…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/18 12:58 AM
3

And what makes you think she doesn't initiate foreplay? He also knows she needs it to get into it, and they foreplay together. What kind of idea of sex do you have? Read again. For several of us in this thread we go along with it knowing that's the first step to getting ourselves "involved emotionally" if by that you mean, wanting sex, being aroused, feeling into it, feeling intimate. But just thinking, Hey I should get aroused now isn't going to get us anywhere closer to the goal.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/18 12:16 AM
1

Yep, definitely. If there was no hope I'd pick the lazy option and for me that's definitely starfish PIV after handing him the lube.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/18 12:00 AM
5

How is it selfish to say you need foreplay to be aroused? Most people can't just switch their arousal on and off at will.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 11:57 PM
1

I mean, that's pretty much what the answers quoted in OP are. "That's kind of gross" reflects my visceral reaction well.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 06:35 PM
4

I almost always give enthusiastic consent. Usually, it's genuine. Sometimes, I am not all that enthused on the inside, but will still give all the signs of enthusiasm when they initiate, because I don't want them to have any doubt that I'm consenting (which I am, deliberately). Mostly this happens when they are ready for sex but foreplay (mental or physical) has been minimal. In those cases I am not dreading sex and I know chances are high I will reach both arousal and enthusiasm at some point. …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 06:32 PM
2

High libido or higher libido than the other partner in a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 06:09 PM
3

Can't anyone, even a man? It's not that hard to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 04:59 PM
1

Thanks, I'll put those in my calendar!
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 04:57 PM
2

Yeah. I'm younger than his age range and hardly inclined to feminist rants but his post came off as icky to me. Don't need to be 30 to be turned off by it and I'm sure he knew that when he posted it.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 04:49 PM
3

Can we go back to slut week or whatever instead of r/relationships outrage porn week?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 04:39 PM
7

Probably exactly what he got.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 03:41 PM
2

My boyfriend orgasms so easily that if he didn't I would ask if I'd done something wrong. When I orgasm, he asks what he did right. Even though in both cases it doesn't have to be a performance issue, it's a reasonable question.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 01:24 PM
2

Q4W: How good are you at faking orgasms and why is this a PPD discussion?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 11:57 AM
4

I was wondering the same thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/18 11:12 AM
2

OP most definitely did not coin that.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/18 11:19 PM
4

I'm absolutely terrible at the rating people thing. I just spent 5 minutes on Google and was like "Is he a 5? Nah, those ears are kind of cute... This one could be a 6, but he reminds me a bit of my boyfriend, so that has to make him an 8..." So yeah, I'm just going to look at the pics other people post and agree or disagree. For instance, I think your first 5 is cuter than your first two 6s, and some of your 7s are at least 8s to me, but I guess that's personal taste. I agree they're attractive…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/18 10:37 PM
4

I cannot fathom deciding to marry someone I would choose to leave if I lost sexual attraction to them. It's probably "valid" to end a marriage for whatever reason, but I would think less of someone if they told me they left a marriage because they weren't sexually attracted to their spouse anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/18 08:15 PM
13

Ew, and that's about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/18 04:13 PM
2

u/EmoryUpton has a comic to link.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/18 12:21 AM
4

You speak for me blah, blah.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 11:56 PM
4

Women who frequently date assholes will complain about their experiences with assholes. Color me surprised. I am so confused right now as to why this might be. Sure many of them probably chose poorly. So what. When someone my mother thought was a friend treated her poorly she complained about it. People will do that. most men can barely even get a single partner. Citation needed. Or, to put it plainly, this is bullshit.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 11:52 PM
3

So many posts from the relationships sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 08:29 PM
5

In porn. One hot naked woman in porn = aroused dude. Two hot naked women in porn = aroused dude. One naked man plus one hot naked woman in porn = aroused dude having to look at another man's penis going into hot naked woman. Or worse, at his ass and balls.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 05:13 PM
2

Well shit. Good luck. I hope he's cute. Sometimes I feel if I talk to parents too often I'll become childfree.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 03:25 PM
3

Yeah, even at 160cm, 45 is low so it seems strange to have a 45-55 range. I have a short, Asian aunt, 1.55m. She calculates her ideal weight using "10kg less than the number formed by the two digits after the decimal point in your height," so 55 - 10 = 45kg. She is usually a little bit above that and she is tiny. 45kg would put her at the lower limit of a healthy weight... and she's shorter than 160cm. Something like 165 and 55kg isn't unhealthy or crazy or anything. I think that presented with …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 03:21 PM
1

Why Finding Dory?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 03:08 PM
19

They have probably visited TRP more times this month than i have. Are these people weird? Undoubtedly. It is also weird to count how many of the top posts there come from a single user. And it's pretty damn weird to post on PPD. What are your thoughts on people who frequent /r/TheBluePill ? I check it out a couple times a month. You just reminded me to, so I went and found one thread that made me smile. I guess I'm not going to judge too hard. I can't understand actually going through the red su…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 03:04 PM
7

Every. Day.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 02:44 PM
2

I didn't date until college, guess that also makes me an ex-incel (excel?). Ew.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 02:36 AM
2

Plan B is useless if she's already ovulated. Sounds like you wanted to be a dad.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 01:49 AM
6

Sure. Last cycle my boyfriend said "It's almost big boobs season!" and I was surprised, but not weirded out, that he knew my period was about to come. What you describe is not what OP is describing. Being kind of aware that the last time she complained about period cramps was 3 weeks ago is fine. Consciously tracking is weird. Keeping a spreadsheet is incredibly weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/18 12:00 AM
6

PPD survey could have had a question about being on the spectrum.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/18 11:40 PM
9

A woman telling a regular sexual partner that her period is coming up is not the same thing as a man keeping a spreadsheet about his partner's cycle.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/18 11:39 PM
7

Yeah, if a guy is ignoring me 7 days out of every cycle we don't have a LTR...
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/18 10:30 PM
2

With the quality titles lately, we could start a weekly one.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/18 10:18 PM
1

Frustrating as a spectator, yeah. I think I'd be capable of that to be honest, if I wasn't sure she was into me. But it sounds like they were either oblivious, or aware of the other's interest but unwilling to be the one to take the next step.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/18 09:59 PM
3

More great titles.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/18 09:54 PM
3

That's funny. It's pretty much what happens whenever I start "seeing" someone, minus the unrequited interest and ghosting. We "hang out," we flirt, but until someone makes a hard move there's that uncertainty -- it could still be platonic. That period lasted more than 2 months with my ex. We weren't dating, but we were "hanging out" one-on-one. Neither of us was under the illusion that we were a couple during that time, but we were both interested and working up to it, so I can kind of see how t…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/18 09:52 PM
2

Yep. As long as a girl has a high level of attraction for you That excerpt is interesting to me. If the men watching this have women with high levels of attraction for them, they don't need to watch a video about cats.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/18 09:07 PM
1

This video is just a lot of words to say "Be more Chill". Yes. I don't disagree with that. But he takes it too far the other way in an attempt to recalibrate. If his target audience is the men you've described the exaggeration is understandable, but if they're that socially unaware they may be the type of men to take him literally. And I don't think actually "seeming the least interested in them" is an efficient sexual strategy.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/18 09:06 PM
2

Boring and not that useful. How is this cat video going to improve your life? The channel in general looks like someone trying to be RP but failing, and then he also has a video about being yourself. I'm surprised the market for that is that big, but hey, I don't get the US Kardashian hype either, so whatever. Why take the time to answer me before taking the time to add a summary to your OP?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/18 08:37 PM
2

I think he's trying to say neediness is unattractive, which is true for most people. But he takes it so far he ends up being wrong. "Girls are subconsciously drawn to the guys who seem the least interested in them"? Try never showing any girl any interest and tell me how that goes for you. I'm not sure how I'd even (sexually) notice a guy who didn't show interest in me. Also what a dramatic title, what a boring video (it did not need to be half the length it is), and what a bafflingly popular ch…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/18 07:50 PM
9

If a woman here is sexually attracted to her SO or implies he is anything but a doormat he has to be Chad.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/18 02:28 PM
3

Just hoping he doesn't get a daughter really.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/18 01:18 AM
6

I didn't ride the CC in my teens and didn't spend my time lying to my parents or hiding stuff from them, but they were cool parents. I respect them a lot and can talk to them about almost anything, including sex. They gave me free rein as long as I was a well-behaved kid and got good grades. Had they been like you describe I could easily have been more rebellious, not less. I would certainly have felt disinclined to take their advice on anything, and would have been more likely to act out just t…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/18 01:09 AM
5

How would you do that?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/18 12:30 AM
2

This is weird. I don't understand. How would a bunch of strangers know? I personally can't see that being fulfilling but some people seem to think it's fun so what do I know. If you don't want to and would "rather hang out with friends or do hobbies," then obviously no. If you do want to "spam approach," then... yes? If you're not sure, give it a try. You can just stop if you're not having fun. I imagine the "community" does not require a blood oath and for you to stay in it forever. If you're t…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/18 08:51 PM
9

Still more accurate than whatever blindfold you're wearing... what's your estimate then?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/18 05:11 PM
19

Drinking (not even underage) and pre-marital sex? "Pretty much all" people in college is accurate.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/18 04:51 PM
5

Nurturing is a better fit, yes! I mean I'd defend them from danger too, but that likely also stems from the maternal aspect.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/18 02:20 PM
6

I wasn't talking about bad boys but the sad or outright depressed type actually, as a counter to your statement that women are "repelled" by these guys. You're the one who brought bad boys into this for some reason, but you'll see none of my comments referred to them. I've never dated or wanted to "fix" a bad boy because uh... huh, I'm not sure I even know any, to be honest. Except on TV.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/18 02:01 PM
7

Nah, we get questions like OP because incels. I'm pretty consistently attracted to the kind of people that I feel might need to be "fixed." I don't think it's so much about empathy as it is that that instability combined with emotional openness makes me feel very close and useful to them. I get tender protective feelings from that, and from there romantic feelings are not a huge leap for me. (Yes, yes, reds, if they are physically attractive to me.) I don't think I am at all unique in this, espe…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/18 01:23 PM
2

I dunno but my boyfriend finds it arousing as well as just cute.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/18 10:54 AM
23

I will never understand why people here always conflate "shows emotion" or "is vulnerable" with "is depressed." Really. Is it hard to understand why a depressed person is not always a good partner choice? I have a friend who recently broke it off with his girlfriend, whom he was very infatuated with for months, when her depression became worse. He got a wandering eye, started feeling unhappy, and ended things. Guess he's AWALT. Yes, I would find severe depression -- untreated or not responding t…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/18 10:52 AM
1

I love that autocorrect.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/18 01:39 AM
1

Loneliness isn't necessarily caused by social isolation. Loneliness can be feeling like you don't have meaningful connections. I don't make friends easily, but I have a few, and I am rarely lonely. Plenty of people have a group of "friends" but still feel lonely, maybe misunderstood. Another way you can be lonely even if you talk to people is exemplified by my SO -- he has friends to talk to, people to hang out with, and goes out semi-regularly, but there is a gap between how often he would like…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/18 01:38 AM
7

I've always understood its culture through the internet I got the idea that marriage sucks FROM THIS SUB and nowhere else You'll forgive us for doubting the validity of the first quote.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/18 10:26 AM
1

Close enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/18 12:43 AM
3

I'm so sorry. My cat left us in January and it was devastating. Not sure there's much perking up possible, but sending hugs.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/18 12:43 AM
2

I don't see many reds believing that 2 is relevant. Your list seems pretty accurate. Niceness alone doesn't do much.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/18 07:43 PM
3

I'm sure many women worry about pain during their first time PIV, sometimes their first few times, some for way longer than that because of a condition like vaginismus, but that's about it and hardly contributes to making sex more "fun."
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/18 02:37 PM
4

You've never had any thoughts or concerns about a large object penetrating you and not knowing what could happen to you during it or how it will feel or anything? Literally never. Not even my first time. What outcome am I supposed to be anticipating? I didn't know what oral sex would feel like either, and it was a pleasant discovery, but there was nothing like what you describe and I don't think you describe a woman's experience with any sort of accuracy at all. lesbians don't care because only …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/18 02:28 PM
6

I don't know man, those are seriously weird thoughts to me, and I'm a woman. what could possibly happen Literally the only way this thought ever crosses my mind when related to sex with a dude is I hope I don't get pregnant. What could possibly happen?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/18 02:11 PM
5

I'm interested in hearing what's so "psychologically thrilling" and "exciting" to you about a penis.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/18 02:03 PM
8

A 29 year old expressed interest in me at 23 and I thought he was a bit old. It wasn't even his looks, just that I wanted someone in the same life stage as me. This is super common at that age. I'm 22 and my boyfriend is 3.5 years older... and that's already enough that it's been an issue. 29 would be a no-go. Even though I know some hot 29-year-olds, they are not romantic or sexual options to me. I have a 29-year-old roommate and I am pretty sure he thinks I am a kid and I think he is a cross b…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/18 11:39 PM
2

I would prefer they not have sex before 16, have sex for the first time within a relationship, use condoms every time outside of a monogamous LTR, get tested between partners, not watch porn every day, not have kids out of wedlock, and not do sex work. So if I could make a wish and have it be so (that's how I'm understanding your question), that.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/18 05:11 PM
2

Yeah of course. I said "at this point" and that it just implies they're too old to be prospects because... right now they are. I doubt I'll ever be super into balding and weight gain but I'm sure I won't care too much about hair loss and wrinkles when I'm older too.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/18 10:16 AM
2

Most noticeable would be I guess facial lines and balding. I "care" in the sense that these things signal he's too old for me. I also think both are unattractive, but that's secondary.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/18 01:13 AM
1

what are the most important physical effects of male aging Important how? The most visible? The most unattractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/18 01:08 AM
4

Important how? Hair loss and weight gain are the most unattractive to me, and I don't think I need to explain why, but they're not really anything I'd call "important." At this point any visible sign of aging just filters those people into an "older people" category that contains zero dating prospects and that I use the formal, distancing you with, just like any visible sign of being a high-schooler rules someone out as a potential dating prospect just because ew.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/18 01:05 AM
6

Females on social media are always going on about how all men are trash and there are no good men anymore. This is seen as fine I mean, who do you people have on social media? I don't think that sounds "fine" or truer than AWALT but those women and their social media posts are not a part of my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/18 07:51 PM
1

Yes. Possibly even weirder than us folks who frequent this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/18 05:49 PM
3

No, that sounds pretty bad. Did you realize it came from the weed the first time you were exposed to someone smoking it? I haven't yet discovered myself to be allergic to anything but my SO is allergic to dust (mites) and has symptoms year-round; that kind of sucks already and he'd have hated having to avoid triggers like marijuana in college.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/18 01:06 AM
2

I'm allergic to marijuana smoke, which put a major damper on my social life in college lol. No kidding! What symptoms do you get?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/18 12:56 AM
5

I'm too prim and boring for that kind of stuff I guess. I drink alcohol and coffee, but anything illegal has never tempted me in the slightest. I had a former roommate and a couple neighbors who smoked quite a bit of pot and I found their company when high intolerable. I choose not to hang out with people who are high and I would prefer to date someone who didn't touch illegal drugs, but can live with it it their consumption is occasional (and not "hard" stuff I guess). My boyfriend would love t…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/18 12:11 AM
1

No, that's already a much better basis for a discussion. Thank you.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/18 01:55 AM
7

A big part of the article is history. What do you mean by "what facts" and "what angle"? Same facts and angles as any other class I meant like a curriculum and goals to attain. Like say in 6th grade history you'd learn about the downfall of the Roman Empire and Ancient Egypt. Or the math in your junior year introduces you to integrals. Years pulled out of my ass but you get the point. It's not just "math" or "history," that's vague as shit. Like "sexology" classes. They should be taught about pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/18 01:42 AM
4

Funny, I was on that page just before I asked you what you thought should be taught. Obviously I was asking for specifics. How are we supposed to discuss whether or not it would be beneficial without knowing what facts you want to be taught and what angle they'd be approached from? What I'm getting from the Wikipedia article is that you want them to have classes about the history of sexology. Half the kids will fall asleep and the other half will just giggle through it or be on their phones.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/18 01:27 AM
4

What would these consist of? Like, seriously. What would be taught? a well-adjusted explanation on their place in society and how not to offend the sensibilities of a female overlord when trying to be sexually active Oh... that's sexology?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/18 01:00 AM
1

I don't think this would benefit men or women that much. It wouldn't hurt but it would hardly improve the world. I also don't know why you're saying all this to a woman who's said she doesn't do the "I have a boyfriend" line when it isn't true. I assume the women who do have their reasons. I won't claim to speak for them. It's also quite a leap to assume a significant amount of harassers became harassers because several women told him they had a boyfriend. (And, by the way, you don't know how ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/18 12:54 AM
2

Seems like you just circled back to my original comment. Where I said just that. You're the one saying for some reason it's better to say "I'm not interested in you" is more effective than any other no. I'm saying my experience doesn't reflect that. Edit: typo
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/18 12:33 AM
2

And I probably have a wider sample of different men's responses to "I'm not interested" than you do.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/18 12:19 AM
3

I tell them "No" and walk away. Hope extinguished. Job done. When a rando approaches me I'm not thinking about how attractive they are so I don't see why I should say something about that just because they're "hoping" for it. I have said "I'm not interested in you" and I can guarantee you most women have. The idea that those are the magic words that will make a guy leave you alone is laughable. It can work or it can fail, and it's not about how you phrase your No (provided it's a No), it's about…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/18 12:08 AM
3

I don't get this. It's not like they asked whether I'm attracted to them. They asked to see me again or they asked for my number. "No" is the direct and honest answer here. I say no to randoms, handsome or not, single or not. I've said, "I don't give my number to strangers" on occasion, which is honest (but like your example, unasked for, and he doesn't care), but so's a No, so I usually stick to that one.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 11:41 PM
1

Huh, I didn't know you were French. How did you end up here? If you insist on talking about France, are you familiar with our different régimes matrimoniaux ? A man who was that concerned about his finances in case of divorce could pick one that suited him more, probably séparation des biens or communauté réduite aux acquêts. Divorce sucks for everyone involved and it's a risk, but tbh I don't want to get married to someone who's already planning our divorce. It really is a personal thing -- I d…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 09:27 PM
4

Not according to biology.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:58 PM
12

Obviously marriage itself doesn't magically make a relationship stronger. Marriage wasn't created to make couples love each other more. It does, however, come with a host of advantages that you can find by doing a quick search on this sub. taking all the guys money then denying him the ability to see the kids Because that's exactly how divorces go.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:57 PM
3

He said, "Don't worry, I'm good with my tongue!" At least he didn't offer to join, so whatever I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:49 PM
7

Shit, sorry. That's awful.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:36 PM
7

No one "needs" to. This guy doesn't want to. Why? "Why get married?" has been discussed here many, many times; pretty much every week. Yeah, it's a personal choice. No, I don't want to be a forever girlfriend. No, I have no interest in selling anyone else on marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:35 PM
4

I dunno man, why is not getting married so important to the hypothetical guy?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:23 PM
2

My experience very accurately reflects your opinion, which is why I don't use it when I'm single. I do often use it when I actually have a boyfriend, since I figure it can't hurt... except that, as demonstrated elsewhere in the thread, you open yourself up to some gross comments from guys who take it as a challenge. But those guys would probably have been gross anyway. some need to not be responsible for disappointing the guy A sort of "It's not you, it's me" thing? I can see that.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:21 PM
6

Ouch. I can definitely picture that. Good on you for making plans to move out. I'm curious. Did you know early on he wouldn't want to marry you?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:18 PM
14

antisocial media I like it.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:08 PM
3

At this stage in my life (early twenties) I'd probably date them, but we'd crash and burn within a couple years if they didn't change their mind. So dating them in the first place would have been a bad decision, but I'm capable of those. If they absolutely wanted kids and definitely didn't want marriage, nope.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 02:00 PM
5

Exactly.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 01:55 PM
10

I don't think women don't know how to say no politely but firmly. I think the vast majority have said no. I also think many (most?) women have had an interaction where a clear (but not harsh) "No" was not initially accepted, or where that "polite exchange of good-byes" couldn't happen. I know I have. I've never been in a situation that walking away didn't eventually solve (after being followed for a block), thankfully, but I don't see why I would judge others for saying "I have a boyfriend" if i…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 01:55 PM
6

No. From my experience (truthfully) telling randoms hitting on me that I have a boyfriend, it's not all that effective. It's worked, but not often enough that I'd consider lying about it to be left alone when it doesn't work better (for me) than a No. (And of course, that one time I used the I have a girlfriend line failed pretty hard. Not sure what I was expecting with that one.) what other things have you said to a guy you didn't have any interest in? "No, thank you" or "Sorry, no" - if they s…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 01:40 PM
5

She said she was dating Bob but then she held hands with Chad.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/18 01:06 AM
3

I agree and I think a lot of women have those categories or something similar instead of a 1-10 scale. If the guy is unattractive it doesn't matter if he's a 2 or a 3; if he's attractive 8 or 9 doesn't change that. Not that we spend much time putting people we meet into those categories, but like you said they will basically make an impression right off the bat as noticeably ugly or noticeably attractive... or not make much of an impression at all, physically.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/18 10:21 PM
1

5 is the most common for me, if we're talking men in my age group. Around 30%. The 4-6 range would be around 65%. On a sort of unrelated note: I don't think attractiveness has to be a bell curve unless you force it to be (by making it a relative score and setting 5 as "average" instead of "neither attractive nor unattractive").
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/18 10:09 PM
1

Fair enough!
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 10:44 PM
6

I make my partner miserable by living far away and not eating meat. You're being very inclusive.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 07:56 PM
4

Euro right-wing nationalism is nothing new and hardly a reaction to US identity politics. I'm under the impression that alt-right is a pretty recent thing in the US. Unfortunately with the internet we do get some of your well-intentioned weird extremes (both left and right) leaking through. Thankfully the fact that French people don't speak English limits that a bit; it's even more visible in the UK. Alt-right cosplaying as european nationalism doesn't make european nationalism alt-right. Why no…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 07:47 PM
3

All right, thanks. I would have been completely off-target in my assumptions without your explanation.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 06:34 PM
2

You're right, I interpreted that differently. Do you mind telling me how it was bad for you? I'm thinking having a "it's the end of the world if this isn't for life" attitude could lead to a bunch of negative feelings, like only seeing a past relationship as a failure instead of a learning experience... or it could lead to you ignoring red flags, getting too invested too fast, or being unwilling to end something that clearly isn't working. Was there something else?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 06:14 PM
3

I won't argue with that. The American approach to race is pretty different from what's done across the pond and I have no horse in that game. The alt-right is also still a pretty American thing. I was interested in reading the article when I saw the heading but found it kind of lacking.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 06:09 PM
4

I don't think having the idea at the back of your mind is "focusing too much" on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 05:53 PM
6

I see their point about the alt-right and the college identity politics, but voting Labour or, for fuck's sake, Democrat is hardly extreme. Young people are more likely to be progressive. Age, class, and education all affect how a person leans politically and it's interesting to think about how singlehood affects it as well, but I wish the article had a bit more substance to it. I guess it's not that easy to have numbers for support of extremes when you have a two-party system though.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 05:50 PM
5

They, along with some insightful blues, make the comments I find most interesting to read. Usually things about the nature of love, how attraction works, how to maintain a relationship, and experiences I can relate to. Add to that most of the stuff Atlas says. And sometimes I just find a comment somewhat insightful, informative, or funny. I have a few saved actually, like this one and this one among the most recent, if you want an actual example of a contribution I'm glad I read. Also the recent…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 01:39 PM
6

Like I said, the sub can be a source of interesting insight. I commented to express that frustration, not engage with a red piller, but I'm willing to engage because again, I find the sub interesting and that's kind of what we do. If you comment on a thread you should expect a reply from someone who disagrees. A bit of frustration with the people who lack nuance won't ruin my day.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 12:53 PM
15

#notallreds There are a few posters here that I wouldn't lump in with the rest. They, along with some insightful blues, make the comments I find most interesting to read. But if I were to make a generalization, yes I would say people who identify as red tend to lack nuance. And I mean the overwhelming majority. I couldn't read any thread here (much less one on TRP) and not come away with that impression. I'm wondering if you do it because you genuinely doubt the ability of Red Pill users to appr…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/18 12:30 PM
1

For real.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 11:12 PM
5

Well that makes it all better then. Let me rephrase. What's the point of even being on this sub if you think anyone who doesn't fit your assumptions does fit your assumptions? It seems so weird to believe you know what complete strangers want better than they do, especially for the women whose comments here and willingness to debate have shown a degree of self-reflection -- and, yes, there are several.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 09:44 PM
2

If your definition of Chad is "someone you are very sexually attracted to," I would hope most sexually active women have slept with one. That's not the definition anyone is going by though. I guess the mods' terms and definitions will come in handy after all.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 09:21 PM
2

Does masturbation count or... 😏
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 05:15 PM
8

Q4W Women lie anyway, don't bother reading their answers! Business as usual. I disagree with you red pillers too, but I don't think you're lying when you say your personal experiences with women are negative. Is it really that hard to believe not everyone has the same experience? What's the point of even being on this sub if you think anyone who doesn't fit your assumptions is lying?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 03:46 PM
2

That's not how links work.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 02:28 PM
3

If you say so it must be true.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 01:58 PM
2

Sometimes indifferent, sometimes only mildly attracted, mostly bullshit.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 01:47 PM
9

Clearly you haven't actually spent time on AskWomen. They routinely mock people who come in asking questions about "females." I don't know a single woman who would prefer to be called a "female" so your claim that it's somehow more inclusive is super weird considering the vast majority of women actively dislike being called that.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 01:46 PM
2

It's ridiculous but at least we didn't already have it last week I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 01:42 PM
7

It's weird because most of these threads aren't actually talking about the M/W complex. And I still disagree that women are en masse settling for some guy they're sexually indifferent to. If you want to argue many lose sexual attraction to their partner over the course of the relationship when he "betas out", okay, that would be a more interesting conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 01:37 PM
3

This Sorry you missed it since I'd imagine most of the pictures are down now. I don't believe most of the women here are unattracti, but even if they were it wouldn't make your point. It doesn't take being unattractive not to have sex with Chad, it takes not being interested. I highly doubt promiscuous guys all have high standards and will only sleep with 8s and above. They (at least some of them) are willing to go lower because of the male sex drive and maybe a perception that she will be an ea…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 12:10 PM
4

The pictures thread did not reveal the women here are all ugly. And some users have seen what other users here look like and can confirm they are not low SMV. Besides, you don't need to be a 9 to find a guy willing to have sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 11:48 AM
1

Define 'Chad'. If a guy I was attracted to LTR'd me and I wasn't aware his N was super high, sure, I guess. I don't think I've met a guy I'd call a 'Chad'. do you automatically feel attraction for Chads Not all of them for sure. I've felt immediate attraction (that pull to get to know someone, or the desire for them to come over and flirt, not like let's have sex today) maybe a handful of times in my life and I'm not sure any of them would fit the description of "Chad." One's probably like 5'3",…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 08:41 AM
1

You tell me, you're the one who brought them up.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 07:44 AM
1

Asking if their table is dark will get more "yeses" from people than asking if it is dark green, what's your point?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 07:07 AM
1

Why am I "strange"? It is normal for people to have hobbies. Lots of people think shared hobbies are important but looking at past threads even here you will find many who don't share that view. But sure, by all means, consider me "different" if it makes more sense to you. I think you are strange too.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 07:02 AM
1

What you call "he time", his preferences, and his own "active" behavior to a dream or leisure, can and normally are seen as wasted time and effort and most women I know will decrease their view of him if he has any of these. People have hobbies. Most women I know find a lack of hobbies or interests unattractive or just plain uninteresting. Leisure time is normal. I presume it may be desirable to women because of women do not like the alternative. Women do not like the complete opposite, I've alr…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 01:33 AM
1

No worries, the formula is only valid until you hit The Wall!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 01:01 AM
2

I've been meaning to work on my Portuguese. I already said I wasn't criticizing your use of the word passive. I was just curious as to why you thought it was a desirable trait, and I disagree that it is. And I explained why above. men who do NOT do what "they want without taking their partner into consideration" Just normal, balanced people really. It's like saying, "what do you call people who do NOT commit crimes?" I don't call them non-criminals, I just call them people. Maybe "cooperative," …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 12:58 AM
3

There is a lot between "does as he pleases" and "does as I say." No, I don't want my SO to do whatever he wants without taking him into consideration; no, women don't find "passiveness" desirable either. Most of the traits you listed are somewhat positive and something people filter for; this one isn't. I guess it could help create a sense of comfort and security, and in that sense it is a beta trait -- but IMO not one of the ones women filter for in a relationship. Filtering against men who do …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 12:40 AM
2

Unclear -- do you assume this about every woman or about the ones you perceive as slutty?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 12:35 AM
1

I automatically applied the math to my age in my head. I should spend less time on PPD and go back to my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 12:33 AM
1

Apt username.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 12:25 AM
1

Passive can work for that. Or obedient, or submissive, or a doormat. I'm not saying you used the word wrong. I was just curious as to what your reasoning was because I do not think women see "passiveness" as a positive trait in a long-term partner (or a short term one, to be honest). And it takes a specific type of woman to want a partner who "stays put and does as she says." Jesus.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 12:23 AM
2

I dunno, I don't see what's attractive about "passiveness" in a LTR.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/18 12:18 AM
2

Why is "passiveness" in there?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 11:59 PM
3

Possibly because you are saying different things, not just "phrasing it differently." The second one does not mention romantic partners at all. Or sexual desire.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 11:04 PM
3

In your opinion, clearly.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 10:48 PM
2

It's not "dehumanizing" to not be sexually attracted to someone. Or to want sex with someone but not want a relationship with them. In a relationship it sucks, sure. But it's not dehumanization.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 10:43 PM
2

dehumanize them into being either worthy of love or desirable for sex Seriously? This is what we're calling dehumanization now?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 10:33 PM
7

However, the more she's done this with others the less lilely it's because she's doing it from arousal It's not like your ability to get aroused diminishes with each sexual partner. So, when a man wants a woman who will do with him things she wouldn't do with anyone else The fuck does this have to do with Madonna/Whore. You understand he can't see the Madonna in a sexual way right? Good luck making babies.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 09:12 PM
2

I've never owned horses and don't plan to -- how lovely to event with your own horse! But yes I'm a coward and get scared on that terrain too. Poor horses probably feel it too.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 07:37 PM
3

Your average English riding classes with a mix of flatwork, jumping, and cross-country. Nothing actually goes inside when I ride so I don't attribute the discreetness of my hymen to that. I'd get chafing sometimes and that would bleed though, but it was all external. Looking at images like this it's not hard to see how one could get no bleeding or tearing in the case of a "normal" hymen.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 07:09 PM
1

Meh. I mean I ride too but I don't think that's how I "broke" mine, I think mine was just elastic enough that I never noticed (felt) it stretching. Hymens don't completely cover the entrance to the vagina anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 06:54 PM
0

Yup, hymens are overrated. I was still a virgin when I learned they existed but I never noticed mine so shrug.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 05:26 PM
2

I gave my boyfriend terrible blowjobs when I started and it took ages (in his opinion) for us to have PIV and I'm never going to be "sexually adventurous." But I'm not dating a guy who expects me to be a porn star so whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 04:47 PM
10

Yeah, I never thought about mine and certainly didn't feel it stretch or break or ever saw any blood that wasn't my period.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/18 04:37 PM
2

More attractive women get more attention? Say it ain't so.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 11:08 PM
1

I meant I wouldn't be surprised if some are actually men, yeah. I know a RP woman would not want to marry some dude off TRP. Obviously. What I meant is there is regular advice that pushes the male imperative more than the female one, particularly when it comes to having sex (early, of course) or expecting exclusivity (don't ask for it or expect it), or going for much older permanent bachelors (much stability and money). Or just sad threads where the woman is clearly with someone who doesn't give…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 10:42 PM
1

I'm sure I could learn to be more giving and yielding and less of a bitch without hating everything about the process, but I can not relate to the "women" over at redpillwomen. And don't even get me started on loneliness-inc. It just isn't a women's sub dedicated to helping women improve their relationships. It's way more efficient at serving the (RP) male imperative. I gave the sub a try, but no thanks. Redpillwives is less shitty but utterly boring and I'm not married so it's not really for me…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 10:24 PM
1

Noted, thanks. I've spent some time on the redpillwomen and redpillwives subs -- even posted there from an alt --, but no, the mindset isn't for me. Particularly redpillwomen.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 09:58 PM
1

Neither to be honest(and especially not the first), just blathering about my life. It was on my mind and I didn't want to tell people who know him about it, so reddit it was. If you have advice regarding how to support him I'll gladly take it though.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 09:47 PM
1

Much angst basically. He'll go though.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 09:39 PM
1

Me too. Roommate just got appropriately pissed at Ramos for that dirty move...
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 07:13 PM
2

This was last week's topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 06:46 PM
2

Who are you rooting for?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 06:46 PM
2

No personal experience with it. If some guy told me "I think you’re the girl of my dreams" when we barely knew each other, um, red flag, please feel free to ghost me like yesterday. I don't think ghosting is great but it gets the point across and if it's done early I guess you don't owe them any explanation. It's absolutely horrible and painful if you're in a relationship and get ghosted as a way of breaking up but that's not usually what people mean. I do not think mosting is a trend and I sinc…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 06:44 PM
2

I just walked into the living room to find my roommate with the TV on, all ready for the final. Right now that means I'm watching girls in pink dancing for some reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 06:38 PM
1

The word sounds terrible. Really.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 06:36 PM
1

Why is there someone checking receipts in the first place?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 11:05 AM
1

I have to say you're a pretty pleasant person to disagree with.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 12:28 AM
2

Weird post. If someone only wants a ONS they're not going to care whether you are willing to mention it to your friends or not. (Probably better if you don't, really.) If they don't only want sex then it's going to matter. Women don't see sex as "validating" because men, collectively, are horny enough to have sex with anything. It's not validating if Mr. Horny just wants to bang and would just as soon bang my roommate, my neighbor, my teacher, my mom, and the porn star he jacked off to three tim…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 12:22 AM
1

Yes, friendship and romantic love are different. ETA: Ah, you edited. Not convinced women initiate most non-marital breakups. Also do not think initiating a break-up has much to do with conditionality of love. Plenty of people stay because they are scared they can't do better, or because they're comfortable, because their needs are getting met but they're not actually doing anything for their partner, or because a divorce is a hassle -- not just because their love is somehow less conditional. Me…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/18 12:07 AM
2

I can imagine! Gorgeous country. And the people are fun and I love the language.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 11:06 PM
2

Nah, just in Argentina at the moment. Only 3 more months. :(
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 10:50 PM
2

Had no idea that was this weekend. Happy Memorial Day Weekend I guess. Why is this a happy thing? Meanwhile here we had Friday off to celebrate the May Revolution.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 10:24 PM
1

edgy college kid wisdom. Not actually alpha then. Definitely sounds like reddit TRP flavor of alpha though.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 08:23 PM
1

So like... Actually Tyler Durden?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 06:54 PM
1

*Waggener. Googling Paul Waggoner gave me someone apparently unrelated to Operation Werewolf.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 06:53 PM
1

there's a popular Manosphere blogger who is early-2000s-edgy enough to use that name That's actually quite hilarious, thanks for the info. And, yep, I agree. I still think he's pretty alpha; I don't think all alpha traits are positive. He was the first thing that came to mind when I saw the title.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 06:47 PM
1

Mm, I'd delivery and attitude matters too. I've been called beautiful by a stranger I didn't find attractive -- I barely remember what he looked like, but he was too old for me to find attractive anyway --, and I was really flattered, and not at all creeped out. But he wasn't hitting on me, just giving me that one compliment. He complimented me as he walked by, and didn't turn around or say another word. Random people hitting on me make me uncomfortable regardless of how hot they are; compliment…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 06:44 PM
1

Of Fight Club fame, yes. I'm not aware of any other Tyler Durden.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 06:35 PM
4

Tyler Durden?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 06:07 PM
3

I don't. I wasn't addressing women's dating struggles or The Wall, just how people's social lives change in general... IMO. I haven't lived through it yet so it's mostly speculation and observation. My boyfriend has struggled to make friends after graduation despite being a very social, extroverted person. He's not a part of the everyone here is a freshman ready to meet people and get drunk thing anymore. Or the I share classes with hundreds of people and will probably make friends with at least…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 03:52 PM
6

It's so easy to meet people your age and with similar interests in college. It's so easy to find a social event to go to in college. I've seen a lot of people on reddit asking how people make friends after college. I'm not surprised that extends to dating and it's probably a big factor contributing to the popularity of online dating -- that people don't seem to know how to, or find the time to, meet people in other ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 03:38 PM
2

Charming. "Safer" because they assume you'll be discreet and not expect more from them than some sex on the side?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 03:19 PM
1

IME men in my social circle know and respect the fact that I am in a relationship, and if not it's easy to remind them of that fact and enforce boundaries or just drop the disrespectful ones. I wouldn't want the disrespectful ones as friends even if I were married, but I imagine that would deter some of them. I'm just not convinced random people hitting on you think about whether you're married or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 03:18 PM
1

I thought that might be what you were saying. No argument here then.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 03:10 PM
1

I want marriage so that other men will stop hitting on me Does that work? I don't think all guys check for a ring before approaching. And then you have guys like my boyfriend. He doesn't even know what finger the ring goes on and wondered if the nineteen-year-old he had just me was married, because I wear a ring... on the middle finger of my right hand.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 03:08 PM
3

I mostly agree with what you're saying, in that her attraction to the guy is very important, and if the sex is exactly the same in both situations the one she is more sexually attracted to makes for better, more enjoyable sex, but: The woman's mental state dictates how much she will enjoy the sex, it doesn't matter how the actual act goes down, like your post implies, what matters is how she feels about the guy she is having sex with Both matter. Generally, if she is not attracted to him but he …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 02:58 PM
5

Some really weird ideas on this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 02:31 PM
2

I was asking what "men love with fewer strings attached" meant; I think you answered with your view of women's love?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 12:27 PM
5

I've loved and been loved by a man and a woman and I find the notion that one gender is less capable of "genuine love" baffling and myopic. I also personally find it hard to believe there is such a thing as misaligned romantic and sexual attractions (like being only emotionally attracted to one gender but only sexually attracted to the other), but I will get my SJW card taken away if I say that too loudly.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 10:41 AM
3

What does love with few strings attached even mean? NSA sex, okay; NSA love?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 10:38 AM
2

I hadn't seen shit tests described that way before. It doesn't seem like that's how it's usually understood? Or at least they're not only that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 10:34 AM
3

I mean... its seems to me it's obviously an individual thing. Most people I know are not like that. The ones I know who are like that are guys, but most guys aren't like that. I find that view kind of baffling.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 10:18 AM
1

I can see that, I suppose. Since I mostly get to know people as friends first I don't differentiate that from the initial "testing" friends put each other through to see if our senses of humor are compatible and if they can take some teasing or whatever. I'm sure I test for social competency, yeah. Although tbh my second boyfriend would have scored quite low on that front.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/18 12:36 AM
2

I've already read about what shit tests are supposed to be, but thank you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 11:37 PM
1

The lady at the bakery here gives me a few dozen cents' worth of free stuff almost every time. I would say it's my natural charm but I come off as cold and distant so probably not. Maybe the accent. I also owe my roommate a ton of wine and beer but he's recovering from surgery and can't drink so in the meantime I am making up for it by tying his shoelaces.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 10:41 PM
7

As a Frenchwoman the analogy is bullshit and we do learn that avait is imparfait and a eu is passé composé. We were taught tenses and modes in French class. Of course you learn your native language differently than a foreign one but focusing on tenses like that was a bad choice. My problem with shit testing is I don't understand what it refers to. Most examples just sound like teasing to me, and the reaction TRP encourages is to tease right back, which is just... a normal interaction? Other exam…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 09:32 PM
5

No. I do believe there are guys who are so unnattractive (and not just physically) that they really really struggle to "get" a relationship or casual sex. I do not think those guys are average.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 04:43 PM
2

Because the downsides of marrying a red flag the size of China can be quite a bit worse than the downsides of getting married a few years after your family/community start whispering about what's wrong with you that it's taking you so long.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 03:20 PM
3

Yes, I realize you're not looking to date like what is usually discussed here. But you're 24. You shouldn't worry about "taking too long" to the extent that you'll literally accept a red flag the size of China.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 03:15 PM
2

What's your hurry? You're not old. Why would you want or expect to find your life partner online within a few days?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 03:04 PM
2

I went to 4 elementary schools in 3 different countries, then I moved just before I started middle school and again just before I started high school. By the end of middle school, and then high school, I was itching to change cities. 3 years in one place started to feel like forever. That happened again in college. When you're out of school making new friends in a new country can be a challenge. I know it hasn't been easy for my boyfriend, and he's a pretty social person. So I can understand tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 01:32 PM
1

I've always been very shy and I'm grateful for the moving around experience actually. As a kid, the first couple moves were hard. Then I got used to it. Then I started looking forward to it and having a hard time "standing still" in one location. I'm sure I'd be very different too if I hadn't had those opportunities -- I probably wouldn't speak English, for one thing. No PPD for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 01:18 PM
6

And yet it was explained to you at length in your thread why the women here don't feel inclined to trash their SOs on the sub. Hint: it has nothing to do with "deeply painful" experiences or things being too personal to talk about.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 01:00 PM
4

I was "bullied," to different degrees, in my last six months of elementary school, and in my first year of high school and first year of middle school -- basically whenever I was the new kid. Never violently, nothing really bad, but as a kid it sucked. My family moved around a lot, I was shy, and I spoke a foreign language, so I wasn't a difficult target. In elementary school it was girls and guys, but mostly one guy, who was my age but taller and heavier. I would sit in a corner of the recess a…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/18 12:40 PM
7

Definitely the ugly one. He had me at cat torture.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 11:14 PM
2

Gladly, but... how does this support OP's view?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 10:37 PM
4

Pretty sure it was a joint decision in my parents' marriage. My mother worked while my father got his degree, and hasn't since then. He has worked in like 8 cities in 4 different countries since my brother was born, and we've never stayed in the same city for more than 5 years. It's not easy to keep a career going when you're moving every few years for the other partner's career. I'm not sure she was even allowed to work, legally, when we lived in the US. If we're just talking a job, any job? Su…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 09:31 PM
1

Jobless student and torn between being sick of classes and not actually looking forward to working full-time.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 08:22 PM
3

I don't bother with the feminism ones, so that would make sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 06:43 PM
5

The same themes/threads come up on PPD all the time and we rehash them to death for about a week, then move on to the next. This week seems very "slut" and "N" oriented.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 05:35 PM
7

I told my boyfriend when he started talking about kids that I would not have them outside of marriage. When I mentioned this conversation to my mom, she smiled and said she told my father the same thing. And... she did not have kids out of wedlock. Plenty of women do. Plenty don't, and would not.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 03:48 PM
5

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 03:43 PM
3

The popular guys dated the popular girls. Lots of people didn't date. Lots of people had crushes, but were too scared to do anything about them. In high school there were more people dating, but the vast majority of people weren't really putting serious effort or thought into it. They got a girlfriend who was usually in their friend circle and kissed and held hands for a few weeks and then some texting drama occurred and they broke up with lots of tears. Some had sex, some didn't. Didn't really …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/18 01:47 AM
1

By that definition I am super whipped.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 11:02 PM
8

There's software for that xD
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 09:42 PM
2

In retrospect my first two boyfriends were practice boyfriends. I was young and curious. But they didn't last anywhere near 8 years, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 07:57 PM
7

To define the terms I mean penis in vagina. One. I personally count mine as 3, but if that's the definition we're using, 1. I have deliberately implied my N was higher to seem "cool" to a group. When I told my boyfriend he was like "Oh, shit, really?" because he was a part of that group and saw me playing Never Have I Ever. Told him before we slept together though (he didn't ask), as I told my past SOs. Female, early twenties.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 06:18 PM
6

I've never met a guy I would qualify as whipped, but if you always do whatever she wants/asks even when it means sacrificing your own wants and needs I'd say you're pretty whipped. If you find your needs are being met and are happy in a relationship, I wouldn't worry too much about jokes that you're whipped; if you're having doubts ask them why they're telling you that. Some signs: you run absolutely everything past her for her approval (especially if you're not married or living together). You …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 03:34 PM
4

I thought the same. They say "sex can trigger powerful feelings of love" and "sex can push you over the edge of falling in love," and somewhere that can became "sex is never casual." I think people often have sex with, like you said, people they don't care that much about -- and still don't care afterwards.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 03:12 PM
9

I am beginning to understand why so many people were against allowing advice threads here.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 03:08 PM
0

Actually, it isn't always...
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 02:50 PM
3

causal
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 02:38 PM
1

Mainstream media
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 11:55 AM
2

My boyfriend got called in for an interview for a job he really wants and that would be great for us, distance-wise. He'd been talking about it for weeks, fingers crossed. Unfortunately it looks like time and date are non-negotiable and the interview is in another city on the day of an important meeting at his current job, so instead of celebrating the news he is stressed and unsure as hell.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 11:40 AM
2

I always read MSM as men who have sex with men so this one took a while to make sense to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/18 12:40 AM
9

For real. How unrelatable is this? Then again, it reads like most of the laughable field reports over at TRP.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 11:25 PM
2

I can understand being insecure about a low N. Mostly though in this hypothetical he would win points simply by being on my radar again, because if I previously thought he had an "incredibly high" N he wouldn't have been. Can't get lower than that so the only way is up. An outright lie would be pretty bad but I would probably still understand it. I've hinted at a higher N than I actually have to be "cool" so I shouldn't judge. 5 - no, I don't feel like he cheated, that's silly. "Incredibly" high…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 09:01 PM
2

I guess I would rather evasiveness or "I don't want to tell you" than a lie. But I see your point.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 08:42 PM
2

Let me just add a VI for "immediate dealbreaker." When I'm getting to know someone I am nowhere near invested enough to still be interested after finding out about a big turn-off. 1 - VI 2 - VI 3 - VI 4 - VI if it's random, I if it's like in a conversation about past relationships 5 - VI 6 - IV, clearly I think he can get around but chooses not to, attractive 7,8 - VI if high N, I if low N 9 - IV 10 - VI
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 08:38 PM
3

I don't appreciate being lied to even over things I don't care about. It's obviously a bigger deal if I do care about it but feeling the need to lie about small stuff isn't exactly a positive.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 08:34 PM
1

Thanks! I almost answered but then got stuck on the first question so...
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 08:30 PM
2

Can you explain your use of the verb solicit?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 07:52 PM
10

I mean, you're not really disproving my point. She sounds weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 07:49 PM
10

I knew the N of all my past partners (and they knew mine), and even I don't put this much thought into it... No guy has ever announced his N when getting to know me lol, and they didn't later reveal they'd been lying or posturing. That's just weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 06:55 PM
2

Has the world solicit changed meanings since I learned English?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 06:42 PM
4

The graph above shows that while there’s some reason to think a growing share of never-married young men is going sexless based on GSS data, it could be that the sexless share among these young men is about stable, as the NHANES shows, or even falling, as the NSFG shows. Helpful.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/18 11:43 AM
2

How "abrasive" are we talking here? Because if I have to have him in the house for 18 years I'd rather he be respectful to us at least. If he was awful I'd look at him and constantly wonder where we went wrong. successful life The hot guy, all else being equal.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/18 10:31 PM
3

Yeah, that happens a lot. I find it entertaining though.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/18 10:30 PM
3

I don't believe we have many members who would argue looks don't matter at all...
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/18 09:48 PM
4

... I don't think their looks are mismatched.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/18 07:21 PM
1

How the heck is that getting to the root of the problem... Only in the US.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/18 12:47 AM
5

It's going to be a crowded corner. After all, all the PPD women are outliers.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/18 08:57 PM
7

I personally leave my relationships "flaws" within my own relationship. If i cant handle a flaw well enough that I cant communicate it with my partner then.. i should not be in a relationship Pretty much yeah! If I want to work things out with my SO then painting a bad image of him to my friends or family isn't going to help -- the last thing I want is for my parents to think my chosen partner is an asshole just because there's one small thing that irritates me and I made the big mistake of brin…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 07:00 PM
29

This thread is ridiculous and you know it. The quote doesn't say her guy is flawless. She's talking about traits she likes that he has, and the points she brings up are presumably relevant to the discussion. Nowhere does she say "He has no flaws." Often in discussions here, it's more relevant to talk about what we like about our SOs. My SO has flaws. I've mentioned here before that he's needy, easily frustrated (and he is unpleasant and irritable when frustrated), and pretty negative (a pessimis…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 01:53 PM
2

For random harassment and catcalling, all sorts really. But the guys who've fallen for me or pursued me for a relationship have all been very decent. What they had in common ever since middle school was being the kind of guy I'd like to have as a friend -- given that I did start by friending most of them. (Yeah, yeah, poor friendzoned guys.) A couple were somewhat socially awkward, others had anxiety or issues with depession, some were as well-adjusted as you'd expect. I've noticed I tend to mak…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 02:15 AM
3

No idea what you're talking about now or how it relates to what you just quoted. maybe men crave "different," not just "better" Sure. So what? Does that make them less of an infidelity red flag?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/18 12:06 AM
3

Ah, you're right. The (1) and (2) should have tipped me off but the lack of bold and italics and capitalizing made me forget to check the username.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 11:58 PM
3

How could that not be an aspect of the fantasy? I don't typically imagine myself in the place of the characters when I read erotica. Like, I don't imagine myself as one character and my boyfriend as the other. It's more like voyeurism. Watching two people getting it on in a way that turns me on. I regularly get off to M/M erotica between wizards, but if I'm perfectly happy being a woman and if I were given the chance to be reborn as a dude I wouldn't take it. The M/M stuff I read frequently invo…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 11:57 PM
4

If someone actively wants to cheat that's a red flag, duh. If the only thing they could get off to was cheating fantasies it would be pretty damn concerning. If they explicitly got off to the idea of betraying their partner, ew. But I mean... how are you going to know? Some people would never cheat. Some would actively try to. Some would "if the circumstances aligned." I doubt that many (male or female) actually get off on the betrayal itself. I imagine that women have this fantasy of forbidden …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 11:44 PM
2

Prefer trimmed, especially if you have a lot going on down there. Bare is okay (not my preference, but whatever) if you can commit to keeping up with it; stubble down there sucks. However it's not something I feel too strongly about and I've never been with anyone where too much hair was an issue. It's not something I tell anyone other than my SO (who ignores my preference anyway) because uh... who else am I supposed to "speak up" about this to?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 09:59 PM
1

Oh, I see. That's different. I don't think there's ever been any celeb like that for me. I don't pay attention to them outside of whatever movie I'm watching so I'm not familiar enough with any of them to want to be more like them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 09:26 PM
2

I don't idolize her, but Emma Watson is the only celebrity crush I've ever had. It's weakened since the HP franchise ended and I've only seen one of the other movies she's been in, but she's still the only celebrity I can say I had a "celeb crush" on. With most other celebrities I barely know their name and have trouble recognizing them from one film to the next. She is the furthest thing from my physical type, but she played Hermione and that was enough to win over teenage me.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 09:18 PM
2

I think lots of people do, but it can definitely go out the window when they are in that relationship and actually having to deal with the person they love changing.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 03:00 PM
2

I've been the friend in that situation (not in that they ended up dating me, just the giving advice thing) and, yeah, they ended up breaking up but tbh the things for which they were coming to me for advice were huge signs that they wouldn't last long. If there are big problems in a relationship and someone is going to a friend about it, the problem isn't the friend.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/18 10:16 AM
3

I think I was pretty clear about what I meant. If it amuses you to interpret my words that way, by all means, go ahead.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 11:35 PM
2

Look for whatever you want. I think my SO and I have great sex, certainly the best he's had, and in general I have more than 0 self-confidence. But I stand by what I said -- if a guy is not interested in anything other than sex he'd probably be better off giving his time to someone who will have sex earlier.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 11:19 PM
3

No experience that I'm aware of. In the past I've made "getting sex" take a while and I don't date strangers so I guess most guys who only wanted sex just wouldn't have stuck around? If you're only looking for sex, sex with me is hardly that special. I don't trust people very easily in general, with my emotions or with sex. But that's not because of bad experiences, just how I am.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 10:14 PM
17

False. The belief that men can't be unhappy in a relationship isn't a BP one by any stretch of the imagination. Blue pill posters on PPD recognize that unhappy relationships exist. I'm sure the posters over at TBP do too. And if by "blue pill" you mean "mainstream," it's still not true. I mean, who thinks men are always happy in their relationships?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 12:11 PM
4

You could do better by giving examples.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 12:06 PM
0

How would you get the demand to go down?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 09:51 AM
6

I'm bi and I am often (but far from exclusively) attracted to people who express traits usually attributed to the other gender. My ex was a lesbian who'd always struggled with her gender identity, and my huge crush in high school was a quiet, bookish, gentle guy who later came out to me as gay (I was absolutely crushed). I guess my answer depends on what you're calling feminine traits. Cries watching Titanic? Attractive. Wears pink? Yup. Quiet, sensitive, nurturing? I'm into that. Posts a selfie…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 09:47 AM
1

I'm 5'5"
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 07:13 AM
2

In the sexual market place, women barter in Bitcoin while Men barter in Venezuelan Bolívar. I really like this sentence and it gets your point across pretty vividly, ha.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 01:05 AM
2

INB4 women have unreasonable standards and are only attracted to the top 10% of men!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 01:00 AM
3

Pretty much a younger, more tanned version of this. Long dark hair, non-white skin, dark eyes, lean and strong, smiling, and minimal facial hair (and not much body hair either I guess) pretty much define my "type." Bonus points for wearing that shirt or this one. If I have to pick a height let's say 5'9; I've found it's a nice height for cuddles and hugs without being too tall.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 12:59 AM
3

Thank you for taking the time to write that, I appreciate it! It's clearer to me now.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/18 12:27 AM
1

You get flaired CMV if your title is an affirmative claim; it's not like the mods refuse to let OPs have any opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 11:51 PM
2

Can you give an example of this kind of "betaing out"? Makes sense to me but I'm not really visualizing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 11:43 PM
2

I guess whoever has more options technically sacrifices "more," but I wouldn't really call it a sacrifice to let go of stuff you don't want to obtain something you do want. I put a lot of time and money into my relationship but I don't consider even that to be a sacrifice. So guys who would want to sleep with me, yeah that's not a sacrifice at all. I think when you choose someone the relationship itself shouldn't feel like a sacrifice for either partner... at worst, maybe a compromise. Again, gi…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 11:40 PM
1

And I don't care about what helps you. I'm just telling you how it works. No, a woman who has you in her "meh" category does not want to fuck you. But she may want to -- and yes, I mean sexual desire and -- after more interaction.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 08:34 PM
1

Yeah, you've said that before. I'm sure many women would disagree.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 08:24 PM
2

But the guys in the "meh" category are neither attractive nor attractive (based on a picture), they're just... there. Not, "Oh wow, nice," but not outright unattractive. I wouldn't rate 80% of the guys I know as attractive, but I wouldn't call them repulsive either.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 08:16 PM
2

I'm also European and also said in my answer that the vast majority of age-appropriate people I meet fall into that "meh, who knows" category. It's just not that common to be "hell no, never" levels of physically repulsive. I find it hard to believe if I suddenly ended up in the US 80% of guys my age would be hopelessly unattractive... a bigger percentage than in France sure due to overweight people (though we also have our fair share), but 80% seems hard to believe. What makes all these guys so…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 08:10 PM
2

What do you mean by physically attracted? Thinking he is good-looking? Or actually experiencing attraction? I took it to mean sexual attraction rather than just judging whether a guy is physically cute because otherwise this question from the OP doesn't make sense: How common is for a guy to generate with time physical attraction in a woman by virtue of his personality, character, mind etc.? Or do you need status and money?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 06:31 PM
3

Why don't you just read through past posts in this sub? Or read up on the red pill. That's kind of a prerequisite for good discussion here...
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 06:05 PM
3

I would say it is pretty common for women to end up being sexually attracted to someone who didn't really register as particularly hot the first time they laid eyes on them. "At first glance" rarely gives a woman all the info she needs to be sexually attracted; "first glance" doesn't tell her much about attitude, confidence, how the guy acts, body language, his voice, if he's able to escalate... Obviously yes "first glance" is enough to say "He's ugly" or "He's cute," but there's a whole range i…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 03:40 PM
1

How so? They're different (and different parts of my body end up aching if it goes on for a while), but I've not found one to be more "work." However I could believe women give oral more often than men do if we really want to start a conversation about the fairness thing lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 01:00 AM
1

The question is flawed. I can give you a percentage but it doesn't account for the way my sexuality works so isn't very meaningful. It could change without my friends list changing at all; if I end up having deeper conversations and more flirtatious interactions with some guy I'm not completely unattracted to and realize he's cooler than I thought and we have chemistry, he could probably move into the "yes" category. And the guys in the "yes" category did not start out there. I still went throug…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/18 12:49 AM
6

Okay. I think people should care about their own pleasure and their partner's. If I only wanted to care about mine I'd just masturbate.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 10:43 PM
2

To be fair I'd be pretty insulted if a man called me that and I'm not post-menopause. I imagine a post-menopause woman would feel similar, and worse if she was self-conscious about vaginal dryness or her age.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 07:02 PM
6

You won't be surprised to learn reddit has already discussed this.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 06:51 PM
8

Exactly what GridReXX said as a top level comment. If I have sex 1000x with my boyfriend, I have a N of one. If I have sex 1x with 30 guys, I have a N of 30. Now think about it...
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 06:45 PM
4

That feeling of tightness or elasticity changes with arousal (obviously it tightens back up) with childbirth (again it mostly snaps back, but less so for older women or after multiple births) with age (the hormonal changes that come with menopause reduce elasticity which can lead to a "tighter" feeling; more generally I think age reduces elasticity to but not, like, drastically) Is it a significant factor in SMV? I imagine if the dude can't feel anything he won't bang her again, but I think that…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 06:45 PM
11

some say that it's a sexist myth that it declines with N-count. I mean, you just have to think about it for 2 seconds.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 06:33 PM
7

You can look up and see that's not what I wrote. I already disagreed with you about foreplay in the other thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 05:25 PM
5

Yeah, that was my first thought. I do it to my boyfriend because it's fun for me but I think he'd be fine never feeling a kiss on his thigh again. He gets ticklish (the squirming is delightful) and wants me to get straight to "the good stuff," so thigh kissing is usually very brief... no idea how most men feel about it but it wouldn't surprise me if they were similar.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 04:52 PM
7

To be fair that would also be a problem
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 04:43 PM
21

Q4Men: How often does the girl penetrate you versus you penetrating her? Q4ALL: Is the sex you have exactly 50/50 in terms of energy spent, acts performed, orgasms received, and pleasure had? If so you're lying, if not how do you deal with the horrible unfairness of it all?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 04:41 PM
4

How are you getting "men being slandered" from women talking about how much they enjoy foreplay?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 04:38 PM
3

You can do that if you want.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 04:11 PM
3

Lesbian bed death is probably related to women's reactive and on average lower sex drive. It's not about "oh no I don't want to kiss you all over, too much effort." When they do have sex women give women orgasms much more reliably than men give women orgasms.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 04:10 PM
3

I just disagree, as that is not my experience as a woman. As for the latter part of your comment, if they want to receive foreplay then they can express that or sleep with someone who will willingly give it to them. Again, it's not been my experience that women just lay back and don't reciprocate. I don't do that with my male partner, and my female ex didn't do that either.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 04:07 PM
6

Thanks. I can't imagine enjoying, wanting, or even having sex that didn't have that stuff going on, but to each their own.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 03:50 PM
3

What do you count as foreplay?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 03:40 PM
5

Noticeably more, because when two women are having sex no one's thinking about what feels good for a guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 03:35 PM
8

Extremely important, and it's not just "in my opinion." It's pretty important for most women's sexual pleasure. No foreplay with someone who is a regular sexual partner can work sometimes (our past sexy interactions build up and can, once in a while, replace foreplay), but most of the time I'd rather not have sex at all if we're skipping the foreplay because in most cases it's just going to be painful or boring. I would rather make out and do a lot of foreplay than have PIV intercourse with no f…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 03:32 PM
1

Thank you. That's the plan when I graduate. I agree if we can never close the distance it will have to end, but we're hopeful.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 02:59 PM
1

Long distance.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 02:50 PM
1

I mean that spontaneous human behaviors have inclinations towards suppressed impulses. Not only that, they short circuit after a period of time. Can you explain what this has to do with formal dating vs meeting people through social circles? And does creating a honeymoon period inevitably lead to some kind of fall to earth? There is still a honeymoon period with "first date, second date". continuously be moving between false or misleading representations of a person? That’s kind of what love hap…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 12:48 AM
1

I'm not sure what you mean. Only dating people you meet organically doesn't stop you from making good decisions. Due to pre-vetting, I'd say you're a bit less likely to end up with a psycho or complete asshole who fakes well in the early stages. What I'll admit it does do is limit your dating pool, compared to say online dating. But I'm not sure having many options to choose from "on paper" means you automatically pick a better one. do they just seem like better choices Better than what?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 12:22 AM
3

Not who you're asking, but I think it's definitely the best way for me. I can't really compare since I've never gotten a bf/gf from the "first date, second date, third date, DTR" template, but getting to know someone "organically" lets my attraction to them build up with none of the weird "rules" like "sex on the third date" or whatever. You get to build sizzling sexual tension, that sweet initial Are they interested or aren't they?, that moment when you realize Fuck yes they're interested, and …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 10:30 PM
3

We don't sound that awful.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 10:17 PM
2

When I don't text my boyfriend for a while he texts me, "You are dead." If that message stays unread for a few more hours he hits Google to make sure no French people have just been murdered where I am.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 10:16 PM
3

I doubt he would have paid you any heed. She got pregnant at 17 and it seems likely they were both just stupid about it. They played house for like 5 years, which was about 5 years longer than I expected it to last.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 10:07 PM
4

A month ago my oldest friend split from the father of her toddler (they weren't married). About 2 weeks later she officially had a new boyfriend and now they post about how much they love each other on Facebook. I guess that explains why she wasn't torn up about the breakup. Also icky Facebook relationships. I think she's the only friend I have who posts about her relationship in that way; I don't really get it.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 09:02 PM
9

I'm stubborn, I can be passive-aggressive, I hold on to grudges, and I'm a pretty private person so it's hard to get me to open up. My boyfriend has expressed frustration over all of these but my biggest flaw according to him would probably be my willingness to go on exchange 12 000 km away from him. I'm also an introvert and need time to myself to recharge, so don't do well with clingy or needy types.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 07:18 PM
8

It's not true for me. When I'm in a monogamous relationship I don't put myself in situations where sexual attraction to someone else could build. But if I allow those situations to happen (getting close with a guy who is attracted to me, flirting heavily, etc), then I can develop sexual attraction to someone else despite being in love. And I can certainly think a guy is hot even if I'm happily in love. Idolozing, though, sounds weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 03:40 PM
3

Congratulations.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/18 10:24 AM
10

Yeah, this is pretty much how it works in my social circles too. I meet someone, through friends or at a party or in class or something, we hit it off, we keep seeing each other in social situations and interacting and flirting, then the other person makes a hard move and whee, a relationship appears.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 10:51 PM
5

I would ask the opposite question haha. Why post if I haven't graduated college and have only had a handful of short relationships or no experience at all? -- Ah, because it entertains me and because even some of the oldies with more experience can be wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 10:17 PM
6

My father would catch the spider, then wave it under the nose or pretend to release it down the back of the most arachnophobic person in the room. I am now brave enough to face the things head on, because I am more scared of my father with a spider than of the spider itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 09:26 PM
2

Atlas would say Anglosphere PPD and Everyone Else PPD but damn I would be lonely.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 09:05 PM
1

So what's special about "NYC" cheesecake?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 08:47 PM
7

On the first day of marriage my true love gave to me Shit answers to my shit tests. On the second day of marriage my true love gave to me, Time at the gym and shit answers to my shit tests. On the third day of marriage my true love gave to me, Three new plates, time at the gym, and shit answers to my shit tests.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 08:40 PM
8

I don't understand these questions. People get into relationships because they want to, so everyone involved is getting something out of it, or at least under the impression that they are getting something out of it. A partner to grow old with. A parent for their kids. Someone fun to share their life with, if only briefly. Someone who supports them. Kisses and hugs and cuddles and those big lovey-dovey eyes. And, yeah, good sex with someone compatible.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 08:33 PM
13

12 levels of dread and their undying loyalty.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 08:29 PM
6

I usually really like your comments but I think you may be dead to me now.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 08:21 PM
2

My boyfriend doesn't get frequent sex out of this relationship, so there's probably something else for him (though the sex is, at least, good). My best guess: He says I give the best cuddles. He's in love with my boobs. Also, says I have soft skin. I listen to his complaints and offer emotional support. He has told me I am his best friend and he tells me shit he doesn't tell anyone else. This coming from a social, extroverted person who has more friends than I do, several of whom he calls his be…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 08:19 PM
1

Deleted who?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 08:06 PM
7

Trust me, the sources are nothing special -- just the first few relevant and not-completely-shitty links that came up when I googled the topic. You will find a lot more if you want to. The question in your OP is pretty easy to answer and quite a bit of research has been done.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 07:27 PM
2

Sorry, if you get pleasure from sex with a stranger you are probably obese and have addiction problems. PPD just keeps getting weirder.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 07:04 PM
2

She meant physical pleasure outside of orgasm. It's not like the only part of sex that feels good are the few seconds of orgasm.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 06:46 PM
11

Yes, it really does take two to make a successful (arbitrary criteria is arbitrary) relationship I absolutely agree. I also absolutely disagree that one of those two reading and posting on MRP is what it takes to make a marriage successful. The third post right now on MRP is a guy talking about fucking other women despite "loving" his wife who by his own admission is doing her part. And sex is not an issue in their marriage but who cares because TRP is amoral. Oh, but of course, he's there becau…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 06:26 PM
15

be a mix of alpha and beta qualities to be a great husband. They also teach that men need to be strong and provide their wife with a solid foundation upon which she can lean. Is there any inherent problems with this? In theory no, sounds fine. In practice the sub is pretty icky and it doesn't take any digging to find people advocating cheating (even on a not-terrible wife). I'm wondering if maybe it isn't The Red Pill philosophy itself that people turn away from, but rather the type of men invol…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 05:51 PM
13

Funny that you tell me "Let's not go there" when the only person bringing up child support here is you. Child support doesn't erase the fact that one parent's career was "crippled" by decisions made within the marriage, which was what your post was about.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 05:18 PM
8

Marriage itself has not conclusively been found to negatively affect a woman's earnings; motherhood has. 2016 report, some other paper, in Australia, some article briefly explainijng who earns less. The general consensus is that married men make the most money out of all groups, and childless women make more than mothers (who earn the least). Makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 04:55 PM
1

Yup. Timmy may have taken the first step but he doesn't have more influence over the end result.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 02:56 PM
3

Without Timmy there would be no band. Without anyone wanting to join there would be no band.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 02:49 PM
5

I get amused by this type of post -- If you had to choose between an ugly rich old feminist dude who's bad in bed and a poor hot misogynist who treats you like shit but rocks your world in bed, who would you pick and why is it the most hypergamous option? It can be an entertaining thought experiment, but at the end of the day extremes like in this OP don't matter to the vast majority of people.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 02:20 PM
8

Many would argue casual sex is a "type of sex" and that it does matter. If you're not at all into Girl 2's kinks and she needs them to have a fulfilling sex life, then you're sexually incompatible; who cares about red flags in that case. If your kinks are compatible then what's the big deal? Sounds perfect. Both of your scenarios would be immediate dealbreakers (and huge red flags) for me personally. For some people, one would be a dealbreaker and the other not. You can't really say one flag is …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 02:19 PM
2

Nice title. Took me a minute.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 12:42 AM
16

Yeah. My mother worked while my father got his degree, then she stayed home and raised us kids and followed him wherever his career took him (moved at least 7 times between 4 countries) for the next couple decades. The kids are out of the house now but she's in her fifties and now is not exactly the time to build a career... she gave up those years for her family. I'm not saying it was a huge sacrifice she was bullied into and regrets; I am saying it was a mutual decision in their marriage and I…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/18 12:40 AM
1

Was he like this when they got married? Because if so... I would get tired of hearing her complain but not do anything about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 07:03 PM
3

Is this supposed to be a gotcha? I explicitly said I don't always ask for it verbally. I'm aware of that. I don't believe in a relationship you need a verbal "yes" every time you escalate -- you can say that that is what I said, if you wish. Not that I "never" ask for consent when I literally said I sometimes still do. I don't always ask for it verbally, though I sometimes do (even within my LTR). What I was saying is the definition of enthusiastic consent, as some people in some US colleges thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 01:49 PM
1

My only celebrity crush is Emma Watson, probably 99% due to her playing Hermione. She's not old though. Also, not a guy. I thought John Barrowman as Jack Harkness in Torchwood, and David Tennant as the Doctor, were quite hot despite their ages. But again, it has a lot to do with the character for me (although Barrowman's personality in The Making of Me was also very appealing).
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:50 PM
3

Please, do elaborate.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:26 PM
3

Yeah, I did say "mainly" a US campus thing and that "most states" did not follow that definition. Good luck having the police believe you as a male rape victim though. Yeah. But he can try. If it didn't then why do so many feminists frame it that way? I'm not really into the whole US college feminist thing, but afaik the consent form thing is not a feminist idea, and at a glance, a quick google says sources talking about affirmative or enthusiastic consent admit consent can be given through word…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:24 PM
7

I'm not exactly a militant feminist, but I'll take a stab at this one anyway. First things first: I'm pretty sure many (most) states' laws don't follow this "new standard of enthusiastic consent," and certainly most countries don't. That seems to be mainly a US campus thing. But yeah, if a guy has been raped, in the US he can take it to the authorities. So? Now to answer the title question, yeah I always have enthusiastic consent. I don't always ask for it verbally, though I sometimes do (even w…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:05 PM
3

I imagine she doesn't mean that it's okay if the guy doesn't consent, but more something along the lines of men in her experience being usually very, and visibly, enthusiastic about the sex they're having.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 11:41 AM
1

Eh, I don't know about that. The only claim I was tackling was the money thing you asserted. The idea, as I understand it, is that family is not exclusively genetic. If a man signed the birth certificate (or some other legal document recognizing the child as his own) and raised the kid for more than 5 years, in the eyes of the government that's his kid. There's also the fact that it's considered that DNA testing isn't something that should be "casual," because you know, it's your DNA, and the ki…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 01:10 AM
1

I was thinking about allocations familiales, which is not 80 per month and for which everyone qualifies. Edit: There's other stuff more closely tied to income, like prime à la naissance, etc. But in general I wouldn't say the government is afraid of funding families and that's why they don't want paternity tests.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:43 AM
2

How do you reckon it has anything to do with government funds? In France the state gives you money every month for having 2+ kids. How would paternity testing hurt their funds? Sure there is help for families who are struggling financially, so if the non-dad leaves and the actual dad can't pay child support I can see the state giving some aid... But I don't think this would affect enough families to really have an impact.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:25 AM
1

Merci, now I only have to google Jerry Springer.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/18 12:15 AM
5

Can confirm. Am French, love baguette, have no idea who Maury Povich is.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 10:23 PM
5

So I meet someone and think, "Hey, they would be a great match for my partner" and I magically know they would be happier together? I would not encourage it, no. Unless we'd already broken up and had somehow remained on excellent terms. It would be his decision to make, but I'd never encourage him to leave me if he hadn't given me any sign that he wasn't happy in the relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 07:48 PM
3

I don't believe in soulmates and I don't believe throwing away a good relationship you have invested time in for something uncertain is a safe and sure path to happiness. To me the relationship you described, that I would hypothetically be leaving, sounds awesome. However, if there was a way to know for certain that: You will be happier than you are. This person will be happier with you than your current partner is and that the relationship would be successful, then I would probably leave if I w…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 07:23 PM
1

Physique: Average height, healthy weight, decently strong, unfortunately has a beard. White. Dark hair. Voice: Normal range I guess. Doesn't quite have a lisp but the sound "sh" often makes its way into words it has no business showing up in. I find it very cute. Body language: Closed off when he's focused on something else but just average otherwise. Bites his fingernails. Terrible posture. Personality: Funny, extroverted, easily frustrated, determined, needy, kind, nerdy, negative, sociable. O…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 06:48 PM
1

I would say so. I've always had mixed-gender groups of friends. People I get along with, hang out with for fun, and chat to catch up with if we've been apart. Not a really intimate, super close friendship with a man whom I tell everything, but I don't have those kinds of friendships with women either. Most men and women I know have friends of both genders, even attractive ones. Even if one friend finds the other attractive in a "would bang if the opportunity came up" way, it doesn't put a friend…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 02:53 PM
-1

Past 20: Not a red flag. Past 25: I'd be surprised, a bit wary (Not Oh no he doesn't know how to do the sex, but Is he ready for a relationship?), but still willing if we clicked and he seemed mature. Past 30: The age itself is a hard no for me anyway, and by the time it isn't I'll have some LTR experience and would be very wary of dating someone who didn't. Virgin at 30 to me implies no serious relationship, asexual, or waiting for marriage. Of those three the second option would be the least r…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/18 11:25 AM
1

I feel one has to be pretty optimistic to think most men display those traits. I don't think most people do. And IMO I am surrounded by very decent people. But there's not really an argument I can oppose to "your view is colored by your personal experiences," so all right. Agree to disagree.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/18 10:54 PM
3

Sure, okay. I don't actively select for "would be a good father" because having kids is extremely low on my list of priorities. So I'm not complaining that there are "not enough" of those guys. However I was mostly talking about friends, classmates, roommates, acquaintances (guys I know), and one boyfriend that I "selected." I think my "issue" is more likely to be that I hang out with relatively young guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/18 08:02 PM
9

Probably not many. Most guys I know don't show many of those green flags. My boyfriend hardly displays any. I don't think most parents turn out to be good parents anyway. Most of them probably do "okay." Maybe if they had to parent their siblings for some reason because their parents couldn’t Yeah, doing that and still wanting kids of his own would be a green flag.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/18 05:53 PM
19

Nothing is foolproof. Sure there can be some glaring red flags, but for the majority of people you can't magically "tell." Inserting kids into a relationship (or just a life) is always going to be a big change. Some green flags, IMO: you've been together for a long time and don't think there are huge red flags about his parenting abilities (this is basically the best you can do) he's responsible he's the eldest brother in a big family and still wants kids he's hard to gross out he's patient he h…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/18 04:48 PM
1

I don't even see why it would be awkward! But yeah, pretty necessary.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/18 12:32 PM
2

Eh, I've been posting on PPD for more than a year (why?). I stand by what I said.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/18 01:45 AM
6

I thought this would be something light hearted and fun. Thoughts? I actually think this is one of the weirder and sadder threads I've read here.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/18 01:21 AM
6

Sounds extreme to me, but thanks for the laugh. In his case it's more that he wouldn't be able to get past me killing his own kid. Financially speaking, we could have it (lol -- he could have it), so he says it's selfish to abort. And he's right, my reasons would be entirely selfish. I'm okay with that and he isn't. Birth control for the win.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/18 12:24 AM
5

Of course he's allowed to leave me if he wants to. You on the other hand don't get to "allow" abortion, and "financial abortion" isn't really a thing afaik.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/18 09:27 PM
2

My boyfriend is the one who "doesn't believe in" abortion and would probably leave me if I got one. I think it's a good conversation to have.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/18 08:58 PM
3

I missed the announcement too
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 11:42 PM
1

They are a lot of fun. Don't go calling me odd now. :D
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 11:39 PM
9

"Women rate 80% of waitresses as below average!"
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 11:32 PM
1

I'd be shipping Harry and Draco, but the fic is called a slash fic. To ship just means to support a romantic relationship between two characters. Draco/Hermione is also a ship, but it's not slash, because it's a guy and a girl. ... I know too much about fandom.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 11:29 PM
1

It is fanfiction depicting a sexual or romantic relationship between two dudes. Can be novel-length, or much shorter. For example, if I write a story where Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy have sex, that's slash.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 11:26 PM
3

Here if you want to read some arguments.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 11:21 PM
1

Draco/Harry, Kirk/Spock... Draco slash Harry, Kirk slash Spock. The virgule ("slash") indicates a romantic pairing in fandom. For some reason though "slash fiction" only refers to two guys getting it on.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 05:11 PM
2

Additional reading: Why Slash? Slash Terminology History of Slash
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 03:53 PM
6

They haven't left yet, so it's not any more difficult than it was "prior to Brexit." Travel between the UK and the rest of the EU hasn't changed yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 02:36 PM
5

In fanfic, "Kirk&Spock" is friendship but "Kirk/Spock" is a romantic pairing. The name comes from that slash; for some reason the name slash only has same-sex connotations even though you also write het pairings the same way.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 02:22 PM
1

No, I wouldn't say that. A well-written story will let me identify with a character regardless of gender. But since it doesn't turn me on to imagine myself present, I don't do it when the fic turns sexy. I don't do it with femslash or het fics either, but it's more likely to "accidentally" happen and pull me out of the story if there's someone with my body parts in it. In general though, it's not really a thing for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 02:18 PM
13

Oh, this thread is for me. I'm a woman in my early twenties and have been reading and writing fanfiction since I was a pre-teen. My reading and writing preferences only got slashier (gayer) as I grew up -- it's not the only thing I read, but a majority of the fics I go for involve two male characters getting it on. Also, if I want additional stimulation for some reason when I masturbate, I'll turn to erotic fanfiction (not porn). I can't say that I usually put more thought into this than Hey, th…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 11:44 AM
7

Some people overrate sex, or at least, put so much emphasis on it that I see it as overrating. I also think that sex is not worth the extraordinary time/energy/money investments that the average person expends on it. The average person doesn't really. People I know have sex in a relationship, in which case the time, effort, and money goes into more than just sex, or have casual sex every so often when they're interested enough in someone to go for it. They're hardly spending "extraordinary" amou…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/18 02:33 AM
2

I wouldn't have said "going on dates" was normal behavior for FWBs.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/18 12:31 AM
1

Yeah, I really wouldn't want to rely on online dating only. Sounds like online dating and apps aren't your thing and you'd do better meeting people organically through friends of friends or hobbies -- but that does get more difficult after college.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/18 10:53 PM
12

I can actually agree that a lot of dating advice given to a man by women may not be useful to that man, but not because women don't understand how they experience attraction. Women know when they are sexually attracted to someone and if they stop to think about it, they can pinpoint at least some of the triggers. When a woman says a guy's presence and confidence are important for attraction (and they say it a lot), when she says looks aren't everything or muscles aren't that important, she is sa…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/18 10:50 PM
5

This is pretty funny.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/18 10:27 PM
1

Yeah, I get it! Frustration is understandable.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/18 10:24 PM
1

I take it you've had many such romantic disappointments? Since it would be a pretty extreme reaction over one girl you messaged for a bit on Tinder. I doubt even RP would say she owed you anything much.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/18 07:29 PM
14

push/pull Playing hard to get can work very well for a woman. I'm sure it can work similarly on women, though possibly less reliably because more women need to feel wanted to be turned on. It's not something I'd recommend, but I wouldn't say it can't work. teasing I absolutely don't deny that teasing is an effective way to establish and maintain rapport with someone. I think it's part of normal human interaction. It is something I do with significant others but also friends, classmates, family m…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/18 01:54 PM
3

social programs are an entitlement to someone else’s body through the taxation of their labor. I'll be sure to keep that in mind...
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/18 11:31 AM
11

I just googled that and will be observing the roommates over the next few days, haha. I never stopped to think about it before but it's interesting, thanks. Apparently it's a confrontation thing. I tend to face off and look the other person in the eye when trying to resolve a conflict, so this could be something to think about.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/18 11:29 PM
3

No problem, being a prick is pretty normal here.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/18 11:15 PM
2

Yeah, that's obviously what I meant. Dude has been confiding in me for about a year now. I'll live.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/18 11:06 PM
3

I don't really understand what the big deal is about paying for dates in the first place. If you asked her out maybe she expects you to pay, but you're planning the date so you can choose a cheap place or just do something free for the first date. If there are follow-up dates (or, heaven forbid, a relationship), splitting or alternating who pays isn't that difficult.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/18 06:56 PM
10

I think people are talking about different things when they say "Women don't leave men for opening up emotionally." I don't dump guys for being as open as I am. As open as my friends are to me. About their concerns for the future, their feelings of inadequacy, that they miss their family. Most of the issues in that thread were big things that would seriously affect a relationship. I'm not surprised a partner's depression could lead to the end of a relationship, and don't think it's necessarily a…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/18 08:33 PM
10

If you like women, would you be sexually attracted to a girly, pretty, willowy man?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/18 04:34 PM
2

Seems obvious looks are very important in the gay male community.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/18 04:13 PM
2

I wouldn't want to get back with someone who had dumped me. Not because I was unhappy before they dumped me and wanted them to dump me, but because breakups don't happen for no reason. I would be concerned we hadn't resolved the problem and that they would end up leaving again, and knowing myself, that worry would poison the relationship. I have not initiated relationships, however I've been both the dumper and the dumpee. If someone wants to break up they should initiate a break up. If they wan…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/18 01:58 PM
2

Probably bigger better deal. Not a porn category, I know.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/18 01:52 PM
2

Friend with relationship troubles just sent me, "Why can't I find a simple and nice girl to be with?" #wherehaveallthenicegirlsgone Some of my friends my age act like their current problems means they're doomed forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 11:59 PM
5

I play with my hair all the time. I'm doing it right now in front of my computer. So I'm sure I have done it as an IOI, but also (and way more often) as a nope not an IOI at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 07:41 PM
2

Yuck
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 02:02 PM
8

I was never told men only want one thing. To my knowledge, I haven't been cheated on. I don't wear makeup. I was a loner in high school and thought the clueless boys and and the hottest girls deserved each other because I had zero interest in either group, lol. I'm blue, but the knowledge you appear to be referencing -- that men want to have sex with pretty young women and are not incapable of cheating -- was made available to me through books, movies, TV shows, fanfiction, and real life observa…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 01:40 PM
3

I would find it mind-blowing, in a cute way, if there were people on PPD of all places that defined love this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 12:25 AM
9

I joined reddit almost 3 years ago and have been single for about 3 months in those 3 years. I think I found the pill subs a few months after I joined, but I don't see my life experiences reflected in the most bitter things I read here and I choose to go with what my experiences say than what reddit does. Pills certainly had nothing to do with my entering my current relationship. The only way it has affected it is that my boyfriend thinks we're all awful people and can't understand why I bother …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/18 12:14 AM
0

Why wouldn't it be all or nothing? Validating or not validating is a yes/no thing. I said nothing about "lowest form of male humans" (and said nothing about chasing, but all right). It's not just about the guy's value, but about men's sex drives. Men, as a group, have no standards. (Note that I'm not saying individual men don't have standards.) So knowing that I can go out and find a guy to fuck isn't validating. It's not a statement about how sexy I am, it's a statement about how thirsty men ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 09:05 PM
2

We're all weirdos here.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 04:39 PM
6

I doubt threads here are very representative of "dating these days"!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 04:39 PM
0

I've been posting on here long enough to be aware of your first point. It does not contradict mine. As for for second point, You may not see an abundance of poor choices as validating, but you probably have at least a baseline idea of what your realistic options are on the dating market Not really. If there are low value men offering every woman a drink, and I receive a drink from a low value man, it does not tell me if I am high value or low value. Similarly, if any man tries to fuck me, the on…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 04:29 PM
1

I feel inclined to disagree. I get validation when my friends tell me I'm pretty but if I can't get attention from the kind of guy I want, I'm not going to think oh, abundance, nice.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 03:46 PM
2

I will grant that women are capable of recognizing other women as being pretty or beautiful. That's not the same thing as being attracted though. Women can look at a woman and say, "She's beautiful" but be utterly repulsed at the idea of having sex with a woman. Since you think all women are bi, not exclusively gay, apparently you know that there are other factors to attraction than "the female body is pretty."
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 12:25 PM
3

I feel like that isn't true You think gay men and straight women are more sexually attracted to women's bodies than to men's bodies? Oh well. I think the opposite. Have fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 12:07 PM
1

I think this mainly due to the fact that the average guy sucks at sex. Nah. You don't need a bad sexual experience to know you're into women or not. the female body on average is 10x more beautiful than the average guy's. I mean, I can see why you think that, but the male body is more sexually attractive to a straight woman or a gay guy than the female body. Obviously. 1) Have sex with the same person repeatedly and you'll get very good at sex with that person. Alternatively, read She Comes Firs…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 11:43 AM
1

And that explains why I've had a girl friend complain before about never getting asked out despite getting asked out more in a year than I ever have in my life. I mean that is easy to explain. She is a woman, you are a man; of course she's going to get asked out more. Women don't do much of the asking out.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 10:38 PM
1

I agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 09:52 PM
3

not desperate for sexual opportunities So having a low, or even just a responsive, sex drive is enough to have abundance mentality? Not very harmful then.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 08:51 PM
7

But validation isn't exactly abundance.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 08:44 PM
6

using dating apps just to get validated by men who women have no intention of ever meeting going out clubbing, just to get validated This is not harmful to a woman. She has no intention of meeting him because she isn't interested in him. That's not the same thing as having an abundance of men she is interested in willing to give her what she is interested in. It's unproductive for either gender to be completely delusional. To think you can marry whichever guy you like just by batting your eyelas…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 07:53 PM
3

IMO the only way to avoid a dead bedroom is to not accept one. You can't predict everything. Often there are red flags, but sometimes you just don't know until it's too late. Tell your partner early on that sex is a critical part of the relationship to you and that you want it to be frequent and for both parties to enjoy it. If they say they don't have a sex drive, don't stay. If they say sex isn't important to them, don't stay. They are explicitly telling you you two are incompatible. Be attent…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 05:42 PM
2

If it's just "Would you rather" rather than "Would one make for a better relationship/sex life?", then Beta Bob is absolutely allowed to prefer the former and I have no issue with that. That's not what OP was addressing. Men watch porn all the time for reasons that have nothing to do with their current SO being terrible in bed. To answer your question, the former -- in the context of a relationship with a healthy sex life. But if I'm terrible in bed and/or my SO has zero attraction to me and our…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 02:52 PM
1

Not usually, no, you're imagining things or she's not that wholesome, she's playing hard to get or she doesn't like you that much and only plays "hot" when it benefits her (you can tell which by how cold she gets), run, why would you want them to keep calling?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 12:16 PM
3

Curiosity/desire for something better vs just desire for something better? Women can know they're having bad sex even if they've never had good sex. Women can know they're not very sexually attracted even if they've never had sex with someone they were super into.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 11:37 AM
3

Back home this has rarely been something I thought about and has certainly never gotten in the way of enjoying life. A month into my stay in Argentina I had been catcalled and approached more than in a year back home. I've taken to avoiding eye contact with strangers. I deliberately duck my head or turn it away when I'm passing a man or group of men in the street. I feel much less comfortable outside here, and it definitely affects "quality of life" IMO. I took a taxi to the airport alone and th…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/18 04:19 AM
3

Yeah, it still greatly reduces the risk IMO (it's waaay easier to end up in a situation where a male friend is into you than a "straight" female friend), but it's not perfect. The alternative is "never be alone with anyone who isn't a family member." Which sounds very restrictive. No thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 10:41 PM
2

Would a "Christian" answer count as "objective" to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 10:23 PM
1

Fair enough, but there is a report button.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 10:21 PM
1

Prostitutes may not count as cheating in his mind or to his wife, but it'd be a mistake to think that mindset is widespread in Germany (among women at least) just because prostitution is legal.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 10:19 PM
1

I think you should go back to T_D.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 10:15 PM
12

I feel like this is a joke reply to a joke thread. Yet a man is an asshole if he is NOT okay with his SO seeing a therapist As much as he would be an asshole for asking her not to go to the gyno. Or as much as she would be a bitch for not being okay with him seeing a therapist. It's a health issue (which was the first and main point in my comment). Mostly though, he's just a weirdo. Yes, a woman can expect sexual fidelity in a relationship. So can a man. Look out at the real world -- happens eve…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 10:13 PM
5

Maybe never be alone with anyone whose sexual orientation includes your gender? Like, a bisexual guy "could" be alone with straight guys and lesbians.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 09:48 PM
47

My opinion is this post is a joke, but on the off chance that it isn't... It counts as an emotional affair if you are being romantic or flirting with your therapist, or have romantic feelings for them and are encouraging them to grow. Otherwise, having a professional "relationship" with a therapist is no more an affair than seeing your gyno is. Additionally, your SO presumably knows you are seeing a therapist and is okay with that professional relationship. That is usually not the case when some…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 04:39 PM
2

Sex could be directly redistributed, or cash might be redistributed in compensation. Am picturing "normies" having to pay a tax whenever they get laid so that incels can receive monetary compensation.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 04:31 PM
3

It is certainly possible to know within 15 seconds of meeting a guy that you will never ever be atttacted to him. It's also possible to feel an immediate spark. However, after only 15 seconds most people just fall into the "Who knows" category. Not repulsive, maybe cute; maybe very physically attractive but you're just not intrigued. Some interaction can move them squarely to the "Hell no!" category or to the "Fuck yes" category, but often that will take a lot more than 15 seconds. Cold approach…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 04:15 PM
10

I didn't say anything about myself, actually. I commented under automod on a Q4M. Don't know what your problem is.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 12:51 AM
7

Sure, but that's not the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 12:42 AM
5

I know? I'm just saying it happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 12:41 AM
10

Men fall for, and chase, women who treat them like shit all the time. Yes, I'm aware it also happens the other way around.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/18 12:25 AM
5

It can depend on the guy for some people because obviously there are men who can't grow good beards and there are men whose face is better shown off by being clean-shaven. It also depends on the woman. Personally I always strongly prefer clean shaven or stubble/ short beard (like 1cm max). It's very much a personal preference and lots of women love beards. My boyfriend shaved before his recent visit to me and it was so sexy to me. He mostly wears his beard longer than I prefer (I think it makes …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/18 08:05 PM
4

I saw the title and thought Bullshit but turns out they're not actually talking about 15% of women so I can click away.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/18 06:23 PM
4

What's the deception in the second one?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/18 03:02 PM
3

I launched preemptive strike on the makeup comments I know, but this is PPD.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/18 02:49 PM
6

I always find it so amusing when people bring up makeup on here.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/18 02:38 PM
5

I am an atheist. My boyfriend wants kids some day; I've told him I would not have kids outside of marriage. When she heard this my mom told me she said the exact same thing to my dad, back in the day. I'm not having kids with a boyfriend anymore than I'm sharing finances with a roommate. If we have kids, I want us to be a family, and for me marriage is a part of that. I want them to grow up in a similar family structure to the one I had. It's probable I will never consider having kids out of wed…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/18 10:33 AM
8

I sincerely hope, for their sakes, that every feminist on reddit is staying away from this thread.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 07:05 PM
31

I got bullied by a few assholes on school. A few. Male and female. Everyone else was basically decent to me, because most people are capable of treating people with common courtesy. IME that proportion increases after the hell that is high school. Some strong men already do bully women. Some strong men don't. It's an asshole thing, not a gender thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 06:51 PM
4

Her attraction can be killed by lousy sex, sure, but why assume a woman who has a ONS is "obviously not that attracted until after"?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 06:45 PM
5

obviously the woman isn't that attracted until after you have sex ?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 06:29 PM
33

Yes, exactly. People are working with different definitions of respect when these threads come up. If a woman says she wants a man to respect her she usually doesn't mean she wants him to look up to her or think she's better than him or treat her like an authority figure. Usually, she's just talking about common decency -- baseline "treat me like a person" respect. When someone says, "I respect [this person]," they are usually not using the same meaning of the word respect as when they say, "Eve…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 06:28 PM
4

They did use punctuation: a comma directly followed by an ellipsis. :(
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 04:03 PM
1

I put that bit in parentheses because I'm obviously aware it's not the point. I addressed earning potential and field of study in that comment. We're not in disagreement. Most women in college date the athletic classmate, not the older out of shape guy with a career.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 03:47 PM
1

I'm don't even experience sexual attraction to men in a "spontaneous," "ladyboner" way so i was confused why that was the bar for bisexuality. But I agree with how you've explained attraction here. Thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 03:21 PM
1

Does that sound like how women are attracted to men to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 03:16 PM
1

What do you mean by spontaneously? I'm not sure I've been physically spontaneously sexually attracted to anyone in my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 02:41 PM
2

Being able to recognize someone is attractive isn't the same thing as being attracted to them. Most women are not attracted to women. We often get threads on here with guys posting pics of guys they think are attractive or ugly. It's not like men are blind.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 02:02 PM
3

A small percentage. I mean, it's pretty obvious the overwhelming majority of women are straight (though I think we had a thread on here asking if completely straight women even existed, lol). I have met very few other bisexual women, despite hanging out in LGBT circles in college. I don't think what determines sexuality is purely biological or purely environmental or purely societal (especially not the last one).
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 01:59 PM
2

lol
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 12:34 AM
5

I explicitly, specifically said in that same comment that I do not And I explained in this comment why I mentioned the empire-building thing. Seems like your reading skills might still need some work. It was never about "morally reprehensible stuff" or "what men do for me vs what I wish they would do for me," only about "this is my personal experience with men doing or not doing stuff for me and how I feel about the experiences I have had, as an answer to the OP." I stated how my experiences mad…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 12:32 AM
3

Apparently my prize is not arguing about this anymore. That's nice.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 12:27 AM
3

Can I be an official member of the Jammerly Fan Club?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 12:26 AM
4

Why mention empire-building in the first place? I mentioned empire building as one of the more ridiculous examples from the OP ("No man has ever done any of this stuff for me, because they are ridiculous examples" was the intent), and ended with "lose their shit" as the least ridiculous example from the OP, and one where I actually had examples I could use to answer the "How does it feel?" question. Rather, you were saying, "Empire building good, being a weirdo/loser bad." I was not saying that.…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 12:20 AM
9

Yet it's the exact same phrasing. You just added a whole lot of made-up bullshit afterwards. Having a man kill for you isn't like winning the Super Bowl. I've heard the pain of passing a kidney stone is excruciating but I'd still take that over having my boyfriend kill some other dude over me. I can assert that I did not say "I wish they did" and I did not think "I wish they did," and I find it easy to believe most other commenters also meant that. You're trying to tell us what we're thinking, w…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/18 12:00 AM
11

We answered "No one has ever done that for me" because OP asked "How does it feel personally when men do this stuff for you?" "How did it feel when you passed a kidney stone?" "Well, I haven't passed a kidney stone, so I don't know how it feels... but I wish I had!"
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 11:38 PM
4

I'm 22. How important is physical fitness for you compared to economic success in a man? The first is important for attraction; the second is important for relationship potential. Since I don't do casual sex, both are pretty important, but each is more of a pass/fail thing than "the more of it he has, the more I want him." Which do you find makes you more attracted to a man? Fitness. Money doesn't really affect how attracted I am to him, but earning potential probably affects my assessment of hi…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 11:35 PM
15

Q4HelenofTroy
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 10:45 PM
4

I am fairly certain no empire has ever been built for me. The closest a guy has come to losing their shit when they couldn't "get" me was threatening to attempt suicide again (coming from a guy with existing mental health issues who at the time was in a hospital bed recovering from his second suicide attempt, both having allegedly been over a girl (though obviously there was more to them)) or spamming me with texts. The first feels absolutely shitty, and the second is just annoying, if you're wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 10:37 PM
4

Like favors or things of monetary value? I haven't. I don't really try to draw attention to my sexuality outside of relationships, though guys sexualize you anyway. Obviously I do my best to look sexy for my boyfriend because I want him to think I'm sexy, so I do get something out of that.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 07:07 PM
1

1: No idea. 2: IME, men fall faster (not necessarily deeper but faster) and are more likely to confuse infatuation with love. Reports/surveys tend to indicate there's either no gender difference or men fall a bit faster. 3: I only said it first once, to a woman (I mean one of us had to). With guys they have been the ones to say it first, not because that's my strategy but because they said it way before I felt it. They probably didn't give the same meaning to the words as I do. I was stunned whe…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 12:53 PM
3

That's a weird opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/18 12:40 PM
8

I haven't the slightest clue what this thread is about.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 05:52 PM
1

It doesn't need to be precise to the day for a trend to be obvious. If men say they fall in love in approximately 4 weeks on average, and women say "Oh, around 2 months," it's pretty safe to say men fall faster. If both say around 4 weeks, there's no significant gender difference. It's much less flawed than thinking a proposal reflects a guy finally falling in love.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 05:29 PM
2

Those are some damn shitty relationships. And anyway, in those relationships it works both ways: if the guy "gets lazy ," sex will probably get worse and less frequent. It's hard to maintain attraction for someone who doesn't put effort into the relationship anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 05:24 PM
2

Basically what I am saying here is that men have to recognize they need to continue to exceed expectations to maintain a long term happy relationship There is nothing related to this idea in the body of the post. I would venture to say you're not very good at saying what you mean to say.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 05:06 PM
1

Sometimes, and in the other studies there is no gender difference. Okay, maintain that you are correct and I will maintain you are wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 05:03 PM
1

Desiring commitment is not the same thing as falling in love. Falling in love is based on feelings. Men sometimes report falling in love faster than women do; in other studies there is no gender difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 04:52 PM
9

Men may express love first Well at least I got you to say you may be wrong about that. f men were more love prone then we would not hear countless stories about women complaining about being ghosted after a night of good companionship and sex. Those women are not "in love." They are somewhat into the guy and looking for a few dates that could lead to a relationship. Being ghosted sucks, especially if you wanted more from that specific guy. That specific guy isn't interested in a relationship wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 04:35 PM
7

It's certainly not the case that the woman "often expresses her love first." I mean if we're just going off our personal observations, the only time I said "I love you" first was to another woman, 9 months into our relationship, and the fastest I've heard an "I love you" was from a guy I'd never dated and had met 2 weeks prior. More generally, studies find men tend to say it first and are more "love-prone". In heterosexual relationships, it’s commonly assumed that the woman is the one who says “…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 04:25 PM
10

That doesn't fit real life. Men are more likely to say I love you first.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 04:05 PM
12

I disagree that a proposal is the mark of a man falling in love with a woman. He's typically been in love for quite a while before that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 03:59 PM
14

I also view women's capacity to love faster and fall out of it to be more compatible with the requirements of childbearing. An unsuitable mate for a woman is more harmful to her long term reproductive success. Giving birth places a person in an incredibly vulnerable condition I can use that logic to say that due to the vetting process being more intensive for a woman, since she has more to risk... she falls in love slower. What makes you say that women fall faster?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 03:52 PM
2

I'm stubborn and passive-aggressive. Not very productive for my goal of having a healthy happy relationship. Disagreements get stupid. What do you, if anything, to fix or mitigate it I'm aware of it but I haven't taken effective steps to improve. I apologize when my SO calls me out on it and fix it.. for about 60 minutes. I don't know if I would say it's my fault but it's certainly on me to improve.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 02:58 PM
4

The alcohol is in addition to everything else, not an alternative route.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 07:52 AM
2

Except she's a married woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 01:11 AM
14

I doubt I've ever met a top 1%, but it's not like I crave casual sex or drool over celebrity pics, so I don't see why a top 1% body would change that. Get to know me, start spending a significant amount of time with me, make it seem like they want a LTR with me, call me their girlfriend for a while beforehand, and make me feel sexually desired so I start sexually desiring them. Past observations indicate chances of success increase with tipsiness.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 01:08 AM
5

I imagine with every new partner there's something to learn about what they, personally, like.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/18 12:19 AM
15

Seriously, it's like "doesn't know what he's doing" is incurable. Every Chad was a virgin at some point.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 11:58 PM
2

He already thought we were weirdos but now he's baffled I can stand the sub at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 09:50 PM
4

Why is it funny that someone who's never read TRP material doesn't know what a "shit test" is? That's just normal. Most of the world has no idea because TRP came up with some weird lingo. They also don't know what AWALT stands for.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 09:48 PM
3

Even TRP's sidebar material knows people shit test outside of "wanting to fuck" situations.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 09:45 PM
2

Yes, it's fuzzy because I have a shit memory for interactions. Oh, and because I was drunk. You remembering about shit testing him would probably bring about some unpleasant emotions Why? Shit testing is teasing and fun. What about the next day when you're sober? We met on a short study abroad program and were drunk for two weeks straight, and then we went back home to our respective countries to nurse the hangover of our lives. Then, sober, we started texting. One thing I remember that could qu…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 08:56 PM
3

It's a special memory but that doesn't mean it isn't fuzzy as hell. It's not like I knew I was meeting my future boyfriend. We joke a lot about that night because I was drunk and don't remember the details at all. Whenever we talk about it I learn something new. I said no when he asked for a kiss; that's the standout exchange I remember from that night. I'm a bit stupid when drunk anyway, and he was drunk as hell too. Shit tests are harder to give and easier to pass when drunk.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 08:43 PM
4

He doesn't have to wait, she doesn't have to have sex before she wants to. It's not really hard -- if it's a deal breaker then either is free to break the deal. If you're not compatible you're not compatible. Why don’t some women understand that a guy isn’t obligated to stay and wait? Why don’t some guys just move on? What do you all think about this situation? I think it's overblown.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 08:04 PM
3

To me it's the same thing as not remembering the details of the last conversation I had with my parents when I saw them in January.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 07:51 PM
3

I just tease with whatever is natural in the conversation. No examples come to mind, sorry. I've been in a relationship for a couple years so I still tease a bunch, but not with potential romantic interests. I don't do first dates and haven't noticed being tested in a cold approach (more like being invited to test them), so can't help there either.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 07:37 PM
3

I mostly agree with the sidebar post which says shit tests are often used to test for social competence, and not just in male/female reactions. I don't agree with all the "how to pass a shit test examples there and I think red pillers on reddit tend to see shit tests where there are none. Have you shit tested a man before? I tease a lot, so I guess so, yeah. My friends, SOs, family members, roommates have all been able to take it and give as good as they get. It's probably a test to see if our s…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 07:27 PM
2

The TRP
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 07:12 PM
9

I'll have a hard time answering this question unless you provide a definition of shit testing for this thread and at least one example. Whenever I see these mentioned they either sound ridiculous and not like anything anyone would say in real life (so my answer would be no), sound like reading too much into a normal request, or just sound like overthinking normal teasing like I do with my friends and family members and roommates (in that case, yes).
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 07:12 PM
14

Just dropped the boyfriend off at the airport. Sigh. Yesterday he checked out PPD for about 3 minutes and said, "This place is awful, you should steer clear. What the FUCK -- this guy is such a... okay that's enough," and then we watched Silicon Valley instead.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 07:09 PM
6

Yeah, and I'm saying we disagree. One conversation isn't enough for me to trust someone to be my friend, let alone lover.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 12:43 PM
5

Well, we just disagree then. I can't really trust someone I don't know well. Trust the taxi driver to get me to my destination, okay. Actually trust them, nah.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 12:17 PM
4

It seems obvious that trust is built over time.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 12:12 PM
4

It's not that I don't want to. He's aroused and I'm not yet but I know I'll get there during the sex. So I don't turn him down.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/18 11:50 AM
10

Actually... I don't know. I'm not always aroused when my boyfriend and I start. I don't know if I would want that to change. Reduced rape rates would be great obviously.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/18 10:29 PM
3

But I'm happy with those results, so... what? I compliment my male friends so again, whatever. I know how to flirt. I'm not going to turn on hard flirting mode with a guy who hadn't demonstrated that he's receptive to my IOIs because I have no desire to. I have no desire to be the pursuer so your advice is useless to me. If a guy has not expressed interest in me, my interest is very light and it does me no harm to let it go. And I enjoy the initial uncertainty, gauging his reaction, ramping up t…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/18 01:01 PM
3

I'm not looking to be overt. I don't want to be rejected, and am rarely interested enough in a guy who hadn't already shown interest for it to be worth risking a rejection. If a guy doesn't seem interested my very light initial interest is going to fade and I'm fine with that. If I were dissatisfied with my love life I'm sure I'd ramp it up and more men would get a clue but that's not what I'm after. I give IOIs, most of them probably unconsciously, and if the reaction is positive I can flirt li…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/18 01:04 AM
2

It wouldn't be great but in some hypothetical situation where I have to choose, that's what I would choose.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 10:49 PM
2

I'd pick love. Like an asexual person who really loved me, I guess. I'd rather never have sex again, or never be desired again, than never be loved again. However, if he loved me but desired only other women, or wanted me but only loved other women, I wouldn't bother. Though the former would still be more flattering to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 10:37 PM
3

I was thinking about that in my comment too but plenty will also imagine IOIs from nothing. I'd find it irritating if the guy outright said "You smiled at me so I know you're into me, come on," but if he just tries and is faced with rejection, well, it's no different from any other approach where I'm not interested. I understand why women get annoyed, but if the guy knows how to take a rejection it's no big deal.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 10:32 PM
2

You appear to be confusing "mixed" with "subtle."
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 10:09 PM
3

What is anyone defining as IOIs? Cues, mostly non-verbal, that she is interested, no? So yeah, a smile can count, eye contact can count. Yes, they're relatively subtle. The point isn't to be so blatant that you're outright making the first hard move. Yet I've noticed people being into me before they made a formal move. Whether "most" men can pick up on my IOIs is not really a concern for me. I don't give deliberate IOIs to strangers from across the room, so I've never tried "a friendly glance" a…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 09:43 PM
8

My IOIs are subtle enough for plausible deniability, even when they're deliberate. I may feel disappointed, and I'll definitely assume he's not interested, but it's not really a strong, negative feeling of rejection. More like, Oh well, that didn't work. Edit: You people are hilarious. I answer I'm not frustrated but apparently you think I should change how I act around guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 08:48 PM
1

I agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 06:27 PM
6

Let's face it, every woman gets asked out several times a week That's ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 04:15 PM
3

I guess he was lying to me then.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 04:09 PM
2

I agree, he would be. It's very hard and he's young. He's leaning that way but has some scruples. Funny thing is he was crazy about her a few months back, starry-eyed in love and hopeful... until they actually got together again (she was an ex). Still, he already has a wandering eye and is sizing up his options -- another ex has come back into the picture -- so I'm fairly convinced he'll end up leaving. Ex has issues too though. He must like girls with problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 01:41 PM
3

I'm sorry you went through that. Most people are not good at supporting a friend/family member/SO in depression. I tried for months and was terrible at it because it seems there's nothing you can do that helps. My friend's girlfriend was diagnosed with depression last week and he came to me to talk about how he feels... and I'm pretty sure he will leave her soon. At the very least he is losing affection and attraction for her, because it's draining to be the support system of someone whom drugs …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/18 12:04 PM
2

Yeah, true in my experience -- young men though.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/18 06:45 PM
1

I don't approach randoms for sex so it's hard to imagine. If it were something I really wanted and I saw my friends got rejected far less often, I would probably feel unattractive and sad. If I were never approached for only sex it would be nice. If I could never get into a romantic relationship it would suck. If my boyfriend constantly rejected me for sex I'd feel unloved as well as unattractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/18 05:13 PM
3

I got Builder and Negotiator. BUILDERS are pillars of society. Most likely highly expressive of the serotonin system in the brain, they are traditional and conventional, as well as cautious, calm and often social. These men and women like to build networks; community and family are important to them. They make good managers because they are orderly, conscientious, thorough and loyal. And they respect rules and like schedules. Builders seek a stable and predictable team player, someone who shares…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/18 09:35 PM
6

We're talking about strangers right? Slight apprehension, initially. It goes away or intensifies depending on the nature of the approach. If he's not hitting on me (and needs the time or whatever) I'll relax. I'll feel flattered and thank him if he hits on me in a respectful way, and I'll feel irritated if he does it in a sexual way. If he's insistant and doesn't accept my soft nos, I'll make them harder and walk away, looking over my shoulder because he's got me kind of worried. Looks don't mat…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/18 04:42 PM
1

Lucky for her she doesn't speak English.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/18 12:20 AM
1

My oldest friend (I've know her since she was born) split up with her child's father a few days ago. To be honest I'm only surprised they made it this far; she's 21 and they were together 5 years (the kid turned 4 last month). Boy does time fly; I remember my mom gave me a safe sex and abortion talk when we found out. Her mom was NOT HAPPY. So yeah, my oldest friend is a single mother! Not just unmarried, but very single. Seems to be fine about it though. If I were her I'd be more horrified abou…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/18 10:22 PM
3

Yeah, I know your opinion already. Still not what the thread, or my comment, was about.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/18 05:11 PM
2

Having a ONS is not the same thing as trying very hard to date out of their league and being aware that that's what they're doing.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/18 04:18 PM
1

It's unlikely we've ever met. How's it going for you?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/18 10:53 PM
2

I don't.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/18 10:08 PM
3

I don't think I've ever met a person who actively and consciously tried to only date "out of their league."
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/18 07:54 PM
6

mainly physically, socially, mentally and financially, at least one or two of those factors. If he is above her in 2 of those factors, and she is above him in the other 2... why is she the one "dating up"? I definitely see plenty of attractive women dating men who are below their looks match. Not a majority, but they are visible because, well, it's the kind of thing you notice. I also see it the other way around.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/18 12:33 AM
1

I would be hurt and pissed and would lose attraction to him. And I'd be single.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/18 06:37 PM
2

My boyfriend bought me my (our) first vibrator for my birthday. I can no longer say on those sex doll threads that nope, I've actually never owned a vibrator. Not really getting what the hype is about to be honest. Fingers are nice.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/18 12:39 AM
3

As lower class probably, but not as dangerous. I'm a STEM student.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/18 08:20 PM
7

I live with guys covered in pretty tattoos. They're not gang tattoos. The dudes work in a café and study philosophy. No dangerous vibe coming from that photo.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/18 06:15 PM
2

Yeah, his eyes are really pretty.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/18 06:10 PM
2

I've never wanted to nor needed to, and it's not something I'd do just for fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/18 05:40 PM
1

All right, I take your point.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 08:49 PM
2

What's wrong with that? You can feel physical pleasure but no emotional connection, or an intense emotional connection but little to no physical pleasure, during sex. Or other combinations.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 08:18 PM
1

Thanks! I'll check it out when I get home.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 05:44 PM
5

Why assume that engaging in that behavior affects arousal, instead of assuming that low arousability leads a woman to be sexually submissive? Is that clearer?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 05:30 PM
6

I'm not really seeing how that would help me.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 04:50 PM
4

I don't understand why it's not presented the other way around. Also curious as to what they defined as submissive behavior. Interested in reading the study. How about women who don't get aroused easily are unlikely to take the dominant role because why would they? Or, women who are unable to express their desires engage in submissive sexual behavior? (Edit: since it's that or no sex, if they can't take charge...)
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 04:49 PM
5

In other words, professional accomplishments are greatly incentivized by our desire to impress females. This is something women can understand on a rational level, but it would be extremely helpful for them to understand it also on a personal/physical level. Helpful how? How exactly would "understanding this on a physical level" improve my life as a woman, or help me in any way? Or did you mean helpful for men? Sure, any group would benefit from receiving more empathy. Could go both ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 04:26 PM
4

I googled "sexy outfit" and a lot of things I would never wear showed up. I don't dress particularly "sexy" or revealing, and would argue that most women don't -- but I do regularly dress to look attractive. Why wear clothes that are made for the purpose of men finding you attractive if you hate that attention? Being attractive gets you preferential treatment (and not just from guys) as well as the negative treatment you mentioned (catcalling, etc). It feels awesome when someone tells me I'm "be…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 03:09 PM
2

You love my "snark" (read: valid question) so much you're unwilling to answer. If you were arguing in good faith, I'd believe you may find this somewhat interesting. Happy reading and please, do go on thinking your logic is hilariously superior.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 12:55 PM
1

Seems like the opinion offered is "I would take the test."
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 12:48 PM
4

All right, what's the reason to believe it's not a good sample? The fact that you disagree with the results? You could also say the less attractive a woman is the less likely she is to be able to attract a high-value mate for commitment, but it's easy for her to have sex with attractive men, so perhaps she'll go for that. Assumptions and guessing, look at me doing it too. Attractive women have no problem attracting the guy they want to commit to them. High partner counts are gotten through STRs …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 09:42 AM
4

There's no reason to believe the sample is unrepresentative though. Large enough sample size for statistics at least. Also, what, do you think unattractive women sleep around less? Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/18 09:25 AM
2

1) Blue pill, woman, unmarried 2) I don't have a "purpose" in life. I get out of bed out of habit, but I enjoy my life. My overarching goal is to be happy and do my best to be a good person. 3) Sure. I'm usually pretty cheerful when I wake up. I do things that are fun for me and make me happy, like most people, and I volunteer on-and-off as a way of "giving back" (read: feeling good about myself) when I have the opportunity to. 4) Making my parents happy and making sure they never lack for anyth…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 11:10 PM
5

They know; most either don't believe it or don't care because it ruins their fun. Would be such a pain to find something else to complain about.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 10:57 PM
7

That's pretty much a no. You were always going to be into those "gorgeous" women; I don't think your experience has much to do with ability to pair bond being linked to # (or quality) of past partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 08:22 PM
3

I love him more deeply and maturely because I'm older and we've shared much much more together than I've ever shared with another partner, but I think that's a function of age and our commitment and the amount of time we've spent together, more than me simply "loving him more." That's why it's very hard for me to understand these people (like the twitter guys from OP) saying they loved that person they dated for 10 months (and who may have ripped their heart out) more than the person they marrie…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 08:03 PM
7

now in my later 20’s all I get is the opportunity to date overweight women with children from another man and loads of emotional baggage. I will never be able to appreciate these women because i had better women in the past. You think you would be attracted to and appreciative of these women if you hadn't dated all the others?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 07:38 PM
2

If anyone is hung up on someone in that book, it's Darcy.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 06:49 PM
3

Hm, if that's what you think then I'll just have to strongly disagree. It is made pretty clear when her feelings start to change. When she realizes he likes her, she harshly and honestly rejects him. When she realizes he's not an asshole (Wickham explanation), he saves her family's reputation (Lydia's wedding), and he takes her criticism of him to heart and changes his actions (taking pains to be agreeable to her and the Gardiners in his own home), she falls for him.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 04:44 PM
2

Does anyone else have a strategy other than the RP that's worked for them? Most people do, but they don't call it a strategy.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 03:59 PM
1

So the fact that she's in love with him for a little while before they marry?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 03:49 PM
2

Thank you hyperrreal and cuittler for not letting this sub burn to the ground! Welcome William_Howe! All right since that's out of the way, I think personal advice posts here could actually be interesting. I like the idea of seeing how blues and reds tailor their advice to specific situations. But I'm a bit wary of all those posts being by incels (since that's allowed now) -- that could get old pretty fast.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 01:56 PM
8

How is Darcy an example? Lizzie rejects Collins' proposal before she even likes Darcy, and only because she doesn't like the other guy. She is then interested in Wickham until he reveals his true colors. She rejects Darcy before she falls in love with him and eventually marries him. Which part is the alpha widowing?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 01:36 PM
7

Well, you have the right of it and said it pretty well this time at least.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 12:09 PM
21

You should comment more.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 11:51 AM
6

Funny, I would have flipped the genders.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 11:43 AM
7

Really like this one. I've seen college guys fall hard for a "crazy" girl several times and romanticize the whole thing. Hell, I've been guilty of it myself, though once was enough. I know it can feel more intense with highs and lows and lack of stability, but that doesn't mean it's more love, and I would never look back on a relationship with someone who "broke" me as my greatest love. I feel a bit sorry for this guy's partner. I also think it's a rather immature view of love.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 08:47 AM
3

What "blue theories" (?) have you been reading that to you sounded incompatible with your OP? Work, rules, mantras are not an exhausting part of my romantic life.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/18 01:47 AM
2

Teasing is normal. I tease my friends all the time and they tease right back. My boyfriend and I tease the hell out of each other. It's fun and shows you can laugh and take a joke and are clever enough to come up with on-point comments. Sure, I like being teased by a guy -- but the best teasing is not one-sided, and then it's not about dominance.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/18 11:50 AM
6

That's priceless.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 04:27 PM
1

Mine too, believe me!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 10:30 AM
3

Every now and then I get a really sweet PM from a user I've never seen post and it reminds me why I love reddit and how humanity is all rainbows and fluffiness.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/18 05:20 AM
2

I would think you were weird if you whispered to reddit! I won't miss it too much since he is a redditor so he will probably tell me about threads he reads. Just not from PPD because he thinks we're a bunch of weirdos.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 08:57 PM
1

I did know that in general women prefer 6'0" to 5'5", but I'm surprised 99th percentile is still considered that attractive. To me it's almost freakishly tall territory -- not in an unattractive way, but in the sense that it's likely the only thing I will notice about him is that he's super tall. I guess I've not been attracted to one in part because I've barely met any.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 08:52 PM
2

You whisper to reddit?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 08:46 PM
5

Now we know that girls will categorize you either as an alpha lover or a beta provider. Do we now.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 06:32 PM
2

This time next week my boyfriend will be visiting so I will be pretending I don't spend quite as much time on reddit as I actually do. I'm sure I'll miss out on a lot of quality threads.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 06:20 PM
4

Fascinating.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 05:19 PM
5

Among the general population... it's tall.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 05:18 PM
2

It's really tall. Not only does it seem really tall to me when I look up at a 6'4" guy, but the internet tells me it's 99th percentile even for you in the US. CDC says 188cm (which I also perceive as really tall) is already 95th percentile.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 05:12 PM
3

So 6'4" is 193 cm. Is that really what most people see as ideal? I can't remember the last time I saw a guy that tall, but I doubt I thought he was super hot. That's why "what women want" is such a debate -- simply because they don't know it themselves. Ah, yes. But men know better.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 03:53 PM
1

I think it may be. It has happened to me (not US), but very rarely. Kind of like catcalling happens to me in different amounts depending on where I am.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 03:22 PM
1

If they want to have a ton of casual sex and that's what makes them happy, it's not going to negatively affect them. If they want a relationship, then it's probably not going to negatively affect them, but it's not really doing them any favors either. At worst there's a strong possibility it will affect their ability to pair-bond (if they had any to begin with), and a smaller possibility that they'll get some sort of annoying STD and that women will be wary of them because they are seen as playe…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/18 01:26 PM
1

Haha, sorry that someone had to doubt your math either way.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 04:57 PM
4

And her risk of catching it is 50%, and her risk of passing it on is 10%. If he only has sex with the infected EPC twice, he's only got a risk of catching it of 20%. She's got a 100% risk. I get your final point, which is accurate, but I just felt the need to say that's not how the math works. If you flip a coin twice, you do not, actually, have a 100% chance of getting heads at least once.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 04:42 PM
9

Cheating is shitty and damaging to a relationship regardless of gender. Of course it's ridiculous to call an unfaithful husband "loyal." Finding out you've been investing, financially and emotionally, in a relationship where the other has been unfaithful really sucks. And yes, finding out that he's been raising, and financially and emotionally investing in a kid that isn't biologically his sucks even more than her finding out he fucked Stacy last week. But finding out he has a mistress and a kid…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 03:13 PM
1

Or course. There doesn't have to be a loser in these situations.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 10:50 AM
1

What in earth is uncontrollable lust?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 10:08 AM
2

I stay away from the guys who only want sex because we don't want the same thing. I wasn't thinking about status, but if you two want different things why bother? You seem angry.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/18 03:12 AM
2

She likes cats more than she likes the idea of dating that guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 09:39 PM
5

Again, she wasn't trying to make him look like a "second-prize winner-loser." She was just saying she wouldn't want to date him. Why would she, or any woman, care how much "value" other random men she's never met assign to that? She doesn't care about giving a guy a "reward," she just wanted to fuck him but not date him.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 06:57 PM
5

they expect outcomes skewed in their favor I expect her to have changed her mind People like it when things go their way, that's hardly surprising and has nothing to do with covert or overt communication. She probably just likes attention. You're not getting anything out of it. Fine. Why is it a big deal? I have been invited to hang out with dudes who wanted sex or a relationship when I made it clear I only wanted friendship. I don't see how in either of those situations (yours or mine), the oth…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 06:16 PM
1

Nope, I didn't. I was typing an answer but then got busy with stuff online. It'll be up soon.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 06:03 PM
11

You're nuts if you think she sees it as "punishing" or "rewarding." That is not how normal people think. She fucked someone she was sexually attracted to but not interested in dating. She's in a relationship with, and still fucking, someone she's sexually attracted to and interested in dating. That's it. That's what I was saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 06:01 PM
11

When my former roommate described her hookups, it was hardly with stars in her eyes. The one that stuck out to me was Mr. "He's hot, but dull as a brick." She would rather fuck than listen to him talk. Would she have LTR'd that guy? Hell no. Was she disappointed when her hookups didn't turn into anything more? Probably a couple times -- but a lot of them were guys she wouldn't want to date anyway. She's currently dating a guy she did initially hook up with (because, surprise! She was attracted t…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 03:44 PM
5

What on earth does this story have to do with what you quoted from my comment? What I was saying is that when a guy can't take a "covert" no, you have to make it more overt. Some guys don't get it until it's really overt and basically what the girl perceives as rude and bitchy, but she had to do it so he would take it as a no. So, what’s the deal with her?? I would say the deal is she doesn't want to fuck you, and you're putting way too much thought into it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 03:31 PM
8

I agree with most of it. When I blow hot and cold on a guy it's because he's done or said something that has made me doubt our compatibility, so during the cold time I'm reevaluating how much I prefer him to being single, then hot comes back when I decide. However I find it amusing that he calls it "dysfunctional" and then says we're crazy... a calculated crazy. “Silly boy, you’ll never understand women, just give up” is exactly the M.O. Once you accept this, she’s earned a lifetime of get-out-o…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 11:22 AM
4

We don't live together. We're long distance and visit each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 11:10 AM
2

I kill or remove the scary bugs and he's little spoon. But more seriously, no. I can't think of such a situation, mainly because I can't think of that many masculine jobs that show up in our lives, since we don't share a living space for more than a few weeks at a time.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/18 10:49 AM
2

So can you honestly say that the majority of attractive women in their twenties would not jump into bed if Leonardo DiCaprio wanted to hook up with them? If that was what you were getting at, you could have said so in your OP. Of course it's easy for DiCaprio to get laid. Instead, you focused on women's "anger" at DiCaprio. I don't actually think the majority of women in their 20s (why is it relevant to say attractive? Do you think the unattractive one will be more reluctant?) would hook up with…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 10:24 PM
2

What tenant of TRP is proven by this? That men like hot young women? You don't say. That women think much older men dating women barely out of their teens is gross? You don't say. That celebrities get laid? You don't say. Notice that the only people angry at this tend to be older women How do you know this? I mean, where do they state that they are all older women? I'm 21, I think it's gross as hell -- the only difference is I don't follow celebrity relationships or comment on DailyMail articles…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 10:14 PM
3

It's not something I think about when looking at guys, but thinking about it now I'd say a masculine guy is aggressive, competitive, confident, assertive, and protective (of what he sees as "his"). Physically, scent matters a lot. I would say broad shoulders, height (enhanced sexual dimorphism = masculine?) do too, more so than facial features (large jaw, wide face in general, thin lips). Also, does he need to be masculine for you to be attracted to him? Physically, no. I can be attracted to a m…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/18 07:22 PM
1

Firstly, if deviant means deviating from the norm, it's definitely deviant. Secondly, you're arguing against something I hadn''t said until now. Literally the only thing I've said until now was I can't imagine my boyfriend having one, and having a sex doll is not normal. I stand by that. You seem to want to talk about deviants and me wanting to control my boyfriend's money; that's fine, but it's obvious you have no desire for an actual exchange when you talk about things that have no relation to…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 10:32 PM
1

However, if they do, there is a term that describes your boyfriend's money: not your property. Indeed. I don't believe I said it was anywhere. But he's pretty budget-conscious, and has never spent "several thousand dollars" on anything in his life, though he technically could. So it strikes me as very unlike him. (Again, even aside from the ick factor.) What I did say was it's weird, which it is, and which is part of the reason why it's hard for me to imagine my reaction. Owning a sex doll, at a…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 10:23 PM
3

Yes, because he's about as likely to as he is to have an expensive sex doll. The doll inspires feelings of disgust the ring does not, obviously. But I was referring to being unable to imagine my reaction because the hypothetical idea does not fit the man I know at all... and also because it's very out-there. Not many normal guys have multi-thousand dollar sex dolls.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 10:06 PM
3

I pretty much agree. Attraction (even sexual attraction) is not the same thing as arousal for me. I can get aroused from touching myself while thinking about homework. I often experience attraction without feeling aroused by it, since the former can be triggered just by watching my boyfriend but the latter usually requires some interaction. Sometimes, I experience this when I see him with a baby or a small animal. Yep! I love that.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 06:41 PM
8

Yes, this fits my experience as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 06:36 PM
8

Learning about either of those secrets would severely detract from my attraction to him. After only 5 months, I imagine I'd cut my losses. If my SO (of 2 years) came clean now about the sex worker thing, I think I would break up with him. Sex workers once a month for months, maybe years on end is a pretty big thing to have lied about to me. The idea of him having a multi-thousand dollar sex doll is just so hard to wrap my head around I'm not sure what I would do.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/18 10:42 AM
5

I will at least agree that the claim the best or most passionate sex a woman had was with that ONS when she was 20 is bullshit.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/18 04:00 PM
6

Is it that much easier to have casual sex with lower SMV women? Do you think if all men lowered their standards for casual sex, there wouldn't still be an oversupply of men on the SMP? I tend to assume the difference is at least in part due to slightly less interest in casual sex from women, not to men's high standards. As a group, men have virtually zero standards for casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/18 02:46 PM
10

CMV If you do not want a LTR, you are better off not getting into a LTR. Also, my family is from Champagne and even we don't drink 3 glasses at 9 AM.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/18 01:13 PM
3

What genre(s) do you write?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/18 10:43 AM
2

If the sex wasn't too graphic (or if it was simulated like you get in most movies), I'm sure it could work for me in the sense that it could arouse me. I mean, just give me Dirty Dancing and I'm there already. But I don't know if I'd get off watching movie itself; I'd probably masturbate later to a fantasy of the characters in another situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/18 08:30 PM
2

It's both. The characters, because I feel like I "know" them in a sense, so I feel less distant and more interested in their sex life. Whereas with porn I'm watching random people, whom I know nothing about and therefore have zero sexual interest in, boning. I also feel that way reading short non-fanfiction erotica, but longer erotic stories or fanfiction where I'm familiar with the characters work for me. It's also the medium. I prefer reading, because I can picture things in a way that excites…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/18 01:52 PM
2

1) No. 2) Mostly reactive. 3) It's more active just before, during, and just after my period. I've never tried hormonal BC. 4) No. Once every few months I start (and rarely finish) a video, just to remember why it doesn't do it for me. I prefer my imagination, or porny fanfiction. 5) Not enough. A heated glance, a long kiss, roaming hands, being told I'm sexy and he really wants me right now... Those work just fine and it's never been a problem for me. Sometimes we start and I'm not there yet, n…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/18 01:34 PM
5

I've never talked offline about sex toys with anyone who wasn't a SO -- and apart from that, the only time I've heard sex toys brought up in conversation, it was men making jokes about dildos.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 07:24 PM
5

Is this about sex dolls?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 06:59 PM
13

If you can find what you're looking for, and have them be interested in you back, it doesn't matter. If you're not having any success, if you feel like no one is good enough, or if everyone you pursue rejects you, you're probably being "too picky". But if you'd rather be single than with someone who doesn't meet all your criteria, that's fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 06:47 PM
2

It's pretty fleshed out in the OP already, isn't it? If you have a specific question I can try to answer. I can't say I 100% know what Atlas was saying, and I doubt most women function exactly like me. But I at least nodded my head yes at what she wrote. I don't get whatever the female version of a hard-on is when I see a hot person. I just think, "Hey, they're hot," but it doesn't involve sexual thoughts, thoughts of seeing them naked, or arousal. they are attracted to a male's Persona and then…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 06:08 PM
1

Maybe at first, but it's kind of hard to say now, isn't it? We've only spent days, weeks, at most a month at a time together. During visits to each other we don't even so much as flirt with anyone else, for obvious reasons (that's not why we came!). We don't really know what being close is like. If it turns out we like seeing each other every day when we can, it's going to be hard to find time to hook up with others. Longer-term though, no, it will eventually be closed.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 05:42 PM
1

I'm 21, so marriage is not in my immediate plans, but we've talked about marriage and kids, yes. Certainly no definite plans before we've actually lived in the same country for a while, but we intend to close the distance. I wouldn't call it casual since he has made pretty much every job-related decision he's made in the past 2.5 years (since before we even got together) considering us as a thing -- only taking offers that would bring him closer to me or allow him the flexibility and money to vi…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 05:10 PM
1

I do see it as different from a friend though. Our friends and family have seen us interact, know the effort, time, and money we put into seeing each other, know the sacrifices and choices we have made to make it possible, know how sad we get when we are apart and how silly we act when we are together. And my friends and family tend not to give unsolicited advice if they don't see me being unhappy... which they don't. This person read one of my reddit comments, so no, I'm not really going to tak…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 05:05 PM
1

I don't think so. My last relationship was zero-distance, but we weren't monogamous either. There are other factors.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 04:59 PM
2

Isn't it true that the rich man is not giving you any more (perhaps less) than an average man would on a night out in terms of % of wealth or % of income (so symbolically it shouldn't mean more, even though in objective terms it's a lot more)? I appreciate the thought and effort that goes into gifts of lower financial value. One of the most touching gifts I've received from a SO cost pennies -- a painting she'd made about us. Another must have cost around $25 dollars -- it wasn't about the money…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 04:57 PM
1

Not the label, but the openness itself is certainly at least in part justified by the distance in our case.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 04:51 PM
3

I don't judge strangers for having sex. I don't care about strangers having sex. I think it's about as respectable as having dinner or taking a shit; I've never stopped to think about it in those terms, and the idea that there's anything particularly respectable (or shameful) about it is weird to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 02:23 PM
3

Different perspective I guess. I'd never see someone, man or woman, having casual sex as anything "respectable." It's not just about the "qualities" required, just that I don't think it's a respectable activity in itself, and I never will.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 07:52 AM
2

1) Fits my experience and describes my sexuality pretty accurately. 2) I have no idea. Apparently, not completely repulsive to everyone. 3) Not attractive. 4) Sex in a fancy hotel suite is nice. Even when I'm the one paying for the suite. No experience getting pampered by rich men, but I imagine there are worse feelings
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 07:42 AM
3

Only 20% bullshit hatred, why, they must have improved since the last time I had a look.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 02:39 AM
7

Does this matter, since TRP isn't talking to women? Don't get me wrong; I like neither the message nor the tone. But they don't give a fuck what I like.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 02:21 AM
4

Fair enough! Seeing it as respectable is just alien to me. But yeah, good point.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/18 12:41 AM
10

Are you claiming it doesn't count because the women aren't desirable to you, or are you saying it doesn't count because those women have lower standards/are more open to casual sex? I think casual sex counts as casual sex. 1) Not to me, but who thinks hooking up, regardless of the other person's weight, is a "respectable achievement" anyway? 2) Do the hot, fit, athletic women shoot the first guy down? Then probably not. Still, there aren't that many woman who will have casual sex with just anyon…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 11:19 PM
2

Thanks, that makes a bit more sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 10:17 PM
7

Hm, I haven't noticed many people here saying they chose to be attracted to whatever they're attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 09:59 PM
3

Also, I think that's the best description I've ever heard of my very poly friends, lol. Similarly open, very sociosexual, and at the very least value many things over sex. Makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 07:48 PM
12

I'm sure you know best.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 07:47 PM
9

We're in a LDR, see each other rarely, yet I'm still his most frequent sex partner so... I suppose if you want to call a steady long-distance girlfriend and the occasional hook up a harem, you can.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 07:35 PM
8

Nah, even that case is likely to lead to resentment and jealousy and disaster. Poly and open relationships just aren't for a loooot of people. I'm not talking about "raw deal for the man" here, just that it can put a lot of stress on a relationship. Even those who think they can handle it in the case you describe... often realize they can't. Most likely to succeed are equally open partners, both with high, unrestricted sociosexuality, neither of whom sees sex as a big deal. Still, I would never …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 07:34 PM
19

I'm in an open relationship but don't actually desire casual sex. My boyfriend has gotten laid outside the relationship, and I haven't, because I don't want to. I've flirted and kissed and I find that fun, so I do enjoy the freedom (though not so much in the past year since I lean monogamous and have lost interest in even that), but have no drive to seek sex outside the relationship even though I can (and he's not stopping me from doing it). We do not fall under 2). I'm young and relatively attr…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 05:48 PM
6

Essentially, it almost seems like she’s advocating the blue pill position of “be yourself”, but mostly because it allows the right people for you to actually find and connect with you. Why the "but"? This is the "be yourself" position at its core. It's the usual argument in favor of "being yourself." I wouldn't want to be with someone who doesn't actually like me. I'm myself, and being someone else sounds exhausting. One reason some red pillers disagree with "be yourself" is because they think "…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 02:56 PM
1

Yeah, I'm not in the US and the guys I have classes with are like that. A recently varied group with some nerds, some hard partiers, lots of fairly normal guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/18 11:38 AM
8

You don't have a flashing sign above your head stating: "27-year-old virgin redditor." Women you meet don't know you're a virgin. There's a difference between being a virgin because no woman is interested in you, and no women being interested in you because you're a virgin. Every guy was a virgin at somepoint, so there's definitely another reason you're still a virgin; and I don't mean you're a horrible loser, but perhaps social awkwardness, lack of physical attractiveness, or just not spending …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 10:20 PM
3

The statement itself comes off as criticism of "spineless wimps," since those are the two most negative words in that sentence. I wouldn't call it "offensive," just a false dichotomy. this thought process that women generally are attracted to bad boys/alphas and lie about being into soft nice guys Now you've added in the lying, and you've changed "spineless wimps" to "nice guys," so your statement has changed. I think most women are not going to react well to "Women generally lie," and I don't s…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 09:32 PM
7

I think we'd all die.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 04:32 PM
7

And not even just in relationships. Happened to me in budding friendships too. My SO talks to me about his problems. So do my friends, male and female. I've been extremely attracted to male and female friends who were open about their feelings (although not necessarily because they were; however it can be an incredibly bonding experience). But it's just weird and overwhelming to have someone, especially someone you're still getting to know, dump aaaall their negative feelings onto you at once. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 03:32 PM
5

They're outliers, you know.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 03:03 PM
2

Perhaps that was too short of a TLDR for you. I stated towards the end that lack of sexual attention could affect people's loneliness. That said, yeah, I agree with your point.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 02:04 PM
10

Feeling lonely is not the same as being alone. Loneliness is not necessarily the same as social isolation. Loneliness can be feeling like you don't have meaningful connections. I don't make friends easily, but I have a few, and I am rarely lonely. Plenty of people have a group of "friends" but still feel lonely, maybe misunderstood. My SO has friends to talk to, people to hang out with, and goes out semi-regularly -- but there is a gap between how often he would like to go out and how often he a…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 01:22 PM
32

I find it strange that you equate loneliness with lacking male attention, as if that were the only form it takes.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 12:23 PM
28

How female loneliness differs from male loneliness? I believe that men and women are capable of experiencing the same breadth and intensity of feelings of loneliness, but that societal norms mean one gender is more likely to experience a certain type of loneliness. A man who likes to talk about his feelings with his friends is going to find it harder to find someone to talk to than a woman. I (like, I'm sure, many women) have had men pour out all their feelings (and I don't mean only romantic fe…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 12:09 PM
6

People will do what they want. Put enough deterrents in place and when they re-evaluate, more of them will decide they want something else (social standing, marriage, not going to prison, not going to hell) more than they want pre-marital sex. That's still agency, and still their decision. People these days just don't believe pre-marital sex is wrong, so they don't believe you should put stronger deterrents in place. And without those deterrents they're right, people will just have sex outside o…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/18 11:43 AM
2

Woohoo! I hope you enjoy settling in. Good luck getting a place!
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/18 07:27 PM
5

Just because an attractive guy can have sex with multiple women doesn't mean he is attractive because he has sex with multiple women. For many women monogamy is not optional.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/18 08:38 PM
2

I don't even remember how I ended up discovering this... And it's not like it was that long ago either. I guess spending enough time on reddit leads you to it eventually.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/18 02:49 PM
4

Thanks for linking to that thread; I don't think I'd seen it before and I found it one of the more interesting ones I've read here -- and not just your OP; the comments were worth a look at too.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/18 12:56 PM
3

As she says in the vid, "I can feel it in my uterus." In another comment you claimed to be interested in anatomy, didn't you? Quoting this sentence is even more laughable than linking to the video in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 11:46 PM
3

You mean some people watched The L Word for something else than girl-on-girl action? More seriously though, I agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 11:33 PM
3

Nah, porn says you're wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 11:21 PM
3

I mean, I came in fully expecting a rehash of How much do looks matter? I'm not complaining I guess. I had a laugh, but I think I'll go back to watching Mansfield Park now.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 11:20 PM
2

bring unbridled joy/happiness to beautiful people of the opposite sex and turn them into a kid in a candy-store or a kid at Christmastime just by virtue of your physical traits. Fantasies of sexual power, being a 10/10 stud, getting girls to giggle/blush and jump on your dick Not the same way of thinking. she is transported to another dimension and more or less has a seizure of pleasure while babbling incoherent nonsense while her brain has a meltdown. I'll take your word for it, stud.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 11:16 PM
2

Yeah, but in a funny way at some points, no? There's literally a link to porn to support his argument (if we can call it that).
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 11:14 PM
3

It should be obvious what the point is The sentences made sense, technically. The way of thinking is so completely alien to me it prompted that what. I linked to the video in the OP. Sorry mate, I draw the line at watching porn for the satisfaction of other PPD posters.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 11:12 PM
3

Everything I quoted. That's why I quoted it.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 11:10 PM
5

It makes you sad to see the gap between yourself and the ideal in every physical trait from head to toe, as well as in viriility and sexual energy itself (some men on /r/massivecock ejaculate BUCKETS, and it comes out with such force that it practically hits the ceiling). My idea (perhaps wrong) is that these "physical trait" subreddits make you sad because (1) you wish you had that physical trait (and the attendant sexual power) that allows you to accrue pleasure for yourself and incredible exp…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 11:00 PM
9

And by "you" you mean "me." You should probably stop and think for a minute why you're so familiar with that big dick sub. bring unbridled joy/happiness to beautiful people of the opposite sex and turn them into a kid in a candy-store or a kid at Christmastime just by virtue of your physical traits. (Creepiest metaphors ever, but I was trying to evoke images of unbridled joy/delight.) what There's also porn where the woman is with a massive cock and she literally has a seizure of pleasure and sa…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 10:52 PM
9

You get applause and approval by society today for having the 'courage' to admit you're homosexual, or bisexual, or living as a transgendered person, or being a woman to openly expresses her sexual desire. By some parts of society. And only because it does require courage, because you don't know who will turn out to be a bigot -- or sometimes, because you do know. When my then best friend came out to me in high school, he asked me to keep it a secret. There were rumors about his sexuality, and p…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 08:47 PM
1

Friendship circles, class, and social situations mostly. Exactly the same places I meet potential friends actually. is this a surprise? Looots of people date this way. Some also use online dating. I met my first SO in class, the second in a uni group, the third in class, and my boyfriend at the Welcome Party on a short study abroad program. I've been approached in the street or at the grocery store but I never saw any of them as "potential partners." In social situations people are super approac…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 11:04 AM
3

Set up at a party by other people? No. Facebook friended and started hanging out after meeting at a social gathering, yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/18 12:10 AM
4

I definitely agree that "the wrong guy always approaches me" because the wrong guys are more likely to cold approach, and to cold approach many women. I don't want more cold approaches for that reason -- I have never experienced a pleasant one --, but I see his point, especially about the "If he doesn't have the balls to come up to me, I don't want him anyway" attitude. I've always experienced the opposite: if a guy does have the "balls" to cold approach me, I probably don't want him. it’s still…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/18 10:35 PM
1

My past contains none of those red flags, unless we count the time I fell for someone else while in a relationship as infidelity. Which wouldn't really be unfair, since I knew it was happening and did it anyway. All of my answers are theoretical, since I've never been put in that position before (dating someone who threw up these flags). drug or alcohol abuse If in distant past and they're "clean" now, maybe. Current drug abuse and they're only a potential partner, no; it's a very powerful turn-…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/18 05:10 PM
5

I mean you probably wanted to say that yes, it matters and at the same time your own past shouldn't matter No, actually, I was slightly interested in participating in a thread about "Does a partner's sexual past matter?" and ended up in a thread about how sex is the only thing of value women have to offer, and that's why they lie about their past. I care about my partner's sexual past. He doesn't, AFAIK, care as much about mine, but he's aware of it anyway. Everyone I've dated has been. I think …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 02:03 PM
5

Does partner's sexual past matter? Well, I -- So let's get it straight for once. Does a woman's past matter or not? Oh, right.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/18 01:22 PM
2

That's a really nice way of putting it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 07:57 PM
2

That's adorable, I had no idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 07:26 PM
2

This is a super sweet story. I'm loving this thread. My husband is the first man I've ever seen and immediately thought, "I have to talk to this guy." I made this really convoluted (and foiled) plan to sit next to him in class to try to, I dunno, ask for a pen or something This is exactly what happened with my ex. Except I succeeded. First day of my second year of college, I made a resolution to learn 2 new names of classmates each day (I'm terrible at remembering names). During roll call her na…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 07:25 PM
2

Yes, definitely, but the plan is not fixed yet. He doesn't speak the language of my native country so it'd be hard for him to find a job, so until I graduate (2019) it isn't really a possibility. The good news is we both like moving around and neither of us is attached to a specific place; it will only be about job opportunities for both of us. In the meantime my solution has been to spend a year abroad even further away. (I wish I were joking, but uh, in my defense it is a once-in-a-lifetime op…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 06:03 PM
2

I'll share because I feel like it, but it's hardly an example of a recommended sexual strategy. We met on a two-week study abroad trip. Picture a bunch of college students thrown together in a dorm building in a foreign country for that long. Getting drunk and partying in the evenings, and going to classes and workshops during the day. I have never had so much alcohol in the space of two weeks as that summer, and when it ended my now-boyfriend swore off alcohol for a couple months. Both of us we…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/18 04:57 PM
5

Artpop was taking about casual sex. Thinking that having an anorgasmic quickie with some guy you're not in a relationship with is unsatisfying wouldn't hinder a woman's prospects for "a good relationship." Starfishing during sex in a relationship, or being in a dead bedroom relationship? Then yes, I see your point. In a good relationship the sexual and emotional needs of both partners are met.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/18 08:29 PM
1

My boyfriend and I have tried twice, both times at his initiative. It was boring and difficult and I hated it. And he didn't exactly get much out of it either. In a casual situation I imagine I'd just skip the blowjob.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/18 08:19 PM
2

I still call making out with someone hooking up. A leftover from high school, I suppose.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/18 08:16 PM
1

18-19, and yes they did, like I did. Edit: How else would I know?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/18 11:24 AM
5

At my age, in college, I have no trouble meeting men I find more than "somewhat" attractive who are not in double digits. So to answer, 1-5. To be honest I've forgotten my boyfriend's exact count, but from the anecdotes he shared he's either in the high end of that range or just slightly above. And yes, I am incredibly attracted to him. Much higher, I'd consider a yellow flag, as well as just finding it a turn-off, though I don't think it's an outright dealbreaker (I've never had to think about …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/18 02:13 AM
1

Perfect illustration of my point, isn't it? Red lens.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/18 03:54 PM
1

I've been on PPD for a little while... I can't say the predominant attitude among the women here who have something against TRP is "TRP is making men attractive but I only want naturally attractive guys, therefore I dislike TRP."
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/18 03:41 PM
1

Women hate it when men don't do these things naturally so of course they generally hate The Red Pill It's ridiculous to pretend this is a major reason why women dislike TRP. I'd like the blue pill to be right, but I'm not holding out hope for it And if you keep applying RP concepts to your life, you shouldn't have too much hope. BP success stories will not come to slap you in the face when you're viewing the world through a red lens.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/18 09:57 AM
9

I mean, that has personally been my experience, but I don't think many women would call a session that didn't involve at least one orgasm for them "great." Why do you think that's because of "media" instead of orgasms feeling nice?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/18 12:18 AM
3

I suppose I like this better than the assumption that the best sex a woman has is with that hot guy she had a ONS with, and her LTR can never compare. Now we're saying sex with that hot guy sucked because she isn't hot enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/18 11:19 PM
1

8 since August, but I'm usually a 7. I don't really have much to complain about, to be honest. Female, 21, in a long-distance relationship, blue.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/18 10:39 PM
3

You didn't ask me, but -- I've been in a LDR for more than two years and I just live my life as usual when we're apart. I don't hook up all the time when single, so it doesn't change much in my day-to-day life, except now I have someone I miss (and chat to all day every day), and visits to look forward to.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/18 10:30 AM
3

I am 20-something and have never had sex 2-5 times a week for more than 3 consecutive weeks. I would currently be among the 93% in that survey; by all means go ahead and play the world's tiniest violin for me, boo hoo. I'm not surprised, nor do I think it's a bad thing, that very few single people on Match.com have sex 2-5 times a week. I certainly never have when I'm single (and not on Match.com), and I don't think I know many people who put in the effort to get laid that frequently when not in…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/18 06:10 AM
1

No, I do not.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/18 09:38 AM
2

She.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/18 08:41 PM
3

I first had PIV at 20, but was 17 when I became sexually active (at which point I personally ceased to consider myself a "virgin," not that that was a word I ever attached any importance to). I was neither the first nor the last of my peer group, so not a ridiculous outlier, but yes, it was a bit later than many of my peers. I wouldn't say I pursued it, but I had sex when I wanted to. I didn't wait. I didn't walk around talking about having had sex or not, and no one ever cared. I have exaggerat…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/18 04:08 PM
2

Oh, my boyfriend is coming in April. I agree, so far away! But he'll be with me for my birthday.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/18 08:12 PM
2

Fewer.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/18 02:54 AM
3

Ha, I was wondering how long it would take for this to show up here.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/18 02:38 PM
2

Most people probably experience "temporary celibacy" during that period, in the form of... not being sexually active yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 08:39 PM
6

Love ain't a thing Love is a verb So you've got to show me, show me, show me
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 08:27 PM
7

Yeah, I really liked that sentence.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 08:17 PM
8

This is ridiculous. Why are half your questions about "women" when this is, like, 4 people? Do you think most women are trying to be sugar babies? Since when does sex-positive means never being "grossed out" by a man making sex eyes at you?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 05:39 PM
4

So some dude struggling with women has to go digging through the 5 subreddits you list in order to get all that "common sense" advice, with no context for what works and what doesn't? I don't care. He can go digging through TRP for all I care. I'm just saying he will find a much higher percentage of accurate, efficient advice on r/fitness, and much less utter bullshit. This thread is about the "good" parts of TRP. The reason not to go to TRP to get the good stuff all in one place is that there t…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 02:10 PM
6

show me some codified sources no 'oh anyone with a brain could work this out' Do you know what "common sense" means? These are not "codified" (lol) because most people don't need such an extensive list of rules and principles to interact with human beings. They are taught respect and manners and those are their basic rules to follow as they learn how to interact with other people. Did you knowingly follow "codified sources" beyond the societal norms of, like, saying "Hello," when you met your fr…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/18 01:42 PM
6

One difference being you probably haven't exactly worked to build a trusting relationship with the specific cops testing you. Another being that they're doing their job.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 11:51 PM
2

1) Very insulted. It's one thing if he tells me early on that he'd always request a paternity test for kids (already meh, but something I can understand) and we agree, and another to greet the announcement of a pregnancy with "Okay, but just in case you cheated, I want a test." For the record, I've asked my boyfriend if he would require a paternity test. He made a face and said no, he didn't believe I'd do that to him. 2) It would damage it. Again, I'd feel like he was insulting me -- not to men…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/18 02:26 AM
1

I'm a bit baffled by people saying they're safe if your face isn't in them. I never put my face on that blog I had in middle school. I've never put my face on reddit. And yet I don't go around thinking that I'm free to say anything and it's 100% safe and will never, ever be traced back to me. Lots of people don't do nudes. Look at the top comment. My reasons (I won't speak for my boyfriend) are pretty much identical. The way to keep nudes as "safe" as possible is for them never to exist in the f…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/18 11:59 AM
1

My boyfriend actually sent me a picture of that graph last week, so I could have. It slipped my mind.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 09:16 PM
5

I hear (that they believe) she, like all women: will be slutty for the right man or men will leave a man if a better option for her comes along is hypergamous and will only date men she see as superior to herself will cheat with the right man is emotional and immature is solipsistic is hardwired this way even if she does not fit one or two aspects of AWALT, she is AWALT. She probably does have those traits, but to a lesser degree than most women, and is able to suppress their expression. if she …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/18 09:06 PM
9

Aside from maybe talking about celebrity crushes ("I'd do Chris Whatshisface any day"), I find that a really weird and tasteless thing to say if you're in a serious relationship. Okay, never mind, I guess I'm a prude. Realized I find it tasteless regardless of relationship status.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/18 10:12 PM
1

If I were to send a SO a nude I'd much rather my face be in it. It might be silly but I would be even less inclined to send just a body. Not for the safety issue but because of a personal ick factor. I'm pretty happy he's not interested in them so I haven't given any thought to cropping my face out before; I'd rather nudes of me not exist at all at this point. Maybe if I get married my spouse will be privy to some. I really don't care if my dick pics were covered by the media even I would care i…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/18 07:47 PM
14

I would be okay with them asking. Hopefully they'd be okay with not getting them. My boyfriend thinks nude are too risky. He's more averse to the idea than I am, so we're good.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/18 02:39 PM
9

At least statistically, it would seem the couple with the 10 year age gap is more likely to get divorced.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/18 12:55 AM
1

I can remember doing it when I felt no enthusiasm for it twice, but I can imagine the actual percentage could be around 2%. Definitely lower than 1 in 20. I've never faked. I frequently don't orgasm but never lie about it. His ego can take it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/18 07:26 AM
1

I don't think I'd do anything to it. It's never been overpowering in awkward situations, and it's rarely failed to turn on when required.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/18 09:34 PM
17

Unmarried.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/18 10:28 AM
2

My mother, who is in her fifties now, has read all of them and enjoyed them. I remember the summer the last book came out my brother, my mom and I kept taking it from each other to read a couple pages when the other two were in the pool, or cooking, or just gone for a few minutes. I doubt she thinks about Harry Potter at all these days, but she liked the books.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/18 04:31 PM
4

Not as long as I can easily enter a happy relationship with someone who isn't a single parent.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/18 06:09 PM
1

Life.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/18 08:58 AM
2

It's one of the most popular ships in the Harry Potter fandom, and the Harry Potter fandom is one of the biggest. I started reading "Drarry" when I was like 11. Ten years later I'm still reading it, but now I write it too. There's slash fanfiction in every fandom. Supernatural. True Blood. Star Wars. Naruto. Game of Thrones. Whatever. It's incredibly popular. And most of it is written by women and girls.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 06:42 PM
2

Can you explain why?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 06:23 PM
5

Do women find lesbian sex as repulsive as straight men generally find gay sex? In general, no. However most of them are still very straight. One possible ramification of it is that an increasing number of previously straight women will start lesbian relationships instead of shacking up with beta providers. Is this what you get off to?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 06:18 PM
2

Gods yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 06:13 PM
2

Yes and happily so, but He didn't tell you about sleeping with other men or being attracted to them when you started dating. I would rather he tell me pretty early on.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/18 06:11 PM
2

That would probably make the situation even more dangerous. Also, I can't legally have one.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/18 11:08 PM
7

Have you never walked outside at night? It is not. Are you also going to ask what I was wearing and whether I'd been drinking?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/18 11:07 PM
8

Or whips his dick out to masturbate to you, or starts following you in the street. "Nice." The stopping the car thing is really creepy. Once a guy did it to me at midnight on an empty street as I was walking the 15 minutes from campus to my place. Once I got rid of him I kept checking over my shoulder.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/18 10:44 PM
3

Yeah, I wouldn't know how to answer this.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/18 07:41 PM
1

I'll mention it to him, thanks! Googling that has me kind of horrified now, but I hate stuff up my nose. It's not for me anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/18 03:28 PM
1

My SO and I have had the flu for the past week or so, so it's been kind of hilarious. We'll be in bed kissing and he'll push me away and reach for a tissue, or for his nose spray. He always has allergies anyway so I've gotten used to it. No way am I spending a week at his place without making out with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/18 03:07 PM
1

I don't think deterrent was the word you wanted there. Other than that, I agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/18 03:02 PM
1

I have lived in several cities and towns in France. Smaller than Paris, but hardly all small. I've lived in one of our biggest cities, besides Paris. Paris is a bit of a special case; not to mention, I would definitely call that phone booth thing weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/17 09:25 AM
2

I can honestly say, with a straight face, that I don't care. All other things being equal, it would be like choosing between two clean glasses when I just need to drink a glass of water. I've been very attracted to guys shorter and taller than me. 5'7 and 6'1 are both taller than me. Whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/17 11:31 AM
1

I received more male attention after a month in Argentina than in a year back home in France. In France it's weird to ask strangers out and I get very weirded out if it happens or even if someone looks at me twice. Here if I don't keep my head down when walking down the street I will get a comment and, if I accidentally meet the guy's eyes, he will chat me up or ask for my number. I have no idea how often these guys are successful, but if my goal was to get the highest number of dates lined up i…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/17 09:16 PM
1

Yeah, but what kind of person uses this word offline? Is it far from mainstream still?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/17 08:38 PM
2

Do people seriously use the word "fuckboy"? Wouldn't even know how to translate that. Slut, now, that's easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/17 06:34 PM
5

That field report sounds hilarious.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/17 01:54 AM
7

Oh dear, you found me out. I'm absolutely terrified that the world at large will discover the truth about female sexual strategy. Oh, and the men who think TRP is bullshit feel the same, of course. None of us here are debating in good faith; we all know TRP is the truth, but we just don't want anyone to find out. Jesus. Think about it. When non reds claim TRP is false or doesnt work, they are doing one of 3 things: Lying, denying, or hiding. See, when I think about it, that's not what I think. A…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/17 01:09 AM
3

Right? I'd be tempted to bite down if it was a serious question. Bit of a mood-killer, love. But I wouldn't believe it was serious in the first place. Pretty sure I'd just assume he thought that was a compliment, unless he asked a second time.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/17 08:31 PM
3

I asked my boyfriend. He hasn't run away yet so I guess the flag was not red enough. I don't really know his exact N, because that's not what I was focusing on when he told me -- I was more interested in how his past experiences happened. My first two boyfriends volunteered the number, because 0. My ex talked about her exes quite freely, so I had a good idea without being curious about the number.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/17 08:25 PM
1

Reading your comment I thought, "Well that's weird, why use 'super' that way so often..." Then it reminded me of something. I checked my chat with my boyfriend and sure enough, in the last twenty-four days, "super" has been used as an adverb 41 times -- mostly by him, but I think he's rubbing off on me. I never used to do that, and funnily enough I dislike it too (not to the point that it's a turn-off though).
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/17 10:34 PM
2

I'm dating a guy who turned 25 this week and every few weeks I think he's a bit old for me. We're very different -- he's a needy extrovert and would happily get drunk every other night. I'm looking at all the answers here and realizing I have no idea what the primary reason is (but at least it isn't his non-existent car). We started because he was cute and persistent and our conversations were great and I was in a mood to give things a chance and forget my ex. I suppose we're still together beca…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/17 09:54 PM
2

The good news is, friends have assured me she's doing better. But yeah, she's been through some stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/17 11:15 AM
5

I know what event triggered the breakup. I know Friday we were perfect and Monday she was ending it. I used to think it was a complicated, unique story, she had issues, etc, etc... but I spun it to myself to try to preserve my shattered heart. Truth is she just couldn't love me enough. To be less vague though, that weekend she learned she'd lost a friend in the Paris attacks, and then hung out with her ex. She told me she'd never seen someone with so many scars (self-harm). And she was scared of…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/17 02:34 AM
4

Not quite zero attraction; but they're certainly not "dreamy" if they only want to fuck. In fact that turns me off like crazy. I was attracted to boyfriend when I met him, but then he hit on me when I met him. I was attracted to my ex the first time I saw her too. It's just I became much more interested when I saw relationship potential there. I can notice a guy, but if he doesn't seem interested romantically it'll never go any further than that initial "Well he's rather cute." I'm just not a pu…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/17 09:44 PM
3

It's simple: no guy who doesn't want me is that dreamy for me. I wouldn't have fucked my boyfriend if he hadn't pursued a relationship, so I certainly wouldn't have practiced my most wifeable skills on him. Same treatment for my ex before anyone says BUT YOU DID IT WITH CHAD. The idea of trying to convince someone into a relationship when they don't want one is just unappealing to me. It's far more reliable to go for the ones who do want a relationship, and even better, want it with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/17 09:22 PM
2

Nothing. Zero, zilch, absolutely nothing. I have no interest in 'offering' a man who doesn't want a relationship with me anything. The question itself is weird for me. I have never, and will never, be in a situation where I feel the desire to get a man to "drop" his other women. If the guy isn't that into me I'm not going to try to seduce him away from someone else, that's just weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/17 07:16 PM
3

It's not mainstream; you're not that out of the loop yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/17 05:53 PM
1

All sorts. I get random cold approaches most often from older men -- people my age tend to express interest in me in more appropriate situations. Some assholes, some great people, some women. Some hot, some not. I think the people I actually date say more about me than the ones I attract. But there is a trend of slightly awkward people, or people with low self-esteem, being drawn to me. May be because I'm quiet and shy. As for friends, hm. Thoughtful people mainly.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/17 03:41 PM
4

I missed that.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/17 08:33 PM
4

I don't shave or wax when single, and I consider not having to consider whether my body hair is unattractive more than once a month one of the few perks of being long-distance. In a relationship I cater to my SO's preferences. My ex didn't give a damn (and I never found her body hair unattractive either), which was nice since I could do whatever. My boyfriend doesn't like body hair so I shave when we're together. It's not a huge deal for me. Outside of my romantic partners and, like, my mom, no …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/17 08:32 PM
3

Oh my god what a relief. You're all nuts.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/17 08:20 PM
1

Not many. It'd be hard to look my parents in the eye for a while though (and not because of my opinions).
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/17 11:28 AM
2

c'est tous les grand cités pour moi. La même pour moi... une promenade en bateau à travers le Danube Damn, you're very likeable in French.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/17 11:21 AM
2

Ah, la province... Que tu es courageux, de t'y être aventuré ! Sans déconner tu vis à Paris depuis longtemps? Paris même ou un peu à l'extérieur? Et, sans ironie, qu'est-ce qui te plait tant?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/17 05:39 PM
2

Je suis redevenue lurkeuse, vous me faites peur.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/17 05:35 PM
1

Pretty. Yeah, that's my only guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/17 04:39 PM
2

Tu parles à un parigot, tu n'auras pas une réponse objective ! Le reste de la France n'aime pas vraiment les parisiens. :D Personnellement, j'aime bien Paris à petites doses, pour visiter, mais je ne voudrais pas y habiter. Quand j'habitais aux États-Unis, un américain nous a demandé, « Paris, c'est loin de la France ? »
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/17 03:55 PM
3

Enfin ! Le premier poste de La Purge que j'apprécie. Bonne initiative. ;)
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/17 03:10 PM
1

Congratulations! And enjoy the honeymoon.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/17 09:59 PM
3

What, not to date someone I'm not attracted to? Mind-blowing I know.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/17 10:48 AM
1

That's funny, my mom liked that ex too and it actually made ending things harder (in my defense I was 17). I love my mom but I don't think she's always spot-on about my love life -- my boyfriend is the only partner we've seen eye-to-eye on. But yeah, I guess I didn't know how bleh it was until I felt the real thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/17 12:14 AM
6

Yup. I liked him though, and he liked me and thought I was pretty. Through the sheer force of his will it worked for 9 months, at which point I started checking out of the relationship and he ended it. I agree now -- I wouldn't do it again and would rather be single. I felt sparks with the next person I dated and was like Woah, is this what it's supposed to be like?. Even after she dumped me I was so grateful for the experience.I consider it a lesson learned to only date people I'm attracted to …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/17 11:57 PM
3

I believe you meant to ask, does dating require effort for men?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/17 10:03 AM
8

I have seen this stated so many times here but still haven't seen it explained in a way that makes the "difference" obvious.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/17 08:59 PM
1

Every time I see a post about makeup here it makes me feel like I should learn. Go up several SMV points? I could be a bombshell. Also, I saw a guy with eyeliner a couple weeks ago... Hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/17 10:01 PM
4

This is my answer too, and I'm too sleepy to write a separate one.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/17 09:05 AM
3

That's a pretty common sentiment, the whole l'amour n'a pas d'âge thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/17 12:20 AM
3

Eh, like I said, I know they exist, but I can't see myself doing it. My boyfriend and I are pretty compatible IMO and not in hugely different life stages but he still feels older (especially since he graduated last year, and I have 2 more years to go) and I sometimes feel like I'm running along trying to catch up, and that's with a pretty small age gap of 3.5 years. I'm glad it's working for you two though. I know happy age-gap couples offline too, so I don't think it has to cause "huge issues."…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/17 12:06 AM
1

Didn't mean "here" as in on reddit, sorry!
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/17 11:48 PM
4

These guys were early thirties to forties. I can't see myself dating someone over 26, and can't think of a reason beyond "sex with 21-year-old" for an older guy to want to date me when he literally called me a baby. So skeevy. My boyfriend is almost 25 and we already feel the age difference even though it's relatively small. I would be uncomfortable dating someone much older even if I met one who was attractive to me, which doesn't happen much. Either he's in a different life stage than I am (no…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/17 10:26 PM
1

I'm 21.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/17 09:46 PM
2

Haha, I did not actually mean here as in on reddit, but here as in in the country I moved to. Hitting on people on reddit would indeed be pretty weird, but I'm sure it's happened.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/17 08:50 PM
1

If I find him, puppy is staying with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/17 08:42 PM
4

Have gotten hit on by a couple older men here, and I dunno guys, I know age-gap relationships are a thing, I know a few, but I have a hard time understanding a woman my age whose reaction wouldn't be Nope nope nope. I'm still basically a kid for these men (one of them exclaimed, "You're a baby!" when he found out my age, yet that still didn't put him off, ick), and they're basically old to me. Still, l'amour n'a pas d'âge for a lot of people, I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/17 08:37 PM
2

Hey, your questions say I'm happy. :) Now I'm satisfied.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/17 02:44 PM
8

Relevant username, I guess. Sheesh.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/17 02:52 AM
3

Illegal is not the same as taboo. I will agree with you that rape is both illegal and taboo. Drunken sex simply is not taboo. Non-consexual sex is illegal. IT IS TABOO - FUCKING ILLEGAL FOR ALL INTENTS AND PURPOSES - for a guy to have drunken sex with a girl. No. No, it is not. Two people having drunken sex? Happens all the time, not taboo in the least.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/17 05:19 PM
4

I was just pointing out the fact that her definition is hardly "creative." It's what you'll find in a dictionary. That said, no, the "situation" you are describing does not meet that definition. Having sex while drunk is not "taboo" in our society -- we do it all the time, watch it happen on television, and talk about it pretty easily. It's just not "culturally forbidden."
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/17 04:55 PM
4

creative definition Where are you getting this from? That is the definition of taboo.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/17 04:40 PM
1

Some answers here for those who missed it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/17 11:16 PM
4

Hahahahahaha.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/17 11:06 PM
2

It's a waste of time regardless. Don't take it too seriously.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/17 11:09 AM
5

No kinks here to speak of, afaik. I wonder how it goes on when you do have a fetish (doesn't fetish, unlike kink, imply something that has to be a part of your sex life?). My boyfriend and I have had conversations about sex, and neither of us fessed up to any kinks. Do people mention their kinks before the first time they have sex to check for compatiblity (I suppose that can go on their online profile), or bring it up later into the relationship and hope for the best?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/17 12:09 AM
7

It's not meant to regulate sexuality. have you considered prostitution? No. I don't need to it to survive, so hell no. Does the fact, that if you're homeless, or desperately need money, that you could prostitute yourself to survive, bring about any comfort? No. Who thinks this way?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/17 08:03 PM
1

What do you mean? Wtf do you think I mean? Seems pretty clear to me. can you elaborate No What accent did she have? French You could probably be friends now, though, right? If we ever ran into each other and she made the first move.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/17 11:46 PM
1

What were the red flags She was pretty unstable. Not in a violent way, but tending towards depression. She had witnessed a suicide, had had a girl she loved commit suicide, blamed herself for the accidental death of a family friend, and still had feelings for her ex. But she was cute and bold and sensitive and wrote poetry and spoke English with an accent, so I didn't stand a chance. why was she relieved you were single She'd much rather I date guys. Even a shitty boyfriend is better than a girl…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/17 09:36 PM
1

I've been heartbroken but not "badly." We were together for less than a year so while it hurt, and the circumstances made me feel terrible, it hasn't scarred me or affected my world view. I wish things had gone differently, not so that we'd still be together, but because the way it ended really fucked me up for a bit. But I kind of deserved it; the girl was a walking red flag. It sucked, I cried a lot for a few months, I had nightmares, I tried to talk to my mom and was met only with relief that…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/17 09:22 PM
5

Mine is 0 in the last 24 hours, and is expected to remain at 0 for the next 24. Click counter probably not necessary.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/17 03:22 PM
16

Who am I to judge?, I could ask myself with a bitter smirk What is it with TRP posts and smirking...
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/17 05:11 PM
1

I think I did some growing up with my first couple relationships, made the mistakes I needed to make, learned the things I needed to learn. Could I have done that with whomever I end up spending my life with? Probably; they'd have been obstacles we overcame together instead of just life lessons. Would I have preferred to? I really don't care enough to say definitively, but probably not -- at least of my previous relationships I would really not want to not have had, but spending the rest of our …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/17 04:05 PM
2

I imagine sex with someone I don't love would feel worse than masturbating to me. I don't think I would say it's because it would lack "passion," but to me sex is a pretty intimate thing that makes me feel vulnerable. The idea of sharing that with just some person squicks me out. Though with a good friend I'm attracted to, it could potentially happen and be enjoyable. I have a hard time imagining putting the focus in "the sex and pleasure itself," to be honest. Sex for me is about closeness, and…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/17 12:28 AM
2

Also agree, good points. You won't see me defending men who abandon their kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/17 11:26 PM
5

And then suppose STIs don't exist? Like I said. The big deal is the lying, to me, vasectomy or not. But OP was saying caring did not "evolutionarily" make sense, so that's why I mentioned children. Suppose a woman has had a tubal; OP would still say it makes sense for her man to have that fear/hatred of being "cucked." I don't think evolution has programmed us to take a vasectomy into account just yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/17 08:39 PM
2

I agree. But if I were only concerned for my own offspring and their survival, that'd be less of a concern.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/17 08:36 PM
8

Cheating in that situation would be a big deal to me not because he's fucking someone else but because of the lying. If we've agreed to be monogamous and he's not, I would feel betrayed and disrespected. It would be a big deal because it would break my trust in him and my confidence that he actually respects me. However, beyond the lying aspect, I don't really buy that there is no reason for women to care about their partner's fidelity. Even if: there was absolutely no chance of the man leaving …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/17 06:42 PM
4

The list of why you thought it was relevant to answer that is too long? Well, I wouldn't like to be in your head.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/17 12:10 PM
3

That's relevant?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/17 09:27 AM
1

Yes, it's pretty exciting. When I got off the plane I had this panicky moment, like Holy shit Lyanina, what were you thinking?, but it has been great so far. Just different enough that I really feel that I'm halfway across the world, but not so different that I feel homesick. And, of course, it's going to be excellent for my Spanish, because so far my impression has been that their English is even worse than ours.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/17 09:33 PM
3

Studying here for a year. :) It's my first time on the continent... And I'm so so glad I decided to come here.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/17 09:23 PM
3

Argentinian men kind of live up to the stereotypes we have in France. I've been called "beautiful" by strangers more times in the last month than in the rest of my life. A lot of things are different here, and interesting to note.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/17 12:56 PM
1

Yea to the marriage thing, much less sure about the kids thing. Certainly the guys I know (and those I have dated) are more eager about having (not even raising, just having) kids than the women I hang out with. My boyfriend thinks having 10 kids sounds like a good idea. Meanwhile many (not all!) of my female friends are like "But my career" (this being skewed of course because most of them are college-educated), "But my body," or just outright "Kids are annoying." I'm not that extreme but dude,…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/17 03:49 PM
1

Most effort I've put into getting into a relationship was, unsurprisingly, not with a guy. I've "fallen" into my relationships with guys. Not because I'm that lazy but because they were interested first. That interest meant they pursued. I sooner or later returned the interest, then they wanted us to be official. My ex-girlfriend I put more effort into because I became interested in her before she even knew I was into women. So I came out to her (can't signal availability if she thinks you're st…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/17 01:15 PM
4

If you think most women approach or even signal availability to the college basketball player you're the one making an "ignorant" comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/17 11:05 AM
5

Not interested in C-ing the title V, but the post sounds weird to me. For one thing, who's been claiming women approach the hottest man in the room? Women in general don't approach the hottest/richest/bestest man they know either, so saying men don't do it seems irrelevant, like who cares. The "men do it too" argument I think when this comes up it's usually because when most relationships are monogamous it makes sense to go for the "best" option available to you, regardless of gender. Just becau…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/17 02:09 AM
1

Her exes will be fine, I'm sure. We've all been through breakups. It sucks at first but from what I know of them they'll be okay. In the end it was only really a few months. For her? Yeah, I can see that.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/17 03:25 PM
1

I said she is not in a LTR. She's realized she kind of sucks at them and doesn't like them that much. I think breaking up a 6 month relationship (at our ages I suppose that can already be considered a LTR) is very different from walking away from your spouse.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/17 03:22 PM
1

Woah. She's not married or similarly committed to anyone. I agree it's obviously not ideal for a LTR, which is why she is not in a LTR.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/17 07:10 AM
2

Oh yeah, I totally agree. A Chad with oneitis for Stacie.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 11:02 PM
2

Wait... is Chad her twin brother?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 04:42 PM
2

Yes, something like that. I call what she likes infatuation not love, but that may just be a vocabulary thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 04:06 PM
1

So... how's it going?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 03:49 PM
3

And I was agreeing with you, so that got lost too apparently!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 02:02 PM
3

I'm not knocking you, the honesty is appreciated. I'm no model either, haha. I doubt many of us here are.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 02:01 PM
8

Reads like the (more honest?) opposite of the beginning of a TRP field report. "I'm 43, 6'1, and not obese, I have great skin and actually look 29, I've been lifting for a week and already seeing gains, and this hottie waitress at the diner I go to alone every night is totally into me."
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 01:51 PM
1

To be honest that was my reaction, but I bit my tongue because I'm way too young to be giving her life lessons and because if that's how she truly feels there's no reason for me to be a bitch about it. If she doesn't want it she doesn't want it. She's social, busy, and happy right now, so I don't think she's doing anything wrong, but I was kind of taken aback by that statement. Just shows she and I enjoy different things really, which I already knew. If in 10 years she says this while also compl…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 01:10 PM
1

Had an interesting conversation about love yesterday. My friend gets bored in relationships and has always fallen out of love by the 6-month mark. As soon as his desire for her company exceeds her desire for his, her romantic feelings die. I remember feeling that with my first 2 relationships (low sexual attraction), but she's been dating longer than I have and it's still a thing. So yesterday she had a few things to say about it -- that she needs the guy to be very independent to maintain attra…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/17 01:10 AM
2

Hi ;)
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/17 12:48 AM
4

I met my boyfriend when he was clean-shaven. xD Half broke my heart when I realized that wasn't a forever thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/17 10:09 PM
2

Pleaaaase.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/17 09:52 PM
2

Yes, it's true that the point of the word "pansexual" as opposed to "bisexual" is supposed to be inclusiveness -- not just of MtF and FtM trans people but also of the other genders that have popped up in the LGBT world. I was just pointing out "pansexual" is not defined as being willing to date with a trans person. It's more of a bisexual+. You've known several women who identified as pan? I thought it was mostly an internet thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/17 09:49 PM
6

Not sure if it counts as something we're not "supposed" to be attracted to, but I'm very attracted to people who kind of challenge gender norms. Could be in small ways like short hair on a woman or long hair on a guy, could be being openly trans, could just be having a hobby that's dominated by the other gender. Obviously, with the necessary condition that I find them reasonably physically attractive. This enhances existing attraction or can create it where before I was indifferent, but it won't…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/17 09:46 PM
2

Pansexual would be not caring about your partner's gender or sex. It's basically bisexual but "inclusive" of non-binary genders. Sleeping with a trans person who presents as your preferred gender doesn't make you pansexual unless you'd also be okay with sleeping with a person of any gender identity and expression.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/17 07:12 PM
1

I'll ask tonight and get back to you then! Could be fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/17 03:44 PM
1

Really? Why so curious? Sorry, I don't think I know him or MBTI well enough to type (Exxx for sure), and he probably won't care enough to test.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/17 03:12 PM
1

don't know
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/17 09:35 AM
1

It was a normal school, but I was what we call an interne, which is kind of like being at boarding school. Only a small percentage of students were boarders and you couldn't sleep there on Fridays and Saturdays though.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 08:57 PM
3

As long as a student let you in you could get into mine. Pretty similar to other buildings.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 08:56 PM
3

Yeah? Doesn't sound like it's worth the trouble tbh. Little Miss Goldigger is welcome to him.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 06:53 PM
1

Oh that's normal though. Engineers knock architects all the time too. :p
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 06:03 PM
1

My boyfriend is an engineer and that's pretty much him. My father is an engineer too though and my mom has a pretty good life with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 05:37 PM
5

Blue, sign me up for egalitarian I guess, depending on what that means to you. Marry: Good boy, selfless and selfish, engineer. Completely selfless is admirable at times, but is probably not something I want in a man I'm going to hitch my life too. I want to be an engineer too so that's appealing. Fuck: Bad boy, selfless, musician. To be honest I'm not a fan of musicians or bad boys or selfless people, but still better than a mamma's boy. Kill: Mamma's boy, selfish, banker. No redeeming qualitie…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 05:21 PM
2

Could still be more fun than recent threads tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 05:15 PM
4

I am still too young for the provider or childbearing stuff to have been an issue (at this age we date for love and excitement and discovery, I guess?), and I haven't date huge, statistically-interesting amounts of people, but everyone I've dated has cared about "how pretty I am," not just guys. It seems kind of normal. There is nothing I "hate" about dating men versus dating women or vice-versa.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 05:13 PM
5

Not sure what a RA is. Aren't those students? Seem to recall that from watching VGHS. There was a guy at the entrance most of the time. If you got too loud he would come. He was also the guy you called if your lamp or showerhead broke. There was security on campus you could call instead of cops. Graduate student staff, negative. Not sure what a resident director is. What are you calling stupid?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 04:49 PM
6

What adult supervision? There was virtually none unless another student called security because the party above was too loud. Sure, that's more than in a private house, but no one was patrolling the halls or whatever. There were drugs, there was alcohol, there was sex and parties, a friend of mine attempted suicide in that building under this intense adult supervision.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 04:16 PM
9

Why is it different if it's for school or for a job? Clearly her parents were okay with it. How do you know mine couldn't have been? i.e. people I kinda sorta know but not really all that well, and their friends/compadres/acquaintances/drug suppliers/beer buyers Sounds like a pretty good description of student dorms to me
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 04:09 PM
9

No, because I was never in a situation where I needed that job. As a 17yo I slept at school during the week anyway, so my parents would have hated also not seeing me for the weekends. You know what else happened when I was 17? I moved 2 hours away to attend university. I roomed in a dorm with a girl I'd never met, with other students, many of them male, having easy access to the building. And yeah, my parents were fine with that.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 03:57 PM
3

I've been having sleepovers since way before I was 17... More like 9. To be fair there was always an adult in the house at that age, but at 17 my parents could definitely leave me home alone for a night if needed.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 03:44 PM
7

These posts are getting ridiculous. So what happens if a woman without a license has sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 03:28 PM
2

Some recent posts/comments just baffle me. I get that legally things could be difficult to prove, but people saying that there's nothing wrong with continuing if the partner gave no signs of non-consent just confuse me. I don't periodically check my partner for signs of non-consent. I am there all the time with them, a witness to their enthusiasm and desire. How hard is it? It's just normal when you're not completely ignoring the person you're having sex with.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 02:41 PM
1

I'm 21, I must be sooo below average. :p
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 02:38 AM
7

And if no one ever came into contact with another person there would never be any sexual assault whatsoever. Yeah, no thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/17 01:26 AM
2

Oh, I see. That sounds just as reasonable as I expected. Thanks for clarifying.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/17 11:58 PM
1

I'm not going to include obvious dealbreakers like lack of physical attraction since the question is if you had an interest in them. When I'm already interested in someone there are many things that thrown up warning flags, but few things that would be an automatic dealbreaker. That said, once I'm interested or we're dating: A mental illness they don't have "under control" and don't follow formal treatment for. I will admit this is probably hard to filter for and I haven't adhered to this one to…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/17 11:38 PM
1

Are you counting alcohol and cigarettes as "any kind of drugs"? I assumed so but I'm intrigued. Also about the travel thing. really likes USA This one made me smile.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/17 11:19 PM
3

I was expecting some slight exaggerations, a couple outrageous statements and some weirdly-placed envy, but this was just absurd.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/17 04:26 PM
2

I have a friend who talks to me about her (not unreasonably frequent) hookups/FWB. This summer she's told me about 3 and I think only one of them was "worth it" (FWB was really good apparently). One started acting like they were dating or something, and the other was chill about but the sex wasn't that great. She says ONS aren't that great, so I asked why she bothered, and she said the flirting and lead-up are fun, but she probably won't bother often again. Sounds annoying to me tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/17 10:04 AM
3

Well, for one thing I'm pretty sure I know better than you do what goes on in my uni. My friend group is not that huge that all the people I know are in it. Mixed-gender friend groups are normal in my university and they are not hard to spot -- people who eat together at lunch, people who chat together in class and pick each other first for group projects, people who always gravitate towards each other at parties. I also very much doubt this is exclusive to my uni, especially since I'm currently…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 10:16 PM
2

I hate it when women I'm not attracted to ask me out on a date and get upset when I reject them. Maybe that is just me in the end. Haha, no, that is everyone! I personally find opposite-gender friendships are worth it anyway, though. With male friends it's a lot easier, you just hangout and participate in hobbies without worrying if they are going to ask you out on a date. Yeah, I've felt similar at times (for female friends obviously), but being asked out doesn't exactly ruin my life. Still, if…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 09:00 PM
3

I've never really known a dude that was chaste as a monk, nope. I'm not saying guys never get called creepy for no reason, but I personally haven't known that many guys who were openly considered creepy and those I did definitely expressed romantic interest in women -- and I know that because some of those women told me about it and how it was creepy. why would you think differently of a woman that said that men and women couldn't be friends? For the same reason I would think differently of a gu…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 08:50 PM
1

No seems like it would seem to result in less drama than being caught in such a big lie. If these are "friends" (who may know you or your social circle to a degree), they could find out. But eh. If it works for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 08:44 PM
2

Yay! Good luck and keep us posted.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 08:33 PM
2

What kind of "excuses to avoid dating them"? I mean, a no could work. My experience is different. I've had friends who I was/am attracted to and friends who were/are attracted to me, but then, I don't find it too hard to stay friends if it's clear the other person isn't interested. At that stage my feelings aren't strong anyway, just a crush.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 08:32 PM
4

I think differently of him as a person. But I don't see how it matters if it's "just for dating" or not if he doesn't believe in male-female friendship. I'd also think differently of a woman who said the same thing, but technically a friendship would still be possible. conservative, religious types I mean, to be honest, I don't have conservative and religious friends. how the hell are our awkward gamer nerds interacting with women and being friends with them without creeping them out? Well to be…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 08:28 PM
9

We talked about this on the other thread, so I guess you already know my stance, but I'll just sum it up in one comment here. I said it would be a red flag. The truth is, I can't imagine meeting and becoming interested in a guy who had no female friends. How did I meet him? Mixed-gender friend groups are pretty normal in my university, and they were also normal in school. I've only dated people I met socially, through friends or at parties, and they were always people who had friends of both gen…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 06:11 PM
1

Huh, thanks for sharing, it's interesting to hear what it's like in other places! I've moved around a bit but the most conservative area I've lived in was Poland and it was also normal to hang out with both genders then. I'm quite happy I grew up the way I did; I haven't felt more awkward around the opposite gender or been approached by guys who were otherwise distant with women. But I can see how a different upbringing would affect that.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 05:47 PM
4

This was how I interpreted the question. If we're all working with different definitions no wonder there's a disconnect. I have friends that I am varying degrees of close to.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 05:41 PM
2

Haha this is honest. I'm an introvert and it's lucky my SO and I met abroad because if we'd met at college or something I'd have been turned off by how social he was. And he might have been more horrified at how not social I am.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 05:35 PM
2

I went to kindergarten in a northern suburb of Detroit, possibly the richest suburb of Detroit. My closest friends at that age were girls but there were also guys. I don't believe gay people walked down the street holding hands back then, though I doubt I'd have noticed if they did. But no one I know considers having mixed-gender friend groups "superliberal." I'm studying engineering and it would depend on the school he went to, I suppose. If I met a guy in my school who didn't have female frien…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 05:31 PM
3

For me yes. Like I said, mixed gender friend group is the green flag. It's situational, and if the guy went to an all-boys' school and works with mainly guys or whatever I won't think much of it, but if he's just had a normal life but is only friends with guys yeah it's as much a red flag as only being friends with girls, to me. Mixed-gender groups are the norm in the circles I hang out in and have been since kindergarten. Also, if the guy doesn't do female friends I'm never going to get to know…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 04:44 PM
3

Mixed gender friend group is a good sign. Only female friends? Not so much. Still, it would depend on how he treats them. My boyfriend has a bunch of female friends, including one of his best friends. But he also has a ton of male friends. He's just a social person. Would you tell your boyfriend to stop talking to his female friends? Lol. Where would that get me.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 04:24 PM
2

The purpose of the law is genetic privacy. That had been my impression as well, thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/17 01:53 AM
1

My money is on blue-haired American feminists.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/17 11:06 PM
1

Yes, unless you go to court (before the 5-year time delay expires). It's okay, it's confusing to me too!
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/17 09:03 PM
1

For a married couple, the husband is automatically present on the birth certificate unless the mother, before giving birth, declared he was not the father. If they're not married the father doesn't have to recognize the kid or be on the birth certificate (and then the mother might go to court for a paternity test...). If you're on the birth certificate but don't raise the kid as yours, you have a longer time delay for actually being able to ask a judge for a test (because if you've raised the ki…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/17 08:01 PM
2

Our health care system is pretty good but it wouldn't be impossible for it to just opt out of covering paternity tests. The justification, as I've read it, is two-fold (please note these are not my personal views): Parenthood in our country is not exclusively biological but also depends on actions; if you've recognized (your name is on the birth certificate) and/or raised the child as yours it is yours (this is called possession d'état); Bodily integrity and wanting to ensure the free consent of…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/17 07:41 PM
3

She also needs to get a judge to order it, yes. Usually by providing some evidence that there was a relationship/intercourse at the time of conception. That also requires the guy's consent. But if the guy refuses, the judge is free to take it as an admission of guilt.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/17 07:26 PM
2

Do you guys think it's going to stay this way? Probably. PPD seems to care about this way more than anyone in France judging by how often it comes up. If I were seeing any visible amount of outrage in France about this, I'd be more interested. As it stands, I don't see why it would change since it's been this way for a while and few people seem to care. The question was raised in Senate in 2013, and didn't get anywhere because apparently our government views paternity (and maternity) as somethin…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/17 07:22 PM
2

She can't "refuse" to get the test. She's not the one who makes that decision. Dude has to get a judge to authorize the test, and for that he probably needs a solid justification. And the child's consent, of course. Edit: If the child is too young to legally give consent, one parent or his legal guardian has to, so in that sense technically the mother could refuse. I'm not sure if the man is allowed to give consent in the child's place, given that he is trying to give up his right to be a parent…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/17 07:11 PM
5

For real. If Frenchmen cared half as much about this topic as PPD does I'd be more interested.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/17 07:04 PM
4

Aren't you being a bit optimistic in assuming men's, even non-blue men's, idea of the perfect male would appeal to most women? women are more likely to create a male that appeals to her personally the most. So if women as a collective could only create one perfect male, would we get a Frankenstein-like mish-mash?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/17 02:15 PM
1

What if both people are drunk? Also, i imagine this would be studied on a case by case basis -- you'd have to be almost black-out drunk to be "prevented from resisting" by alcohol. A drunken mistake isn't rape, certainly not where I live. No where in what I quoted said anything about verbal or non verbal. Ah, my mistake then, I automatically assumed "asking," like talking, was something done verbally.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/17 12:44 PM
1

In your state drunken sex is always rape? Interesting, and fucked up. I already quoted you saying this No, I didn't. I didn't say it never involves verbally asking, but that some people believe it always done. Those two things are different. I was going with the consent definition that OP gave. Non-verbal is a thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/17 09:54 AM
1

I was agreeing with OP and never mentioned legal stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/17 05:21 PM
2

If someone is enthusiastically consenting while a bit more than tipsy, I don't see that as a grey area. There are definitely people here, and even more "out there," who believe affirmative consent is complex and elaborate and requires asking permission and "ruining the mood." Yes, I said the above. Where did I say "affirmative consent never means asking for consent"? I am saying I doubt it And then you said "it can be" sexy, so there's your progress: more like can be than is
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/17 05:21 PM
1

No one? Great, then I'm not arguing, as the legal aspect is not what I'm interested in discussing or qualified to discuss.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/17 04:59 PM
1

Yeah, as stated elsewhere I was not approaching this from a court defense point of view, nor do I think most people do or should approach sex that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/17 04:13 PM
3

Isn't that exactly what OP was saying it isn't? Like I said initially, and like the OP states, I don't interpret consent as asking for permission every 2 seconds, but as being aware of your partner. So to answer you, no, I do not "require" anyone to ask for consent every time they want to escalate a little. I always get and give consent by paying attention and being enthusiastic, sometimes vocally. If he's groping my breast and I'm kissing him and touching him back, that falls under "actively to…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/17 03:17 PM
2

They happen more than you think tho, and how can you have clear consent in such cases? If they're too drunk to consent you can't really. That's deviating from what I was talking about. Seriously? The whole point of affirmative consent is asking for permission and your saying otherwise while promoting affirmative consent. I was asking what "asking for well consent" means. You said "well consent," I have no idea what on earth that means, so I asked for clarification and you decided to come up with…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/17 02:49 PM
3

Nah, I was saying in most cases. Drunken hookups are not the majority of sex going on. Besides, you can have clear consent even in a drunken hookup -- it gets grey past a certain level of drunkenness, and then it's not because of how you gave consent but because of the drunkenness itself. asking for well consent What does this mean? So affirmative consent in no way means asking I didn't say affirmative consent never meant asking for consent, I said it didn't have to break the mood. If both are g…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/17 02:35 PM
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