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Matter_Still Archive

View 0 posts and 2,754 comments by Matter_Still on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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0

I'm a suspicious sort and to me, it is a major, capital "M" red flag when a woman doesn't want her friends to know she is going to be seeing you. When you couple that with her physical assault because you refused a kiss while she was intoxicated, you've now got two warning lights on the panel. Remember, up to a certain point alcohol deinhibits. Then, most damningly, there's the "let's just be friends" disclaimer, which under certain circumstances is a decent option, but which, in her case, is so…
/r/seduction28/07/26 06:30 AM
1

You have a lot to say unless you’re a shut in who doesn’t have a television set, cell phone, or PC. Your problem is you’re afraid of a woman’s response to what you have to say.
/r/seduction27/07/26 11:36 PM
1

There are many “iterations” of vampire stories, also. It doesn’t make them true.
/r/seduction27/07/26 07:33 AM
3

You’re going down a bad path. If you’re memory is correct and you had 20 drinks with 1 1/2 ounces of alcohol in each drink over an 8-hour period you’re flirting with possible alcohol poisoning. Your liver’s alcohol-processing capacity is maxed out, there’s a surge of toxic acetaldehyde in your blood, and your blood-sugar regulation. Ninety percent of the alcohol goes unprocessed which is why you have memory black outs. If this was a one off you dodged a bullet. (I know a kid who wasn’t so lucky.…
/r/seduction27/07/26 05:47 AM
1

Thanks. Except for the Michael Jordon quote, it’s mine. In my jack-of-all-trades-master-of-none existence, when the bottom-line required it, I’ve done editorial work for a publisher of science journals, been a ghostwriter, a night editor for a media outlet in a major market, contributed to a text book, and written speeches. Since I’ve researched, read, and edited hundreds of articles and books I suppose it’s plausible that a phrase, or even a sentence or two, may have percolated out of my memory…
/r/seduction26/07/26 11:43 PM
1

That is nonsense. Women, like men, initially respond to appearance and what they are attracted to is all over the board. Posture, for example, is a huge source of attraction because it connotes health. Guys who believe money is at the top of the list most likely don't have the amount they feel is defacto attractive.
/r/seduction26/07/26 08:51 PM
1

Glad to hear it. I understand your frustration. Insofar as the “Blues” pre-practice or pre-show briefs go, I’m familiar with the process. It’s similar to the way some surgeons prepare for an operation. Keep in mind two things about rehearsing as a tactical pilot might: first, whether it’s the Blues, T-Birds, or Red Arrows, these pilots are masters of their craft, having been exceptionally trained, with at least 1,500 hours of experience. While demo flying is a different breed of cat, they have d…
/r/seduction26/07/26 11:13 AM
2

Only if you know the precise reason for the failure, which is what rejection is, and it is rare that one gets anything more than a generic, “I’m just not attracted to you” or some other non-specific reason for the failure, which is what rejection is.
/r/seduction26/07/26 10:51 AM
5

You must realize that a lazer-like focus on one girl (or woman) can result—and has—for many in a fulfilling relationship that could last for years or a lifetime. This adversion to “catching feelings” as if it is a virus to be avoided or treated is a relatively new development. One of the feelings you “catch” if you’ve invested in the right woman is a feeling of peace, the kind that comes when you know your days and night in the bloodsport of dating are a thing of the past. Unless you’ve had that…
/r/seduction25/07/26 11:35 PM
1

This business of “process over outcome” (insofar as I can tell) was first promoted by Eric Markovic on page 39 of his “Mystery Method”: “A venusian artist goes into the field night after night primarily to improve his calibration and to internalize his skill-set. He's not trying to 'get laid.… .”Rather, he's practicing with the long-term goal of having a powerful social skill-set.” This disclaimer doesn’t pass the laugh test. From the moment Markovik walked into a club, museum, or a Taco Bell, i…
/r/seduction25/07/26 07:05 PM
1

The idea that one should be “process-oriented” rather than “results oriented” is one of Erick Markovick's most senseless ideas. I don’t know how or where or why this ridiculous notion got traction. I cannot think of a single meaningful thing in life that people do because the “process” rather than the goal is the dominant consideration. Going to med or law school? No. Becoming a professional athlete, artist, or entertainer? Again, no. How about having sex itself? Absolutely not. It’s all about o…
/r/seduction25/07/26 10:57 AM
1

Why would you give a damn what any other guy would, or would not, do? Would you go to the court of public opinion and ask complete strangers , “There’s a girl at work who is an atheist (or a born-again Christian or whatever), should I ask her out?”
/r/seduction25/07/26 10:24 AM
1

She was a bit confused but not in any way put off. The “coach” giving these tutorials had previously produced two or three videos on avoiding the friendzone and, if in it, getting out. In one subsequent video he then, after she politely refuses his entreaties (she had a boyfriend), asks not once, but three times, if they could stay in touch as friends. I’ve always thought that the loathed “friendship zone” was equivalent to a leper colony: it was in no way a place you wanted to be, and if cast t…
/r/seduction25/07/26 07:01 AM
1

He’s also said the woman he corrals looks like a spy on her way to a secret mission.
/r/seduction25/07/26 05:37 AM
2

To summarize: you were in a relationship, it ended, you turned to “game”, and now you can’t get past “Hello”. Somehow, three years ago, you managed to find a woman without all the contrived, theoretical B.S. Just think about what you did to impress the girl you were with before you thought you needed method. Above all, keep in mind that just being lucky is a big part of it. There are guys who will be dead by midnight who were just in the wrong place at the worst, possible time. So it is with mee…
/r/seduction24/07/26 09:40 PM
3

I’ve always wondered about that sort of bean counting myself. This is the second or third guy who cited a “box score” with the title “I’ve had “X” number of women in “Y” amount of time but this one is confusing: It’s “79 women later” but 30 in the past six months—as if the accounting itself is verification of some level of knowledge. There are a few things missing: how many approaches were necessary to rack up this number? What was the attractiveness of the woman? A friend of mine must have had …
/r/seduction24/07/26 06:35 PM
1

He's neither. His speech is often hesitant, awkward, rambling, and more like mustard than butter, i.e., "I saw you all dressed in black. You look like a very important businesswoman who fires a lot of people."
/r/seduction24/07/26 11:25 AM
1

It's among the worst places to seek advice because 90% of it is merely the passed-on dogma of self-annointed gurus, almost of all whom had serious issues: Mark Manson had a significant drinking problem, Eric Markovik was suicidal and now has a bot girlfriend, Neil Strauss was a self-proclaimed sex addict, while both Owen Cook and Julien Whoever bragged about committing sexual abuse. This collection of miscreants were not geniuses. You can separate the tortured man behind the masterpiece--Hemingw…
/r/seduction24/07/26 11:22 AM
2

Truth is once again of no interest to those who can quote Julian or Erik Markovick like a Baptist and the Bible. It’s astonishing that anyone who has spent any time at all with women can believe there are universal hacks to get them to perform like trained seals.
/r/seduction24/07/26 12:11 AM
16

Here's everything I learned in less than twenty-five words, all spoken by a woman in less than 30 minutes. "I love you. I hate you. No, both. I love you and I hate you. Stay away from me. Hold me, nice."
/r/seduction23/07/26 11:35 PM
1

I t didn’t matter what you said. She began to shut the door with not being impressed by either choice and slammed it shut with “I have a boyfriend”—proving once again asking for, an getting an IG is often a weak strategy utilized by guys who, for whatever reason, cannot ask for what they want up front. Had you asked her out at the party you would have known where you stood immediately.
/r/seduction23/07/26 04:25 PM
2

At its peak, Trans World Airlines, a historic carrier, had 2,500 pilots. Pilots have a seniority number which denotes when they were hired. The pilot flying for the airline the longest would have seniority #1, the most-recent hired, #2,500. This pilot was #3. He had been with TWA since the 1940s. This gave him a tremendous amount of credibility. So, when he suggested a book written by another pilot had a great deal of fiction in it, you didn’t question it. Owen Cook has a reputation, like some a…
/r/seduction23/07/26 03:20 PM
2

You’re at an entirely different level than the OP. You have learned that going with the prevailing winds is exponentially more productive than bucking a strong headwind. In my example, I explicitly used the example of a woman still entangled with a guy fraying at the edges, and he still couldn’t see the practicality of going to a neutral corner. If they were not meant to be shorn, they would not have been born sheep.
/r/seduction22/07/26 07:52 PM
1

She is the same girl, just one that needed to sleep with you “a couple of times” to discover it wasn’t working.
/r/seduction22/07/26 02:12 AM
22

And sets the table.
/r/seduction22/07/26 02:07 AM
23

She sounds like an unqualified moron who will eat her young. What kind of idiot tells numerous coworkers she’s cheated on her husband?
/r/seduction22/07/26 02:06 AM
19

If that’s you’re idea of good advice, I can’t imagine what you consider bad advice.
/r/seduction22/07/26 02:04 AM
6

There’s nothing overt in that sequence that suggests she’s buying what you’re selling. It’s likely just banter with a steep downside for both of you.
/r/seduction22/07/26 02:01 AM
5

Gracias. No hay ni uno solo de esos gurús en quien yo confiaría. Cuántas veces has leído sobre tipos que repiten como loros las estupideces de los "PUA" (artistas del ligue), solo para acabar siendo rechazados de forma estrepitosa? Puede funcionar a veces? Claro. Como te diría cualquier criador de cerdos: “hasta un cerdo ciego se topa con algo de maíz de vez en cuando.”
/r/seduction21/07/26 11:16 PM
2

Check it out. This uber-fraud is giving bootcamps and then cozying up with a bot—and notice that not one of his past or present fanboys has mentioned it. It’s like finding out your oncologist is going to a mexican healer for his testicular cancer. This is from Yahoo news. (I’m even curious about that book. I wonder if he negged her into submission.) Yahoo News: Erik von Markovik, the notorious "pickup artist" known by his stage name Mystery, is apparently obsessed with an AI girlfriend. Last mon…
/r/seduction21/07/26 11:01 PM
4

It depends. If she said, “My dad just broke his hip.”, the natural response would be, “Jesus, how?” or if you’ve developed any degree of connection, “Do you have friends, here? Do you need a ride somewhere?” If it’s the boyfriend thing, “Maybe I should let you sort this out. I’ll be at the bar if you want to catch up when you’re done.” If she’s interested she’ll attempt to reconnect, if not, c’est la guerre.
/r/seduction21/07/26 10:49 PM
22

Do you notice how these guys cherrypick their successes. It’s far more likely that a conversation goes like this: Guy: “What’s going on?” Girl: “It’s my ex. I can’t get him to understand it’s over. Even worse, he’s started to… Guy (loudly) : “Do you want to have sex in the bathroom or by the dumpster?” Girl (confused, perhaps startled): “What the hell is your problem? And, no. I don’t want to have sex with you anywhere, Romeo.”. (walks away with an eye roll). There’s two problems with this anecd…
/r/seduction21/07/26 07:52 PM
1

Yes. There are always newsy items you can discuss. “How’d you survive the heat wave?”, “What are your plans for the holidays?” They even work as openers, “Is it just me, or is the air conditioner off?” That can even segway into talking about feelings. “Maybe I should have stayed home, but sometimes I just like being around people. You ever feel that way?”
/r/seduction21/07/26 11:32 AM
1

I can certainly identify with that. The “one” for me got engaged to a guy (secretly) when we were living together. The miraculous thing was that it took about a month for the acute pain to decide and less than two for me to feel almost ecstatic she was gone. She was just too damn unpredictable. We’d been in each other’s lives for almost nine years when the wheels came off. I took complete responsibility since I knew early on it wasn’t right but, good Lord, she was a fox and that covers a lot of …
/r/seduction21/07/26 11:22 AM
1

I would have never seen that coming; settling into genteel domesticity with a wife and kids, yes. It even happened to Warren Beatty. But “AI Pyschosis”? Never, but he claims it was loneliness that spurred him on and that can be a terrible affliction. I’m no fan but I hope he can find solace in the arms of a flesh and blood woman again, if he ever really knew it.
/r/seduction21/07/26 11:14 AM
1

Was the relationship one that seemed too good to be true? Did it reimagine what you thought was possible? Did you come away thinking, "Nothing is beyond my reach."--or was it just something you were involved in? The kind of "homerun" I'm talking about is one that seemingly defied the odds, one that you thought could never happen to you?
/r/seduction21/07/26 06:04 AM
3

Friendly: "So, how's the new job?" (Just the facts, ma'am.) Her: "It will do for now. I'm waiting to hear from Northwestern about a long-term position." Seductive talk: "I was looking at some old photos and came across the one with you at Steve's wedding... ." (Translation: I could kick myself for not telling you how I felt that night.) Her: "I remember there was this moment during the ceremony, you looked at me...like...well, I wondered what you were thinking." (Translation: I could kick myself…
/r/seduction21/07/26 05:59 AM
1

I'm genuinely curious. How do those who think Mystery is the alpha and omega of seduction feel now that he's announced he has an AI girlfriend while also extolling the virtues of being in love with code?
/r/seduction20/07/26 09:57 PM
4

"Friendly" conversation is an exchange of ideas; conversation that creates attraction is a back-and-forth volley of expressed feelings.
/r/seduction20/07/26 09:51 PM
2

Then, you're doing everything you can and might take comfort in knowing many of us had the same problem until we had one success, after which the problem was gone. Once you hit a home run or ace a test, you know it's possible, and that changes everything.
/r/seduction20/07/26 08:02 PM
1

One never knows where that line in the sand is. It can be very narrow and rigid, or wide and flexible.
/r/seduction20/07/26 07:59 PM
1

That was his problem: it was only funny to him.
/r/seduction20/07/26 06:46 PM
1

No. It only works if you cross a certain level of attractiveness in her eyes.
/r/seduction20/07/26 06:45 PM
0

If this comment is representative of what you’re focusing on when you see a woman, your problem is not difficult to spot. I bet you used the words “I”, “me”, and “I’m” a hundred times. “I”, “I”, “I”. You also cited what appeared to be about twenty different situations: girls together, girls with men, one girl walking towards you, one girl on line in a movie, a girl with a male friend, etc., etc., ad nauseam. I don’t think you’re going to find your answer on reddit; in a counselor’s office, maybe…
/r/seduction20/07/26 05:45 PM
1

There it is, again: everything was predicated on sex after the first date. She sniffed that out and the question is, what was the rush?
/r/seduction20/07/26 10:06 AM
1

Erik Markovick is to blame for the ridiculous 7-hr rule—that is, you should be able to have sex with a woman, on average, within 7 hours. The guy was batshit crazy—as demonstrated by fact that he now has an AI girlfriend he fell in love with out of “loneliness”.
/r/seduction20/07/26 10:02 AM
2

You can begin by questioning if you really need it. Consider an analogy: if some guy claimed to be healthy, you absolutely needed to supplement with 3,000 mgs of vitamin c daily, 2,500 milligrams of vitamin D3, 2 grams of calcium, 500 milligrams of magnesium, 2 grams of omega fatty acids, 15 mgs of zinc, three mcgs of B12, 35 mcg of chromium, eating six ounces of seaweed, 16 mg of niacin, and 55 mcg of selenium, BUT you knew numerous guys who didn’t take even one of those supplements but were ro…
/r/seduction19/07/26 06:06 PM
2

I never considered you in whatever sense “twat” connotes I might be inclined to use that for a guy like Neill Strauss who claims he could never write a book like “The Game” again but who still sells it on his website. Then, too, there’s Mark Manson who, after all these years, still doesn’t get what “consent” is and makes claims like (not verbatim) “Even if she says ‘no’, she’s still turned on by a man aggressively pursuing sex.” If there is a guy who has proven himself to be a “twat”, it’s Eric …
/r/seduction18/07/26 10:03 PM
4

As a rancher once told me, “Meat ain’t meat until it’s in the pan.”
/r/seduction18/07/26 12:08 PM
1

The proof that fawning over a woman in specific circumstances is not a reading assignment for him. It’s evidence that if a woman is attracted to you, you can throw out all the arbitrary rules. There won’t be a need to “neg”, “push-pull”, “calibrate”, “break rapport”, or attempt to manufacture “smv”. Her attraction for you has already made those things unnecessary. I learned that when completely undone by a girl whose beauty and sensuality left me almost mute at times. She took over in the same w…
/r/seduction18/07/26 07:06 AM
1

Think of the possibilities: if it’s a batting cage and she is pretty good (maybe she played woman’s softball), you might have a swing like Aaron Judge but you take a dive and then say, “I’m not proud, what do you charge for lessons?” If it’s miniature golf you play a game blowing a few easy putts and then make a small wager on the second one—coffee or ice cream. You lose and say, “Why do I think I was hustled?” She might even think you were being chivalrous or being sweet to let her win. “No way…
/r/seduction18/07/26 06:54 AM
2

Who’s talking about criminality? The issue is common, common sense. If I’m attracted to a girl who is up for a first date and she says, “You know what would be fun? A batting cage.” Guess where we’re going. If she says, “I was thinking, I haven’t played miniature golf since high school. I really enjoyed that.” Another trick question: where are we going? Why would you respond to her suggestion to go to a batting cage, bowling, or even to a spelling bee with, “We should get to know each other bett…
/r/seduction17/07/26 11:43 PM
1

It's conjecture either way. First, the absence of negging is in no way the same as doing nothing. Second, as I can prove by many documented examples, some women respond very enthusiastically to being fawned over, and some men can do that without feeling emasculated.
/r/seduction17/07/26 09:13 PM
8

My guess is the subtext of “I like ropes” was not as charming as you think, and in her mind triggered a picture of a guy who was into stuff she found offensive. Even if that’s not the case, you totally blew a layup: “I wanna go to a batting cage or something fun.” An easy follow-up, like “A batting cage? I would never have thought of that? What else would you like to do?” But, no, you tried to funnel her into bed—isolate her in your place, and cook a meal as a lure. That was pretty heavyhanded—a…
/r/seduction17/07/26 08:53 PM
4

Beyond idiotic, isn’t it. Why not just say, “Before you go out next time, use this bar of soap.”?
/r/seduction17/07/26 08:42 PM
7

I think you’re in trouble. The fact that you think a “bad breath neg” is anything other than offensive and that it will jumpstart conversation is, in my opinion, evidence that you need to forget everything you think you’ve learned to date. Be honest. If a woman overtly suggested your breath was offensive, how would you respond?
/r/seduction17/07/26 08:41 PM
1

Counselors know based on thousands and thousands of in vivo experiences, you ignore the behaviors of clients you don't want to reward. Example. "So, how was your week? "Not bad. I just noticed. You have a bit of a lisp." "So, I've been told. How are you doing with that problem at work? With a Diva: Her: "Are you really that happy working for the sanitation department?" Guy: "I never really think about it." Her: "My last boyfriend was an orthopedic surgeon. Guy: "How about the one before that?" H…
/r/seduction16/07/26 09:49 PM
1

One can be intimidated by many things without caving. There is your opponent in a football game, an FAA examiner jumpseating, and, yes, beauty. But you're belief that "negging" separates you from the crowd "and sets you apart from the average guy" is, to put it kindly, an unverifiable generalization. Again, I'll direct you to the love letters of some of history's most renowned Lotharios. Disraeli treated Queen Victoria with "chivalrous devotion," and she lapped it up. In his memoirs Casanova wro…
/r/seduction16/07/26 07:47 PM
2

It’s ridiculously counterintuitive. The girl you’re negging may have known nothing but criticism her entire life and she’s going to start breathing heavily because you say, “Is she always this rude?”?
/r/seduction16/07/26 09:28 AM
2

Someone doesn’t like your common-sense take, which is spot on. The fact is, as you said, because a girl “just liked me”, I did all the crazy “simp” shit the pickup gurus and their devotees ridicule, and still got the girl: I was o.k. in the much-maligned friendzone; I put her on a pedestal so high she had nosebleeds; I complimented her beauty as if I was getting paid for each time I used the word “most”; I chased and then chased harder and faster; the outcome was the only thing that mattered. A …
/r/seduction16/07/26 09:24 AM
1

I don’t know why anyone would secretly downvote you. I was never a fan of this kind of gatling gun approach. I was in NYC a few days ago and thought “If I were single, how many woman would I see that merited ab approach?” It was ridiculously few, primarily because the logistics were not in my favor—i.e., they were apparently rushing to catch a train, on a cell phone conversation, wore a ring, or displayed another challenge. I suppose, though, if the end game is a hit-and-run lay, none of that ma…
/r/seduction16/07/26 06:37 AM
1

You’re right, but too kind. Recording a woman secretly so you can plaster it on YouTube (or for any reason without her knowing about it) is creepy and would likely disgust her if she knew it.
/r/seduction16/07/26 06:26 AM
1

There are tens of millions of people who believe the strangest things “work”—ouija boards, tarot cards, pendulums, and psychics to name a few. “Negs”, as the creator of the term decreed, are used to take a woman down a notch to increase attraction—one among many of his ridiculous tactics. If a woman is attracted to you she may let that idiocy slide; if not your status as a fool will be established.
/r/seduction16/07/26 06:20 AM
12

Ah, the old “Beet Soup story”. Meeting women is like learning how to make beet soup. No, for a lot of us it was more like being a horny Sisyphus. Sisyphus, as legend has it, pissed off Zeus who condemned him to rolling a massive boulder up a hill, only to watch it roll back down. Every time. There are two ways to look at Sisyphus’ problem. First, one can see him as futile and meaningless struggle against a rigged game—or, one can take Albert Camus’ view: we can imagine Sisyphus as ultimately hap…
/r/seduction14/07/26 06:05 PM
1

At the top of the list, get rid of all the arbitrary categories—“simp”, “chad”, “incel”, etc. They are abstractions that create artificial categories. Furthermore, the word “incel” is bullshit. In the overwhelming majority of cases the declared “involuntary celibacy” is a choice. There are, I suppose, paraplegics and quadriplegics as well as others with severe physical limitations who cannot have penetrative sex, but the healthy male who identifies with Elliot Roger and abandoning sex and women …
/r/seduction14/07/26 05:12 PM
1

Order your fears in a way that reflects how frightening and inevitable they are. Death. Inescapable, certain, and could happen in an hour or in 50 years. Aging. Inescapable, certain, and with it will be the diminution of your vigor, health, and perhaps capacity to take care of yourself. Disease. Almost certain, acute or chronic, curable or incurable. Pain (physical). Inescapable, certain, mild to unbearable. Emotional pain. Almost certain, inescapable, mild to unbearable. Loss. Certain, inevitab…
/r/seduction13/07/26 06:29 AM
1

The best thing that ever happened to women was guys stopped asking for dates and became satisfied getting their IGs. This gave them a painless way to say, “no”. There could be no debate or negotiation. It was a no-hassle (on their) part way to reject a guy—and still most don’t seem to learn. Guys still think getting an IG is an accomplishment.
/r/seduction12/07/26 01:20 PM
0

Fair enough: as a general rule there’s no way of knowing whether the woman you are attracted to dates two times a week or hasn’t had a date in two years. Another “general rule”: as a general, the general rules of human behavior are generally illusions based on cherrypicking.
/r/seduction12/07/26 01:02 PM
4

The situation almost always provides the raw material for conversation. Ideally, and this happens more than you might realize, you can see a girl in a certain situation—she rides the same train as you every day, studies in the same library, etc. This gives you time to formulate a plan. In my own situation once, a girl was in the same class. I did nothing the first class, second, or third. On the fourth, I caught up with her leaving the classroom. On the fifth, week two, I gave her a ride to her …
/r/seduction12/07/26 12:56 PM
0

Are you suggesting universally that a very attractive man will have infinitely less options than an unattractive woman?
/r/seduction12/07/26 12:29 PM
15

It has to be said again…and again…and again: there is no one-size fits all. Not only must an approach be tailored to the particular woman, but there are constraints of time, situation, context, and place. You might have an hour on the beach to approach someone, 30 minutes in an airport lounge, and ten minutes on a bus. And that’s only one variable in the equation.
/r/seduction12/07/26 12:26 PM
-1

It’s nothing like eating one food for the rest of your life and the fact that you would resort to such a feeble analogy is telling, when all you had to say is, “Some of us are just not cut out for marriage.” I don’t think I’m alone when suggesting I would not trade the “pizza” I eat for a mean in every Michelin-rated restaurant on the planet.
/r/seduction11/07/26 09:32 PM
3

It’s like tasting sugar or salt: you know it when you do.
/r/seduction11/07/26 08:47 PM
3

Am I mistaken, or did the Three Amigos of Game, Erik Markovik, Neil Strauss, and Mark Manson “ditch” game for marriage? Maybe “Mystery” should have remained single as his wife has seemingly taken a back seat to his AI lover, “Miss Shira Always”. (Neil Strauss cheating on his wife, all things considered, seems fairly normal.) I thought the Mstery/Shira affair had to be a spoof in The Onion, but apparently not. Yahoo Entertainment claimed, “Erik von Markovik, the notorious "pickup artist" known by…
/r/seduction11/07/26 08:21 PM
1

“ I didn't let her off the hook.” That’s an interesting choice of words. You had a choice. You could have said, “Take a deep breath. I get it but trust me. This is the only way to solve your problem and if you want to get it right, it may take another minute or two.” You chose to admonish her, wag your finger in her face, and remind her of her status as a damsel-in-distress and yours as a white knight. Even worse, you rode off, metaphorically, leaving her on her own with the dragon about to devo…
/r/seduction11/07/26 07:18 PM
2

I can’t disagree with you, and yet neither you nor I really know what’s going on with him.
/r/seduction11/07/26 05:15 AM
7

Completely? No. In some ways, yes. The red flag here is what appears to be an unusual preoccupation with being accused of sexual assault. I don’t think I’ve ever heard that fear voiced before by a guy on the cusp of his first time; performing poorly, certainly. An unwanted pregnancy? Of course. But the fear of being accused of molestation. I never heard that.
/r/seduction11/07/26 05:12 AM
11

It does’t seem as if he’s emotionally ready for this.
/r/seduction11/07/26 02:33 AM
1

You must have done well in organic chemistry. Cocaine and dopamine do not bind to the same targets in the brain . Cocaine acts as a "blocker," whereas dopamine acts as a "key" to turn on signals. Put simply, no, cocaine euphoria is in no way similar to the moderated physiological effects of dopamine.
/r/seduction11/07/26 12:57 AM
1

Not likely. If you have other areas of your life that seem flat, that lack of motivation can be caused by many things: hormonal fluctuations, low testosterone, nutritional deficiencies, sleep issues, CFS, and job stress. If your “low drive” is only apparent when thinking about approaching women, it’s almost certainly situational and highly improbable a “dopamine” deficiency could affect one aspect of your life only.
/r/seduction11/07/26 12:54 AM
0

I gave you ideas. You just didn’t like them: first, the line you suggested was quite likely offputting. The other was an established fact. The content of communication is more important than the tone. Use whatever tone you want and tell someone you despise them.
/r/seduction10/07/26 11:08 AM
2

Absolutely. Turn the encounter into a pissing contest. Let her know who's boss — the potentially very lonely top dog.
/r/seduction10/07/26 06:52 AM
0

"Anyway it really doesn't matter what he says, it's how he says it." This fiction is on the short list of fictions preached by every PUA guru since Erik Markovik began preaching his gospel. It's predicated on flawed, redacted research by social psychologist, Albert Merhabian, who developed a model of communication that suggested verbal communication was 7% words, 38% tone of voice, and 55% body language. It's not. If you need proof, approach a woman, confidently, and say, "Don't take this person…
/r/seduction10/07/26 06:50 AM
1

Why not? First it can be perceived as insulting. (Staring is generally considered offensive.) Second, nothing is charming or humorous about it, and, third, you're using a line you've thought about rather than letting what you say be dictated by the circumstances. There are a few more reasons, but those are the obvious ones.
/r/seduction10/07/26 06:38 AM
1

There's a difference between an "indicator of interest" and an "indicator of curiosity", and that difference is often not perceived by those who don't know the difference exists.
/r/seduction10/07/26 06:33 AM
1

So based on your interpretation of one word, “miniscule”, you assume I don’t have “much real-world” experience? Let me put things in perspective: I am employed by an American legacy carrier—a major U.S. airline. In that capacity, excluding the nearly six years of being furloughed in the aftermath of 9/11, on average,I have “met” (since you used that word) at least 20 women a month—FAs, gate agents, passengers, etc. If you toss in those laying over in the same hotel, it was easily more than 30. T…
/r/seduction08/07/26 10:25 PM
2

“But here's the truth: She's not gonna change” So, in your vast experience—or Chatgpt’s—you have collected enough evidence to state, unequivocally, that no woman ever changed or can change once she has blown you off? That’s interesting but unequivocally false. People change radically all the time. Lifelong atheists become believers, lifelong believers become atheists. This well-established truth of human nature is why, among others, works of literature such as “A Christmas Carol”, “Les Miserable…
/r/seduction08/07/26 04:21 PM
-3

How, exactly did you generate your “odds” given the opposite claim could be made equally as frivolously? Then, too, your claim that “ no woman ever respects a man she rejected” is equally suspect. What is that based on? Your personal experience? That’s limited? Anecdotes? They’re also limited. And on what grounds do you assert that walking away will elevate your esteem in her eyes and lead her to assume you have a harem to fall back on? In less then 100 words you stacked seven assumptions, none …
/r/seduction08/07/26 03:39 PM
4

Many of these guys are cultists who have come to believe Mystery, Style, Manson, and Cook are courtship's equivalent of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. Beneath it all, there is palpable misogyny, which, of course, many will deny. What else do you call the employment of trickery, deceit, and attempts to manipulate in the quest to get laid? In a sense, "Game" is the hapless guy's Dianetics and Erik Markovick in L. Ron Hubbard in platform shoes, a funny hat, and sporting ski goggles. How can anyone n…
/r/seduction08/07/26 09:32 AM
4

"The opportunity - the other man has some game and genuinely desires the married woman. Then he'll successfully seduce her." Good God, have you taken the cheese! You genuinely believe that "some game" and "desire" will be enough to lure any woman into an affair. Even Casanova could not believe such a ridiculous thing. You clearly could not find the time to read his celebrated autobiography, Histoire de ma vie, in which he tells of numerous occasions where his infamous charm failed to win over ma…
/r/seduction08/07/26 07:40 AM
4

No. Stats don’t work that way. In a population of 1,000 in which 200 will die of, let’s say, cardiovascular disease, each member of that population does not have a 1:5 chance of dying from heart disease. Other factors such as a history of smoking, hypertension, obesity, and familial genetics influence mortality. Consequently, a fit non-smoker, non-drinker with no family history of CVD may only have a 5% chance or a 1% chance of dying from heart disease. Furthermore, your assumption that infideli…
/r/seduction08/07/26 07:07 AM
18

I’ve worked for a U.S. legacy carrier for more than 20 years and in that capacity have talked to thousands of women—flight crew, flight attendants, and gate agents, not only for my airline but for BA, Lufhtansa, Quantas, Air France, KLM, JAL, Air India, and Emirates to name a few. Those women who were married have had the means, motive (loneliness, long periods away from home, etc.,), and opportunity to cheat but, at most, one-in-ten have, and it’s easy to spot when they do. You are gun-shy abou…
/r/seduction08/07/26 05:56 AM
2

I knew this comment/question by the O.P. would flush out those who buy into the ridiculous fiction that women are hardwired to cheat and that the game is rigged to make it easier for them. Bullshit. Men cheat more frequently. Even worse than this misogynist delusion is the cavalier attitude some guys have about f’ing another person’s spouse. It’s not a mere guilty pleasure without potential catastrophic collateral damage: a marriage can be destroyed and a family torn apart. There’s a reason for …
/r/seduction08/07/26 05:42 AM
2

I suppose you have reliable data to prove that statement.
/r/seduction08/07/26 03:03 AM
8

“The reality is that your woman will cheat on you given the opportunity if you have been married for several years.” What exactly is “given the opportunity”? How many years is “several”, and how do you account for the fact that husbands are more inclined to commit adultery than wives?
/r/seduction08/07/26 02:56 AM
-1

You don’t need to do that—and by that I mean, any of that. There is no need to say you have to be somewhere when you don’t; no need to “neg”—that is, to attempt to knock her down a peg; no need to produce a coin from her ear, nor is there any need to create the illusion that you’re popular with women if that would be stretching it. Above all, there is no need—and it’s deplorable—to treat a girl like she’s a puppy you’re trying to paper train. One more thing: here’s the other side of the story: t…
/r/seduction07/07/26 09:07 PM
1

The not-very-skilled “influencer” known as “Wheat Waffles” is, basically, a very-average looking redheaded guy whose skin appears to have the tone of a mild sunburn bordering on pale. In his own words, he is not “ugly”, which suggests to me he does not see himself as particularly attractive, and is likely the reason he attributes his failures to his looks, or lack of them. His texts, as indicated by examples, indicate a markedly poor ability to communicate with this method: Him: Did you get the …
/r/seduction07/07/26 07:18 PM
3

First, where is it written that in any circumstance a compliment diminishes the status of the one giving a compliment or that it is a form of pedestalizing? The opposite can be true. A study in “Nature” found that women perceived men who employed metaphorical comments more attractive. It is the abuse of literal compliments that can be a problem and not compliments, per se. The well-crafted metaphorical compliment can be completely disarming.
/r/seduction07/07/26 11:07 AM
1

Nothing wrong with that even if some extremists would think you’re putting her on a pedestal but, again, if you preach the “Don’t worry about outcomes” nonsense, why care what she thinks?
/r/seduction07/07/26 07:44 AM
2

Good for you. Too many guys drag out “I saw you and thought you were cute” or “I like your style” for no other reason than as an icebreaker when they aren’t particularly impressed by the girl’s looks or style. There’s one “coach” who does that habitually and it’s almost as if he could see a woman in a potato sack and he’d say, “I saw you and liked your style.”
/r/seduction07/07/26 07:41 AM
4

So, essentially you’re asking people you know nothing about to give you a hack to quiet the mind’s chattering: a skill Buddhist monks practice years to obtain. They aspire to this for the end of enlightenment. You want to still the mind’s static to fuck women. That is so Mark Manson.
/r/seduction07/07/26 12:27 AM
8

Looking for entertainment purposes is not very harmful; giving serious consideration to 99% of the advice offered in this sub is a form of masochism.
/r/seduction06/07/26 11:34 PM
2

Do you realize that not everyone you find beautiful thinks they are beautiful—or that they may, at that moment, need someone to give them ANY kind of courteous, non-threatening validation? Would you be surprised to learn that women receive the vast majority of their validation from friends, family, and female peers—or that even beautiful women can experience a “compliment drought” and go for weeks without being complimented because people think they are always being complimented? Mandates to avo…
/r/seduction06/07/26 11:22 PM
-6

"A girlfriend is more expensive than a prostitute after all." This is the most absurd rationalization by guys who choose to pay for sex--that in some way the meter is running with your girlfriend. Only someone who has become desperate could entertain such a ridiculous thought. You had a problem that was driving you to despair. You chose an extreme way to solve it. You're not the first; you won't be the last, but in no way is a hooker like a girlfriend who is devoted to you, and not to a guy for …
/r/seduction05/07/26 11:01 PM
1

As I read these gems of advice, it never ceases to amaze me that the obvious is ignored and the strategic embraced, the obvious being situation and context. Imagine you’re watching the tall ship parade from the South Street Seaport. You see a very attractive woman. Are you going to struggle for an opener or leverage the experience—a shared moment—something about the parade of ships or, in a pinch, a question about the predicted weather. Questions that can be answered “yes” or “no” are inadvisabl…
/r/seduction05/07/26 04:02 PM
1

There isn't any "data" I'm aware of, if by that you mean the kind that would verify certain other theories in social psychology--like the "halo effect". There are only claims, i.e., "I started becoming better at 'game' and now I have a girlfriend...or got laid...or have a FWB." The problem with these claims is that they can't be verified, but, more importantly, there are numerous claims that guys have tried "game" for a year or several without any results. In real science, if a claim is made, fo…
/r/seduction05/07/26 08:20 AM
1

Maybe, is right. There are times when rotten luck turns out to be a blessing—like missing a flight that crashes, and other times when good luck turns out to be a nightmare—like when you meet a beautiful girl who is a mule for the Columbian Cartel—and don’t tell me it can’t happen. I know better.
/r/seduction05/07/26 05:28 AM
1

That’s because no matter which self-proclaimed expert you follow you’re getting the same old wine in a new bottle—cheap wine, mass marketed to guys who are either 1) stunted in their relationships with women, 2) desperate guys looking for a quick fix to lifelong frustration, or 3)naive guys who believe the trickiest of human relationships (man/woman) can be solved by applying a few gimmicks. No one has figured out how to cure the common cold, and for damn sure no one has cracked the code of what…
/r/seduction04/07/26 11:17 PM
1

How does anyone miss the irony of that?
/r/seduction04/07/26 11:05 PM
1

Where or when? The “when” was about a week ago—subsequent to a reply I made to another guy. As to “where”, I have no idea where you were when you said something along the lines of, “Who are you trying to impress with that lie?.
/r/seduction04/07/26 10:44 PM
3

The fact is you are likely to be rejected before you get out of bed because the women you approach have their own criteria who they find attractive, and those preferences have been established long before you set eyes on them.
/r/seduction04/07/26 05:33 PM
8

You’ve homed in on the major issue with this self-proclaimed gurus: he is selling something while positioning himself as someone who possesses exceptional skill. I don’t see it. His attempts at conversation are awkward and the way he runs down women from behind and throws up his hands to interrupt where they are going is almost embarrassing. If he has one thing going for him it’s persistence but to what end? We never get a good look at his intended “victim” so we have no idea how attractive she …
/r/seduction04/07/26 05:20 PM
1

Nur für diejenigen, die Gabriel García Márquez’ “Die Liebe in den Zeiten der Cholera“ oder gar Casanovas”Memoiren“ nicht gelesen haben.
/r/seduction03/07/26 02:23 AM
1

The best books are the classics by great writers— not so-called pick-up artists who trot out ten-for-a-penny techniques they claim are based on science or psychology. Pablo Neruda and Gabriel Garcia Marquez can teach you more with one page of a poem or novel than Owen Cook could with fifth infields.
/r/seduction02/07/26 11:42 PM
5

You are a busy guy, and no doubt very persuasive: a girlfriend who doesn’t mind if you take out another woman on Valentine’s day before bouncing into bed with a third. That is grandmaster-level plate spinning.
/r/seduction02/07/26 09:14 PM
6

Generally speaking, you cannot say a certain attribute will appeal to all women, just as you cannot say there are feminine traits which appeal to all men.
/r/seduction02/07/26 09:03 PM
1

At the risk of seeming obvious, what works depends on the guy and the particular woman. I, unfortunately, experienced this first hand, as the cuckholded simp. I knew a girl (casually). It took almost two years before the stars aligned and we wound up in a hotel room together. Fast forward a year. She was approached outside a restaurant in Forest Hills by a U.S. Open tennis player while I was getting the car. He got her phone number on a Monday night, called on Friday afternoon about 4:00, came o…
/r/seduction02/07/26 02:20 PM
0

You actually took that seriously? No wonder 70% of the time women have no clue a guy is flirting. For what it’s worth, I would never lead with a trite comment about an item of clothing because it’s almost always just an icebreaker. Nine times out of 10 the guy could care less about the scarf. An item I’m genuinely curious about? Absolutely. You can only fake interest so long. “Excuse me. I’ve never seen an ankh like that. Where did you get it?”—-or, “Excuse me, I the baggage tag on your suitcase…
/r/seduction01/07/26 06:31 PM
1

As a general rule, what comes after the “opener” is more important than the opener. You can recover from one that falls flat, but if your subsequent conversation is as flat as a Kansas cornfield, even a clever opener won’t save you.
/r/seduction01/07/26 06:11 PM
1

The one I just used once was not technically an opener since that was some idle, pleasant chatter about an imminent snowstorm/blizzard. (“What’s the latest on the snow?”) That led to her telling me about growing up on Lake Erie and the horrors of lakefront snow. I really was with two friends who were across the room acting like two-thirds of the Three Stooges”. I said, “Yeah. They’re due for their meds. (pause). I’m thinking of having a small, little get together at Oscar Wilde’s to celebrate___…
/r/seduction01/07/26 06:07 PM
1

Be sure to add, “Meow” or “Woof!”
/r/seduction01/07/26 05:51 PM
1

It has become something between a twelve-step program and and a Monty Python sketch.
/r/seduction01/07/26 05:50 PM
4

DO NOT make eye contact something you have to manipulate. There’s a fine line between what is acceptable and potentially invasive. Most of us at some point have been asked, not cordially, “What are you looking at?”. One example: On a train, water was slowly, almost imperceptibly dripping from the ceiling on to the seat of a girl. I looked at it for about five seconds and got a sneering, “Take a picture.” Eye contact will naturally happen between people who are attracted to each other, even if th…
/r/seduction01/07/26 05:46 PM
4

I doubt your advice will be followed. It’s much easier for some to apply the same, dumb rule in every situation.
/r/seduction01/07/26 11:31 AM
4

And more common sense. That’s twice in 12 hours. It’s got to be a record.
/r/seduction01/07/26 11:29 AM
16

Hallelujah! A guy with common sense. I’m sure these other guys would refuse an IG if an SI swimsuit model offered it to yhem.
/r/seduction01/07/26 11:28 AM
3

There’s a great deal of lip service in this space given to an “abundance mentality”. Live long enough and you will discover life will provide you with “abundant opportunities”. Consequently, you don’t have to sweat out any one girl. If a girl only offers an IG number, take it graciously. Attempt to connect, and if it was a ploy, so what? Similarly, many guys liken dating to sales or job hunting. If you met a potential customer or client on an airplane and he or she offered you his Company’s I.G.…
/r/seduction01/07/26 11:23 AM
-7

There’s little to add to this other than it’s incredibly bad advice. At the top of the list, never walk up behind anyone and grab them. Your assumption that a woman will laugh this off is unfounded, and quite likely contaminated by your experience of it never biting you yet. Even married guys have been stunned when trying “a sneak attack”. Women are hardwired to recoil from being suddenly and unexpectedly grabbed from behind, since generally, a sudden, unseen approach is perceived as a potential…
/r/seduction30/06/26 11:00 PM
3

Absolutely, leave, but first apologize to both the women (and guys) for possibly getting in the way. Then, when home, give yourself five lashes with a willow branch, before putting on a hair shirt. And don’t let it happen again.
/r/seduction30/06/26 05:52 PM
1

That’s what I figured. You made it an aspect of your life. The O.P. suggested he was aware of guys who were approaching women as much as 17 hours a day (or eight or 12), and THEY were the ones that were “good at it”, which seems absurd on so many levels.
/r/seduction30/06/26 05:10 PM
2

Wise decision.
/r/seduction30/06/26 05:03 PM
1

O.K.
/r/seduction30/06/26 10:35 AM
1

Ask a reasonable question and get six clowns downvoting you.
/r/seduction30/06/26 10:21 AM
1

Because it’s nonsense.
/r/seduction30/06/26 10:11 AM
2

Of course it’s in your mind. You’ve created a shopping list of subjective assumptions: you’re this; she’s that, therefore she responds to you or she doesn’t. Above all is your completely counter-intuitive theory that if a girl is attracted to you, she will behave “coldly”. If you’re serious, ditch your rating system and base your actions on a simple verifiable thing: you’re attracted to her or you’re not, and if you are, cross your fingers, and hope she is attracted to you.
/r/seduction30/06/26 09:50 AM
2

The guy you’re debating has as an a priori that most women (99.9%) have swelled heads or delusions of grandeur. It follows, then, that he would default to the explanation that they are being rude simply because they are females. For reasons of his own, he does not consider that women being dismissive to this guy is not an isolated event but a common one. It may very well be there is something he is doing that is a bit off-putting. That happened to me a few times in life. It happens to many of us…
/r/seduction30/06/26 05:27 AM
3

Two facts: first, for many people (even if she only sees you as a friend today), in what I guess is your age group, most romantic relationships begin as friendships. Second, a girl’s perception of a guy’s attractiveness can increase in time as she gets to know the guy. So, if you are very interested in her, don’t cut and run because she’s not interested yet—despite what some will tell you about the dreaded friend zone. It’s interesting: even pundits like the much-ballyhooed “Mystery” consider th…
/r/seduction30/06/26 12:20 AM
1

How would you define “addicted”? Were you enslaved by your need to approach for 50, 80, or more than 100 hours a week? Did you have any control over it—or did it dictate how you spent your days and nights?
/r/seduction29/06/26 06:15 PM
1

You, too, don’t sound like someone “addicted” to approaching “8, 12, or 17” hours a day. As I recall, you work during the week, earn six figures, and reserve your efforts for weekends as a reward. This guy was asking for input from outliers who somehow live to approach, and who could not possibly attend to the necessities of life if they spent half their day approaching. He informed me he only wanted input from those who he would consider “addicted”. Again, that doesn’t sound like you.
/r/seduction29/06/26 06:10 PM
1

Would you describe yourself as “addicted”. Were you compelled to approach “8, 12, and 17 hours a day”, every day, or most days? It doesn’t appear so. “ u wake up again and approach whenever u feel like.” That suggests you have some control. The O.P. specifically used the word “addicted” which implies an almost complete lack of control and subserviance to the thing “addicted”.
/r/seduction29/06/26 06:00 PM
1

So, by your reasoning only hens should be able to recognize a rotten egg. And for what it’s worth, there was no more an appeal to “moral authority” in my comment than there would have been if a doctor responded to a guy who wanted to know, for purposes of emulation, how some guys put away a fifth of Jim Beam before lunch, and who said, “If you think that’s a good idea, you have a problem.” One more thing that should be obvious to anyone who has spent any time in this space. You don’t get to deci…
/r/seduction29/06/26 05:54 PM
1

If you want to emulate a guy who is spending 1/2 of his waking life running down women on the street or in malls—or wherever—you have serious issues. You might as well ask, “Those of you who play roulette all day, how did you become addicted to it? What do you feel when you walk up to the table?”
/r/seduction29/06/26 04:40 PM
4

That’s solid advice: kindness tempered with truth. She may not be aware of her tendency towards negativity. It could be a much-needed wake-up call.
/r/seduction29/06/26 05:30 AM
1

I remember Meg Ryan blowing up that “It’s not personal” B.S. You’re not telling his or her friend they don’t cut it. You’re telling them that in some way, they are. It doesn’t get more personal.
/r/seduction29/06/26 05:00 AM
2

I wonder who started this business about letting a woman (or anyone) down “easily”. There is no such self-serving way to do that, any more than if you like your job that your boss can find an easy way to say, “You’re fired.” It’s rejection. You’re being told you’re “sweet”, “a great guy”, “anyone would be lucky to be with you…”, but, You’re missing something. In some way you’re deficient. That’s what lands no matter how you try to make it go down easily.
/r/seduction29/06/26 04:38 AM
1

I’m in the process of slowly deleting my comments. At least 70%, even if I think they are helpful appear to be completely uninteresting. Another 10%-15% seem only mildly interesting or fodder for some young Turk with a copy of “Models” in one hand and “The Game” in the other to give me a tutorial on calibration or some other sacred cow. I’ve never been a player but I’ve learned a few things and it would be comical if it wasn’t so exasperating to be lectured by a 27-year-old who still wasn’t eati…
/r/seduction29/06/26 01:21 AM
3

This sub has confusing, almost arbitrary endorsement of rules at times. I’ve seen comments advocating sexual strangling stand while others get bounced with the only an explanation a rule has been violated. I think it only reasonable that if a comment or post is taken down that the specific reason be cited. That would be educational for the author of the breach.
/r/seduction29/06/26 01:03 AM
2

That's your possible problem, then. In many jurisdictions, probably most, if not all, implied consent is a complex issue. I don't know if the mods completely understand it, or if posts qre screened by a Reddit legal suit if someone reports a comment. In NYS, consent requires voluntary agreement, which means it's based on affirmative actions or behaviors. That seems pretty straightforward. A guy says, "Let's move into the back seat." The woman agrees. That's where the confusion begins, and things…
/r/seduction28/06/26 11:14 PM
1

You were begging to get downvoted with an opinion numerous "seducers" might find insulting even though they flirt with consent issues--serious issues which are common in this space. Such guys don't understand that there is a lack of consent in most jurisdictions if the woman even feels pressured to move forward. One of the most cited gurus in this area, Mark Manson, even went so far as saying, something along the lines of "everything is okay until she tells you to stop"—suggesting the absence of…
/r/seduction28/06/26 08:45 PM
1

Certainly, not some guy who refuses to make his comment history public. Your problem is one I had in many areas of my life: If I didn't think I could do something or experience something, I found it hard to believe someone else could. To you, whatever your situation is, it is unfathomable that a guy traveling at night on an almost empty bus, with his girlfriend of three years, could have such an unprecedented experience. That's somewhat sad. As I said, it indicates how impoverished your beliefs …
/r/seduction28/06/26 08:28 PM
3

Since several had the words "with consent" in them, I'd be interested in knowing what your definition of "consent" is. Not even Mark Manson gets that right.
/r/seduction28/06/26 08:07 PM
1

No, I don't see that, nor would you if you approached a woman, and before you could say a word, she put up her hand and said, "I'm sorry but you're not my type." Would you think she meant you were attractive? I doubt it.
/r/seduction28/06/26 07:53 PM
1

Exactly. Meditation is not for everyone. Nor is yoga, declaring Jesus as your savior, or getting laid, something to pursue four nights a week. In your case, I would suggest, if you can do it, examining the way your language reflects your world view. It's hardly likely you tried "all options", or that the options you have tried, have "sucked the life force out of you." I suppose by that you might be experiencing a mild mood disorder or even depression, perhaps borderline clinical, in which case t…
/r/seduction28/06/26 06:41 PM
0

How can you “promise” that with such a sense of authority? She could just as easily shut him down in two or three days as if he texted in an hour, and this is because the circumstances of such sex are more complicated than you apparently consider: Was this a “one-off” for her, or was she one of the rare women who have had many episodes of casual sex? What was her reason for engaging in it? Was she feeling bad about life and needed something to distract her? Was it purely for a quick hit of pleas…
/r/seduction28/06/26 05:43 PM
0

You need to stop meditating if the end result is confusion. Your efforts to meditate have resulted in what appears to be a pronounced Skinnerian, deterministic view of your world with elements of nihilism in it, and I wonder if you are meditating to solve some real-world issues you are having with both attraction and love.
/r/seduction28/06/26 05:16 PM
2

Even better if you have knowledge of India from a book, film, or other source, you could say something like, “When I saw ‘A Passage to India’, it seemed so mysterious, even otherworldly. As someone who lives there, how do you account for the impressions so many people have of your country?”
/r/seduction28/06/26 06:30 AM
2

Exactly. If you say, “So, what drew you to aerospace engineering?” and responds with, “Is it warm in here or is it just me?”, it would be bush-league to say, “Uh, don’t think so. How did you like MIT?” Better by far to say, “It might be. Hang tight. Let me find someone who can check that out.” If quotes are the lawyer’s substitute for an original thought, the approach interview is the alternative for boring guys to an interesting conversation.
/r/seduction28/06/26 06:25 AM
3

It seems, among other things, to tell a woman she's attractive even if she's not.
/r/seduction28/06/26 02:33 AM
0

So, basically, she was not your "type", that is, particularly attractive by your standards, and yet you told her you found her very attractive. And people wonder why women often look like they bit into a bad piece of fruit when they hear these war stories.
/r/seduction28/06/26 02:32 AM
6

It depends on what you're curious about. Too many people are after an autobiography. "So, where did you love before New York? Arizona. Cool. I've never been. O.K. However, "Arizona? What was it like growing up there?" Better. What's your favorite memory of living there?" Best.
/r/seduction28/06/26 02:25 AM
9

The environment, situation, and context, determine the conversation. If you're at a wake, you talk about big issues--"How did you come to know John or Bev?" or "I never know what to say to child eho lost their father." If it's at a Yankees game you can talk about how the season is going or how the new rookie brought up from Triple A is doing. It always seemed odd to me that if I saw a woman studying a Monet at the Met, that I should gear the conversation to something other than Monet, and yet so…
/r/seduction28/06/26 02:20 AM
1

You’re not so much intrigued as a bit put off. My original comment merely addressed quitting too soon. To that, you responded by calling such guys “pathetic losers”—“loser” being one of your terms for guys who, for whatever reason, don’t measure up to your standards of acceptable swagger. You not infrequently have labeled these men as “asinine”, delusional, and as another put down “inexperienced”—as you did with me, not having a clue about my life beyond Reddit. Then, to ice whatever point you’r…
/r/seduction27/06/26 11:04 PM
1

If one doesn’t possess a degree of charm (forget charsms) in-your-face “resistance” can be extremely offputting. Resistance in this case could be as simple as saying, “Why would any guy think spending time with you is time wasted?” As to her “gut feeling” about ling-term compatibility he could have said, “Have you ever had such a feeling that was wrong—like thinking someone was in trouble because they were late? Did you ever feel you did bad on a test. when you did quite well?” The real problem …
/r/seduction27/06/26 03:55 PM
2

Therefore “abundance” is a belief—a point of view—, nothing more, and like a belief it may or may not be true no matter how resolutely one believes it.
/r/seduction27/06/26 12:37 AM
0

That’s your problem. Why do you think super-players like Warren Beatty, Paul Newman, and Johnny Cash eventually went all-in on one woman? They discovered that commitment to one woman could be at least as fulfilling as having a “stable”. Even Mark Manson, Mystery, and Neil Strauss eventually caved.
/r/seduction27/06/26 12:31 AM
1

That was far too rational an opinion for this group of evangelical PUAs . In fact, your suggestion is similar to a technique developed by one of the 20th century’s great psychiatrists, Victor Frankl. That technique was paradoxical intention. While you weren’t o.k. with a particular problem, you invited it. A stutterer, for example would try to stutter. But what the hell did Frankl know compared to Eric Markovic or Neil Strauss? He’s just one of psychology’s legendary figures.
/r/seduction26/06/26 05:37 PM
1

Sound advice. Sometimes the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.
/r/seduction26/06/26 11:10 AM
9

Some years ago I met a sublimely beautiful Japanese woman in the Novatel Hotel in Times. She had moved to NYC to work for JAL. I had never fallen so quickly, so hard. It was wonderful. She asked if I lived in the city. I said, “Since my father died, as the only single one among my siblings, I was staying with my mother until she acclimated to being widowed.” She asked how long I thought that might be and I said, “There’s no timetable. As long as it takes, I suppose.” Surprisingly, she thought th…
/r/seduction26/06/26 05:14 AM
3

The only power one has in any situation is to take complete responsibility for one's situation. You were dealt a certain hand, but you've decided how to play those cards. You've chosen to invest heavily in social media and dating apps. No one twisted your arm and beat you over the head with the stump. And, yes: you can have everything going for you and still wind up with the short end of the stick--just as a non-smoker who eats right and is a gym rat can be diagnosed with lung cancer. Your probl…
/r/seduction25/06/26 08:06 PM
20

And they are frighteningly bad. “I noticed you were wearing black. You must be a secret agent on your way to kill someone… .” “I saw your hoodie and you looked like you were going to an audition for the lead role in a remake of ‘Eight Mile’ “…. “I saw the way you were strutting…very confident like a businesswomen who has hired a lot of people and fired a lot more… .” That could get you pepper sprayed in Chicago. In NYC you might be tasered.
/r/seduction25/06/26 04:59 PM
6

Gus, not surprisingly, like all PUAs, believes flirting is 1) absolutely essential to picking up girls (it’s not); and 2), women always know when you’re flirting. Wrong. They don’t. Dr. Gary Lewandowski, in an article in “Psychology Today” (“The Science of Flirting—Body language matters but laughter is absolutely essential) noted, “ Research finds that those being flirted with accurately perceived that the other person was interested only 28 percent of the time (Hall et al., 2014). In other word…
/r/seduction25/06/26 03:12 PM
3

You can do everything right, meet all expectations--even exceed some--and a woman's affection or interest can flame out without any discernible cause. I was in a 4-year relationship that was going strong in August and on life support in September, and to this day, I cannot tell you why. I will add this as one of the few absolutes I believe in: NEVER, NEVER, NEVER throw water on a woman's dreams. In this case, you pretty much said, "I don't want the life you do." That could have waited. I once wa…
/r/seduction25/06/26 05:30 AM
1

And why do you fear being looked at?
/r/seduction25/06/26 05:26 AM
2

A line will not remove your fear of being judged as some sort of predatory character.
/r/seduction25/06/26 02:19 AM
0

“but talking to a girl (no other reason but to fuck… .) There’s your problem. At some level, if others knew what was going on in your head it would be intolerable.
/r/seduction25/06/26 02:17 AM
1

It means he’s not 85.
/r/seduction24/06/26 03:47 AM
1

Live and learn. I was nine the last time I used a boner like a Geiger counter to estimate a girl’s interest. Her name was Maria Torres. I kissed her cheek uninvited and wound up standing in the corner. Boner’s can take you places you have no business being.
/r/seduction24/06/26 03:44 AM
0

I take a perverse pleasure in racking up “O” and “-“ votes. At times they’re deserved but in most cases they represent the flailing of guys who have been so indoctrinated into the cult of “game”, they no longer get when pursuit has become an ambush, or when assertion becomes an emotional assault. To push on with a girl who is displaying signs of acute distress is right out of Robert Green’s playbook, which is to say, depraved, and I don’t give a fuck who wants to make an attempt to justify such …
/r/seduction23/06/26 11:04 PM
-1

As disturbing as this guy’s get-the-number-at-any-cost approach is, the comments of those saluting him for his meager successes while ignoring that he frightened at least one girl is even more harrowing.
/r/seduction23/06/26 04:57 PM
-2

Is there any behavior a woman could exhibit that would cause you to cool your heels? If that woman was shivering for any other reason than being cold or feverish, she was probably having a panic attack, and giving you her number was an act of desperation as you were blocked. Did it even occur to you to ask if she was o.k.? And there are those who think “nice guys” are the ones with problems.
/r/seduction23/06/26 04:51 PM
1

You might begin by being more precise in your language: What are these “flaws” that repulse you? What do you mean “a bit of an issue” and who is it an issue for? Then, too, what do YOU mean by “connect intimately” and what things do you not want to “care about”? It appears, and I can only guess about this, that you use sex to self-medicate; that is, one of your not-really-a-relationship ends, there is some pain when this happens, and to blunt the pain you find another person to begin the cycle a…
/r/seduction23/06/26 10:03 AM
2

“I lose interest pretty fast after picking out flaws and getting the ick and it's become bit of an issue.” And that’s a “bit of a problem”? Don Juanism, being compelled to seek out the next conquest is one thing, you are experiencing a feeling of revulsion for a woman you have befriended, ostensibly for no other reason than to get laid. That this was not a one-off with a girl but a trend in which you begin “picking out flaws” in girls you found attractive enough to seduce. That’s not going to be…
/r/seduction22/06/26 10:08 PM
2

You don’t need a psychologist, you need an exorcist. You’re not possessed by this woman, but by the idea of this woman. Unless there is a legal entanglement you’ve not addressed, she cannot possibly “have you by the balls”. That icy grip you feel on your testicles is your own hand. To be free, you have to frame this as a metaphorical addiction and decide to go “cold turkey”. Move on and don’t look back. You can expect an average of three weeks of emotional turmoil while your brain’s neurochemica…
/r/seduction22/06/26 06:36 PM
1

It’s a good problem to have. Take care of yourself and when you’re 50 you could look thirty.
/r/seduction22/06/26 01:17 PM
0

For the same reason I enjoy watching videos about ill-fated attempts to climb Everest even though I believe those who try are pathologically self-absorbed thrill seekers who risk making their wives widows and their children fatherless just to have a great story to tell at the office. And for what it’s worth, I don’t have any problem with guys pursuing women. I do have a few with guys like you who trot out absurd ideas like you have to learn game and have sex with a lot of women to find the “righ…
/r/seduction22/06/26 07:05 AM
5

Thanks for the clarification.
/r/seduction22/06/26 06:20 AM
1

The bigger problem with “game” is its basic premise, which although it is now considered obsolete by current wannabe PUAs, began with Eric Markovic, aka “Mystery”, who made this outlandish claim: “If you follow the Mystery Method, as outlined in this book, you literally should be able to seduce any woman you meet… .” This promise is as off-the-wall as Maharishi’s claim that he could teach students “yogic flying”. Neil Strauss, in “The Game”, tells of how Mystery collected numbers during the week…
/r/seduction21/06/26 11:27 PM
1

I’m trying to follow this: there is a table and a tablecloth but no chairs?
/r/seduction21/06/26 08:16 PM
4

You forgot at the top of the list he put “low standard”.
/r/seduction21/06/26 08:05 PM
1

“Had you, for instance, approached her with a tie and shirt combo and said, “Excuse me, what’s your opinion of this tie? Too much?” That wasn’t the complete quote, was it? Then, too, not surprisingly you conflate “hitting on” with “flirting”, as if they are interchangeable. As to why I can give advice to this guy, the answer is simple but completely beyond your grasp: you don’t have to be a chicken to recognize a rotten egg. I don’t street race, does that disqualify me from telling the kid next …
/r/seduction21/06/26 09:36 AM
1

If he takes your sound advice, he’s likely not going to have a similar problem in the future. If it’s just validation that 5% of women are assholes, he’s not learned much that is valuable.
/r/seduction21/06/26 08:48 AM
1

Through sheer chance and due to no qualities of my own, I, also, have gone out with a few, and, as well, two state beauty queens. Model, or meter maid, I have consistently found beautiful women at least as nice as girls or women far less attractive, and as I examine my most unpleasant experiences with females, the most humiliating and painful have been at the hands of unattractive women.
/r/seduction21/06/26 08:42 AM
2

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but you deserve the truth: the other guy was simply more attractive to these two “random” girls. It happened and will happen again and again. There will be times when you may be the more attractive of the two and “physique” will have nothing to do with it. You might be funnier, more successful, or smarter. It’s life, nothing more.
/r/seduction21/06/26 06:05 AM
0

It’s already “got to him” or he wouldn’t be polling a jury to weigh in on the matter.
/r/seduction21/06/26 05:51 AM
2

Calm down. If, God forbid, the accusation was more serious and the police had to be called in, do you think they would stop at “tell me your side of things”? And, of course, some women have serious issues but some men also don’t tell the whole story—not that you are one of them.
/r/seduction21/06/26 05:49 AM
5

This may not be a popular take, but I feel the problem was not approaching the woman, per se, but resorting to a canned line, the intention of which, was likely telegraphed. Had you, for instance, approached her with a tie and shirt combo and said, “Excuse me, what’s your opinion of this tie? Too much?” It’s possible the result may have been the same but your “defense” would have been more iron-clad. As to the only alternative, “approach-or-die-alone”, that’s a bit extreme. There is a middle gro…
/r/seduction21/06/26 05:42 AM
1

Frankly, I never expected such an anemic response. “National surveys are not really applicable here?” So, if one suggests Gen Z is turning away from casual hookups in lieu of more “meaningful relationships” it doesn’t belong here because you deem it irrelevant? How convenient. If another suggests a massive decline in nightlife, and the ongoing cost-of-living crisis is resulting an epidemic of “dating app fatigue” it’s not pertinent in this space. It’s a cliche but you and those like you are the …
/r/seduction21/06/26 12:51 AM
1

That would be 133 degrees to the left and 146 to the right but only M-W-F between midnight and 4 a.m.
/r/seduction20/06/26 10:57 PM
0

“for most guys you gotta first fuck a lot of girls and have game before you can be confident enough to actually find the right girl.” More PUA nonsense. National surveys from the Institute for family studies indicate that the median number of premarital partners for both men and women generally hovers around 5 to 6. Specifically, 20% of men marry their first partner while another 35% have not had more than 2-4. In fact, only 22% of men have had more than 10. I am continuously amazed about how fa…
/r/seduction20/06/26 10:51 PM
6

That’s one of the most lucid observations I’ve witnessed in five years on reddit. “Toxic” is an overused word but it applies here. It’s a magnet for desperate guys whose sex life is impoverished, for those who are sex addicts but who claim to be “artists”, and for those who dispense God-awful advice, most often something they read or saw on YouTube. There is the occasional voice of reason (that is often downvoted). Your next epiphany may be that the whole concept of “game” is severely flawed and…
/r/seduction20/06/26 07:55 PM
2

I don’t know where this aversion to having a strong opinion came from. I don’t think you’d apologize for your take on “alley sex” if the guy said, “Good point. I never thought about it like that. The bottom line is sex in public places is an extremely bad idea on many levels. At the top of the list is that it’s a crime in many jurisdictions. Then, too, it can be a career killer if you are arrested, Some things merit being judgemental.
/r/seduction20/06/26 01:37 PM
3

Did you ever see "The Graduate"? Next time, if it happens again, just ask. That's all, "Are YOU trying to seduce me?" add, "I think it may be working." Again and again, self-proclaimed masters of pickup act as if asking what is going on in a woman's head is unnecessary. They assume they know. If you "froze" it was because you didn't know what was going on. Ask. "Want me to join you?" Kill anxiety with curiosity.
/r/seduction20/06/26 06:01 AM
2

"A whore is easy to meet."--Buddhist proverb
/r/seduction20/06/26 12:26 AM
3

I don't think an objective observer would think the right question is "What's up with this girl?" it's "What's up with this guy?" Curiously, you don't clarify one thing: what is the "and stuff" she's doing on your bed that puts your brain into "low-key freeze", whatever the hell that state is?
/r/seduction20/06/26 12:18 AM
10

Before I jump in to give advice based on a single comment by a guy, I’ll try to get a sense of the big picture. This means, if available, I’ll check out a few of his previous comments. Sometimes you discover something important (i.e., “I get it why the guy is so pissed. He’s being kicked out of his apartment, his girlfriend emptied his bank account for implants, and then ran off with her boss.”) You’ve had a rough couple of months made worse by major sleep problems due to shift work. Bad sleep a…
/r/seduction19/06/26 06:43 PM
5

Do I lie? All the time. Just yesterday I told a neighbor the first time I was given oral sex was on the Amtrak California Zephyr between Denver and Grand Junction. No. Not even close. It was on a Greyhound bus between Oswego and Rochester. I thought a train wound sound cooler. More Hercule Poirot, if you get my drift. I almost thought about claiming the moment was interrupted when the conductor said a guy was murdered, but I thought that would be pushing it. At the time, I was in my twenties. Th…
/r/seduction19/06/26 06:05 PM
-2

Being in the friendzone is not only not a curse, it may be your best and only chance to develop an intimate relationship with many women, as a study indicates. Whether it’s “The Game”, “Models”, “No More Mr. Nice Guy”, or “Double Your Dating”, if it’s written by a PUA, it almost certainly contains some really bad advice. “Game”, at its core, is not about becoming a “better version of yourself” or developing “social skills”, it’s about getting laid. If some guy wrote a book and promised, “You don…
/r/seduction19/06/26 10:56 AM
2

Here’s one: never compromise your admirable integrity. It’s rare and a breath of fresh air.’
/r/seduction19/06/26 10:43 AM
-1

Totally unnecessary.
/r/seduction19/06/26 10:37 AM
0

On behalf of the silent majority, thanks for the updates, but it’s unnecessary, really. I mean, really.
/r/seduction19/06/26 10:36 AM
43

Once you’re down for dragging a complete stranger into a stall in a public restroom, the utility closet of an abandoned building, or behind a dumpster, you can toss your copy of “Models”. You’ve arrived.
/r/seduction19/06/26 10:32 AM
0

Thank God! Just in the knick of time another PUA Jedi appears not only with otherworldly seduction knowledge but with the ability to read minds.
/r/seduction18/06/26 11:15 PM
1

Why would you press a woman to be friends with you after she said she was married? Is that some sort of "shit test" you're throwing at her--or are you thinking that puts your foot in the door? It's a curious tactic, since the "friendzone" is a place Gamers say is the domain of "simps". Then, too, how would you like it if some horn dog approached your wife, came home, and said, "Some guy wanted to pick me up, I said 'No' but agreed to be his friend'?
/r/seduction18/06/26 12:48 AM
1

The fact is that in the 30-35 age bracket, most women are married or in some form of relationship, which is why "cold approach" is so unpredictable.
/r/seduction18/06/26 12:41 AM
1

It has very little in common. If your basis for similarity is that in both you learn something from a previous failure, then “searching” for a girlfriend is not much different than learning to hit a golf ball or parallel park. As to the differences, the guy interviewing you for a job has no skin in the transaction. You either have that M.S. with three years experience in propulsion systems or you don’t. It’s not personal. It’s very personal when a woman doesn’t even acknowledge your existence. M…
/r/seduction17/06/26 06:10 PM
1

You must be more than a little insecure to consider setting the record straight “flexing”. Nonetheless, you’re good. You didn’t spend five minutes with any of THESE girls and yet you make such an absurd generalization. You seem like the blind guy who feels the trunk of an elephant and says, “I get it. An elephant is like a snake.” But, go ahead, Kreskin: tell me about the “many ways” models are not like “normal” girls. Are they impervious to loneliness, grief, and self-doubt? Are they different …
/r/seduction17/06/26 05:35 PM
1

I’m assuming the guy is in his 30s—at least—from his list of accomplishments. When I was younger I spent most of my free time playing the drums. I haven’t held a stick in my hand for decades. Life and responsibilities have a way of getting in the way, don’t they? We move on. I’m old school. I think, whether it’s drumming, playing video games, or chasing women, the overwhelming majority of obsessions are unhealthy because there’s an element of compulsivity driving the obsession: “I want to play c…
/r/seduction17/06/26 12:29 PM
3

The math is solid. Start with 168 hours a week—or 72 Friday through Sunday. The point is, one only has so many free hours to do anything. As it stands, I’ve probably been conservative with the hours given to sleep, eating, basic necessities, grooming, etc. You can do it a different way: zero hours of the 96, Monday to Thursday and 21 of the less than 40 waking hours not spent on sleeping, eating, etc from Friday through Sunday. I don’t see what the problem is: I concluded you were obsessed, you …
/r/seduction17/06/26 12:16 PM
17

If he sleeps 49 hours a week, prepares 7 hours a week to go out, 14 hours a week eating, and 7 hours doing routine chores, that’s 77 hours. Of his remaining time 91 hours of weekly time (168-77), if he works even part time (20 hours), he is allocating almost 30% of his waking time—20 minutes of each hour chasing women. If he works full time, he is investing 60% of his awake/non-working time chasing women, and you think that’s dedication? It’s obsession.
/r/seduction17/06/26 06:20 AM
2

I see. Average women believing they are exceptional. How does that differ from the average guy strutting around believing he is “the prize”?
/r/seduction16/06/26 10:18 PM
1

That wasn’t the cause of their quite-normal issues. Most commonly, it was the understanding that they had a very short shelf life as models and that the Greta Scacchis of the profession were outliers. To complicate matters, the competition was brutal.
/r/seduction16/06/26 10:15 PM
2

Eye contact is vastly overrated as a sign of interest. It could mean curiosity, apprehension, or even hostility. As just one example, eye contact from a latino girl may signal interest, while the avoidance of eye contact by an Asian woman may indicate attraction. Even simple touching is not a sure sign of interest or attraction. My great epiphany was realizing—and this may seem morbid—was that prince or pauper, beauty or beast, millionaire or miser, we were all in the same boat. We were inevitab…
/r/seduction16/06/26 08:49 PM
1

And vice versa.
/r/seduction16/06/26 08:14 PM
1

The voice of reason. Well done.
/r/seduction16/06/26 08:13 PM
4

Another B.S. rant. A friend once asked me to coach NYC models on monologues. I worked with somewhere between 10 and 15 and they certainly didn’t “live for this shit”. As a group they were little different than other girls, with one exception: they were more insecure about their long-term position on the food chain.
/r/seduction16/06/26 08:12 PM
7

Never? Nonsense. It’s happened to me and numerous other guys I know. Of course, your 10 may be my six and versa.
/r/seduction16/06/26 08:07 PM
1

Start by defining your terms: what skills are “social”. Then think about the assumptions you’re making about them. For instance, perhaps you believe, as many do, that a sense of humor and “flirting” skills are essential—or being a sparkling conversationalist, but are they really? It’s amazing how many of our assumptions don’t hold up when examined.
/r/seduction16/06/26 08:03 PM
-2

Your first problem is framing a question like “You probably go on a lot of dates” as some sort of game playing rather than a request for information, i.e., “Do you date a lot?” It’s pretty much the same with, “Oh, is that your other girl” and “That was probably one of your other girls”. Both can be easily answered with, “I’m curious. What makes you think that?” The major drawback of seeing simple requests for information as a test is that the encounter is seen as something adversarial. Why is it…
/r/seduction16/06/26 07:04 PM
-1

And yet another, “Most men… .”
/r/seduction16/06/26 03:59 AM
1

So, “game” to you is basically what guys with half a clue have bern doing for hundreds of years.
/r/seduction16/06/26 03:56 AM
1

I was being sarcastic. But if I understand you, you're suggesting that desperate guys frequent hookers who drive the price up. Is that it?
/r/seduction16/06/26 01:51 AM
2

Yeah, where do they get off making rules about the kind of sex they allow? Who do those hookers think they are?
/r/seduction16/06/26 12:06 AM
1

If you have $2,500 for startup costs (a videographer for a few hours and five or six models ) you can look like the Son of Casanova.
/r/seduction15/06/26 11:37 PM
1

Those who can’t, teach. And those who can’t teach, teach pickup. Kudos for speaking up. Like scientologists who quit, it takes balls to admit when one has been conned or played. Say a prayer for the desperate who think Game is a harmless game.
/r/seduction15/06/26 11:35 PM
-1

Did you really believe employing the disclaimer of “unpopular opinion” would mitigate how pathetic this is. What’s next: going to a burn center to learn game?
/r/seduction15/06/26 09:18 PM
-1

Last time: there is no difference in MAKING friends with a man or woman is no different. The maintenance of the friendship could be. I’ve now given you five ways to start correcting course and it doesn’t seem like you’ve looked into any. I’ve no more suggestions. Good luck.
/r/seduction15/06/26 02:51 PM
1

There is no difference between creating a friendship with a man or woman. I have had at least twenty female friends in my life and the process was the same for both. Why don’t you start with Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People” and “Influence” by Robert Caldini? They’ve helped millions.
/r/seduction15/06/26 09:12 AM
-1

Let’s start at the beginning: my response was directed at “Sales Afficianado” and his “My God, what a load of bullshit” comment, not yours, which until a minute ago I hadn’t read, and which I agree with. I can see where Reddit’s unnecessarily confusing schematic for replies would have caused you to think I was replying to your comment and why you would take offense at my feelings about those who hide past comments. However, free to look at my past comments and if you have a hint of honesty in yo…
/r/seduction15/06/26 08:49 AM
0

Not unless, “My God, what a load of bullshit” is your comment. I never read yours.
/r/seduction15/06/26 08:32 AM
0

Yes. There are numerous books on identifying the cognitive distortions we all carry around. Even in the last comment you displayed one: “eliminating the positive”. I mentioned you must have some social skills to have friends, and you basically said, “That doesn’t count.” Then, too, you admit that women offer friendship, which I’m presuming you consider a slap in the face. Did you know that almost 70% of intimate (sexual) relationships between people between 18-30 begin as friendships? Then, too,…
/r/seduction15/06/26 03:36 AM
2

It’s nothing like that. Surrendering to the fact that a particular woman isn’t in the cards for you is a far less concession than seeing a couple, and despite knowing you long for such a connection, I’ll be happy knowing that guy can never be me.
/r/seduction15/06/26 12:57 AM
-1

Enough already. On what authority do you presume to speak for everyone? No more than I have to speak for every guy, or to presume that a woman who persists in trying to attract a specific man lacks self respect.
/r/seduction15/06/26 12:52 AM
2

Some unsolicited advice which I give but often fail to take: don’t waste time on chickenshits who refuse to make their comments public. What are they hiding or refuse to own?
/r/seduction15/06/26 12:47 AM
2

Consider yourself lucky. I can show you one person who made in multi-level marketing and 99 who failed miserably.
/r/seduction14/06/26 11:38 PM
3

…and cringeworthy.
/r/seduction14/06/26 11:35 PM
1

It’s more important at the outset to avoid resources that are extreme—like “The Game”, “The Mystery Method”, and “The Venusian Arts”. No one tells you the icon whose teachings are advocated in these books wound up severely depressed, suicidal, and in need of emergency admission to a mental health facility for severe depression at 33—a mere four to five years after he became “Mystery”; nor are you told the chronicler of his exploits, Neil Strauss entered a program for sex addiction, or that anoth…
/r/seduction14/06/26 11:34 PM
0

This is s go/to tool in cognitive therapy. It’s a list of the ways our thoughts are distorted—and, yes, it is a cut-and-paste. It will help you see some of the way your mind is filtering perceptions and like a funhouse mirror, giving you a distorted view of the world. All-or-Nothing Thinking: Viewing situations in absolute, black-and-white categories without any middle ground (e.g., "If I don't get this perfectly, I'm a complete failure".) Overgeneralization: Taking a single negative event and v…
/r/seduction14/06/26 11:10 PM
2

You won’t find the answer to your problem here, although one is very evident: you seemingly have adapted a style of describing your experiences in overblown, catastrophic terms. You’re not merely unattractive to women, they are “completely repulsed” by something about you. You’ve not tried asking for help many times, you’ve asked “a million times”. You don’t often get advice on Reddit that you believe is of little or no use to you, it is “always” useless, and not just useless, but “bullshit” adv…
/r/seduction14/06/26 07:57 PM
3

Keep in mind these videos will likely be cherrypicked to show success, even if a guy’s success rate is 1%. That’s not an exaggeration: some guy dolling out advice on approaching claimed he made 800 approaches to get “three lays”. Many can’t even claim that and they’ve watched infield videos until their eyes were crossed.
/r/seduction14/06/26 07:36 PM
0

Here’s a little secret: flirting is vastly overrated. It’s only one element of conversation that can kindle attraction or desire. Another secret you won’t read about in “The Game”, “Models” or hear about in a Owen Cook rant: humans are especially bad at recognizing flirting. Studies indicate that flirting goes completely undetected about 75% of the time, with only 36% of men and 18% of women correctly identifying when someone is flirting with them. Think about that. The odds are heavily against …
/r/seduction14/06/26 11:40 AM
1

That's a fairly clever way to mask what seduction is, as exemplified by the pioneers — Mystery, Neil Strauss, Ross Jeffries, etc. "Seduction" is a process of strategies, some purely manipulative, that will result not in a girl experiencing something novel or unexpected, but the man experiencing (perhaps again or for the first time) sex with a woman HE finds desirable. He creates comfort, not for her sake, but to grease the wheels of compliance; he touches her, oftern covertly, not for her pleasu…
/r/seduction14/06/26 11:02 AM
2

I mean exactly what "many" means: not "all", "not most", or a majority--"many", a large number; as in I have many DVDs that have become scratched and unplayable.” Many of these woman have some sort of trauma in their past that has made them financially morbidly dependent." Not all, many. Is that not clear enough? It does not excuse them or justify their dependency. It may explain it. And for what it's worth, ask him. I have no idea what he believes.
/r/seduction14/06/26 12:34 AM
-1

The thing is, I believe many of these women are essentially decent people, but being in a financial sinkhole does something to them emotionally-- very much like what happened to Scarlet O'hara in "Gone With the Wind". After the civil war destroyed her life of coquettish privilege, she changed from a garden-variety terminal flirt into a woman who would beg, borrow, steal, or kill to "never be hungry again".
/r/seduction14/06/26 12:13 AM
1

He's getting diabolically fucked. It just hasn't really occurred to him that he has become the victim of a very sneaky form of abuse. I would call it, at this point, financial sodomy.
/r/seduction14/06/26 12:07 AM
1

Even if you do love her, her morbid dependency on you will almost certainly lead you to resenting her, if not hating her, unless money is no object to you. Let me say that again: there is a very strong possibility your love will turn to contempt. Worse, it may kill whatever charitable feelings you have in you. This is not theory. I've lived it. And no matter how much I tried, I could not stop feeling escalating anger for her bottomless need for my financial assistance. My advice would be as foll…
/r/seduction14/06/26 12:04 AM
2

The massage line is so old, it has a beard. Adam probably used it on Eve. I can imagine a woman thinking, "That's it. That's the best he has? What is he sixteen?"
/r/seduction13/06/26 11:37 PM
7

Given certain circumstances, it can be "built", insofar as research has shown repeated exposure can increase attractiveness. Then, too, at other times, it is there immediately, i.e, Romeo and Juliet, Richard Burton and Liz Taylor. So, while "liking" is not "lusting" it certainly can become that, and in those cases when it does, in my opinion, it makes for the best sex by far, more than likely, because it's been a slow burn that suddenly ignites into a five-alarm fire.
/r/seduction13/06/26 07:57 PM
2

And 51 totally clueless guys gave this sage advice a thumbs up. Is there any question why so many guys are 30 and have never been kissed.
/r/seduction13/06/26 07:10 AM
4

This may be the most bizarre “real time” comment I’ve ever read but if you must have a second opinion, ask her. Then, too, consider the situation; “We’ve been drinking...we don't usually flirt, but right now she is cuddling up against me” Can you not see the possible connection between those two facts?
/r/seduction13/06/26 07:04 AM
2

Sleeping with a ton of women in no way supports Robin Baker’s almost universally discredited theories. It should be obvious that in the twenty-first century getting lots of girls pregnant is not an attractive trait for numerous reasons, among them that certain negative qualities could be passed on, i.e., Sickle-cell anemia, Downs Syndrome, etc. It baffles me that anyone could buy into such nonsense. And, of course, the argument is ultimately based on an extreme, with the sexual profligate being …
/r/seduction12/06/26 08:47 PM
6

If you were so candidly discussing sex, why the cute little wink-wink emoticon? It makes you come off like a kid, which you may be. More obviously, you’re motto is a clear end run to set her up for the next step. You really don’t care about how hard she worked or how stressed she was The massage nonsense was a rung on your “escalation ladder” and she sniffed it out. The “massage” offer is so old it has a beard.
/r/seduction12/06/26 08:32 PM
1

When I was in grad school I fell in with some fundamentalists. The mindset I see with 90% of those commenting on this sub is similarly evangelical. They have had a come-to-Jesus moment and whether it’s Eric Markovik, Neill Strauss, or Mark Manson they act as if these guys came down from the mountaintop carrying tablets of holy writ. That kind of blind allegiance to a guru does not have room for “other interpretations”, partiicularly ones that are diametrically opposed to their most cherished ten…
/r/seduction12/06/26 09:48 AM
2

On paper, it might be sound advice. In practice, maybe not. Do you really need to tick off another 10 boxes? Control your breathing Move Slower Talk Slower Don’t “square off” Don’t hyper-focus on her Use a “bladed stance” Find the Goldilocks Zone for eye contact. Don’t ask too many questions Only chat for a minute or two. Look for IOIs. Before the anal-retentiveness of “The Mystery Method” with its cumbersome micromanagement, do you think every successful approach required such hyper-vigilance? …
/r/seduction12/06/26 03:46 AM
1

You made it unnecessarily deep by making a frivolous claim that “shit tests” are biological. I stated the obvious: sometimes women simply want information, or more likely, they just don’t find a guy appealing. Furthermore, I’d bet the rent you’re one of those guys who live by the “women-say-one-thing-but-mean-another mantra. Very little can be taken at face value: “I’m really not into the rough stuff” is code for “Make me bark like a dog, Daddy.” How’s that working for you? And, for what’s worth…
/r/seduction12/06/26 12:06 AM
1

That’s an extraordinary claim. Prove it. Show me the “biology”. Show me a girl who says, “I’m not sure I want to go back to your place” is testing the man as opposed to voicing a fear she might have based on what she may have experienced in the past, heard about, or read about. You can’t provide such evidence because it doesn’t exist. Where are these mechanisms located in the brain? If you ever had to slough through a soul deadening year of “History and Systems of Psychology”, you’d know that th…
/r/seduction11/06/26 10:31 PM
1

Do you mean the word “but” exclusively, or about syntax generally? It would help if you gave a few specific examples of the wording you believe are self-sabotaging.
/r/seduction11/06/26 10:09 PM
1

Yes. Forget about the first clause about her weight, even though both are subjective. The bottom line remains the same: "shit tests" are generally fictions, conceived of by guys with major issues whose perceptions are heavily skewed by their compulsive need for sex.
/r/seduction11/06/26 09:08 PM
1

The impact of the word “but” comes from the positioning of the clauses before and after it. Consider these two statements (purely hypotheticals): “I’ve met Miss Galoldriel. She’s incredibly sexy but on the heavy side.” As opposed to, “I’ve met Miss Galoldriel. She’s on the heavy side but incredibly sexy.” The same info but placed differently. And the difference is pronounced. Which would you rather hear said of you?
/r/seduction11/06/26 07:55 PM
2

Thanks. I think so. My advice routinely flies in the face of the bullshit, misogynist dogma that was popularized by a guy, two actually, who were sex addicts—one of which became suicidal, and the other whose profligate ways resulted in a divorce and his admission into a facility for his out-of-control compulsiveness. Imagine being 25, 30, or perhaps even 40. You’ve never been kissed or even held a girl’s hand. You’re desperate, despondent, and worse of all, lonely. You stumble into a Barnes and …
/r/seduction11/06/26 05:39 PM
1

You nailed it. This guy once bragged how he came home from work sick—feverish. Instead of doing the reasonable and responsible thing, to lie low, he went out to hunt women. Keep in mind, COVID still kills as does pneumonia and the flu. It may not put an otherwise healthy thirty-year-old at risk, but that person can infect a fragile elderly person or an immune compromised young person. When I heard him gloating about his determination to not let a likely bacterial or viral infection make him miss…
/r/seduction11/06/26 05:10 PM
2

That’s pretty decent advice but predictably one that will irritate aspiring PUAs who think women play the same games they do. (A woman has never negged me, attempted to stealthily escalate, or tried the incredibly dumb “false time constraint” move. Nor has one ever employed a “winggirl”, given me the cube test, carried a piece of lint around to place on my suit coat, or asked me if I wanted to go back to her place to see her tropical fish. On the contrary, they have been almost brazen in their d…
/r/seduction11/06/26 10:17 AM
1

Only if you’re up to your eyeballs in Game theory. Are you familiar with Freud’s observation that “sometimes a cigar is just a cigar”? Sometimes a request for information, i.,le., “When did I suggest if I came over to watch a movie I’d sleep with you?”, is just that—except for PUAs. Ordinary interactions are seen as adversarial mind games, manipulative traps to test a man’s masculinity. Bullshit. “Shit tests”, Bitch Shields—just fictions created by PUA pioneers who were far from poster boys for …
/r/seduction11/06/26 09:59 AM
-2

Why do you need to assume it's a test? If she is undecided about you, a cute comeback isn't likely to change her mind and could make her more uncertain. Just answer her question honestly. "It was just a feeling I had. Maybe I misread the situation."
/r/seduction11/06/26 08:31 AM
2

I suppose it was a heads up to be wary about guys who compare their dating proclivity to the achievements of one of the greatest athletes of the past 100 years. I’ve met a few “masters” and “grandmasters” in my life—martial artists, pilots, etc. You’d never know who they were. They never talk about the enemies they’ve conquered or the airplanes they shot down.
/r/seduction11/06/26 01:27 AM
1

You’d be surprised why people would embellish their credentials, expertise, and sexual adventures, particularly if they deem themselves a “dating coach”. But, if you want to take this guy’s war stories, who am I to try to stop you?
/r/seduction11/06/26 01:08 AM
1

As a general rule, do you blindly believe any fish story an anonymous person on Reddit tells? For example, what if I said (and this didn’t happen and it’s not about a “date”, per se) “I met this hot chick in a Container Store. I delivered shit for them. I delivered stuff to this woman who said her favorite fantasy was giving oral sex to a complete stranger, in the back of a van, beneath the Williamsburg Bridge. I asked if the Queensborough would be just as good. She said, “Maybe better.” Can’t s…
/r/seduction10/06/26 09:12 PM
1

Here’s a stat—maybe the word “trend” is better—I’ve noticed: Talk to a hundred guys who blow smoke about how super special they are in some respect and you’re lucky to find two who are within a time zone of living the life they brag about.
/r/seduction10/06/26 08:40 PM
2

I would suggest he play to his strengths. Not everyone flirts masterfully or is funny, just as not everyone is poetic or thoughtful. Maybe he's super perceptive. Perhaps he is a great listener. I would tell him the flirting business is much overrated, and while it can't hurt, the science says humans are really bad at detecting when we are being flirted with. In fact, research at the University of Kansas revealed that when females observed males attempting to flirt, they identified flirting just …
/r/seduction10/06/26 12:10 PM
2

There is no proof that you are the stallion you claim to be. Zero. And even if your body count is 500, there's no proof another guy would look twice at those you think are the gold standard.
/r/seduction10/06/26 08:25 AM
3

And I thought I was the only one who thought the O.P. needed to tweak his Thorazine. Maybe that's a bit harsh, but his ideas are so wildly extreme, so marinated in his almost fetishistic focus on "asses and tits", he comes across a bit off. What rational human being can believe his (or her) preferences are the gold standard?
/r/seduction10/06/26 08:20 AM
3

"The problem is that, even though I love her, I can't help but start talking to other girls and try to initiate something else." It doesn't matter if no one had this problem, one other guy did, or five thousand. You have got a problem much more concerning than being "hooked on female validation". You're leading a double life: one you present to your "innocent angel" girlfriend and another that she doesn't know about--one that would likely shatter her if she knew about it, and one that you sugges…
/r/seduction10/06/26 08:08 AM
2

No one has ever, even remotely, said, "You remind me of (Craig Ferguson or Johnny Carson, Dave Letterman, Norm Macdonald). I would no sooner try to emulate either of those than I would try to dance like Fred Astaire or do a monologue like Spalding Grey. I'm a firm believer in Emerson's warning that "imitation is suicide".
/r/seduction10/06/26 07:12 AM
1

I’m cynical. I believe someone who knocks a woman with an exceptionally beautiful face because she doesn’t have a “C” or “D” cup quite likely hasn’t been with a woman whose face literally takes your breath away.
/r/seduction10/06/26 05:08 AM
2

I can tell you immediately: I don’t think I missed 10 episodes during the decade he had his show, and, no, I didn’t start talking with a Scottish brogue. I didn’t start slouching in my chair while I mimed smoking a pipe. I didn’t try to mimic his facial expressions or buy a coiled rattlesnake coffee mug. And the reason I didn’t is for the reason I suggested: Ferguson or Sinatra, Rodney Dangerfield or Tom Hanks, those icons are inimical. They are no less geniuses in their art than Richard Feynman…
/r/seduction10/06/26 05:05 AM
2

Let me make it simple: Craig Ferguson is, among other things, an exceptional writer, a master of improv and observational comedy who has decades of experience interviewing guests. The “perfect poise, energy, delivery and body language” you covet is the result hundreds of thousands of hours honing his craft. Neither you or I could do what he does any more than someone who thought he could just watch Sinatra concerts and pull off singing “My Way”, or watch Norm Macdonald tell his pig joke thinking…
/r/seduction10/06/26 12:59 AM
1

You do understand that these shows have “set-ups” for their guests; that is, Johnny Carson, as an example, was the first to require guests to engage in a demanding screening process, in which each had five numerous anecdotes they could share to insure “flowing” conversations. There was a “pre-interview” in which the stories were smoked out and put on index cards that Carson had in front of him. Certain topics were off-limit—messy divorces, arrests, personal failures, etc. Guests were also rigoro…
/r/seduction09/06/26 08:01 PM
1

Good start but I would suggest, if it’s not, stick with classics. Many women love Jane Austin (“Pride and Prefudice”, etc.) You asked about a film. I’m a big fan of “Il Postino”. It’s about a shy man, Mario, who meets the famous poet, Pablo Neruda, who teaches him how to communicate poetically. Then there’s “Zorba the Greek” that’s just about living. Not thinking. Living a life of gusto. Another favorite is “Kon Tiki”, and, of course, the book (70 million copies worldwide) it’s based on. Sometim…
/r/seduction09/06/26 05:52 AM
1

“Fancy words”? No. Not necessarily. Just avoid the cliches. I much prefer asking questions but only if I’m genuinely interested. For instance, I once saw a girl in a Vitamin Shoppe who had a particular supplement in her hand. She was the third person in a few days who I saw buying it. I said, “Excuse me, that is so popular these days. What’s the story on it?” That led to her asking me about a supplement I was buying. Before long she was agreeing to go with me to a store that had Indian and Tibet…
/r/seduction09/06/26 05:23 AM
2

Yes, you’re on to something there: words. The solution to that requires time. Read great literature, the classics. Great poetry and the letters of great men and women. Slowly, their words will become yours as will some of their ability to evoke emotion.
/r/seduction08/06/26 10:20 PM
2

As I said, the data is limited on how compliments are generally received because there are man variables. Nonetheless, a survey of 2,000 women by Talker Research revealed compliments about intelligence, a sense of humor, and being a good mother outranked those about physical qualities. More from the survey: “Women, from the time they are babies, are conditioned to respond to comments about their appearance. It might not be done maliciously, but only receiving compliments about physical traits th…
/r/seduction08/06/26 10:17 PM
1

Each to his own, I guess. In my own situation, IG wasn’t a popular dating platform or an option. More importantly, if a girl/woman balked at giving me her number, I politely said, “In that case, I’ll pass. I’m old school but I understand your hesitancy: thirty minutes ago you didn’t know I existed. But you do know the uncertainty thing cuts both ways. You could turn out to be the answer to my dreams or the reason I sleep with the lights on. So, here. If you change your mind, that’s my number. Me…
/r/seduction08/06/26 08:38 PM
2

How is it no one got the joke?
/r/seduction08/06/26 08:16 PM
1

Phone numbers are almost essential AFTER you nail down the date.
/r/seduction08/06/26 08:14 PM
0

“During daygame you almost always distract a woman from something.” This is an exceptionally prescient observation. I wonder how many “seducers” have considered that approaching a stranger on the street, or at the beach, or in many other places is “unnatural”, in the sense that it’s not like seeing a woman you went to college with at a reunion and saying, “You look great!” The meager research there is on “unsolicited compliments” suggest women’s reactions are ambivalent, ranging from indifferenc…
/r/seduction08/06/26 08:12 PM
1

In your case, I wouldn't necessarily go that route since "being yourself" meant bowing at the altar of one self-anointed PUA or another. It also means you don't refute opposing beliefs point by point, you do an end-run around them with sound-bites. To cite one example, you flat-out said, "It’s really the tone of voice and energy more than the content." This erroneous belief pops up in just about every aspiring PUA's toolkit, even though it was refuted years ago: It was Albert Mehrabian who came …
/r/seduction07/06/26 10:59 PM
0

I never had to “break rapport” as some cheesy gimmick to build attraction—as if passive aggressiveness is a winning strategy. Nor did I have to consciously manipulate my voice to forge a connection. Not that you’re interested, but neither did I have any need for negs, push-pull, maintaining a frame, dominating a frame, calibration, conscious, contrived, stealthy “escalation”, and above all the countless deceits that are the essence of game: pretending I have to be some place when I don’t (false …
/r/seduction07/06/26 09:39 PM
-1

More bad advice. The idea that one’s tone of voice carries more weight than content is parroted by guys like you who still buy into retracted, discredited research done by Albert Merhabian more than 60 years ago.
/r/seduction07/06/26 08:28 PM
-1

I don’t know who these guys are that sell the “breaking rapport” nonsense, but it’s just that. A little common sense is in order. ( I wish I could make this simple but sometimes one line of bullshit takes a chapter to refute. It’s five minute read that could spare you hours of regret.) To begin with, what is “rapport”? We know what its elements are: trust—a sense of safety and reliability; being on “common ground” with another, and getting a sense of who they are. Empathy: “I’m so sorry. I lost …
/r/seduction07/06/26 08:25 PM
1

To you it may be “practice”; to them it’s the opening move of someone trying to get in their pants, a gesture made uninvited and often, unwelcome. That happened to me just once when I said, “No more”. I decided to approach a girl (or initiate conversation) only if she had shown some signs my insinuation in her life would not be an intrusion. Just one example should suffice: Years ago I was in the Met Museum and ambled over to a Monet just as an attractive woman converged on the painting from a d…
/r/seduction07/06/26 07:19 PM
1

You’re right, of course. Content is everything in texting. This guy’s fatal mistake, as I see it, was carrying over something that might have worked face-to-face (although I doubt it) into texting. Then, again, I’m a firm believer that you ask for the date during the first encounter, snag her phone number, not an IG, set up a tentative time, and then call to confirm and engage in some idle, comforting chatter. To me, just procuring an IG accomplishes little. If she is attracted to you sufficient…
/r/seduction07/06/26 10:46 AM
9

It’s so predictable. You give sound advice and someone downvotes it. “I was so smooth.” Yeah, until crunch time and then he tried to be too slick by half. His “Wear something you know I like” is a ridiculously tone deaf comment. Among other things it’s suggesting the girl should dress for him and, worse, she has to be told to dress a certain way. I bet she never heard anything close to that in her life. There is no way to say that without it sounding offensive.
/r/seduction07/06/26 05:18 AM
1

“I still get constantly hit on, flirted with and seduced. Such is life!” What does that mean—women lure you into their beds?
/r/seduction07/06/26 03:47 AM
2

You dominated yourself right out of a very sweet spot to be in.
/r/seduction07/06/26 03:42 AM
6

Another casualty of two PUA tenets applied IRL. First, teasing/flirting is potentially a dealbreaker if you don’t know someone very well. There is a body of research that suggests we (humans) are pretty bad at recognizing flirting. “Wear something that you know I’ll like.” “uhh what’s that mean?” That must have left a mark. The second maxim of PUA that is a fiction is that “It doesn’t matter what you say, it’s how you say it.” “I don’t want to be a stepfather over text.” (Subtext, jokingly or no…
/r/seduction07/06/26 03:40 AM
2

The only real matter of importance is your happiness and living a life you can look back at with few regrets.
/r/seduction07/06/26 03:06 AM
2

Thanks for the answers.
/r/seduction07/06/26 02:57 AM
1

Thank you, for responding in such a measured fashion. Four questions: What are the metrics of the results upon which you base your superiority? What is the experience you refer to? What constitutes “this majority”, in your not so humble opinion. …and a few considerations: The overwhelming majority of people in the meta study (three combined studies) were NOT initially attracted to each other romantically. It is an established fact that familiarity can make someone appear more attractive. It is c…
/r/seduction07/06/26 12:52 AM
1

Everything can work, while in some circumstances, nothing will. The guy who unloaded on the O.P. was demeaning as shit. The question is why. What drew him out if his lair? Why would he suggest the O.P. is weak, submissive, or unmanly? Why not just say, “It doesn’t work for me, but have at it?”
/r/seduction06/06/26 10:59 PM
2

That’s about as weak a rationalization as I’ve heard. If the majority doesn’t have the better way, what makes you think you do? One question: What is the goal of seduction? Take your time. It’s not a trick question. Time’s up: In this community, it’s to get laid, is it not? Perhaps, you, despite being up to your eyeballs in the Venusian Arts and/or the “Mystery Method”, can tell me how chasing down some inebriated girl in a bar and having sex with her is superior to having fantastic sex with som…
/r/seduction06/06/26 10:40 PM
3

So, judging by your comments in this thread, I suspect you live an extraordinarily promiscuous life. I also suspect from your hyper-meticulous record keeping, “The girls I had the threesome with were #44 and #47” that there’s an element of compulsivity about your Don Juanism. The particular expression you used to describe your attraction to threesomes was telling: “chasing the dragon”. I only heard that once before and it was used by a Vietnam Vet who described his addiction to heroin. It had so…
/r/seduction06/06/26 07:17 PM
3

And yet another PUA wannabe displaying their ignorance. A meta-analysis of seven samples of university students and crowdsourced adults (N = 1,897) revealed that two thirds reported friends-first initiation, and friends-first initiation was the preferred method of “initiation” for an intimate relationship. (That’s 66% to 68% of romantic couples that started out as platonic friends.) Furthermore, 70% of respondents who transitioned from friends to lovers did not have romantic intentions or attrac…
/r/seduction06/06/26 06:04 PM
1

Then you're way ahead of my friend. I'm not sure I see the appeal of sleeping witjh someone whom you don't find especially attractive.
/r/seduction06/06/26 09:11 AM
2

The presupposition that lacking confidence and feeling insecure is a dealbreaker ignores the fact that many women also feel the same way. Studies estimate that between 80% and 97% of women feel insecure about their physical appearance.Other insecurities include aging, imposter syndrome, and just garden-variety intelligence. Put simply, the woman who you think has it all together may be just as insecure as you.
/r/seduction06/06/26 07:38 AM
1

Why do some guys think it's compelling to cite a body count when that number tells you nothing at all about the quality or attractiveness of the women? I had a good friend who seemed to sleep with a different girl every week. This went on for two or three years, and with three or four exceptions, all the girls shared a simple trait--make that two: they were not at all attractive, but they were easy. Am I alone in not being impressed by a crude number?
/r/seduction06/06/26 07:27 AM
1

Yeah, it's been dying for four thousand years.
/r/seduction06/06/26 07:14 AM
2

Sounds like a Ted Talk. Make that a bad Ted Talk.
/r/seduction06/06/26 07:11 AM
1

It's word salad.
/r/seduction06/06/26 07:10 AM
1

It is a clear "yes" or "no" if you've taken the time to build the right foundation. The problem is, for guys like you who know immediately that you want girls to know as suddenly. Aside from that, I don't even know how that conversation starts. What do you do? Ask her where she stands at a certain point?
/r/seduction06/06/26 07:08 AM
0

I appreciate you taking the time in between reading "The Subtle Art" and watching a six-hour Owen Cook workshop. I'll try to make this as brief as possible. Manson's books (plural) are bloated with his spin on certain issues. He considers the "friendzone" the ultimate "sinkhole," despite research showing nearly 70% of intimate relationships begin as friendships and it is the preferred avenue to an intimate relationship. Strike one. Manson buys into and sells a popular but flawed dichotomy of "ni…
/r/seduction05/06/26 10:53 PM
1

Consider this: a book that sells a million copies can have only 1% of readers think it was good and still get 10,000 great reviews. "Models" is vastly overrated and contains some really suspect advice. Mark Manson, also, may have a staff of 20 but his due diligence and fact checking is not world class.
/r/seduction05/06/26 12:32 PM
1

I would suggest you find a copy of Russel Cromwell’s classic “Acres of Diamonds” before you commit to leaving your home to get laid. If you must, you’ll find more than enough “girls from other cultures,” closer to home. All you need to do is travel as far as New York City.
/r/seduction05/06/26 11:00 AM
1

I agree. There is no way to fact-check a person's comment, field report, or...anything about them. The guy who advises on escalation may have escalated himself into a prison cell at Rikers. It's also telling that sound advice is ignored or downvoted while hideous advice is applauded.
/r/seduction05/06/26 08:30 AM
1

To suggest that it's "a numbers game" is to admit that randomness dictates the outcome--and that dating is a variation of the "Infinite Monkey Theorem": put a typewriter in front of a large number of chimps and ultimately their random pecking on the keys will result in having typed all the works of Shakespeare. It sounds good, but it's not true. As a matter of fact there is a very small chance that a given chimp will even come up with the word "banana". I've read enough sad comments by a collect…
/r/seduction05/06/26 08:18 AM
2

Yes, absolutely move on. If she doesn't sit back and allow you to "F*ck the sh*t out of her", being with her is tedious...dull. Then, too, I guess that, as a person, she means little to you except when she's on her back. Do both of you a favor: walk away. She'll live. She might even meet a guy who, if she tells, "Slow down... "will say, "Talk to me... ." instead of getting happy feet. He might also say, "There are a few things that are problems...it's sort of long distance and, man, she smokes h…
/r/seduction05/06/26 07:58 AM
7

If they’re hiding their history, they disqualify themselves as being a trustworthy source of information.
/r/seduction04/06/26 07:33 PM
1

So, who was the dipshit on the video?
/r/seduction03/06/26 09:34 PM
5

There are more red flags in this discussion than in Tiananmen Square on National Day.
/r/seduction03/06/26 08:37 PM
1

So, in your scheme of things “disinterested” is rudeness? Interesting. Has it occurred to you the guy may be uninteresting?
/r/seduction03/06/26 06:54 PM
0

You’re a very astute judge of character. The guy has a few issues but don’t we all?
/r/seduction03/06/26 06:52 PM
1

Ah, the old “If-it-feels-right-do-it” maxim, which for some supersedes the “Just do the right thing” rule, which has been around for maybe 4,000 years, and which is a cornerstone of every system of ethics and morals.
/r/seduction03/06/26 06:46 PM
1

It’s no more rude than just saying, “Well, if there’s no shot at sleeping with you, you’re not worth another ten seconds of my time.”
/r/seduction03/06/26 06:34 PM
6

Lighten up, that possibility is a small price to pay to feel the euphoria of having sex with someone who means nothing to you and who disgusts you.
/r/seduction03/06/26 06:28 PM
2

If I had a dollar for every guy who asked me, “How do I fuck a girl who repulses me given she may have venereal disease?” … .
/r/seduction03/06/26 06:24 PM
3

I could have seen the downvotes coming. His question more clearly framed could have been, “How do I safely fuck a woman who means nothing to me beyond her willingness to have sex, and who has had more bones buried in her than in Pinelawn, given there is a high probability she is a likely human petri dish of venereal disease?” Nothing nasty or vile about that, right?
/r/seduction03/06/26 06:16 PM
5

Yeah. No need for cleverness. Just kindness. It works.
/r/seduction03/06/26 05:40 PM
1

It may go against everything you believe, and I'm sure it will not sit well with the Venuvian Arts crowd but I would have a chat with her and say something like, "It occurred to me that I may have made you uncomfortable on several occasions, and that's the last thing I wanted to do. We don't know each other all that well. The truth of it is, I find you very attractive, and I sort of got carried away." You're going to hear a lot of nonsense about "holding your frame", "leading as the man", "you'r…
/r/seduction03/06/26 01:00 PM
1

Thirty-four comments and only one guy had the good sense to address the most important thing: the guy's claim that he was "severely depressed". He may or may not be, but to give him fortune-cookie advice is exhibit A of what makes seddit such a dangerous place at times. I've seen comments advocating erotic strangulation and non-consensual BDSM.
/r/seduction03/06/26 10:59 AM
1

This anecdote illustrates everything that is wrong with the Gospel of Pickup, in my opinion. Instead of using common sense, you followed the playbook. She gave you not one, but flashed two signs that said, "Not yet." but you pressed on. Why? Because that's what the book says to do. And, now, you're asking strangers to interpret what's going on. That doesn't seem like "detachment"--which is a pseudo-Zenlike thing the book says is necessary. You ARE invested in the outcome or none of what happened…
/r/seduction03/06/26 10:37 AM
8

Seriously. The obsession with flirting, as if it's something magical, has gotten way out of hand. It's not the Rosetta Stone of talking to women, and when it falls flat, it's just damn embarrassing. Imagine a nurse at the end of a 14-hour shift clearly running on fumes. Would you be more unforgettable by saying, "Every time I see you, I vasodilate," or "This place is lucky to have you. You bring something special to the table."
/r/seduction03/06/26 10:21 AM
1

"The Old Familar Faces" by Charles Lamb https://youtu.be/jjl0REbH4Qo
/r/seduction03/06/26 12:38 AM
2

It's true. Was his story true? I don't think it's unreasonable to think he had a great sex life with his wife, until she died. I don't think it's a reach to think his friends were gone. I'm a lot younger and my friends have moved away or passed away. This is what can happen--old age, loneliness--and, for some, there's not much to be done about it.
/r/seduction03/06/26 12:29 AM
13

Your band is gaining traction: not good enough. You have an “insanely strong social circle”: not good enough. You have slept with “some pretty hot woman”: I want more. You’re 24 and are “pretty chill” around women: not good enough. And why, despite all the above—-having things many guys can only imagine—-you are going around like a brooding young Hamlet. You struggle to get laid. So, what can you do? You can begin by being grateful for how fucking lucky you are. It’s not always going to be this …
/r/seduction02/06/26 06:17 PM
6

Thirteen or thirty, we’re all going to have those moments when we said or did something we regret. The challenge is not to get mired in them. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get on with it. You have no control in whether she’ll respect you or not. You can try, but that’s hers to give, not yours to pry from her.
/r/seduction02/06/26 03:08 AM
2

That is stellar advice—about the jrealousy. This was witten in one of the great love letters by a man who, among other things, wanted his future wife to know about his issues. It’s a masterclass in owning our problems “Third (and very important and nasty) blemish: jealousy. I don’t think you know what jealousy is (thank God) in the real sense of the word… . You have felt what I call normal jealousy, and this - to my regret - is not what I’ve got. What I feel at times can pervert my good sense, m…
/r/seduction02/06/26 03:02 AM
2

Really? “How” matters more than “What”? Then try this: “What are your thoughts on Necrophilia?”, or “How do you feel about eating cats?” This idea that content is superseded by how is an enduring fiction circulated by people who don’t even know how the fiction was created—which was from a gross misunderstanding of research done by Albert Merhabian in the 60s—more than 60 years ago. Imagine this conversation: Her: So, what are you doing this weekend?” Him: I am so excited. I’m going to an all-day…
/r/seduction01/06/26 07:38 PM
2

It likely doesn’t. The idea that it displays “romantic intent” is pure nonsense. You’ve gone through the trouble of contacting her and asking her out. Do you really believe that unless you ask her about boyfriend she’s going to think you’re trying to sell her insurance or get her to give her life to Jesus?
/r/seduction01/06/26 05:46 PM
1

PUA gibberish. Desire is primal, an emotion that arises spontaneously, independent of forethought and any consideration of someone’s worth. The idea that a woman must “earn it” by jumping through arbitrary hoops, is one more bizarre idea that spilled out of the tortured mind of Erik Markovik.
/r/seduction01/06/26 09:51 AM
1

Clearly, the term is derived from the Neil Strauss opus that celebrated the sexual compulsiveness of numerous men and their wanton lifestyle, which many now have abandoned and speak out against. By redefining manipulative, misogynistic, and stealthy behaviors as "game", its questionable tactics appear less potentially injurious.
/r/seduction01/06/26 12:42 AM
2

Here's the bottom line: I'd bet you're dealing with a guy who keeps score of his approaches, how many numbers he got, how many converted to dates, and--in his opinion--the ultimate metric: "lay count". It's a slam dunk he's never been in a long-term relationship with someone who blew his socks off. If he had been, he wouldn't think approaching a girl in a Sephora hoping to walk away with an IG is a major achievement. For that matter, neither is getting laid if you're going to sell out to do it.
/r/seduction31/05/26 10:16 PM
1

I've been hovering on Reddit long enough to know when a reply is coming from a guy who is chin-deep in "game". I tried to be objective about your take, nonetheless, but when you highighted this, "The fact that such a high percentage of women you pursued were women you met while they were working is indicative of amateurish skills." I realized you were filtering my comment through your own lens of Erik Markovick, Neil Strauss, or whoever else you read at some point in the past. I distinctly said …
/r/seduction31/05/26 11:07 AM
1

Fair enough. Just consider, despite the tributes given to failure as a necessary element in success, there is no real proof that "fail fast, fail more" is a reasonable strategy to attain any skill: At the top of the list, it presumes a specific individual has the resources to cope with repeated failure (See, Forbes Magazine "The Failure Myth: Why Failing More Often Is Bad For You". Icons like J.K. Rowling and Walt Disney are touted as symbols of the importance of failing but ignore that both had…
/r/seduction31/05/26 12:33 AM
2

I was the furthest thing from a Casanova but yet I attracted a constant flow of girls I found attractive based on my standards. I pretty much did what you suggested. I looked for small signs of interest. It didn't take much. A smile returned. An inviting "Hi." If there was disinterest or even a hint of scorn, I aborted before approaching. Self-proclaimed PUA jedis think "game" is so potent and that consigning it all to a "numbers game" is all that has to be done. Maybe not.
/r/seduction30/05/26 07:59 PM
1

Wrong. Your odds of having an approach favorably received are far better if you approach a woman patiently waiting for a flight in the gate area than approaching one hurriedly trying to catch a flight. Similarly, your chances are better if you approach a girl sipping a latte in a Barnes and Noble rather than one in a cubicle at a college library studying for an organic chemistry final. Your assertion that "I would never be able to open any women anywhere" is patently ridiculous. And as to the vi…
/r/seduction30/05/26 07:24 PM
1

Your most obvious problem is that you believe any woman who meets a certain level of attraction should be approached. That's almost a compulsion, one which invites disappointment. People have lives. They have places to go and people to see. Studies indicate about 20% of people are consistently late, , while an additional 19% to 30% of people confess to being intermittently or chronically late for work at least once a week. Already, you're approaching "total uncertainty" with it being a coin flip…
/r/seduction30/05/26 07:42 AM
1

If you think this nonsense is AI, you have bigger problems than he does.
/r/seduction30/05/26 07:29 AM
0

Sadly, no. It's not AI. This is the best the guy's got.
/r/seduction30/05/26 07:28 AM
1

That's the way it's done. No bullshit line later like "I saw you in the Jetway and thought you were cute", etc. "THAT's flirting and you don't learn how to do it that elegantly. It's a skill--like someone who has perfect pitch. Of course, flirting is not the sine qua non of being charming, but done correctly, with a feathery touch, it makes a woman feel seen and maybe even attractive, or, perhaps, is just a needed bright spot in an otherwise dark day. Most importantly, it doesn't sound like this…
/r/seduction30/05/26 05:43 AM
3

“Game is supposed to be conveying that you’re this high-value guy drowning in pussy, so it doesn’t make sense for you to be sold on her right away.” Game has this wrong. Expressing desire can be the ultimate aphrodisiac (and has been by history’s greatest lovers for a thousand years.) Down deep, we all want to feel desired.
/r/seduction29/05/26 12:35 PM
38

I’m going to tell you something that is rarely mentioned because it’s so obvious: what you say should be determined by the time and place. That is, the setting dictates the approach. What works on an airplane may not be the best way to go in a museum or at the beach. Most of all, just think about what you are comfortable with.
/r/seduction29/05/26 12:31 PM
1

Start with the TKTS booths in Times Square. Check put the board that lists the available shows. Make a mental note of three. Let’s say, “Hadestown”, “Just in Time”, and “Chess” (or “The Great Gatsby”). Then approach a person on line by themself and say, “Hi. I wonder if you can help me. Which one of these shows is one a guy might like?” If she says, “Sorry, I don’t know much about any of those.” then say, “Can I ask which one you’re trying to see?”. If she says, “Moulin Rouge”, you say, “That so…
/r/seduction29/05/26 03:11 AM
1

I think you’re falling into the trap of seeing the body and mind as two distinct entities. That dualism was abandoned years ago and was a relic of Descartes turf war with the church. As an example dietary changes, exercising more, and getting better sleep, all have “mental” correlates and are antecedent to those physical activities.
/r/seduction29/05/26 02:36 AM
2

No, “abnormal” responses to “abnormal” situations are normal. Being “anxious, depressed, stressed, or worried”, is not pathological when one is facing dire financial circumstances, impending job loss, the health crisis of a loved one, chronic loneliness, the end of a marriage or love affair, and even moving into a new home. Even the documented conversion of certain emotions to chronic pain is not so much abnormal as a compensatory measure the brain takes on various situations. I would expect a f…
/r/seduction29/05/26 02:24 AM
2

The subtext is the same, nonetheless. Still, call me skeptical but I think your remark about not someone, but people, plural, being blown off because of their pants is a “figure” of speech also, which you fabricated to justify your intended point, which is that women are “shallow”. They are no more superficial than men, and perhaps less superficial than men in important matters, like picking a mate. Research has shown that while women think about security and resource management, when given the …
/r/seduction28/05/26 05:33 PM
3

You’re the one who made the ridiculous claim that a guy had to be a “celebrity” to even connect with an average girl. That’s bullshit. Need proof? Put on a suit (but be careful about the pants), go to a catering hall, and check out the bride and groom at a wedding—or just watch the couples shopping for an engagement ring and then tell me the future groom is a celebrity. How would you put it? SMH.
/r/seduction28/05/26 04:22 PM
2

You must know that even during the Great Depression people met, dated, and married, as have people in the most impoverished places on the planet. When I was in college it got so bad at times, I waited on line at 6am for a $10 meal voucher but still had a girlfriend I saw once a week. I was hardly a “chad” and by all objective measures she was quite attractive. I truly have no idea what “too busy” means: too busy to visit a park, beach, or just walk around town. And too broke for what? A free con…
/r/seduction28/05/26 04:06 PM
2

Why do you guys so often fold your tents without any resistance? It’s not always going to be easy.
/r/seduction28/05/26 06:30 AM
3

True. Those born between 1997 and 2012 have developed an unhealthy reliance, almost a morbid dependency, on the world they connect to through their cell phones and laptops. Common definitions have changed. They now boast about having 2,244 “friends” on Facebook, while not one would lend them ten dollars. A loan is not something you have an obligation to pay back (in the case of student loans); it’s something the government should “forgive”. Even principles of biology have been scuttled: genitali…
/r/seduction28/05/26 02:35 AM
-1

The stats on marriage have nothing to do with how hard it is to meet women; they simply refer to evolving cultural norms, greater financial opportunities for women, and financial barriers to the cost of buying a home and raising kids. One of the most important reasons is there is no longer a social stigma to remaining single. But dating difficulties, please.
/r/seduction28/05/26 02:10 AM
1

Social media may have dampened things a bit but the internet has opened the door for possibilities that didn’t exist in the 90s. I once saw a video with a girl who was attractive and who referenced a book I was trying to find. She had her email on the vid and I contacted her. She lived in Connecticut. We arranged to meet in the. city. I would have known she existed without YouTube.
/r/seduction28/05/26 02:02 AM
2

They have to believe it. God forbid that they should admit the truth which is likely, “For whatever reason, women just don’t find me attractive.”
/r/seduction28/05/26 01:57 AM
4

I’ve lived in NYC and his perception of things is closer to the truth than your cynical take. I’ve seen no significant difference in what most women are looking for, irrespective of whether they live in Manhattan, Denver, Boston, Chicago, or even Tokyo.
/r/seduction28/05/26 01:55 AM
7

Right. And you NEVER hear stories about average guys claiming they scored a 9 or 10.
/r/seduction28/05/26 01:49 AM
-3

“Men used to meet women in gyms, work, school, book stores, all the time.” They still do. A recent survey found 10% of couples met at work; 6% in a “third space”; 12% at school; 6% at weddings, 5% while doing activities, and 4% in their buildings, with 14% through friends. That’s more then half in the same way couples met each other for the last 50 years. Consequently, your credibility—and, specifically, your claim including know multiple guys whose lives were destroyed just cause a woman said "…
/r/seduction28/05/26 01:47 AM
0

That’s seriously B.S.
/r/seduction28/05/26 01:36 AM
8

Oh, yeah, this just exudes credibility. Now, where did I put Charlize Theron's phone number?
/r/seduction27/05/26 10:14 PM
2

There are “tipping points” that vary with individuals. For some, two packs a day incurs no harm; for another, after one pack a day, the day comes when there’s a spot on their lung. In a world where there are hired killers who can take out a truck driver before sleeping with his mistress, it seems reasonable to assume there are people who can use others promiscuously for self-gratification without any issues. I think there are differences, though. The O.P. said, “I’m over her.” suggesting there m…
/r/seduction27/05/26 05:16 AM
3

You have not mentioned a potential important contributing issue: by his own words he has admitted having sex with women who he has reduced to a mere convenience: “I'm over her, I just use her to get off.” He has also admitted to having “fucked up new women twice in the past month”. This is STRONG language. What, exactly, does that mean? Is that a self-assessment or something the women said? Both William James and Karl Menninger wrote extensively on the extreme measures one can go to if they brea…
/r/seduction27/05/26 03:57 AM
0

You took the cheese of “seduction”, your “game” is at its best, you are using women just to “get off”, but now have full-blown E.D. that even meds can’t help. It’s the American dream—at least the PUA dream. The same one that lead to Erik Markovic becoming severely depressed, suicidal, and lying on the floor in the fetal position. The same one that had Neill Strauss voluntarily admit himself to an in-facility program for sexual compulsives. The same dream that had Mark Manson living at the bottom…
/r/seduction27/05/26 02:44 AM
2

Yeah. Their bathroom for a shower and a couch where they collapse after a brutal shift.
/r/seduction26/05/26 04:31 PM
0

You were told wrong. By my crude estimate about half of all our FAs are married and half of the remaining ones are involved in some sort of relationship. Add in greater job stress due to fully booked flights, exponentially more dissatisfied passengers and you don’t have a climate for promiscuity. So, to answer your question, you don’t use it because it’s s fiction. (Nurses, too, have a high burnout rate.)
/r/seduction26/05/26 04:29 PM
1

Stop thinking about what is a very natural process as something that requires a set of specific skills that some call “game”. Countless men do just fine without knowing a damn thing about approaching, openers, or escalation. Have you ever asked yourself how that could be possible before Neil Strauss wrote “The Game” which was basically a collection of anecdotes about dysfunctional, sexual compulsive men and the cheap tricks they employed to get laid? As to your plight, particularly, when you see…
/r/seduction26/05/26 09:28 AM
3

You’re 20. You fucked up, and probably in a way you can’t unfuck. You displayed drunkenness, impulsiveness, and a side she had never seen before. Unless she is totally smitten with you, stick a fork in it. And add to your “body count” that you probably blew up a friendship. That’s quite a night’s work.
/r/seduction26/05/26 06:08 AM
1

In any contest in you v. a girl’s dog, take the dog—in a blowout.
/r/seduction26/05/26 06:00 AM
1

If you want to see one of the most commonly referred to sources of such a methodology (I strongly advise against it) check out Neil Strauss’“Rules of the Game” or “The Mystery Method”.
/r/seduction25/05/26 08:59 PM
0

Thanks, for advice that is as meaningless to me as mine is to you. Apparently, it has escaped you that by saying I’m “more degenerate” than the O.P., you’re agreeing he is degenerate, and if you are abetting him in his aims, what does that make you despite your presumed righteous indignation? Let’s take a hypothetical: I’m in Lansing. I want to steal a man’s car but it has a very sophisticated anti-theft system protecting it. You advise me on how to disarm it. Are you so ethically compromised yo…
/r/seduction25/05/26 08:51 PM
1

And you don’t think that the “non-needy” PUA who is compelled to go to bars four nights a week, approach numerous women each night, while employing a variety of deceptive, manipulative strategies is displaying obsessive behavior? Nonetheless, you have done nothing to counter what I said: there is an abundance of evidence of men displaying neediness who were not considered repulsive, but the opposite by the woman they pursued. The word itself, “neediness” has become as abused, overused, and as me…
/r/seduction25/05/26 08:15 PM
1

No, it’s not, because there are countless first-person documented examples of the opposite—“neediness”—working. These examples can most easily be found in the love letters of not only great men, but members of the military during World War 2. They can also be found in biographies, documentaries, and interviews. As a matter of fact, the actual hard evidence of men who PUAs would describe as “needy” but who still got the girl, is far greater than documented evidence of men who tried to pull off “n…
/r/seduction25/05/26 03:51 PM
1

Are you surprised he had no answer?
/r/seduction25/05/26 03:41 PM
1

Those who subscribe to the “numbers” theory are conceding it’s random and typify the farmer’s claim that “even a blind pig will stumble on some corn”. Think of the contradiction and the slick embedded disclaimer PUAs employ: “There’s a systemized way to seduce attractive women methodically but it’s really just knocking on doors. Knock on enough and sooner or later someone will buy some new windows from you.”
/r/seduction25/05/26 03:40 PM
1

But so worth the time and effort. And so worth taking a pass on women with whom sex serves the same need as grabbing a quick snack to stave off hunger.
/r/seduction25/05/26 03:33 PM
1

I could select some equally ridiculous quotes from “Models” if you’re interested. But let’s start of with this: he prattles on and on about “inner game” and then gives generic advice about clothes, grooming, and going to the gym. More problematic is his obsession with being “non needy”. Why? Because it will make you more attractive to women. So, at the bottom of non-neediness you have an inescapable paradox: you are trying to come off non-needy because you need women to some degree. Second, Mans…
/r/seduction25/05/26 03:30 PM
1

What an embarrassing coincidence. I never knew there were such pathetically horny guys.
/r/seduction25/05/26 08:55 AM
0

“You can combine these things to convince her you're her actual "soulmate". You also have to be worth possibly ruining her home life and her marriage.” You’re even more degenerate than the O.P. is. Somewhere Robert Green is smiling.
/r/seduction25/05/26 08:52 AM
1

You would like to “experiment”? Let’s call it like it is and not sanitize it: you are willing to be a factor in destroying a marriage and potentially tearing apart a family to get laid. Furthermore, the data indicates about 40% of women 35 to 54 are NOT married, so your claim to justify casting your net for a woman married is bullshit.
/r/seduction25/05/26 08:49 AM
5

“oh I heard girls from ____ can’t be trusted”. A neg by any other name.
/r/seduction25/05/26 06:56 AM
5

What is the fascination with “body count”? It takes more “skill” to have a great relationship with one woman a hundred other guys have tried to seduce but have failed to, then to have sex with a hundred girls a hundred guys could.
/r/seduction25/05/26 01:35 AM
1

The current trend in dating (which is fraught with problems) can be depicted like this: Approach->Converse->Ask for IG->Text ->Ask out. That is a much more passive and circuitous strategy than one that worked well (and still does) since the 1930s: Approach->Converse->Ask out->Get number->Call to confirm. With the latter strategy you know immediately where you stand. You also have the advantage of overcoming any hesitancy with face-to-face charm. Fishing for her IG is, in essence, a ploy to do an…
/r/seduction24/05/26 09:39 AM
1

It can go away if you have just one MAJOR success, not some hookup just because, but one that shatters your belief in what’s possible.
/r/seduction24/05/26 09:23 AM
2

Quite possibly, yes. There’s a really interesting video on YouTube featuring mentalist, Derren Brown. It’s about luck. One story involves a man who claimed to have never been lucky. Brown placed a wad of money on the sidewalk where he had to see it. He never did. He was so brainwashed into thinking he could never be lucky he couldn’t see a lucky break when it was right in front of his eyes.
/r/seduction24/05/26 09:21 AM
1

“It would indeed be cool to put that into words.” What is it that would be slick if put into words: the subtle and obvious signs a woman gives in certain situations? We are hardwired by evolution to be able to recognize these things without the need of bootcamps, or lists of IOIs. If we weren’t, our species would have become extinct long ago. The problem is not recognition but “filtering”. If we see ourselves as unattractive or unappealing, it is likely we will miss signs we would have picked up…
/r/seduction23/05/26 10:21 PM
1

The guy doesn’t always practice what he preaches. He had three videos that were tutorials on how to avoid the much-maligned “friendzone” but in one of his most-recent videos after a girl he runs down dismisses his clumsy attempts to light a spark and announces she has a boyfriend, he tries two or three times to get her to agree to be friends. Now, if that doesn’t make you question the guy’s “skills” and authenticity nothing likely will.
/r/seduction23/05/26 09:56 PM
2

You blew off a serious question. The “signs” of a woman open to giving you her number are not the same for her wanting to be kissed, the signs of which are different than her wanting sex. But, if you want to play that game, one sign of her wanting to adopt a homeless puppy, would be her saying, “I like him. He looks like a ‘Max’ “.
/r/seduction23/05/26 06:18 PM
1

Every guy has his own story: during my “low” periods it wasn’t intellectualizing, it was being broke. I knew a guy who had enough money but he was depressed from the death of a sister. A third guy had put on 40 pounds in a year after a car accident. Then there was the guy who couldn’t get past a divorce after discovering his wife was a serial cheater. Is intellectualizing a factor for some? Certainly, just as being 5’2” tall is, but that’s NOT what he is saying. Consider, two of his examples: Sh…
/r/seduction23/05/26 05:45 PM
0

Signs of interest in what?
/r/seduction23/05/26 09:06 AM
2

Maybe he is for college guys. But for many of us, he's just a guy who has passable writing skills, a self-help guru whose brand is pseudo-intellectuallism spiced with the word "fuck", which he employs at the drop of the hat, almost as if he has Tourette's syndome. Each to his own, but many of his maxims are total B.S.: The key to a good life is not giving a fuck about more; it’s giving a fuck about less, giving a fuck about only what is true and immediate and important. Don't stop there, Mark. T…
/r/seduction23/05/26 02:17 AM
4

All of this nonsense, from cookie-cutter lines to "The Cube" business, serves the same purposes: to mask intent, reduce the possibility of rejection, and inch towards sex. When you listen to the conversations these guys initiate and attempt to hold, it is almost universally the case that they are not very skilled at the kind of casual conversation that naturally leads to a more intimate discussion. Approaches always require some line they find clever. It can never be matter-of-fact, "Excuse me. …
/r/seduction23/05/26 01:43 AM
2

Good advice but likely to be ignored by the “if-butting-your-forehead-against-the-wall-doesn’t-knock-it-down-try- the-back-of-your-head crowd.”
/r/seduction22/05/26 09:25 AM
1

The fact that you routinely describe those who do not subscribe to your kneejerk-by-the-PUA-handbook guidelines as “losers” tells me 70% of what I need to know about you. The other 30% comes from your misguided belief that the only way to conquer one’s insecurities is to invite them and grapple with them. Wrong. You are advising “flooding”, which is risky if used as self-treatment. Even with professional guidance—clinicians trained in the intervention—the “dropout rate”is high, about 30%. Furthe…
/r/seduction22/05/26 05:53 AM
1

You’ve put the cart before the horse. If she likes you, she may like your flirting.
/r/seduction22/05/26 03:37 AM
1

No, flirting does not of itself make you more attractive. It’s just one more tool in the PUA toolbox to express attraction in a way they think is ambiguous and covert. How on earth can, “You look like the troublemaker of the group” make you more alluring?
/r/seduction22/05/26 03:36 AM
1

When you watch his videos, and maybe it’s because English is not his native language, his conversations are uninspiring. It often sounds as if he is struggling to connect.
/r/seduction21/05/26 11:38 PM
18

Not surprisingly, this guy fails to mention a critical fact about flirting: research has shown that about 70% of the time people can’t recognize flirting. Put simply, humans are REALLY bad at detecting it, which might explain why many encounters are busts. Jeffrey Hall, a professor at the University of Kansas, and the author of “The Five Flirting Styles” put it this way: “If you think someone is not interested in you, you are probably right, they are not interested. But if someone is, you probab…
/r/seduction21/05/26 08:44 PM
1

More solid common sense advice which is likely to be ignored.
/r/seduction21/05/26 08:23 AM
2

Yeah. Right. Well done. The guy made a girl confused, annoyed, defensive, and perhaps intimidated and for what? So he could feel proud? A genuinely confident guy would have read the prevailing winds and as soon as he saw she looked “confused and annoyed” acknowledged her state of mind and said, “I’m sorry. Bad timing I guess. Enjoy your day.” and moved on. And for what it’s worth, while his hamfisted approach may have eliminated “what ifs”, it resulted in even more painful intrusive thoughts, “y…
/r/seduction21/05/26 08:21 AM
1

By far, this is the most sensible advice in response to a post that describes a thoroughly ill-advised, grievously miscarried interaction that should never have been made. It’s astonishing to me that there are guys who give points simply for approaching a girl, no matter how awkwardly, as if that deserves a merit badge.
/r/seduction21/05/26 07:58 AM
16

Cudos for pointing out the absolute bullshit of the OP’s rant. It’s just one more example of some clueless guy claiming there are hard and fast rules that apply to all women in every situation in all places at all times.
/r/seduction21/05/26 05:46 AM
11

Holy fucking shit! Another absolute. More black and white thinking. Make a woman earn that compliment. Tote that barge. Lift that bale. Hold that frame. Use one of those pre-canned openers that PUAs have been employing since Jesus was in the third grade: “You look like trouble.” Yep. That line opens a world of possibilities that a sincere compliment about a beautiful tan wouldn’t. And never, forget, ever: you can give a compliment that makes a girl blush but you won’t get laid. It just can’t hap…
/r/seduction21/05/26 05:42 AM
-2

It’s become more nuanced. Tattoos have replaced strange hats and platform shoes. Black suits with white piping are worn instead of fur coats and capes but the basic fact remains: men invest countless hours in devising strategies to get women into bed. When was the last time you saw a request by a woman for a “wingwoman for club game in Detroit”?
/r/seduction21/05/26 12:27 AM
2

How the hell could some moron downvote that?
/r/seduction20/05/26 09:13 PM
4

The advice is just one more ploy to be indirect to avoid rejection. If you put in the time—a few date; if she finds you attractive enough, and if there are no moral, physical, or emotional obstacles to sex, a relaxing dinner and a walk should make getting in the car, and when asked, “What now?” responding, “I thought we’d go back to my place” natural and unambiguous. She’ll either say, “O.K.” or hedge. If she’s not up to it, you just say something like. “On second thought, that may not be a grea…
/r/seduction20/05/26 09:12 PM
-7

Yeah. Right. Do women dress like Cossacks to go to bars? Give themselves names like “Style”, “Matador”, and “Mystery”? Do they carry little kits that hold pieces of lint, a blue light, and fake piercings? Do they create stealth tactics like “negs” and “false time constraints”, spend countless hours discussing “KINO”, or the mechanics of flirting? Do they advise engaging with a thousand men from 17 to 70 to get over the nervousness of talking to guys they find attractive? Reddit seduction has pul…
/r/seduction20/05/26 09:01 PM
1

Indeed. Check the subreddit you’re in—one in which desperate guys often consider manipulation skill, a woman’s “no” as a “shit test”, and flirting with women they don’t find attractive as batting practice for women whose attractiveness intimidates them. “Seduction”, I suppose, is Anglo Saxon for “anything goes”.
/r/seduction20/05/26 08:17 PM
1

So true. More times than not they make it easy to ask for her number. A woman talking to you, even seeming to be interested, is not always code for, “Call me.”
/r/seduction20/05/26 07:38 PM
1

Please, elaborate and point out to me where she unambiguously exhibited behavior that could be interpreted as evolving from his “insane chemistry”. Of course, it may be my bar for deducing such a state is set a bit higher than just talking in the final phase of a flight. I once was sat next to a very attractive woman in the gate area at ATL. Our flight was delayed for 90 minutes due to T-Storms. From the moment I sat down until we boarded, she put aside the magazine she was reading, and converse…
/r/seduction20/05/26 01:11 PM
1

A phenomenon behaviorists call “stimulus generalization”: If a specific situation elicits a certain response, let’s say, your wife was wearing a red dress when you discovered her having an affair with your best friend, in time the trauma could “generalize” to any woman wearing red and eventually even to red tablecloths. Similarly, ways we relate to people, how we frame our interactions in business can become our default way we respond to intimates-and vice versa.
/r/seduction20/05/26 03:52 AM
6

Just my intuition but I’d suggest letting it go. Here are a few reasons why: First, NOTHING in your narrative suggests she felt the same “insane chemistry” as you did. In fact, by your own admission you stated she didn’t show any signs of interest in you for “almost the whole flight” That’s almost an “indicator of disinterest”. Strike one. Then, too, at passport control, not only could you not find her, insofar as you know she made no attempt to remain near you. Strike two. And since “seduction”…
/r/seduction19/05/26 11:46 PM
1

The danger becomes present if you begin to view every encounter as if it were “just a video game.” Some have far-reaching lifelong consequences.
/r/seduction19/05/26 10:29 PM
1

If Written and spoken English is a problem, then take a year off and instead of lining the pockets of bullshit PUA dating coaches, invest something in speaking better. Just go to Thumbtack.com and search, “Public speaking trainers near Manhattan, NY.” It might help if you found a female coach. And another thing: don’t make “game” and getting laid such an all-consuming part of your existence. You see where it’s gotten you: frustrated, confused, and even worse, asking anonymous guys on Reddit for …
/r/seduction19/05/26 08:29 PM
2

I wish I was as sure about one thing as this guy is about everything. He doesn’t know anything of significance about a guy who says, “I haven’t had a date in six months.” but the guru has it all figured out: “Your major problem is you intellectualize everything. Too much calculation. Analysis paralysis.” It turns out, also, the guy hasn’t flossed in six months, he’s been somewhat depressed for six months, out of work for six months, and has a tattoo of Luigi Mangione on his bicep. “Trust me. You…
/r/seduction19/05/26 08:04 PM
2

I can only speak for myself but it was becoming (in the opinions of others) an engaging conversationalist/speaker. I went from a shy 17 year-old college kid who was paralyzed with fear when having to give a three-minute talk to one who could give a 20-minute speech, off the cuff, that had a member of the New York Press Club tell me, “I could listen to you for hours”. I do think, however, it’s a universal: become a captivating speaker and confidence isn’t even a factor anymore.
/r/seduction19/05/26 07:45 PM
4

Very astute observation. “Game” when you strip it down to its (questionable) assumptions is a wild theory based on the assumption that specific actions in a specific sequence trigger a woman’s sexual desire. At its core, “Game” is a variant of “Vending Machine Theory”, which posits that a specific action consistently yields a specific result. Thus, you have the currency you feed the machine—openers, teasing, negs, push/pull, false time constraints, and escalation, etc.,—and what happens? Far too…
/r/seduction18/05/26 11:16 PM
3

“You need to verbally imply interest with plausible deniability so whatever you say must be vague or innocuous.” I suppose you have to employ calculated ambiguity (flirting) if you fear rejection and/or having your true intentions known. That aside, studies indicate that more than 70% of the time, people don’t even know you’re flirting with them, and yet it is a purported Howitzer in the PUA’s arsenal of seduction weapons. It’s just one more cog in the sequence of mechanical rules that coaches f…
/r/seduction18/05/26 10:48 PM
0

O.K., coach. It seems to have escaped your laser-like powers of induction that I had a “professional” responsibility to keep it all-business and not “dating or fucking them” does not preclude being involved with exceptionally attractive women who were not models or actresses. You’re dogged determination to justify your contempt of uncommonly attractive women who, on your totally arbitrary scale merit a 10, has forced me to be blunt: Since I think your opinion is cynical and limited by whatever f…
/r/seduction18/05/26 06:49 PM
3

Prediction: 90% of the guys who pay attention to the 90% of guys on this thread who are bitter and contemptuous of uncommonly attractive women have a 90% chance of never becoming involved with a “10”.
/r/seduction18/05/26 06:23 PM
1

And you’d be right, despite the PUA gurus giving you 50 ways to insinuate yourself into a group. Here’s the bottom line: spontaneity is king, not stealth tactics; being light on your feet. Some guy sent me a video of some self-professed guru’s “infield”. It was gruesome to watch. He threw everything he had at a girl who was likely drunk—teasing, negs, stupid lines. It was painful to watch. If he was a stray dog, you would have put him down.
/r/seduction18/05/26 06:15 PM
7

No matter. If you saw them in aisle six of a Safeway without the styling, you wouldn’t know what they did, but your kneejerk assessment would be uninteresting, conceited, and “separated from reality”—yours—which is as arrogant as any trait they might possess.
/r/seduction18/05/26 06:07 PM
15

And you've talked to "most of them" and you know that "they've never been humbled"? God damn! A friend of mine asked me to work with models and actresses to hone their monologue skills. I suppose in three months I worked with 20 or thirty and with one exception, did not find any of your cynical statements-of-fact remotely true. They had the same insecurities, tales of cheating boyfriends, and, most commonly, stories of guys like you who never said 10 words to them but still considered them haugh…
/r/seduction18/05/26 05:25 PM
8

I was super determined, did not squander energy approaching other women (what was the point), and employed the skill I had--the ability to converse in a way that was at least as good, and almost always better than any of the competition. I was 100% confident that if I could talk to a girl for 10 minutes, I was in the hunt, even with guys better looking, taller, wealthier, and younger.
/r/seduction18/05/26 05:18 PM
16

"I know for 10s different rules apply: - no (physical) compliments - lots of push before pull - making yourself rare" There's the problem. The rules don't change because of a simple fact: The "10" in your eyes may be a five or six in hers. An actress who was once declared People Magazine's "Most Beautiful Woman in the World" for three consecutive years did not know how that could be possible, and point by point criticized her features, which she found unsightly--nose, eyes, eyebrows, chin, etc. …
/r/seduction18/05/26 05:14 PM
1

No, but I can give you an example you gave what exactly to say "if". "If she says, “I gotta go home,” you say, “Why, scared you’ll fall for me if you stick around longer?” The bottom line: I won't convince you that your lengthy post is fraught with contradiction (i.e., "'verbals' are the tip of communication but here are twenty examples of what to say if... .") You won't convince me that as a coach you have a playbook that is as sacrosanct to you as "The Book of Mormon" is to Mormons.
/r/seduction18/05/26 09:21 AM
1

If she's interested enough, you can use sign language, mime, or Pig Latin.
/r/seduction18/05/26 09:04 AM
2

"Most of flirting happens below the words. The eyes, the tone, the smile, the body language. The stuff only the other person can actually feel. Think of what you say as just the tip. The real substance is everything underneath." This is an allusion to the "iceberg metaphor," which indicates 90% of an iceberg is hidden beneath the water. Your belief in this is derived from a popularly misunderstood and discredited study almost 60 years ago by Albert Mehrabian, who wrongly created the "7-38-55"rul…
/r/seduction18/05/26 09:03 AM
2

How? His "guide" begins by trivializing the importance of verbal communication, and then it gives you twenty verbatim examples of what to say, not how to say it. He is almost comically blind to the contradiction, as are the people who think it's clever to say, “I bet you listen to Taylor Swift. That’s a bit of a red flag". Where does he go when she says, "Actually, I don't. I'm a voice major at Juilliard. The last thing I listened to was Maria Callas' recording of 'La Wally'. Do you consider tha…
/r/seduction18/05/26 06:05 AM
1

This shows only minimal AI contribution. The bigger problem is that it is much of it is predicated on a fiction: 90% of communication is non-verbal. Bullshit. What you say is not the "tip of the iceberg". If that were the case, why would he give twenty verbatim examples of what to say and give only three lines to non-verbals? The answer is obvious: because he's so steeped in PUA junk science he recite its tenets like holy scripture. As soon as someone trivializes the preeminent importance of wha…
/r/seduction18/05/26 05:52 AM
4

They don't and can't, any more than a parrot can understand human grief.
/r/seduction18/05/26 05:41 AM
6

There may be AI contributions but this is not "written by AI". Given the O.P. is an Indian dating coach, he likely does have an agenda that goes beyond just sharing knowledge.
/r/seduction18/05/26 05:40 AM
1

It's not about options. It's about how resilient we are and how abundant LIFE IS, which wired things so that if we miss one bus, another comes along, maybe not in 15 minutes, but inevitably, if you don't get disappointed waiting.
/r/seduction18/05/26 03:51 AM
3

Here’s something I hope gives you a rock solid source of hope: When I was 17 I thought I could not endure an existence without Sarah, the most beautiful girl I had ever seen—until I met Cheryl at 19. Despite still being wet behind the ears, I heard wedding bells, but they would be hers with Tommy. I was done. Never again. But I met Geri at the local pool at 20. Sarah? Cheryl? They were schoolgirls. Geri was feminine thunder and lightning in a body that could melt the vault door at the Chase…and …
/r/seduction17/05/26 11:17 PM
8

You’ve got to be a real hoot at a wedding. I’d love to hear your toast as best man to the happy, although itchy couple, anticipating their first night of conjugal bliss as man and wife. “David…Barbara. As you enter a new life together, it’s important to understand that the desire you feel for each other, is a delusion—a superficial illusion, and I would advise each of you tonight to mentally strip away the skin of the other to see the body in front of you as simply a collection of bones, flesh, …
/r/seduction17/05/26 10:55 PM
1

You might've been the fifth guy today, maybe the 10th, in the past 24hours, who has seen the practice of “game” fail, and yet not one has questioned its assumptions. Not one has asked, “Is it possible that teasing isn’t a great idea? Or push/pull?” And maybe ‘breaking rapport’ does more harm than good. It’s really pretty astonishing. Stephen Hawking’s theories had more critics than Erick Markovick’s.
/r/seduction17/05/26 03:40 PM
1

That’s the problem. Dating coaches marinated in game can come up with 15 steps to swat a fly. It’s just a futile attempt to systemize an inconceivably complex human interaction: sexual attraction. When I was in my early 20s a prof who was quite the ladies man said, “It’s a lot easier than doing an itemized tax return.” “If she gives you that feeling, introduce yourself. That’s the entirety of it. ‘I saw you in Calculus. My name’s Jack.’ “ You’ll know in 10 seconds if the next light is green, red…
/r/seduction17/05/26 01:12 PM
2

Do you see the contradiction inherent in such an elaborate process for such a simple thing. First, and most importantly, the end game is the date, not simply to score an IG so you can text. The agreement to go on a date comes first, followed by her phone number, and then a call to lock in the details. No texting. No need for templates. It works. There’s a lot of “old school” that has stood the test of time. “Hello. My name is Roberto. May I join you.” “I am late for an appointment but it would b…
/r/seduction17/05/26 09:21 AM
1

Genobs, have you stopped to consider that the things you believe should work, do, for some guys, but not in the long run for most guys? You probably don’t know the name Buckminster Fuller—a brilliant guy, who came thisclosetosuicide. He asked, with radical honesty, “How did I get to this fucking point?” He concluded, “By taking other people’s words for things.” I’d bet you gorged yourself on books like “The Game”, “Models”, “The Mystery Method” and God-only-knows how many videos. And look where …
/r/seduction17/05/26 08:02 AM
2

You don’t score points in this space by using common sense. Desperate guys who feel they are no hopers have made “The Game” their bible and quote it chapter and verse like a Baptist at a tent revival. For some it inspires the same degree of blind allegiance as Scientology. The O.P. has gotten 135 upvotes despite it being proven that speech is not only not a small part of verbal communication, it’s a huge part. Then, too, this teasing shit is a blade that can cut both ways; it can make a woman la…
/r/seduction17/05/26 06:10 AM
1

As with “life coaches”, dating coaches can become one just by declaring it. I’m constantly amazed by the hundreds of “up arrows” God-awful comments real in.
/r/seduction16/05/26 11:38 AM
1

Here’s the deal. I’m going to delete my replies to you because you clearly feel insulted—and, for the time being you can read all of my 3,000+ comments so you can see for yourself the tone and quality of my comments.
/r/seduction16/05/26 11:31 AM
1

I’m not so sure it’s complacency as it is not making finding someone a priority. A friend who felt stuck told his therapist, “I’m just afraid of approaching women.” The therapist said, “You won’t be when it’s important enough.” He was right. When my friend saw one he HAD to talk to—an opportunity like he had never had—he pounced on it, as scared shitless as he was.
/r/seduction16/05/26 07:08 AM
2

But the real catnip is “I see you’re wearing all black. You look like a very powerful business woman.” “Uh, no. I’m a part-time server at a restaurant, I just got off and I’m on my way to a funeral for my third husband.”
/r/seduction16/05/26 06:09 AM
1

You think? Any posts by dating coaches should come with a trigger warning. And for what it’s worth, what is the allure of a “six-foot european” that makes it such a compelling testimonial.
/r/seduction16/05/26 05:43 AM
1

Sometimes, you wonder if these dating coaches aren’t really writers for The Onion”.
/r/seduction16/05/26 05:39 AM
4

Interesting. The first encounter was natural: a complement and the dreaded “interview style” but it still worked out. However, both times you broke out you “PUA Playbook” (“teasing”, “push/pull”, “playful disqualification”) it didn’t go well. The truth is right in front of your face (“ The teachings almost never seems to have the desired effect”) and you still are committed to going by the book. Not long ago a pilot who who had rolled an airplane up, said, “I don’t get it. I did everything by th…
/r/seduction15/05/26 08:51 PM
1

I wish you the best of luck. I can do that and point out what should be obvious: you were so occupied with the mechanics of the approach you didn't consider the most important factor: context. It's like Jeff Goldberg's character in Jurassic Park said about the scientists who were cloning T-Rexs: "You were so concerned with wondering of you could, that you didn't stop to ask yourself if you should." You admit it was near closing, you admit the girl was busy, and you think I'm pissed because you'r…
/r/seduction15/05/26 07:25 AM
1

I misunderstood then. Your name stuck out since “The Book Thief” was just on. I could have sworn you made a comment about “your clients” and “9s” and “10s”. Of course, that could be lawyer speak also.
/r/seduction15/05/26 02:15 AM
1

O.K. My other advice is still sound. Many desperate guys have turned to “The Game” with almost religious zeal. Among other things, it preaches: “Say anything”: If, for example, a guy has zero experience, no war stories, make one up, or use someone else’s. For instance, a guy has never had oral. Borrow someone else’s tall tale. It also teaches that focusing on one woman to the exclusion of all others is a malady, called “Oneitis” that must be avoided. A more problematic one is the means to get by…
/r/seduction14/05/26 10:13 PM
1

And you will likely be no better off. You are facing legitimate challenges—skills deficits that are cultural and language-based. Imagine that you have been in a bad accident. You are temporarily confined to a wheel chair but the doctor says, “With physical therapy for a year, you’ll be as good as new, perhaps better.” That is analogous to your current situation. If you are struggling with English in English speaking countries, put women aside for a year and focus on speaking English at a satisfa…
/r/seduction14/05/26 09:03 PM
1

Just a thought: there’s one consideration. You’re attempting to be both the participant and observer, which is very difficult, if not impossible to pull off. Imagine that you’re rehearsing Shakespeare’s famous monologue from “Hamlet” but without recording it—or practicing your tennis serve. You might think you did something wrong or right when the opposite is true. As just one example, consider the approach you made when employees in a store were closing: you talk about this or that being done “…
/r/seduction14/05/26 08:35 PM
2

I think I’ll think for myself rather than abdicate to an anonymous, frustrated guy who draws conclusions from a frustrated woman he doesn’t even know.
/r/seduction14/05/26 12:50 PM
1

Let me ask you a question. Imagine a hypothetical. The girl in his latest video is your sister or daughter. You're going to meet her somewhere and then you see this guy jog up alongside of her. You also notice a guy recording the encounter. You ask, "What's going on?" and he says, "Oh, he has a YouTube channel where he teaches guys how to meet women on the street. He hires me to record it . He's miked up. He'll do this five or 10 times a day, a few days a week, and then he'll put the ones he thi…
/r/seduction14/05/26 06:36 AM
2

I came up with that in ten seconds just as an example of couching an “over-the-top compliment in a way that, at worst, would have a girl think the guy was a player, not someone way in over his head for the first time. In total, I agree with everything you’ve noted. One girl takes your hand as you cross the street, another snatches hers away from yours and says, “DON’T”. That happened to me. What a revelation. I was having regular sex with a girl, but my arm around her was off limits. The fatal f…
/r/seduction13/05/26 11:25 PM
1

If by that you mean it’s where points are scored, it is, often. Studies indicate almost 70% of relationships begin as friendships, but they are that of Cyrano de Bergerac and his friendship for Roxanne—not the false kind of a guy who sets out to get laid and then attempts to sneak in wearing a mask of friendship.
/r/seduction13/05/26 11:12 PM
1

Actually, it’s twice as much, and took me 10 minutes or so. When you add the 34:57 he invested to describe his four “hit and run/false time constraint and compare it to my 10 minutes, and then add the time it took for him to post his mini-tutorial, it should be obvious I could knock out my comment while waiting for a cup of coffee to cool down while he had to suit up and hit the streets for what was likely hours to extact 40 minutes of video. Not surprisingly, you don’t answer the question: why …
/r/seduction13/05/26 11:08 PM
1

Consider this: You might, as an experiment, forget about it being “a number’s game”. Don’t approach as manically as the OP to get your 10 or 20 in. Only approach a woman you find attractive enough to risk being turned down and only if there’s something about her you find interesting, That’s critical because it greases the wheels of conversation. As an example, I was on a train when I was in grad school (the LIRR) and saw a very attractive girl with a Playbill for a play I was interested in seein…
/r/seduction13/05/26 10:05 PM
3

Forty? Maybe, but his advice is often flat-out nonsensical. He warns against telling a girl she’s so gorgeous or very pretty because she will assume you never interacted with one of that caliber. B.S. She might just as likely assume “you say that to all the girls”. Worse still, in his latest video he gushes that a girl dressed in black looks like “a very powerful business woman”. For those keeping score at home, “very pretty, bad”, “very powerful, good.” Then, too, he ignores the inarguable fact…
/r/seduction13/05/26 09:08 PM
3

I’ve had women just give me the “I just like you as a friend.” Fair enough, but after being turned down as boyfriend material saying, “Will you be my friend?” No, that’s just weird. If a friendship evolves naturally, great, but as a consolation prize? Who shoots for that? And why?
/r/seduction13/05/26 02:01 PM
10

It’s fairly obvious: Put yourself in that position. You approach a girl you find attractive with the ultimate goal being sex. (He even boasted of a lay count of 40 in the past year.) You attempt to get her to go for a drink. She politely says, “I can’t. I have a boyfriend.” Then, instead of accepting that, wishing her a good day or good night, you say, “We can still be friends, can’t we?” She, again, says, “I do not think my boyfriend would like that (friends with a guy who has already hit on he…
/r/seduction13/05/26 01:26 PM
31

This is the same guy who a year ago posted a video that was titled, “A Girl Tried to Friend zone Me. This is what I did.” Not long after that, he has a video titled, “When she tries to friend zone you but you’re built different” He triples down on an anti-friend zone video five months ago—but what does he do in his most-recent video? After his attempt to connect with a french girl fails, and she has told him she is “with” someone, he, not she, suggests they can still be friends! Think about that…
/r/seduction13/05/26 12:30 PM
3

An ex reached out to me. I cannot tell you the profound regret I have for opening that door. To borrow from the rabbi in “Fiddler on the Roof”: “May the Lord bless her and keep her…far from me.”
/r/seduction13/05/26 05:36 AM
0

First, you assumed that I was afraid to approach. After taking that head on, your next sidestep was to suggest I didn't watch the video. Now, it's that I haven't addressed your point about what he initially said, which, I suppose, it that this is a basic approach. That's irrelevant. The guy advocates misleading a girl he is approaching: on one occasion, he lied about his age. On another occasion, he claimed he was originally from Philadelphia, and with another girl, that he was originally from C…
/r/seduction12/05/26 11:39 PM
0

Four women, right? One 19, he mentions he’s 38? “I forgot I was supposed to go straight into the false time constraint? I ask a question, she responds, I respond, etc. And just God awful camera work. Yeah, I didn’t watch a guy in a black tank top getting a number from a girl who could “potentially” go on a date with him—a girl in scrubs, or him talk about getting his students to apply his cookie cutter method the first 100-200 times. I apparently forget I’m on Reddit, also, where guys like you f…
/r/seduction12/05/26 07:10 PM
0

I would guess from that asinine assumption you think approaching a woman is some herculean task, a fearful thing that you must work at before you can do it without breaking out in a cold sweat. Why else would you mention it as if it were some great accomplishment, when, in fact, if you are only marginally creative and possess a rudimentary degree of conversational skills, approaching a woman is no more difficult than asking a waitress what the soup of the day is? Do you really believe it takes b…
/r/seduction12/05/26 01:22 PM
1

I don't agree with you all that often, but in this case your example cuts through all the bullshit and gets down to the raw truth. Why wait until she is naked beside you to say that? What stops one from saying it? Fear of failure? If you really don't care about the outcome, why not say it? Why not go further? "You are fucking beautiful. It must be indescribable to sleep with you."
/r/seduction12/05/26 07:46 AM
10

How about this? Approaching a girl with absolute candor if, you’re almost paralyzed with fear, admit it. If you feel tongue tied, admit it. If you expect to be blown out of the water, admit it. How freaking radical can you get? You’re doing all those things that almost guarantee rejection. It’s consummate “Opposite George”. Better still, try that. “Hi. My name is George. I’m unemployed and live with my parents.”
/r/seduction12/05/26 03:56 AM
5

Keep in mind, this is the same guy who said—and you can’t make this up unless you’re batshit crazy—“You can’t beat Brad Pitt on the tangibles, but you can beat him on the intangibles.” Right. He’s had a few beers with the guy. He knows what B.P. is like off camera. How does anyone believe anything this guy says?
/r/seduction11/05/26 10:09 PM
-1

Do you have any idea of how many people claim to have been abducted by aliens, possessed by demons, or been healed by some tent-revival preacher who smacked them on the forehead? I know a guy who was diagnosed with stage ll testicular cancer, denied all conventional treatment, and was told by some fanatic, “Just find the best marijuana you can, spend all day doing whatever you want. Quit work. Listen to music. Binge on Netflix. If you don’t have a girlfriend pay for one. You’ll be fine.” Two yea…
/r/seduction11/05/26 10:02 PM
-2

You’ve made me appear absolutely psychic. What did I predict? “Of course, there will be those who attempt to dispute the study by saying ‘that's what women say they want, but what they really want is something else.’ “ And here you are right on schedule, as predictable as a solar eclipse or a bad Mets team. As to your “known fact”, are you suggesting that if there were 68,000 women in this study, that roughly the 60,000 or so who answered anonymously, lied when they said “kindness” was the most …
/r/seduction11/05/26 08:59 PM
0

I wonder how these girls would feel if they knew 1) the O.P. was using that same line--word-for word-- on three more girls within an hour, 2) that he was basically using them as crash-test-dummies to get views, and 3) he was recording them to prove how easy it was to get their numbers. That's the problem with this. To get a number, you resort to becoming Shelly Levine, the scam salesman in GlenGary GlenRoss who would do whatever it took to make a sale.
/r/seduction11/05/26 11:40 AM
10

Joe, there are so many desperate, hurting guys that see themselves as outcasts and hopeless losers, that they will believe just about anything, including the nonsense of a self-proclaimed Scandinavian dating coach whose only "credential" appears to be he has been talking to women for 13 years. That's it? There's no price tag you can pin on that.
/r/seduction11/05/26 11:18 AM
-7

"The first one, and probably the most important one (rule to becoming instantly attractive), is not giving a fuck." Fact: As reported in Business Insider, A 2019 study of 68,000 people found almost 90% of women ranked kindness as the No. 1 quality they wanted in their lover, followed closely by supportiveness, intelligence and confidence. "Not giving a fuck did not make the top five. (The surveyed population came from people in 180 countries.) Of course, there will be those who attempt to disput…
/r/seduction11/05/26 11:10 AM
1

Using the word 'but' as you have, was a not-very nuanced way of Using negating everything that came before it. “I agree people are still people, the human brain hasn’t changed, 50% of people are not using apps, and as many as 95% of women STILL wish men would be more proactive in approaching them, while only 50% of men have approached a woman in the past year BUT the environment has changed.” You also make the preposterous claim that “A woman today can receive attention from hundreds or thousand…
/r/seduction09/05/26 11:01 PM
1

The hardware hasn’t changed. If a woman finds you suitably attractive her response is little different than it would have been in a market in Tangiers a thousand years ago. The fact that 50% of people PREFER the anonymity and sense of security does not mean the erotic brain has changed. In numerous surveys more than 80% of women wished men would approach them more. What does that tell you? It screams many men prefer simply not getting a match than having to look a woman in the eyes as she says, …
/r/seduction09/05/26 07:05 PM
1

I’m on your side with a low opinion of 99% of dating coaches. They line their pockets with the money of desperate, often lonely guys. And, yes, they spread their theories around as if they are universally beneficial for all guys everywhere. Only someone in pain could take that cheese.
/r/seduction08/05/26 09:58 PM
1

I did, sort of. That kind of openness was advised in a book called “Pairing” by Dr. George Bach. He called it “leveling”. Pause, ask yourself what you’re feeling, own it, and express it. If you don’t feel like “the prize” don’t pretend you are if you’re living in a van down by the river.
/r/seduction08/05/26 09:51 PM
0

Spare me—all of us—your pretensions of omniscience. There are all manner of derangements that are trotted out by misguided individuals in this space. Yours are in a category of its own.
/r/seduction08/05/26 09:46 PM
1

I was hopeless, embarrassing, actually. Worse than Louis C.K. with the cute bookstore lady. All it took was for me to say to one girl was, “This isn’t going well, is it? I know I suck at this.” She said, kindly, “You’re doing fine. Actually, you’re a breath of fresh air.” Suddenly, it was a whole new ballgame. Fuck trying to be confident. I couldn’t pull it off, anyway. I was amazed at how many girls were open to that sort of candor.
/r/seduction08/05/26 08:05 PM
1

This guy (probably a kid) reminds me of a guy who wanted to fly for a U.S. legacy airline. He didn’t put in the time to nail a certain maneuver you will be asked to perform during a recruitment sim check. We knew he was in trouble. After busting numerous check rides as part of the hiring process, he became resigned and bitter telling anyone who would listen, “Trying to be hired by the majors is a waste of time. ‘They’ make you think the average guy can do it. They’re full of shit. The sim check …
/r/seduction08/05/26 07:57 PM
0

Now, the anger is coming out that is beneath all this, and It is white hot. He is not only annoyed or frustrated or even pissed off, he is FUCKING pissed off, all caps.
/r/seduction08/05/26 07:40 PM
0

Who is “we”, and if it is for “some guys” like you, describe what “like you” is.
/r/seduction08/05/26 07:36 PM
2

Which explains your distorted views on the experience of guys who do.
/r/seduction08/05/26 07:32 PM
0

And how the hell do you know what most women consider the right vibe—“big enough” vibe?
/r/seduction08/05/26 07:29 PM
2

“I do understand that it still works but only if a guy is a huge catch.” Your “understanding” is not only wrong its absurdly wrong. Approximately half (50%) of couples met online, the remaining 50% in all other ways—school, work, through friends, at work, etc. “They will try to frame it like the guy is losing a major opportunity… . That’s not the case.” Who is this guy? If you happen to sit next to a stunning woman on a flight who is intelligent, warm, and single, and you do nothing, by the defi…
/r/seduction08/05/26 07:25 PM
9

Yeah. Even in this economy. There were 1,000,000 marriages during the Great Depression. What’s another excuse? Climate change?
/r/seduction08/05/26 04:56 PM
3

Few people know that Bruce Lee had two serious deficits as a marshall artist: exceptionally poor distance vision and one leg shorter than the other. This was the inspiration for developing a close-in style of fighting and leading with his right leg to optimize balance and power. So, you might ask yourself, “What might be the benefit of ADHD? Reframe your situation. See yourself as a member of a club that includes Richard Branson, Bill Gates, Simon Sinek, Walt Disney, and which likely included Al…
/r/seduction08/05/26 11:30 AM
1

Here’s a simple start. https://youtu.be/LhQGzeiYS_Q?si=FUyxRtqfCe2143c6 Stop trying to control people. Stop making choices without refection. Stop watering the past. Stop wallowing in it. Stop ruminating on what was. If you can’t manage that on your own find a reputable cognitive therapist who will help you do it. You’ve become a hoarder of sorts, but instead of pieces of string and old bicycle parts that clutter your bedroom, you have allowed your head to become filled with the decayed memories…
/r/seduction08/05/26 08:31 AM
3

Please consider the advice of others. For me, there’s something unsavory about these guys (coaches) and it’s something you see almost every one of them do: they secretly record their interactions with women. It’s not illegal, merely shoddy, and I’d pay to see the reactions of women who discover they were nothing more than crash-test dummies for these guys and the compliments they were given—“I like your style…”I saw you and you looked cute”, were given to ten other women that day.
/r/seduction08/05/26 08:06 AM
1

I’d get rid of your first sentence since you are a coach.
/r/seduction08/05/26 07:55 AM
2

Your last sentence is the simple secret of the ages, and it’s not even a secret, just common sense.
/r/seduction08/05/26 07:53 AM
5

This comment is a “standalone” and says it all. The coach you pay $999 probably read a couple of books, watched countless videos, and is now charging desperate guys for poached, distilled information.
/r/seduction08/05/26 07:51 AM
6

It’s more than possible that you’re not as unattractive as you think. In fact, it’s almost a certainty.
/r/seduction08/05/26 04:19 AM
1

I suppose it depends on a guy’s confidence and how desirable the girl is to him. If he believes it’s just a matter of time before she caves and no other girl is as beguiling to him than watchful waiting is not a bad strategy.
/r/seduction07/05/26 11:59 PM
2

Let me see if I understand your reasoning, Counselor. You claim I’ve changed my argument and dismiss it as evidence of a low IQ. Then, when I elaborate on the facts upon which it is based you dismiss it as an unnecessary “dissertation” and do not attempt to refute a single point. Your go-to response is to thump an emoticon, and ask a question without specifying what it is that is “easier” or in what way it is easier. And this is supposed to be an example of a superior intellect? If so, I’ll pass…
/r/seduction07/05/26 11:55 PM
1

They’ve changed. In many ways it has become easier than it has been in the past one hundred years. For the greater part of American history potential “romantic” interests were limited to those who lived within less than a mile of you. If you lived in any of the small towns that are the backbone of the country, this meant a schoolmate, someone you met in church or who was in your social class. If you lived in Denver, the chances you could date a girl in Boston were just about non-existent. Becaus…
/r/seduction07/05/26 08:31 PM
2

You didn't deny that my guess about your approximate age was correct, so I guess you're somewhere between 20 and 25. Consequently, unless you're a doctor, there's not much you are qualified to help me understand. I think for a kid you've probably had a lot on your plate to deal with. Serious shit, and not all that long ago. I might have picked that up sooner. Sorry about that.
/r/seduction07/05/26 01:34 PM
1

There are millions of guys, tens of millions of guys, and perhaps even hundreds of millions worldwide, who did just fine last night, will tonight, and for the foreseeable future. If you're not one of them, women are not the reason.
/r/seduction07/05/26 12:32 PM
1

Since the game is, "Let's Make Assumptions.", I suppose it's my turn. The tone of your most recent comment--(i.e., "Tell me you're listening") is a bit discordant. It's difficult to describe--like when the sound of an engine is just not right. I've sensed that tone before when a niece who was twenty was throwing a tantrum. She barked, "Listen to me!". I suspect you might be about the same age, perhaps three to five years older, but not much more than that. I doubt you were alive on the day the T…
/r/seduction07/05/26 08:27 AM
1

PUA nonsense. I once kept in touch with a girl for three years after she first told me that she wasn’t interested in me in “that” way. On another occasion, the “slow burn” took four years before a girl suddenly saw me in “that” way. And in both cases it was worth it ten times over. The inability of guys to reap the benefits of delayed gratification is something I find baffling.
/r/seduction07/05/26 05:46 AM
3

Research has established that a women”s assessment of a guy’s attractiveness (i.e, appeal as a mate) varies over time in both directions. Familiarity can either kindle desire or disgust. I guess the takeaway is not to be discouraged if a woman is initially less than inspired to have sex with you, and don’t bank on her being all in on Tuesday even though she was mauling you on Monday.
/r/seduction07/05/26 04:52 AM
2

What on earth could possibly be advantageous about purposefully dissociating oneself from a positive experience and noting it as a “third party observer”? It’s astonishing. Nature has invested millions of years in creating neurochemicals like oxytocin to create strong bonds between people and an elaborate architecture of the brain which rewards attachment and bonding, but only man—at least some men—become militant in their belief that attachment is a bad thing. I’m so glad I’m too dumb to see th…
/r/seduction07/05/26 12:38 AM
1

Ovid’s classic, “Ars Amatoria” is about the most comprehensive in the literature of antiquity and he never came close to suggested the kind of probative mental introspection the OP has. If anything, Ovid concerned himself with what is now called “escalation”. Even Part Il (Of Sexual Union) of the Kama Sutra, the most exhaustive work on intercourse ever written, addresses the act and not mental states that may interfere with it. I suppose somewhere there is a historic figure like the Vicomte de V…
/r/seduction07/05/26 12:10 AM
1

I was wondering when you would emerge from your lair with yet another scathing rebuke. You never disappoint—except when you do. Still regaling 30-year old virgins with your encyclopedic knowledge of “game”? Still advising hapless guys to act like Junior Soprano? (Some comments you see stick—like that of the guy who counseled “controlled sexual strangling” to turn on a “slow-burn” woman). For what it’s worth, didn’t Junior eventually wind up in a state of severe dementia, spending his last days i…
/r/seduction06/05/26 07:20 PM
0

So, stay away from TikTok. Here’s the thing: there is zero benefit in believing some seismic shift has happened in the past 10 years that has made meeting women brutally hard. Accept for a certain slice of the population there’s no proof it is any more difficult than in the past one hundred years. Sure, 42% (or whatever the number is) consider it more difficult but that’s no more proof it is than the belief angels are real being proof that angels exist.
/r/seduction06/05/26 06:18 PM
9

I went to a talk by a Vietnamese Buddhist and he said the practical goal was to avoid something called Duhka, a state of craving that is like drinking seawater. The more one drinks, the thirstier they become. Sex, money, power, even a desire for non-attachment can create Duhka. This is entirely different than being greatly attracted to a woman and pretending you don’t care if you connect with her or not. Of course, you do, or you wouldn’t waste time with all that elaborate scheming in the first …
/r/seduction06/05/26 12:10 PM
0

There are so many tenants of “game” that don’t hold up under scrutiny or with practical, in-vivo application. Teasing and flirting as universal activities that act like aphrodisiacs are two. So is “kino”. I’d also add “calibrating a masculine frame”, being dominant, creating false time constraints, and manufacturing the illusion of “scarcity” as less than sure-fire strategies. True story: my best friend in college drew gorgeous women to him like moths to a flame. He was a closeted, gay ginger gu…
/r/seduction06/05/26 11:08 AM
22

That whole idea of “not giving a fuck about the outcome” has a whole in it you can drive a truck through. It’s basically a variation on the Buddhist idea of non-attachment, which sounds good on paper but which does not work when a person triggers the neurochemicals of bonding in out brains (i.e.,oxytocin). Then, too, the idea that one is not outcome dependent as sex approaches orgasm doesn’t pass the laugh test.
/r/seduction06/05/26 10:57 AM
35

Excellent take. I would add to your example that attempting to APPEAR like you don’t give a fuck when you do is moronic. Of course this is just one more tenant from the “Gospel according to Eric Markovick”, a variation of “never show interest”. As a personal note, on seven occasions I had a girl I was going with snatched away by guys who spared no effort in expressing how interested they were in her. Lesson learned.
/r/seduction06/05/26 10:40 AM
3

No, I’m not. As I said, it was comprehensively intuitive. If a girl didn’t reciprocate there was nothing “learned”. We simply chalked it up to its most fundamental truth. She wasn’t into us. It was wonderfully primal. We knew, there would be times when you didn’t make the team, get the job, or the girl. If you struck out in the bottom of the ninth or shanked a punt you felt like shit until it passed. You didn’t look for probable cause like an Investigator for the NTSB. Keep in mind, the guy who …
/r/seduction06/05/26 09:25 AM
5

I don’t think so, not in any meaningful way, except for those who have been sucked into “game” with its unnecessary rules and theories, or for those who cast their nets in online dating. Nonetheless, the neuroscience of attraction has not changed in eons. The fundamentals remain intact: the “engine” of sexual attraction—the brain’s reward circuits and its complex biochemistry are the same as they were 10,000 years ago. Admittedly, on the individual level, for a person who defaults to pornography…
/r/seduction05/05/26 10:38 PM
1

I didn’t say it wasn’t English. I’m just voicing an opinion similar to Bill Maher’s about having to stuff one’s brain with another idiom of the month, that will be abused and cast aside next month. For him it was “Overton Window”. So far in 2026, for many, “Rizz” has replaced “charisma”. (Is the two additional syllables all that difficult to say?) Then, there has been “only in Ohio”. “Did you see the vid of the United 767 clip that semi?” “Only in Ohio, man.” WTF? I discovered it suggests someth…
/r/seduction05/05/26 07:26 PM
-2

God, I hate what’s happening to the English language.
/r/seduction05/05/26 10:46 AM
26

The thing about all this "seduction" coaching is that the average guy did just fine for thousands of years without having to be asked and answer "10 deep, confronting questions". No one spoke of "inner blocks", "avoided emotions", or “recurring behavioral problems”. (We all had the same issue: we got tongue-tied and rattled in the presence of attractive girls). But, despite a laundry list of liabilities and deficits, it all worked out somehow. I was at the epicenter of a group of totally unremar…
/r/seduction05/05/26 08:27 AM
1

And, again, another casualty of “Can I have your I.G.?” If you want to avoid this, ask her out as soon as you realize you’re attracted to her. THEN, get her phone number to lock in the date. This while IG thing is so…passive. Limp. It sets the tone, in the wrong way.
/r/seduction04/05/26 09:12 PM
5

I find they reflect wayyyyyyy too much, doing post-mortems on the specific wording of a text; the meaning of a woman looking at a fingernail, etc. That’s the problem: hyper-vigilance, not too little.
/r/seduction04/05/26 08:34 PM
6

That’s all you can ask.
/r/seduction04/05/26 08:21 PM
1

Uh, oh. He nailed you with the feared downvote. Call 911.
/r/seduction04/05/26 07:44 PM
1

Sure, you do, or you wouldn’t respond at all. People who truly don’t care wouldn’t invest 10 seconds in saying, “I don’t care.”
/r/seduction04/05/26 07:43 PM
133

And you’ve tested this on how many guys to make the claim it “Works for Everyone”?
/r/seduction04/05/26 11:35 AM
0

I’m even less convinced now.
/r/seduction04/05/26 11:22 AM
3

I’m not convinced you know what social skills are.
/r/seduction04/05/26 06:57 AM
0

That is extraordinarily bad advice.
/r/seduction04/05/26 05:51 AM
1

To some extent, yes, it is. I see an epidemic of blunted emotions. Now, many don’t confess they have feelings; they “catch feelings” like they are the result of a viral infection. Foolishly, also, many believe you can have “casual sex”, as if involvement in the most intensive, intimate physical experience we can have as humans is like dressing “casual” for a company picnic. Mothers are called “Parental Units” or something like that. It’s getting weird.
/r/seduction04/05/26 03:40 AM
1

Congraulations! You’ve survived a war, the assassinations of a president, a senator, and MLK; Watergate, Iran Contra, an Arab oil embargo, the 70s, Disco, bellbottoms, a few deep recessions, a President getting head in the oval office, and parents who were members of the greatest generation. It must be just a bit amusing to you, as it is to me, to see the weeping and gnashing of teeth because college students have to pay back student loans.
/r/seduction04/05/26 03:15 AM
1

Yeah. No one under 40 could possibly have seen “2001, A Space Oddyssey”, and if you refer to “Psycho”, “Citizen Kane, or “Dr. No”, you’ve got to be at least seventy.
/r/seduction04/05/26 02:12 AM
2

Victor Frankl, the legendary Psychiatrist, on many occasions, had clients in your situation. His advice was ingenious. Viktor Frankl, the psychiatrist and developer of logotherapy, utilized a technique known as “paradoxical intention” to help couples regain the fire. In one case, he advised a man and woman to lay naked together for at least an hour a day and to do everything except have sex. In your case, that would also require refraining from “playing” on line or indulging in any fantasies tha…
/r/seduction03/05/26 10:32 PM
1

I think most people will get that from the title.
/r/seduction03/05/26 08:15 AM
1

The probability that Mo's comment is AI-generated is near zero. If you know anything at all about editing, there are at least twenty signs that the content is created by a human.
/r/seduction03/05/26 07:33 AM
2

You impulsively accuse the guy of not only using AI to write his comment in the complete absence of AI "fingerprints", but dismiss it as "slop", and I'm the one who "really got chipped"?
/r/seduction03/05/26 06:45 AM
3

It happens to me, also. I’ve edited for major publications, ghostwritten, but if you can churn out comments at level of a high-school aspiring journalist, some butt-hurt character will squawk, “AI”.
/r/seduction03/05/26 05:35 AM
3

It's not even criticism. It's a knee-jerk response to compensate for his own inadequacies. I don't agree with your overall take on things, but I know AI when I see it, and this is not even close. At any rate, you're in good company: there have been passages from Hemingway, Markus Zusak, and the MacArthur Award Winner, Ocean Vyong, that have been thought by lightweights to have been AI generated.
/r/seduction03/05/26 01:58 AM
3

Here's a thought: Submit his comment to five or six AI text detectors and see what happens. I know. I've done a lot of editing and after you check it out you can repost and say, "Sorry. I guess I was wrong. You're just a much more talented as a writer than I am. So, naturally, I had to compensate by accusing you of AI generation."
/r/seduction03/05/26 01:54 AM
-3

I could have told you what to expect if you even came within a time zone of criticizing the ridiculous notion that women have it easier. More options? Options, how? Does the “average woman” have a queue of guys lined up on be bended knee begging for their attention? Men in the U.S. outnumbered women by 1.8 million— a 1% difference. Some advantage.
/r/seduction02/05/26 11:05 PM
0

Why do I think you’re not laughing? Also, explain to me why my insights are of no value because they are based on anecdote (which is critical to discovery), while your “dinner is a lot of pressure” is not based on anecdote. What did you do? Survey a thousand people? One more thing, if you didn't read my "essay", how did you know about the anecdote? You read it, perhaps not all of it, but enough to hit a nerve.
/r/seduction02/05/26 06:59 PM
1

I understand. It would take a fifth-grader about 2 minutes to read. So, I edited it down to a length that would take a fourth grader thirty seconds to read.
/r/seduction02/05/26 09:54 AM
1

How about he forgets all that "game" business when he's around the woman he wants? There's no need for him to try to create an illusion of "scarcity".
/r/seduction02/05/26 07:51 AM
-1

"And dinner is a lot of pressure to be forced to sit across from someone you don't know." I have gone from meeting a woman at baggage claim, talking to her while we waited for our luggage--10 or 15 minutes, max-- on to dinner a few nights later, and never had any problems. Not one. Even when it wasn't a love match, I still got a "That was lovely, thank you." But, I suppose if one cannot put a guest at ease, the pressure would be intolerable, the equivalent of defusing a bomb.
/r/seduction02/05/26 07:45 AM
1

I have had no less than five girls I was very attracted to who initially saw me as a friend, but who eventually (within a year in most cases) began seeing me as a potential boyfriend. Take it or leave it, believe it or not, but here’s what I found to be the way to go: DO NOT play your female friends, and DO NOT “run game” on them. In time, as they become more aware of your attractive traits-—integrity, compassion, a sense of humor, generosity, and an upbeat, enthusiastic zest for life--you will …
/r/seduction02/05/26 05:04 AM
0

I’ve found that to be the case only with guys who don’t have much else going for them. It’s the business about “When you’re only tool is s hammer… .”
/r/seduction02/05/26 03:16 AM
1

Of course, I was exaggerating a bit. The gold, here, is having a valid reason to think. “Fair enough. For the short haul I may not be her kind, but down the road, as she discovers my sense of humor, intelligence. and other ‘intangibles’, if the science has it right, she could see me in an entirely different light.” As I suggested, it’s all about patience/impatience. Is it worth waiting to see how it plays out in a few months or a year while I go about my life, and tell the girl who wants “just f…
/r/seduction01/05/26 09:39 PM
-5

"Movie or restaurant are usually what an inexperienced guy would propose as a date since it’s what they do in movies." I suppose this aligns with your belief that being arrogant is the way to go.
/r/seduction01/05/26 08:29 PM
2

(This may be a five-minute read but well worth it.) You have bought into the PUA’s irrational contempt of the “friendzone”, which is what linguists define as a “nominalization”—the process of turning verbs or adjectives into a noun. As an example, a person who habitually drinks to excess (“He drinks heavily”) becomes a “drinker” or alcoholic. Those terms are catch-alls for an entire complex of behaviors. Similarly, when you declare you are stuck in the friendzone, you are not describing a real p…
/r/seduction01/05/26 07:34 PM
-2

Why?
/r/seduction01/05/26 06:08 PM
2

You can see the pull—just like that of the person who is diagnosed with inoperable Stage 4 cancer and elect to go to the Philippines to a spiritual healer. Some guys, sadly, have known little other than futility, failure after failure, and crippling loneliness. They are desperate, sometimes dangerously so. One day they stumble upon a sub like this or find a copy of “The Game” and everything is new: “I was just like you. Unloved and unwanted; a never-been-kissed, never-even-had-a-date, virgin at …
/r/seduction01/05/26 05:23 PM
4

Oh, no: this can’t happen. Women fall for confident men like those volunteers in a stage magic show. “You will now obey my every commend. You are now…a duck!” Or they react like those sinners who answer a preacher’s alter call at a tent revival when they are thumped in the head and collapse in a heap. They MUST follow your lead. They have no choice. Such is the power of confidence.
/r/seduction01/05/26 05:00 PM
4

…or a woman detecting he is on autopilot, slavishly following a prescribed routine to seduce her.
/r/seduction01/05/26 04:53 PM
2

If “Game” was a drug created by Pfizer, given the inconsistencies of its results, it would have been pulled from the market.
/r/seduction01/05/26 04:43 PM
1

Restaurants, diners, pizzerias and fast food places have been a part of dating on the initial date for a hundred years—until the geniuses behind “pickup” said “bad idea” for all sorts of ridiculous reasons. (Couples were going to White Castle in 1921. Nathans has been around since 1916. Both were popular first-date spots in their time, as was Jahn’s which opened in 1897.) It was (is) an essential part of American and European culture. The aspiring PUA is a different breed of cat altogether—parsi…
/r/seduction01/05/26 04:39 PM
40

“Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.”—Mike Tyson.
/r/seduction01/05/26 11:38 AM
4

No, because it’s not. A terrible first date idea is making fun of how your date decides to spice up her pizza.
/r/seduction01/05/26 11:34 AM
2

“I said "I was starting to like you but idk now": That’s just a dumb line.
/r/seduction01/05/26 11:31 AM
1

As I said: you suggested she was weird by that question. One might also ask, “Who tf cares if someone puts ketchup on pizza?”
/r/seduction01/05/26 11:29 AM
1

And he’s butthurt because she didn’t find it funny.
/r/seduction01/05/26 11:26 AM
1

It’s all about subtext: beneath your attempted cuteness was the message, “That’s funny” or “That’s weird.” Joke or not, it’s a vailed criticism that could be interpreted, “Ketchup on pizza? What are you doing that for?” Next time, make yourself the butt of a joke.
/r/seduction01/05/26 11:24 AM
1

Live by the text; die by the text. I have no idea why your generation, whichever one it is, has embraced texting so comprehensively. It has, at best, 10% the impact of a telephone conversation, and 1% the impact of a face-to-face conversation. I don’t think it’s possible to convince me that this default, diluted, compressed means of communication is “just the way it is.” It’s incredible PUAs talk about “holding masculine frame”, “leading”, and “dominating”, and they settle for having to make it …
/r/seduction01/05/26 03:19 AM
1

You’ll notice you didn’t get an answer. That’s not surprising. I’d bet if AI had a completely reliable B.S. meter that could assess the truth of every claim made by those commenting, we’d be shocked about the percent of comments that were pure fiction.
/r/seduction30/04/26 09:16 PM
1

“I also just did some research recently on a trend I started seeing post pandemic.” What was the nature and methodology of your research? A survey? A questionaire?
/r/seduction30/04/26 08:37 PM
1

Good luck with whatever path you choose.
/r/seduction30/04/26 06:47 PM
1

I don't know why his website is forbidden but go to YouTube. Search "JT Tran". You will see "ABCs Of Attraction | Asian Dating Coach For Men". Then search within his videos for "Indicators of Interest". Click that on. you will find "13 Indicators of Interest: How to Spot If She’s Attracted to You (3 Of The IOIs Are For Asian Men)" which I guess is the video form which the blog post was transcribed. For the blog post, you can try, [https://www.abcsofattraction.com/blog/indicators-of-interest-list…
/r/seduction30/04/26 10:26 AM
2

And your ratio of 1:100 is based on what given almost 70 percent of romances may begin as friendships (“The Friends-to-Lovers Pathway to Romance: Prevalent, Preferred, and Overlooked by Science”) This study by Stinson et al. for the University of Victoria (a meta-analysis of seven studies of 1,897 adults) reported that just south of seven-out-of-ten adults chose “friends-first” as the most prevalent AND preferred path to an intimate relationship. Despite peer-reviewed research on the “friendzone…
/r/seduction30/04/26 07:52 AM
1

So, now, the problem is the length of the post. And you chirp about not addressing a core idea.
/r/seduction30/04/26 03:31 AM
2

I thought I did address his “core point” but if you need it more succinctly, remember: you asked for it: On his website, he has a lengthy article titled: “How to spot attraction: 13 Indicators of Interest” in which he asks, “What are some REAL indicators of interest (which he describes as signals of a woman’s interst) These include, in his own words “playing with her hair” (For reasons he never explains, he considers “compliance testing” superior to an IOI. “Hunting for An IOI is one of the most…
/r/seduction30/04/26 12:35 AM
1

I’ve got good news for you—great news, actually: just as height, good looks, and money might be assets, they are not essential in mating. Nor is confidence. As I think back on my high school friends, my God, we were a sorry lot. One of us, Dick, was about six feet tall; the rest of us were hard pressed to hit 5’9”. We weren’t very glib and girls didn’t give us the time of day—until one did. Eventually one saw past all our deficiencies. Here’s the thing: Neil Strauss and all of his kind have conv…
/r/seduction29/04/26 09:17 AM
2

Not all that strange. It’s sad, but the majority of people who participate here have romantic lives that aren’t working very well. There’s a lot of frustration, disappointment, and, I suppose, anger directed against women.
/r/seduction29/04/26 05:11 AM
2

How telling. Someone thought you should be penalized for liking a comment that suggested a woman’s words should be respected and not brushed off as so much static. And some of these guys wonder why they’re 30 and never been kissed or 30 and just throwbacks to when we were hunter-gatherers.
/r/seduction29/04/26 04:26 AM
3

It took just one girl to make me a believer after countless beatdowns, and once you have that affirmation, things get a lot easier. So, until it’s proven otherwise just believe you’ve been unlucky or in a long slump. Jack London, who had over 600 submissions rejected before he sold his first story, faced significant financial ruin from failed agricultural ventures including a disastrously failed, costly sailing voyage. Abraham Lincoln couldn’t get elected dogcatcher. And Kurt Warner was stocking…
/r/seduction28/04/26 10:40 PM
-1

B-“ for effort. Your inability to be aware of your contradictions is almost enviable. So, you begin your “compliance testing”: “Hold my seat. I’ll be back in a minute” She agrees and you suggest based thatyou are not making any inferences about what that “compliance” means? You turn up the heat and put your hand on her shoulder, she leaves it there, and you, again, don’t “ infer/guess what that suggests? Of course, you do. You said, “Never trust what she says, only trust what she does.” Not “the…
/r/seduction28/04/26 10:17 PM
-2

“As the saying goes, never trust what she says, only trust what she does.” This threadbare nugget of PUA wisdom ranks up there with the most precarious of its bizarre absolutes. It’s potentially dangerous. At the top of the list of why this mandate is so ridiculous, is the fact that when a woman says something like, “I’m engaged, leave me alone.” she has DONE something: she’s either lied to you or given you a warning. Similarly, if she says, “Take your arm off of my thigh or I’ll tell the barten…
/r/seduction28/04/26 07:33 PM
1

Posting for 15 years? So what? When you read some of his stuff the overuse of “triplets” seems a bit off: “Baristas, shopkeepers, gym greeters.”, “No this, no that, no something else.” For some reason, AI likes that structure. I’m not saying he uses AI but he might want to edit these posts and ditch the “It’s not this; it’s that, as well. Also, I’d eliminate the too-cute-by-half bon mot that lacks emotional residence: “When we leave people will be talking about us”. That seems a bit off (and I s…
/r/seduction28/04/26 07:14 PM
1

The “wisdom” dispensed on this snake pit is so appallingly awful you wonder why it doesn’t come with a trigger warning. I’ve seen miscreants advocate “sexual strangling” to spice up one’s love life, the lack of need for condoms, and, of course, how to avoid the trip wire of a virgin’s “resistance”. The ends some guys will go to get laid is a much greater problem than not getting laid.
/r/seduction28/04/26 06:49 PM
5

“People say its reps of how may approaches.” Those people are wrong. They’ve adopted the tenants of “game” in the same way a person answers the altar call at a tent revival. The proof that all that ( negging, calibration, push-pull, the horrors of the “friend zone” etc; ) is unnecessary is incontrovertible. A thousand years before Erik Markovic bought his first bottle of black nail polish guys were meeting, “dating”, “sleeping with”, and marrying women without having a clue what a “cold approach…
/r/seduction28/04/26 06:30 PM
0

You do realize he used the term to suggest mentioning marriage would help the girl see them as a “unit”—or did you miss that?
/r/seduction28/04/26 05:56 PM
0

Be careful. It’s actually an insult. Imagine you’ve applied for a job and the interviewer says, “I know hiring you is going to bite me in the ass.” What is he thinking?
/r/seduction28/04/26 05:54 PM
-1

You might start by thinking of the women you are trying to nail as something other than “hoes”. Most people think that the words that come out of our mouths are random. Wrong. They describe our relation to reality. Imagine if you said (about your boss who you are trying to impress), “I’m tired of these scumbags passing me over for a promotion.” You think your frustration wouldn’t leak out in some way they might detect? People are a lot more perceptive than we often give them credit for.
/r/seduction28/04/26 10:20 AM
2

Get serious. Even if it was a line, there is nothing weird about it. Approaching a girl and saying, “I bet you’re a lawyer”, because you don’t have the skill to say anything more compelling, is just flat-out bizarre.
/r/seduction28/04/26 08:17 AM
2

Obviously a few of the 350 people who read this tutorial and said, “Oh, yeah. This is good stuff.” don’t take well to the suggestion they’ve endorsed sophomoric silliness that many of us would find embarrassing.
/r/seduction28/04/26 08:09 AM
2

You guys… . You’re so marinated in game you can’t even use the word “couple”. You’re a “unit”.
/r/seduction28/04/26 08:04 AM
1

The “tactic” is no different than that you see high school kids using at homecoming.
/r/seduction28/04/26 07:58 AM
1

This tutorial is yet another example of what I see is a fatal flaw in “game”: just about every damn moved is contrived. There’s a way to enter an environment, what to say, when to say it, and how to say it. Then there are rules for how to simply walk up to a girl and make your presence felt. Eventually, there are rules for how to do one of the most natural things a guy can do: touch a girl—again, when, where, and how. Of course, all these rules and strategies can be an entrepreneur’s dream: they…
/r/seduction28/04/26 07:56 AM
1

Pascal, who knew something about math, physics, and inventing, said, "The heart hath reasons reason knoweth not." Put simply, it can know at a level that the cerebral cortex can only imagine.
/r/seduction27/04/26 08:52 PM
1

One more consideration: do you really need a scorecard to assess improvement numerically? Consider the situation of having a flu: it may start off with lethargy which gives way to generalized body aches and ultimately a fever and a few other symptoms—inappetence, a cough, and a sore throat. You might take your pulse and temperature intermittently for a day or two. Then on day three the fever breaks and you’re hungry again. Do you have to continue taking your temperature, count calories, and have…
/r/seduction27/04/26 08:45 AM
1

I suppose I’ll have to reference an urban dictionary to avoid confusion. Still, I’m guessing you didn’t see his volcanic reply after I questioned his belief that a guy had to make hundreds of approaches a month or he would never understand women. Had you, your belief that he thought I was good with women would have been shattered. It was just south of Edward Norton’s Tourette’s’-like rant in “25th Hour.” Whoever he is, the guy was not Mr. Rogers.
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:51 PM
1

I asked the guy for a clarification since “he fucks” is not all that clear. Given there are many people who frequent this sub for whom English is not their first language, it was not an unfair question. Imagine Leonardo Dicaprio writes an op-ed on the many A-List conquests he’s had and some guy responds as a non-sequitor, “He fucks”. No, I don’t think he was addressing me but since he deleted all his pithy comments, we’ll never know what he meant.
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:25 PM
3

Fair enough. Safely, inconspicuously, check out the contents of her cart. Look for something you find genuinely interesting. I once saw a girl with protein powder, nutritional yeast, flaxseed, honey, and Chia seeds. That interested me as I was researching nutritional aids after a diagnosis of breast cancer for a female friend. I approached her, said, “Hi. Excuse me. Can I ask you a question about those (the Chia seeds). She said, “Sure.” I told her about my friend. That lead to her telling me ab…
/r/seduction26/04/26 10:11 PM
2

And you failed miserably. But that’s what genuine science is for. When I was in grad school I designed an experiment that a photo of an author impacted how an article would be rated. It seemed my hypothesis was a no brainer: the same article written by a beautiful woman as an unsightly one would be judged better. Wrong. My assessment of “beautiful” and “unsightly” was never tested empirically. Whether you know it or not, you’ve attributed numbers to concepts right out of “The Mystery Method” whi…
/r/seduction26/04/26 09:02 PM
2

“The most useful insight after 6 months: stress doesn't disappear with experience.” If that’s true, your system is fatally flawed, and it’s easy to see why. Your metrics are arbitrary, based not on the results of smaller pilot studies, but on your experience. To cite just one example, how did you arrive at the conclusion that holding a conversation for 2-3 minutes was 1000% more difficult than beginning a conversation? Then, too, by constructing an ELO for texting your presuming it is a zero sum…
/r/seduction26/04/26 08:50 PM
1

I’m genuinely interested. Would it be needy to say to a girl sitting on a train, “What is that scent? It’s wonderful?” or to a woman in the gate area at an airport putting on makeup, “You don’t need that. You look amazing already.”
/r/seduction26/04/26 02:49 PM
0

We have different definitions of a loser, obviously. You’re the poster boy in my opinion for all the misogynistic, misanthropic minnows who pretend to be whales. You believe you’re the smartest person in the room when, in fact, you’re probably stopped from entering most rooms. I’m going to guess by your infatuation with verbal pyrotechnics that you’re in college or not far from it—five or six years removed, which would suggest that you haven’t seen as much of life and the world as you want peopl…
/r/seduction26/04/26 02:43 PM
0

First of all, two of those three are not very wise choices. Accountants not only help the wealthy reduce taxes, but also help the first-time homeowner. That not-very-clever question might be offensive to her. She might volunteer her services to help seniors or others fill out tax forms. Perhaps her parents are wealthy The third line is even worse. It suggests that accountants are robotic individuals who do rote work that requires little ingenuity. Here's the bottom line: don't try to be too cute…
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:28 AM
3

So, based on that ONE example, you're going to make a universal claim that telling a woman she is beautiful will result in a look of disgust? What are the odds that if it wasn't an "older guy", but a young, charming, virile guy with a 20-megawat smile, that she would have been repulsed?
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:20 AM
1

How do you know if they are interesting as they pass by? That's something you discover in time.
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:17 AM
2

I couldn't care less if it's AI or Ovid. It's the ideas that count and this guy's are often just plain bad.
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:16 AM
1

The great fiction of "game" is that there is a set of rules that apply to all women. The road to the bedroom with one woman might be laden with compliments, for another, teasing and an absence of compliments, which they consider false.
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:13 AM
2

The allusion to Samurai duels is a bit of a stretch. When you study the lives of those historic figures who were renowned for their powers of seduction, they rarely attempted to bed a woman when first meeting them.
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:09 AM
1

"If you don't count in the 100s of approaches each month at the very least, you're not gonna figure it out ever." That's a generalization--an absolute, actually--that cannot be proven but which can be proven not to be an absolute by anecdote. I never saw a need to make even one approach a month if I didn't see a girl/woman who was so attractive that I was almost irresistibly drawn to approach her. Consequently, throughout high school, college, and in the early years of my career (21-26), I don't…
/r/seduction26/04/26 11:04 AM
8

No. No. No. Research has blown the myth up that failure is the path to success. Success is the way to succeed. Small victories that are stacked on top of each other. Failure, if chronic, can lead to learned helplessness. It can chip away at our confidence. This is why major league ballplayers are shown where they have the greatest success when at bat--which pitches when swung at give them the greatest chance of getting on base. I have no idea who started this business of glorifying failure but t…
/r/seduction26/04/26 10:54 AM
1

Which means what? He gets laid? I think you and I are on the same page if your comment is about the OP. The guy’s style is cringeworthy. After running down a woman and jumping in front of her, he starts chatting and its amazing to watch: “You look interesting. I like your walk. You have a very synchonized walk. You know, like synchronized swimmers.” (I don’t think that is technically a compliment. “I just had to ask you: are you a dancer or figure skater. You move through the crowd with such gra…
/r/seduction26/04/26 02:55 AM
2

Given the “f” key is separated from the “s”, by only one key, did you mean “sucks”?
/r/seduction25/04/26 02:09 PM
6

Give me a specific situation. There are no Swiss Army Knife solutions that work in all places for all women You might have to wait awhile for my reply. I’m about to board my flight.
/r/seduction25/04/26 02:06 PM
12

Seeing a girl pass by and running her down like she’s a shoplifter that just left a store may be one of the least elegant ways to approach a girl on the street—and yet this is the preferred method of coaches such as Ben Sader and the O.P. Who came up with this? Is this the reason many guys go home with nothing to show for a night of making 20 approaches? It’s unnatural and looks like a Hail Mary. There are far more nuanced ways to meet girls in any situation.
/r/seduction25/04/26 01:29 PM
1

There is do much nonsense people toss out on this sub. Perhaps the most inane in this guy’s tutorial was his suggestion a woman who has been treated to a nice, quiet dinner will think he is using the date as a lure for “you know what”? Correction: the most ridiculous was suggesting a woman could feel “obligated” after being taken on a nice date. It all boils down to the same thing: the guy is not attempting to maximize anything: he is attempting to minimize being rejected.
/r/seduction24/04/26 10:51 PM
3

It doesn’t. I’m surprised this guy didn’t point you to his website where he might refer to Wittgenstein’s Philosophische Untersuchungen to make a point about women who fail to respond to a text.
/r/seduction24/04/26 10:24 AM
6

We don’t see the world as it is but as we are. The fact that you can believe such misogynist (or incel) crap says it all.
/r/seduction24/04/26 10:16 AM
1

Don’t know about the AI but the lack of confidence this rule mandates is obvious.
/r/seduction24/04/26 08:01 AM
1

You’re right. His bullet points smack of bending over backwards to avoid rejection.
/r/seduction24/04/26 07:58 AM
2

There is an element of intrusive thinking in this which would suggest that the rumination about sexual abuse is a way to avoid dealing with the real underlying fear. That’s what rumination is: a diversion. Find out what’s really frightening you and this obsessive thought will likely vanish.
/r/seduction24/04/26 07:52 AM
15

I’m not going to invest much energy in dismantling your extremely suspect mandates one by one. Only coffee? That’s it? Where’s that written in stone? I’ve never had a woman who was sufficiently attracted to me attempt to downgrade a dinner invitation to “How about just coffee?” Not once. “Don’t plan in advance?” As in “never plan?” This just in: women have lives—professional obligations, family responsibilities, ad infinitum. I once met a very attractive woman on a train. She was a lawyer, on he…
/r/seduction23/04/26 10:10 PM
1

Again, you are so on point. Don’t waste your time trying to make anyone accept the obvious. Nature itself rewards success and penalizes failure.
/r/seduction23/04/26 12:00 AM
1

The current body of research would suggest you are an outlier. An example: you want to lose 20 pounds but every day for a month you look down at the readout and haven’t lost an ounce. What’s your “reframe”? “What have you learned? What is your state of mind? Your mood? The opposite scenario. Every third day, you look down and have lost three ounces. What have you learned? What is your state of mind? Your mood? Which motivates you more? The failures or successes? Which might lead to resignation? …
/r/seduction22/04/26 11:55 PM
1

It doesn’t matter what skill you’re learning, from cooking an omelette to nailing a split-s in an F16, instruction is never about encouraging failure. It’s understood that learning any new skill will likely invlude mishaps as part of the process. You’re advising something else: you’re encouraging failure as essential to learning. This is a pervasive idea that was popularized by John Dewey, but which is increasingly considered a myth aspeople often learn less from failure than from success. Resea…
/r/seduction22/04/26 11:36 PM
1

“As soon as you make this about one girl, you're not going anywhere, you may as well pack up and go home.” PUA/Mystery/bullshit. I did just that, as many have, and it turned out to be one of the best decisions we ever made. Then, remarkably, you work the other side of the street: “If someone is saying that you shouldn't do something for any reason and it doesn't quite make sense to you, be skeptical and try it yourself.” But not focusing on one girl, which you would consider the disease of “onei…
/r/seduction22/04/26 11:13 PM
1

Don’t overthink this: it’s because they want sex, it appears presently available, and here’s the big one: “resisting” is just something women do. It’s part of the package, a hurdle they put in a guy’s way for reputation management. They resist to avoid being thought of as “easy”, or because of social conditioning; never, or infrequently, because they find sex with a guy a violation of genuine values, or worse, because the idea is unappealing. No, it’s a counterfeit, so pay it a bit of attention,…
/r/seduction22/04/26 06:39 PM
0

No, it doesn’t make you special; the fact that you think it makes you special is ironically what makes you common—particularly, in light of the fact that your body count may rest on women many believe they would not have approached. Sure, you’ll say, “They were all 8s and 9s.” I’d bet you’re like a friend I grew up with. His count must have been over a hundred. The thing is, another one of my friends and I agreed that of all of them only one was one we would have approached. All the others were …
/r/seduction22/04/26 06:11 PM
2

"Sure, let's stay in touch" is the death knell. It would have meant far more if she had stopped at “sure”. Those four words are the classic, “Don’t call me, Ill call you” exit.”
/r/seduction22/04/26 05:42 PM
1

Nonetheless, it was a much better read than all that PUA crap about “escalation”, the merits of daygame”, and how to lure a woman back to your apartment. The thing that stood out in your post was the complete lack of stealth. You weren’t instructing on overcoming resistance or any trickery to convert a friend to a member of a “rotation”. So, kudos for that.
/r/seduction22/04/26 05:30 PM
19

Women are much more nuanced; they may not be as predatory as men but they do actively pursue men. Think of it this way: there are lifeforms like spiders and snakes that hunt in an obvious way. Then, there are carnivorous species of flowers that “hunt” by using enticing scents, vibrant colors, sugary nectar, and which emit U.V patterns that mimic food. Women are the latter.
/r/seduction22/04/26 10:48 AM
1

Here’s the bottom line, Chico: a great deal of life experience with girl friends, a wife, a daughter, nieces, and, probably, close to a thousand flight attendants, has taught me this: it’s wiser to err on the side of taking a woman’s words at face value than to consider it as a stealth attempt for connection. I have heard too many sad stories of guys who spun a simple, unambiguous statement a woman made for their own reasons only to discover a divorce later that they should have taken every word…
/r/seduction22/04/26 07:02 AM
2

The overarching problem with AI-influenced writing is that, unpolished, it lacks something essential: empathy, which is why there are now AI “humanizers”. And, Dear God, does it love the sound of its own voice. A woman’s preference for a certain kind of man is “aspirational”. Your barber would say, “Damn, son. What you expect? That she preferred a guy who don’t have his shit together.” As dinosaurios suggested, AI leaves fingerprints, and for some of us, when it’s sniffed out, the user loses cre…
/r/seduction21/04/26 08:32 PM
1

“Read read the energy not the literal words.” That can be dangerous. If a woman tells a man looking for a long-term relationship, “I’m just looking for something casual.”, it’s best to believe her. If you’re a guy who is a regular St. Francis, and who has a dog, a cat, and a parrot and is told, “I don’t like pets”, believe her. If she says, “I don’t want kids”, believe her. If she says, “I believe in open relationships”, believe her. The fatal flaw of “read the energy not the literal words”, is …
/r/seduction21/04/26 08:08 PM
1

Yes, physically, is a “stretch”. There’s the second miracle. I’m agreeing with you. Louie, this could be the start of a beautiful friendship.
/r/seduction21/04/26 07:02 PM
2

Three miserable years. It was a shame. At some point in the girl becoming a woman, something fractured. Bitterness set in. She had been quite a lovely person. It’s a mystery, truly.
/r/seduction21/04/26 01:47 PM
4

I was living with a girl. It was amazing for awhile but the wheels came off. I was planning a way to get out. She had gotten flat-out cruel. I knew she was cheating and thought, “What now?” I did’t have to wait long. One night she mentioned this guy I suspected she was running around with. She told me had proposed and she had accepted. As weird as that sounds, the breakup was not unexpected. It was the heartless way she went about it; no, “We have to talk” or, “I’m so sorry, I never expected thi…
/r/seduction21/04/26 01:17 PM
1

You can just search “Funny Headlines” or even better, “Stupid Headlines”. Another perk: before you intiate conversation or approach a girl, “prime” yourself with a few. Nothing loosens you up or builds confidence like feeling superior to low-hanging fruit, which we all are at times. “Worker Suffers Leg Pain After Crane Drops 800-Pound Ball On Head” (You would have thought it would have been a lot worse.”) Then this: “Planes Forced to Land at Airport”. (Just one more example of a meddling bureauc…
/r/seduction20/04/26 10:42 PM
1

The problem with that is it’s a prefab and doesn’t really express true emotion. All you have to do is check out a website like Drudge for some interesting news. Isn’t this more interesting: “The world is going ginger as humans are still evolving - into redheads.” or, “Influences spinning Nicotine as Health Hack.” Better still is sharing something proven funny. I often would be reading something while chuckling a little, and the girl across from me on a train, or seated next to me in an airplane,…
/r/seduction20/04/26 09:14 PM
1

It may very well be that your beliefs about this are as legit as those of a Scientologist, which is to say they are delusions and conditioning has nothing to do with it.
/r/seduction20/04/26 04:27 PM
-3

She’s your f’ing mother. What made you so bitter you can’t call her that? Even people who were abused can say, “I didn’t have a good mother.” The fact that you call her that suggests height is not your major problem.
/r/seduction20/04/26 06:34 AM
17

If you do the work, the dating pool gets smaller but your social skills get sharper, which can bridge the deficit because you’ll confidently approach women you wouldn’t when you were green. I think of the girls who intimidated me at 20. By my early 30s I could chat up actresses and models. (who I met at an airport or through a friend who was a photographer for Vogue) without breaking a sweat. It was obvious, also, that while I never slept with any of them (married), I was far more appealing to t…
/r/seduction20/04/26 06:31 AM
3

Some do have plenty of time at 30, some don’t. It’s gaslighting—if you want to use such a ridiculous term—to suggest you’re in your prime in high school or college. How? Physically? Perhaps. Emotionally, intellectually, and socially? Not even close. By might late 20s I could approach and talk to people (both women and men) I wouldn’t have dreamed of at 22. By 35, I could engage with actresses, models, politicians, and others feeling absolutely comfortable. So, again, as with most of life’s quest…
/r/seduction20/04/26 06:28 AM
1

I agree with much of what you say, and would have entirely, were it not for one objective fact (or is it three facts)—and this (or these) facts have nothing to do with “subconscious coping”: At the top of the list, reliable studies indicate that 50% of adults do not like gyms for reasons of which they are aware—the culture, cost, “gymtimidation”, and here’s a sneaky one: about 27% of those avoid going to the gym due to concerns about the cleanliness, germs, and unknown personal hygiene of previo…
/r/seduction20/04/26 06:18 AM
1

Of course, now I understand: fan fiction. This idea comes from fanfiction based on a combination Harry Potter, Fifty Shades of Grey, and Dr. Who.
/r/seduction20/04/26 03:00 AM
-3

It's vastly overrated.
/r/seduction19/04/26 10:40 PM
2

"I quit the gym at 20 and 2 years later, am an alcoholic and happy." I doubt that. You drink because the feelings you have while sober are ones you want to suppress.
/r/seduction19/04/26 10:39 PM
1

"I'm not a life force being like the majority." You got that right.
/r/seduction19/04/26 10:33 PM
1

Well, that cinches it. You're attracting a rare kind of succubus that does her foul deeds in the light of day. Very unusual.
/r/seduction19/04/26 10:32 PM
2

"I have the body of a Roman statue." Which Roman, could it be that of Silenus, "the Old, Drunken Satyr", or Vitellius? If so, that's not good.
/r/seduction19/04/26 10:28 PM
1

I've never had one during a root canal.
/r/seduction19/04/26 10:09 PM
1

Not only "intense"--which I understand--but what is a "supernatural erection", and if it happens generally how does it imply the inspiration for your supernatural erection is a soulmate, since in 10 minutes you can have another supernatural erection with another natural woman? I'm no expert on the occult, but I think there's a natural explanation for what is likely garden-variety tumescence of your dick, which is commonly called a "boner", and which was first referenced in the Boy Scout's Handbo…
/r/seduction19/04/26 10:08 PM
1

Then you are absolutely spot on.
/r/seduction19/04/26 09:49 PM
-5

You can achieve the same benefits with resistance bands, marshal arts training, and even yoga, and you can do those things in your living room. Your body is the only gym you need. Do you think Samurais had a Planet Fitness in their neighborhood?
/r/seduction19/04/26 09:23 PM
-3

And nobody cares if you haven’t masturbated since Jesus was in the third grade or that you can bench press 300 pounds. Here’s something you didn’t know, these world-class athletes did not think “it all began with gyms”: Herschel Walker relied on calisthenics; Bo Jackson claimed he never used weights; Mike Tyson focused on bodyweight exercises (sit-ups, dips, push-ups) and boxing-specific training; Both Rudolph Nuryev and Mikhail Baryshnikov used rigorous ballet training to get bodies most guys w…
/r/seduction19/04/26 09:14 PM
3

“It is 100% necessary for all men and i wont hear otherwise.” Of course you won’t because you’re the epitome of the guy whose only tool is a hammer and thus sees every problem in terms of a nail. Have a drug problem? Addicted to Xanax. Hit the gym. Out of work with a give-day notice taped to your apartment door? Hit the gym. There are much more difficult things to do in the real world than you experience in the f’ing gym: leaving a marriage that isn’t working, holding two jobs and working 70 hou…
/r/seduction19/04/26 08:56 PM
3

I think a lot of people in the “seductive community” love fucking but have issues with women.
/r/seduction19/04/26 05:50 AM
5

This guy is too argumentative by half. Something about his comment doesn’t add up. It almost sounds like incel stuff.
/r/seduction19/04/26 01:01 AM
5

“My Brain, felt that this was, directed at me, but guess i'll never know, i'm just going too assume it was.” There’s your problem (and that of 99% of guys who lament their missed opportunities) There were many things you could have said to this girl including, “How do you rate this?”. Instead of being proactive you shift the blame to the girl. She should say, “You’re cute.” What is stopping you from telling her she’s cute? We know the answer.
/r/seduction19/04/26 12:55 AM
1

Yeah, it’s true. There was a guy named Buckminster Fuller. Do a search. He was suicidal. He asked how he got there: His answer: by believing all the bullshit he had been taught by (wellmeaning) others. He decided to try again with a clean slate, questioning everything. Check out Wikipedia. Descartes decided to doubt every belief that could possibly be false, including his senses and preconceived opinions. He just wanted to obtain one, single, unshakeable certainty. How many of the facts about wo…
/r/seduction18/04/26 11:39 PM
1

Sorry. I don't speak Kneejerk.
/r/seduction18/04/26 10:53 PM
2

I suppose it depends on who you talk to; then, again, I can say with complete conviction I’ve never heard any guy in my circle resort to such an adolescent measuring stick. Then, too, I’m a bottom-line guy. All that ever mattered was how attractive I thought a woman was and how “spongeworthy” she assessed me. If a woman I found uncommonly alluring was attracted to me, I could care less if a guy like you pinned a “6” or a “16” on me. To spin Groucho Marx’s disclaimer, “I wouldn’t put much importa…
/r/seduction18/04/26 10:40 PM
1

“I’m not bragging but I’ve made so many girl squirt had tons of them tell me that I was the best they’ve had.” Maybe you are, just a little?
/r/seduction18/04/26 07:24 PM
1

“What separates women should be character.” And yet you believe there are “5s” and “9s”, as if they can be assigned a score like an olympic gymnast who performed on the balance bar.
/r/seduction18/04/26 06:57 PM
1

You claim you didn’t get feedback about your conversations and that you didn’t have a way to gauge where she stood. That’s because you didn’t use a failsafe way to find out. You could have asked her. Specifically, you could have asked her out. Then, you would have had your feedback. Instead, you built an app. I think you missed the point of conversing with women you are attracted to: you could be boring, disagreeable, or conversely, a sparkling conversationalist and only one thing counts : to ge…
/r/seduction18/04/26 07:35 AM
1

This is just one more example of someone taking something as basic as breathing and turning it into the equivalent of a social decathlon. You claim you didn’t get feedback about your conversations and you didn’t have a way to gauge where she stood. That’s because you didn’t use a failsafe way to find out. You could have asked her out. Instead, you built an app. I think you missed the point of conversing with women you are attracted to: you could be boring, disagreeable, or conversely, a sparklin…
/r/seduction18/04/26 07:31 AM
8

“It’s important to go on dates with the women you aren’t particularly attracted to because it allows you to Observe your energy, mannerisms, and mindset.” You can’t do this with women you feel attracted to?
/r/seduction18/04/26 07:00 AM
9

So, get your “reps” in with girls who test your skills and you have to negotiate “real world” variables like anxiety and hyper-vigilance. When I played baseball in college the coach had us take batting practice against a former AAA pitcher, not some guy on the J.V. This option suggests lack of confidence and here’s the downside: if you get spanked by a chess player with a rating of 1,000 how are you going to fare against one rated at 1,800 or 2,000?
/r/seduction18/04/26 06:57 AM
3

Wise words. She can be looking at the wall, or the guy behind you.
/r/seduction17/04/26 08:44 PM
5

That’s it. I once had a woman eyeball me like a cat watching a mouse. She walked over to me and said, “What the fuck are you looking at?” I said, “I’m sorry. I thought you were Mary Poppins.”
/r/seduction17/04/26 08:43 PM
9

Eye contact in itself is vastly overrated and must be considered as a single element in a complex of non-verbal behavior.
/r/seduction17/04/26 10:11 AM
1

They don’t end randomly. As Einstein suggested, what appears random is actually a result of our ignorance of the underlying, orderly variables. You fell into a common trap we all do at one time or another: operating from a false syllogism (with a false premise): A girl having a good time on a date with me is a reliable indication she will go out with me again. A girl had a good time with me, Therefore, she will go out with me again. Operating from a faulty premise kills more people than guns.
/r/seduction17/04/26 12:48 AM
1

To state the obvious, you weren’t there. So, where is the evidence of “delusion”? Had he noted she said, “Pre marital sex is satanic” or “There’s no way to avoid getting pregnant”, you’d have a point since that clearly is delusional, but “I need to think it over…I need to feel valued… .” That’s delusional? Furthermore, you don’t know jack shit about either of them. How long have they been going out together? A week? A year? She’s a virgin. What’s his story? Does he want a relationship or just so…
/r/seduction16/04/26 06:56 PM
1

“Purity and virginity are not valuable, this is the truth, not manipulation.” And where is that written except in your own creed? If you strip away the loaded language and look at it more neutrally, there are legitimate medical, social, and psychological arguments that can be, and have been made in favor of sexual restraint or placing value on a limited sexual history. My wife before switching specialties was OBY, so I put it to her: was there evidence-based support in favor of virginity before …
/r/seduction16/04/26 06:08 PM
-1

I’m not talking about discussing abortion, I’m talking about using stealth means to change one’s beliefs about it. Since there are atheists who don’t find it an acceptable option, it’s myopic to claim its cause is always idiotic religious reasons”. I’m not religious, pro life, and don’t give a damn what the Vatican has to say about it. Similarly, if, hypothetically, the Eriksonian technique of covert suggestion were efficacious in changing another’s belief about shoplifting, would it be ethical …
/r/seduction16/04/26 04:55 PM
1

It doesn’t matter how she came by her belief about premarital sex. Wanting to “feel special” or waiting until marriage are hardly preferences that require countermeasures to change like she’s being rescued from a cult. Would he have the right to furtively induce her to have an abortion if she were pregnant? There are too damn many of these kinds of requests by morally challenged guys, i.e., “How can I get this woman to agree to an affair?”, “How can I get this girl to agree to a menage a’ tois?”…
/r/seduction16/04/26 04:28 PM
18

"But her concept of what a relationship was is warped." She should be very fortunate she has you to help her jettison the values she has--an objective guy, devoid of any self-satisfying motives, who will instruct her on what a true relationship is.
/r/seduction16/04/26 06:30 AM
7

No, it's an abstraction, like the sound barrier was until Chuck Yaeger proved it to be one. There was no barrier in the atmosphere that prevented flight in excess of 767mph at sea level. A woman's "fuckable line" can be one place today and another tomorrow. A friend of mine, short, redhaired, freckled, and with skin the color of a cow's udder, was madly in love with a woman named Gina, who, if she said it once, said it fifty times: her type was tall, dark, and olive-skinned. We advised him to fo…
/r/seduction16/04/26 06:19 AM
1

e m
/r/seduction16/04/26 05:39 AM
2

Why the hell would a lot of people think Reddit Seduction is a gateway into a closed ward?
/r/seduction15/04/26 12:31 PM
1

Fair, enough. I’ll take it down to your level: “Never debate Dr. Seuss with a dog. You just frustrate yourself and piss off the dog.”
/r/seduction15/04/26 06:54 AM
3

Here’s a radical thought: instead of trying to figure out a queue on a machine, suggest you get together OUTSIDE the gym. It seems like you’re taking extreme measures to avoid the question that has to be asked.
/r/seduction15/04/26 06:35 AM
1

I’ve forgotten to take the advice a friend once gave me: “Never debate Shakespeare with a dog. You just frustrate yourself and piss off the dog.” I would also add, “Never waste time engaging a person who “likes to keep their comments hidden.”
/r/seduction15/04/26 05:39 AM
1

There is as much concrete, verifiable evidence for a coordinated psyop campaign to make “dad bods” attractive as there is for the idea that the moon landing was staged, The CIA was behind 9/11, the Illuminati is behind the high price of eggs, extraterrestrials built the pyramids, Abraham Lincoln was gay, and that the earth is as flat as an EEG printout of your brainwaves. In other words: none. Just vibes, suspicion, and the default rebuttal of the ignorant: “I refuse to believe it, so it can’t b…
/r/seduction15/04/26 01:29 AM
4

Good call. If that’s the case, he’ll get another chance.
/r/seduction14/04/26 05:36 AM
-2

Do you really need what looks like more than 500 words to elaborate on what you summarized in less than 20? You invest God-only-knows how much time in that derivative magnus opus, I’m one of only two people that give you the courtesy of acknowledging it, and you bitch about it. It’s gone. Your loss. Maybe someday you’ll get that a half hour with great literature or other celebrated works of art can teach you more than a year with “Models”.
/r/seduction14/04/26 02:35 AM
-1

The best way? That hasn’t changed in a thousand years. Become older, become successful, and become comfortable in your own skin. If you really want to attract older and more urbane women, try to view them with the reverence great painters like Rubens, Gustave Klimpt, or Egon Schiele did—as complex human beings, rather than objects of transient interest. Then, too, Gustave Flaubert has a lot to teach men about women. A game changer for me was Pablo Neruda’s Twenty Love Poems and a Song of Despair…
/r/seduction13/04/26 11:51 PM
2

“Game is about putting out the best version of yourself and standing out from 99% of everyone else.” That’s the sales pitch but like the airline whose slogan was “We’re #1 to the sun”, it ain’t necessarily so. I bet I could ask a hundred lamenting virgins, “I’ll make you an offer. I can get you to have sex this weekend with a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader, just as you are, warts and all, or I could make you your best self in two years. Which do you want?” Ninety nine would go with the cheerleader a…
/r/seduction13/04/26 11:25 PM
1

Not knowing whether your “Isn’t that ridiculous” alludes to the opportunistic contradiction in that pivot or my citing it, I suggest you read Manson’s first-person “My Life as a Pickup Artist” on “The Good Man Report”, December 25th, 2011. (It is subtitled “You don’t sell your soul to the devil, unless a part of you is already dead inside”. But there’s more. Manson’s time line for his career in “Models” doesn’t add up. He claims he was already coaching guys as early as 2004 or 2005. But in the a…
/r/seduction13/04/26 10:13 PM
1

Manson piggybacked his involvement as a member in good standing of a predatory group of sexual compulsives into a cottage industry. Give him and others like Neil Strauss credit: they sensed the ship would founder and abandoned it, seemingly getting religion. Manson, after allegedly getting “massive sex” had an epiphany. In a 2011 article, he described his lifestyle in the PUA scene as living on a friend's couch, being broke, and wasting hours on "alcohol, a vagina or a television screen.” And wh…
/r/seduction13/04/26 07:13 PM
1

No doubt. Having a BMI of 18 will open more bedroom doors than having one of 45–unless money and status matter more to a particular woman than aesthetics. By the time I was what I assume your age is—mid 20s—it seemed to me there was one attribute a guy could possess that was almost a universal: guys who believed any woman could be won were the most successful. By the rules thought necessary by today’s PUAs they had it all wrong but still got it right.
/r/seduction13/04/26 05:53 PM
1

On this sub, you can’t assume much. Your experience is hardly a universal one. Everyday some guy gives his vitals—which include going to the gym—only as a preamble to ask why he’s still shooting blanks with women.
/r/seduction13/04/26 05:39 PM
1

And that was the only thing you changed? Just going to the gym? So many times a person says something like “This 5:1 diet is amazing! I’ve lost 20 lbs in two months! You then ask them if they made any other changes and they say, “Just cutting out sugar, walking two miles a day, going to bed at 10 o’clock, and drinking a lot more water.”
/r/seduction13/04/26 05:31 PM
1

We are hardwired to acclimate to whatever novel pleasure we are experiencing. It’s called the Hedonic Treadmill and it’s inescapable; the new car, the new house—everything gets old. Knowing that, why would anyone accelerate sex becoming boring by chasing promiscuity?
/r/seduction13/04/26 10:08 AM
1

Wrong. Do you want me to write it again? Have it your way. Here’s a repost, not verbatim, but close enough, Men, such as you, treat LMR (Last Minute Resistance) as something other than a straightforward refusal of sex. It is merely an obstacle to overcome, a speed bump on the road to sex. A woman’s resistance is not seen as a genuine boundary, it is redefined as a nuisance, something to overcome, a hurdle of sorts. Consequently, the woman who, at a certain point, taps the brakes, is reframed as …
/r/seduction13/04/26 06:24 AM
0

Damn. I accidently deleted the comment instead of merely editing it. No matter. You didn't contest a single thing I wrote, or the gist of it. When it suits you, you adhere to the meaning of the word "No." When it doesn't, in the case of seduction, it means whatever you wish it to mean. Got it.
/r/seduction13/04/26 12:10 AM
1

That kind of gambit is just one more variation on the theme that there’s a key to fit every lock. There seems to be an inverse correlation between the need to use a pre-packaged opener with a woman and success with women.
/r/seduction12/04/26 09:33 PM
-1

Why do so many guys think going to the gym is the answer to success with women when 75% of people don’t belong to a gym? You claim nothing works if you’re not her type but hit the gym so she’ll increase the chances she’ll “feel you” whatever the hell that means. Furthermore, a recent survey by Dating.com indicated something counterintuitive: almost 75 percent of singles prefer the “Dad Bod”, the body that appears a bit soft and just a little overweight? Why? Because they suggest to women a guy w…
/r/seduction12/04/26 09:28 PM
1

I’m sure you’ll figure it out. I do think many men and women offer or accept dates with a nebulous idea of potential possibility, assuming their counterpart is doing the same. Exceptions might be guys who just want to lose their virginity, get laid, or pad their lay count.
/r/seduction12/04/26 04:47 AM
2

He fails to take into account there may be many good reasons to intermittently check one's cell phone during breaks: you might be waiting for a message from a doctor, checking Flightaware for the status of an incoming flight, etc. But c'mon. "Honey, you look bushed. Tough day? Jim Janson and Mike Tabochnik called in sick so I had to take care of their deliveries. I never stopped running all day." "O.K., but what did you do on your break?" "I checked how my Fantasy Football team was doing." "Well…
/r/seduction12/04/26 12:56 AM
2

There's your answer, as I suspected. If you are just after fun, you should express that before the first date to see if she's good with it.
/r/seduction11/04/26 08:21 PM
3

Are you telling them that right out of the box--or at a strategic moment--and if you are not candid about that from the start, why not? It's one thing to tack it on when you are angling for the first date, another after "first sex".
/r/seduction11/04/26 08:19 PM
3

This is the major hole in every dating coach’s playbook: dig deep enough and they have a tweak for everything: for one, it’s just make 1,000 approaches (or 10,000); for another, it’s “don’t focus on results”. Still a another says, “Read ‘Models’”, or “No More Mr. Nice Guy”. Perhaps the most popular trope is “Get into the gym”. You are right, of course: the guy is prospecting but how anyone can pay this guy even $5.00 if they watch his videos is beyond me.
/r/seduction11/04/26 08:09 PM
3

This guy (the dating coach) really went off into the tall grass with this one. I can imagine him telling a landscaper or construction worker who works 12 hours in high-humidity, 90-degree temperatures, and then fights for standing room on “Q” train to Brooklyn, “Just stop checking your cell phone.” How can anyone be so out-of- touch with such a common human experience of as being wiped out by the daily grind. “I gets weary and I’m sick of tryin’ Tired of livin’ but scared of dyin’” Just monitor …
/r/seduction11/04/26 07:36 PM
12

Feeling gassed after work is NOT the result of Dopamine depletion. People have dragged their asses home after work since slaves built the pyramids. Job stress and fatigue are strongly correlated. An air traffic controller who needs to take a nap after pulling a shift during which he pushed heavy metal around the skies of New York, New Jersey, and Connecticut, is not nodding off because he checked his messages in the break room; nor is the second-year resident who spent 12 hours in the E.R. on Ne…
/r/seduction11/04/26 07:26 PM
1

I do not recall that number as being cited in the study. Rather, it was stated by the narrator as a hypothetical reason why flirting was not detected. As you point out, the number is suspect. Worse, it’s a relic from a debunked study by Albert Mehrabian in 1967. No matter what the reason is, flirting is not a universal solvent in attraction. And while science may not be necessary to explain why it often falls flat, in this case it has illuminated something very interesting: only 1:5 or 1:6 women…
/r/seduction11/04/26 10:35 AM
2

Did it ever occur to you that flirting is vastly overrated and not a Swiss Army Knife that can be used with every girl, or even most, in all situations? Has anyone told you that it is notoriously difficult for a stranger to detect when we are flirting? A study examined in the article “Accurately Detecting Flirting: Error Management Theory, the Traditional Sex Script, and Flirting Base Rate” (Communication, 2014) found 80% accuracyamong participants when detecting when their counterpart was NOT f…
/r/seduction11/04/26 07:35 AM
1

Who’s keeping score? I’ll ask you. If some girl you were attracted to was overheard saying she had no interest in you but was only using you to entice other guys, would you like a winner? The degree some guys will go to in order to attract women is astonishing.
/r/seduction11/04/26 06:58 AM
1

I’m not questioning the tactic’s efficacy, merely it’s decency. Imagine a girl point-blanked you and at the end of the night said, “I just befriended you to get other guys.”
/r/seduction10/04/26 08:45 PM
1

And ALWAYS being convert is pure Eric Markovic nonsense.
/r/seduction10/04/26 03:41 PM
1

It may be surprisingly effective but using one girl who you have no interest in as bait to lure others is typical Owen Cook B.S., which tells you how he really feels about women: when it suits him they are cannon fodder.
/r/seduction10/04/26 03:37 PM
1

My mistake: “AS IF she were common and not worthy of more than a compliment.”
/r/seduction10/04/26 03:24 PM
1

You might find Dan Gilbert’s talk on “Happiness” interesting. It’s a Ted Talk, one of the best. Among other things his research has resulted in some findings about happiness that are far from intuitive. These are the kinds of instructors those struggling with meeting women need (his talk is not about dating or seduction) and he is not a PUA or dating coach. He’s a researcher on faculty at Harvard. https://youtu.be/4q1dgn_C0AU?si=hglyBkEgoklDTO15
/r/seduction10/04/26 07:31 AM
1

Anyone who can compliment a girl without later declaring her as common and not worth a minute of his time is doing far better in ways beyond your ability to comprehend.
/r/seduction10/04/26 02:52 AM
1

And, if true, than spitting on the one he complimented by insinuating she was of little value.
/r/seduction10/04/26 02:50 AM
2

You totally lost any credibility with me (not that you care) when, after likely spraining your wrists high-fiving yourself, you played the machismo card by alluding to the girl you complimented as “a dime a dozen”, not worth more of your precious time than a compliment, which in the end was misogynist bullshit. How much of her time do you think she or any girl would invest in you if out of earshot you muttered to your friend, “she’s not worth anything more than that”?
/r/seduction10/04/26 02:47 AM
0

“fun is synonymous with bad” No, a thousand times, no. Tension, unpredictability, and loutish behavior are often seen in “bad boys”, and those qualities are hardly fun.
/r/seduction10/04/26 02:36 AM
1

That’s the gospel according to Robert Glover. Everyone I encountered merely believed the old saw that said, “You catch more bees with honey than with vinegar.” And I wonder: has any therapist ever wrote a book titled, “No More Bad Boys”. Why do those guys get a pass?”
/r/seduction09/04/26 09:01 PM
1

Absolutely. Winning sometimes is a curse. “Even victors are by victory undone.” —Dryden
/r/seduction09/04/26 08:55 PM
9

Glover pulled off a tried-and-true gambit: he created a disease and market the cure. His theoretical “nice guy syndrome” is supported with anecdotes of interviews with his own clients, none of which are verified by another clinician. His book does not include a bibliography, a single reference to a study, survey, or opinion of any other professional in the field. In fact, in the 216 pages of his book, if my memory is correct, he mentions only two sources to support his theory: Robert Bly, a poet…
/r/seduction09/04/26 05:47 PM
1

The entirety of it in less than 75 words. Of course, you can’t earn much from a book that contains 299 blank pages and one that says, JUST TALK TO HER!
/r/seduction09/04/26 03:00 PM
1

Right. I’ll go one step further. Read “The Monkey’s Paw” by W.W. Jacobs. It’s a classic horror story that addresses among other things the caution about getting what you wish for. I once was hell-bent on seducing a girl who had rejected me. I pulled it off and the day came when I wished she had blown me off. What a freaking nightmare it became! You never know. The Twilight Zone ran an episode titled “The Chaser”. A man nails the woman of his dreams only to pay a huge price to be free of her.” Wa…
/r/seduction09/04/26 07:03 AM
2

Been there. If you see someone uncommonly attractive on the #1 train between 5Oth and 42nd street, and she positions herself by the door, you don’t have much time to assess the situation. However, if you’re in business class (or even main cabin) on a nonstop flight from Dallas to JFK and you’re over Little Rock you have three hours to assess the situation. The O.P. doesn’t make an attempt to distinguish between the two situations. His rules are ridiculous. At the top of the list, should a guy in…
/r/seduction08/04/26 10:55 PM
-8

No. A 45% bump in Testosterone does not make you pulse with some sort of erotic light. What they might perceive is desperation.
/r/seduction08/04/26 09:26 PM
-5

Only temporarily. Masturbation and/or ejaculation does/do not significantly lower testosterone levels over the long term. Abstaining, after a week or so, bumps “T” up about 45% on average and then returns to baseline.
/r/seduction08/04/26 09:22 PM
-1

So, basically, it increased impulsivity and propelled you to women who you wouldn’t have approached if not abstaining. That doesn’t seem like much of a perk since you’re putting yourself at risk for an STD or other unappealing consequences.
/r/seduction08/04/26 09:19 PM
4

That’s a potentially dangerous generalization. As pilots we have a maxim we live by for many emergencies: “no fast hands”. There are times when acting quickly will doom you. Conversely, there are situations when calm analysis saves you. It’s no different at times with approaching women: sizing up the situation can lead to success where a lack of hesitancy wouldn’t.
/r/seduction08/04/26 08:29 PM
1

I’m not talking about randomness. As I pointed out in two other examples transformation need not require months or countless reps. Consider the baseball example. I was one of our state’s youngest hitters. I faced four or five pitchers a year who scared the beJesus out of me. In a few minutes of coaching, a simple tweak of my stance allowed me to face him with confidence. I got a game-winning double and never feared any of those bad boys again. It’s important to note that my coach was not some gu…
/r/seduction08/04/26 08:19 PM
3

In many cases months of “massive action” are not needed to eliminate any fear or phobia. That in itself is a limiting belief and one of the more limiting ones. There is a phenomenon known as “corrective emotional experience", whereby a new, safe, or positive encounter directly contradicts and overrides a previous traumatic or fearful memory. It is not uncommon. I see it routinely in a “Fear of Flying” program. I experienced it myself when I was in my early twenties. I was incredibly intimidated …
/r/seduction08/04/26 07:30 PM
1

I doubt it.
/r/seduction08/04/26 05:09 PM
-3

It’s beyond audacity, Bunny. It suggests some sort of arrested development—perhaps the high-school cafeteria stage when a teenage guy attempted to prove his masculinity by ridiculing some unfortunate, unpopular kid. And of all the ironies—the most obvious being this clown was rejected by a girl he thought was easy pickings—none is more ironic than his belief that he has more “value” than one who swatted him away like an annoying mosquito. He is clearly oblivious to the fact that guys who know th…
/r/seduction08/04/26 10:08 AM
2

Translation: “That which I can’t have wasn’t worth shit anyway.”
/r/seduction08/04/26 06:59 AM
3

“So treat everyone like they are fatties below you.” Check back and see how that is working for you in ten or twenty years. Pull up a few photos of Mickey Rourke, Val Kilmer, and Matthew Perry. You think that can’t happen to you? A lot of people think that about cancer or ALS. A few random bad breaks and you might become the “fattie” you treat others like.
/r/seduction08/04/26 06:44 AM
1

Why eliminate the ego (if you consider that to be pride)? Do you think Tom Brady or David Beckham left their ego in the locker room and that Brady didn’t feel like shit if he threw an interception in the Super Bowl—or David Beckham didn’t take it personally if he had a crucial penalty miss? You can even make the case that their “attachment” to failure was essential to their greatness. I believe it was Mike Bossy, a member of the four consecutive championship Islander teams, who claimed their suc…
/r/seduction08/04/26 06:35 AM
1

You’re right. I sincerely apologize. I’m terminally old school and wince every time I read a comment by a frustrated or disappointed guy who does everything by the literal “book” and still is disappointed—or worse, looking for answers. My rancor is not directed at you it’s displaced from the real source of my frustration: the self-anointed gurus who package junk science as the Holy Grail of dating. (That’s their default title now: “Dating Coach” since “Pickup Artist” began to have unsavory impli…
/r/seduction07/04/26 11:39 PM
1

I don’t care what it sounds like to you. Even if it was (or is) pedestaling, which it certainly isn’t, better men than you have sung the praises of their women and expressed gratitude for them: Paul Newman, Johnny Cash, Ronald Reagan, Denzel Washington, George Bush, John Glenn, Mel Brooks, Tom Hanks, Kevin Bacon, George Clooney…and more. Gratitude, in every nook and cranny of human experience, is the ultimate social lubricant and when sincerely conveyed can achieve just as much or more than “KIN…
/r/seduction07/04/26 09:19 PM
7

If a woman doesn't find you attractive, you can have the confidence of Tom Brady and it won't make a difference. Confidence may be a spice, but it's not the main course. On the other hand, as I experienced, I could be a quivering wreck and if the girl was into me, she didn't seem to care, "It's o.k... . It will be fine... .", etc; The most amazing girl I ever met reduced me to jelly with legs, and in the end, it didn't make a difference. We wound up living together and having a robust sex life. …
/r/seduction07/04/26 11:03 AM
5

So, for those keeping score at home, you invite a girl to dinner and immediately go into seduction mode. Is that about it? You want a hug, not to express affection or cordiality or even to reassure her that she's in good hands, no pun intended, because it's putting your foot on the first rung of the escalation ladder. I'm guessing you aren't even slightly aware of how tawdry that is. On top of that, you see it as a liability that she is sitting across the table from you. Here's a suggestion: ins…
/r/seduction07/04/26 04:10 AM
2

This thread is the strangest one I've ever read. I've rarely read a comment by a guy who is so hell-bent on accepting the bottom-line you have pointed out. I'll take it a step further: He wants a relationship (friendship, even thought they are attracted to each other) solely on his terms, where she remains "close by" but not as close as she wants. "I don't want you in my bed but you can crash on my couch anytime." That's pretty much it.
/r/seduction06/04/26 10:39 PM
2

It’s almost a lock that he’s concealing a lot. His original comment is a sinkhole of innuendo and insinuation without any specifics. He wasn’t pleased when I suggested he was taking gaslighting to a new level.
/r/seduction06/04/26 09:08 PM
5

You’re missing something critical and telling: she wants to take it to the next level, he not only doesn’t want to, but wants a cunning way to make her feel like that option is her idea. Let’s take it to an extreme: a woman is pregnant. She wants the baby, the father doesn’t. He wants an abortion and asks a therapist, “Is there a painless way to make her believe the abortion is her idea?” Now, counsel me (as the hypothetical father) on that. It’s extreme as I said. Where is the line in the sand?…
/r/seduction06/04/26 08:44 PM
6

I really dislike Robert Glover’s “No More Mr. Nice Guy”, but give him credit: the OP is precisely the species of “nice guy” Glover exposes: the kind who gives the rest of us a bad name: the nice guy who comes bearing flowers in one hand, while behind his back the other hand conceals brass knuckles.
/r/seduction06/04/26 08:34 PM
2

You say “our relationship”, describe at as ”almost soul-like”, and then claim it is not “a thing”. Only someone who is a child could think the absence of a declaration, or sexual intimacy negates the existence of a relationship. You have one, and like it or not, you are up to your eyeballs in it. When you cut through the muddled mess of your comment, the bottom line is the same, and it’s unsavory: you want this girl in your life on your terms without considering the emotional fallout she might e…
/r/seduction06/04/26 08:26 PM
3

Hardly a day goes by on this subreddit without someone, usually a few contributors, displaying some degree of coldness and calculation. These guys (for the most part) do not attempt to couch their self-serving motives in mystical claptrap talking about “time lines”, “destiny”, and “soulmates”. They do not end a friendship or affair and scheme to make the girl feel as if it were her choice. This is another level of gaslighting: “I’m done but under no circumstances do I want to experience the ‘neg…
/r/seduction06/04/26 06:11 PM
0

That’s a huge problem. It’s like saying I want to catch fish but hate water, or I like to eat but hate supermarkets and restaurants of any kind. Your best shot is to find a woman who loves playing video games but you’ve really limited options.
/r/seduction05/04/26 11:47 PM
5

“Hunting” is such a ridiculously bad word that speaks volumes about his mindset: women are prey. Pickle is tight. That bullshit attitude is perceptible.
/r/seduction05/04/26 11:50 AM
16

You start off with your vitals indicating that in your model of attraction one’s looks are of primary importance. Do you really believe a girl cares how much you bench press? Apparently, you think that’s important. You then go 0-10 and when you finally get a nibble, you dive right into the PUA playbook: Bad Boy 101: “My name is ———-. Don’t ever forget it.” Then she hits you with the kill shot: “I hope you’re not creepy” which is another way of saying, “You may be creepy, I’m not sure.”. As someo…
/r/seduction05/04/26 11:48 AM
1

Take five. Stop and think about something: you see a girl you’re attracted to. She hasn’t particularly shown signs of interest, but she seems pleasant enough. Why would you think that you had to tell her you have the highest-rated morning-drive radio show in Helsinki to have a positive encounter? Why make up stories? Accountants pick-up women. Librarians do. Even morticians. And they don’t say, “Here’s some free advice: never agree to go to dinner with Steven Spielberg. You’ll wind up paying the…
/r/seduction05/04/26 09:23 AM
1

We don’t agree on everything but, man, when you’re on, you have some A-list advice. Wilhelm could use your help.
/r/seduction05/04/26 09:10 AM
6

You can have the fearlessness of a Navy Seal. If you don’t have much of interest to say after “Hi”, being all “spine” won’t help you.
/r/seduction05/04/26 09:07 AM
1

The original inquiry concerned “fanfics” in conjunction with the word “seduction”, did it not? “It wasn’t about “romance novels”, of which there are many in classic literature. Fanfics. It was about fanfics. Fair enough: I’ll search “fanfics seduction”. The first hit is “Seduction Chapter 1: A fifty shades trilogy fanfic” (We’re not off to an encouraging start when a fanfic author is so enamored with “Fifty Shades” he or she decides to emulate it.”) So, what is happening with this fanfic? A guy …
/r/seduction05/04/26 06:26 AM
1

Excellent observation: one might fantasize about having sex in business class with no chance of being caught, cuffed, and booked. But would it really be as pleasurable and anxiety-free in real life? One other thing: WHO is writing this stuff and why?
/r/seduction05/04/26 04:17 AM
1

Get back under that rock.
/r/seduction04/04/26 05:17 PM
1

Never. I just googled “erotic fanfics” for a sampling. The explicitness surprised me. Way back, as required reading for a course on human sexuality we heard to read excerpts from “Lady Chatterly” and “Fanny Hill”. I did check out a page or two of “Fifty Shades” to see if the writing was as piss poor as someone said. It was, and very encouraging for an aspiring novelist who can’t write. She proved there are millions of readers who won’t care. Absolute trash.
/r/seduction04/04/26 05:07 PM
-4

No, a “maybe” is not a hard-and-fast “no”, just as a “no” is not always a hard and fast “no”. Opinions change. The person who is not interested in what you have to offer today, may pay twice as much for it next week.
/r/seduction04/04/26 08:59 AM
1

Kind of normal—by that I mean, not rare by any means. Porn demands an investment of imagination that is unnecessary with a real partner. The “porn” partner can also have attributes that a real partner lacks, but which are catnip to you.
/r/seduction04/04/26 06:52 AM
1

Major points for candor. It’s fashionable to look down on guys like you who believe abstinence and a porn-free life aren’t prerequisites for superpowers.
/r/seduction04/04/26 06:47 AM
3

What, exactly, are you going to learn from this, let’s say, if you read this typical snippet, “Anastasia stroked a touch along the erection and leaned forward to press her tongue on the tip. She tasted the pre-cum that was seeping out the small opening and it spurred her on to more. Parting her lips, she let the head of the cock slide inside her mouth and she continued to work her tongue on the slick skin as she clamped around the shaft. She let out a muffled groan as she pushed her head lower t…
/r/seduction04/04/26 02:21 AM
6

I personally think it will set a guy back because they are the product of a fevered imagination. It’s better by far to read Edith Wharton or the poems of the great women poets like Emily Dickinson. Hell, if you really want that sort of thing, read Nancy Friday’s “My Secret Garden”, which can be read on Internet Archive. For a classic, consider “Fanny Hill”, which tells the story of a naive, young prostitute, who rises to respectability.
/r/seduction03/04/26 08:29 PM
1

Take this for what it’s worth. My conversational skills were non-existent and public speaking (and talking to women fairly paralyzed me until someone gave me a piece of advice that turned out to be transformative. I was stationed overseas for a year in a place that had little in the way of entertainment. I was advised to immerse myself in reading—not pop-psyche books, not books on pick-up, but the works of the greats. I was given a reading list and at the end of the year, the six-thousand pages …
/r/seduction03/04/26 08:23 PM
2

You might ask him to prove half his clients are autistic.
/r/seduction03/04/26 04:58 PM
2

If it’s staged, it may be scripted by very clever people and the lines canned, which I don’t think it is. If it’s not than you’re asking someone to pul off Ferguson’s exceptional ability to think on his feet—a skill he has honed over 40 years. These guys—i.e., Conan, Ferguson, Letterman, Norm Macdonald, and Johnny Carson have a gift, no less rare than a composer’s or poets. You can’t teach someone to serve up “Chairman of the Bored, B-O-R-E-D,” or to pull off Johnny Carson’s apologetic flirting …
/r/seduction03/04/26 04:31 PM
3

As general advice that is reasonable but without knowing THIS guy’s particular situation how can one merely say, “get a haircut, learn to dance, have a hobby.” Maybe he has a congenital deformity or a face disfigured by accident or disease and needs reconstructive surgery, not therapy. I’ll give you high marks for this: you didn’t suggest that whatever his problem is it can be fixed by making thousands of approaches.
/r/seduction02/04/26 07:06 PM
5

“Make yourself the kind of guy that women would want to be approached by.” O.K., how? And don’t say read this guy’s book or watch that guy’s videos. Those tools teach you mechanics, not how to have a particular woman or women think, “I want him to approach me.” Things get a bit more complicated when you go from the abstract to the particular, and I’m not asking this for myself. I’ve never had “approach anxiety” and a woman’s preference about me approaching her or not was never a consideration.
/r/seduction02/04/26 06:22 PM
2

I always found flirting much easier when I had my top-rated late-night talk show, and I could say to a hot female guest before the show in the "green room" (or have one of my PAs do it), "You've seen the show, Gene is going to offer you a choice between an "awkward pause" and playing the harmonica. Have fun with it. And, remember, it's supposed to be a bit salacious. Don't be afraid to get a little saucy."
/r/seduction02/04/26 03:51 PM
4

As soon as some aspiring Lothario uses the word "simp", I'm on to the next topic. I leave skidmarks doing a 180 if the commenter drags out that tired nonsense of interest equals neediness equals "simp". The idea that one can approach a woman unsolicited anywhere and the woman will not interpret that as interest is laughable. The very fact that you're flirting with her is a major sign of interest, although it is oblique. And insofar as "superpowers go", flirting pales by comparison with the power…
/r/seduction02/04/26 03:43 PM
1

You do realize that even the gold standard of medical research, the double-blind study, is far from reliable? Chance is the snake waiting in the tall weeds. But back to self-report surveys—in this case about preferred traits in a potential date. What is it about something so self-evident (a segment of the population desires a potential partner to be good looking, of a minimum height, or who earns X amount of money, that you find suspect? It is a fact that self-report data is not merely a desirab…
/r/seduction02/04/26 08:51 AM
1

Yes, I am. Are you “seriously” suggesting there are no women who can be manic depressive, engage in self harm, who believe in bizarre things like black magic or satanic rituals, and who just make you feel a little off? Do you want examples. Here’s one: on my second or third date with a very pretty girl named Catherine, she mentioned her boyfriend this way: “Did I tell you what my boyfriend did? (she hadn’t mentioned one). “No. I don’t think so.” “He’s a construction worker. He called up and said…
/r/seduction02/04/26 12:07 AM
1

I lost count of the times you made wild generalizations— “society just naturally expect us men to naturally get it,”, “women can get away with never being labeled the creepy or weird”, “ making someone of the other gender feel uncomfortable, weird, or creeped out, is never an issue for women when interacting with men”, “ It makes us guys feel dumb and stupid and retarded”, etc; (I know from personal experience women do not always get away with “weird behavior”.) I hesitate to suggest anyone seek…
/r/seduction01/04/26 08:59 PM
1

This is one case where using Chat to come up with something to support his ideas about creepiness would have been welcome.
/r/seduction01/04/26 08:28 PM
1

Dave Patrick wasn’t attempting to deduce anything about “actual dating behavior”, merely the importance people put on certain qualities. If 5,000 people out of 6,000 aged 18-25 said “good looks” are desirable in a hypothetical date, it’s not unreasonable to suggest this quality is desirable in a certain number of people in that age group. And that finding should not elicit a How-can-that-be head-scratching response. It’s little different than a survey about one’s preferred sleeping position. Of …
/r/seduction01/04/26 08:24 PM
1

Sorry for the confusion.
/r/seduction01/04/26 07:42 AM
1

If deserving mattered Luigi Mangione wouldn’t be swamped with love letters; Gary Gilmore would have faced the firing squad without a girlfriend, and Charlie Manson would have died a virgin. All you have to do is walk through a pediatric oncology ward to see life is curiously indifferent to who deserves what. When some poor kid is undergoing chemotherapy, somewhere in the Mediterranean there’s a Colombian soaking up the sun on a yacht paid for by the profits from his drug empire.
/r/seduction01/04/26 07:18 AM
1

Bill Parcells, the legendary NFL coach, had an expression: "Don't tell me about the labor; show me the baby." Desmond Morris, the celebrated zoologist, made an airtight case to me that the mating process is hardwired into us by nature. It would have to be. As you suggested, do we really want "floundering magicians wearing Bee Costumes" to bear the burden of keeping the human species alive? Nature has it covered, and if the guys you referred to trusted it, most of their problems would disappear.
/r/seduction01/04/26 02:07 AM
1

I think over the long term, it could bite him. I had a friend who salivated over girls with big breasts. They could look like the flanker on a Rugby team, but if they were well-endowed, he was in. You can guess where this is going. He married a girl who was fine by all reasonable standards. The day came when she found him glued to his iPad devouring vids of women with mammaries the size of Voight basketballs. It got ugly quick. In the best of all possible worlds you experience what Harvard psych…
/r/seduction01/04/26 01:55 AM
2

It took the guy 16 pages that, if necessary, and it isn't, could have been put in one paragraph: three stages of "incidental class", three stages of overt class (seven steps) and then NINE subsequent steps before sex is initiated. This "Ladder" is symptomatic of pickup since Erik Markovick cobbled together his "method", which is even more cumbersome, bloated, and demanding of a beginner. The shyest kid I knew, a 26-year-old virgin, knew nothing of this stuff and, within a month, went from his fi…
/r/seduction31/03/26 09:41 PM
0

Most importantly, for me, I did not ask a girl out unless she was super attractive to me across the board: pretty, smart, modest, funny, and, yes, sexy. Before the first date, I would try to discover something that was of great interest to her. One girl wore a necklace with an Ahnk. She was fascinated by Egyptian mythology and culture and always wanted to see the pyramids. I took her to see the Temple of Dendur in the Met Museum’s Egyptian wing. She had just moved to NYC and did not know about i…
/r/seduction31/03/26 07:42 PM
1

He’s a dating coach The guy actually runs down women on the street, like a cop pulling someone over for running a stop sign. In one video he admits the girl was upset and had to “calm down”. Jeez, I wonder why.
/r/seduction31/03/26 06:59 PM
3

It’s a veiled attempt to reel in clients. The guy is a dating coach. Not long ago he said he was sick—feverish. Despite the fact that COVID is still out there and the flu is still a serious health threat worldwide, he thought having a possibly infectious disease was not reason to forget about chasing women for the night. Think about that for a moment. Doesn’t it merit a “WTF”? This is just one more “What was he thinking?”
/r/seduction31/03/26 06:42 PM
2

There aren’t people seen as universally attractive as anthropologists know, and even within cultures, what is attractive is a moving target that can change generationally. Sadie Thompson was considered glamorous in the 20s, she would have worked for food in the 40s.
/r/seduction31/03/26 01:13 PM
3

Or, as he might put it: “Be your fucking self but don’t give a fuck if you are or you’re not because nobody gives a fuck what you do.”
/r/seduction31/03/26 01:00 PM
5

That guy, Manson, is an absolute fraud; that is, he was all in on being a player until it wasn’t fashionable at which point he had his-come-to-Jesus moment. And if he couldn’t say the word “fuck”, no one would know his name.
/r/seduction31/03/26 12:57 PM
2

That is one of the most honest comments I’ve ever read.
/r/seduction31/03/26 12:51 PM
11

“Deserving” has nothing to do with it. When a woman is attracted to you it’s for her own reasons and not the sticker price you place on yourself.
/r/seduction31/03/26 12:49 PM
14

As a favor to a friend in the entertainment/modeling industry I coached both men and women in doing monologues and what a revelation it was. More times than you would imagine, the woman you see as a “9” feels like a two—or worse. Why do you think beautiful women like Ingar Stevens, Margaux Hemingway, and Cheslie Kryst take their lives or turn to alcohol and other drugs? The mistake people like you make is assigning human beings a number like you’re judging sheep at a county fair. It’s not enough…
/r/seduction31/03/26 12:47 PM
17

Great call. This idea of using girls you're not really into to hone your skills is reprehensible. Here's a novel idea: practice on girls you truly are attracted to and can appreciate. But hold on: that puts one at risk of rejection, and God only knows we can't have that.
/r/seduction31/03/26 07:35 AM
2

First, get rid of the nonsense about not having sex on the first date, your jawline, and abstractons like “frame” and “masculinity,” etc.) Strip it down to the facts: You bought her a gift. 2. She was less than thrilled and was honest about that. 3. She sensed that admission hurt you and when you admitted it did, she apologized. That's not some sort of failure, it's how healthy relationships work. You step on someone's toes innocently or negligently, they say, "ouch", and you apologize. Again, f…
/r/seduction31/03/26 07:25 AM
4

Give it the attention it needs. Encourage it.
/r/seduction31/03/26 12:11 AM
0

Don't try. If you must, then woo with words. It has been my observation that the forty-and-under crowd has mangled the English language, which is that which gave us Shakespeare, Dickens, T.S. Eliot, Yeats, and so many more. This is not to trivialize the beauty of French or Spanish or any other language, but if you want to stand out, begin with fine words, not pretentious words, but words that appeal to the senses, not words spoken to shock or startle. Mark Manson is the poster boy for langauge m…
/r/seduction31/03/26 12:10 AM
8

The OP’s claim is so counterintuitive, so contrary to what we know to be the truth—good looks are coveted for a reason—that you can’t take a word of it seriously.
/r/seduction30/03/26 06:58 PM
8

“ They (good looking guys) rarely get the girl they actually want.” B.S. This guy doesn’t provide a shred of evidence for this absurd claim. He even doubles down on this by taking it further: not only do attractive guys “rarely” get the girl they want, they “end up dating not-so-attractive women.” What proof does he have of this: meeting ONE kid who he knew was a ladies man in middle school. He lost his “mojo”. Fair enough. Maybe he was prone to depression. Maybe drugs or alcohol. Maybe life had…
/r/seduction30/03/26 06:45 PM
1

There was (is) also a movie that became a cult classic: it was the super low budget, “Tao of Steve”. This film was made in 2001 and you can bet your ass Eric Markovick (Mystery), Neil Strauss, Owen Cook, Mark Manson, and the rest of these sages cut their teeth on the film and unapologetically canabalized North’s strategies. You can read about the guy whose life this was based on, Duncan North, by googling “Secrets of the Seducer”. The brilliant thing about “TOS” is that it shows seduction techni…
/r/seduction30/03/26 12:39 PM
1

THAT is clearly NOT essential and seems to be of disproportionate value to wannabe PUAs (particularly in light of the fact that my physiotherapist said a set of resistance bands and a door is all you need for strength training).
/r/seduction30/03/26 12:02 PM
2

And you’d be right: the mature way is to say at the time, “Damn, honey, I’m in an uncomfortable position. I really dislike having to clean up after someone and I hate just as much having to tell someone that and creating a scene.” Waiting for a day or a week IS sucker punching the person. Worse, did the punishment fit the crime? “You left a mess. I don’t want to see you.” That’s a bit draconian.
/r/seduction30/03/26 11:57 AM
1

"Move forward, and if you can't, don't fall backwards." I got that in a fortune cookie with my beef lomain at The Panda House.
/r/seduction30/03/26 06:57 AM
2

Zorba the Greek. It's not about seduction or womanizing. It's a classic about extracting every drop of life out of life. If you can learn how to live believing happiness and sorrow are all inevitable parts of life, seduction is no more difficult than quenching one's thirst. Famous quote: "Life is trouble. Only death is not. To be alive is to undo your belt and look for trouble."
/r/seduction30/03/26 06:48 AM
2

What separates them? Ignorantly believing women can be assigned a value like a diamond. The only difference is that the guys ranting about 10s couldn’t tell the difference between a real diamond and a cubic zirconia.
/r/seduction30/03/26 12:00 AM
-2

So, there’s a tipping point: all 10s are dumb and entitled but most “nines” are good to go. What, exactly, differentiates the nine from a 10?
/r/seduction29/03/26 11:56 PM
3

So, tell me, what is the minimum number of beautiful women YOU need to know personally to claim that by default, former SI swimsuit model Stacey Williams had “her own sense of entitlement”. You, and those who cling to such a belief, are little different than those who claim all Asians excel at math.
/r/seduction29/03/26 11:53 PM
2

You’d like to think that, but, no, “mine” hit the genetic lottery. No one I know said, “She’s just a pretty face.”
/r/seduction29/03/26 11:46 PM
30

The guy warns against trying to be clever and then hits you with, “Fate is comprised of the words fat and ate.” So, I guess “mate” is comprised of mat and ate; “hate” is comprised of hat and ate, and “rate” is comprised of rat and ate. There you go.
/r/seduction29/03/26 11:23 PM
1

How many to conlude most "hot women" have a warped sense of entitlement? Ten? Twenty? When I was in grad school it was department policy not to submit research without a sample size of at least eighty. and there's a reason for that: you begin to get close to being able to establish correlates and causation. Small sample sizes don't tell you much.
/r/seduction29/03/26 10:43 PM
3

I swear we must have gone to the same school. Our "Miss Everything" was not only a 10/10, she was a 10/10, 10/10/, 10/10, 10/10 across the board. Brains, beauty, humility, and most of all, kindness. At the same time, a girl who literally attempted to kick me in the balls and scratch my face for smiling at her was a troll--the kind that lives under a mushroom. I'm with you. It's a given that there is a lot of shit pasted as first-person commentary but I can't believe of the ten or so guys who sai…
/r/seduction29/03/26 10:30 PM
0

Could you go into that in more detail. I think you're agreeing with me that it's a bit much to equate beauty with stupidity but I don't want to misinterpret your comment.
/r/seduction29/03/26 10:24 PM
6

Why would you imagine the attractive woman brings more baggage into a relationship than the girl who may have been teased, often invisible, and possibly shamed? Isn’t that counterintuitive? The sweetest girls I met in school were the prettiest; the nastiest, often the unattractive.
/r/seduction29/03/26 08:44 PM
-2

How is it even possible that not one guy had something positive to say about the experience: it was always the same tired B.S.—they’re self-centered, stupid; they couldn’t spell “cat” if you spotted them the “c” and the “t”. Keeping in mind the whole dumb 1-10 scale is arbitrary (I know girls who rate George Clooney a “6” and Scarlett Johansson, a “5”) I’ve had relationships with two by my standards—and both were wonderful. Intoxicating, in fact. One was an attorney, the other a veterinarian. In…
/r/seduction29/03/26 08:40 PM
1

It's really wasting one's precious time by leaving with nothing but a bad taste in after arriving one hour early.
/r/seduction29/03/26 01:06 PM
1

Hell, top neurosurgeons only require a 30-minute pre-appointment check-in and you may be there to have a plate put in your head.
/r/seduction29/03/26 12:59 PM
2

It seems at times that it's become a nest for a lot of guys who have trouble with women and who follow the advice of God-awful pundits like Robert Glover, who somehow convinced hundreds of thousands of men that their problem was that they were nice guys. It wasn't that they were bathed in sweat when they approached a woman, that they may have been jobless, broke, overweight, poorly dressed, or just garden-variety unattractive, it was that they were too accommodating. They just took too much shit…
/r/seduction29/03/26 12:33 PM
1

Five simple words can work magic: "Hey, it happens. No problem."
/r/seduction29/03/26 12:18 PM
1

There's two problems with that: first, what you consider "a lot of investment", I likely would not, primarily because I don't see it as an investment, any more than I see going to a concert as an investment. I'm looking for a nice evening, not a return, or a quid pro quo. Second, you didn't answer the question. "How does a woman earn a night out that I am offering her as much as for my pleasure as hers? What, precisely, must she do to have earned that, other than saying, "I'd like that."?
/r/seduction29/03/26 09:15 AM
1

What pressure might that be and where’s the proof many women would accept and then do a one-eighty? I’ve never had that hapoen.
/r/seduction29/03/26 08:53 AM
-2

So, in your opinion, a woman has to earn the right to be taken to dinner on the first date? How might she do that? By promising sex in exchange for Wagu beef? And drinks “at best”? Damn, Daddy Warbucks, what’s “at worse”? Attending a street takeover?
/r/seduction29/03/26 08:50 AM
1

Too expensive? Only if you can’t afford it, and explain to me how it is less expensive on the second date.
/r/seduction29/03/26 08:45 AM
5

Give yourself points for not responding to the mouth breather who called you a simp. My job has afforded me the opportunity to see coworkers picked up in sidewalk cafes in Paris, at jewelry counters in Harrah’s and in the Sistine Chapel. The guys interested in them wore Brioni suits, Frette jogging suits, and Arista leather jackets. An invitation to dinner was no more remarkable for them than asking a woman if she cared for a glass of wine. If you balk at asking a woman out to dinner you’re eith…
/r/seduction29/03/26 08:41 AM
5

I can’t say what his orientation is but he’s today’s poster boy for what you aptly described as “pseudo-alpha” posturing. Real strength, also as you implied, doesn’t require a flamethrower to kill a fly.
/r/seduction29/03/26 06:46 AM
16

There’s a sizable slice of members of this community who are so marinated in the “I-am-the-prize” nonsense that they can’t even consider playing the long game. Would he have walked out on an interview if the interviewer acted similarly? How about a doctor’s office, or if a flight had been cancelled? It’s not like this behavior was repeated and predictable. It was their first date. His time is important. Whose isn’t, but he had already unwisely burnt an hour getting to the restaurant an hour earl…
/r/seduction29/03/26 04:52 AM
-7

Only 34 downvotes? That’s encouraging. I thought there would have been at least 50 commenters who put down their copies of “No More Mr. Nice Guy” long enough to weigh in.
/r/seduction29/03/26 04:16 AM
-11

Ah, you can almost feel the air pulsating with that powerful caveman energy. Keep in mind, also “limited” experience is subjective: compared to Warren Beatty, you’re still wet behind the ears. And compared to Wilt Chamberlain, even you with experience that might seem impressive to a college kid, you’re one notch up from a Buddhist monk. But you’re right. I do have limited experience: the typical high school adventures, some dalliances in college, and then it was time to get down to business: mar…
/r/seduction29/03/26 04:12 AM
25

Sound advice is often penalized in this space while testosterone-driven false machismo is high-fived. “Yeah, you showed the bitch. Way to go.”
/r/seduction29/03/26 01:52 AM
-34

No. The lesson is not “Don’t do dinner”; it’s pick them up at their place. This has several advantages: first, you have far more control of the situations and options, if a plan b is necessary; second, if the date goes well, you may be invited up to her apartment; and, third, you may have the opportunity to show how well you handle frustration. As of now, what’s the takeaway?
/r/seduction29/03/26 01:50 AM
2

Your comment is just one more among the hundreds of guys looking for a painless way to a relationship--meaning one that is free of all risk. Not gonna happen. If you're a "romantic" stay that way; if you pour your heart out, do it, but not in the first five minutes after you meet someone.
/r/seduction29/03/26 12:21 AM
2

So true, "Neil just won the Booker Award for his debut novel." Friend. "That must suck. My Harry has just been promoted to assistant copy editor for Megaman Publications." "Never heard of it... ." "It's a startup. The operate out of that Friday's that closed. You know," I was engaged to a guy training to be an astronaut. All that excellence just made me feel so insecure."
/r/seduction28/03/26 11:42 PM
1

And yet another feeble analogy: I've been subjected to analogies about connecting with women that include fishing, mountain climbing, picking a lock, closing a sale, stealth warfare, chasing a bus, playing chess, attacking a fortress, teaching a dog how to sit, keeping a cat interested, Whack a Mole, and now free throws. Aren't you the clever one.
/r/seduction28/03/26 11:38 PM
2

These insights—particularly #9—could have come from Eliot Roger’s Manifesto.
/r/seduction28/03/26 08:16 PM
2

That’s your litmus test for sound advice? There are people, now deceased, who thought handling cobras made sense as a test of faith.
/r/seduction28/03/26 08:12 PM
1

She likely won’t. These guys are the low-hanging fruit that stick forks into toasters, plank on balcony railings, and who play Nyquil Chicken.
/r/seduction28/03/26 08:09 PM
2

“In today's world, no suggestion is crazy enough. Whether it's a social activity, a bedroom invention, or your own conduct of some sort - nothing is off the table. It’s way past time for Reddit to employ bots to sniff out batshit crazy comments, reject them, and suggest they are more appropriate for “reddit/sociopaths”.
/r/seduction28/03/26 08:03 PM
2

How about “do whatever you feel in your own enlightened self-interest will make you a happy, fulfilled human being.” In other words, why do you think your preference for being a bachelor is the best answer for all of us?
/r/seduction28/03/26 07:59 PM
4

What if some of these ideas were the cause, rather than the effect of his problems with whoever the unfortunate woman was? How scary is it 87 apparently clueless guys gave a thumbs up to this comment? Yes, we all have some issues; most of us, however, don’t try to sell our delusions as facts of life.
/r/seduction28/03/26 07:28 PM
3

“Seven” is far and away the most batshit absurd comment I have read on Reddit, including some of my own while buzzed on Percocet for a herniated disk.
/r/seduction28/03/26 07:22 PM
2

How can you not believe in “ Game”? It exists—all those ridiculous maxims: negging, the three-second rule, false-time constraints, creating the illusion of scarcity; they are unfortunately real. And if game doesn’t work for me it’s for the same reason a thousand other things don’t—line chainsaws. I have no need of it. I belong to the countless millions of men who nonetheless had an active dating life, and despite not employing its tactics still had more sex than I ever believed I would with a fe…
/r/seduction28/03/26 07:41 AM
1

I’ve read that experienced users report on average, a 1% to 10% date rate from Instagram DM approaches. I can’t think of many areas in life where a 1:10 chance or a 1:100 chance is considered predictable. Of course, people can get dates with it. My contention is that it is a buffer against immediate rejection for the guy who ask for a girl’s IG and a method women often use to qualify a guy. If this is the world people dating today live in, it’s sad. Personally, if a woman would only give me her …
/r/seduction27/03/26 07:32 PM
1

“And someone riding the Bush probably cares more about social media than other people.” How the hell can you arrive at that conclusion? I used that figure as cited in Forbes. Where is the data to suggest those who take mass transit are more likely to use Instagram?
/r/seduction27/03/26 04:02 PM
1

Fair enough if you stop thinking you’re some kind of martinet who can tell people when to marry and when to have kids. You can date a woman for five years, marry her, and there’s no guarantee you won’t come home and find she’s drowned the kids in the bathtub. Similarly, the kid you have after five years can shoot up a school, while the baby born on the honeymoon can wind up being a doctor treating TB victims in Senegal. And while I wouldn’t recommend truncated courtships, actual does not support…
/r/seduction27/03/26 03:58 PM
1

No, actually, having taught at both the college level I can comprehend using social media. What I can't comprehend is people like you making such ridiculous claims like, "The way to get girls on social media is to observe what they do and then do completely opposite." That's the spine of your "secret weapon". As to "plenty of people finding the guide useful", so what? Many people find astrology useful. Many people go to psychics and find them useful. Every year, about 50% of research done by pro…
/r/seduction27/03/26 10:57 AM
1

I don't like to accuse people of that but after a reponse he gave to one of my comments, the likelihood that the guy who made that comment wrote that treatise appears near zero.
/r/seduction27/03/26 10:30 AM
2

Probably, some, but it seems to me to be the default of someone who wants to ask a woman out bit who doesn't want to do it now. I never found it much fun to meet a girl on a train that would reach Penn Station in 42 minutes and know the clock was running: She could get off at Jamaica or Woodside. You never knew. So, after five minutes of conversation, enough to draw a few conclusions about her, you had to go for it--ask her out. And the system worked well. You either got a yes or a no. Now, it's…
/r/seduction27/03/26 10:28 AM
2

At the risk of nitpicking, where is there a hint that any of this makes a difference? If someone conceived of a weight-loss regimen or a way to beat insomnia, wouldn't some proof be required? The key to getting girls on IG is to observe everything women do, then literally do a 180 turn and do the complete opposite thing. Fair enough. Where is the evidence? If I claimed "The key to getting girls into bed by the third date is to observe everything "simps" do and do the opposite, that would not onl…
/r/seduction27/03/26 10:20 AM
1

Doesn't it seem to you that asking for a girl's Instagram is simply kicking the can down the road--an evasion of the inevitable? These guy's are angling for a date, so why not get it out up front? There is really no solid justification for it. Read the prevailing winds, say you'd like to take her out, and offer a time and place. If she says she doesn't do that, that's your answer: she's not interested. A girl who is attracted to you will not balk at your request. You'll get one green light after…
/r/seduction27/03/26 09:58 AM
1

Somehow, men for at least 2,000 years did fine without social media, Neil Strauss, or Mark Manson. Give these guys credit for one thing: they created a disease and then claimed they had the cure.
/r/seduction27/03/26 09:52 AM
2

"Guides are meant to be bloated little bro." That is one of the most feeble defenses of bad writing I think I've ever heard.
/r/seduction27/03/26 09:49 AM
1

Then you're reading bad literature. As Mozart noted about one of his operas when Emperor Joseph said there were "too many notes", "There are just as many as are needed, no more or no less."
/r/seduction27/03/26 09:48 AM
1

It's possible. I couldn't make it past the third paragraph of this bloated white paper, and yet I just finished the 800 pages of Tolstoi's Anna Karenina. Before that it was the 343 pages of Truman Capote's In Cold Blood, and before that, the 399 pages of Out of Africa, and prior to that, and this one was a tough slog, the almost 1,000 pages of Don Quixote. I suppose it's a matter of priorities, isn't it? Reading literature that has been defined as classics or hunkering down with a lengthy post t…
/r/seduction27/03/26 09:46 AM
2

It depends what you consider worthwhile reading to be. To me, I think mandatory reads should include Zorba the Greek to learn how to live passionately in the present moment, accepting joy, sorrow, heartbreak, and loss(including death) as part of life's "trouble". I would also suggest that reading include Shuster's World's Greatest Letters, so you can get into the minds of the men who shaped Western Civilization. You may discover how they ruled nations and not just a few clubs. You thought this p…
/r/seduction27/03/26 09:33 AM
4

No. "Putting in the work" does not mean reading an unnecessarily bloated white paper on Instagram, and the person who refuses to slog through it is not the one with the problem. Here is why: about half (53% of 18–29 year olds)use Instagram, 25% of 30–49 year olds, and 11% of 50–64 year olds. Put another way, there are roughly 43 to 45 million people aged 18–29 in the United States and only about 20 million use Instagram to date. Judging from the countless remarks on Reddit, it is not a particula…
/r/seduction27/03/26 09:17 AM
2

Instagram is the world's most-popular dating app. How can it be a secret?
/r/seduction27/03/26 09:06 AM
1

Did you miss the fact that he said that he belongs to a church where there are rules. One might be arranged marriages. Another that defines the nature of courting--when, where, how? We cannot impose our standards on others. I think it makes all the sense in the world to sleep with a potential partner before marriage. In other cultures, that will get you killed.
/r/seduction27/03/26 09:04 AM
-1

As long as you see yourself and women as data points on some imaginary scatter plot you’re going to be bucking a strong headwind. Who the hell even came up with such a worthless, dehumanizing idea—that we can assign ourselves and others an arbitrary, completely subjective value like we are judging a goat at a county fair?
/r/seduction26/03/26 05:46 PM
2

What I mean is, unless she is really evil and she doesn’t appear to be since you describe her as “kind and decent”. If that’s true, the day may come when you look back at your time with her as being pretty good. And as you’ve learned, “Once the well is dry, we know the worth of water.”
/r/seduction26/03/26 04:12 AM
2

You are then a talented writer for your age. Keep at it, and insofar as your situation goes, you may discover a liberating truth: this girl, in all likelihood, will be a “walk on” in the story of your life with the one that really is the “leading lady” has yet to appear.
/r/seduction26/03/26 03:42 AM
1

More like the late 90s. They’d need a body bag for me if I engaged in the blood sport that dating is in this decade.
/r/seduction25/03/26 10:15 PM
1

Not for me? You got that right. And, I know better than to think people don’t cheat. The only time it happened to me was when I was young, innocent, and almost comically naive’. Fool me once, you know.
/r/seduction25/03/26 10:12 PM
1

O.K. Now I get it. It seems complicated. I never was in that situation for the very reason you stated. Too much zigging and zagging and as Groucho Marx said, “I wouldn’t want to belong to any club that has me as a member.” If she wants you as an FB, there is likely a few others and then you’re playing STD Roulette.
/r/seduction25/03/26 08:23 PM
2

I didn’t want to hit him with that but “my chaos, her peace”? The kid is 20 and he comes off like Noel Coward.
/r/seduction25/03/26 06:41 PM
3

Excellent observation. The references to a comic-book super-hero might suggest he needs to have both feet planted in this world.
/r/seduction25/03/26 06:38 PM
1

Your biggest problem as I see it is not shouldering the blame for your screw-ups. Well, who is to blame? The girl? Her friends? When I was in a situation like yours, the wisest man I knew, a prof, said “Take the blame for everything; it’s the only way to find peace and be free. He was right. Smart man. Did she walk away? My fault. I chose unwisely. Now, the bad news: yes, there are some losses you take to the grave. Failures, missed opportunities. The memories of the times we hurt others. The wo…
/r/seduction25/03/26 06:36 PM
1

So, you’re saying that if a guy sees someone like no other he has ever met and asks for a little help, he is out of luck because he fell in love with one woman. Where is that written?
/r/seduction25/03/26 06:04 PM
3

Nothing says, “Your rejection doesn’t bother me like telling her you screwed another girl.”
/r/seduction25/03/26 05:59 PM
3

Before texting became the default means of communication, you didn’t worry about that. You saw a girl, chatted awhile, got her number, called the next night, and set things up, with the caveat, “You have my number if anything changes.” Given that I always planned sensational dates—i.e., a tea ceremony for a girl who liked Japanese Brush painting, there was never “dead conversation”. If I sensed she loved the date but wasn’t down for an encore, I confided my misgivings to her, “Why do I get the f…
/r/seduction25/03/26 05:13 PM
2

In my case being given the green light from a girl I thought was out of my league was so confidence inspiring, it, my confidence, generalized to every girl. Suddenly, they were all in play. I didn’t abandon my values or morals, it was just so damn liberating to see a knockout, and think, “That could happen.”
/r/seduction25/03/26 01:40 PM
1

Here’s my biggest problem with all these self-anointed gurus: everyday you see posts from guys who are desperate, some very depressed (who knows how close they are to the edge), and when they voice their despair, what do they get all too frequently? “You should be making 50 approaches a month.”. “ DM me, I can help” (a dating coach harvesting students) or some lame tutorial on their failure to calibrate, escalate, and isolate. The last thing they need is to be told to read “Models”. They need to…
/r/seduction25/03/26 01:35 PM
2

Christian Scientists believe matter is unreal; Scientologists believe the ash of incinerated aliens is the cause of all mental and physical illness, and Wiccans believe moon rituals and candle magic can bring you a spouse. Many accomplish great things, not because of these beliefs, but in spite of them.
/r/seduction25/03/26 11:48 AM
1

So many. Mel Brooks talks about how he followed Ann Bancroft around like a puppy. She would be going to a doctor, he wouls say, “That’s where I’m going.”—even if it was a gynecologist.
/r/seduction25/03/26 11:42 AM
1

That is a well thought-out objection Mr. Gambini.
/r/seduction25/03/26 11:39 AM
2

I see “game” as interpersonal scientology. Some people swear by it despite its pseudoscientific underpinnings.
/r/seduction25/03/26 11:37 AM
2

It’s a strange thing: once a woman invites you in, your confidence can soar and you become the initiator. She just primed the pump.
/r/seduction25/03/26 11:34 AM
7

That’s not always true. It wasn’t all that long ago when no one employed game—twenty or so years ago. We all stumbled through approaches, tripped over our tongues, and yet wound up with girlfriends, fiancés, or wives. The fact is, if a woman finds you attractive, she’ll do nine-tenths of the work for you. As my father once said, “When a girl likes you, you don’t have to lie. She’ll lie for you.” There’s no superfan like a girl in love.
/r/seduction25/03/26 02:50 AM
6

Good job. Simple smiling has beneficial health effects and the guy who can make women laugh is already on second base. Ann Bancroft was considered one of the most beautiful women in Hollywood. She didn’t fall for Mel Brooks because of his looks.
/r/seduction25/03/26 02:44 AM
2

I’m far from a guru but you’ve put your finger on something important: “game”, as self-proclaimed pickup Jedis call it, is bloated with odd theories they consider universal law. The magnetism of the quiet, brooding Hamlet is one of them. A few others include: *the three-second rule *the disease of oneitis” *the dangers of expressing interest *the value of wingmen *the need to be a gym rat *the purgatory of the mythical “friendzone” *the general preference for “bad boys” *the need to create the i…
/r/seduction25/03/26 02:41 AM
1

It seemed way past bizarre that anyone would invest hours or days in convincing strangers about how he lured girls to his apartment. That has got to say something and if it’s true this was posted two other times with different names, it is even more bizarre.
/r/seduction24/03/26 11:12 PM
2

So, you’re going to use your ex-girlfriend as a litmus test for how others should respond? Good luck with that.
/r/seduction24/03/26 08:07 PM
1

That says it all, doesn’t it?
/r/seduction24/03/26 07:46 PM
2

Watching that video was like the state you’re in when administered anesthesia to introduce retrograde amnesia. The only takeaway I had was, “Don’t take candy from this man.”
/r/seduction24/03/26 07:45 PM
1

Don’t underestimate his “soft skills”. True, he doesn’t know what “urology” is and his crazy-date-night storing was f’ing boring, but do these things really matter to a woman who will accept an invitation to a stranger’s apartment? Even Ted Bundy had to change the occasional tire.
/r/seduction24/03/26 07:40 PM
1

Maybe not. “Dating”, historically, was a prelude. It was hopefully a step in a process designed to introduce a man and woman to each other. For this guy, it’s a lure—an element in seduction for the sole purpose of getting off. Is there any suggestion that when it’s “mission accomplished with #22 (or “emission accomplished”), that it’s on to #23. And when he’s knee deep in his “process” with #23, will he be blocking calls from #19? What happens when a girl misinterprets his “affection”? Does it g…
/r/seduction24/03/26 07:18 PM
1

Sorry, for the misunderstanding. It is way past lame. Secretly recording a woman to show strangers how “easy” she was is sleazy. How many women would be “down” for knowing they were marketing fodder?
/r/seduction24/03/26 07:00 PM
2

The body-count crap conveniently ignores that there are those of us who pass on sex with girls who some guys bed because they are sexual compulsives. I had a good friend who got laid once a week. I found only one of his successes even marginally attractive.
/r/seduction24/03/26 06:38 PM
1

I have enough experience to know that if a woman finds you suitably attractive, saying you don’t have a car is not a defacto dealbreaker. I also have enough experience to know that saying, “Why don’t we go to Long Beach, grab a slice of pizza at Gino’s, stop at Blockbuster, get “Armageddon”, and then watch it at my place” is just as effective as a lie like , “I tweaked my ankle playing softball and walking is kind of tough. Why don’t you come over and I’ll order sushi.”
/r/seduction24/03/26 06:33 PM
1

The fact that you don’t see that as “lame” is kind of lame. In NYC about half of its residents don’t have a car. I once asked out one of the prettiest girls I’d ever seen. She said, “Yes.” My next question was, “I don’t have a car, we’d have to use yours, is that O.K.? When they find you attractive enough, it’s not an issue.
/r/seduction24/03/26 06:03 PM
2

At the risk of piling up the down votes, I’ll say what I’d bet more than a few women would think about a guy who lies to get women to come to his apartment: it’s creepy. But the real dealbreaker would be what most women would likely think if they knew their private conversations and texts were being used as proof to show how easy it was to seduce them. Yeah, that would go over real well.
/r/seduction24/03/26 05:53 PM
1

It’s not AI. It may be bullshit. But putting so much effort into convincing strangers you’re the second coming of Don Juan is way past bizarre.
/r/seduction24/03/26 05:18 PM
2

Who, Tamara? 5’7” - 5’8”. Caucasian (from Caucasus region).
/r/seduction24/03/26 10:23 AM
1

Absolutely. A woman has one egg a month released for fertilization during her reproductive years. She better choose wisely. It’s astonishing that more than two hundred guys could read this and think, “Yeah, he’s right. These things are essential.”
/r/seduction24/03/26 06:19 AM
1

Gus has confused asking for a date and actually being on a date.
/r/seduction24/03/26 02:55 AM
3

Claim: “When an average guys get laid they’re ALWAYS spreading happiness.” Having read some of this other guy’s “moralizations” this attempt to justify his proclivities is both predictable and ridiculous. Research has shown that a significant percent of women regret one- night stands, casual sex, extramarital affairs, and the circumstances in which they lost their virginity. Men, also, are not exempt from a cloud hanging over certain sexual experiences. And here’s one of the most damning stats t…
/r/seduction23/03/26 06:28 PM
1

Let me share some downvotes: Claim: “When an average guys get laid they’re always spreading happiness.” To who? Let’s just consider one circumstance; the one-night stand. A study by the Norwegian University of Science and Technology suggested that 45% of women regret one night stands. Similarly, sixty-seven percent regret having affairs, and 42 per cent of women say they have regrets about the first time they had sex. That doesn’t sound like happiness “always” follows sex with the “average man” …
/r/seduction23/03/26 05:52 PM
1

Would I be committing a foul, then, if I pointed out at least four assumptions that are at best questionable and at worse, fictions?
/r/seduction23/03/26 05:19 PM
1

Too much truth in that video to get traction in this echo-chamber since he is advising the guy to be that most despicable creature in the eyes of PUA Jedis: a nice, kind, responsible “simp”.
/r/seduction23/03/26 05:11 PM
1

I think the hypocrisy is a much more pernicious kind: you have numerous self-declared pickup gurus telling you about their body count, how they “smashed” an Emirates flight attendant while in Paris, and how they are juggling four Circassian Lezginka dancers. And, of course they have personally helped THOUSANDS of clients when they can’t even provide proof they’ve helped themselves.
/r/seduction23/03/26 05:03 PM
5

I think that’s the second: the first is believing there is a system that can make any woman fall into your arms.
/r/seduction23/03/26 04:54 PM
1

It occurred to me when I was in my early 20s that getting blown out by an absolute stunner was no more painful than being kicked to the curb by a girl who was just o.k. I can’t say I expected a happy ending. I just knew I didn’t want to put up with the knowledge that I didn’t even try. Insofar as “rejection” goes—or the sting of it—to me it was just part of the whole process. I was pretty athletic and understood there would be a lot of times when I struck out in the bottom of the ninth, or shank…
/r/seduction23/03/26 06:29 AM
2

I’m going to make a bold prediction: you’re going to be told that something is wrong with the way you practice “game”. You’ll be advised that you screwed the pooch somehow, while you should be given high marks for accepting the insight you had: maybe there are women who are turned off by unsolicited approaches, unasked for flirting, and displays of what you feel is confidence but they perceive as brazenness. Furthermore, your suggestion that this might be the case will not be received well, as i…
/r/seduction23/03/26 03:33 AM
1

We are outcome dependent from the moment we come kicking and screaming into this world until the moment we depart it. There ae few things we do that are not goal-oriented. The trick is to use the "outcome" as feedback, but only if the link between our actions and the result is clear. Telling a girl, among other things, "I hate cats" is insufficient to assume that's the reason she walked away. If, however, she says, "My best friend is my cat and he died today", you can be fairly certain of what y…
/r/seduction23/03/26 12:34 AM
1

In most areas of life, though, success is measured by the hits you get, the sales you make, or the passes you complete. Not by how many calls you make or passes you attempt. I’m wondering: what would your confidence be if you just really believed one thing: any woman can be won if the circumstances are favorable. How would you feel, if like Gene Kranz, the mission director for Apollo 13, you said, “Failure is not an option”? How would you feel if you saw a girl so remarkable you thought, “Fuck t…
/r/seduction22/03/26 11:04 PM
1

it’s this pitch that too many desperate guys buy into. Like it or not, believe it or not, sometimes, most times, another human being has their own affinities: they want 6’2”, we’re 5’9”. They fantasize about a guy who looks like George Clooney, we remind them of George Constanza. It’s a fact of life and the guy who can accept it without despairing is the one who really has a rock-solid sense of self. And, yes, the designation of “Shit test” to every unfavorable response is ridiculous. Girl: “I’m…
/r/seduction22/03/26 07:56 PM
2

Then give me an ironclad shit-test elicitor, presuming, of course, you’re such a compelling conversationalist that she just doesn’t turn away or walk away. And, for what it’s worth, among the top reasons worldwide why men don’t succeed when approaching a woman isn’t because openers “don’t land” it’s because 1) A woman doesn’t find the guy attractive; 2) She may but she’s in a relationship, and 3) She felt unsafe or uncomfortable because of an overly-aggressive approach, which is basically what y…
/r/seduction22/03/26 07:12 PM
3

And what if she doesn’t take the bait because she is not in any way interested in you or attracted to you. You say, “Nice nails, are they real?” and she responds, “One hundred percent.” Then, you try, “I like your look. It’s really popular. I’ve already seen it with, like, five other girls.” And she replies, “Only five? I would have thought more.” You launch one more salvo, “You’re cute, but you could be really beautiful if you hit the gym.” She comes back with, “Ah, that’s so sweet but I’m good…
/r/seduction22/03/26 04:27 PM
14

“Don't wait for shit tests, force the issue.” How, exactly?
/r/seduction22/03/26 03:54 PM
1

Have any other Hail Mary theories? Would you like a detailed account of what it was like in the moments after 9:15 am when the first sirens could be heard on 9/11? What it was like seeing dazed people walking up from Wall Street to Tribeca covered in ash? Even if I was fifteen then (I was older) I would be 40 or 41, now. Would you prefer a first-person account of seeing Barack Obama report news of Saddam Hussein’s capture two years late? If I was 10 on that night, I would be thirty-three now. I …
/r/seduction22/03/26 07:57 AM
1

I would be the first to call myself “dumb”, if based on a few days in Biloxi, Mississippi, and a few uncomfortable encounters with likely racists, I declared most Mississippians to be illiterate, inbred, snuff-sucking bayou-dwelllers. What is ignorance after all but ignoring everything other than one’s own finite experience or perceptions? The population of Biloxi is about 50,000. I had encounters with maybe 50 people, four of whom were stereotypical, Yankee-hating rednecks. It would take a spec…
/r/seduction22/03/26 04:58 AM
1

Absolutions”? Autocomplete, no doubt, or a wonderful “Norm Crosbyism.”? Here’s the thing, Galton, exceptions, if a certain magnitude, change the average—the mean. As an example, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1,1 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 10. The average ha increased by 56%. The mode, remains the same, however. As to the point being discussed, if someone is going to claim that “most ‘hot women are bad in bed’ or ‘most good looking guys are stupid”, I have the right to express my opinion that there is more than a …
/r/seduction22/03/26 04:43 AM
1

I think desiring women, sometimes to the point of distraction, is quite natural and, in itself, harmless. It's when pursuing them becomes a preoccupation--feeling the need to approach X number in Y period of time. There are at least five or six guys on this board for whom it is a borderline obsession. Gus Olsen is one. He even considered it a strength that he left his apartment, feverish and clearly sick to continue the hunt. Aside from the obvious, COVID is still infecting others, and his indif…
/r/seduction22/03/26 12:10 AM
0

I likely got downvoted by average looking or unattractive guys who only have that card to play. Keep in mind, also, this community is often where uncomfortable truths go to die. As to the asinine claim that most good-looking guys are stupid, some studies, such as research from the London School of Economics (LSE), suggest that physical attractiveness is positively linked to general intelligence, with the correlation being stronger in men. One study found that attractive men had IQs, on average, …
/r/seduction21/03/26 09:42 PM
-4

The quintessential fingerprint of dumbness is to make such a ridiculous generalization: you show me one good looking, stupid guy, I’ll show you one who is quite intelligent. We can start this pissing contest anytime you wish.
/r/seduction21/03/26 09:33 PM
4

You begin by realizing there is nothing to fear. When you were a child you feared the dark. Now you don’t. Why? Because there’s nothing in the dark except what you put there in your imagination.
/r/seduction21/03/26 06:21 PM
-5

That’s an interesting rationalization. That would be like a woman saying, “I find most hot guys are stupid.”
/r/seduction21/03/26 06:14 PM
6

“I’m always gonna think of all the years I was such a loser and always rejected and unwanted by girls.” If that’s true you are in for some long, lonely nights. You are like M.R. James, and J.S. Le Fanu. They wrote ghost stories. The difference between you and them is they knew the stories they wrote were just stories. . You make up a depressing story but forget it’s just a story. You may not be able to rewrite the beginning, but you can change the ending.
/r/seduction21/03/26 06:12 PM
2

There is really only one thing you have to know: there is absolutely nothing to fear. All any woman can do is say, “No.”, and most times, if she does, she is doing you a favor.
/r/seduction21/03/26 06:03 PM
1

The most impactful comments come indirectly. You tell her best friend (or someone close to her) something and that person relays it to her, i.e., Friend. “Is Ellie over her surgery, yet?” You: “Almost. It was a nasty one but you know her she never complains. She’s the strongest person I know.”
/r/seduction21/03/26 05:11 PM
1

All you need is to be that guy once to know it’s great for awhile. But think about this: the one who thinks you are a prize today could be the greatest thing to happen to you or one of the worst. I lived both of those things and discovered it’s vastly overrated. It’s more than enough to be crazy about a girl and learn she feels the same way. You don’t need adoration.
/r/seduction21/03/26 05:57 AM
1

One more time: be specific. Which claim or claims that I have made? Not those of someone else. I’m not going to hold you accountable for someone else’s beliefs. I won’t be held accountable for the claims of anyone but myself.
/r/seduction21/03/26 04:12 AM
1

Be more precise. What claims that I have made; not someone else? Me. I’m not going to ask you to defend things Neil Strauss said. So, what specific claim(s) did I make and in what context?
/r/seduction21/03/26 04:04 AM
0

I have no idea what your question is. So start with that, and articulate it precisely so there’s no room for misunderstanding. Any answer a person can give to a specific question is directly related to the quality of the question.
/r/seduction21/03/26 03:36 AM
2

I agree with much of that. I ignored your side of things which only goes to show I’m not a bot.
/r/seduction21/03/26 12:50 AM
2

F. Scott Fitzgerald said, “The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time.” Start over. Begin impartially. Make the best case you can for “game” and “pickup”, and then make a case against it. Which is the stronger? For me, it’s the obvious truth that billions of men in the world know squat about cold approaches, openers, push pull, kino, calibration, and all that other nonsense, but still, somehow, inexplicably, are able to meet a woma…
/r/seduction20/03/26 07:01 PM
2

So, give me the new paradigm and let’s just ignore that 90% of the comments on sedditt allude to concepts like “escalation, push/pull, the friendzone, “wingmen”, “indicators of interest”, “creating scarcity”, “approach anxiety, and other ideas that Eric Markovic popularized twenty years ago Let’s just pretend that figures like Neil Strauss, Owen Cook, and Mark Manson haven’t “flipped” because the dark underbelly of the pickup movement was exposed and they wanted to distance themselves from the “…
/r/seduction20/03/26 06:40 PM
5

“Game actually is backed by science.” There’s no need to show anyone the research that suggests that after seven hours of involvement with a woman, if there’s no kissing (or physical involvement) you’re dispatched to the “friendzone” as Erik Marcovik claims—because there is none. Nor is there any compelling research which indicates women universally react positively to “negging” or the creation of a “false time constraint”? How about the validity of his “nine phases of the M3 Model”? None. The “…
/r/seduction20/03/26 02:26 PM
1

And what makes you think texting exposes a person’s true nature? I once spent hundred’s of hours actually talking to someone on the phone only to discover her persona was a fraud. And it took less than five minutes. One captured microexpression, one slip of the tongue, was all it took. How was I to know that while we were talking when she was in the bedroom, her boyfriend was passed out on the couch? How could she know that I would capture a glimpse of a small “14” tattooed on her ankle, ask her…
/r/seduction20/03/26 12:42 PM
1

Still, it was typical. “This doesn’t make sense to me, so it can’t be.” Not, “Damn, that’s weird.” And, of course, you’re aware of hybristophilia”, which is why you discounted the possibility. Having been proven wrong and shown that there was a misguided young woman who had a bizarre romantic obsession with Roger you then say, “Well, yeah, but she wasn’t cute.” And if that turned out to be just a bad photo, you’d pivot another way because God forbid, you weren’t as informed, minutia or not, as w…
/r/seduction20/03/26 12:39 PM
1

The suppression of interest dates back to Erik Marcovik, who wrongly believed that an expression of interest killed attraction. There is no empirical proof of this, just as there is no evidence for many of his tenets--i.e., if a man waits longer than seven hours to express desire, he is banished to the friend-zone; that "negging" triggers attraction, as does creating the illusion of "scarcity", or demonstrating social value. This is why there is so much contradiction. Anecdotal evidence is often…
/r/seduction20/03/26 06:43 AM
2

Probably.
/r/seduction20/03/26 03:39 AM
1

Who has attraction down to a science?
/r/seduction20/03/26 03:37 AM
4

It doesn’t help. Five minutes in someone’s presence will tell you more about a them than you’d learn in five hours of texting.
/r/seduction20/03/26 03:33 AM
1

And the fact is, you can't legislate someone else's feelings. Another fact, is the fact that you want to be a good guy. That's a feather in your cap. Many guys could care less.
/r/seduction20/03/26 02:05 AM
1

Truth can be like that. The guys to watch out for aren't the ones suggesting "be careful", they're the ones who say, without reason, "No worries."
/r/seduction20/03/26 02:01 AM
1

If you have to ask the question, you're already in trouble. It's like asking, "Do you guys ever lace your girlfriend's wine to make her more up for sex?"
/r/seduction19/03/26 08:10 PM
1

Yes. Given we have phones what is the point of texting to talk about trivialities? My opinion is that overall, texting is a liability with a steep downside and little upside.
/r/seduction19/03/26 05:08 PM
2

Maybe it’s best just to consider this the collateral damage of being a normal guy and that it’s time to say, “This isn’t working for either of us.”
/r/seduction19/03/26 05:05 PM
1

After he died a girl—a blond—had a Youtube channel. Clearly, she was a bit off. Nonetheless, in a darkened room with candles she would speak of their “marriage”. She wrote poetry to him, even had a cake made for their anniversary.Her Youtube name was "Elliot Supreme Lady", and she was damn cute: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HvsgA7jazo This is not unprecedented. The aberration is known as hybristophilia—women being attracted to violent men. Educate yourself. You can start with a Youtube video…
/r/seduction19/03/26 04:37 PM
1

Did you tell her about the other girl you were dating?
/r/seduction19/03/26 08:24 AM
1

You describe yourself as a “somewhat suitable partner”; You’re “interested” in her (whatever that means), but not “in love” with her.l, and you’re dating someone else, but she’s wasting your time. What the hell is wrong with her? She should jump at the chance to go all in on a guy who is a bit partial to her.
/r/seduction19/03/26 08:22 AM
1

So, you have what you think is a little harmless fun with a girl and when she begins to take it a bit too seriously, you want a hack so you can have your fun without any bothersome consequences? That is, you do the proposal bit to get inside the gates, but you want to know how you can have sex with girls while telling them “but I don’t want or need you getting attached to me.” And they said chivalry was dead.
/r/seduction19/03/26 07:58 AM
2

When are guys in this generation going to wake up and see that five minutes of genuine face-to-face conversation is more revealing than 10 hours of playing footsie with texts?
/r/seduction19/03/26 06:40 AM
6

This is the first collection of comments I’ve ever read that is totally incomprehensible to me.
/r/seduction19/03/26 06:34 AM
3

Sorry. I assumed you wrote that post which would indicate you had exceptional language skills. O.K. You seem quite intelligent but sometimes intelligence can sabotage us. You clearly have read many books and watched many videos on pickup, and perhaps even had coaching. Approaching women is simple even if intimidating but you have made it harder on yourself by believing you have to do 50 things right. Stand this way, talk like that. Imagine you ask someone, “How do I raise my hand?” and he says, …
/r/seduction19/03/26 05:17 AM
2

I’m not going anywhere; I’ve arrived. His narrative is bloated with the lexicon of pickup as made ridiculously overcomplicated by Erik Markovick and his Sancho Paza, Neil Strauss. In this theory there is a precise way to do everything: approach from this direction, stand that way. “ The issue was probably my eye contact and tonality…” “If my torso, distance, eyes, and nervous system were all communicating caution… .” “I would open from a weak distance instead of stepping in enough to make the in…
/r/seduction19/03/26 03:17 AM
1

"Owner and laborer"? I'd like to be a fly on the wall during one of your dates.
/r/seduction19/03/26 01:04 AM
1

Really? Ever hear of Ted Bundy? He was authentically a serial killer. Women swooned over him.
/r/seduction19/03/26 01:01 AM
1

Good job. The great failure of "pickup" is that it champions inauthenticity.
/r/seduction19/03/26 12:59 AM
5

There are no minimum requirements. My brother-in-law is proof of that. The guy looks like Nosferatu on a bad day.
/r/seduction19/03/26 12:57 AM
3

The cosmic tumblers just haven't fallen into place for you--yet. It's just that simple. I had a girl fall for me because I reminded her of her sixth-grade teacher, Charles--the kindest, dearest, most inspiring man she had ever known. Just keep breathing.
/r/seduction19/03/26 12:56 AM
6

That's because in the real world, even serial killers have girl friends. Guys who are jobless get women. Guys who never came within a zip code of a gym and who have bodies like Yoda get women. Friendless guys get women. Boring guys get women. There are no absolutes. Maybe one: being dead, but even then, Elliot Roger had a lovely girl in love with him. The fact that one never knows who will be attracted to them, when, or where, should keep anyone hopeful.
/r/seduction19/03/26 12:52 AM
4

I think "just be yourself" suggests, don't engage in spasms to be someone you're not. The common term in couples counselling is "accommodation". If you're not comfortable, let's say, with paragliding, please be honest about it. If you think Jesus is lord, don't sasy otherwise to curry favor. THAT's the kind of integrity that helps any guy, whether he's had sex a hundred times or never, because the day will come when a woman finds that both admirable and brave.
/r/seduction19/03/26 12:41 AM
4

The main issue is that you are one more casualty of what I call "Straussian seduction."Put another way, for the man whose only tool is a hammer, every problem is seen in terms of a nail. You are handcuffed by a theory of initiating human (male-to-female) contact that is only one of many, and not a very good one at that. But the larger problem is you can't see how it made something commonplace into the equivalent of an assault on Everest's south face, with each step, if a misstep, one that could …
/r/seduction19/03/26 12:34 AM
1

It is a myth when it is manufactured in the absence of true scarcity--the kind you are advising him to create as an illusion--and even in that case it only works if someone is interested in the scarce thing. If a woman could care less about a Hermès Birkin Bags, even if she could afford it, it doesn't matter that there is a two- or three-year wait for one. Similarly, another fake way to play the scarcity card is by making a time-sensitive offer. You've heard the offers: "limited time offer, "lim…
/r/seduction18/03/26 11:38 PM
2

You missed the point. You lock in the date in the book store. THAT’S how you know she’s interested. It’s the way it was done for a hundred years. Then there’s this: interest on Friday may not be there on Saturday. It happens. Furthermore, you’re trying to avoid disappointment—rejection, and texting is hardly insurance against that.
/r/seduction18/03/26 07:02 AM
2

Here we go. The scarcity myth rears its ugly head. Great advice: begin with inauthenticity. And the doctor analogy is awful. All things being equal, if you need to have a suspicious mole checked out, are you going to book an appointment with the doc that can squeeze you in in two days or two months. Then, too, why not seem enthusiastic about meeting up with her? (“I’ve been looking forward to this all day. Your cheerfulness will be a breath of fresh air.”
/r/seduction18/03/26 06:54 AM
3

I don’t get this current generation of men. Why is a specific time and place not designated at the outset? Why is a text an essential step to establish that? “I could talk to you for hours but I’m sure you have things to do. How about continuing this over coffee? Friday’s good for me. “Saturday afternoon is better… .” “That works, too. Just say “where and when.”
/r/seduction18/03/26 06:44 AM
1

You’re suggesting a woman can tell the difference between a man who has not had sex in 12 hours and one that has with a partner, or even a prostitute. This would make him more desirable, which you attribute to pheromones, despite not a single study that has conclusively isolated or identified human sex pheromones (although various researchers have investigated the possibility of their existence). Well, then, the opposite should be true: when I had been overseas for a year—nine months, actually—a…
/r/seduction17/03/26 01:31 PM
1

Thanks for the clarification. I know I am not completely fluent in today’s English.
/r/seduction16/03/26 10:39 PM
4

This guy lost me at “1”: “Good way to up your sex appeal is through finding a meticulous 3 in 1 barber, tattoos, "slutty" clothes, gym and jewelry.” Who, exactly, is going to find sleazy clothes and a buzzcut that makes you look like you’re on leave from Guantanamo Bay attractive? Not, every woman, or even most. Then, there’s this: “When desperate times come, go out and pick someone below your standards in person.” Didn’t he say in the prior sentence, “ALWAYS aim for quality” or did he mean “Alw…
/r/seduction16/03/26 09:41 PM
1

You’re right. More than you know. You missed the boat decades ago. There’s no hope.
/r/seduction16/03/26 04:39 PM
1

I read the book and saying it’s the best book on dating is no better than saying “The Let Them Theory” is the best book on human relations. It only means you’re not all that well read. What do you like me to do with “Models”, address his ridiculous givens one-by-one? Here are a few: “Women don’t even know what they want.” Then he goes on and on about how women want men with “social status and resources”. Do you think if asked a woman might know if she wanted a guy who was good in bed, or dependa…
/r/seduction16/03/26 10:25 AM
1

That’s so God Damn ignorant. I’d like to be on the ISS. I can’t be. I don’t chase it. Common human nature suggests when we can’t have something, we don’t chase it. We move on to pursue something we CAN have.
/r/seduction16/03/26 09:19 AM
1

And your experiences are not to be trusted as s general rule other than mine would be if I said, the more grungy and unkempt I looked, the more girls like me
/r/seduction16/03/26 09:13 AM
1

It’s getting to look that way, isn’it?
/r/seduction16/03/26 09:09 AM
1

It’s beyond absurd to think you “missed the boat” at 28. You possess the most important asset a man can have, time, and you don’t even know it.
/r/seduction16/03/26 09:05 AM
0

The guy appears depressed, painfully so, and your best advice is to read “Models”? How about talking to a pro about his sense of futility and approaching finality?(
/r/seduction16/03/26 08:14 AM
1

Actually, very solid research does not suggest that at sll. Men were placed in photos with s woman who was described either as a friend, sibling, cousin, or boyfriend. While the guy with the girlfriend was rated marginally more desirous than the other three, his bump up the latter did not take him into the category of “very attractive”.
/r/seduction16/03/26 08:08 AM
0

That any results are likely no more than would be achieved by pure chance.
/r/seduction16/03/26 08:03 AM
5

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. At times it’s like Romeo’s instant obsession with Juliet; at other times (and countless people in arranged marriages can attest to this) it is a secondary emotion that is incubated by other qualities: trust, a sense of safety, kindness. My friend, Katie, is a wonderful example of this. She begrudgingly accepted to go on a blind date set ip for her. It was clear this was a bad idea from the start. When the guy came to her house, she saw me to the door after introducing me as …
/r/seduction15/03/26 10:59 PM
5

Not true. When I was in the Air Force I was stationed in a small town. No girlfriends. No indication I was a hot ticket, wanted by “everybody else”. And, yet, she flirted with me. Message received. We dated and eventually became a couple. Is there no end to PUA nonsense, like “scarcity”, which may be important during a famine, but with women? No. The research suggests being seen with other women gives a guy a slight bump in desirability. That’s it.
/r/seduction15/03/26 08:58 PM
10

Not always. Sexual attraction can develop over time, sometimes years, and it’s not necessarily locked in from the start. As the expression goes, “We often don’t fall in love; we march into it.”
/r/seduction15/03/26 08:52 PM
3

You’re eyeball-deep in seduction culture, which, among other things, is superficial, mercurial, and ephemeral. When it proves to be shallow, unpredictable, and transitory, you are left scratching your head. “About 5 months ago I went out with a girl I fell for pretty hard. She was beautiful, great energy, amazing sex, and I really liked her vibe. We went out 3 times and then she randomly ghosted me. That one hit harder than I expected.” Amazing sex? For who? “She randomly ghosted me.” No, just b…
/r/seduction15/03/26 08:29 PM
2

The standard disclaimer of those who think “Game” is the way, the truth, and the life is that “Everyone has a bad day…everyone gets rejected.” Maybe, maybe not—but if you’re a kicker for an NFL team and you’ve missed eight to ten straight field goals, your coach is going to want to know what the problem is. Seduction gurus would suggest you were the problem—somehow—when your experience suggests otherwise: you tried textbook game about 10 times and walked away empty. That’s not the ebb and flow o…
/r/seduction15/03/26 06:51 PM
1

Apparently, with some success. He knows his marks: more than 400 hapless guys who are drawn to this kind of pallaver like cats to cream.
/r/seduction14/03/26 09:56 PM
1

It’s God-awful from top to bottom. Word porn, nothing more.
/r/seduction14/03/26 05:28 PM
2

It occurred to me that this crap might be this guy’s porn—his “Fifty Shades of Grey”.
/r/seduction14/03/26 05:07 PM
1

I doubt he touched it. Read his latest one.
/r/seduction14/03/26 04:58 PM
1

The most unmistakeable way is to ask someone out: not for her “numbers”, not Instagram, out—on a date. If she’s interested, she’ll accept. Although it’s comedy, this bit by Louis C.K. is far closer to reality than all the dumb videos produced by PUA gurus. When you meet her minimal standards, you can break just about every rule and still be in good shape: https://youtu.be/ny3sCjFiLYc
/r/seduction14/03/26 04:54 PM
1

Perhaps, both: AI-generated text to a video. (His latest one is even more egregiously AI. How hard is it to run it through a humanizer?)
/r/seduction14/03/26 04:47 PM
2

I think you're missing the obvious. For reasons that are your own, you are interested romantically and never show it, which should be signalled as early as possible. I don't know who convinced you that this "bad boy" thing is the golden ticket, but it's a fiction. Bad boy or nice guy, you have to express your attraction, or it will likely be assumed you're not.
/r/seduction14/03/26 07:03 AM
6

They are not “fall-back” techniques we use, especially when giving advice. Then there’s this little slip-up: “If you're not having regular sex, then still watch this to the end.” This is a copy-and-paste transcript. There’s nothing illegal about that; lazy, is a better word.
/r/seduction14/03/26 03:17 AM
2

Like anything else, adverbs, participles, metaphors, etc., the use of triplets can be overdone. They’re like flashbacks in script writing: many writers arbitrarily set the number at no more than three. At any rate they are to be used judiciously and only when essential. AI uses the hell out of them. But it’s more than the overuse it’s how. AI loves them as incomplete sentenced, typically without a noun. “”Once you know these, you'll be able to start to truly satisfy her. To get her sexually addi…
/r/seduction14/03/26 02:55 AM
73

Structural quirks. There’s the promiscuous use of “triplets”: “It's not her neck, it's not her tits, it's not even her clit… .”; “tie her hands to the bed, tease her body, go down on her”; “to get tied up, be talked down to, have candle wax poured over their bodies”… . For whatever reason, AI likes this staccato phrasing, and abuses it. Similarly, there’s the, “It’s not A, it’s B” structure overused; “It's not because of the size of their dick or how long they can last. It's simply because they …
/r/seduction13/03/26 04:11 PM
2

“Each week I'm going to teach you how to be the best man you can be.” Not likely, Marcus.
/r/seduction13/03/26 03:45 PM
1

Your point was well-taken and validated in film, music, and stage plays. My uncle said when he was a kid in the mid 60s, neither he or any of his friends had had sex. By the late 70s, as a high school guidance counselor, that had changed. He remembered a very cute junior girl saying, “Well, everyone’s doing it, unless you’re a major loser.” So, again, I don’t get why someone, anyone, thought your comment merited disapproval. Just watch “Woodstock” for God’s sake.
/r/seduction13/03/26 05:32 AM
1

It doesn’t matter in this hypothetical case if he’s an employer or not, Counsellor. She felt offended on the premises of her employment, the manager said he would act on it. If he didn’t and this hapless guy acts on your moronic advice, approaches her on the job, she feels uncomfortable a second time, she can make a case management failed to protect her on the premises from unwanted advances. What you call pessimism is prudence gained from twenty years working with FAs (flight attendants). If on…
/r/seduction13/03/26 01:58 AM
1

It takes Alex Baldwin’s “brass balls” NOT” to always be closing. A friend of mine, a quiet guy, discovered his wife’s affair and told me how he figured he could kill the guy and get away with it. Real Soprano’s “Big Pussy” stuff. I said, after realizing he had just potentially made me an accessory, “That plan sucks! “What’s wrong with it?” “You told me. Now you have to kill me before I tell Dara, who will tell Linda. It gets messy.” I suggested “Plan B”. “Divorce your wife and ask that cashier o…
/r/seduction12/03/26 09:27 PM
1

And, if you have any sense you wouldn’t. Remember, this is the guy who advised saying, “Like what you see?” Try saying it out loud, anyway you like. It is almost impossible to not make it sound, arrogant, snarky, or salacious. Worlds better. “I haven’t seen you here before. You just start? How’s it going?”
/r/seduction12/03/26 09:15 PM
1

What can go wrong? Maybe she’s offended. And do you think two to three seconds constitutes staring, which she would deny? Manager: “How did your first day go?” Her: “Pretty good. One guy sort of creeped me out. You told me to just keep an eye out because of people coming in who aren’t members. I looked at this one guy for maybe two seconds, didn’t smile or come on to him in any way, and he says, “Like what you see?” It was kind of offensive.” Manager. (Thinking, ‘Shit. Now, I have to deal with t…
/r/seduction12/03/26 09:10 PM
1

Yes. You’re overanalyzing it, and engaging in textbook “confirmation bias”—looking for evidence she might have been attracted to you while ignoring evidence she may not be. She didn’t smile. She didn’t attempt to make conversation. Strike one. Not even a gratuitous “Hi.” Strike two. She’s a receptionist. It’s her job to greet members.
/r/seduction12/03/26 08:56 PM
2

It happens to attractive guys. There are lots of unhappily married women out there entertaining the dreams of the everyday housewife. They may have realized they married the wrong guy; they may feel unattractive, unappreciated, and unloved. Trapped. Growing older. Time running out. And a guy like you comes along who hasn’t slept with her five hundred times, who doesn’t have any clue about her less-than-admirable qualities, and it’s game on. It’s bad business anyway you cut it.
/r/seduction12/03/26 08:40 PM
3

I once had a woman come on to me who was a real stunner but she was married. I t happened again not long after. It would have been easy enough to have an affair. Thank God, common sense prevailed and they never happened. Affairs are serious shit. Sometimes potentially deadly. You get high marks for passing on the temptation to take advantage of the woman’s problems.
/r/seduction12/03/26 08:23 PM
-2

Why did someone downvote that comment? This subreddit has opened the doors for some strange ones. They disagree with you anonymously but don’t say why.
/r/seduction12/03/26 03:50 PM
1

Has driving to a supermarket changed? No. The technology many use has changed, but not the fundamentals of driving. Now, those who market seduction advice will attempt to tell you that primal drives instilled in human beings have changed in 10 or 25 years, but nature doesn’t move that fast. Humans have come out of wars, famine, and plague basically the same as they went in. Even the military, which invests months in “breaking down” recruits, does not succeed in effecting lifelong change in most …
/r/seduction12/03/26 03:46 PM
1

I didn’t want to generalize, but if you are to believe them, yes.
/r/seduction12/03/26 03:09 PM
3

As I think of it, there is also a spurious equivalencey being made between women and cats. Like cats, women are supposed to be enticed by the string you make hard to catch. That's not always true with cats. Actually, it's true very little of the time. You never know when a cat is up for a game. I'm all in, though, on your thoughts. Some gurus have carved out a nice income convincing guys who are not in any way attractive that if they just take the time to master "game", no woman is out of reach.
/r/seduction12/03/26 10:19 AM
1

I'm in New York. You're nine hours ahead of me. That's a problem, but if you don't need an immediate response, it's doable. For instance, midnight your time is 3:00 p.m. mine, usually a time when I can shake loose for a bit.
/r/seduction12/03/26 10:10 AM
1

Give me an example of your "nonsensical, meaningless, dumb small talk." And, how exactly, does your body language say "We're in the same bar"? Isn't that pretty much a given--or do you not take anything for granted, like a girl knowing where she is?
/r/seduction12/03/26 10:06 AM
1

Sure.
/r/seduction12/03/26 10:01 AM
1

You aren't even aware of the contradiction in your comment. You claim, "What you say doesn't matter" BUT it has to be "personal and colorful." "Conversation, from street stop to date to lay, should always be emotional and colorful. And all topics become even more emotional and colorful when it’s about you, her, and your relationship. How do you hold that to be true and maintain if you nail eye contact, to cite just one of three things, you can say, "whatever"? Are you suggesting that if your eye…
/r/seduction12/03/26 10:00 AM
2

I don’t see any problem with disclosing feelings. Nor do I see any benefit to the PUA’s reverence of “mystery” or disdain for placing a woman on a pedestal. I’m old school in that way. Among those who committed those sins were many of history’s greatest lovers: Beethoven, Napolean, Mark Antony, Shah Jahan, Peter Abelard, Lord Byron, and, of course, Casanova. The only “mystery” was the degree of their candor. Nothing was withheld, ardent protestations of their devotion and passion were seen as es…
/r/seduction11/03/26 08:36 PM
1

Sure. Where are you located—just to account for time differences.
/r/seduction11/03/26 08:04 PM
1

Wrong. That’s a long debunked myth that evolved from flawed research almost 60 years ago. Content is king. I was reminded of this on Super Bowl Sunday. My aunt had Seattle in a Super Bowl pool (29-13). She could care less about the game and spent the afternoon at the movies. When she returned she said, “Who won?” Her son, my cousin, a diehard Bronco fan, said, dejectedly and almost slumping, “The Seahawks, 29-13.” My aunt squealed like a kid, even though the score was given in funereal tones. If…
/r/seduction11/03/26 08:02 PM
1

“Ghostbusters”. Bill Murray as Dr. Peter Venkman. His “ seduction” of Sigourney Weaver is classic.
/r/seduction11/03/26 05:12 PM
1

The timeless Peter Venkman line.
/r/seduction11/03/26 05:09 PM
1

You’re a better man than I, Gunga Din.
/r/seduction11/03/26 05:07 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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