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Reject444 Archive

View 6 posts and 281 comments by Reject444 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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6

If you think it would be fun and you WANT to do the shoot for YOU, then I say go for it. If you’re doing it expecting her to put out or you’re doing it for anything you hope she might do, that’s a covert contract and you should definitely not do it for that. Like, I think I’d do it because it’s been a while since I’ve done that kind of shoot and I’d look at it as good fun practice, but I wouldn’t be doing it in the hopes that I’d get anything physical from the girl. But you know how you feel abo…
/r/TheRedPill27/02/22 02:55 AM
7

I remember your story and it sucks that you had to go through all of that, but I’m glad that it seems like you’ve come out of it into a good and healthy place. Thanks for sharing your experience and reminding us of these fundamentals. All the best, man.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/01/22 06:16 PM
2

“I don’t think she gets that you can be an asshole some times.” [exaggeratedly faking offense] Hey! That’s not true! [cocky grin] I can be an asshole ALL the time!
/r/MarriedRedPill18/09/21 12:03 AM
7

So you won’t even talk to girls because you have a gf? Are you Mike Pence?
/r/seduction15/07/21 06:54 PM
2

Sure I do, it’s just making it difficult right now during the temporary tough times. When things get more normal again I think I should be okay, but it would be nice to find a friend or two in the meantime as well so I don’t have to wait that long.
/r/TheRedPill30/01/21 09:05 PM
5

I totally agree with this, but sometimes can be easier said than done. I’m in my early 40s and just moved basically across the country for a new job I got after losing my last one due to COVID-19 shutdowns. I’d love to get out and meet some new people here but nothings really happening (sports leagues and other stuff I’d usually join to meet people just aren’t available) due to winter and/or coronavirus, and I find it’s harder than normal to randomly strike up conversations at the grocery store …
/r/TheRedPill30/01/21 07:29 PM
5

I’m not telling you that you NEED to move to a new place or anything. What I’m getting at is that a lot of guys stifle themselves and neuter their dreams because of their wife’s job, or her preferences, or because of the duties to provide food for their kids. A dad taking care of children can’t throw caution to the wind and try to start his own business because if he loses everything his kids will suffer. When you’re not tied down by any family obligations you can take whatever risks you want be…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/20 11:04 PM
21

Dude, that is some heavy shit. I can’t imagine how difficult it must have been to make the choice to take your son off of life support. FWIW from an internet stranger, it sounds like you did the right thing, but I can fully understand how that could make you feel like shit for a while. It sounds like you’re much better off without your ex-wife in your life, though. I think you need to allow yourself some time to grieve and acknowledge that you’ve been dealt a shitty hand, and at first your purpo…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/20 06:21 PM
6

This is a really excellent and insightful way of breaking things down. Thanks for the kick in the ass.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/03/20 02:13 PM
2

SITUATION: I can’t believe how much I’ve let myself slip on posting here. Forcing myself to get back on it, in an MRP reboot for me. Me-- 41, 5’10”, 170 lbs. Wife--41, married 20+ years; we have both been each other’s only sexual partner (that I know of). Two kids, one 3 years old and one early elementary school aged. MISSION: I’m going back to the drawing board here. Upon reading several recommendations for it recently, I just ordered The Unchained Man, and will read it and then craft a new Mis…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/02/20 11:01 PM
6

JFC, some of you guys are thick. I'm still an idiot faggot who sucks at this and hasn't made nearly as much progress as I should have but it's been so clear to me from the beginning what so many of you seem to completely miss: Being "Red Pill" or "Alpha" does NOT mean "be an uncaring, emotionless asshole." Being a man of high value doesn't mean ignoring your wife, being a jerk to her, or disregarding her feelings and needs. This goes DOUBLE when she is pregnant. You need to offer comfort, suppor…
/r/askMRP24/02/20 07:03 PM
10

Wait, you think your wife asking you to bring her a diaper for your kid is a shit test? Are you sure you’ve done the MRP reading? You don’t say she was bitchy about it or that she criticized you or anything. You’re a dad, just help take care of your kid and take her a damn diaper if she needs one. Not every request a woman makes is a shit test.
/r/askMRP14/02/20 08:10 PM
3

This is hilarious!
/r/MarriedRedPill08/02/20 09:29 PM
14

Thanks for the update man. It seems like you have handled this in about as solid a manner as possible. Keep progressing and improving. I’m interested to see where your story goes from here.
/r/askMRP07/01/20 01:54 PM
6

Reading the first 80% of this OP, I was absolutely convinced that this was a troll post. After reading the whole thing and checking OP’s post history, I’m seeing a chance that this is real, but I’m still skeptical. OP, I agree with others here that it sounds to me like this girl was DTF, but you likely did something to kill the vibe during your interaction. Her “friendzoning” you could have been a shit test, which you could have passed by being totally OI about the whole thing. You sound like yo…
/r/askMRP10/11/19 01:55 PM
1

5’10”, 170 lbs., ~18% BF (estimating), married 22 years, 2 kids Physical: My current lifts are: BP 130, OHP 80, Squat 145, DL 205. I'm back in the gym 6 times per week now, 4 lifting sessions and 2 HIIT cardio. I've let myself get frustrated with my slow progress and that has lessened my motivation and commitment; I can't let that happen anymore. I've been fighting though a reasonably serious injury and an illness over the past few months, but there are no more excuses and I need to keep making …
/r/MarriedRedPill05/11/19 11:26 PM
1

I’m struggling with applying dread which tells me I’m trying to overtly create it. You don't "apply" Dread. It's a natural byproduct of you becoming a kick-ass man. If you're affirmatively working to make "Dread" happen, it's not happening; Dread happens naturally when you are an awesome guy living an awesome life (with or without her).
/r/MarriedRedPill05/11/19 08:28 PM
2

Dude, this one is easy. If you don't want to get married, don't get married. If you do want to get married, even knowing everything that you learn from MRP, but you worried about the financial/legal ramifications, just get a prenup. Decide what YOU want, and then make THAT happen. Quit being insecure--it sounds to me like you actually didn't find anything worrisome on her laptop at all--no evidence of cheating (on you or any previous committed partners), and no sign of disrespecting you in other…
/r/askMRP04/11/19 09:57 PM
1

Not for a year. Then the total T was fairly low (368) but my Free T seemed decent (11.6). Need to get this done again.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/10/19 01:04 PM
1

Thanks. I actually feel like I have a really good handle on control of my weight, just not my stomach fat. Just so you don’t need to get read my post history, I started out last year at 188 lbs. of out-of-shape, zero muscle., skinny fat weakling. I’ve cut down to around 155 twice since but bulked up to try to gain some size. I’m very dialed in on my TDEE and my macro tracking, and I can cut or bulk to a desired weight in the 155-180 range pretty easily with enough time. I also do IF every day (1…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/10/19 02:16 AM
1

Social: groom and dress yourself appropriately and well Pass. One of my stronger areas. organize and host an event or party Pass, though I don’t have the opportunities to do this as much as I would like. make small talk; introduce yourself and work a room Mostly pass. I can do this, but sometimes don’t like to. Sometimes small talk bores or annoys me. build and maintain a circle of male friends I’m going to say Fail on this one. I have some male friends, but not enough, and they are separate fri…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/10/19 10:41 PM
1

5’10”, 170 lbs., ~18% BF (estimating), married 22 years, 2 kids (8 and 2) It’s been too long since I posted here. Partly because I’ve been extremely busy and partly because I have just kinda felt like I was treading water lately and not really making any progress or having anything to report. But I was really inspired by u/man_in_the_world’s recent “Manning 101” post, which served to me as a solid roadmap and checklist, and I wanted to take stock of where I am in these fundamentals—if I’m failin…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/10/19 10:41 PM
1

OP, this is the right answer. Do stuff for YOU, not her; she can come along if she wants (and you choose to invite her). "I'm planning to go to Movie X on Friday night, should I get you a ticket?" is much better "leading" in this situation. Far less needy and more in your frame than what you said. This is pretty basic MRP stuff.
/r/askMRP08/07/19 09:37 PM
13

We all shit on the “Happy wife, happy life” advice, but the thing is, it’s not wrong—it’s just that the things society had conditioned us to believe we need to do to make her “happy”—being a submissive beta wimp, catering to her every whim—actually make both husband and wife miserable instead of happy. Making yourself a better man and captain with a demonstrably unshakeable frame that she knows she can be safe in is the way to make a wife TRULY happy, and if you do that you CAN have a happy life…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/06/19 01:35 PM
1

Holy shit, this is EXACTLY the reminder I needed right now. Not about the Main Event, but for everything leading up to it. Thanks for the great post and the kick in the ass.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/06/19 02:12 AM
2

Thanks for your response; as always, I appreciate your guidance. ​ Fundamental changes take time to internalize. It also takes time to find your own style or version that best fits with your personality; don't be afraid to experiment and adapt the principles to your own style. ​ I know all of this deep down; in fact one big focus I've had is to avoid going Rambo and being centered and measured with everything MRP, looking at it as a marathon, not a sprint. I'm just finding it difficult lately no…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/06/19 06:28 PM
1

OYS #17 SITUATION: Me-- 40, 5’10”, 164 lbs., ~18% bodyfat. Lifts are weak—Bench 130, OHP 100, Squat 140, DL 225. Wife--40, married 20+ years; we have both been each other’s only sexual partner (that I know of). Two kids, one 2 years old and one early elementary school aged. MISSION: Regain and maintain my passion for living an awesome life; be emotionally self-sufficient (rely only on myself for validation, support, and judgment). READING: Currently working through the 48 Laws of Power; somehow …
/r/MarriedRedPill18/06/19 09:53 PM
3

I considered not making a new account, but I hate the idea that I could potently be watering down my future posts because she’d be reading them. There's really trouble either way, I'm afraid. Now that she knows you're on here and has read all of your posts, even if you started from a new username that she didn't know, she could probably figure out it was you based on reading all of the MRP postings from new accounts and matching the details. If my wife ever stumbled onto this subforum and read t…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/06/19 05:01 PM
1

OYS #16 SITUATION: Me-- 40, 5’10”, 164 lbs., ~18% bodyfat. Lifts are weak—Bench 130, OHP 100, Squat 140, DL 225. Wife--40, married 20+ years; we have both been each other’s only sexual partner (that I know of). Two kids, one 2 years old and one early elementary school aged. MISSION: Regain and maintain my passion for living an awesome life; be emotionally self-sufficient (rely only on myself for validation, support, and judgment). PHYSICAL: I’m eating around 300-400 daily calories above my TDEE.…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/06/19 10:39 PM
3

Yeah man, this is crazy shit, way beyond normal “shit testing.” I agree with others here that this situation sounds dangerous for you, and you need to take serious steps to protect yourself. Just following MRP alone might not be enough to get you out of this bad situation.
/r/askMRP09/06/19 12:48 PM
1

I guess I get what you're saying, but I'm not sure I totally see what I'm negotiating here. I've reached a point where I've realized that, whether I'm attractive or not, my wife has some serious issues and hangups around sex that likely prevent HER from having a long-term great sex life even with the hawtest of Chads. I'm continuing to work on improving myself for me, and whether she responds to that or not is her choice. But I feel it's part of my duty as the leader of my relationship to encour…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/06/19 09:03 PM
8

Good for you, man, if this has helped you and is making you happy. We've discussed this before, and as you know, I have also been a Mormon from the time when I was born. In a way, I never fully bought in--I appreciate the church and its teachings for the value it brings into my life, but I'm realistic (I think) about what that value is and where my boundaries are with it. I didn't go on a mission (sacrifice 2 years of my life in some third-world shithole? No thanks). I don't pay tithing. I don't…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/06/19 05:32 PM
1

step off the starfsh and say nothing. when she ask, don't make a speech . . . just state your not interested in starfish and then be gone doing something else. ​ There are two main issues I struggle with in following this advice. First, if I'm initiating and she accepts, she makes it pretty clear up front whether it's going to be starfish or not. If she's going to starfish, she basically accepts my advances by offering starfish. It means she's not in the mood but will accommodate me to keep me h…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/06/19 05:08 PM
0

OYS #15 SITUATION: Me-- 40, 5’10”, 162 lbs., ~18% bodyfat (fuck what the Omron says, I’m being realistic here). Wife--40, married 20+ years; we have both been each other’s only sexual partner (that I know of). Two kids, one 2 years old and one early elementary school aged. MISSION: Return to being the awesome, successful MAN with huge potential I was before I got married; be emotionally self-sufficient (rely only on myself for validation, support, and judgment). PHYSICAL: I’m really liking my ne…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/19 10:23 PM
1

The toughest guy I know, who also had extensive martial arts training, got stomped half to death by a bunch of 15 year olds in broad daylight while his neighbors looked on. Dude, the best fighter in the world is gonna lose to a bunch of teenagers if he is severely outnumbered. Even a weapon might not help much against 20 other people who want to mess you up. That's why gangs and mobs are so frightening--if they decide they want to hurt you, it's probably going to happen no matter who you are or …
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/19 05:52 PM
2

How does something like Muay Thai or BJJ, or even yoga, affect your lifting schedule? Like, if I lift on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday mornings, is doing a Muay Thai class on Monday night going to tire me out and make my Tuesday workout shittier? Or if I destroyed my chest with heavy bench pressing that morning, am I going to suck at BJJ that night? Any advice on good scheduling practices for this?
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/19 05:44 PM
2

My wife doesn't get angry at ME very often (hardly ever), but she's often pissed off or complaining about other stuff that puts her in a bad mood--something the kids have done, or some plan she had for her day that didn't work out, or something minor that happened to one of her family members (who all live on the other side of the country from us). I bear the brunt of this one way or another--again, she doesn't usually take it out on me directly but it puts her in a bad mood and makes her surly …
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/19 05:38 PM
2

I just finished “Resurrecting Sex” by Schnarch and I found it more helpful (and a better read) than “Passionate Marriage”. I’m aware that it may have seemed more accessible because I was already familiar with many of the basic concepts because I had previously read Passionate Marriage, though. Either way, I think RS is definitely worth a read-through or two.
/r/askMRP30/05/19 03:11 AM
1

So I had my T levels checked (along with everything else) last summer, and they're definitely on the low end. Serum Test was 368 ng/dL (Ref. Range 264-916) and Free Test was 11.6 pg/mL (Ref. Range 6.8-21.5). My doctor didn't seem concerned and was very reluctant to discuss TRT. I've been doing tons of research and trying many non-TRT methods for hopeful T-level improvement (mostly lifting and various supplements, including Vitamin D/K2, Tribulus, Fenugreek, DAA, etc.). I'm due for another physic…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/05/19 04:29 PM
1

Thanks man. I do think you're on to something; I find it hard to engage the emotional sometimes because my wife and I know each other so well and there are so many logistical and factual things to discuss and take care of. I used to be a pretty emotional guy (in the good sense, I think; not like a whiny bitch or anything) with a lot of passion for life in general and I think the years of corporate grind plus repeated sexual rejection from my wife dulled a lot of that in me. I've been looking for…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/05/19 08:29 PM
1

The BF% thing is weird. I feel relatively lean almost everywhere, and I'm at my lightest weight in decades, but I've still got an unsightly amount of flab on my stomach. It's not HUGE, but it is noticeable, and it looks particularly bad because it's so disproportionate to the rest of my body now. So even if the 12% is correct (and who knows, really, how accurate my monitor is), my aesthetic results aren't as good as I'd expect at that BF%. I would feel a lot better if I could get rid of this fla…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/05/19 08:20 PM
1

Even I hate to see my other lifts. They suck and I’m still weak. I have followed my programs diligently but something isn’t working, hence the move to this new program in an effort to make progress that has so far eluded me. My sleep is one problem—with my work schedule and family responsibilities it’s nearly impossible for me to get more than 5-6 hours per night and still have time to go to the gym, so that could be one thing that is holding me back but there is no easy solution. Perhaps it’s t…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/19 11:09 PM
1

(Continued from above, 2 of 2) RELATIONSHIP: Despite what I see as progress in my mental and (to a lesser but still noticeable degree) physical states, sex still sucks in both quantity and quality. I think we have averaged sex about 2-3 times/month since November (I can’t remember before that), which may overall be the lowest frequency over a six-month period in our entire marriage. And when we do have sex, my wife is still so limited in both the activities and reactions she will allow of hersel…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/19 09:43 PM
1

OYS #14 I haven’t checked in for a while because I’ve been sorting out and clarifying a bunch of this stuff in my own head, and have also been absolutely swamped with work and family stuff. I’ve been working my MRP journey for over a year now. I still have a lot of shit to own, starting with the fact that I don’t post in OYS nearly often enough. I must do better, if for nothing else than to help hold myself accountable. SITUATION: Me-- 40, 5’10”, 159 lbs., ~12% bodyfat (Omron BF Sensor). Wife--4…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/19 09:42 PM
2

Children with dynamite...
/r/askMRP30/04/19 07:31 PM
5

This was one of the most insightful and instructive posts I've read (for me) in a while here. Very helpful for me right now, but will take some time for me to fully digest and reflect on. Thanks.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/04/19 10:49 PM
72

Tell her you need photos of her landing strip so you know where you're taking this thing.
/r/seduction21/03/19 06:08 PM
1

I think it's all about your frame, rather than any specific behaviors per se. If you're showing her love from a place of insecurity and oneitis, or as part of a covert contract ("if I get her some nice jewelry, she'll have sex with me!"), you're being a beta and doing it wrong. But a strong, secure man with solid frame can still do nice things for his woman to make her happy and feel good, because that's what the man wants to do. Being "Alpha" doesn't mean being a standoffish jerk all the time o…
/r/askMRP07/02/19 09:26 PM
3

I think you might be missing something here. As I see it, removing time and attention isn't for normal "bad moods" or low energy days; for those things, YOU are the Captain and YOU set the tone and use your positive masculine energy to bolster her up and bring her out into a happy place again. Bad moods and low energy aren't something you should be looking to "punish" her for anyway; if she's in a bad mood it's your job to help her get over it by sharing your awesomeness with her. You only withd…
/r/askMRP07/02/19 08:18 PM
1

Intentionally hiding assets from a divorce is very difficult and likely illegal, at least in most of the United States. Not sure I'd recommend the strategy you seem to be pursuing here. Better to do what you can to minimize likelihood of divorce and consult a good divorce lawyer to find (legal) strategies to help minimize losses if the worst does happen. Trying to find way to "hide" assets is likely a counterproductive waste of your time and effort.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/02/19 10:19 PM
3

I don't like thongs nor string bikinis. They lose there sexiness. But here is where I differ from you. I know it is a preference of mine, you made it a boundary. Did he, though? It sounds to me like OP's girl asked if he was okay with her getting a revealing swimsuit, and he "told her. You can wear what you want but revealing clothing in public doesn’t turn me [on]." Isn't that just making his preference clear? If he's issuing ultimatums or telling her she can't buy what she wants, that's one th…
/r/askMRP06/02/19 08:51 PM
1

OYS #13 Stats: 46, married 20+ years, 2 young kids, 5'10", 164 lbs., 11% BF (Omron) Lifting Working Weights (still suck): Incline Bench 115, DL 235, OHP 85, Squat 155 December and January were a bit tough for me; not sure if it was the cold, the holidays, the various illnesses running through my family, or me just being a distracted loser, but I missed a bunch of gym days (even a couple of full weeks) and also haven't been visiting/posting here as regularly. Part of it stemmed from my frustratio…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/02/19 10:28 PM
2

Dude, you talk about “the Dread” being “good” about this girl at work while demonstrating that you really don’t know what Dread is or how to use it, and that you’re not at a point where Dread even means anything yet. You’re failing (and showing ignorance of) the most basic MRP fundamentals. Like, she tells you after rough fucking that she feels like a whore? That’s a comfort test. She’s telling you you’re a loser who’s not doing enough in your life? Either she’s right or it’s a basic shit test. …
/r/askMRP04/02/19 02:04 PM
1

I don’t KNOW at all yet; I’m making an educated guess from what I know about her basic personality. She’s not given to competitiveness in anything. Partly because she has low self-esteem. It is possible that she would react in an unexpected way but I’m guessing how she will react to Dread from 20+ years of experience with her.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/01/19 03:55 PM
1

Hard to say; I’m just transitioning into DL 4 and have mostly been working in DL 3, making an awesome life. So far withdrawals of time and attention haven’t had much effect, but like I said it’s still early. I definitely haven’t flirted with other women in my wife’s presence or anything so far. If Dread does work on her, my guess is that it will be from fear of losing me rather than any sense of competing with other women.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/12/18 10:42 PM
1

So gonna throw this question out there and hopefully not get a typical “if Chad was fucking her...” response lol. She basically requires clit stimulation during sex, like she says it’s painful if her clit isn’t getting some attention. Could this be from a lack of attraction or are some woman just like that? I know this appears validation seeking but I’m more curious cus as long as I’ve know her, 15+ years, we’ve never fucked without her clit being rubbed. Have you tried one of those vibrating co…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/12/18 08:26 PM
5

You come to bed after a long day, shortly after your wife. You find yourself incredibly horny, so you initiate sex. Your wife says "Honey, I had a long and difficult day, and I'm totally exhausted. I don't want an orgasm, I'm not up for giving you a blowjob or handjob or riding you or even moving ... but I would enjoy just lying here passively and letting you take your pleasure with my body." Thanks for another insightful post; I learn a lot from reading your stuff. I get your point, and I'm oft…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/12/18 08:21 PM
5

I found this FR interesting but completely foreign to my relationship, not just because I’m still more than a year behind OP in building my SMV and frame, but because my wife just doesn’t think this way. She’s literally the least competitive person I’ve ever met. When we play games she absolutely does not care if she wins or loses. I don’t see her ever doing this kind of thing in order to compete or win over other women. But I’m interested to read more about how this develops for you, OP.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/12/18 10:44 PM
5

I get the general consensus is withdrawal but that’s arguably punishment also. I think I’m just not getting to nuances of some of these words. Is it more indirect punishment? Indirect being withdrawal. Than overt? Overt being stated ultimatum of “I’m not talking for 2 days” No, it's not "punishment," it's removal of a reward. You're not thinking of yourself as The Prize. If you're the awesome Captain she needs in her life, then you choosing to give her your time and attention is her reward for "…
/r/askMRP28/12/18 10:07 PM
1

Yeah, that's really what I'm getting at here. If I need or really want something, I buy it for myself. So for my wife to get me Christmas gifts that I don't already have, she's spending money on things that are basically superfluous (because if I really needed or wanted them, I would have them already). She usually gets me things that I do like, but would generally have been just as happy not having. But it does make her happy to give me those gifts, so there is some benefit that. None of this e…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/12/18 03:54 PM
2

(Continued; Part 2 of 2) RELATIONSHIP: We only had sex twice in November, and so far twice in December. It’s a busy time of year, but that only goes so far. During November I did not initiate at all—sex twice. In December, I have initiated at least several times per week—sex twice. Not totally sure what to make of this except that it seems that whether I initiate or not may make little difference—it’s still always happening according to my wife’s “schedule” and wants. It’s a small sample size, b…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/12/18 09:52 PM
1

OYS #12 SITUATION: Me-- 40, 5’10”, 163 lbs., ~12% bodyfat (Omron BF Sensor). Wife--40, married 20+ years; we have both been each other’s only sexual partner (that I know of). Two kids, one 2 years old and one early elementary school aged. READING: Have read MMSLP x2, NMMNG, WISNIFG, Book of Pook, Saving a Low Sex Marriage x2, MAP x2, The Rational Male (Year One), Models, Practical Female Psychology, Bang, Day Bang, Sex God Method, Way of the Superior Man, Ironwood Collection of Alpha Moves, The …
/r/MarriedRedPill27/12/18 09:52 PM
1

She's probably dry and bored as hell with your weak-ass, tentative initiations. "Go big or go home." Dominance; Emotion; Variety. You're right, though while I understand this in theory, I have trouble putting it into practice. Part of the problem is that this is the way initiation has ALWAYS happened with us, so I never really learned how to do it any other way. Are there any resources you could point me to as a practical guide with steps or examples to use? MMSLP has some of this but most of th…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/12/18 09:17 PM
2

when you have a much higher female to male ratio such as happened with early Latter day saints when a bunch of the men were killed by mobs. Or later died trying to get to and settle much of the Mountain West.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/12/18 06:03 PM
4

This presents a bit of a quandary for Peter Priesthood, because: (1) he's only going to use passive dread; and (2) his wife knows passive dread is nothing more than an idle threat to her CK ticket. This is another challenge redpilled mormons face that might not be typical of the group at large. Yeah, I was thinking about this same idea late last night. My hope is that Passive Dread works on more of an instinctive/subconscious level such that stuff like preselection and seeing other women finding…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/12/18 05:13 PM
1

Yeah, there’s no ideal solution, but at least now each of you know that no matter what you’ll get 4 hours of sleep in a row, which is pretty much priceless at this stage. There will be bad nights and some better nights, and depending on your kid’s nature you’ve probably got another 1-6 months of this to go. Be patient and kind to each other while you just try to hang on. You’ll get more of your life back once he starts sleeping through the night. For now, everything is just triage.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/12/18 02:13 PM
2

It does suck right now, and probably will for a few more months. I called these the “zombie times” because we were both too exhausted for anything other than baby care and basic survival. But it does get better.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/12/18 01:02 AM
25

This is amazingly well-written, and like 90% of it completely and perfectly describes my life and 20+ years of marriage. I do think that being LDS presents additional challenges, not just because of our moral code but also because being raised LDS has in many cases caused our wives to develop unhealthy and dismissive attitudes about sex, so we have an uphill climb in making ourselves attractive AND an uphill climb in making our wives acknowledge our SMV and become our slut.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/12/18 01:00 AM
3

I get your frustration at the way your wife is handling taking care of your son, but those first few months with a newborn are really tough on everybody, and you both need to cut each other some slack. It sounds like she's breastfeeding, so she really is the only one that can provide his food, but you should be doing what you can to pick up slack in other areas. You're both going to be exhausted and frustrated and highly sleep-deprived until the baby starts sleeping through the night; that's jus…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/12/18 11:15 PM
2

(continued; Part 2 of 2) I have realized recently that we are both bad communicators when it comes to sex, which is weird because we are good at communicating in all other realms. She clams up and is “avoidant” in matters of sex; I have become more of an “anxious” communicator around sex because she has stonewalled for so many years. One way this manifests is in our initiations; almost every time it plays out the same way. I will increase and escalate the flirting and kino, and get more intimate…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/12/18 10:50 PM
1

OYS #11 SITUATION: Me-- 40, 5’10”, 165 lbs., ~17% bodyfat (picture method), good (but demanding) career with a solid 6-figure income. Wife--40, SAHM, married 20+ years; we have both been each other’s only sexual partner (that I know of). Two kids, one 2 years old and one early elementary school aged. READING: Have read MMSLP x2, NMMNG, WISNIFG, Book of Pook, Saving a Low Sex Marriage x2, MAP x2, The Rational Male (Year One), Models, Practical Female Psychology, Bang, Day Bang, Sex God Method, Wa…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/12/18 10:49 PM
1

You're right about all of this. But to be clear, the "no initiating in November" plan is to help me reset my own thinking around sex and the pressure I put on myself and my wife around initiating, and help me avoid and reduce in the future my needy, hovering behavior and this kind of shit: I can tell from reading your shit that sex is the 400 lb gorilla sitting on your chest. I guarantee you get anxious and sketchy as fuck when you know sex or the potential of it is coming. I think it may also h…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/11/18 11:11 PM
1

First, I have gotten a couple comments this week that show me my frame is strong and increasing and I am well past her SMV. One of the comments was, "I wish you could quit your job and we could spend every day together." That one took me for a loop. I havent heard shit like that since we were dating. When she said that I just laughed and said your pussy wouldnt be able to hold up. This is super encouraging and motivating to read how things have improved for you. Thanks for this and your continue…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/11/18 10:57 PM
1

“Focus on you, and quit judging your progress by her immediate sexual response.” I understand this, and if it was merely lack of improvement I wouldn’t care at all—but is it “normal” for the sexual relationship to get markedly worse before it gets better? I just want to be sure that I’m on the right path and that this isn’t a sign that I’m doing something really wrong in applying MRP. And I wonder if she might be pushing this toward a Main Event that I’m not really ready for yet.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/11/18 12:54 AM
1

(OYS Continued; 3 of 3) I'm trying to unravel where this is coming from. I think it's one, or some combination, of: (1) my frame has started to impose on hers and she's trying to use access to the pussy to regain power and control; (2) she's caught a bit of dread from me becoming a better man and is being self-defeating in preparing herself mentally for what she would see as the inevitable break-up in this scenario (she always jumps to the worst-case); (3) I haven't been giving her enough "Beta …
/r/MarriedRedPill13/11/18 08:08 PM
1

(OYS Continued; 2 of 3) SPIRITUAL: I had been in the process of rearticulating my Mission and my MAP but given these new realizations I’m starting all over with that recalibration. I’m committing that next week’s OYS will contain a full summary of my Mission and my MAP as I have reconstituted them. My wife is not my goal, and certainly not my mission. Nor is my marriage. Or even the sex life I want. Hopefully all of those things are involved, but they do not constitute or even factor into my pur…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/11/18 07:05 PM
1

OYS #10--WEEK 39 of MRP SITUATION: Me, 40, 5’10”, 167 lbs., ~17% bodyfat (picture method). Some new insights and some weird shit this week, and lots of work I need to do but exactly WHAT I need to do is coming more into focus. New format for OYS this week based on a template used by u/RPWolf. READING: Have read MMSLP x2, NMMNG, WISNIFG, Book of Pook, Saving a Low Sex Marriage x2, MAP x2, The Rational Male (Year One), Models, Practical Female Psychology, Bang, Day Bang, Sex God Method, Way of the…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/11/18 07:05 PM
1

For chest, it's Incline Bench, Flat Bench, Incline Barbell Bench, and I've added a Hex Press, for back it's DL, Barbell Row, Pullups, Barbell Shrugs, Lat Pulldowns, for shoulders OHP, Lateral Raise, Rear Delt Raise, Arnold Press, for legs Squat, Leg Press, Romanian Deadlift, and calf work, for arms it's more Incline Bench, Bicep Curl, Close-Grip Bench, Hammer Curls, Triceps Extension. That covers each weekday morning; then I rest on weekends and start over. Every fourth week is a "Strength Week"…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/18 06:36 PM
1

At age 40 with no experience of strength training you might be hindering your gains by working out too often. SSLP and SL are 3x a week beginner programs for a reason. There is a cycle you must complete to get stronger, Stress (lifting), recovery (eating and sleeping), Adaptation (getting stronger/ growing). Over stressing and under recovering could be the issue for your lack of gains. I get what you're saying--I switched from SL5x5 because even though it was only 3x/week I was feeling like doin…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/18 05:44 PM
1

Shit; I suck even more than I thought I did. I've got a lot of work to do (and redo). Thanks for the wake-up call.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/18 04:47 PM
1

One thing I did not mention last OYS was my displeasure with the new DR. I felt as though he was more out for himself using lines like “the FDA says” and “I am liable if”. I understand his points, I just don’t care. I want his medical opinion not what some book says. He also completely shot me down when I asked to get my T checked in this last round of blood work stating that he only checks that when symptoms for low T arise. You should look into getting a new doctor. I think many are strict abo…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/18 04:42 PM
1

Probably all true, but I’m trying not to be helpless anymore. I’m taking tangible action and following my plan to destroy my body fat. If that plan could be improved I’d gladly accept other suggestions.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/18 10:42 AM
1

I probably overstated this a bit. I’m actually the leanest I have been in a long time except I still have some stubborn belly fat I’m going to lose, so it makes me look fat. Much of it is visceral fat so it’s the hardest to get rid of, which is why I’m cutting to get really lean so that I can finally lose my slightly protruding belly. Really, almost all of my current body fat is in the belly. I started this cut two weeks ago after a 5 month bulk and I’ve already lost 5 pounds. I’m strict about m…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/18 05:21 AM
2

Also, in writing this and thinking about the points you’ve made I realize that I truly have been focused too much on my wife and sex. Even though I’ve been bullshitting myself that this is not the case, internally I have made MRP more about fixing my sex life than about improving myself to be the best man I can be. Fuck that, it stops now. I will work on my lifts, my body, my MAP, and on myself, and not worry so much about how my wife reacts Day to Day or whether she rejects my initiations for s…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/11/18 11:54 PM
1

(Continued, 2 of 2) 7) Stop complimenting her all the time. You are still being a nice guy. Women want to be desired yes but they don't want to be needed. My wife sounds like yours in the respect of not needing affection and compliments all that much. My wife also has low self-esteem so piling on prais just seems put on and try hard. A few weeks ago I decided to start only praising my wife for things she DOES, like handling a crisis with the kids well or organizing a bunch of hard-to-get doctors…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/11/18 11:09 PM
1

Thanks a lot man, I really appreciate the analysis and advice. You're right about a lot of this. A few comments and clarifications, in case they are helpful in knowing my situation better: ​ There are only fucking 9 of them and you have been here for 10 months. Come on man, are you in this or not?? Yeah, I have been bad at keeping up with my OYS posts. Definitely need to improve in reporting more regularly to keep myself on the right path. I'm definitely in this 100% and have, I think, been much…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/11/18 11:07 PM
1

Your wife feels like you're following her around like a hungry pet yowling for sex. Every kino or gaming feels like an escalation or initiation that reminds her of your unattractive sexual neediness and the unwelcome initiation that is sure to come, causing her to feel constantly hounded by your sexual neediness. I suggest that you thoroughly and thoughtfully read through all of /u/RPWolf's OYS's and posts and the critique and advice he received, as his behavior was similar to yours, and the sam…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/11/18 11:31 PM
1

(OYS Continued; 2 of 2) The second big issue is our housing situation. Neither of us is particularly happy with our current house, which we rent, and a while ago we discussed the possibility of buying a new home. We live in an expensive and very competitive housing market. We both looked at online listings for a while, and even attended a couple of open houses, and then I crunched the numbers once I had a good sense of the market and told her that with our current finances we are best to wait an…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/11/18 09:36 PM
1

OYS #9--WEEK 38 SITUATION: Me, 40, 5’10”, 169 lbs., ~17% bodyfat (picture method). Still working; seeing gains in myself but relationship might be regressing (or maybe heading for some kind of breakthrough?). Seeking advice on the situations below. READING: Have read MMSLP x2, NMMNG, WISNIFG, Book of Pook, Saving a Low Sex Marriage x2, MAP x2, The Rational Male (Year One), Models, Practical Female Psychology, Bang, Day Bang, Sex God Method, Way of the Superior Man, Ironwood Collection of Alpha M…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/11/18 09:36 PM
1

That being said, stop doing the typical Mormon man bullshit. Instead of having one baggy ill-fitting 7 year old suit go out and buy three high-quality designer fitted suits. No more white shirts, only tailored shirts that look great on you. Go out and buy 5 pairs of really good designer shoes in different colors. go to a good Barber every two weeks and maintain a modern hairstyle instead of the buzz cut or sloppy look fat Mormon dudes rock. You can be the wildest got in the group just by wearing…
/r/askMRP31/10/18 09:30 PM
1

Nothing about you or your age or your wife’s age of how long you’ve been married. What kind of advice can you expect? Not sure why those stats matter so much for this issue, and I have a pretty lengthy post history with all of the details (not that I expect you to go through it all, just that I didn't want to repeat things I've explained elsewhere that didn't seem so relevant to this question), but we're both 40 and married for 21 years. I'm not new here. ​ Past sexual trauma, or worse; childhoo…
/r/askMRP31/10/18 09:23 PM
2

Thanks. We did Dr. Finlayson-Fife's online courses together a few years back, when I was still BP; I found them interesting and they helped to open up some dialogue. I do think they helped my wife get over some of her psychological barriers with regard to sex being "evil" and "dirty" because Dr. Finlayson-Fife does a good job of showing how healthy sexuality is actually an important part of our faith. Didn't seem to have much lasting effect overall though, particularly with regard to the childho…
/r/askMRP30/10/18 04:18 PM
2

So it sounds like individual sex therapy for her is probably the best approach, rather than some sort of couples'/marriage counseling. Does anybody have any experience with sex therapy, for themselves or someone close to them? I know that there are different modalities and schools of this therapy, so I'd be interested to hear any perspectives regarding the merits of the different methodologies. And does anybody have any guidance on how best to research, vet, and select a therapist? Do you think …
/r/askMRP30/10/18 04:13 PM
2

I’m thinking that I may not have been clear enough in the OP. I won’t even be bringing up counseling or therapy until I have the “FMOFY” talk with my wife, which will only happen when I am an attractive, high value man with options and have worked my way through the levels of Dread, which is all probably about another year away for me. At that point, if she still has not responded to the improvements I have made, I will present her with the “You can choose Option A or Option B” discussion, where…
/r/askMRP30/10/18 01:28 PM
2

Essentially, when she was very young (early elementary school age, maybe 5 or 6), an older brother of one of her friends repeatedly molested her over a period of numerous months or a year. The boy was around 12 at the time (best guess), and it sounds like it was mostly just body exploration stuff, but there was some mouth stuff which gave my wife particular issues with oral sex (that's been the main trigger with us for when she freaks out and has these memories flood to the surface). There is al…
/r/askMRP30/10/18 12:26 PM
5

You guessed it. But in recent years it has seemed like the religious conditioning has not been as much of a problem as the childhood trauma.
/r/askMRP29/10/18 10:47 PM
4

You guessed it.
/r/askMRP29/10/18 10:46 PM
1

I’m not sure you do know the answer—yes, it was always both infrequent and lackluster. We didn’t have sex before marriage (we did make out plenty though and she was always ready for that), but as soon as we were married and had “permission” to have sex it was problematic. For years intercourse was painful for her so we avoided that and did other things (she eventually got over that issue). So either I was always unattractive to her or something else is preventing her from being fully sexual (lik…
/r/askMRP29/10/18 10:34 PM
1

I did this too, I'm realizing now. My wife's childhood trauma (we know the source for her) coupled with her strict religious upbringing created a real sensitivity around sex that I tiptoed around for years, feeling bad for "pressuring her" and trying to make things as comfortable and inoffensive as I possibly could in the hopes that she could become comfortable enough with the idea of sex in general to provide me the sexual relationship I so desperately wanted. At least now I've realized how wro…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/10/18 07:22 PM
5

Worth every penny for the knowledge you’ll gain. Flying blind here as to your options and the consequences of each is a really, really bad idea. Pay for the consult and get a really clear picture of each of the ways this could play out, so that you can make an informed decision as to how YOU want this to go from here, whatever your wife decides to do. It may also allow you to call her bluff if she starts saying crazy shit about what would happen in a divorce because you will know what the actual…
/r/askMRP13/10/18 12:42 AM
3

Don’t regret making the post. This is a learning experience for all of us. If there’s anything to regret, it would be wanting to punish your wife for potentially nothing and/or your own fuck-up. I’m not saying that’s the case—as I said before, it’s possible that your instinct to punish her was justified and correct, but you haven’t given us enough information here to help you with that analysis, so it looks like it’s up to you go be your own judge and make a new evaluation as to whether you have…
/r/askMRP09/10/18 11:58 PM
6

I suggest that you start doing all of the housework--make sure all of the dishes, laundry, and cleaning gets done so she doesn't need to worry about it. Then bring her flowers and chocolates every day. Seriously, it's really difficult to evaluate this without knowing the activity she's engaged in that you object to. Boundaries are one thing but there's a difference in the dynamic here depending on whether you're trying to keep her from doing something wholly normal and reasonable (e.g., monthly …
/r/askMRP09/10/18 09:39 PM
1

Calm down. So emotional and sniveling; you sound like Brett Kavanaugh. Everything is going to be okay—it’s overwhelming at first and there is a ton of new info here for you but this is a long journey and you need to take it one step at a time. Read. Lift. Fix your wardrobe, your grooming, your weight and BF% (if needed). But don’t try to do it all right away. Take your time and make a plan, with realistic and achievable short-term and long-term goals. Don’t freak out. You’ve got this, and there …
/r/askMRP05/10/18 02:22 PM
2

This is another factor in why I think StrongLifts wasn't really working for me--there's no aspect of pushing to failure. You do your 5 sets of 5 reps and that's it. My new program is more focused on trying to get extra reps and pushing until you're totally done, so I'm getting more used to this and learning how to feel when it's definitely my last rep; I don't often go to absolute failure but try to stop after a rep when I know I would fail on the next one. I'm not great at it yet but it's a new…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/18 07:07 PM
1

Is it solely location-based? So if it thinks I'm in a state where we don't have any family or friends it will have no real chance of being seen by anybody we know?
/r/askMRP28/09/18 08:43 PM
2

Thanks; I think I see what you're getting at and while I'm sure my fear of rejection is some small part of this, I have faced up to that and I don't really care. I'm actually very accustomed to performing publicly and you can't do that as many years as I have without learning to manage and bust through fear of failure/rejection by your audience. Flirting with new women is somewhat new territory for me, and the unfamiliarity makes that fear a bit stronger in that context, but I am willing to face…
/r/askMRP28/09/18 08:42 PM
2

What I couldn’t explain is the blatant lack of discretion that lead to my wife’s entire social circle and family inevitably finding out if I was cheating on her on Tinder. And I doubt you can, either. Yeah, this is almost exactly what I'm worried about. Thanks for the info and verification that my worries here are valid.
/r/askMRP28/09/18 08:16 PM
3

Just remember to take it slow. And be clear on STFU--it doesn't mean that you turn into an autist who never talks to your wife or has normal, fun conversations. And it doesn't mean that you turn into an asshole. It's only a response to her shit tests when you aren't able to respond to her shit tests in better ways like AA or AM. My brain is hamstering for an appropriate action/response. I felt failure hard at that point. I thought back to STFU and doing what I want. I grabbed my shirt and the ke…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/18 04:17 PM
5

with the changes I've made/things I've learned -could easily replace or upgrade to a different woman if this all ends tomorrow. I don't want that - would be too fucking messy, and believe with me acting as a sober captain - that she would return to form as an excellent first mate. ​ Would your attitude and optimal outcome here change if you had definitive proof that she had been cheating on you? Or would you truly be willing and able to give her a genuine second chance (without bringing it up al…
/r/askMRP26/09/18 07:06 PM
4

One of the primary truths here is to ignore what she SAYS, and follow what she DOES. Acta non verba--actions, not words. She tells you she wants an emotionally open, "sensitive" sweet guy--but how much pussy has acting in accordance with what she SAYS gotten you? That goes for you too; don't try to change your relationship by talking (just STFU for now); show changes and strength through your behavior instead.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/09/18 06:47 PM
3

The sex wasn’t worth it, the increase in shit tests weren’t worth it, laughing with her bullshit wasn’t worth it and most of all, she wasn’t worth it. … And that is where I have been stuck for two weeks, wondering what the fuck am I doing all this work for. I also need to up the fun, without being goofy. Fun keeps women coming back for more, same with men and kids… this needs to be done. I need to increase my personal options. If I can’t get out more, I am just a boring homebound smuck. I feel l…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/09/18 09:18 PM
2

2/2 MENTAL: I’m working on continuing to strengthen my frame and my fun/happy attitude. I’m feeling more confident and comfortable with how I’m presenting myself to the world all of the time. My main focus is on clearly defining my mission and my MAP, which has all been coming into more focus lately. It’s still a work in progress but I’m finally starting to see where I really want to be and what I need to do to get there. Since I started MRP, my mission has basically been to amass knowledge and …
/r/MarriedRedPill25/09/18 07:27 PM
3

OYS #8--WEEK 33 SITUATION: Me, 40, 5’10”, 175 lbs., 18% bodyfat (picture method). I’ve done a really shitty job of keeping up with OYS posts, but I have been keeping up with MRP posts and continuing to aggressively improve myself, with some noticeable results. READING: Have read MMSLP, NMMNG, WISNIFG, Book of Pook, Saving a Low Sex Marriage, MAP, The Rational Male (Year One), Models, Practical Female Psychology, Bang, Day Bang, Sex God Method, Way of the Superior Man, Ironwood Collection of Alph…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/09/18 07:27 PM
13

If your wife threatens you with a knife, there are no good outcomes that involve you sticking around. ​ Absolutely true. Of all possible relationship boundaries, "Threatening me with a deadly weapon" might actually be #1, with "Cheating" a close second. If my wife ever pulled a weapon on me in any way that wasn't 100% playful and joking, I would be filing papers immediately (not just divorce but maybe a restraining order and a petition to have her committed to a psychiatric evaluation). GTFO of …
/r/askMRP25/09/18 05:41 PM
3

You're obviously much more accomplished with this stuff than I am, so I'm willing to accept what you've said, but that's not the way I've been viewing it. To me, "alpha" and "man women want to fuck" are related but separate concepts--on a Venn Diagram there would be a lot of overlap but not 100%. Imagine a really good-looking guy who is ripped and sculpted--an objective "10" in the looks department--women are (at least initially) going to want to fuck that guy regardless of his behavior. Behavio…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/09/18 05:38 PM
3

Look for the girls who go out of their way to add value and be sure to take the time to appreciate. Find the girl who's just as likely to come over to do your laundry as they are to have sex. One is much rarer than the other in modern day. Or, in the immortal words of Silent Bob in "Clerks": "You know, there's a million fine looking women in the world, dude. But they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you." Invest in the girls that will bring you lasagna at work.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/09/18 05:29 PM
3

You really should get consistent with MFP. You can't really know what calories and macros you SHOULD be eating for a desired result until you know what you HAVE been eating and how it's been affecting your body. It's not the easiest habit to get into; what worked for me is to make a rule for myself that I can't eat or drink anything without FIRST entering it in the MFP app. After a few weeks it's just what you do and you don't even have to think about it anymore. Tracking strictly and honestly E…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/09/18 05:09 PM
4

Many of the guys here got married some time ago (some months, some years, some decades) and only found RP principles after the fact (and after the marriage was already in low-frequency sex mode). MRP teaches the ways to deal with those situations and make the most of where you find yourself now--there's no use in crying about "what might have been" or lamenting the fact that you've made mistakes in the past that brought you to this point in a marriage; it's about moving forward and fixing yourse…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/09/18 12:22 PM
3

A lot of guys confuse the issues and just use "alpha" as a code word for "a man women want to fuck." It's not accurate, but that's how it's often used.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/09/18 12:16 PM
1

Honestly, if my wife were to suddenly give me an impromptu BJ out of the blue (I've NEVER had a BJ from her at all, let alone one I didn't need to ask for), I would think something major was going on, especially if I didn't have MRP to explain what was really happening behind the scenes. It's hard to get his tone--he may have said it playfully or jokingly, but if he was serious about thinking that, it's one of the things that make me believe he might not have been redpilled and may have just stu…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/09/18 10:22 PM
1

No. It isn't. The point of dread is to be a man with options. He basically said "No. I have no options." I don't really read it that way. The follow-up post says "He admits to flirting with women just to get some female attention but he had no intention of cheating or carrying on an affair, he just wanted to feel attractive." That's only a statement of what has happened so far; it doesn't mean that he wouldn't or couldn't cheat if she continues down the no sex path and he continues to "want to f…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/09/18 07:36 PM
4

I can see it now: "Gee, wife won't fuck me... r/db ...oh what's this evil red pill stuff they're talking about...hmmm interesting" That's almost EXACTLY how I came to find MRP.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/09/18 07:30 PM
11

Or, if you DO get to that point, MRP is the proven way to get yourself out of it (one way or the other).
/r/MarriedRedPill19/09/18 06:43 PM
2

I think this is mostly right; they FIND the sexism even though there really isn't any because it's easier to criticize RP on those grounds than it is on its actual merits.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/09/18 06:42 PM
2

Who wants to bet money this newfound attraction due to dread is going to die within the next 2-3 months? What reason did this guy give this woman to keep on putting in effort? Note that even she's aware of the fact she put in effort is because she thought he'd ditch her. But now she at least believes that he would have the capability to cheat/leave her if he ever decided to (regardless of whether or not that's been his intention up to now)--isn't that the whole point of Dread? I mean, he probabl…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/09/18 06:39 PM
2

It can be a bit of a downer, but at the same time I'm also heartened by the fact that I found something much better here, and have an actual plan and focus for fixing things rather than just bitching about them to random internet strangers. Also, it's interesting to me to see some of the stories there--after all, I think there are a lot of us who found our way to MRP after spending some time wallowing in the DB forum, so I try to pick out the proto-MRPers and later see if I'm right and they show…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/09/18 06:35 PM
3

Afterwards she started questioning why I had a dick pic that I hadn't sent to her. I said "I just never know when some slut will text me a lingerie pic - I like to be prepared." I half expected a shit storm, but I grabbed the back of her neck and kissed her passionately, then went to do shit. This was fucking GOLD right here. Nice work, sir; I applaud you.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/09/18 05:15 PM
0

I think you’re making this too complicated. Remember that you are your own judge. If you want to fuck random women and you’re willing to deal with the potential consequences if any happen (accidental pregnancy, STIs, your wife finding out again and being hurt, wife potentially leaving you if she’s had enough of this, etc.), then do what you want as intelligently and as carefully as you can. If you decide that the potential consequences make fucking randos not worth the risk, then own that decisi…
/r/askMRP14/09/18 12:34 PM
1

A few years ago Sephora had a kind of “sampler pack” that had something like 20 small vials of selected colognes you could buy pretty cheap (I think it cost $25 or so but memory may be foggy). Each fragrance had enough for at least a few days of wear and it was a good opportunity to try a bunch of scents over multiple days; better than just trying it yourself in the store because you could see how you liked the scent in the context that you usually put it on and you could see how people reacted …
/r/MarriedRedPill13/09/18 11:54 PM
2

I'll share my story in case it helps. I've also been doing SL 5x5 for about six months, to which I added some light (15 lbs.) bicep curls as an accessory a few months ago. I just fought through a pretty wicked bout of Golfer's Elbow (same tendinitis as Tennis Elbow but on the inside of the elbow instead of the outside). Working with my doctor, he suggested that it was maybe from bicep curls or bench pressing and he recommended that I just stop doing these for a while, but I'm very confident in m…
/r/askMRP24/08/18 09:25 PM
4

Seems likely, but for purposes of your MARRIAGE, that actually doesn't matter now, because all of other shit you KNOW she's been doing--the almost psychotic way she's been treating you, the way she reacted to the pregnancy, the way she kicked you out and doesn't seem to care, the way she accused you of abuse, and telling you she's not in love with you--are MORE than enough for me to know that this marriage is over and you'll be far better off getting divorced even if there was no suspicion that …
/r/askMRP06/08/18 10:37 PM
1

Lose the hair, shave your head. It's fucking awesome and I'm so glad I did it. What kind of man are you if you're voluntarily signing up for your dick not to work? Upside for you is it sounds like it would be easy for you to get TRT from your doc if you need it.
/r/askMRP06/08/18 10:02 PM
11

Obviously don't make any admissions or commitments to her regarding the kid. Consult a good divorce lawyer right away to get your options for best avoiding divorce rape and child support. You do acknowledge that your marriage is over and now you're just in damage control mode, right?
/r/askMRP06/08/18 10:00 PM
1

I'm late to the party on this one but I've been struggling with these same issues a lot and wanted to try to contribute. I recently realized that I'm still carrying around a lot of covert contracts and validation-seeking when it comes to sex with my wife; I'll share what I've been doing to try to reframe things and get over these useless attitudes. I can't promise it's effective since I just started thinking about it this way about a week ago, but it has at least given me some plan to approach t…
/r/askMRP02/08/18 08:22 PM
1

Unusual to see squat #s at 3x DL. Your dick must have huge quads.
/r/askMRP18/07/18 10:09 PM
2

Dude, this had me laughing so hard I just spit the water I was drinking all over my keyboard. Well done, sir.
/r/askMRP18/07/18 09:59 PM
3

Very helpful clarification here. Thanks!
/r/MarriedRedPill18/07/18 08:05 PM
2

I like and agree with this post (women are, indeed, fucking awesome--why else would all of us bust our asses on this program in order to fuck them more?), but more so wanted to just say thank you to you, u/88Will88, for the wisdom that you have shared here. I have learned valuable information from your posts, as I'm sure many of us newer guys have. Posters like you who have succeeded in this program but still take time to post and help the rest of us really make MRP a worthwhile endeavor and a g…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/18 08:40 PM
8

This is true. I picked up a (empty) barbell for pretty much the first time in my life about 5 months ago, and have followed my program every other day since like it was a religion. My numbers are still weak and my form still needs work, but every time I feel bad about only squatting 150 I think "That's 105 pounds more than I started with, and a year ago I couldn't even begin to THINK of squatting what I'm doing now". That really helps to motivate me and keep me going to the gym 3-4 times per wee…
/r/TheRedPill11/07/18 10:33 PM
1

After reading the rational male, I was under the assumption that the person that's more ready to walk out has more power in the relationship. That's true, but it means the person who is ACTUALLY more ready to leave, not the person who just threatens to do it most often (and doesn't). Acta non verba--you demonstrate that she needs you more than you need her and that you're the one most prepared to leave through ACTIONS--your words alone mean nothing and you end up looking even weaker when you thr…
/r/askMRP09/07/18 09:20 PM
1

Great point. I’ve definitely begun to recognize that complacency is an enemy. At the same time, perhaps that familiarity makes it easier to add some mystery and attraction when we shake things up because it’s so different from what has become normal in a LTR.
/r/askMRP06/07/18 12:01 AM
1

Why did she want to when you first got together? - You were new and exciting, she did not know if you were hers. Why does she not want to now? - You are familiar and boring, she knows you are there forever. This seems like a summary of like 85% of MRP right here, boiled into these two statements. Be Attractive. Don't Be Unattractive. Then you're no longer familiar and boring and she'll have doubts as to whether you're hers forever again.
/r/askMRP05/07/18 08:09 PM
1

I don't know if I agree that it's disrespectful, per se. She is in a panicky mode, because of his past fuckery. He fucked up, true, and needs to own that--this might help to partially justify her looking through his phone, but I don't see any explanation for her sending links to her family and OP's sister other than straight-up disrespect. This is a marriage issue and should stay within their marriage; whatever she thinks he's up to or however objectionable she finds the materials she saw, this …
/r/askMRP05/07/18 07:32 PM
1

Any time you feel compelled to do these, just exit conversation. That will at least prevent you from sinking even deeper. The tools and approach strategies are really what I was after, not canned responses (which I agree are not as useful). So thanks, this is helpful. I've probably read the "Verbal Intercourse is Optional" post a dozen times, and each time it has made perfect rational sense to me and I have thought I was "getting it." You've just helped me to realize that, while I've been workin…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/06/18 07:11 PM
1

Thanks; I'll look into this.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/06/18 04:36 PM
1

Thanks man, I appreciate your help and perspective.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/06/18 04:21 PM
1

I don't want to be one at all, even though sometimes I am. What's autistic here? Explaining or not telling your wife anything when she brings it up? STFU is difficult for me--my entire life I've always focused on communicating rationally, with words, and I'm good at it. But as a result I'm less adept at other forms of communication (body language, etc.). I'm also very opinionated and can hold a good conversation about a wide variety of subjects. So my first instinct in any type of conversation i…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/06/18 03:34 PM
1

That bedtime conversation was a comprehensive list of What-Not-To-Do. Yeah, I knew at the time that I wasn't handling it well--I was too in my own head and then I was confused as to whether it was a shit test, comfort test, or main event (it seemed to have elements of all three). I clearly wasn't ready for that level of complexity. But from the comments here I see that my responses were even worse than I thought at the time. You really only have limited options to starfish - caveman, tell/make h…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/06/18 03:19 PM
1

As you're recognizing situations changing, you need to be on top of that narrative. But doesn't that contradict STFU? If you're the wife, what are you supposed to do? You're just floating in the middle waiting.... waiting for what? You don't know. It's an awkward position to be in. Are you suggesting that I explain my MAP or other plans for myself to her? Or is this just a "wait for it" type of thing where I need to just STFU and keep improving myself until she catches up and we're both on the s…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/06/18 03:09 PM
1

This entire paragraph screams covert contract to me. I've read the paragraph like 8 times now looking for it, and I'm just missing it for some reason. Can you please explain more about the covert contract you're seeing there? This seems really important. Where's your push-pull in escalation? Because from what I'm reading, you completely fail at escalating without trying to have sex - hence all your physical touch is just a precursor to what you really want - which is a really conniving way to ap…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/06/18 03:06 PM
1

The point of Dread is not to make her think that you might be seeking an affair (and especially not as a beta pussy who is afraid to tell her), but to make her aware that you have such high SMV that other, hotter women are actively seeking to have an affair with you. I do understand this concept, but the reminder is valuable; the thing is, I haven't done anything intending to scare her or make her think I might be seeking an affair. I've actually been careful not to (I generally tell her my plan…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/06/18 02:53 PM
1

(Part 3 of 3) In bed, she talked to me about her day (this is her bedtime routine) and I cheered the heroes and booed the bad guys. I lightly stroked her thighs over her pants and her stomach under her shirt, and tried to give her some kisses (receiving only closed-lip pecks in return). When I went to move my hand from her stomach to her breasts, she immediately flipped onto her stomach. I pretended nothing had changed and just started lightly stroking my fingers on her ass (over pants) and back…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/06/18 12:45 PM
1

(Part 2 of 3) FAMILY: Planning vacations and other summer activities. We’re going to a theme park this weekend. Daughter and I continue to be close—she always wants to hang out with me and constantly tells me I’m the “best Dad ever”—I’ve been making a real effort lately to make sure she also recognizes the nice things her mother does for her so that my wife doesn’t feel left out or minimized. Daughter had a great report card at the end of school (even improved significantly in weak areas from th…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/06/18 12:45 PM
2

OYS #7--WEEK 20 SITUATION: Me, 39, 5’10”, 164 lbs., 20% bodyfat (impedance). Looks like I’m on the one-OYS-post-per-month plan. The past few weeks my schedule has prevented me from posting on Tuesdays. Still working hard on myself even when I’m not updating in OYS threads, though. READING: Have read MMSLP, NMMNG, WISNIFG, Book of Pook, Saving a Low Sex Marriage, MAP, The Rational Male (Year One), Models, Practical Female Psychology, Bang, Day Bang, Sex God Method, Way of the Superior Man, Ironwo…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/06/18 12:43 PM
2

In conclusion, fitness doesn't have to be a struggle. If you really don't want to lift or go to the gym, just do some exercises at home, and do fun sports/activities that you enjoy. I've got to disagree. Exercising at home and playing sports you find fun will help, but those alone aren't going to get most guys where they want to go. Improving yourself SHOULD be hard--that's what makes it worthwhile. I started lifting around 5 months ago, at age 39, having avoided gyms and exercise in general my …
/r/TheRedPill25/06/18 06:14 PM
1

Game her in the morning in the bathroom getting ready for work, in the kitchen pick her and grind her on the edge of the counter, kino in the afternoon, game her using the kids, pick her up and carry her to the sofa for a quick grind and then leave her there. How is any of this possible when you work a full-time job in an office? I get the usefulness of "Game All Day" but I wake up at 5:00 am to go lift, home by 7:00, get showered and dressed (while wife gets kids ready for school), leave around…
/r/askMRP22/06/18 07:57 PM
0

Some great stuff right here. Good game plan for truly new MRP men.
/r/askMRP21/06/18 09:46 PM
1

Really? I’ve heard a lot of horror stories about it, being really painful or looking really bad a few years after the procedure.
/r/askMRP11/06/18 12:07 PM
-7

After that novel: What should I do? Should I give her another chance? Or should I leave? Should I make additional ultimatums? I'm guessing you know already that this isn't a question random dudes on the internet can ever answer for you. You've laid the ground rules for your new relationship and it seems as though she has accepted them and is complying, so you need to decide for yourself whether or not you want the relationship with her as it currently stands. There's no "RP" rule for this; you d…
/r/askMRP10/06/18 02:30 AM
2

So is this for you or for them? Absolutely for me. Other than this thread, I haven't mentioned or discussed it with anybody. IDGAF if people are shocked-- I was just making the point that doing this would be far out of character for old BP me. People will like it or they won't; all that is really going to matter is how I like it and feel about it. You sound timid. Do you usually consult random ppl before making a decision about yourself? Maybe I am a bit timid about this because it's a big step …
/r/askMRP08/06/18 07:31 PM
1

And should I do this at the barber for the initial shaving, or just do it at home with my own clippers?
/r/askMRP08/06/18 06:34 PM
1

Does everybody use a manual razor to keep their head shaved? Anybody had success with some kind of electric--either rotary or clipper style? How long does it take to shave your whole head with something like a Gillette Fusion?
/r/askMRP08/06/18 06:33 PM
1

Be aware, two books on the sidebar - No More Mr. Nice Guy and When I Say No, I Feel Guilty - are both heavy reads. This is correct, but might be worth noting that they are "heavy" in totally different ways. At least in my experience, NMMG is well-written and fairly quick to read through the words of each chapter, but it's emotionally draining because it rings so true and upends so many of the beliefs you've held about yourself and the way you act, that you're compelled to re-read sections and de…
/r/askMRP08/06/18 02:54 PM
6

I don’t think it’s unfair for a Captain to dictate how his ship is cleaned and cared for. That's the epitome of bad leadership. Good leadership involves empowering those who listen to you to achieve what they need to achieve, helping them when they need it, and getting out of their way to let them succeed on their own, then evaluating their work when finished and making adjustments where necessary. The worst leaders are the ones who insist that everything gets done in a specific way as dictated …
/r/askMRP08/06/18 02:36 PM
1

Your comments are so helpful in getting me to a better outlook on all of this. I feel like I have reached a pretty good point in my OI for any given attempt at initiation (as to whether or not she will accept or reject the escalation), and even, ultimately, for the marriage itself, but I hadn't yet learned how to apply a healthy attitude to these instances where she just keeps throwing starfish, but she's doing it in a sweet/nice way rather than being a bitchy shrew--I can't really criticize her…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/06/18 09:56 PM
2

Thanks for the insight. I do want to clarify a few things in hopes of continuing to refine my perspective on this. Make sure she's wet before pounding. I can guarantee you've not read advice to caveman a dry vagina here. I'm not a complete moron and I do know how the mechanics work. My original account wasn't clear but I did use lube before we started; her later request was asking for more because it was drying out. Not an unreasonable request on its face but at the time I saw it as "she's not g…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/06/18 04:58 PM
1

Just a quick follow-up FR; this actually happened last night. Wife has been sick so I haven't been initiating lately and our last sex (starfish) was over two weeks ago; last night at bedtime I was giving her some physical affection (rubbing her arm and hair, etc.) not in an effort to initiate but just to re-establish some contact so that once she's really feeling better my initiations won't seem out of place. Maybe she thought I was trying to initiate even though that really was not my intention…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/06/18 08:19 PM
2

Accept that you might just be bad at sex. Of course I'm probably bad at sex; wife has been my one and only sexual partner in life and she's never been good at it (or communicating to me how to be better at it) either; throwing starfish for two decades hasn't exactly constituted a master course in good sex. But I'm eager to learn and try new things and would like to find ways to get better at it; it's just really difficult when she has so many limitations and boundaries about sex and only allows …
/r/MarriedRedPill06/06/18 07:45 PM
5

Obviously, she's reaching out because she could tell I was in a bad mood. That's not the dynamic I want. At the same time, I appreciated it; she's not terribly emotionally open or giving, and she's really making an effort to reach out for me when I'm not feeling great. That's a real improvement. Others may disagree, but I see what happened as a huge positive that you shouldn't feel bad about at all. Sure, we want to lead and be the Oak, but we're still human after all and everybody has the rando…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/18 09:48 PM
1

I would continue to caveman it at every opportunity, and continue to lift, STFU and improve. What I've been worried about is that if I accept her "starfish" offer every time then she thinks that's sufficient and keeping me "happy" and there's no incentive/drive/pressure for her to put forth any effort or enthusiasm for more. I don't want her to start thinking everything is 100% cool just because I'm accepting her offers to lay there naked for me once or twice a week.
/r/askMRP04/06/18 11:13 PM
1

But isn't there a difference between when SHE initiates (in which case it seems obvious that you need to give it to her good, no matter how you are feeling), and when she lamely acquiesces to your escalation by offering something completely unenthusiastic (like total starfish)? And how long can you string out the obviously better "You know, you seem a little tired, babe. I'd rather you rest up and we go at it when you're really in the mood. I'm off to the gym anyway, catch you later." My wife ha…
/r/askMRP04/06/18 09:49 PM
4

I totally get the idea that if SHE wants it, it's best to never reject her or turn her down, and to make it good for her. But other than that, when we say "don't ever turn down sex," I'm still unclear as to what exactly is meant by that. I also understand the guidance about stopping mid-thrust if it's not working for you after you start. But I'm not sure how to get the congruence of frequency and enthusiasm otherwise. If she's throwing out her usual pre-emptive cockblocks before you even really …
/r/MarriedRedPill04/06/18 09:32 PM
1

So how have you been leading your wife to care more about her weight over the two years you've been lifting and making "life style changes"? Have you led her in making healthier meals for the family? This has actually been the first (and so far only) area in which I've seen significant changes in my own wife. I started lifting regularly and eating better just 4 months ago after a lifetime of being fat, weak, and out of shape. My wife is probably a good 80-ish pounds above her ideal weight, signi…
/r/askMRP04/06/18 07:15 PM
1

Yeah, I was also thinking something along the lines of "Baby, you know I've always got your back--unless you're wrong, in which case I'm happy to take you from the front."
/r/askMRP04/06/18 06:48 PM
2

I totally agree with this. So many issues that we face in our lives and with our families are in this "gray area" where there are two (or more) seemingly valid approaches, each with its own potential benefits and drawbacks (many other situations present clear "right" or "wrong" choices that implicate our own values or boundaries we have already established). In these scenarios, either you feel strongly about fixing the problem or you don't. If you know it's something you need to take care of, th…
/r/askMRP04/06/18 06:44 PM
2

Very good post and analysis of the subtext of the original article, but I can't help but notice that every example in the original article is a woman who works from home as a "freelancer" complaining that their husbands don't do enough housework. Would be interesting to know how many hours each week they actually spend "freelancing" vs. watching talk shows and how much actual net income their "freelancing" contributes to the family. Obviously, the real problem here is that their husbands are fai…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/06/18 05:36 PM
1

I'll help you on the basics of this one, because it seems particularly important in your current situation: you need to give time (a lot of time) before you start to see any changes in your wife or relationship. Find the original posts describing this in full detail, but essentially imagine that when you decide to become the capable captain of your ship, you find that your wife has become sick of your incompetence and has abandoned the ship for a lifeboat that is attached to the main ship by a 1…
/r/askMRP04/06/18 05:29 PM
2

But caution: don't be an asshole about it. This only works once you have established yourself as a capable and trustworthy leader. Just demanding that she do the dishes and the laundry while you sit on the couch watching shitty TV is not leadership but dictatorship and will not have a good outcome. A good leader must show that he is willing to do whatever tasks he delegates to others, AND that he can do those tasks as well or better than the person he is delegating to, AND that he has a good rea…
/r/askMRP04/06/18 05:22 PM
1

Thanks so much; this is extremely helpful. SGM makes a lot of sense but it seems to assume a higher level of sexual engagement than I tend to get and it’s not too clear on “lower level” DEVI stuff like this. I really appreciate the guidance.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/05/18 04:31 AM
1

If she'll take direction, then perhaps you can lead her to better sex ... for her as well as for you. If sex with you is boring as hell (even if largely because of her own lack of effort), why would she want it? Sounds great; any practical advice for how, exactly, I might begin to do that? A further example: last night, she was frustrated because issues with the kids had prevented her from getting to the gym during the day, so I told her that I would hang out with the kids and handle their bedti…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/05/18 10:19 PM
1

A simple question that got me thinking. Upon reflection, I don't think I give her much direction often when she pulls this line, because it's usually clear that she just wants to get things over with so she can go to sleep. When I do give her instructions, she will comply if it's something simple that doesn't require much activity from her (like, "roll onto your side"), but she will be more resistant if it's something that makes her work (like "get on top and ride me"). Though I should mention t…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/05/18 02:03 AM
1

OYS #6--WEEK 16 SITUATION: Me, 39, 5’10”, 161 lbs., 19.9% bodyfat (impedance). It's been a month since I last wrote an OYS; work and family commitments have kept me verybusy and made my schedule highly irregular. READING: Have read MMSLP, NMMNG, WISNIFG, much of the Sidebar, many posts in RP subreddits, Book of Pook, Saving a Low Sex Marriage by u/BluepillProfessor, the MAP, The Rational Male (Year One), Models, Practical Female Psychology, Bang, Day Bang, Sex God Method, Way of the Superior Man…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/18 07:30 PM
2

It does seem like we have a high proportion of Mormon dudes who need MRP.
/r/askMRP23/05/18 05:28 PM
1

I don't see this as a covert contract, because I'm not doing X activity believing that my wife will react in Y way as a result. I'm simply making plans for my life, which will either include anal sex with my wife by whatever date I have set in the plan, OR whatever I have declared as my option(s) as "Plan B" if my wife is not receptive to anal sex by that date. I;'m being OI because I'm not butthurt or lost if she doesn't give me what I want; instead, I know exactly what other action I'm going t…
/r/askMRP02/05/18 03:11 PM
1

But I think we SHOULD GAF about things that are entirely in our control, like lifting a certain number of times a week or gaming the wife a certain way. It’s stuff outside of our control that we should be OI about and NGAF because we can’t control them, so we keep options open—stuff like having sex with our wives a certain number of times (because while we control when we initiate, we can’t control how she responds). Setting my own specific goal to go to the gym 4 times per week and lift x-numbe…
/r/askMRP01/05/18 09:06 PM
1

This would apply more to relationships and sex goals, right? Instead of "Goal: Get anal sex from my wife," the plan should be "What will I do if I don't get anal sex from my wife by [Date]"--correct? For measurable stuff that I control, like my lift numbers, BF%, income, having specific goals and working toward ONLY that goal (and not tolerating any "Plan B") is really helpful in keeping me motivated working toward that goal.
/r/askMRP01/05/18 06:28 PM
1

nothing wrong with that. the hard part is how much of that is a healthy sexual agenda and how much is validation seeking. And that's (one reason) why it's so important that I continue improving my frame and validating myself, because if I'm no longer seeking validation from external sources, then it's only healthy sexual agenda that I'm basing my wants on.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/18 02:38 PM
1

you have used the "d" word several times in your writing. you "deserve" nothing. "deserved" springs from entitlement; and not getting what you "deserve" makes you a victim of someone else not giving you what you deserve. Thanks for pointing this out; I'll recalibrate my attitude and see if I have any covert contracts left to kill. sorry champ, it does not work this way at all. not even close. this is her negotiating attraction with herself and putting in "work" to execute on that negotiated agre…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/18 02:29 PM
1

Ah I see. So the real problem here is your wife has low libido, and you've known about it since the beginning. More or less, yeah, that's the meta-level issue here. But by "known about it from the beginning" we're talking from Day 1 of the marriage, as there was no indication prior to the wedding that we had mismatched sex drives or desires. What is your expectation here? That you can MRP her out of it? Theres a very real possibility that she will never get on your level sexually. Can you do tha…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/18 03:06 AM
1

I've noticed this phenomenon too, and this is one of the MRP concepts that I think made intuitive sense to me right away, but it sure seems like a big problem for a lot of guys. Reposting this from a comment I made in another thread in case it's helpful here: I'm still new and pathetic here, so I'm not speaking from any expertise, but I keep seeing guys posting these general questions like "When my wife asks me to do something, should I do it or tell her to fuck off?" or "Should I pick up the ph…
/r/askMRP26/04/18 10:13 PM
1

Yeah? You gonna fuck some bitches who aren't your wife? I was really talking about post-divorce relationships; I'm not a fan of cheating but not ready to completely discount the possibility either. I think you guys like to over complicate things. You know you're not supposed to look at returns on a weekly basis if you can't handle the emotions associated with it. Which is why I didn't worry much about this when it first started, but as "weekly basis" turned into "3 months of the same thing" I ca…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/18 04:11 PM
1

assuming your wife actually asked her doctor this question, and your wife > actually relayed what the doctor said . . . she needs a new OB/GYN as "not > my problem" is a shitty response. more likely she's lying to you. is wife a SAHM? She is a SAHM. One kid is school aged and the other is one y/o. Fully recognize your points re: her doctor, but the way she conveyed it to me as that the OB/GYN basically said "yep, that happens sometimes." I'm pushing her to get the hormone screen when she goes to…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/18 04:02 PM
1

I want to be sure I'm totally clear on your meaning and that I'm not misunderstanding your input. I swear I'm not a complete idiot but I feel like I might be missing stuff in your responses so I want to make sure I'm getting it. who fucking cares? hunting season is in fall. I'm reading this as saying I'm still to early in my self-improvement to worry about whether sex is getting better or worse; I should just STFU and stop overthinking how anything is affecting my wife or marriage at this point,…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/18 02:32 PM
1

now - the real question, why do you expect your wife to notice, care, or respond to your greater strength? I'm not thinking she should be ripping her clothes off and jumping on my dick because I'm a bit stronger than I was a few months ago. I'm only pointing out that there has been a noticeable REDUCTION in her responsiveness and interest in sex the past few months, which happens to be the time I've been improving myself through MRP (lifting included). I may still not be attractive (and may not …
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/18 04:31 AM
1

We're both from deeply religious backgrounds so there was no sex before marriage. We did make out a lot and couldn't keep our hands off each other, but as soon as we were married and it was "okay" to actually have sex there was immediate change. She had (still has sometimes) a ton of anxiety around sex (having grown up told it was dirty and bad) and her body image, and she also suffered vaginismus for years (so sex was a no-go even on our wedding night). For years it was "outercourse" only (she …
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/18 04:20 AM
1

11 weeks of MRP; took a few weeks to find a lifting plan and join a gym so only in 8th week of SL5x5, following program by-the-book and started with an empty bar, and missed last week and did recommended de-load (so really lost 2 weeks of weight increase progress). That's just where I'm at. I never said, and certainly don't believe, that my lift numbers are "strong" or something to be proud of I know they are pathetic and weak but I'm working at it and I'm definitely strongER now than I've been …
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/18 04:05 AM
1

Thanks, but where the hell can you find ankle socks with patterns and designs? I shop at some reasonably fashionable stores and all I usually see are white, black, or grey ankle socks.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/18 08:09 PM
2

I don't see what's wrong with a modern, well-fitting polo shirt. Sure, a worn out polo with a faded, puckered collar looks bad, and most guys tend to wear them two sizes too big, but if it's a current-season item and a flattering fit, why the polo shirt hate? There are even polo shirts included in that Google search you provided. I do agree that cross-trainers and cargo shorts are abominations. Question about socks: in a casual outfit (say jeans and cool, colorful sneakers--bright blue with whit…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/18 07:55 PM
2

OYS #5--WEEK 11 SITUATION: Me, 39, 5’10”, 165 lbs., 21.1% bodyfat (impedance). READING: Have read MMSLP, NMMNG, WISNIFG, much of the Sidebar, many posts in RP subreddits, Book of Pook, Saving a Low Sex Marriage by u/BluepillProfessor, the MAP, The Rational Male (Year One), Models, Practical Female Psychology, Bang, Day Bang. CURRENTLY READING: Alternating between Starting Strength to improve lifting form and Sex God Method. Would appreciate any recommendations for my "next up" reading when I fin…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/18 08:40 PM
8

You're way too focused on how SHE will respond to whatever you're doing. I'm still new and pathetic here, so I'm not speaking from any expertise, but I keep seeing guys posting these general questions like "When my wife asks me to do something, should I do it or tell her to fuck off?" or "Should I pick up the phone when my wife is calling me?" and it seems pretty clear to me that they're making two huge mistakes: 1. They're still operating from the decisionmaking frame of how what they're doing …
/r/askMRP24/04/18 07:20 PM
1

Anybody have any data on whether the charcoal powder stuff is really safe to use on your teeth? Like, does it somehow really just polish and remove stains, or does it work by basically sanding off the top layer of enamel? I want whiter teeth, but not at the expense of also having weaker teeth.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/18 07:22 PM
1

Yep, seems pretty simple to me.
/r/askMRP23/04/18 03:03 AM
3

This. Sounds to me like she was making a pretty reasonable request that you let her know you're not dead somewhere. Not every request a woman makes is a test. She's not demanding to know your whereabouts at all times; she's merely asking for some common courtesy. If her request strikes you as reasonable, you can admit your mistake and acknowledge her reasonable request. If her request strikes you as unreasonable, treat it like a shit test.
/r/askMRP23/04/18 03:02 AM
5

I'll leave the more substantive evaluation to the experts, but I have two comments: 1. On her way out the door she asks me if I want to play a board game later. I say, "only if its naked Twister", she smirks and leaves. This is the level of A&A I am currently aspiring to; I like this response a lot. 2. She also stated that she still feels that all the changes I am >making are not for me but someone else. She's right; the changes are NOT for her, they're for YOU.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/04/18 11:08 PM
1

Does it NEED to be a broad range? Like, if you're providing constant feelz but they're pretty much all of the happy/fun/thrilling activities variety, is that sufficient, or will a woman eventually get bored of experiencing only "positive" feelz and need you to provide something different just to shake things up once in a while? Part of me wants to say that if all she cares about is having SOME feelz, why not make them happy/fun ones, but another part sees a potential need for variety in the kind…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/04/18 10:16 PM
2

You're getting good MRP advice here, but MRP may or may not fully apply to your situation--have you ruled out the possibility that she's suffering from post-partum depression or something? Giving birth can really mess up a woman's hormones and emotions for a long time afterwards. Certainly she could be feeling these effects just 4 months after having a child--and those are still the "getting no sleep" days where the baby is often up all night. I'm not telling you to give her a pass or to let her…
/r/askMRP15/04/18 08:36 PM
1

Also, I just noticed that you don't really say much about what you perceive to be the end of the marriage--you say that it "fell apart last year" and that your wife "thinks [you] can still stay friends" but beyond that we don't have much to go on to try to help on that end. If you're sure it's over and your ready to move on, then it seems like you have accepted what happened and are moving on with a new healthier attitude for improving YOURSELF before worrying about relationships. If you're look…
/r/askMRP15/04/18 08:31 PM
1

Just know I'm not using it as an excuse anymore. I have learned to accept that this is just what life feels like now and am being a badass despite. As far as an attorney goes. It's already penciled in. This all sounds to me like you're moving in a very good direction.
/r/askMRP15/04/18 08:26 PM
1

One of each. Problem solved.
/r/askMRP13/04/18 08:59 PM
1

I'm still a MRP noob and lack the wisdom and experience of many of the guys who have already commented.The advice and criticism you're receiving seems well-placed to me, but I have two things to add: Chronic vertigo? Holy shit, I'm so sorry. I had acute vertigo once from an inner ear condition and it fucked me up like crazy for two days until a doctor told me how to fix the ear problem. I could barely walk, I was dizzy all the time, and I kept throwing up like I was motion sick. It was hell. I f…
/r/askMRP13/04/18 06:22 PM
1

Damn, man, that's scary. I'm glad you're okay. Stay strong but don't get stupid about it and do stuff that your body isn't ready to handle yet. Be smart about the recovery.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/04/18 06:57 PM
1

Obviously the usefulness of any proof of cheating depends on the specific context and that woman's situation, but I can think of many situations where a woman would be so terrified of potential social consequences (whether from her family, peer group, religion, etc.) from exposure of PROOF that she was cheating on her husband that she might give her husband anything (reasonable) that he wanted to settle out-of-court and avoid that disclosure. Sure, she might pull the "he wasn't there for me" or …
/r/askMRP09/04/18 06:36 PM
2

"Quadzilla" literally made me lol and spray my chewed-up lunch all over my computer monitor. Thanks for the laugh but -1 for the cleanup I need to do.
/r/askMRP09/04/18 06:15 PM
1

Also, while proof of cheating may not matter much if it comes to an acrimonious divorce fight in front of a judge, it CAN be very helpful in pre-trial settlement negotiations--a wife presented with the threat of public disclosure of her adultery if the process goes to trial might be much more willing to agree to the husband's conditions for a more favorable settlement. Could save money and time and get a better outcome for the husband. There are many ways in which proof that the wife cheated cou…
/r/askMRP09/04/18 05:02 PM
2

The correct reply to this: What is it about a divorce that doesn't respect your need to be a slut? That is some excellent negative inquiry right there.
/r/askMRP05/04/18 05:42 PM
2

Apparently, things don’t look the same on you when you weigh 20 pounds less. Problem is, I am looking to be down another 20 pounds and replacing it with muscle by year-end. Thinking of having a few of the better shirts/trousers tailored and then holding off on the rest. I'm ignorant about many RP topics, but this is one where I have significant knowledge and experience. Guys are always trying to get clothes that fit some "future self" they expect to be months from now. But not only can you never…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/04/18 06:42 PM
2

So just to make 100% sure I'm totally clear on this, your recommendation if the goal is hypertrophy/cosmetic is to do a "Strength" program (like SL5x5 or BLS) for a year and THEN switch to Geronda's 8x8? Thanks.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/18 09:26 PM
1

That "How to Handle Apologies" post is tremendous. It not only helped with handling these but put into sharper focus other MRP strategies and concepts. Thanks, this was really helpful! As for the compliments thing, I'm currently getting into readings about Game and SGM is on the "next readings" list.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/03/18 05:56 PM
3

I agree with this; I think you're trying to do way too much, too fast. Again, I'm no expert in the ways of MRP, but what I've learned so far (in my short time here) is clear that this program is about constant, incremental improvement of yourself, not an instant 180 (trying to do that is called "going Rambo" and it leads only to disaster). You're not going to successfully remake yourself into the person you eventually want to be in a month. Give yourself some time and let the materials sink in; …
/r/MarriedRedPill28/03/18 07:49 PM
1

He probably did tell her, and I have also researched it and explained to her why it’s happening. It’s not really that she’s surprised by the lack of periods, she’s complaining about the effects of it and the way it’s making her feel. She’s having cramps and PMS type symptoms unpredictably. Obviously it’s also making it harder for me to track her cycle, because she’s not really having one, and her mood and demeanor is unpredictable.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/03/18 03:59 AM
2

I should note that I wasn't saying "go to your room" in a cute or joking way--I was saying it in a stern way, the way I would to my young daughter if she was being punished. I was trying to defuse the situation by removing my wife (who was completely unreasonable at that moment) from the area so that I could finish tending to the baby, and then after "crisis mode" had passed I would calm down the out-of-control wife. It didn't work because wife didn't do what I told her to and, unlike my daughte…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/03/18 08:54 PM
1

Whether a woman NEEDS your frame or path shouldn't matter. Many of us are married to smart, capable women who would achieve things or have other success even without men in their lives. One point, I think, of MRP is that even though women don't NEED a Captain (as evidenced by the fact that so many BP wives take over for a drunk/absent captain and do a fine job of running things), they don't WANT to be in that role, and much of the value a capable man can provide in their lives is somebody to giv…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/03/18 08:36 PM
1

EDIT: I forgot to add earlier that last week, a few days prior to her tantrum, my wife was complaining about her messed up cycle and lack of noticeable "periods" for the past few months. I asked whether she thought her IUD might be messing with her hormones. I brought up the difference in her attitude, responsiveness, and enthusiasm around sex, and said I had suspected that it might be her IUD, and that's why I was suggesting she get a full hormone panel done. Immediately it became a discussion …
/r/MarriedRedPill27/03/18 07:45 PM
1

I asked a poor question; thanks for pointing it out. What I mean is not how to check the strength of one’s frame, but whether there’s any sort of metric or evaluation to make sure I’m progressing with building and strengthening my frame. I know that my frame is still weak and shitty, I just want to make sure I’m doing all I can to make it less weak and shitty every day, so that eventually it will NOT be weak and shitty.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/03/18 06:53 PM
1

OYS #4--WEEK 7 SITUATION: Me, 39, 5’10”, 170.8 lbs., 22.7% bodyfat (impedance). READING: Have read MMSLP, NMMNG, WISNIFG, much of the Sidebar, many posts in RP subreddits, Book of Pook, Saving a Low Sex Marriage by /u/BluepillProfessor, the MAP, The Rational Male (Year One), Models. CURRENTLY READING: Alternating between Starting Strength to improve lifting form and Practical Female Psychology; need to improve my lifting and my gaming of the wife. NEXT UP: Day Bang, Sex God Method. FITNESS: Last…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/03/18 04:29 PM
3

Guess there's no need to ask whether this one is a comfort test or a shit test...
/r/askMRP23/03/18 05:43 PM
1

My wife doesn't often get LEGITIMATELY sick, as in she needs to go to the doctor or take medication. She frequently has non-descript "symptoms" though--she says she has headaches, or stomach issues, or is really tired/has no energy, or other basic stuff that doesn't lend itself to a diagnosis or rise to the level of needing medical attention, it just conveniently gives her an excuse for shitty behavior or failure to do anything productive.
/r/askMRP22/03/18 03:20 PM
1

I'm going to leave the significant evaluation to those with more expertise than I have, but I just want to say that I think your reading goals might be too aggressive. You need more than 6 days to get through WISNIFG--it's a much tougher, longer, slower (and more painful) read than NMMNG. Especially if you're also reading Investing for Dummies at the same time. Give yourself a couple of weeks at least for WISNIFG, to give it time to sink in and make sure you're not setting yourself up for failur…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/03/18 04:41 PM
1

The family trip was highs and lows. Looking back, probably more work to have fun than I would have liked. Dude, ALL family trips are "highs and lows," and many of them seem like more trouble and expense than they are worth at the time. But going through that builds strength within your family unit, and makes memories that will pay off with a closer family in the long run. Looking back on trips my parents took us on growing up, the ones we remember, talk about and laugh about now are the ones whe…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/03/18 10:25 PM
1

Thanks for this; Rollo is on to something once again. That second paragraph is perfect. I have not denied my wife's characterization or DEERed at all. I don't care what she calls it, and I don't have any problems with calling it a mid-life crisis, but I feel like it's a minor shit-test because she's using the term "mid-life crisis" in a demeaning or minimizing way, as if what I'm doing is temporary and not genuine or legitimate but just a passing phase. Two things she doesn't understand yet, but…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/03/18 09:33 PM
1

OYS #3—Week 6 SITUATION: Me, 39, 5’10”, 173.5 lbs., 23.3% bodyfat (impedance). READING: Have read MMSLP, NMMNG, WISNIFG, much of the Sidebar, many posts in RP subreddits, Book of Pook, Saving a Low Sex Marriage by /u/BluepillProfessor, the MAP, The Rational Male (Year One). CURRENTLY READING: Alternating between Starting Strength to improve lifting form and Models; need to improve my lifting and my gaming of the wife. NEXT UP: Practical Female Psychology, Day Bang. FITNESS: I'm still fat and wea…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/03/18 07:20 PM
5

Yep, I'm raising my daughter to grow up to be a shit-testing machine. She is going to know exactly what she wants and will tolerate, she will not get pushed around by anyone, and she will respect men and women for their respective roles in society. She will stick up for herself, self-validate, and create and enforce her own boundaries, and hopefully demand those same qualities in a mate when it comes time for her to find a husband.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/03/18 09:50 PM
3

You're getting some really good advice here from some of the best guys to give it. I'm still new and not at all an expert, but I would highly recommend that once you finish reading the MAP your next book should be "Saving a Low Sex Marriage" by /u/BluepillProfessor. You can find it in digital format on Amazon. It's a great blueprint to move through various levels of "Dread" to restore sex in marriage, and reading your post I think you're in a good position to make use of it. Just follow the step…
/r/askMRP19/03/18 09:18 PM
2

Sorry to hear this; getting laid off really sucks. Please be careful not to let this affect your self worth or self-image--I got laid off a few years ago and spent more than half of a year on unemployment (I spent 9-10 hours per day on the job search but the market in my field was absolutely terrible at that time because many organizations like mine were laying off employees who did the same thing I do by the hundreds). I was never "Alpha" but there was a time when I did realize that I was "the …
/r/askMRP16/03/18 08:47 PM
1

Thanks for this very helpful information. Based on this I may dial back the calories a bit and go around 1,900/day in the proportions suggested for cutting. Question: Why does the split between carbs and fat matter that much for cutting? Let's say I set my calorie goal at 1900 or whatever, come in at or under that goal each day, AND hit my protein macro, why does it matter so much whether the rest of those calories came from carbs or fat?
/r/askMRP16/03/18 07:47 PM
4

This post is a great reminder for all of us to stay on track. I think that one of the hardest challenges for those still in the early stages of unplugging and improving themselves (or at least just for me) is that there are simultaneously SO many things that require work and improvement, and also SO MUCH new information to learn and digest. It's easy to feel overwhelmed and lost. That, I think, is why there is such a desire to go Rambo or to celebrate the win about "who should fold the socks," b…
/r/askMRP16/03/18 07:11 PM
3

Holy shit, she started at SEVEN!?!? I thought I had at least a few more years before this was even a possibility for my daughter... And I know we're supposed to be the Captain and all, but isn't a little girl getting her first period really more of the mother's realm to handle comfortably? Like, when my daughter gets her first period, I'm planning to be cool about it, reassure her that it's totally normal and a necessary part of life, and then leave all of the details and strategies up to my wif…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/03/18 06:22 PM
1

Rippetoe's "Starting Strength". It's a basically a kinesiology textbook. Thanks, I just ordered it for reference.
/r/askMRP13/03/18 04:45 PM
1

Thanks. I found your input here very helpful.
/r/askMRP13/03/18 03:48 PM
1

Thanks to all of you for your input; this is a helpful discussion. So here's what I've decided to do for now. I'm increasing my calorie goal to 2,100 per day, which should be at or just below maintenance. Macros set at 40% carb, 30% protein (158g/day), 30% fat, with a focus on continuing to clean up my diet and eat leaner foods with higher protein content. I'm going to stick with the 16:8 IF and the fasted morning training, but I've ordered some BCAA capsules that I will take before and after I …
/r/askMRP13/03/18 03:27 PM
1

You can't lose 13 pounds and reduce 2% body fat @ 5 foot 10 inch Get that out of your head I'm confused by this--do you think my BF % has reduced more or less than 3% (it's actually 3%, not 2%)? If I started at 186 lbs. carrying 26.4% of that as fat, that's about 49 lbs. of fat. If I've dropped to 174 lbs. and 23% BF, now I'm carrying around 40 lbs. of fat by percentage. Why does it seem impossible that out of 13 pounds lost, around 9 of it was fat?
/r/askMRP13/03/18 03:17 PM
1

Edit: Also those apps are bullshit. 1g of Carbohydrates = 4 Calories, 1g of Protein = 4 cal, 1g of Alcohol = 7 calories, 1g Fat = 9 Calories. The shit your doing with Fitness Pal is overestimating the Calories. Get a spreadsheet and do the math. Google docs does wonders, but that is my preference for tracking. I'm not sure what you mean by this, can you elaborate? The app seems pretty accurate in setting calorie and macro goals; setting it to 2,100 calories at 40% carb, 30% protein, 30% fat spit…
/r/askMRP13/03/18 03:11 PM
1

The StrongLifts website has very thorough pages with step-by-step instructions and videos for each of the lifts. I've studied those rigorously and watched other workout videos on YouTube, then compared my form to that of others I see at my gym who seem to know what they are doing.
/r/askMRP13/03/18 02:27 PM
1

I'm not looking for "quick results now," I'm looking for the best approach at the beginning to set me up for long-term success. I'm ready to put in the work and I know that it's a never-ending commitment to working on myself; my concern is that I want to do what I can right now to put myself in the best position through diet and lifting.
/r/askMRP13/03/18 02:26 PM
1

There’s a lot of bro science out there. It all contradicts each other at one point. I'll say. Even in this thread I'm counting (so far) 3 votes for maintenance calories, 5 votes for surplus, and 3 votes for cutting/deficit. Maybe I just need to pick one and run with it for a while, then switch to the other.
/r/askMRP12/03/18 10:00 PM
1

Understood; I am following the Stronglifts program exactly and started with an empty bar, increasing weight by 5 lbs. each workout (until I start failing reps). I'm paying a lot of attention to form and refreshing my form research before each workout to make sure I'm doing it right--there are a lot of components to proper form (hands, feet, elbows, breathing, etc.)!
/r/askMRP12/03/18 09:42 PM
1

So for calorie surplus, is there a target I should be hitting above maintenance calories, or just eat until I'm full and focus on clean, lean foods like you've listed?
/r/askMRP12/03/18 05:45 PM
1

Doing the StrongLifts program, in Week 3. When we say "caloric surplus," how far above maintenance calories are we talking?
/r/askMRP12/03/18 05:44 PM
1

Thanks; unfortunately the kids are still too young for any of the local archery ranges. I'm hoping to become good enough on my own that I can teach them myself when they're old enough.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/03/18 08:54 PM
1

Thanks man, I really appreciate the guidance. I do understand that ultimately gaming other women is on the table, but I'm not ready for that yet (my frame, Game, and lifting all need more work and time first). But I do feel like I'm in a solid place to start using some basic Game on my wife, who doesn't usually give me outright rejections for sex but often throws starfish, which I'd like to try to improve.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/03/18 08:40 PM
1

Does this recommendation stay the same if my primary purpose (for now) is to get better at gaming my wife, not yet to use this on other women?
/r/MarriedRedPill09/03/18 01:14 PM
1

Good on you. Now, can you specify them? Can you put timeframes on them? Have you got them written down, or somewhere where you are reminded of them? I have a number of specific goals that have defined criteria and time frames. Others are still more nebulous in my head and I'll be making them more tangible and specific after I hit some of the more short-term goals I have (because these later goals will be somewhat informed by my reaching of the nearer goals). Resist the offers of other MRP's to r…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/03/18 04:16 PM
2

If you've read the MAP, then you know it emphasizes attacking your weakest areas. The fact that you've read this many books at week #4 tells me you're focusing too much on that area. How the hell are you absorbing that knowledge when you've only given yourself 4 weeks to act differently? That's just how I operate. I'm a fast reader and I have a long train commute every day so I have had a lot of time to read through the materials. Also, while I've only been actively WORKING on stuff for four wee…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/03/18 04:09 PM
1

From the little bit you've written, your wife sounds like she actually tries to add value - so make sure you're doing the same. Thanks. My wife really does try to add value; she doesn't achieve as much as I would like, and I would like to see a bit more effort from her in keeping the house clean and in sex, but I know that's in large part due to my failures in leadership so I'm trying to bring out her effort by fixing myself and leading by example. I've really been focusing lately on bringing va…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/03/18 03:51 PM
1

Thanks for your comments and analysis; I had been wondering when I would see my wife's hamster starting to work but I think you're right that it's already running. suggest Models, Practical Female Psychology, Day Bang; then SGM Do you mean this in addition to, or as a replacement for, the other books I mentioned (Game, Bang, Art of Seduction)?
/r/MarriedRedPill06/03/18 03:39 PM
1

(continued, 2/2) She also does not often outright reject me for sex; she either does the pre-emptive “I feel sick” or “I’m so tired” as soon as I get home to indicate that it’s not happening (so don’t even try), or she just gives in to my initiations but lays there like a starfish and is completely unenthusiastic and not present while I’m fucking her. It’s getting harder and harder for me to tolerate that and to put forth effort when she doesn’t give any, but for now I’m maintaining and not rock…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/03/18 01:34 PM
2

OYS #2—Week 4 SITUATION: Me, 39, 5’10”, 176 lbs., 23.9% bodyfat (impedance). My first OYS post was on Feb. 13, and while I had been reading and absorbing TRP information for a few weeks prior, I really consider that my “Week 1” because that’s when my goals and plans started to gel. I cannot believe how I had let my life devolve with a lack of goals and forward momentum; I had become far too complacent in everything and I have been feeling GREAT these last few weeks because I have goals to work f…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/03/18 01:33 PM
2

What's the "swimming pool test"?
/r/askMRP28/02/18 03:44 PM
1

Threesome with your LTR is just a guilt-free excuse to fuck another chick anyway. If you're not going to touch the other girl, what's the point? If you need to ignore one of them focus on the new pussy and ignore your wife/GF (NOTE: this obviously would only be a smart play if you're already planning to leave the relationship).
/r/askMRP27/02/18 07:52 PM
1

It's less about the gender involved and more about the way she went about this. She made out and had a sexual experience with another person in your house while she thought you were asleep and didn't know about it. Read that last sentence again. Doesn't matter if that other person had a pussy or a dick (other than the extent to which you might want to watch). She wasn't even going to tell you about it until you revealed that you knew (showing a lack of respect for you and a lack of moral compunc…
/r/askMRP27/02/18 07:49 PM
1

"> Fuck Up #1 You answered the phone" I'm still confused by this; I've seen similar comments in other posts and I'm still new and learning but I just don't understand this one. Why is it so bad to answer the phone if I'm at work and my wife calls? I get it if she calls 70 times a day to complain or something, but if she generally only calls once or twice a day just to touch base and/or coordinate logistics, why is it a "fuck up" to answer the phone?
/r/askMRP22/02/18 08:42 PM
2

"never argue for real with a woman. she's a ninja and you will die" This is one of the best lines I've read. Thanks.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/02/18 10:57 PM
1

"Ya just have to BELIEVE it's there."
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/18 04:14 AM
1

Okay, I'm dying to know what you planned your answer to be if she HAD asked what you meant when you said it was a "short term problem."
/r/askMRP18/02/18 02:24 AM
5

I confess that I clicked thinking that the title was about some new (fourth) mystery orifice to fuck on the female body. Slightly disappointed, but nevertheless I think there is some good stuff to think about in this post. Thanks.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/18 01:44 AM
1

I agree that you're doing the right thing with hiring the PI. I can see the need to know for sure one way or the other; just make sure that whatever decision you make as to what to do about your marriage is what YOU want to do based on the information you have, not just because you think it's the "right" thing that society expects you to do based on what SHE is or isn't doing. I'm interested to hear further updates about what you decide.
/r/askMRP16/02/18 10:25 PM
1

Thanks. The Aikido thing isn't something I've definitely decided on, but if my daughter is going to do it then the added convenience of taking classes at the same place would push my decision over the edge. It's not letting her make the decision for me, it's that her taking classes there would be a consequential factor in my own decisionmaking. I do think I want to eventually get involved in a martial art, but I'm less sure about the timing. If my daughter doesn't push to take classes there now,…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/02/18 09:42 PM
2

Shit dude, that is a great and heartbreaking story. I can imagine how it must have felt to see your wife's writing that "skinny guys are the worst," but glad you came out of it happier. A question if I may: how was the sex life before you found MRP? Was it as good when she was doing the fitness competitions as it is now?
/r/MarriedRedPill13/02/18 06:56 PM
1

OYS #1 I've been internally debating whether I'm ready to write one of these yet, but I've decided to just start putting it out there--if nothing else, in order to hold myself accountable for progress and meeting my goals over time. SITUATION: I'm 39, 5'10", 187 lbs., 26.4% bodyfat (impedance), "skinnyfat," mostly sedentary lifestyle for 15 years. Found MRP about three weeks ago, and have since realized how much of a rut I was stuck in. I'd wake up, go to work, come home, spend time with the kid…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/02/18 04:36 PM
2

I'm a newbie here myself, so I'm far from an expert. But in The Book of Pook it talks about something that is all I could think of as I read the OP, and it follows nicely on u/Loudandboisterous123 's thinking. Pook talks about how "Perfect is Boring" and tells a story about a goofy "super horny guy" getting two girls over a "Perfect Player" who looks great and says all the right things--this happens because the Perfect Player so perfect that he is boring and the Horny Guy is fun. In addition to …
/r/askMRP09/02/18 07:55 PM
1

I don't want to hijack ice-walker's OYS, but this is one place I could really use some help--how to differentiate between a standard shit test that requires a STFU or AA/AM response and a massive disrespect that constitutes a boundary violation and should not be tolerated? I get that normal nagging and criticism is generally just a shit test, but this one seems hugely disrespectful to me. If my wife told me that she was going to "find an intelligent man who respects her" (implying that I am both…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/02/18 07:44 PM
3

OP, many here have given you advice and/or criticism regarding your situation, and they all do that well and from much more knowledge than I have. But I wanted to post to tell you, from the perspective of one new to MRP, that this is an EXTREMELY helpful and valuable post that made clear so many of the MRP principles and issues that I'm currently trying to internalize. I've recognized that covert contracts are a real problem for me, and I'm also goal-oriented, and you blew my mind by showing me …
/r/MarriedRedPill07/02/18 10:10 PM
2

I don't play fantasy sports anymore, but I used to. I think there are a lot of bad things about it but there is also some potential TRP value as long as you are careful and judicious in your approach. First, the bad stuff. Some guys get WAY too wrapped up in their fantasy teams, as if they actually matter at all. If you spend more than an hour (two MAX) or so preparing for your fantasy draft, you're wasting time. Nobody who isn't already in your fantasy league wants to hear about your fantasy te…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/02/18 08:30 PM
1

Really? Rando chicks can just show up there and do a "guest appearance" getting paid for taking cock for a day, and then just leave?
/r/askMRP31/01/18 11:07 PM
7

Housing costs vary a lot, depending on where you live. There are places in the U.S. where you literally cannot find affordable decent housing. Around New York City, you're getting a deal if you're spending $2,500 a month on, say, a 3-bedroom apartment. There is literally nothing cheaper available if you have a family and work in Manhattan, unless you want to live in a garbage apartment or a seriously unsafe neighborhood. OP doesn't say where he lives but there are areas where $2,500 per month is…
/r/askMRP31/01/18 04:41 AM
1

"You still have oneitis and wife goggles." I acknowledge that and it's definitely one of the things I need to work on. I do feel like she adds value to my life, but I also realize (only as a rational concept, not yet as an emotional one) that she is not the ONLY woman who could provide that same value (or more). "The key is to try to not make her feel bad about it. You don't want a negative association with you and sex." This makes a lot of sense to me. In the past, on the few occasions that I h…
/r/askMRP29/01/18 11:24 PM
3

Thanks for the added detail. This is helpful.
/r/askMRP29/01/18 11:14 PM
2

Why am I with her? She's a fantastic mom to our kids, she's still fun to hang out with (when it's not about sex), we have 20+ years of shared life and history, I love her, and I'm still attracted to her. If she suddenly started offering blowjobs and enthusiastic sex a few times a week, I would be very happy and would really have no other complaints.
/r/askMRP29/01/18 10:32 PM
3

Well, it's been more the 2/month than the 4/month, but really my dissatisfaction has been based on quality more than quantity. As I said, it's always been starfish PIV and nothing else, which has really frustrated me, even though I do know there are others out there getting even less. Even when we have sex it hasn't been fulfilling to me, and I was never able to fully understand what was "missing" until it all became clear last night that, despite what she SAYS (she loves me, I'm handsome, she's…
/r/askMRP29/01/18 10:16 PM
2

Thanks for all comments so far. Several of you have said that I should NEVER turn down her offer of sex--but does that still hold true when I know she's not really into it and that her offer is made grudgingly to avoid conflict and only AS A DIRECT RESULT OF MY PAST BETA BEHAVIORS? Is accepting under those circumstances somehow reinforcing that prior behavior that I want to change?
/r/askMRP29/01/18 09:22 PM
5

I'd be interested to know what, exactly, makes this such a textbook case--could you elaborate more, please? I'm not disagreeing with you and I can see some of it for myself but I'm sure there is stuff I'm missing, so a summary of your thoughts as to HOW this is so "textbook" might be really helpful for me in seeing more of the big picture.
/r/askMRP29/01/18 09:19 PM
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