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NTSpike Archive

View 1 post and 345 comments by NTSpike on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

NTSpike/r/seduction31/12/15 12:55 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

While your problems may be very real this negativity you're feeling is infectious and just facilitates a cycle where people don't want to be around you. I can tell you firsthand I don't give a fuck if somebody is a little awkward/out of shape/doesn't dress well, but if they're negative and push that energy on me I get the fuck away immediately. If you're working on improving, then you have to let yourself off the hook emotionally. You're on a path to something better and that's the best you can …
/r/seduction28/11/17 02:49 AM
1

Dude you're 20. You still have your entire life ahead of you. I'm 25 right now, and started taking action in accordance to this sub when I was your age. You need to accept that bitching about anything doesn't mean shit if you don't take action. Literally fuck your feelings of entitlement. If you aren't DOING anything, you don't deserve anything. These things build up over time. Figure out how to get to the gym. Figure out how to start building relationships. Hang out with people. Stop being so f…
/r/seduction23/11/17 08:30 PM
1

when I say wait out the negative storm of emotions, I'm talking short term. You can't wait out being out of shape and ambitionless. I'm talking when you feel negative emotions after taking action and failing. Waiting those negative emotions out is critical because it clouds your mind of the REAL progress you're making. Set up a plan and take small steps. Non-zero days. Go to the gym 3 times in one week, just for twenty minutes. Write down in a journal everything you did right. Ask somebody for d…
/r/seduction07/11/17 04:51 PM
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You don't do anything intentionally, it will come out in the way you communicate. We picked up on your lack of self-love by the way you talk about yourself. Self-love is displayed by not talking poorly of yourself, giving yourself a chance, not assuming failure. To be fair though, you seem to have humility and some level of self-awareness, which is incredibly valuable. I don't know you, but the way you describe your situation implies to me that you have the ability to grow into something more. Y…
/r/seduction07/11/17 03:38 AM
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According to Bloomberg, 8 out of 10 business fail. You try to sell a product and customers just don't want to pay. You try to convince them and they just don't want to listen. Does this mean starting a business is terrible? I've had a lot of success in online dating and know many people that have as well. There are failures and successes in every area. Your complaints are very real and I experience them just as much, but your own personal failures do not discredit the entire process. Nowhere in …
/r/seduction28/10/17 09:04 PM
2

Because this sub is starved if validation, and honestly a lot of what drives many of us is the need for female AND male validation. Most of the shit you hear about on here is completely exaggerated. Just speaking truthfully from my experience and considering the other PUA guys Ive met.
/r/seduction27/10/17 07:33 AM
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Dude seriously? You take one example and extrapolate it across the majority of women? Most women you approach in person aren't going to fuck you. Does that mean approaching in person is terrible?
/r/seduction26/10/17 04:17 AM
1

I would expect this to be the case in most inner circles. Most people are newbies, some are incredibly weird, other guys are normal cool dudes trying to learn how to socialize better. While I tend to avoid most inner circle people, I can't say I haven't met some great friends and wings there as well.
/r/seduction25/10/17 12:39 AM
2

It's a difficult process in the beginning but having a system of habits and a wing to keep you accountable and go through this with you helps. Shifting your mindset also makes this a lot easier. There's really no such thing as rejection, often just incompatibility and bad timing, or a bad approach angle. When you can get out of your own head and stop taking everything so fucking personal, approaches stop being so painful.
/r/seduction13/10/17 02:24 PM
1

I don't think the problem is that you're not having these crushes/one-itis, it seems like you're detaching from your emotions to avoid pain. Like, I don't want the emotional pain of the ordeal back, but I do miss some of the emotions, I miss feeling emotional attachment, I miss those butterflies in my stomach, all the ways she made me happy and scared and sad, I miss, more than anything, giving a shit. Now I put absolutely zero effort into women, like, I don't really give much of a shit about an…
/r/seduction29/09/17 05:18 PM
1

It doesn't matter, shouldn't change your approach. I tend to assume most girls are until exclusivity is explicitly agreed upon.
/r/seduction26/09/17 06:41 PM
1

Do you approach? How many new leads are you bringing into your life on a weekly basis? You mention developing in EVERY area besides the one area that matters; approaching women with a dating intent. If you aren't putting in the work in this specific area your dating life will never improve. A lot of guys fall into this category. You can't score if you never take shots.
/r/seduction25/09/17 10:45 PM
9

I've always considered myself introverted and HATED going out at night. I was always a daygame guy, and favored smaller lower energy places when I went out. It was only until I committed to going out a lot at night and approaching more casually to "warm up" and ease my energy level up to match the environment that I started to thrive in these environments. You don't need to be like your cousin but try to recognize whether you're using "I'm not high energy" as a barrier to opening up, having fun,…
/r/seduction23/09/17 08:51 PM
5

You're looking at this the wrong way. How many girls do you walk past that you aren't interested in? I would imagine a lot. How many people do you meet that you aren't that interested in hanging out with? I would imagine a lot. The same applies to other people. We don't get along with most people that we meet. That's okay. LIFE is a numbers game. You're meeting other HUMAN BEINGS who have their own preferences and their own life situations. You ask if getting laid is a huge numbers game where it…
/r/seduction23/09/17 08:40 PM
2

Not at all. Hanging out with other dudes who get laid is one of the best things you can do for yourself as you'll naturally start to adopt their behaviors, and you may get lucky and meet some dudes who can actually break down what you're doing wrong and give you some critical feedback.
/r/seduction23/09/17 08:31 PM
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You can get a solid 2-3 inches with height increasing insoles on Amazon for $15, especially with boots. The people immediately rejecting this idea are being unnecessarily harsh. Girls wear high heels and makeup, why is it all of a sudden insecure when a guy can do the exact same thing? Why go to the gym then? Won't people think you're insecure about being fat? Why wear fashionable clothes if you're average looking, won't people think you're insecure? It's a terrible argument. Rejecting an easy t…
/r/seduction20/09/17 07:48 PM
1

Logistics are incredibly underrated. If you're doing approaches you're inevitably going to get interest and catch waves of high buying temperature. The ability to immediately act on it and get investment on the girls part is invaluable. Logistics remove the barriers and allow you to close immediately rather than force you to play a long game.
/r/seduction20/09/17 05:12 PM
4

By approach calibration I mean understanding how to approach girls in different situations. If she's with friends how are you going to match their energy level? If she's walking how are you going to factor her goal (walking with her friends) into your attempt to stop them and gain investment? If she's with friends how do engage them? Do you even engage them? Things like this. You can't just spam approach and hope it works. You need to make it relatable. By closing I just mean going for the numbe…
/r/seduction19/09/17 10:29 PM
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Unfortunately this issue just comes from a disconnect between your reality and the real world. It's like someone saying they need an approach to go to the gym to lift weights and after they get inside they're good... You can just walk in. You don't need a common connection. That being said it's pretty simple to provide some basic context like "hey saw you sitting here alone thought I'd say hi, I'm waiting here for a friend." The context doesn't matter after the conversation starts.
/r/seduction19/09/17 08:36 PM
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Have you considered where your blind spots are? I have many friends in this who constantly spin their wheels and put in so much effort when they're logistics are still awful, they don't close, they don't fix their approaching calibration, they don't physically escalate, etc. I would say most people who get into this fall into this category. I recognize this a lot in myself where problems I've dealt with for months or years are resolved almost overnight when I finally target these areas. I would …
/r/seduction19/09/17 08:30 PM
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For example you need to play basketball everyday to get better, but if you're shooting and dribbling in weird unconventional ways you're not going to get any better. Proper man-to-woman means you're conveying the right sexual vibe and moving the interaction forward. Are you getting numbers? Touching girls? Showing your interest?
/r/seduction19/09/17 04:10 PM
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You're doing a good job and don't be too hard on yourself, but do realize your actions and goals do need align. While these foundational lifestyle things all help (lifting improves your confidence and appearance, socializing improves your relationships and confidence, etc), some things are very specific, like having a dating life. If you want a better dating life, you need to talk to more girls. Too many guys on here do EVERYTHING but the one thing that will get them results. Don't lie to yourse…
/r/seduction19/09/17 01:56 AM
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Girls aren't a trophy or an achievement. Girls aren't something you WIN. If a girl picks someone else over you, you aren't LOSING. Relationships come from mutual compatibility and timing. A girl choosing someone else over you doesn't mean they're better than you. Change your paradigm. It's just flat out wrong.
/r/seduction13/09/17 10:21 PM
3

I think there are other things in your life you need to resolve, "getting girls" probably isn't going to make you feel better. You feel like this always happens because the same core problem is always there.
/r/seduction12/09/17 04:48 PM
3

Haha... This is fucking great. Have an upvote.
/r/seduction11/09/17 12:22 AM
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If she ever gives strong interest like that, touch her immediately. Take her hand. Pull her close. It'll change your state (turn you on), turn her on, shows a lot of confidence, and escalates the interaction and moves it forward. It's also relatively easy to do no matter where your energy levels are at.
/r/seduction08/09/17 05:12 PM
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What the fuck. No. That sounds rapey cause you literally just described rape. Girls that give LMR don't want you to "take the pussy," these girls don't want to feel like a slut. If a girl even feels like she has to say these things, then just acknowledge it, make her feel comfortable, and continue moving thing forward. You and her both want the same thing so just be a little patient.
/r/seduction05/09/17 08:35 AM
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If this happened once don't worry about it. People are blowing this way out of proportion. My friend asked me to go out once. When it was time to head out I changed my mind. Am I crazy? You're allowed to change your mind. If she pulls this repeatedly than I would be concerned.
/r/seduction31/08/17 03:51 PM
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If a girl is telling you she's not looking for anything serious, it means she thinks you were too invested and needed to call it out. Girls don't say this type of stuff to "alpha" type dudes (hate to use the term but it makes sense here). Your compliment did not help your case at all, but it was already over by that point. You have to understand that you can SAY you're just seeing where things are taking you, but your actions and demeanor are likely conveying over-investment and wanting somethin…
/r/seduction30/08/17 11:22 PM
1

You just said you reroute your life to avoid girls. Reroute your life to seek out girls. Go to bars, social gatherings, seek out new interactions. How do you not know what to do? You spelled out exactly what you're doing. Do the opposite. You know what to do. Just start doing it.
/r/seduction30/08/17 11:12 PM
1

Good luck. Going out doesn't have to involve spending lots money. I spent maybe $10 a weekend going out to meet people, buying 1-2 cheap beers a night at the bar/club.
/r/seduction30/08/17 03:54 PM
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Have you slept with any of these girls? I don't have any context but I'm going to guess that you're failing to sleep with these girls and thus failing to get enough investment from these girls to continue being interested in seeing you. Correct me if I'm wrong, as it's a large assumption I'm making.
/r/seduction30/08/17 05:51 AM
1

Have you slept with any of these girls? I don't have any context but I'm going to guess that you're failing to sleep with these girls and thus failing to get enough investment from these girls to continue being interested in seeing you. Correct me if I'm wrong, as it's a large assumption I'm making.
/r/seduction30/08/17 05:51 AM
2

Your post is very indicative of why you're getting no results. Unfortunately it's a cycle, and it's difficult as hell to get out of it. The hungry don't get fed. The more you allow yourself to feel bad, the worse it's going to get. People are repulsed by negativity. You say getting laid "isn't happening to you." Getting laid isn't something that "happens to you," it's an experience you share with somebody. Nobody is going to give you love and affection, it's something you offer somebody as a gif…
/r/seduction29/08/17 04:16 PM
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Don't do this. How do you get "dumped" by a girl you were never in a relationship with? She's telling you you either aren't doing it for her, she's more invested in someone else, or you're needy as fuck and she feels the need to get the fuck out immediately. Considering you said the sex was pretty good (if it was true), it's probably one of the latter two, both of which cases are situations where you DO NOT want to polarize when she's not invested enough. Be casual and non-needy and invite her o…
/r/seduction29/08/17 04:56 AM
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Haha what an interesting case. What do you think it is that pushes girls away? How are you able to escalate to sex and keep interest but then lose it after? It could be over aggression leading them to labeling you as just a fuck, maybe you're really unskilled and they don't care for repeats, or you have some weird quirk you're unaware of. Hard to diagnose.
/r/seduction29/08/17 04:30 AM
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If seduction is actually one of your goals, how is it not on your calendar? If you're truly going full force you should at least be going out Friday/Saturday nights. These weekends nights coupled with some online dating should be enough to keep your social life better than 90%+ of people.
/r/seduction28/08/17 04:50 PM
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Why do you frame it as if you need to "turn off" treating other people like fellow human beings? Being a good person and being attractive are not mutually exclusive.
/r/seduction28/08/17 04:43 PM
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Get a life. Seriously. This girl is taking up so much space in your mind cause you have NOTHING else of equivalent importance. Get better friends, do more exciting things, meet more girls.
/r/seduction26/08/17 02:52 AM
1

The distinction between not having the right energy and being anxious is very important. It's very easy to claim apathy when it's social anxiety that's stopping you. Be clear in your intentions and try to shift your energy as much as is appropriate.
/r/seduction25/08/17 08:50 PM
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Any girl you approach is going to be a long shot 1/20-1/50 or worse odds she's into you and you take it somewhere. Treat each interaction as such. Something fun to do, and expecting nothing. You having feelings this strong and early means you're way too invested in a positive outcome and you're too afraid to bomb. There's no advice here besides talking to her, showing your interest, and taking the L if she's not reciprocating.
/r/seduction24/08/17 11:19 PM
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Exactly this. A girl in a group who's on her phone not talking to her friends is a clear sign she's bored and not engaged in the environment. It's about as good of an opening you can hope for.
/r/seduction24/08/17 11:14 PM
4

How will doing nothing bring you emotionally closer? Emotional closeness is largely related to investment. Sex is a huge investment in somebody else. You can talk to somebody all night, but if somebody else talks to her for five minutes and she sleeps with him she's going to feel more invested and closer to the other dude.
/r/seduction24/08/17 04:11 PM
3

if you can't close you probably don't have "the hard part" (attraction) down. You're probably playing it safe, getting people to have a generally positive attitude towards you, and you're scared of "ruining" it by polarizing the interaction with an escalation. If you TRULY have attraction down, or believe you do, then decide on escalations (hold hand, arm around waist, arm on leg, etc) to do prior to interactions and when you find yourself in a situation where someone seems interested, just do i…
/r/seduction24/08/17 04:10 PM
2

Chris from Good Looking Loser touches on this. He was pretty into bodybuilding in his 20s while doing the PUA thing and said he got the most attention when he was 190 at 6'2 8% body fat. This is coming from a guy who was upwards of 240 lbs.
/r/seduction24/08/17 04:43 AM
1

Going to be honest man, if you actually feel like you need this much help with an interaction, you're likely already fucked. Girls that are into you won't give you that much trouble. You already know what your options are. Invite her out again, don't saturate her inbox, and hope she meets up.
/r/seduction23/08/17 02:07 AM
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Most girls will never meet with you from Tinder because you're one of 500 guys they've matched with. Don't take it personally. It's mostly luck even with good game. Any attractive girl will get a match on >95% of their swipes. Meeting up with them is just a numbers game and hoping she's available and has her attention on you at the same time. Be direct, push for the meet up, and try not to waste too much time. Also location matters. I had decent success in college, consistent success (1-2 hookup…
/r/seduction22/08/17 07:54 PM
1

What are you actually doing to move forward? Are your expectations actually in line with what you're doing? Be realistic. If you were doing 100 approaches a month and still not getting anything, I would understand your concern, but if you're approaching once a week or never, you need a reality check. I joined seddit my sophomore year, did 2-300 approaches, made a lot of progress. Took the summer off and relapsed into even more anxiety. Made it through college without much success besides a relat…
/r/seduction22/08/17 05:35 PM
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Like I said you can work on verbally expressing your interest first. Tell her explicitly you find her attractive, ask for her number so you can meet up for drinks or coffee. You don't have to for EVERY girl, but since asking in general is a weak point for you it's not a bad idea to simply make that a rule for now until you get used to it.
/r/seduction21/08/17 07:25 PM
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There is, but that's really just dependent on how a girl feels about you. If a girl is into you it doesn't really matter whereas if she's only somewhat interested, you have to be more mindful of not offering too much. Again, it comes back to the fact that girls will give more room for error to a guy if she likes him. It just seems like you two had bad timing there. Don't sweat it, wait a few days and ask her out again. If she shoots it down without offering a reschedule, you can probably safely …
/r/seduction21/08/17 07:23 PM
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Physical touch that overtly expresses your interest. Touching /caressing because you want to touch her, not these light touches on the arm that don't mean anything. Things like holding her hand, caressing her arm, etc. A lot of approaches go nowhere as guys follow up the open with an entirely platonic conversation. Even if they get the number it goes nowhere as the girls don't see them in a sexual light. You can work on expressing your interest verbally to screen out girls who aren't interested,…
/r/seduction21/08/17 06:10 PM
1

They matter just a little less than looks matter to you.
/r/seduction21/08/17 05:34 PM
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I need your help, seduction community. How can I convey my true intentions without coming over like a creep? I'm going to suggest you let go of this desire to not look like a creep, it's holding you back from expressing your interest. At the very least, always ask for a phone number when you exit interactions. In my opinion it's ideal to establish some kind of overt physical dialogue before leaving any interaction to properly screen that a girl is really interested, as girls don't comfortably al…
/r/seduction21/08/17 04:25 PM
1

Exactly this. I was in a similar situation as you OP, and small chunking the process into smaller pieces that I COULD do, like ask for directions, was how I got past that initial resistance.
/r/seduction21/08/17 04:00 PM
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Needy just depends on the place it comes from. If you fixate on that "rejection" and are constantly thinking about it rather than the rest of your nights plans, you're probably being needy. Otherwise, there was nothing wrong with what you did. You have to assume it was genuine and offer again at some other point and see what the deal is. Fact is, some girl that totally blows one guy off will be the most on point, attentive, sweet girl for another. Aim to be that second guy, and I don't mean with…
/r/seduction21/08/17 05:53 AM
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Don't think about other guys. Any attractive girl is going to be having other guys hitting her up, and it doesn't change your course of action either way. Be non-needy, offer her only positive emotions, live your own life. Be centered in your life/mission and in your worth. The only way she'll chase is if she feels the best around you and you give her the space to feel your absence. Don't try and fake it, just live your life and offer her invitations to join in when it makes sense for you.
/r/seduction20/08/17 09:04 PM
1

I'm not too familiar with NYC but logistics are everything. Pay more/get roommates/downsize to live as close as possible to the venues you will be frequenting.
/r/seduction16/08/17 07:08 PM
9

It can be this easy, but it's not always. You were with friends, you were having fun, and you had a girl express her interest and escalate on you. Recreating this situation without anything above can be difficult, especially when you're facing rejections, difficult logistical problems, other guys, distracting friends, crashing state, etc. That being said good job! It sounds like you already have a great foundation to work with.
/r/seduction14/08/17 11:47 PM
1

Haha I'm 24 I'm sure we're not far apart in age ;) I used to polarize hard very quickly like you suggested and lost a lot even though it did flip the occasional girl, I'm currently working on playing the long game with social media with these wishy-washy girls I would ordinarily just delete out of my phone to keep them in my network for later. There is merit to both approaches and if you're happy with the results by all means continue.
/r/seduction14/08/17 04:44 PM
8

I like how you mock mini golf... Then suggest one of those trampoline places. ;)
/r/seduction14/08/17 02:16 AM
–

Why?
/r/seduction14/08/17 02:14 AM
3

You're overthinking it. I'm 24, almost 25, graduated and working, still hooking up with college girls 19-21. You're still in college, you're still in their world. You have to realize guys 18-21 really don't have shit to offer. They're immature and inexperienced. Being older is an advantage, youth is just a mindset.
/r/seduction14/08/17 12:01 AM
7

10 interactions is nothing.Expect to talk to 20-30 girls before getting anything substantial (sex, dating, etc. Fun interactions, #s, dates that don't go anywhere will be sprinkled in between ) even when you get good at this. Think of this like weight lifting. Ten reps on a bench press isn't going to do shit. 3 sets of five reps over the course of 6 months, increasing your weights every session? That will build strength. This stuff is weird in that a lot of it depends on shifting your paradigms …
/r/seduction13/08/17 11:46 PM
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I don't agree with this. It sounds good in theory, but really it just looks needy as fuck. People who value their time don't go around needlessly telling strangers they value their time, they simply cut shit off. A girl I was only slightly into did the "I value my time" schpeal a few weeks and I lost almost attraction. It feels gross and manipulative. Ultimately you sending a message like this is reaction-seeking as you're hoping she replies and tries to win you back.
/r/seduction13/08/17 06:38 PM
1

You're gonna have to get used to not getting replies and flaking when you play this game.
/r/seduction13/08/17 05:49 PM
1

Very location dependent. When I lived downtown next to a college campus I'd hook up with maybe two really cute college girls a month off strictly Tinder. Now that I'm 20 mins from downtown in a new state, I've closed maybe twice in the last 8 months. That being said I have a very particular type. For the guys saying Tinder is total shit, step up your Tinder game (pics, bio, message structure) or move out of the fucking suburbs so you match with girls <5 miles away.
/r/seduction12/08/17 08:48 PM
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It takes awhile dude. I was in a similar boat entering college, was always in advanced classes, majored in engineering. I can relate. You just need to be hyper aware when you get into these situations with girls where you typically "miss out" and force yourself to make some kind of escalation when you're unsure. A good number of these are going to work and you're going to get a sense of when it is appropriate to escalate, and as you gain experience with girls your mindset will naturally grow as …
/r/seduction11/08/17 01:23 AM
1

Learn to push these interactions forward. You should feel relief and excitement rather than nervousness. She's into you, what's to be nervous about? These are the interactions you're looking for. You can't play this game if she's not into you. For now though, try to remember if you fail you're simply the same as you were before. You have nothing to lose. Being on a date means nothing. Hanging out means nothing. There is no failing at this point, only upside. Escalating isn't a chance for failure…
/r/seduction10/08/17 10:17 PM
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For this issue you really just need to call out and remember you get anxious in these moments and force yourself to make some kind of escalation. As you gain reference experiences you'll start to get a sense of if it will work or not, but in the beginning you just need to push past that feeling. You can try setting a goal to perform some small escalation, then next time do the same but add one more thing, baby stepping into it. Something I do a lot now is focus on escalating logistics, which giv…
/r/seduction09/08/17 11:41 PM
1

It's having a high opinion of yourself regardless of circumstance. A lot of guys here want to get girls because they feel like they're not enough as they are. They pander to women who behave terribly because they don't have the strength to walk away. They play it safe in interactions because they think they don't offer enough value to get away with breaking rapport. There isn't some nirvana that you hit where you just love yourself, but when you stop talking shit about everything you do and you …
/r/seduction09/08/17 07:38 PM
1

The advice is still going to be "just approach." Even the weakest person is going to get stronger by "just lifting weights." Stop identifying with being a "pariah," you're just lacking in some characteristic and don't have awareness of it (fashion/body language/tonality/eye contact/etc). That being said, if you are not lying and they literally won't look at you... Have you put in any thought as to why? What are you wearing? What do you sound like? Are you twitching awkwardly and can't make eye c…
/r/seduction07/08/17 11:34 PM
1

Rather than having to constantly make correct decisions every day just create a system that takes care of it for you. For example... Go out every Friday/Saturday night. Field report and write about your best three sets, what you did well and what you could work on. Based on field reports choose one thing to work on each night. When you have a wing give him $25 and you get $5 back each approach. Every time you're in set for longer than 5 minutes ask for the number no matter what. Text every numbe…
/r/seduction07/08/17 11:06 PM
8

Being lively and energetic at your job does not in any way mean you're good at eliciting the correct responses or conveying an appropriate vibe in a cold approach situation. I can relate, and these are my observations. You'll miss a lot of good interactions if you assume it's the girl being boring and not yourself. As you say in your post, "I have never been concerned whether I'm going to come across as boring or uninteresting." That's good to a certain degree, but not in all cases. I have frien…
/r/seduction07/08/17 05:59 PM
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Find a wing. Create systems to keep you accountable. Go after the girls you really want to. All the other stuff is good to do for you, but nothing is really going to make you better other than approaching. Acclimate yourself to it.
/r/seduction07/08/17 04:16 PM
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Part of this is on her, but part of this is on you as well. Assuming you approached her, it's her not responsibility to entertain you. She might not be boring, you might just be unskilled at having interesting conversations and drawing out an entertaining interaction.
/r/seduction07/08/17 04:14 PM
8

Act the same. Distinctions come in the weeks and months that follow. I don't want to rush messing things up with a girl who seems like relationship material That's exactly why you act the same. So you don't mess it up by putting her on a pedestal and not giving her the experience she wants.
/r/seduction04/08/17 02:57 AM
2

Good luck! I can definitely relate to that last part as well. I think it comes from holding onto the earlier models of dating we used when we were in high school. Hard to break those habits and realize there are other ways to communicate that are more honest but still get you both what you want.
/r/seduction03/08/17 06:00 PM
1

Interesting. Well I'm glad you're into it too. I've read about a lot of scenarios when the guy is forced into it and obviously has a much harder time with it than his girl for obvious reasons. Good luck. Whether you choose to disclose it is your choice ethically. I honestly don't think it matters. If you're communicating a casual thing and don't talk or act as if you would ever get into a relationship there's practically no difference. In the early stages it's assumed things are casual for most …
/r/seduction03/08/17 04:10 PM
1

Just curious you say it went from closed to open. How did that come about? My advice to you is take "open relationship" out of your bio. It doesn't help. Just manage expectations when you meet the girls and communicate you only want something casual (don't need to explicitly say this). You can be open about it, but so long as you're communicating your intent in other ways you don't need to volunteer it (imo). Like others have said exchange a few messages, and go for the number quickly. If a girl…
/r/seduction03/08/17 02:53 PM
1

The game is decided in logistics. Focus on fixing your logistics. There's nothing you can do besides have girls come to you and you've already found that's difficult. It can happen occasionally so don't stop tindering, if anything lower your search radius. It'll lower your matches but it's pretty damn difficult and rare to convince a girl to drive out 30+ minutes to see you. Living downtown by a university I used to get a consistent 1-3 matches that would lead to sex per month. Living 20 minutes…
/r/seduction03/08/17 02:45 PM
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Bring your most competent wing and try to pair off with the girls and isolate at some point if the opportunity presents itself, or at least get both of you back to your place or hers. It's pretty shit with the friend being there the entire time, but I can't say it doesn't happen if you and your buddy have decent game.
/r/seduction03/08/17 02:38 PM
3

First of all you don't have a Reddit name called depressedloserxd. You don't say things like you'll probably seem like you're being fake, and you feel like there's no chance. Easier said than done, but nobody is going to let you on the the frame of a conversation if you're coming into the interaction reeking of negativity. Handle your shit, or at least learn how to project positivity and keep others away from the negativity you feel. There is no simple answer to this but fixing your mindset is p…
/r/seduction03/08/17 05:46 AM
12

I agree. A lot of what we do also really rubs into these pains we have, and I think properly processing the aftermath is what really drives the change we seek.
/r/seduction02/08/17 08:06 PM
1

Be more vigilant when you're going into situations that you know this could happen. Think about this before you go somewhere and be ready to be open so you don't have to react spontaneously to it in the moment. That's really all you can do. Practice holding yourself in a different state.
/r/seduction02/08/17 07:01 PM
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Good job! You took action. Bottom line you should be proud of yourself. Unfortunately you're going to have to get used to it. You're going to meet a lot of girls who seem so excited to meet you and you have a great time with, then NEVER see you again for reasons you'll never get to know. These sting. You're also going to meet a ton of girls who seem only slight interested, yet give you their number, come out to meet you and you hit it off. Life is random. Be okay with it.
/r/seduction02/08/17 05:49 PM
1

Don't take it personally. I'm sure you've flaked on people constantly throughout your life. She doesn't owe you anything. If anything, assume absolutely nothing when you text girls. The default is indifference, or simply just a lack of investment to go out of her way to see you. Reward the girls who respond differently.
/r/seduction01/08/17 10:39 PM
1

I'm 24. Started practicing these concepts at 20. I would guess the average age here is pretty young. Most don't have much experience.
/r/seduction01/08/17 08:09 PM
1

Seems like validation. I can't answer that for you though. You're talking about a a bad vibe, negative mindset, and NEEDING a girl. You don't NEED a girl (nobody needs a girl), which is why I'm leaning towards the idea that you think getting a girl is going to solve some other issue you're dealing with, whether it be loneliness, low self-esteem, etc.
/r/seduction01/08/17 12:01 AM
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Think about it. Desperation due to a need for sex (testosterone) versus a need for validation are two very different things.
/r/seduction31/07/17 09:27 PM
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Why are you so desperate for a girl? What's driving you?
/r/seduction31/07/17 05:28 PM
2

Try to shift your focus away from trying to "accomplish" or "achieve" kino/physicality. It's not a barrier to overcome, but it's a desire you naturally have that you can open up and get more in touch with. When I'm out with a girl I don't think about what I need to do to get to a kiss or get physical, I lead the two of us through a process where I feel in my body that I want to touch her and I do it because I want to and I enjoy it. In the beginning just make it a goal every interaction to do so…
/r/seduction31/07/17 05:19 PM
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You're overthinking this. There's nothing wrong with "Let's go upstairs," especially when she's already communicating her interest by touching you and giving your eye contact. This need for something punny or a "good go to" is just you wanting to break the sexual tension. Don't.
/r/seduction31/07/17 04:07 PM
7

Don't worry about it. You're projecting into the future. This will probably lead to nothing, if she brings it up just say you were in the neighborhood and thought about saying hi, but left cause you figured she was gone.
/r/seduction29/07/17 01:57 AM
1

Seriously this. It amazes me how guys ask for advice or are confused why they have no results when they don't even know and have never taken the time to make out the basic steps that need to happen. Also, approach more. You say once per month? You're not even in the game. You don't need help, you need to get in front of more girls.
/r/seduction29/07/17 12:59 AM
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If she keeps doing this she's likely not interested in you. Why do you think otherwise?
/r/seduction27/07/17 07:29 PM
1

Have a plan. Get drinks near your place. Invite her back to your place. Touch her. Basic game plan. You need a way to get from intro to your bed.
/r/seduction27/07/17 03:06 AM
1

You already said it yourself your place is out of the question. This immediately makes things more difficult as you have to deal with her logistics. There are so many reasons why she wouldn't want you in her place, not to mention you're in her world, rather than your own. Really the only option here is to go to her place. So invite her on a date then suggest to go to her place. Or simply tell her to invite you over. If she's busy you ask her when she's free. If she doesn't tell you, then just mo…
/r/seduction26/07/17 11:49 PM
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You say you can kiss them no problem. Cool. Simply work on escalating logistics. Getting somewhere you are private. You say your logistics suck. Fix them. Logistics are one of the biggest factors in escalating. That's all.
/r/seduction26/07/17 10:27 PM
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She already rejected you and has a boyfriend. Move on. Don't worry about keeping tabs on somebody and if they randomly become single, continue living your life and find other girls who are single and interested. There are no other next steps here. You took a shot and good on you, but keep things moving.
/r/seduction24/07/17 07:31 PM
1

It really just depends on what you mean by status. Things like money don't mean much outside of providing you with better logistics. Things like social status are always going to generate better responses. If everybody in a venue or social group knows you and seems to like you, it shortcuts attraction and comfort as you're already pre-approved by other people, practically like a well reviewed restaurant on Yelp is going to be assumed to be of high quality.
/r/seduction24/07/17 12:15 AM
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Drinks at a bar across the street from my apartment. If we're vibing well I invite them to check out my apartment. I used to have these elaborate 1st, 2nd, and 3rd date plans but it's really not necessary. If it's on it's on. It's low investment and if I don't like the girl I can leave. Save the elaborate dates for girls who've earned it.
/r/seduction23/07/17 09:00 PM
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I agree with you on it coming out sooner or later, but there are also cases where you get invested too quickly but the girl still likes you and it can work. In these cases if you play it right you'll get to see her again and let her invest in you more as well as calm down those irrational feelings of infatuation. This is OP. If you're waiting on girls that are always 100% into you like you're into them you're going to unnecessarily lose a ton of great girls. The I love you example was just to il…
/r/seduction22/07/17 12:54 AM
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Understanding the subtleties of your communication is not dishonest, it comes with being a good communicator. The girl rejected him so we're just doing a post-mortem. I personally don't think his text was that bad. I think it's honest. Breaking it down from HER perspective though I can see how OP meant to communicate "hey I want to see you and have fun," but incidentally included things in his text that made her possibly misinterpret his intentions and investment and reject him. I get where you'…
/r/seduction21/07/17 09:20 PM
10

I'm not criticizing, these are just my observations. Personally I don't think your text was that bad. I'm offering my perspective as she rejected you so IF I were to assume your text had something to do with it these would be the reasons. There are many ways to say the same thing. Imagine if somebody you barely knew asked you to get lunch in two different ways. "Hey man, I'm not sure if it would be too much to ask, but do you want to get lunch maybe? To be honest I really want to get lunch but i…
/r/seduction21/07/17 09:09 PM
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Your text was a bit unsure and needy (I'm wondering if it would be too much, I really got you stuck on my mind to be honest). You could've been more to the point with "Hey I'm thinking about visiting, you free this weekend?" No matter how a girl feels about you she's going to pull back with a text like yours that puts so much expectation on her, even if she does want to see you again and see where things go. Immediately she has to decide if she's in as deep as you, and oftentimes they're simply …
/r/seduction21/07/17 03:52 PM
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What? Works a lot? What does that even mean? You express your interest and if she reciprocates you escalate and move things to the next step. Ask her out. That is all.
/r/seduction21/07/17 03:46 PM
1

So meet and approach more. At its core this is a numbers game. It's not uncommon to get in hundreds of approaches before seeing significant change. You'll eventually go on streaks where you meet several available girls in the same month. Week. Day. Progress happens fast if you just put the numbers in. That's just months of practice. You're on /r/seduction. There are always opportunities to meet people. Even past the first 2-3 weeks of school. This is why we do this. To learn how to meet people a…
/r/seduction21/07/17 05:10 AM
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Just take a breath and relax. You found this stuff, and so long as you take action on it you'll be fine. You say you don't get it, but then say you don't think you're bad looking. You're right, you don't get it. This is about how much action you take. How much action are you taking? How many people are you meeting per week? What aspect of social skill are you tweaking and improving on? What aspect of your image and appearance are you improving? I promise you most people who are single are NOT ge…
/r/seduction20/07/17 04:41 PM
6

I'd like to add on to this, it's not bad or good. It just is. Don't even place a value judgment on it. We're all trying to get the best for ourselves. It's human.
/r/seduction20/07/17 05:07 AM
1

Don't talk to her dude. You can't have a relationship with her until you don't need her. Which means you're probably never going to have a relationship with her. It sucks. I don't talk to a lot of girls from my past where I had destructive tendencies. You haven't changed. You're still the same person, and being together is going to be destructive.
/r/seduction19/07/17 10:46 PM
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If you can't even stop and acknowledge countless people telling you to stop you're not going to get any advice that's going to help with what you do want. The only real advice that's going to help you is to calm down, get over this girl, and approach this relationship and yourself in a healthy way. Good luck, and I really hope you don't harm yourself or anyone around you.
/r/seduction19/07/17 07:53 PM
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Dude, this is insane. Just skimming I can pull out all these red flags. ONE of these is grounds to think about ending this. You have ALL OF THEM. She's 19 You're 21 4 Hour distance (Lond Distance Relationship) You're engaging in self harm IN FRONT OF HER and because of this relationship She literally said you shouldn't be together She pepper sprayed you She blocked you on everything She tells you again not to see her Dude this is fucking ridiculous. Think about this rationally. There is no logic…
/r/seduction19/07/17 07:36 PM
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I really don't think casual vs relationships is the way to think about it, but instead finding somebody you connect with versus having sex with whoever is receptive. What you choose to do after you find someone you connect with is up to you. Also being a virgin I don't think you have any experience to determine what you are and aren't. Saying you're a relationship guy to justify not taking action and gaining reference experiences is bullshit. You can't be a "relationship guy" if you can't even c…
/r/seduction19/07/17 05:59 PM
1

If you're in software I would consider Seattle as well. Huge tech hub, I went to school there. University of Washington is 30% Asian. The city itself isn't great in terms of nightlife though. Definitely a step up from where you're at but I don't plan on moving back there til my 30s. Very expensive too, though not as absurdly expensive as California. You'll still have to deal with the absurd traffic of LA in Seattle, just on a smaller scale. Take a trip out to Austin Texas. For real. They have in…
/r/seduction19/07/17 04:31 PM
3

You have no idea if a girl is interested in you before you approach, only clues like repeated eye contact. Even girls who do give you eye contact are not a guaranteed positive reaction. You have to just go in and see what the girl is like.
/r/seduction19/07/17 04:27 PM
1

You have to learn to have consistency in your behavior. You aren't going to get better results by "trying more." Also expect nothing. This isn't to say have negative beliefs about how girls will react to you, but don't have any positive or negative expectations. If the girl doesn't want to see you again, you've lost nothing. You're back to where you were at before, and you were fine before.
/r/seduction19/07/17 04:26 PM
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You should move to a larger city, and live IN the city. It's not going to make anything easier on an individual basis, but it will technically improve your odds as you can play the numbers more often as you will have more opportunity.
/r/seduction19/07/17 03:39 PM
2

You already know what you need to do. Move to an area with as best a nightlife and as close to as many people you age as possible. Get a roommate on Craigslist. Be somebody else's roommate. Daygame. Join activities. Force yourself to go out at night alone and meet people. Use tinder and bumble or whatever else you want. Build momentum and use your social network to continue growing your reach.
/r/seduction19/07/17 05:50 AM
1

What's the point? Are you trying to prove to me that you can't get results not matter what, or yourself? My advice still stands. Take it or leave it, it's your life.
/r/seduction18/07/17 05:02 AM
1

This just comes down to areas of improvement again. Unless you're horribly disfigured in some freak accident or genetic disfigurement Most guys can look "attractive." We're not women. We're not defined entirely by our looks. Through fashion, grooming, fitness, and well taken pictures most guys can look attractive for a women to be open to talking to them. Most tinder profiles look like shit so it's really not that hard to stand out if you actually take the effort to put everything together. You …
/r/seduction14/07/17 09:29 PM
8

You ever consider the possibility you have areas of improvement in your tinder game? I've had a lot of success with Tinder over the years, and I've gone through good and bad streaks. Nowhere in your post do you talk about what areas you could improve in, or what you've been doing to improve. This post is all complaining and taking in value, rather than offering value. It mirrors your tinder results. You say girls are deciding you aren't good enough. Are you good enough? What differentiates you? …
/r/seduction13/07/17 04:57 PM
1

Don't assume what a girl wants. In most cases girls are going to be just as averse as you are towards getting into a quick relationship. If you keep at this you'll eventually end up in a situation where you flip and want one when the girl doesn't.
/r/seduction12/07/17 03:32 PM
5

This is dumb. What if you lifted weights at the gym with poor form and threw the dumbbells around? What if you drove without a seatbelt and didn't follow basic guidelines? What if you went on a boat and didn't know how to swim or how to wear a life vest? If you do ANYTHING horribly wrong there will be consequences. Be smart about this, be polite, and think reasonably about how you can push your comfort zone without drawing undue attention to yourself and you'll be fine.
/r/seduction12/07/17 03:27 PM
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It depends. If you think it's going to solve all your problems, no, it's not. It's gotta come from within you. When I started pickup 4 years ago I never would have thought I would have slept with some of the girls I ended up with. Over those four years I've been in and out of pickup with relationships and just general complacency. When I see a girl at the club like some of my exes, I still have that same doubt I used to have when I started. I still feel approach anxiety. On a bad night sometimes…
/r/seduction10/07/17 03:33 AM
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You don't think girls like "pretty boys?" Not every girl like "manly" guys. We all have our own type and we won't appeal to every person. Frankly, be glad and happy you don't have a hideously ugly face. For the most part if you're "attractive enough" girls don't really care that much. From the sound of it, you fall into that category. I understand what you're saying, but this is a problem that can only be solved by doing something different. You don't feel "good" cause you've never been with tha…
/r/seduction09/07/17 09:10 PM
1

Is she receptive to hugs when you see her or leave? Is she physically comfortable with you? If you can't see yourself making an overt move like grabbing her hand or just caressing her side or whatever, invite her out for drinks or somewhere where there's no deniability why you're together. If she says yes you have to assume it will work and make that overt move. There's no getting around that leap of faith.
/r/seduction08/07/17 11:25 PM
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Go a little deeper. Why do you feel inferior? How are you not good with girls? Before asking what can you do, what do you even do today?
/r/seduction08/07/17 10:31 PM
2

I just want to give you props for reflecting on the feelings you have here, a lot of guys get stuck and never even try to look into themselves. You said you already know that women can be really sloppy and disgusting. Focusing on just these traits is dehumanizing. Would you find it humanizing if somebody who idolized you tried to focus on how disgusting you could be to try to relate to you? That you're "just like them?" Sloppy and disgusting? Again that's not the point. The point I was trying to…
/r/seduction07/07/17 05:40 PM
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Good job man. It's a huge thing to just take action when it comes to this. You should be proud of yourself for that. Make a system. Set small goals to do 1-5 approaches. When I started I would do bullshit "ask for directions" 10 times for my approaches. Go to an RSD Freetour the next time they're in LA and meet some other guys who do this. Join the RSD Inner Circle there. Having a friend who's trying to do the same thing will help keep you accountable and motivate you to keep on pushing. Most im…
/r/seduction07/07/17 03:51 PM
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There's not any trick to this, you just have to actively try to change your perception and challenge your beliefs when you feel this resistance. Once you start dating or becoming friends with different girls, talk with them about what their experience is like as a girl. As much as it seems difficult from the guys perspective, girls have equally difficult and different experiences that you would never expect. Ask girls about the worse things they've ever done. This isn't to make them seem like LE…
/r/seduction07/07/17 03:46 PM
1

... Don't do this. Just be normal and lead and ask her out for a drink or something. Cross your fingers she doesn't feel rejected after she put herself out there and you ignored it.
/r/seduction05/07/17 05:52 PM
3

Escalating in social circles can be pretty tricky, especially if you have to ask about it on Seddit haha. Some foolproof ways you can escalate is to mention your interest to the mutual contact you have with this person, asking if the person is single or not, and let it travel that way. If the other person is interested they may change their behavior and make it easier to escalate. Second, you can simply escalate by exchanging numbers with this person and asking them out for a drink or coffee at …
/r/seduction05/07/17 04:14 PM
1

Do you practice this stuff? PUA/seduction/whatever you want to call it? It's good to reflect like this man, shows you're thinking. I can relate to a lot of the feelings you have, I'm 24 and have had a lot of things I thought were really solid break apart because of logistical problems. I think going deeper and really trying to figure out your motivation and the source of these feelings could help you. Why are you depressed when you meet somebody you're interested in but it doesn't work out? Beca…
/r/seduction27/06/17 04:52 PM
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What are you trying to get out of these relationships? What do you want? How old are you? In general, I think part of this just comes with time and accumulating more experiences with women. I don't mean to say this in a cynical way, but when you start to notice and realize the transient nature of most relationships and how a lot of the time they just come and go, it becomes easier to remind yourself of this and not invest too heavily in them. Not that you can't ENJOY them, but it gets easier to …
/r/seduction26/06/17 06:13 PM
5

If you're REALLY turning people off that much go grab an audio recorder, record audio, and review it later. You have tools at your disposal to analyze and figure out exactly what it is, and if you don't leverage them you can't complain that you're staying the same. This could be any number of things. You may be doing horrific things with your tonality that freak people out. Maybe you're saying strange things and are completely out of touch. Maybe you're constantly bringing the conversation back …
/r/seduction21/06/17 10:50 PM
5

This post captures a lot of the feelings I have. I'll often write a comment halfway, then realize it's absolutely pointless, delete it, and move on. Either that, or Woujo has already posted more or less what I thought.
/r/seduction21/06/17 10:44 PM
5

I was in a very codependent relationship in college and had practically given up on socializing outside of my immediate circle of friends, and constantly saw people I met freshman year who I was too anxious to talk to again. It made me feel sick to the point that I ended that relationship and slowly started approaching. I found attending an RSD Freetour off an invitation from a guy off Seddit, and going out with him to push myself into daygame approaches really helped.
/r/seduction19/06/17 12:37 AM
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Yes, first love is a special experience, but it's not this incredible thing that you're making it out to be. This pain you're feeling is coming completely out of scarcity and has NOTHING to do with you. You even say that it hurts knowing "she won't be as excited as you." Why does it matter if she won't be as excited as you? How does that change YOUR experience at all? How do you know how she feels in the first place? Every person and every relationship I've had has been unique. If anything, my f…
/r/seduction14/06/17 04:09 PM
3

It's better to not be needy. I mean honestly think about it. If you were an axe murderer or had ebola, do you think honestly expressing that would help either? It's a bit extreme and comical but there are some things that aren't going to help you even if you're super honest/vulnerable/congruent with it. Rather than say "I'm super needy" you could say "I really want you." Being wanted feels good, but being needed? Not so much.
/r/seduction13/06/17 03:35 PM
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Adding onto this, I understand what you mean by "this is me being congruent," Mark Manson describes this behavior of being vulnerable as "emotional vomit." In this case expressing "I'm feeling needy" would TRULY be congruent, as marthdotsk is spot on about her not making you needy, as she is not directly causing anything. In the beginning you being "congruent" is going to turn off a lot of girls as you're being honest about an incredibly unattractive characteristic. It's going to shine a light o…
/r/seduction12/06/17 09:42 PM
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What are you trying to do with this girl? Talk to her? Or move the interaction forward? Physically escalate and touch her. Ask for her phone number. Move her around. You don't need to be talkative to do ANY of this.
/r/seduction09/06/17 07:10 PM
3

Dude. Go somewhere else. Create a situation where you can sit next to her. You keep making excuses, but ultimately you just need to find a way to make it happen, otherwise somebody else will.
/r/seduction09/06/17 07:06 PM
3

It's just jealousy. It's normal. Props to you for recognizing and analyzing it and it's possible causes ("its the hardest thing in the world for me to get", "so that makes me feel"), that's a mature way of approaching this and it's the first step to overcoming it. You'll need to shed these beliefs if you ever want to be on the other side, as you'll experience a huge amount of resistance and cognitive dissonance if you ever try to live this life that causes you so much anger. You only feel angry …
/r/seduction09/06/17 05:17 PM
2

I want things to happen naturally. You want things to be convenient for you. It just feels like when they want me to approach them it just feels awkward and uncomfortable. It will feel just as awkward and uncomfortable to them if they approach you. If you want your life to be a certain way, you have to take on the burden of feeling uncomfortable. If you want to stay comfortable, you're at the mercy of those who are willing to be uncomfortable. It's that simple.
/r/seduction08/06/17 04:38 PM
3

Join one. Seriously. At least seriously consider it, go through the process, and decide then. If you've already applied for housing still go through the process. I know a ton of people who left dorms partway through the year to join their fraternity. I can't really comment on hazing, that's one of the things that turned me away from it when I was 18-20. I've heard different reports on how real it is. Just depends on the house. That being said, it's truly a small price to pay for the opportunitie…
/r/seduction07/06/17 04:09 PM
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Get some good pictures from a photographer friend with a high end smartphone/mirrorless/DSLR camera and get on Tinder. This will probably be the easiest way to start getting dates. Start going out on weekends. If your school is large enough to have a greek system rush and join a fraternity. Don't think, just do it. The opportunities it opens up are priceless. Don't listen to people saying it's not necessary. I didn't join a fraternity and made it work on my own but having the logistics and oppor…
/r/seduction06/06/17 11:04 PM
1

Try thinking about what you're actually doing to get out of the slump. I've found myself in many slumps in the last few years. I've gone from being able to approach almost 100 girls in a week (on a college campus) to just a few months later being too anxious to walk to the gym alone and face people. I've gone from sleeping with multiple girls at a time to going months with absolutely nothing. Any time I find myself in the slump, I get out of it by DOING. When I'm stuck in the slump, oftentimes I…
/r/seduction06/06/17 10:49 PM
2

It's not that YOU are low status, but it's likely you don't have the behavioral characteristics to hang around other people who are generally considered high status and not stand out. There's technically nothing stopping you from acting with the correct "high status" behaviors, but we tend to have a lot of blockage in this area if you weren't born into it and it's a lot of work uncovering and working through anxiety and trauma in this area. This is most of what we do here. So short answer ,some …
/r/seduction01/06/17 04:23 PM
1

This is a really broad question. First of all almost every person CAN be interesting. We all have our own unique story, and if you've really done interesting things and hobbies then you have a leg up on most people. Work on your storytelling, work on projecting your voice, work on holding attention. That's really all it is. It's just a skill. For example, look up RSDFreetour on Youtube and compare Tyler's speeches now to five years ago. The difference is NIGHT AND DAY. It all comes down to pract…
/r/seduction01/06/17 04:14 PM
6

Well you're doing the right moves, asking for time and directions. I suggest you go to an RSD Free Tour to meet other guys in this or just find a wing in general. Find somebody who can go direct and show it to you in person, and then put the pressure on. Create some emotional leverage. Give him cash. When I'm feeling anxious I'll give a friend $20-50 to hold onto until I approach.
/r/seduction31/05/17 07:35 PM
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There are always exceptions to any rule. You should take care of your body if you want to be a high performer, yet there are tons of successful people who have shit diets, poor health, and feel awful all the time. You're supposed to keep your back straight when you lift heavy stuff at the gym, yet you still see people with shit form that don't get hurt. In your particular case, serendipity and random chance also plays a factor. Insecure people can be drawn to other insecure people. People don't …
/r/seduction30/05/17 09:23 PM
6

First of all, stop the negative self talk. I'm not aware of the world around me. I don't know what is going on. I don't know where to start reading the news and forming opinions. Idon't have a personality that people would like and want to experience more. I'm horribly horribly beta. Never say any of this shit again. If you REALLY can't help yourself, reframe it by saying something like "I'm BEING horribly beta RIGHT NOW." Never attribute it to what you ARE, because it's simply not true, especia…
/r/seduction30/05/17 08:54 PM
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You have to take small steps towards it. Ultimately you just decide. There's nothing holding you back, and until you decide to just do it it will continue to hold you back. You can literally change your life and your fear by just following through and doing it and breaking the ilusion. You then just ride that momentum out and the next few times will be way easier. Fear is a crazy thing.
/r/seduction28/05/17 08:04 AM
2

Solid post. Agree 100%. Improve your life for you, but don't make the false assumption that it will lead to improvement in your dating life. You get girls by talking to them, not by self-improving.
/r/seduction24/05/17 03:54 PM
1

Five years ago when I was a sophomore in college I was just fed up with being alone and seeing people I had met a year prior but being too afraid to say hi again. I was dealing with a lot of other general self-esteem issues at the time but I was just generally really sad. All the time. I was really disappointed in how my life was playing out and how little control I had. I think it was a week after my 20th birthday when literally nobody wished me a happy birthday on facebook/text that I just sai…
/r/seduction24/05/17 03:21 PM
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Go seek therapy or mental health counseling if your University offers it. Mine did and it was a great resource when I was 20. Get off foreveralone. Never go back. It will keep you trapped in this mindset. The only way you get better at this is by talking small actions and slowly peeling away at your anxiety. This is possible for everyone, you just have to commit. I suggest you take a no negativity challenge. Fixing your negative self talk should be priority number 1.
/r/seduction24/05/17 05:23 AM
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This is really a quick way to socially ostracize yourself and ruin your reputation if you see these people on a regular basis.
/r/seduction19/05/17 10:44 PM
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It's just a tool. Doesn't replace approaching. I guarantee you any average guy who gets their fitness and fashion in check and takes great pictures will find girls who find them attractive and will swipe right. Everyone here LOVES to say girls will only swipe out on THE BEST most jacked, tallest, coolest looking guys... Try asking a girl how her last few Tinder dates went. I absolutely guarantee you she's hung out with and probably hooked up with somebody shorter, less attractive, and not as coo…
/r/seduction16/05/17 09:38 PM
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Alright man, you've convinced me. I take everything back. You have no chance. And I'm Asian, by the way.
/r/seduction16/05/17 09:18 PM
1

You're young. It comes with time and experiences. Start making decisions. Take action. If you're spending time on here, approach. Meet people. Learn more about yourself. Go through the bullshit and pain of life that comes with pursuing a goal. Survive. You'll become independent.
/r/seduction16/05/17 05:00 AM
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To each their own I guess. I just think the time wasted on online dating can be better spent doing more productive things that can help you meet partners in real life. Sure. Do what works for you. I hardly say 5-10 minutes a day during my lunch break is a waste of time when I can generally get around 2 hookups/solid leads a month to supplement my Fridays and Saturdays out. I wouldn't say tinder has an "incredible amount of opportunities" when the convert ratio is is so low, but then again I live…
/r/seduction16/05/17 04:58 AM
2

Hey man, pat yourself on the back for catching yourself in the moment and understanding these thoughts aren't productive. Most guys aren't there yet, and it's the first step in getting over these issues. A lot of this is experience, and letting go of the need to have control. Girls have the same freedom you do to see other people if you don't talk about exclusivity. It's natural to feel twinges of jealousy, especially when you're coming from a sense of scarcity. Getting more experiences, learnin…
/r/seduction15/05/17 09:49 PM
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How old are you two? Inexperience could be at play here. She could've just not known how to not handle the moment. Is she blowing you off now? If not I'd just try again. You can never know why a person does what they do for sure. If she's still around take it as interest and keep moving forward with it.
/r/seduction15/05/17 08:57 PM
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That has nothing to do with Tinder. It's a choice to not approach while using Tinder. Using Tinder can only provide benefits by increasing the amount of girls you are talking to. What you choose to do outside of Tinder (not approaching) is a different problem. Know that I understand what you're saying and can relate as I've been there as well. I have several friends who cannot approach to save their life but can get the occasional date through Tinder. I'm 6'0", athletic, tattooed, and have decen…
/r/seduction15/05/17 08:21 PM
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Reading your reply, and your other replies as well, it's pretty clear you haven't done any substantial self improvement at all. If you really commit to this and set goals (basic ones like get a job, stop taking drugs, find a hobby you're passionate about), your life WILL get better. You CANNOT say you've put a lot into self-improvement if you have literally nothing to say when asked what you've done.
/r/seduction15/05/17 08:14 PM
1

The fact that you're thinking about this so much is a huge indicator this is likely not going to work out for you. People do what they're going to do. I advise you to move on and meet other girls. Do your best to stop focusing and investing so much in other people. Invest in your own life instead. Move on. The more time you spend trying to get somebody to make your life better the less likely they're going to do it. If this girl ever would come around, it's because you moved on and stopped makin…
/r/seduction14/05/17 11:19 PM
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Have you actually improved? Where were you before and where are you now? Be honest with yourself. What have you done, and what are you doing now to get to your goal? It's natural to feel this way in the beginning, but you also need to check in and audit yourself from time to time to check if you're actually moving in the right direction.
/r/seduction14/05/17 11:13 PM
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Don't bother with tinder. Talk to people in person. Things will improve with time and practice. I disagree with this first part. Keep using Tinder, but also talk to people in person. Dating apps are a great way to play the numbers game and get more opportunities and continue to refine the confidence you've built by meeting people in person. They're only a supplement, not a replacement, to genuine social interactions. For a guy who's especially not confident, dating apps can help get him into mor…
/r/seduction14/05/17 11:11 PM
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It's not a dumb move to ask a girl if you can kiss her, but it is a dumb move to over-commit in escalation if she's not ready for it, as it communicates a lack of social understanding and can polarize her in the wrong direction and it can be difficult to come back from that. In this situation its likely you would have been rejected had you just gone in anyway. The answer to this question isn't to just go for it, the answer is to understand when it's right to kiss her. Were you two touching and g…
/r/seduction14/05/17 11:07 PM
1

Take action and meet more girls. When you start spending more time around girls and stop living in your head you'll start to realize girls have just as much problems if not more than you. They're just like you. They're just people who are trying to get by in life what what they have. In the case of attractive girls, they were simply born with certain advantages. They're still a human like you who deal with the same problems of insecurity and low self esteem. Life is not a zero sum game. As you t…
/r/seduction14/05/17 11:02 PM
1

Take off the taller than you in heels. Use Google... Too many guys are using that line. Just put your height. Put in some things that you're into that could be interesting to talk about. Your bio adds no value. It doesn't say anything unique about you, nor is it funny. Also most of Tinder is in the pictures, bio really doesn't mean much. Get good pictures with DSLRs/Mirrorless or have a friend with a good phone take good shots (my photographer friend has taken great shots for my Tinder profile w…
/r/seduction14/05/17 10:53 PM
1

Film yourself speaking. Record yourself speaking. Get in the habit of speaking louder than you think you need to. Warm your voice up before you need to be talking. Make sure you open your mouth adequately when you speak, most people speak lazily and don't allow the sound to travel out properly.
/r/seduction10/05/17 03:17 PM
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Dude, you provided absolutely no details of what you're doing with these girls besides smoke. Are you touching them? What were you doing before? Are they turning your advances down? Or are you just not doing anything, waiting for the girl to just fuck you?
/r/seduction01/05/17 12:54 AM
1

I think there is a difference between having standards, and CREATING standards that are far too unrealistic in order to prevent yourself from having to actually approach. Self awareness. Be honest with yourself. Only you know what you're actually attracted to.
/r/seduction27/04/17 12:15 AM
1

Haha well I can't give you advice on that man, I'm only 24. I'm sure age is going to have an impact but 32 is still young, I imagine late 30s and up starts putting you out of range. I've experimented with my bio for awhile, and I don't try to be clever anymore. I put my height up top, and just list out interests on different lines. I think its more important to not try too hard and disqualify yourself then win her over with the bio, but give her a chance to find something out about you if she wa…
/r/seduction25/04/17 11:25 PM
1

I have a sleeve that goes all the way down to two inches above my wrist. You should be wearing a collared shirt for interviews anyway, so don't worry about it.
/r/seduction24/04/17 02:57 AM
1

I had the same issue, and for me I realized one day I just didn't know how to move the interaction to a sexual space, and I was simply hoping it would magically happen or the girl would make it happen. Once I started working on that and pushing interactions there, my results changed dramatically.
/r/seduction24/04/17 02:55 AM
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I'm not. I'm Asian, 6'0", cut (190 lbs and 12% BF), have tattoos, and have a decent face. Most of my pictures come from DSLRs from a friend who does photography. If people really do say you should be a model, then you're probably losing a lot of girls based on some aspect of your profile. I'm not talking shit, I'm saying if you open your mind and change your strategy you'll probably start getting results.
/r/seduction24/04/17 02:49 AM
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You've got a big ego dude. Do you really think the problem isn't with you? That you aren't doing something wrong? In your pictures or with your actual image? It's Tinder and all the girls that are fucking bullshit? The entire female population in your city? I've hooked up with at least 20 girls in the past two years from Tinder and met two girlfriends on it. It works, you just have to play correctly, and play the numbers.
/r/seduction23/04/17 11:23 AM
1

Why do you want it? Are you trying to actually date her? If she does it to him she'll eventually do it to you. I can tell you already have your mind made up. Why are you even asking us? So we can tell you it's okay? If you want to do it keep doing what you're doing, if she wants to make the decision it'll be on her.
/r/seduction23/04/17 11:04 AM
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Are you planning on getting it on your face? Just cover it up.
/r/seduction23/04/17 10:59 AM
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I was walking around town today, and while I saw most of the girls holding hands with guys, it hit me that the majority of girls everywhere are taken, despite popular belief that they're not. So you saw a very small sample size of people, and now know universally a majority of girls are taken? Interesting. I'm currently sitting in a Starbucks and there are only men inside. It's now hitting me that mostly men go to Starbucks, despite the popular belief that women like pumpkin spice lattes. I've n…
/r/seduction23/04/17 02:16 AM
3

Go on a date. See her for an hour or two. There's really no alternative. If you don't, expect her to fade away. There's NO WAY you're using 100% of your time to studying. Find the time. Take a study break. Get a drink, coffee, anything.
/r/seduction21/04/17 04:30 PM
1

I do. I'm a huge fan of Simple Pickup and Project Go, and have done things like Simple 30 several times in the last few years. You're 18 man, you have a lot of time. It's also really awesome that you're thinking about these things thoroughly, and I think if you stick with this your life is going to change more than you ever anticipated. Just be patient. I was in a very similar place at 20. If you want, feel free to PM me. I'd be happy to offer you my perspective on anything.
/r/seduction21/04/17 04:26 PM
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I'm just curious how old are you? Are you in high school? College? I just want to understand the context of where your paradigm is coming from. You becoming more "extroverted" and going for approaches has nothing to do with you getting this girl, or makes it okay that you're not cutting your attachment to this girl. It is emotional attachment. I guarantee she's not the most attractive girl you've ever seen. Open Tinder. There are a surplus of attractive girls in the world. I've experienced this …
/r/seduction21/04/17 02:09 PM
3

So I've never been good at looking at girls as sexual beings. I try to think of them as equals and assume that they aren't looking for sex. Why does thinking of them as equals mean no sex? You seem to be attaching negative feelings towards sex. Wouldn't it make sense to assume they ALSO want sex if they're your equal? If a girl is with you in a situation like this, you have to assume they're interested. Girls don't put themselves in compromising situations unknowingly. I know this because I've t…
/r/seduction21/04/17 06:20 AM
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First of all, why are you assuming you'll never to get to experience younger girls after graduating college? I'm 24 and I date a lot of college students. If you live near a college, it's really not that crazy of a concept. We need to get more to the core of the issue, why does this make you so sad? Why do they have to be freshman/sophomore? Is a girl really not attractive after she ages past 18-20? Even bigger than that, why does the thought that you can't date them depress you so much? Why are …
/r/seduction21/04/17 06:15 AM
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You can fix things and change for the better, but you can't fix this situation with her. You can fix yourself, but you can't change anything about her. You don't even know if this girl was ever into you. You really have to take your emotions out of this and imagine if a girl you weren't interested in at all was obsessed with winning you over and "fixing" some imaginary connection she thought you had six months ago. It's kinda scary, which is why you have to nip these thoughts in the bud. They're…
/r/seduction21/04/17 04:55 AM
3

Just ask her out. A couple of weeks is an eternity. You also said it yourself, you're much better at dates than parties.
/r/seduction20/04/17 05:03 PM
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You don't fix a first impression, especially if it was as bad as you claimed. Learn from the lesson and move on. You can reattempt, but don't expect anything. You're not owed anything. You're not owed a second chance. This is how life works. I've had girls dtf and down to meet, and fucked it up by trying to close too hard and not going with the flow. Sometimes we fuck up. It's all good man. Also, stop living in your head and start interacting with the world. You said this happened SIX MONTHS AGO…
/r/seduction20/04/17 04:34 PM
3

I initially wrote something else, but honestly maybe she just lost interest for some random reason. It happens. If a girl likes you, she'll make it work.
/r/seduction20/04/17 05:41 AM
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Just do it. Stop her and motion for her to take them out. They're probably just listening to music. There's nothing inherently different about approaching somebody with headphones on.
/r/seduction20/04/17 03:01 AM
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You're leaving out a lot of important information. What happened on the first two dates? Why did you not kiss this girl on either of the first two? You say there was a ton of kino and "hand touching." Were you two ever holding hands? Or any type of overt touching where she is participating and making it clear you are both interested in each other? Kino for the sake of kino means absolutely nothing if you're not getting to a moment of "mutual caressing." You left a HUGE gap between this jealousy …
/r/seduction19/04/17 10:51 PM
2

This isn't just an isolated example. This continuously keeps happening in virtually 100% of cases over the past two years. How many approaches have you done? What sample size? Dating is a numbers game. Even online, you're going to message a large number of girls before finding girls who are receptive, and those girls are for the most part all single. Even when you get incredible at cold approach and screening, all you're really doing is going from a <1% success rate to a ~7% success rate. It's a…
/r/seduction19/04/17 08:03 PM
1

Don't go in with the expectation of getting laid. This is literally like a guy who has caught a few footballs in his life expecting to join a college football team having never trained in his life.
/r/seduction19/04/17 04:20 PM
1

if I text sometimes she won't reply. How do I keep working at it and trying to flirt with her? You don't keep working at it, if she wanted to reciprocate she would have. You can polarize if you want and ask to hang out alone and make a move so you know 100% how she feels. Girls aren't puzzles to be unlocked. How would you feel if some unattractive girl never stopped hitting on you and didn't get you weren't interested? When somebody isn't interested in you, you let it go. If you don't know if th…
/r/seduction19/04/17 04:45 AM
7

I thought it was a great book. I suggest reading it, especially if you loved Models. It's essentially his entire blog rewritten into a book, his ideas are much more refined here.
/r/seduction19/04/17 01:18 AM
1

It took me hitting rock bottom emotionally and realizing I wasn't deciding to not talk to girls, but that I couldn't. I was just tired of being held captive my by anxiety. Meeting guys who approached and were way better than me also broke me out of this cycle. Seeing my mentor at the time go direct and approach even when he admitted to feeling nervous and anxious really opened up my eyes to how soft I was.
/r/seduction18/04/17 10:58 PM
1

It's better than nothing, and you're correct it does screen for women who are interested. By those metrics it's a great method. As far as effectiveness goes you're going to lose a lot of girls who may have been interested if you had stuck around for a small bit of conversation. That's a trade-off you could argue for based on how little time you spend on non-interested girls.
/r/seduction18/04/17 12:10 AM
1

Nervous ticks (umms and ahhs) Talked too much (not enough tension) Too tentative in # closing Not enough statements, too many questions Played it safe, wouldn't make moves when the time came Didn't think about logistics and focused on the small stuff of escalation and not on big stuff that mattered Too focused on "performing kino" and not on developing a connection Too focused on approaching and gameplan and not connecting with girl Saying "umm" immediately after the stop when approaching in the…
/r/seduction17/04/17 10:52 PM
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Of course man. It took me 10 months to get my first lay from cold approach. A lot of fuckups and dates that went nowhere. I also tracked my approaches in a spreadsheet, recorded audio to analyze, and wrote daily field reports. If I didn't do all that analysis I don't think it would have gotten better, I found that I reached a point where my paradigm just shifted. It wasnt gradually better. What do you think your sticking points are? You're putting in the numbers but I think you'd do better doing…
/r/seduction16/04/17 04:49 AM
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Like I said, you need to provide a lot more detail. Most of the work is done in the approach, its fairly decided by that point whether she's interested or not. On the tactical level, all you really need to do is initiate a text conversation, small talk for a bit to get her to reply a couple of times and invest in the interaction, then ask her what her schedule is like the next few days or ask her if she wants to get a drink. Don't make it solid, just tentative if she would be down. I usually wai…
/r/seduction16/04/17 12:56 AM
1

What about your situation is awful? Youre not living in a dorm or have roommates, you have your own place. You have a bed. You're a student. Even if you weren't a student, you have everything you need. College students get laid all the time in shitty dorms with 1-2 roommates on a twin XL bed.
/r/seduction15/04/17 06:50 PM
1

I got this idea from Simple Pickup, put an A before their name in the contacts list so it'll keep them at the top. When they become a regular part of your life, take off the A. If they're not receptive or flakey put a Z instead and ping them occasionally. Im on Android and use Textra for my texting so I can schedule texts to be sent when I want them to be.
/r/seduction15/04/17 06:42 PM
1

I'm going to guess you're not seeing other girls, which is why you still have a crush on a girl who has done absolutely nothing to deserve your fixation. Meet other women who are actually interested in you.
/r/seduction15/04/17 06:28 PM
3

You've improves the product (yourself), now you need to actually market it to women. Self improvement is good and helps make you more attractive but you actually need to learn how to talk to women... To get better with women. What are you doing to address this? You've made no mention if you're approaching or trying to implement basic seduction concepts.
/r/seduction15/04/17 06:12 PM
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You need to provide a lot more detail. This could be a number of things, from looking like absolute dogshit, having ridiculous nervous ticks that you aren't even aware of, boring conversation, not picking up that girls are actually interested, not knowing how to text to actually secure the date, etc. What do you look like? How do conversations actually go? What is your gameplan? How are you feeling in set? How are the girls feeling? Are you feeling connections with any of these girls?
/r/seduction15/04/17 03:20 PM
1

Keep doing it. That's really all. You're really not giving much detail for anything more in-depth. Good job on approaching. Btw, your name... You an IE?
/r/seduction14/04/17 08:39 PM
2

I read through most of your post but I won't go into specifics. I read The Game when I was 14-15. Didn't implement anything, got to college and got wrecked. Super introvert, barely could talk to anybody. On my 20th birthday I decided I would do whatever it took. I approached 100+ girls a month the first 3-4 months. I slowed down after and I didn't get laid until 10 months after I started doing this with intention. Nowadays I sleep with a new girl or two every month if that's what I'm trying to d…
/r/seduction14/04/17 06:18 PM
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You need to learn to see a girl as just another person like you, not as "a girl." She's not much different than you, and when you break down the barriers you've put up between the two of you you'll stop being as nervous. Now, you do this by exposure. Put yourself in fearful situations, and learn what the real outcomes are. Most of what you fear is in your head because you don't know what it's actually like to walk up to, talk to, and hang out with these girls.
/r/seduction12/04/17 04:06 PM
3

Dude no shit. You can't control another human being, if she's not down she's not down. She always has the power to decide how SHORT your interaction will go. You have that same power too.
/r/seduction10/04/17 06:16 AM
2

It sucks when you think a date went well, only to find this situation. It happens though, it's just part of the game. I think a part of this whole PUA thing is we get this idea that we did something wrong or could have done something better when we "fail." We forget that a date is just two people trying to find out if they're compatible and want to be with each other. The person you end up dating should want you just as much as you want them. Remember this when you have these kinds of dates, and…
/r/seduction09/04/17 11:43 PM
4

Until you learn to be okay with your awkwardness and fear of girls in the past, you'll continue driving people away. You don't need to SHARE the story (emotional vomit like Manson puts it) to be vulnerable, but you need to be OKAY with sharing it if somebody asks. It's not the story that turns people off, it's your attitude towards it. Have you never seen a success story or watched a confident man or women talk about being at rock bottom (homeless, drugs, broken home, etc) and getting to where t…
/r/seduction09/04/17 11:35 PM
12

Hey man, good job. You learned a really important lesson. Trust me though when I say it does impact things. Your physique strongly impacts the impression you leave on people, even if it takes awhile for your identity to catch up and accept it.
/r/seduction08/04/17 10:45 PM
1

How long have you been doing this? It's going to feel like you're faking it for awhile. For a LONG time. Longer than you want to deal with when you're in the thick of it. One day though you're going to notice you can banter without trying, you know how to grab her hand when you want to, and you can ask her to leave with you without feeling like a fake. It takes awhile for your identity to catch up.
/r/seduction07/04/17 04:46 PM
1

I don't get why so many guys think about this. Most girls that are down to fuck casually ARE NOT going to immediately assume relationship. If anything they're going to be fucking other guys and leaving you in the dust. Don't project this good girl vibe onto girls. Girls do what girls do. I've had numerous friends with benefits relationships over the years and you just have sex. This "talk" never comes up if you're escalating to sex immediately, the only talks that have come up, with the exceptio…
/r/seduction07/04/17 07:09 AM
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Im in Portland now, but I got started in Seattle approaching in college. There's a pretty decent sized crew that goes out regularly in Cap Hill (don't go anywhere else, seriously). I've got a friend that's pretty dialed into that group, PM me and I can try and connect you. Look up the next RSD Free tour, they always hit Seattle. I've met a number of going out friends that way.
/r/seduction07/04/17 06:10 AM
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Yeah pretty much. I think guys on here are way too sensitive about the viability of online dating. I've probably slept with handful of girls from straight up cold approach, whereas I've slept with 20+ from online over the years. It's just another tool. Side note, do you read GLL?
/r/seduction07/04/17 03:09 AM
1

You fall for these girls as a symptom of you thinking you're not in her league. You will continue falling for girls until you address your self esteem and worth and know what you have to offer a girl is enough.
/r/seduction07/04/17 02:04 AM
1

You should really just not. There are tons of girls out there that are single. Even if you do really connect, you're not laying a good foundation for a healthy relationship and if even a part of you is guilty about it, its going to erode your ability to trust yourself and other girls knowing that you're condoning and partaking in cheating.
/r/seduction06/04/17 05:13 PM
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I don't see online dating as any better or worse then approaching in person. It's all a numbers game. When you're in person you get the benefit of at least connecting with somebody whether they're down or not, and it improves your social skills, so it can feel much less soulless than swiping left or right and sending messages with no response. First dates are first dates. If you don't know how to create an emotional connection and escalate physically, your first dates are going to suck from onli…
/r/seduction06/04/17 05:11 PM
1

That's fair. You gotta think about this from a woman's perspective. I thought the same as you when I started but it makes sense. Imagine if you got approached all the time, and every girl who approached you was carrying a knife. Most girls are unattractive and awkward. You're going reject most of them, but what if one freaks out and tries to attack you? This is what it's like to be a girl. Every guy they meet has the potential to physically harm them, stalk them, etc. Theyre incredibly vulnerabl…
/r/seduction05/04/17 05:38 PM
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I think if you have to ask if it's creepy, it's creepy. And not that it's creepy universally, but it's creepy FOR YOU to do it. If you aren't comfortable and know something isn't creepy, you likely aren't developed to the point where you can properly access these things. That being said, you're going to have to push the boundaries of creepy while you develop your awareness. Also, in my opinion what you did was a bit try-hard. I wouldn't say creepy, but you definitely stepped beyond what is appro…
/r/seduction04/04/17 10:02 PM
20

Just break it off. She broke up with you. You're doing anything you can to hold on to her and she's going to resent you for it. You're going to resent her for it. There's nothing about this situation that you wanted. Break it off.
/r/seduction03/04/17 06:19 PM
2

I think that's a bit extreme to say never. I usually ask if they're down to meet up, get the #, then set up over text. I think it's pretty valuable getting off of Tinder immediately and into actual texting, even if you're sending the same messages. It's a smaller amount of compliance to ask for than going directly for the hangout and it helps differentiate you from other guys when you're not blending in with her other 500+ matches.
/r/seduction03/04/17 06:17 PM
4

I started approaching a few years ago when I was a sophomore at a school of 40k students. I approached at least 300-400 girls. I was called out twice over three years by two girls after I had gotten their phone numbers, and there were no repercussions afterwards. I was also part of the orientation program and was highly visible on campus. Never had any problem. If you're not weird and overly aggressive about it it's not a big deal. Sure, you recognize some people. There are still TENS OFTHOUSAND…
/r/seduction28/03/17 04:20 PM
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You're probably not going to find conservative girls who don't party on Tinder.
/r/seduction24/03/17 11:48 PM
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Tinder Plus can be pretty useful. Extra super likes (visually makes your match stand out, I've hooked up with girls who said they only talk to super likes cause they get so many matches) and a free boost per month boost (instantly nets you several times more matches) isn't a bad deal, especially if you get it on one of their sales. Swiping in other areas is fun to set up before you visit an area, and unlimited likes and the ability to rewind is very handy.
/r/seduction24/03/17 11:47 PM
1

What do you mean by IOI? No, you should not do any kino without any indication of interest. That being said, most of the time you should be screening girls so that their choice to continue interacting with you is an indication of interest. Moving interactions into isolation and being direct with your language should be enough. A girl is very unlikely to get a drink with me, accept me telling her I think she's sexy, or come back to my place without being interested.
/r/seduction24/03/17 11:43 PM
1

Online game is just another tool. I started cold approaching in college when Tinder was just starting, nowadays since I work full-time most of the girls I hook up with come from Tinder. I probably wouldn't be nearly as effective though had I not built up a strong base of confidence and reference experiences from cold approach. Cold approach is much more efficient in creating real connections and converting a higher %, but you can't beat the numbers game of online. I've slept with WAY more girls …
/r/seduction23/03/17 06:42 PM
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I find that Mark Manson is very much "Red Pill" in his ideology, he just doesn't take it to the extreme levels of bitterness as that sub-reddit. Manson talks about navigating the world as it is, the good and bad, whereas Red Pill has very much gone down immediately assuming the negative about women to protect yourself from harm.
/r/seduction22/03/17 05:15 PM
3

Is it true that sometimes getting laid is more just a numbers game and that sometimes you're just destined to never be with a woman? Getting laid is a numbers game. Life in general is a numbers game. When I quit my first job out of college it took me over 100 applications to get hired again. I'm a strong performer at work. It's just the way the world works. There's limitless opportunity, but there's also no limit to your competition. You have to play the numbers. Over time, your numbers get bett…
/r/seduction22/03/17 04:56 PM
1

I used to record audio a few years ago when I first started out to review by myself to pick out nervous ticks and go over what I could've done better. It was a very helpful practice.
/r/seduction21/03/17 05:41 PM
1

That being said I agree with you. It's not black and white and you need to decide what you're willing to live with. Did you not read this last part of my comment? I'm not disagreeing with you. You just rehashed what I said in several paragraphs.
/r/seduction15/03/17 11:24 PM
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You're exaggerating my point. Communication is a basic relationship component. This isn't about a slight incompatibility and differences in personality, it's the basis of any relationship. That being said I agree with you. It's not black and white and you need to decide what you're willing to live with.
/r/seduction13/03/17 03:06 PM
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Have you thought to consider why you would even want such a person in your life as a dating partner if she doesn't align with your communications needs? Why do you have to figure out a solution? Why not next her and find someone who actually puts in effort?
/r/seduction11/03/17 10:50 PM
3

Are you even talking to girls? It doesn't matter how much you upgrade your car if you never drive it. You need to approach or get on dating apps/websites. Nowhere in your post did you mention doing anything to talk to girls.
/r/seduction11/03/17 10:30 AM
1

The point isn't to not push for an outcome, but to be okay even if it doesn't pan out the way you want.
/r/seduction11/03/17 10:27 AM
1

Yes man, if you become more attractive physically it makes a huge difference. People like healthy, attractive looking people. Try to be as healthy and attractive as possible.
/r/seduction09/03/17 10:12 PM
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Eat more food and go to the gym. Seriously make this a focus. Approach. Apply concepts you read about (Or watch RSD videos and apply those concepts). That's really all there is to it dude.
/r/seduction08/03/17 04:52 PM
1

I'm 24 right now, started doing this when I was 20. Taken a lot of breaks in between, I'm currently trying to ramp up again to where I used to be in the past. I strongly recommend attending an RSD Free Tour if they come to your city. It's how I got started with all this and I met some motivated guys to go out and approach with. This is hard to do alone and having somebody to keep you accountable is huge. If you want to talk about details, feel free to PM me. But just start. Start approaching, st…
/r/seduction08/03/17 04:50 PM
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3-4 weeks? Have some patience man. How much are you approaching? Think long term dude. How much experience have you had before this? When I first started I had a few girlfriends prior but it still took me 10 months to get laid, and I approached at least hundred a month the first few months. Also have you improved in other areas? Your appearance? Your approach? Your strategy? Your post is focused on negativity and the experience of being alone, and not on what you're doing wrong that you can impr…
/r/seduction26/02/17 05:17 AM
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How many times did you see her during this time period? Why were you so invested in the first place? At the first sight of flakiness I would curb any additional investment and put more effort into other leads.
/r/seduction06/02/17 04:16 PM
1

If you want an all purpose signature scent I highly reccomend Invictus or Invictus Aqua. Has citrus and aquatic notes for the summer, but is sweet and projects well for the colder months too. Edgy and sweet, I consistently get compliments with it.
/r/seduction05/02/17 10:31 PM
4

Screen for it. Invite a girl to your house as the first date. Invite her to your house to smoke/drink. If they're down, they're most likely down for fast escalation.
/r/seduction19/01/17 05:08 AM
2

What do you mean, you have no chemistry with eachother? Why are you pursuing her then? Ask her to hangout. Get coffee, whatever, but just you two alone. Invite her to hangout at night. Invite her for drinks. Invite her to situations where she has to decide if she's interested or not and if she comes you'll know if you can make a move or not.
/r/seduction16/01/17 07:48 AM
1

Just don't make any overt moves until you've properly gauged her interest. That means don't ask her out on a date, or make a random uncalibrated physical grab at her and freak her out. Escalate the logistics and see if she'll comply. Hang out with her alone. Get drinks alone. Invite her over late night to hang out alone. If she complies it's pretty likely you can make the move without getting rejected. If she turns down your invitations, she's probably not interested.
/r/seduction16/01/17 07:44 AM
5

... What kind of online are you doing? Tinder and OkCupid and those apps/websites have profiles with pictures. Don't talk to anyone without pictures. Your entire post is complaining about the other person. You then say you'd have to be a fool to cold approach, and that we can write your messages. Nowhere do you ask what YOU can do to improve, what YOU can do differently, what YOU can do to change your circumstances. It's you. It's your toxic mindset. It's probably your communication. It's probab…
/r/seduction16/01/17 07:40 AM
8

First of all, use the popular ones. Tinder. OkCupid. That's like needing a job but not going to career fairs, using LinkedIn, or any online application. It's a necessary step. Also, nowhere in your post did you post ANYTHING about things you could do to improve. Nothing about your pictures, your profile, your style of messaging, nothing. You're just complaining. Online dating is hard, but it's no harder than anything else in life. Adapt and correct your course through trial and error, or get bea…
/r/seduction09/01/17 07:48 AM
1

Tinder. OkCupid. Join a gym, join some activity groups, recreational sports teams, work clubs, etc.
/r/seduction08/01/17 05:14 PM
2

Break up with her or stop worrying about it. Thinking about "maintaining your game" when you are in a relationship is not only unhealthy for the relationship, but also just unhealthy for you. Do you really think without it your value is going to plummet? How would you feel if your girl went out and hit on dudes cause she missed the feeling of excitement? Coming from someone who's been there, this relationship is already fucked if you think you need to do this. You're doing this because you don't…
/r/seduction08/01/17 05:13 PM
3

So you went out to get drinks with a group of girls, AS FRIENDS, and are confused why you aren't getting signs of sexual interest? Why would you expect to be getting overt signs of interest from women that you haven't communicated any interest to, in a situation that would strongly discourage showing interest? Does this mean you're meant to relentlessly pursue the girl and make your intentions very clear until she just flat out rejects you? I just feel like that's a bit intense and if she doesn'…
/r/seduction08/01/17 05:09 PM
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Don't overthink it. People don't care about you as much as you think. I approached hundreds of girls in a way I would never recommend to guys (typical daygame PUA stuff like running after girls and stopping them) when I was in college and was called out on it maybe 3 times. No big deal. My school had a population of 40,000. I held a very public leadership position at the school some time after and it never came back to me. Just be respectful, don't be a creep, you'll be fine.
/r/seduction04/01/17 07:40 PM
1

If you aren't willing to make the necessary changes and course correct when things aren't working, you won't have success in anything you pursue.
/r/seduction03/01/17 06:38 PM
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This is a pointless question. Unless you're horrifically disfigured or have some incredibly tragic disability of that nature, and fit within the average range of dudes, you can become more attractive and girls will like you. Even if you do become successful, a FUCK ton of girls still won't like you. 9+/10 girls won't sleep with me. I'm very happy with my dating life. It's all good. It took me about 3-4 years to stop worrying about this stuff. I failed a LOT along the way. Where does this sub say…
/r/seduction03/01/17 10:07 AM
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You have no standards and don't value yourself and your time. Other people treat you appropriately. This is a complicated issue. Most of it is fundamental side bar content. Top post content. That's your how.
/r/seduction03/01/17 10:01 AM
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I know a ton of people who do this and are unsuccessful. I know a ton of people in almost everything who are unsuccessful. If you aren't willing to make the necessary changes and course correct when things aren't working, you won't have success in anything you pursue.
/r/seduction02/01/17 11:58 PM
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i Just want a gf no matter what her personality is. unfortunately no girl talks to me. That's why.
/r/seduction02/01/17 11:56 PM
10

This is pretty spot on. Opener doesn't mean much, usually I'll ask how tall she is cause I like short girls and it's an oddball question. Casual joking back and forth, tell her I think she's cute, ask her how she feels about meeting up sometime, get the #. Don't talk explicitly about sex or things you want to do and create an expectation on her end, I find it screens a lot of girls out that could've been interested on the date. This is different than telling a girl you find her sexy. Like said a…
/r/seduction01/01/17 07:56 PM
2

I've found this to be the case, especially when it seems like the girl really wants to. They'll often commit hard to their "rule" for that night, then openly talk about sex prior to the next meet up when it happens.
/r/seduction01/01/17 04:46 AM
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I use Evernote now, used Google Drive in the past. I make a new entry for each day (pick morning or night). Just write briefly about the major things that happened, moves you tried to make, and any insights you can think of. Doesn't have to be long, just enough notes to remember what you think was important. Anything that got you down, anything that you did great and made you feel like a badass. At the bottom I'll write down 3-4 things I was grateful for.
/r/seduction01/01/17 03:01 AM
4

You should have a game plan and be moving things forward. What're you doing to move your interactions forward? Conversation and even kino aren't what get you laid. Making moves and escalating the interaction gets you laid. You can think of conversation and to a lesser degree touch as simply ways to provide a context for two people who have a physical attraction. You ask what to improve to escalate further. You simply need to escalate. Try to move her around. Isolate her to create more private lo…
/r/seduction31/12/16 11:18 AM
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I thoroughly recommend it. When you can look back on months or years of journaling and realize you don't relate to your old toxic thought patterns, you'll realize how far you've come.
/r/seduction31/12/16 11:09 AM
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I started posting here when I was 20 and asked for help. Somebody PMed me, invited me to an RSD Free Tour. I'm 24 now. I can't even relate to having the same problems with dating that I used to have. Start working on this. You'll be glad you did. One day you won't worry about it at all.
/r/seduction31/12/16 11:05 AM
1

Stop overanalyzing everything as if you have total control of the scenario. If she invited you she's most likely interested in you. Set a course that leads to sex, and escalate until she stops you or you're getting what you want. Commit. Right now this is all just mental masturbation. Unless you're describing how she reacted to a physical advance all this idle chatter and posturing between the two of you means nothing.
/r/seduction31/12/16 04:41 AM
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Where are you staying? In general you can count on XS, Marquee, Light, Hakkasan. Probably in that order. Check the schedule for the Thunder Down Under show, when the show ends there's a bar near Excalibur where women often stop afterwards when their buying temperature is extremely high. I've heard it's a great place and time to pull.
/r/seduction30/12/16 06:23 PM
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The only circumstance I wouldn't do this is if you're tagging along with her friends or to a party where you don't know anybody. You don't want to be in a position where you're sucked into her world and you're out of control but she still is. Even then if you have the right personality and play it right it would be fine.
/r/seduction30/12/16 06:18 PM
1

You should probably do it. Just be upfront with her so she doesn't have any inappropriate expectations. You don't have much experience so it'll probably be good for you, and you both will have a good time. At the very least you'll learn where your standards truly are.
/r/seduction30/12/16 01:48 AM
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It's something you grow into. I don't think of myself as "the prize," but I'm very aware of what I have to offer. You may need to cultivate those qualities, or you need to realize the worth of what you're already bringing. I've found journaling and taking account of everything you're doing and the things you've accomplished to be helpful in getting a good idea of where you at in life. I think more than anything that as you get experience with women you realize you offer a lot and can start filte…
/r/seduction30/12/16 12:54 AM
8

How much belief changes the way you play the game. I didn't have much belief in myself or the things I did when I started, and now that I've had enough experiences I can see the signs and have few doubts in how situations will play out. I try less and things go my way more often. By getting good at pickup and changing these limiting beliefs, you realize you can apply this to anything in life. This opens up A LOT of doors. Letting go of the outcome is incredibly powerful. When you stop trying to …
/r/seduction29/12/16 10:41 AM
2

Move.
/r/seduction29/12/16 10:27 AM
1

This is a losing perspective to take. You share your time with everybody. You parents shared your time as a child when you grew up. That sandwich you bought was from a business sharing in business with other customers. Nothing is 100% yours. These girls are always in contact with other men, just like you should always be in contact with other women. It doesn't mean she's married to these guys or made any kind of commitment to them.
/r/seduction29/12/16 10:25 AM
10

Honestly dude I don't think you should do anything. She's your business partner and she's always staying at your place. There's a lot that can go wrong if she's not into you, which is a very likely possibility. Focus on your development. Talk to more people. Grow out of your shyness. You could make a move on this girl, but even if we gave you advice you wouldn't execute it exactly how it needs to be done. If you're going to make a move just do it however you want to but understand and accept the…
/r/seduction28/12/16 09:21 PM
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Both times I never mentioned the words "date" to her. Second date I did some kino but never was able to escalate to a romantic level. Okay, so you haven't communicated your romantic interest at all and these are platonic hangouts, and she's taking them on good faith that you aren't interested in her. See at work we're both really compatible. We're talking really well and teasing and having fun and talking about our personal lives. But when we're out she kind of shy's away and keeps the conversat…
/r/seduction28/12/16 11:44 AM
1

What's your timing in asking for the hangout? Typically I'll baby step it after 10-15 messages back and forth asking "how do you feel about meeting up sometime", then asking for the #, messaging a bit more over text, making loose plans for boba or drinks depending on age, then asking the day of for actual confirmation. Appearing over eager is the worst especially over Tinder. I don't see much value in precisely gauging rapport over text before the first date. Simply message back and forth enough…
/r/seduction28/12/16 11:19 AM
2

Meet other girls dude. Literally nothing more to say. You attached yourself to your fantasy of this girl and nothing more. This is why you communicate your intentions from the beginning rather than building up this ideal image of a person. You're not even in love with her, you're in love with the IDEA of her. You don't know how she is in a relationship. You don't know she's exactly what you're looking for. Hell, you probably don't even know what you're looking for. Meet more girls. Live in the r…
/r/seduction28/12/16 11:00 AM
3

You really have two choices dude. Stay bitter, and be angry that other's have had experiences you didn't... Or realize it doesn't fucking matter, your life is your own, we're going to FUCKING DIE, a few years is NOTHING, you can get what you want out of this life, and you'll be happier if you just let it go. This applies to everything. There are kids richer than you or I will ever be. You can choose to be jealous, or just be happy as you progress in your own career. There are guys better at bask…
/r/seduction28/12/16 10:52 AM
1

You stop putting girls on pedestals by interacting with them and accepting the way girls really are, not how you envision them to be in your head.
/r/seduction28/12/16 10:38 AM
1

I graduated college in 2015. I'm more of an introvert so I don't engage with it too much but definitely there are still big circles of young people hanging out and partying, especially in bigger cities. My dating life is way more active now that I'm out of college. If you play your cards right don't worry about your social life after college. It's very possible.
/r/seduction27/12/16 10:09 PM
1

On a lower level, I'll tell you don't worry about post college life. I've hooked up with FAR more girls out of college than when I was in it. If you're in a big city I found it gets a lot better when you're actually a real adult and not a broke college kid with shaky confidence. On the second part, it's something you'll grow into eventually. Don't be too hard on yourself. Know intellectually you don't need the validation of women to be happy, even tho it feels otherwise. When you've had enough e…
/r/seduction27/12/16 10:07 PM
1

If you can make the trek up to Seattle and go to Capital Hill (Barca/Unicorn/ChaChas/Rhein Haus) you'd be in much better shape. There's not a huge scene down in Tacoma. Nevermind. You're <21. Join activities. Join a gym. Take classes. Get around people your age. Start with that. Meet their friends. Grow from there.
/r/seduction25/12/16 02:38 AM
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Being 6'2" is a game changer and is going to help you way more than your acne scarring hinders you. If it will give you peace of mind get the treatment, but it will be mostly for you so long as you take care of the rest of your image.
/r/seduction18/12/16 02:30 AM
1

Honestly man I'm really not sure. There aren't any obvious gaps right now in your game from what I can tell, but there are huge areas where you could be lacking. Could be in your vibe, could be a lack of aggressiveness, too serious, not conveying your personality enough, not having interests to relate to girls with, etc. Maybe you just aren't seeing the signs and think girls are unreceptive when they're just shy. If you want to PM me we could talk more, but I think we'd need to go into a lot mor…
/r/seduction17/12/16 09:28 PM
9

This is great packaging of a fundamental idea. I'll be sharing this with my friends. Thanks.
/r/seduction17/12/16 09:22 PM
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It is worth it to note though that shaking a girls hands is a viable option when done right. Shaking a girls hand then lingering with her hands in yours can be very powerful. I typically go for hand shakes unless there a strong mutual contact between us.
/r/seduction15/12/16 09:57 PM
1

Go see a therapist and read The Truth by Neil Strauss. I found it tremendously helpful in getting past these same feelings. He talks about the compulsiveness and low self esteem that often gets people into and hooked to pickup, and how he went about working on his issues.
/r/seduction15/12/16 07:42 PM
1

If you want to keep leveraging your ability to make friends and use your social circle join a fraternity. It's the one thing I wouldve done different in college. It's all on a spectrum. Some are all about getting stuff done, some are party idiots who drop out after sophomore year. Most are in the middle. Social circle isn't the most important in larger schools and I did fine without intentionally developing one for the purpose of girls, but in party circles or any smaller communities social circ…
/r/seduction15/12/16 07:32 PM
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I think we need to redirect this conversation, I don't think I was very clear in my first reply. Of the successes you have had, how did they play out? From that, do you have an idea of what a "successful interaction" looks like from start to finish? How many girls take interest in you before losing it? How do your interactions usually play out? I'm not entirely sure what advice to give you because there's a lot of necessary information missing. What do you look like? Style, height, fitness, what…
/r/seduction13/12/16 06:27 AM
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Obviously what everyone else has said, you need to approach. Create leverage to approach, commit to it, put money on it, whatever. Are you on Tinder? At 6'4" and white and decent looking like you say you should do work on there.
/r/seduction12/12/16 02:03 AM
2

I have sleeves and this is a great way to start a conversation and form commonalities. Also really easy to sexualize an interaction depending on their location on her if she does have any. Also, you could just not overthink it and say "thanks."
/r/seduction11/12/16 11:21 PM
2

I second all of this.
/r/seduction11/12/16 11:17 PM
1

Why are you depressed? Do you have any goals?
/r/seduction11/12/16 11:09 PM
3

You're over thinking and freaking out because you're in scarcity and this is the only girl you have in your life, so you're brain is appropriately freaking out. Meet girls in real life. This will sort itself out. You'll learn to have realistic expectations.
/r/seduction11/12/16 11:04 PM
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What is your goal? You talk about running out of things to say. Is your goal to have an endless conversation? Or move towards sex? What're you doing to bring yourself closer to that goal? What do you think your sticking points are? What's holding you back? What are you doing to work on them? I'm suspecting you're stalling out because you just assume things will continue if you keep talking and you aren't actively leading things in the direction you want. Correct me if I'm wrong.
/r/seduction11/12/16 10:58 PM
1

Yes, it does. This is an obvious answer. It will make a difference in all interactions. People like attractive people. Again man you already know the answer to this question. And I answered it in my comment. It will make you more attractive, girls will like you more. Your results will be better. Everything is easier if the girl already likes you. It is NOT a replacement for having game.
/r/seduction10/12/16 02:55 AM
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Yes, it does. This is an obvious answer. It will make a difference in all interactions. People like attractive people. That being said, it's not an excuse. Work with what you have, and work to improve it for the future.
/r/seduction10/12/16 02:40 AM
1

Like others have said, your friend is definitely leaving things out. I used to write long extensive field reports after dates a few years ago to try and learn everything I could, nowadays I write a brief summary like your friends in my daily journal. To answer your question, NO, you cannot make a move without IOIs. What you're potentially missing, and I can relate to this, is that you perhaps aren't recognizing the IOIs, or you aren't ELICITING IOIs from her. I used to go on date after date and …
/r/seduction10/12/16 02:27 AM
2

Because it doesn't matter. Just because you say the same things doesn't mean you'll get the same results. Watching an NFL highlight reel doesn't make you better at football.
/r/seduction04/12/16 04:03 AM
2

From your post and from the way you're engaging others posting here it sounds like you're lacking in self awareness. Or empathy. I don't know what you're doing wrong but you're making the girls uncomfortable in some major way. Lashing out and calling them out for making an excuse to get away from you isn't productive. I would recommend getting some headphones with a mic and recording your approaches with your phone. That's really the only way we can give you real advice at this point. 53 is a sm…
/r/seduction02/12/16 06:25 AM
2

Damn. I remember 2-3 years ago you gave me spot on advice when I was in a jam and you're still killing it. To echo this, I've found a lot more satisfaction out of accepting who I was, living the life I wanted, and then finding the girls who were compatible within that framework. I was always more compatible and enjoyed being around the girls that fit in without much effort on my part.
/r/seduction25/11/16 12:25 PM
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I'm confused, why are you feeling betrayed? Girls don't owe you anything. Don't invest emotionnaly before she does. This is correct.
/r/seduction23/11/16 02:10 AM
0

You don't need to explicitly tell her, most of it is going to be in the frequency of contact and the way you interact with her.
/r/seduction23/11/16 02:06 AM
2

I would recommend attending their Free Tours and seeing them speak in person. Meeting Tyler/Julian/Alex in person was a mindfuck in seeing how well they spoke, how their vibe felt, and hearing it directly from their mouths. I also paid for Julian's World Tour, which was only $50. Any more than that I can't say is worth it. Also a great side benefit of these events are the people you meet. A lot of weird as hell, but you can find some cool guys in the same place as you wanting to improve. Helped …
/r/seduction22/11/16 11:42 PM
0

Yes. You should go for girls that like you. In fact, you should ONLY go for girls that like you. In your case if you like her back do whatever you want. You don't have to date her, when or wherever you feel like you don't like her enough to continue past a certain point just stop.
/r/seduction22/11/16 11:40 PM
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Hey man, I can relate to you a lot. I'm two years out of college now but I dived deep into this stuff pretty hard at the beginning of my 2nd year. It took a few hundred approaches to gets numbers/dates, and even then I couldn't close for shit. Took me at least 3 years to really feel confident with women despite getting some results. I barely even approach now. It really is a paradigm shift you have to make. I hated reading replies and people online saying I wanted it too much, or I had to be ent…
/r/seduction22/11/16 11:37 PM
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First of all, stop seeing things as a WIN or a LOSE. When you don't get a "loss" the girls aren't winning. You're getting bitter because you're objectifying woman and objectifying yourself as well. In your frame a win is simply meeting somebody you're compatible with, a loss is meeting somebody who you aren't compatible with. Nothing you do is going to turn that into a win, because it's not a loss. It'll help you deal with these emotions if you drop the frame you've been using. Like others have …
/r/seduction17/07/16 08:30 PM
1

That's probably just part of the game. Try recording the audio of your approaches with headphones and your phone and see if you can reflect on what's going wrong afterwards. Helped me a lot when I was getting started.
/r/seduction08/07/16 02:41 AM
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How are these rejections happening? Is there no positive feedback at all? 25-30 approaches without a lay/solid phone number is reasonable, but to get absolutely nothing is indicative of you doing something very wrong.
/r/seduction07/07/16 10:01 PM
1

Gave you ever considered the irony of you complaining about this when you are literary posting on a form called /seduction? And you're not alone in this feeling, I'm sure a lot of us have felt this way at some point. Men are socialized into connecting our self worth and self esteem to our sex life. If you get laid, you're the man. You're judging these girls out of jealousy because it threatens your self worth because they have easy access to something you subconsciously feel makes you a valuable…
/r/seduction14/06/16 10:09 AM
2

Just say you're busy, you don't need to give all the details of what you're doing. She's probably seeing other people as well. If you get the feeling she's investing in you then clear things up by clarifying you're seeing other people and you want to make sure you're both on the same page.
/r/seduction08/06/16 12:17 PM
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Why is this a problem? Are you 16? Do you share a room with your sisters? I don't see why taking a girl back to your place would be a problem in this case.
/r/seduction08/06/16 12:15 PM
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Okay, how did you react when they insisted they needed help googling something. Or asking how to turn their computer on for the 10th time.
/r/seduction05/06/16 04:49 PM
1

You don't have to do it all in one day, but you have to do a little bit most days. Small consistent effort can yield huge changes. Figure out what that end goal looks like, or at least get a rough direction to move in, and start taking action. Enough time and your life will be different. You just have to commit to taking the small steps. If you don't nothing will ever happen.
/r/seduction04/06/16 12:22 PM
1

Don't even address it. Please don't use any of the lines anyone else has posted, reacting like this reeks of insecurity. If she still finds you unattractive she's not going to change her mind because of some cover up line you say denting your past actions, it's just going to reconfirm what she thought or turn her back off again if she was reconsidering you. Also, why would she even explicitly call you out and ask if you're still mad? Did you react all pissed off when she said to just be friends?…
/r/seduction04/06/16 12:15 PM
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Have you ever had to give tech support to your patents or other older person who was tech illiterate?
/r/seduction04/06/16 12:05 PM
2

You're operating with faulty assumptions. Engineering is not an excuse. It's a lesser point now that you're finished, but don't look back to engineering as a reason for not having sex. I majored in engineering. It's not that big of a deal. Girls are human. Girls like sex. You say the type of girls you want to have sex with don't want an open relationship. Where's your proof? Have you tried having casual sex with these girls? More girls than you think are fine with casual sex. There is no such th…
/r/seduction30/05/16 06:13 PM
3

I can relate to your story when I first got into this stuff. I was a state level track and field athlete in high school so I had a good body and looks going into college. Incredibly passive and disconnected from desires. What helped me was making a SMALL goal I had to stick to that was a little past my comfort zone. I could get girls on dates but I couldn't get physical, so I made the goal to touch them on the arm a few times. Then it was put a hand on their knee for a few seconds. Then it was i…
/r/seduction30/05/16 04:53 PM
2

Sure man. I don't want to take over your thread with my story but the biggest thing I learned with girls like these is that they're not special or different from anyone else. Not to take away from what they offer and what captures your interest, but I realized a girl being special is not unique or especially valuable, whereas my emotional well being and stability in life needs to come first. There are other special girls that are better for us that we won't have to make sacrifices for. Don't be …
/r/seduction28/05/16 01:57 AM
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From a guy who's been there and done it... Don't. Really just don't. You're going into dangerous territory when you call out a particular girl as being "different" than the rest and "actually being the type you're into," especially coming from the frame of thinking like you "know better now." I had a very similar situation with a girl at work and it ended very badly. The fallout has been awful. If I could take back anything in my life it would probably be pursuing her, as coming to work is a lot…
/r/seduction27/05/16 10:22 PM
1

This is a great reply.
/r/seduction23/05/16 02:47 AM
3

You're really missing the point of my reply.
/r/seduction23/05/16 01:59 AM
2

Are you doing this to look cool or have better relationships with women? If you want to have sex with somebody, do it. If you don't, don't. It's really that simple. Stop trying to look cool and just do the things you want.
/r/seduction22/05/16 08:24 PM
1

I can relate to everything that you're saying, but honestly dude, you need to make correcting your negative self talk your number one priority. Anytime you catch yourself doing it you need to stop and forgive yourself. Nobody is going to accept you if you can't accept yourself. You don't have to be happy with failure, but you need to stop cutting yourself down. Let others do the rejecting. You're all you have, and you should be on your own team.
/r/seduction22/05/16 04:44 PM
2

I broke up with a girlfriend and found I had no social life. I went to an RSD Free tour, found a wing, and it was my life for the next two years. I would would have a daily approach or "time in the field" goal and I would journal about it all. I even had a weekly spreadsheet at one point to ensure I put the volume in. Looking back I don't see approaching as a very efficient way of meeting women, and I almost never cold approach nowadays. I also feel like after it enforces a really toxic mindset …
/r/seduction22/05/16 04:39 PM
1

That's great man. There's a huge stigma against getting professional help in this area and it's really cool to see you able to do it without judging. Seeing a therapist was very helpful for myself as I'm sure it will be for you as well.
/r/seduction22/05/16 04:32 PM
1

Push for sex now. At least make sure there's a romantic vibe between you, kiss, whatever. If you don't she will lose interest and somebody else is probably going to swoop on you.
/r/seduction21/05/16 10:49 PM
1

Have you ever thought to examine why you behave, think, and feel this way?
/r/seduction21/05/16 10:40 PM
1

Hey good to hear from you man. And no way, are you in Seattle? I bought the audio book on Audible, it was cool hearing him tell the story himself on my commutes to work. Heh yeah I never could commit cause I've made decent progress naturally, but I've considered doing a test only cycle for a few years, I don't know if I ever will. Did you jump straight into test and tren at the same time?
/r/seduction20/05/16 12:13 AM
1

It's great, he goes over his own crisis with this same issue. Feel free to PM if you want to bounce some ideas off eachother man. I know how you're feeling, although as much as I wanted to I didn't try the test and tren ;)
/r/seduction19/05/16 06:54 PM
1

I've had a similar crisis myself. Practicing game for about four years. More "game" than I ever thought I'd have. Still unhappy, still so dependent and obsessive when it comes to female validation. Take a break. Literally forbid yourself from hitting on girls. Focus on being truly by yourself. Try to curb the thoughts and habits of needing to approach and get that you've reinforced. I really recommend reading Neil Strauss' The Truth, as well as Brene Brown's Daring Greatly. They've been a huge h…
/r/seduction19/05/16 02:55 AM
2

Just be very intentional about not doing that behavior when you see yourself doing it. You're already aware of it. It's just like resisting the urge to eat a donut or whatever other temptation you have. You acknowledge it, and you intentionally choose to resist it.
/r/seduction18/05/16 04:27 PM
2

I feel you man, I struggled with this for awhile until I was on the other side enough to understand it. I'm sure you've been on dates too that you weren't feeling it but the girl was. Maybe you texted back and entertained the idea of meeting up, but when it came down to it you weren't invested enough to actually follow through. A lot of the time it's not you. Shit happens, people don't feel like it in the moment, maybe their in a bad mood, maybe something reminded them on their ex... Or there's …
/r/seduction18/05/16 04:25 PM
3

Dude you're over thinking this. NO GIRL who is genuinely into you is going to be wanting to meet up with you, read your text, think, "damn I liked this this guy but his strategy is shit. Who says 'what's up Stacy?' Fuck this guy no reply." If a girl is not interested NO texts will get her to meet up. That being said, be casual and set up another date when it's convenient. There's not some strategy that will "work." Girls are people with desires just like us and we simply need to align ourselves …
/r/seduction18/05/16 08:23 AM
1

Remind yourself we're all just people and while your problem might feel very real to you know a lot of it is in your head. I see guys ALL the time who are less good looking than me (I've put a LOT of time in the gym through various sports) have more success. A lot of the times we see what we want (or don't want) to see.
/r/seduction18/05/16 08:06 AM
1

Who knows. We don't know your life story. You might not really like this girl. You might be insecure about your number count. Maybe you have an ego about being a lady's man. Maybe you have intimacy problems and don't think anybody can truly love you so you'd rather sabotage it and fulfill that lack with casual sex.
/r/seduction17/05/16 02:23 AM
1

Basic stuff. Strong eye contact, sit closer with her, make intentional contact with her (wrap an arm briefly around her in a hug, put your hand on her leg, work up to this of course). You can even at some point explicitly state your interest and ask if you're reading the situation right, which in your situation would be good since she's a coworker.
/r/seduction16/05/16 11:42 PM
1

First of all, tread with caution. Not only is she your coworker, but these moves on her part are coming from a recent break with a SO. I would be very careful not to overinvest emotionally, especially with your level of experience. That being said, from what you've written here it seems like a good opportunity. She's already taken the initiative to make herself available to you, get physical, and invite you out. You just need to do your part. Ask her to get drinks, express your interest, make a …
/r/seduction16/05/16 01:03 PM
19

In my experience getting laid and making friends are two entirely different skillsets. Your problem most likely is that these girls see you ONLY as a friend, which is why they invite you to hangout and are comfortable talking about sex with you. It's not a bad thing and is really good, but the correct dynamic for a sexual relationship is not there. Tell me, with these girls you're referring to, would it make sense for you two to have sex if you were alone in a room together? Would she be surpris…
/r/seduction15/05/16 10:49 PM
1

You already get it so I won't say much. LMR as you've already stated isn't really a thing for advanced guys, but not because they're advanced. LMR mostly comes from trying to force sex in a situation where a girl's not ready/fully down. In the few times back in college when I got "LMR" the girl was just super insecure, and had nothing to do with my "game." In no way was it related to my shitty bed.
/r/seduction15/05/16 05:02 PM
1

First of all, stop reading Red Pill stuff. Second, read Models by Mark Manson and Daring Greatly by Brene Brown. You aren't going to get past this by a simple reddit post. It's going to require a lot of self-examination and challenging of your toxic beliefs.
/r/seduction13/05/16 04:38 PM
1

Exactly. It's all about the intent. In your example I don't really see much of a difference. The 2nd is a bit more vulnerable as it doesn't give you the option of pretending you didn't want to see her. Adding in the "I want to see you tonight" can be needy if you're saying it to pressure her to see you, or vulnerable if you're simply expressing your feelings. One is needy, the other is not.
/r/seduction13/05/16 04:37 PM
1

It literally just doesn't matter. Do you think no guy in a college dorm gets laid? Would you not sleep with a girl you're into because she has a small bed?
/r/seduction13/05/16 12:51 AM
4

This 100%. Also do you realize how many of these girls you're after do the exact same thing. minus the gym? The vast majority of the girls you meet probably just Netflix and hang out with friends. Most aren't doing crazy amazing things dancing, singing, or having any other random arbitrary skill.
/r/seduction13/05/16 12:49 AM
1

Vibe it out. I like to not pay because it doesn't create any expectations from the beginning. Think about it from a girl perspective, now she owes you something. Also don't do dinner dates with a bill like that. Harder to dodge. At the same time, I still do pay for girls I like. First time I try not to.
/r/seduction04/06/15 03:50 AM
9

Just to ask, I've felt this way before and sometimes feel like this myself do you think a life of "partying" and casual sex is what you want? Or is it what you think you SHOULD have? Do you think it will make you happy and feel better about yourself? I feel like understanding the difference between the two helps. If you don't mind me asking how old are you? And what do you want in your life? Like what do you REALLY want?
/r/seduction13/10/12 06:45 AM
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