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RedWings1981 Archive

View 1 post and 17 comments by RedWings1981 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
3

RedWings1981/r/Divorce_Men22/07/25 10:15 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
7

How do people do it? I’m 3 years out and it still is unbearable daily pain. I miss every part of my old life with my 4 kids as a family. My ex has an enormous family and extended family in the area we live in. I was part of their family for 22 years because I moved for her. My blood family is a plane ride away so I’m all alone. I have friends but it’s just not the same. I kinda feel like a kid who was adopted by my in laws when I was 19 and then sent back to the orphanage in a way. It hurts so m…
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/26 12:48 AM
1

Try Trazadone. Not habit forming and doesn’t mess with your sleep architecture. Was a miracle for me when I was in a really bad place.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/26 08:11 PM
8

Reading your story brought back so many flashbacks. Man, I am sorry you are going through the mental anguish. I know the turmoil you are in right now and the guys on this sub have helped me a lot. Very similar stories we all seem to have. I’m was actually shocked and sobered to hear so many guys go through basically the same thing. Knowing that my story wasn’t unique kinda helped in a weird way. Sending you support whenever you need it. What I’ll never understand is why women just can’t wait a p…
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/26 03:41 AM
1

Thanks. There is a part of me that will always hold out hope that things will get better. That this hell will not continue indefinitely. That we go through it for a reason and life will get better. I just want to find one ray of sunshine, one piece of momentum. I haven’t had that in awhile. I was there about 1.5 years ago after getting through the absolute worst of the divorce. Managed to land a huge new job with bigger title and large increase in salary. It lasted only a year. When they let me …
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/26 05:31 PM
2

Same. Living in VHCOL area and ex is generationally wealthy from parents and grandparents. Flys private sometimes kind of wealth. I now live in apartment, recently lost my job and just absolutely spiraling mentally. She still comes after me for every little expense. I’m so tired and beaten down by this sometimes I want to just stop all the pain. Most day my brain literally physically hurts from all the stress. She does not have a care in the world and I hate myself even more for being in this po…
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/26 04:59 PM
3

I have two twin daughters. Reading the above made me start to cry. I’m in the same boat as you and hopefully there is still some time for me to save. I feel for you brother. I truly do. Ex wife didn’t care how much money she wasted on lawyers in the divorce. Money could have gone to their college funds
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/26 04:19 AM
2

Let me guess…when you found out about the other relationship after she told you she wanted to separate she said something along the lines of “I made the decision to separate a long time ago, so it’s not cheating” They literally convince themselves and their girlfriends they can do no wrong as long as they “made the decision beforehand”.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/26 01:34 AM
15

Weird part for me was that felt like I could trust her with my life up until the very end. But when the monkey branching occurs and they move on…holy shit they become an entirely different person. The hardest part for my brain to comprehend is how someone can just flip the switch after 22 years together and now treat you like an enemy that needs to have their life destroyed, ripped apart and left for dead. I just don’t get it nor will I ever understand it. I’d never do some of the things she did…
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/26 10:04 PM
6

Hopefully she doesn’t have siblings or parents that tell you to “stop playing the victim” when you try to express how devastated and heartbroken you are for having your family ripped apart. Or to “act rationally” when you get angry at her BS custody proposal. There is pure evil in this world. Never knew how devious human beings could be.
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/26 08:20 PM
2

Same exact feelings and process OP. Thanks for posting to get me out of a sad day today. It helps knowing soooo many of these follow the same storyline / trajectory. I’m curious though…has anyone ever encountered an ex that actually apologized a few years later? Like did they finally show just an ounce of humanity after whatever crisis they were going through receded? I’m not looking for anything like a reconciliation apology. More just like “hey, I’m really sorry I completely destroyed our fami…
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/26 05:30 PM
1

Feel you on this so much. The ups and downs are getting really tiresome. But the bad times aren’t lasting for prolonged periods of time (month) like the used to. Hopefully that’s a good sign? I’ve noticed that when I have a routine, go to the gym, and stay busy it’s usually better. The down times are a killer. Just want to be able to shut my brain off sometimes and not think
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/25 09:58 PM
6

Eh, you are being too hard on yourself. Good for you for at least trying. It’s a scary thing to do to put yourself out there again after so long. Sending you a high five
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/25 02:38 AM
6

Absolutely nothing you said sounds self indulgent. It just sounds raw and honest. I’m sorry you are going through this. I’ve been going through what you describe for almost 3 years now. It used to be a daily occurrence for me. Never thought I would find relief. It still comes in waves from time to time, but more like once a week or every two weeks. It gets somewhat more manageable with time, but I don’t think it ever fully goes away. Here for you brother if you need to vent or cry. There isn’t w…
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/25 08:09 PM
11

Jesus Christ this!! My ex came from an enormous family with a lot of wealth. I tried to hint that “her family” was me and the kids, but I always kinda felt like an outsider because to her, “her family” only meant blood relation. Her parents, siblings, aunts and uncles. I once heard “the family you create is more important than the family you came from” but this did not apply with her.
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/25 06:58 PM
13

This needs to be spread far and wide. People that have never gone through a divorce truly don’t understand the absolute hell it is on a daily basis. How it fucks with your mind and body and sometimes suicide does seem like the only relief. If you have a friend that is going through it, please check on them. You don’t have to come up with the correct words to say, but just being physically present with someone and listening to them makes a world of difference.
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/25 06:35 PM
2

I’m incredibly well said. This is exactly how my brain feels. Some days, existing just doesn’t quite make sense…how the fuck is this my new reality?? I have literally felt my brain fragment too. I don’t wish that on anyone but in a weird way it is reassuring to hear that it’s not unique to me
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/25 11:10 PM
2

Appreciate it. I’ve definitely been so depressed that the bad bad thoughts have entered my head. I miss my kids so much on the days I don’t have them and I miss just doing things as a family. We had a up and down marriage and didn’t communicate well at all. But somehow the good times always got us through. Until she I guess had enough “wanted a chance at happiness” and apparently thought reconnecting with ex boyfriend from high school was the path to that happiness. I can’t explain it, but the d…
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/25 11:04 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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