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View 1 posts and 51 comments by No-Dream512 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
41

No-Dream512/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 09:24 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
3

Mid fifties here . To be honest I can't imagine starting again after 31 years together.
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/25 11:28 AM
2

31 years here. Yep weeks before she left we were on holiday and 3 months before that we were looking at houses to buy. She left everything with except my pension.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/25 08:14 PM
2

Well said!
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/25 08:12 PM
3

Because she is a selfish arsehole. Mine was the same as are 90% of the wives discussed here. I know it's hard but you will never understand why
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/25 08:10 PM
1

I'm in exactly the same position in my mid fifties. Pre 2019 I had a research position at a university. Post 2019 we decided on a lifestyle change. Nice to the coast, get a dog and cut down working hours. I was made redundant in 2019 so I started a little business from home so I could look after the dog and my wife kept working whilst I did all the homework stuff and researched our move.covid hit and my wife was shielding due to a long term health condition so I was looking after her, dog, runni…
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/25 07:09 AM
5

Anybody who says that they have an amazing sex life after 30 odd years together is full of shit imo.
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/25 01:21 PM
1

It's a slow process but I'll get there, as will you.
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/25 04:20 PM
2

Exactly the same here though I'm 7 months down the road and I'm mid fifties. I have a sister and a few friends who only care if it doesn't inconvenience them in any way. In 7 months none of them have visited me once but they say that I can visit them, when it's convenient for them that is. I have my dog and some people in my road have been great. Looking back, after the initial shock of her leaving i felt quite positive about the future but 2 months in I took one hell of a dive into depression w…
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/25 07:58 AM
0

Why is that ?
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/25 07:32 AM
6

It can drive you mad trying. I've been muttering " I don't f'ing believe it!" For the last 7 months whilst I walk the dog
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/25 02:50 PM
3

I was left with an anxious dog too though I'm in my mid fifties and married for 31 years. I will say that my dog , as anxious as she is, is a star when it comes to meeting people .
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/25 09:18 PM
4

The best you can do is really ignore her. I suspect she might not be as happy
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/25 08:32 PM
1

I find that when I think about her I remember the woman I married who was feminine, loving, attentive, funny and just amazing in every way and we were an amazing team. What I don't remember so clearly is the more recent version of this wife who was out virtually every night with her friends, cancelled our plans at the last minute, refused to show any interest in stuff I liked and if I dared to ask a question when she was getting ready then she would tell me to shut up. I think the brain does thi…
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/25 07:58 PM
9

I had a similar thing to yourself. 31 years looking after my wife though her surgeries and illness . Supporting her in everything she wanted to do. She just came home and announced she was leaving. No real reason why but she was absolutely ruthless. Within a day of leaving she left she effectively left me homeless, cancelled all of her share of the bills and filed for divorce with no interest in saving our marriage. I'm 7 months in and I just can't understand how someone who was so loving and ki…
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/25 05:48 PM
3

I had 4 people round and not only was it exhausting but I didn't the next day crying. 31:years together ( 7 months apart) and Halloween was always a big thing for us
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/25 08:30 AM
3

Mine left 7 months ago after 31 years together. I'm mid 50's. I associate with virtually every one of those points you list in your post and everyone I've spoken to about this has said much the same so it seems that you are totally normal like the rest of us. You are going through grief and it's going to take time to work through it. Obviously this first year you will have all the firsts like your birthday on your own, Christmas etc which will be tough. Unfortunately there are no shortcuts to ge…
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/25 07:41 AM
13

As a man it's always your fault
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/25 07:26 AM
9

31 years together and 21 married. I'm 7 months in now and those memories are becoming less painful everyday. I have a friend who is going through the exact same thing and being able to go through it together has been an amazing help. She has been there for me at every step as I've been for her. We message each other as soon as will wake up (usually at some ungodly hour) and we chat every day, take our dogs out together and cry together.
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/25 06:41 PM
6

Jeez I had to do a double take to check that it wasn't me that woke that. I did everything at home like you and did everything to support my wife in everything she did at my expense. I would cancel something I wanted to do so she could do her stuff. I stood by her through all her health issues and over the 31 years together I helped her to become the confident person she is now ( her words) . I took her parents to hospital appointments and turned down an amazing job because my wife was unwell. I…
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/25 08:18 AM
2

Feel free to put your thoughts on here. Download wysa and use it as an ai therapist but the best is to see a therapist in person
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/25 08:06 AM
6

Another woman who is a selfish arsehole. There is no shortage of them and you will look back and think that you've had a lucky escape. I went through much the same experience after 31 years together(21 married). Join any groups you can do you can meet new people and when people ask why you joined just say that you are giving through a divorce and are looking to make new friends. Believe in yourself. You will get through this!
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/25 08:04 AM
1

I don't know if you have a dog or not but if you do then next time you take the dog for a walk let the dog decide what way you go. I found that itv relaxed me. The dog? Total confusion 😂
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/25 08:42 AM
3

I don't think a lot of these woman knows themselves why.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 09:38 PM
3

You don't say your age but my my wife ( together 31 years) literally turned into a selfish arse hole when she left without warning at the age of 49. I'd go as far to say all communication with her after she left was as if the person I was talking too wasn't my wife but someone else. The change in personality was unbelievable. I'm 6 months on and I've never understood why and I don't think I ever will understand how someone can be so evil. However, I do feel much better now than I did six months …
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 01:55 PM
8

It amazes me that so many woman would throw everything away for a new relationship that is probably going to end in failure. An old boy once said to me that the problem with people today is that they expect too much.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 06:59 AM
1

I'll be honest that after 31 years I can't even remember what it was like before 😂. Now being in my mid fifties I was on a gradual wind down and didn't my time walking the dog, napping, gardening and trips out with my significant other
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 06:56 AM
6

I second all of this. 31:years of looking after her with Crohn's disease and supporting her in everything she did. I gave up my career to look after her and ran round taking her parents to hospital too. She left in 5 minutes and Blame's me for everything. The way you looked after her is not a weakness. It shows that you are a good person.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 05:48 AM
4

Try going to church and when you feel up to it , maybe volunteering at the church. You don't have to be religious and most people start going to church when they have a traumatic life event. In the UK the NHS runs a social prescriber team when you can visit them and tell them what's happened and a bit about yourself and they will put you in touch with local events and activities that would be suitable for you.
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/25 08:25 PM
5

I don't have any children but when my wife first left I was so terrified of ending up alone that I would wake up with raging anxiety and go into a full on panic attack. 6 months on and the feelings have subsided a lot. I've no solution but the feelings will fade over time
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/25 12:42 PM
23

The day of my marriage my dad said to me , " it's not too late to change your mind". I swear when I last visited my dad's grave I heard him say" I told you so".
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 08:18 PM
5

I'm going to print these out and stick them on the fridge
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 07:30 PM
2

Did she do a good job though?
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 02:01 PM
2

Yeh looking back you can see how this person didn't really give a shit about anyone but themselves.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 01:45 PM
7

That being discarded feeling is a real blow. when I look back over the last 30 odd years and think about the things I did for her and the sacrifices I made for us it makes me feel sick as to how she could do this to me
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 01:11 PM
1

Even the bloody weather🤦‍♂️
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 11:20 AM
12

That is exactly what my wife did after all her old friends left their husbands one by one. Then she got involved with a load more older divorced women and that was it. She came home one day and announced that her future wasn't worth me but in burlesque dancing 🤦‍♂️. 31 years down the shitter.
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 06:21 AM
1

Please try. You'll feel much better for it
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/25 06:20 PM
3

This is who you are. It is not something that is wrong with you.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/25 06:18 PM
3

Some good points. I'd also add that your brain does this thing where it only remembers the good points about your previous partner. For example, my brain never reminded me of the time my wife refused to even look at a big project I had been working on. When She refused to play pinball with me on my birthday and all the times when we arranged to do something and then she did something else at the last minute. When she refused to go to see my family at Christmas and then got arsey when I didn't wa…
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/25 01:27 PM
21

I understand what you are saying but I think you are being far too hard on yourself. No one celebrates their 10 th anniversary like their first and no married couple is having sex as often as they did as when they first met and no 20 year old celebrates Christmas like when they were 5 either. This sort of nonsense is propagated in the media to make people feel iinadequate and spend more money. it was your wife that threw everything away and like all other women she blames you. As for this codepe…
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/25 09:50 AM
3

I don't think I did. My wife supported me through my PhD and I got a special version of it printed thanking her for her support. When sorting out her stuff she asked if I wanted it. I said that it was a present for her. " Oh I'll chuck it in the bin then" she said. Good on you for sticking with your career. I gave up mine for her and she did nothing of the sort for me
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/25 07:43 AM
3

My married friends said that if it had happened to them they would just concentrate on their hobbies. They then go on to say that they are happily married . I say that's what I thought in the split second before she opened her mouth and said she was throwing it all away.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/25 06:14 AM
4

This. Stay calm throughout the whole process. If she wants to be an arsehole then let her. When her solicitor tries to shit stir just let it pass. File for divorce as quickly as possible!
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/25 05:56 AM
10

I don't have kids but I do have the dog to look after and the ex sometimes comes to take the dog out. Not ideal but I'm keeping every thing calm until the divorce is sorted. Then she can get lost for all I care. I just can't believe how I stuck by her through all her surgeries, when she was told she couldn't have children and I even turned down a university teaching job in the u.s because health insurance for her would have cost £5000 a month!. This move effectively ended my scientific research …
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 03:52 PM
3

What a great brother you have ! Being somewhere new will be a great help in speeding your recovery for sure.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 03:35 PM
3

Yeh the team thing. We always said that to each other. Your story sounds very Similar to mine. Though my wife started teaching her own dance classes and also did amature dramatics whilst I did everything at home, fixed her car, made her dinner and walked the dog . I even took her parents to hospital appointments FFS🤦‍♂️. I had a look at that app. Thanks.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 02:09 PM
1

This is exactly right and sadly not what the majority of blokes do. Instead they meet someone and disregard all of their own friends and hobbies to spend every moment with their girlfriend.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 12:26 PM
1

I've been waiting for a therapy appointment via the NHS ( much cheaper £15) since June and they reckon it won't be until well into the new year🤦‍♂️. I think I'm going to have to suck it up and pay the full price
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 11:17 AM
3

I'm a little bit further ahead in the process than you and I don't think they're are any shortcuts regarding stopping rumination. It just fades over time though in my case it's been up and down over time. Months 3 and 4 were the worst for me and I was very close to ending it all. Luckily, I got in touch with an old friend whose husband had left her. We have supported each other since then. Without her I probably wouldnt be here now. If you can , move in with a friend or family member. Being on y…
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 11:13 AM
1

Also, At my age, 54 , I will never be able to have the same connection ( we were together 31 years) with anyone ever again. It's a bit sad
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 10:46 AM
1

My dad and I owned a house together before I was married. Upon his passing the house was 100% owned by Me and I sold it in 2022 and kept the money in my own name. My wife walked out this year after 21 years of marriage and according to my solicitor ( I'm in the UK), if your marriage is considered a long marriage then inheritances are split 50/50. My wife said that she isn't interested in the money but if she dies take it then I hope my dad haunts her for the rest of her life.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/25 10:32 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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